Never Say Never
by Sheptastic
Summary: Is anything really ever final? Even in death? What if someone you loved - or several someones - came back to life - literally or figuratively? Please join John Sheppard for continuing adventures, along with a few familiar and not so familiar faces - in the Pegasus Galaxy.
1. Chapter 1

LEGAL STUFF:

Forward:

All characters, locations, and subsequent events in the following work of fiction are owned and held by .COM or its identities. All characters related to the show are property of ©2004, SCI FI. All rights reserved. Except for Logan Devane and a couple of other original characters. All work you are about to read is posted without permission from the aforementioned owners.

This work is strictly for purposes of entertainment and tribute to that of the original creation owned, created and held by .COM or its identities. Thank you for your attention.

Sheppard stalked angrily out of the gym with Teyla in hot pursuit. "You must talk to someone, Colonel!" she insisted. He stopped suddenly and turned on her. His eyes were full of pain tinged with rage. "No, I don't. Drop it, Teyla, I mean it!" There was no mistaking the tone in his voice. Whatever it was that haunted John Sheppard, it was getting worse. The pain had always been there, she'd noticed it the day they met, but he'd never spoken of it. When she brought it up, he'd always shut down. Today was the worst she'd ever seen, he couldn't hide the agony no matter how hard he tried. She'd always assumed that it was due to some great personal loss, but he never let on. Sheppard was a man who could talk a great deal, about a great many subjects, without ever revealing anything personal about himself. She let him go without pressing him further, because she knew that look. She wasn't worried about his ability to command, he'd never once let his personal feelings interfere with his duties, but she was worried about HIM.

Sheppard retreated to his quarters and headed straight for the balcony. The problem with this city was that he could never really "get away" from it all. He thought about the beaches he'd discovered when he found the mainland. He needed to go surfing. Problem was, he didn't have anything to use for a surfboard. Actually, the real problem was that no matter where he went, or what he did, he'd never be able to escape the pain. It was always there. Sometimes he could bury it for a while, lose it in the heat of a battle, but only for a while. He'd come to another galaxy and still, he could not outrun the pain. He closed his eyes and tried to focus on the ocean breeze as it washed over his body. Tried to find the calm that the waves and wind had always brought him. It was no use. It had been a year now, to the day. But the pain never lessened. He didn't even bother brushing the tears away as they began to stream down his face.

THREE MONTHS LATER

"Dr. Weir to the control room," Schneider's voice boomed over the intercom. She arrived a moment later. "What is it?" she asked. "The Daedalus is hailing us," he informed her. "They've returned already? I wasn't expecting them for another month or so," she replied. "Daedalus, this is Dr. Elizabeth Weir," she waited for the response. "Doctor Weir, this is Captain Michaels, just wanted to let you know we've returned with additional personnel. We should be arriving there within the next twenty minutes," he finished. "Very well, can you tell me how many?" she asked. "Ten on this trip, Doctor." He replied. "We'll be ready, Weir out," she looked perplexed, but said nothing further as she exited the control room and gave orders to prepare living quarters for the new arrivals. She had to assume that they would be military personnel, since they hadn't requested any more scientists or analysts. Sheppard hadn't said anything about needing more personnel, nor had Colonel Caldwell, so she had to assume that the decision was Hammond's. She made a mental note to ask him about it later, when she had more privacy to discuss it.

Sheppard looked haggard as he walked down the corridor leading to Beckett's office, McKay cheerfully chirping away beside him about the new toy he'd found on SP3-117. He'd been summoned to Beckett's office the moment they arrived back at the city, but McKay was simply tagging along, merely for the pleasure of hearing himself speak, he suspected. The door to Beckett's office slid open but Sheppard froze as the sound of a woman's laughter filled the air. McKay plowed into him, as he was too busy prattling on to notice that Sheppard had frozen.

Twin pairs of emerald colored eyes locked together and all activity ceased...

McKay was the first to break the silence. "Major Devane? But... that can't be..." he trailed off as the impact of what he was witnessing finally hit him. No one moved, no one spoke. All eyes were on Sheppard and Devane. Finally, a single tear slid down Sheppard's cheek.

"Logan?" he croaked.

Logan Devane nodded, tears sliding freely down her own cheeks.

"Hey there, Flyboy," she managed to croak in reply.

Without another word, she launched herself across the room and into his arms. Great, heaving sobs wracked both bodies as they clung fiercely to one another and then sank to the floor.

Beckett cleared his throat meaningfully and motioned for McKay to follow him out the door and allow them some much needed privacy. For Beckett's part, he'd never seen Sheppard so vulnerable or unguarded. Sheppard's emotions were palpable, and he was glad that no one else had been there to witness the very unmilitary-like exchange between Sheppard and Logan. He, himself, had been delighted to see Logan Devane. Someone he'd believed he would never see again. Her loss had been both professional and personal to him, as she'd been one of the few military people he felt completely at ease with.

Sheppard continued to hold her as he tried to regain enough composure to finally speak.

"Logan, what the hell...?" he trailed off, unable to finish the question. Then again, he rarely needed to finish a complete sentence around her. She knew him better than anyone in the world.

"I wasn't in that building when it blew, John," she began. "They made it look like I was, but they grabbed me as soon as I walked in the door. They knocked me out and carried me out the back way. They took my tags and my bag, and my..." she trailed off as he leaned back, reached into his shirt and pulled out his own tags. There, on the same chain, was the other item they'd stolen.

"Your ring," he finished for her.

"Yeah," she nodded sadly as she looked up into his eyes and touched the still gleaming silver claddagh ring he'd given her on her sixteenth birthday.

"Abdul Ramiin was one of the local warlords. He went to that camp looking for a doctor," she shook her head.

"And he found you," he finished for her.

"Damned insignia...It was like a magnet for him. He knew soldiers would come looking for me, so he had to make it look like I'd been killed in the explosion." She took his face in her hands and looked deeply into his eyes.

"I'm okay John. The hardest part was knowing what it would do to _you_. Knowing that you would somehow, someway find a way to blame yourself, even though you weren't there and couldn't have prevented it," she leaned forward and rested her head on his shoulder. "I missed you so much," she croaked.

Sheppard stroked her silken, golden blonde hair.

"I missed you, too," he shuddered and held her tighter. "I can't even tell you how much...I'm sorry I didn't come looking for you. I'm so sorry I believed them when they told me you were gone," he bit his lower lip to keep from breaking down again.

"You have to listen to me... There was no way for you to know. These people were good. They were organized. They had a plan in place long before they executed it. They made sure no one had any reason to believe that I was still alive. Please, John, please stop blaming yourself, I never have and I never will. But I'm here now. I made it back and I caught the first flight to the Pegasus Galaxy I could find," she grinned. "I'm really glad you decided to take the mission," she pulled back to look at him.

"It's what you wanted me to do all along, right?" he gave her a patented Sheppard half-smile.

She nodded happily.

"Oh, and by the way, just so you know, Colonel Sheppard, I've been upped a grade, too." she flashed him a wicked grin.

"Lt. Colonel Devane, now, eh? Nice." he kissed her on the forehead.

"Couldn't very well have you outranking me now, could I?" she teased.

"Certainly not," he agreed.

"You know, if anyone were to walk in here right now, we'd have a tough time explaining ourselves," she reminded him.

"I'm not really in a big hurry to let go of you right now, y'know?" he tightened his grip on her at the mere thought. "Besides, I think Beckett will keep everyone away, for a while anyway," he assured her.

"Good," she murmured, resting her head on his shoulder again, content to stay right where she was.

TWO HOURS LATER********************

"I know you'd planned on being part of this expedition before your...ordeal... Colonel, but I'm surprised you didn't wait a while before getting sent here. You've hardly had time to get back on your feet again, since returning from the dead," Caldwell's eyes assessed her unflinchingly.

Logan cleared her throat, "Permission to speak freely, sir?" she asked.

He nodded, "Of course."

"I can get back on my feet here as well as back on Earth, sir."

He nodded again, "You don't think familiar surroundings would've helped some?" he asked.

She shrugged, "Not really. I'm a soldier, sir, I've been trained to adapt, as you well know, given our history. You also know that this is something I've wanted for a very long time, and believe me, the whole time I was held prisoner, all I wanted was to get as far away from Afghanistan as I possibly could."

Caldwell smiled warmly, "Mission accomplished," he chuckled.

Logan smiled back. She knew that most people saw Caldwell as a hard-nosed, no nonsense leader, but she'd known him longer than most of them. She knew the Caldwell who could be warm and compassionate and funny.

"So," he continued on. "you will be taking command of an SG Team, just like you did back home. You've been fully briefed on the enemy here?" he waited for her to nod affirmatively. "I know you're going to hate this, but I want you to take a couple of weeks, familiarize yourself with the city, the planet and all the intel that's been collected so far," he held up a hand to halt her forthcoming protests. "It's important, Logan. Doctor Beckett tells me that you also have the Ancient gene. You need to use this time to learn how all this stuff works, I'm sure Colonel Sheppard will be happy to give you some flying lessons too," he sat back and waited for her to gather her thoughts.

"Yes, sir." she murmured.

"You've been gone a long time. You may have aced all your fitness evals, but I don't think you've given yourself the opportunity to process everything you've been through," he stated firmly, yet kindly.

"You don't think LIVING through it was enough?" she asked.

"You know better, Logan. You know the dangers of post-traumatic stress out there in the field. I can think of at least four people, right off the bat, that you've literally had to haul back from the edge... why do I need to remind you of this?" he was only slightly exasperated with her.

He'd known Logan Devane a long time, he knew her abilities and her limitations. She'd always driven herself harder than almost anyone he'd ever seen. She was strong, capable and resourceful, but not invincible. Sometimes she needed someone to reel her in. He was happy as hell to have her here, he wanted to keep her here, so he wasn't about to take any chances with her health or her safety.

"Alright, alright, I'll behave," she gave in, resisting the urge to pout.

"And don't sulk. You know you're curious about this place, so don't pretend you wouldn't enjoy having the time to explore it," he growled playfully.

CONFERENCE ROOM

Weir waved Sheppard over as he passed the doorway to the conference room. They were alone and it seemed she wanted it that way as she closed the doors behind him.

"What's up?" he asked cheerfully.

"You're in a good mood," she noted the obvious. There was a definite lightness to his step that hadn't been there before in all the time they'd been in Pegasus.

"Yep," was all he said.

"I guess I don't have to ask you how you feel about the addition of a new SG Team to the line-up," she stated wryly.

"I think it's great. Colonel Devane will be a huge asset for us," he replied.

"Yes, I'm familiar with her record... You two are... friends?" she was trying to be delicate.

"Yes," he replied warily. He'd been expecting this line of questioning from Caldwell, not Weir.

"You must have been so relieved to see her alive," again stating the obvious.

"Immensely," he acknowledged.

"Her being here, it's not going to cause any... added concern... for you, is it?" He certainly wasn't making this easy for her.

"Added concern about what?" he asked. He knew where she was going, but he wasn't about to make it easy for her. He and Logan had always been circumspect about their personal lives.

"Is it going to be a distraction for you? Every time she goes out on a mission, is it going to be hard for you to focus on your own missions?" she asked bluntly.

"No," he replied simply.

Weir stared at him, clearly vexed by his obstinence.

"No? Just no?" she snapped.

"As answers go, I thought it was pretty succinct," he tried not to smile.

"John, I need to know, so let me spell it out for you. I know the two of you are close. Close enough that she tried, for two years, to have you transferred to the SGC. I saw how devastated you were when the news came that she'd been killed in Afghanistan, not that you ever SAID anything, but it was there. You told me yourself that she was the reason you finally agreed to come on this expedition, that you were honoring her memory by doing what you knew she'd want you to do. It would be only natural for you to be distracted and overprotective now that she's back," she said.

Now he smiled. "Overprotective? Let me tell you something, Doctor, if I so much as dared think about 'overprotecting' Colonel Devane, she'd kick my ass from one side of the galaxy to the other. You said you were familiar with her record, then you should know how capable she is. *I* know how capable she is, and she's been going on off-world missions for a lot longer than I have. She knows how to handle herself and she doesn't need me to second-guess her!" he chuckled.

"I see..." she trailed off thoughtfully.

"Are we done? Colonel Caldwell is expecting me soon," he inched away as he spoke.

"Yes, we're done," she shook her head.

She didn't really know much more now than she did before. He seemed to be sincere in his assertion that he could handle the danger Logan Devane would be putting herself in on a daily basis. He certainly respected and trusted her more than anyone else she'd seen him deal with.

"John?" she stopped him before he could make it out the door.

"Yes, Doctor?" he winced.

"I'm truly happy that you have your friend back, and I'm happy that she's here," she smiled warmly.

He flashed her that patented Sheppard half-smile. "Thanks. I am too," he said softly before striding out the door.

Funny, she thought, but she could swear that, that trademark smile of his seemed a few hundred watts brighter than it had been before Logan Devane returned from the dead. She shook her head and accepted the fact that Sheppard might never divulge the full extent of his feelings for Logan. But, she thought, as long as the two of them maintained their professional demeanor, there wouldn't be any problem.


	2. Chapter 2

LATER THAT NIGHT

Logan tiptoed down the quiet, darkened hallways, grateful that she hadn't run into anyone else who might be up and about. She didn't want to attract any attention to herself, so she simply opened the door without knocking. Sheppard was laying on his side, apparently asleep.

"It's about time," he muttered.

"Excuse me?" she smiled.

"I was gonna give you another five minutes before I got up and came to your quarters," he informed her.

Sheppard pulled back the covers and looked up at her.

"You gonna stand there by the door all night, or are you coming to bed?" he asked.

"Bed," she squeaked as she crossed the room and squeezed in beside him.

"God woman, you're freezing!" he exclaimed as she settled herself into the curve of his body.

"That's because I've been up wandering the halls, while you've been snug under a warm blanket!" she elbowed him gently in the ribs.

"So?" he prodded.

"So I can see why Carson said this place was (donning her best Scottish brogue) 'bloody creepy at night.'" she giggled.

"It takes some getting used to," he admitted.

"It isn't just that..." she trailed off.

"I know," he said softly. "I was afraid I'd wake up tomorrow to find you gone again too," he choked up somewhat at the thought.

She reached back and stroked the rough stubble along his jaw. She'd missed this. Missed just being with him. They were so comfortable together it was almost ridiculous.

"John... Before I left Earth..."

"You saw my father," he finished for her. It drove everyone crazy how they were able to do that.

"You never told him what you were doing."

"I wrote him a letter."

"He showed me. You didn't say much."

He paused a moment before answering. "He didn't have clearance."

She burrowed in closer against him. "He heard about your promotion."

"I'm sure he didn't..."

"Of course he believed it!" she corrected him. "He's the one who went looking for answers about where you were. when he got your letter, he realized what a first class jerk he'd been and he wanted to find you."

Sheppard blinked in surprise. "That's surprising, coming from him. He was REALLY disappointed in me, for what happened in Afghanistan."

"I know. But what he didn't tell you, at the time, was that he was also very proud of you. He always has been."

"He asked you to tell me this?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

She squeezed his arm where he had it wrapped around her waist. "Yes he did."

"How much did you tell him about the mission?"

She shrugged. "Not a lot. I confirmed your promotion and told him that you had done a great deal to protect the world, not just the nation. He wondered if he could pull some strings, call in a few favors, so he could visit you. I told him it was highly unlikely, given the highly classified nature of your work, but I left the door open. He may just do it."

"I doubt it." he snorted.

"He loves you John." Her voice was getting scratchier with fatigue.

"Yeah, I guess."

"Johnny?" she yawned.

"Yeah?"

"I'm not going to let anyone take me from you again." she promised.

He smiled in the darkness. "I'm gonna hold you to that, Sparky."

"G'night Flyboy."

"Goodnight sweetie."

A moment later both drifted off into a deep, peaceful sleep. Probably the first peaceful night's sleep either of them had enjoyed since that terrible day when they'd been separated by her supposed death.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"Whoa!" Logan's eyes were round as saucers.

"This...is so cool!" she exclaimed as Sheppard executed several maneuvers and then went into stealth mode.

Sheppard was grinning from ear to ear. "Ya think?"

"Now see? Didn't I tell you that you'd have all kinds of new toys to play with if you came on with the SGC?" she chuckled.

"Yes you did, and you were right," he admitted.

"This is news to you?" she teased.

"You ready to try?" he asked, as if he didn't already know the answer.

"Duh!" she quipped.

He set the controls for auto-pilot and stood up to let her slide into the pilot seat. He smiled to himself at the feeling of deja-vu as he thought about the times he taught her to fly a helicopter. One of the things he'd always admired about Logan was her sense of adventure. She was practically fearless.

She was a fast learner, too. Already she was flying better and straighter than anyone else he'd taught previously, especially McKay.

"Hey, it's not me. This thing practically flies itself!" she said in awe. "It's like it reads your mind or something," she looked over at him for confirmation.

He shrugged. "Or something. You and I seem to have an easier time making the technology work than a lot of the others," he remarked.

"Like the control chair back in Antarctica?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yep."

She'd never actually sat in that chair, but she'd learned that she possessed the gene when she walked a little too close and the chair began to hum and illuminate. She confirmed it by reaching out and touching the thing, feeling the technology come to life at her touch. She'd never said anything to...

"Dr. Jackson..."

"What?" she shook herself out of her reverie.

"When are you gonna tell me what happened with Daniel? You know, when he found out you were alive?" he grabbed for the controls as she lost focus and the jumper began fly erratically.

"Nothing...really..." she stammered.

"Nothing? Uh-huh..." he stopped to reset the auto-pilot so he could focus on her instead of the jumper.

"You expect me to believe for one minute that Jackson had no reaction whatsoever to the news that you were alive?" he cocked an eyebrow at her.

"No, I didn't say that...He just..." she trailed off and looked away.

"Sparky... You DID talk to him before you left, right?"

"Yes...We talked..." she trailed off again.

It wasn't that she felt she couldn't talk to Sheppard, it was just that it was really hard for her to talk about Daniel.

"Aaaannd...?" he prodded.

"He says hello," she smirked in spite of her discomfort.

"Funny! Come on, Sparky, out with it!" he ordered.

"Okay, okay! He...wanted me to stay..." she murmured.

"Of course he did. What'd you expect him to say?"

"I expected him to wish me the best, just like he did initially." she snapped.

"That was before you *died* Sparks...He was almost as torn up as I was."

"That's what he said... I don't know, John, I was gone for a long time, and we were having problems long before that. I was sure that any feelings he had for me would have been long gone by now," she said wistfully.

"You're kidding, right? When have you EVER had a boyfriend who could get over you without a fight?" he teased.

"Oh stop!" she smacked him playfully on the arm.

"So, where exactly did you leave it with him?"

"He wanted me to stay, I wanted to go... Umm...come here, that is. Here I am."

She had a smile on her face, but it wasn't a real smile. He knew all about the *problems* she and Jackson had in the past. He also knew that they could never seem to let go. As difficult as it was, with both of them working at the SGC, they'd made it work, to some extent at least. Since Jackson wasn't military, their relationship hadn't been forbidden by regs. They were circumspect about it though, and kept things private. His team knew, but not because they advertised it. General O'Neill, for some reason, even approved of their relationship. One of their main problems stemmed from Jackson's first-hand knowledge about exactly what it was that Logan faced on duty. Having lost his wife to the Goa'uld, he wasn't thrilled at the prospect that Logan could be lost to them as well. They went round and round about it all the time.

"Do you still love him?"

She looked pained for a moment. "Not like I did. I miss him. I missed him a lot when I was in Afghanistan, but it got better over time. Let's face it, John, we never really had a chance."

"Are you gonna deck me if I say you're right?"

"Maybe. Do you feel lucky?" she challenged.

"Only since you came back, Sparky. Seriously though, you do know that out of all the guys you ever dated, I thought he was the most *okay* for you, right?"

"Uh-huh... Not that you've ever approved of ANYONE I ever went out with... You were, at least, less critical of Daniel."

"What can I say, I have high standards!" he snarked.

"Yeah? This from the guy who had a different bimbo on his arm every week?" she swatted him playfully.

"Hey! I'm flying here!" he said in mock seriousness.

"You're on auto-pilot, dork..." she trailed off as she caught sight of the mainland.

"Whoa!" she breathed.

"I told you," he smiled. "You still haven't told me how you managed to get the boards onto the Daedalus," he reminded her.

"General O'Neill was feeling incredibly generous," she winked.

"Right. Well, I know you weren't playing the sympathy card, so I'll have to take your word for it."

A shadow fell across her eyes and he instantly reached out and took her face in his hands. "Hey," he whispered.

"I would have, John... If they hadn't let me come, I would have played that sympathy card for all it was worth...and more." he could see the shame she felt at the thought of doing something she felt was wrong.

"Don't think I wouldn't have, either, Sparks. If it meant getting to you..." he trailed off and kissed her forehead. "Fortunately, General O'Neill is a savvy enough to know that you belonged here. And..." glancing behind them, "To send surfboards with you!" he flashed a boy-like grin at her.

"I knew it'd be driving you crazy. Sweet breakers like that," pointing at the shoreline, "And no way to ride 'em?"

He took the controls again and maneuvered the jumper towards the beach. "You're the best," he grinned.

"You'd have done the same for me," she reminded him.

"You bet!" he agreed.

Logan popped up the moment the jumper set down. "Let's ride, Moondoggie!" she laughed.

Sheppard was right behind her.

LATER THAT AFTERNOON

Logan paced back and forth across Dr. Heightmeyers' office. She positively loathed having to do this. But, she reminded herself, if she didn't meet with the good doctor, Caldwell would never clear her for active duty.

"How were the waves?"

"Sweet!" Logan grinned.

"I'm glad you had a chance to have some fun, for a change." she studied Devane's face. The woman didn't speak a whole lot, but she gave away volumes with her facial expressions and body language.

"Hey, there's all kinds of fun to be had, you've just gotta know where to find it." she shrugged.

Heightmeyer did her best to subdue a double-take. "It's funny how much you remind me of Colonel Sheppard." she observed.

"Really? You have both our files, so you must have put together the fact that we grew up together." Logan sat down and looked her right in the eye.

"Yes, it does show that you come from the same town..."

"And the same schools, and the Academy, and coming up through the ranks, even the same duty stations until I was assigned to the SGC and he got sent to Afghanistan." she finished for Heightmeyer.

"What it probably doesn't tell you is that our parents were close friends. Colonel Sheppard and I are both 'only-children' but, he was the son my parents never had and I was the daughter his never had. Does that explain the remarkable similarities?" she asked, only slightly insolently.

"It does, thank you. I hope that didn't hurt too much?" Heightmeyer smiled.

"Just a little," Logan admitted.

"You don't give much of yourself away, do you?"

"Nope, not much. Given the classified nature of my job, that's probably a good thing, don't you think?" she asked defensively.

"Undoubtedly. At least as far as your work is concerned, but what about your personal life? Your feelings?" Heightmeyer was zooming right in on her most sensitively guarded area.

"Look, Doc, I have a life outside of work...Well... I DID anyway," she corrected.

"You mean before you were abducted and presumed dead?" she asked.

"Yes." Logan replied.

"Were you in a relationship back then?"

"Yes."

"Does he know you're alive? What happened to you?"

"Yes."

"How's that? Is he affiliated with the SGC or the Defense Department?"

"Yes."

This was not going well. Heightmeyer decided to change tacks.

"Tell me something, Logan, have you suffered any nightmares or anything since your return from Afghanistan?"

That question threw her off a bit. She'd been expecting more questions about her ex.

"Nightmares?"

Heightmeyer nodded. "About your time in captivity?"

"Um...Some." she admitted grudgingly.

"How bad?"

"I'm not sure what you mean."

"Are they terrifying or merely annoying?" she clarified.

"Depends on the interpretation. It's nothing I can't handle." she stated confidently.

"I'm sure there's a great deal you can handle, Logan, given everything you've been through. But the psyche is a complex thing. Something that normally might seem innocuous to you, can suddenly trigger an episode of post-traumatic stress."

Logan eyed her suspiciously. "Well, after fighting the Goa'uld for a few years... Let's just say Abdul Ramiin wasn't nearly as scary." she coughed.

"No? But then again, he did something the Goa'uld never managed to do. Capture and keep you. He stole your life..." she trailed off as anger flashed in Logan's eyes. Aha, she thought, at last.

"No doctor, he stole my freedom, not my life." she seethed.

"I stand corrected. But I think we've finally arrived at what it is that might have Colonel Caldwell concerned." she leaned back and waited.

"Which is?"

"Your fear that it could happen again." She answered evenly.

Logan did chuckle at that. "I'm a little out of his reach now, Doctor."

"Not him, specifically. But there is fear, however slight, that someone, or something could steal your freedom again. And that frightens you more than the possibility of getting killed in action."

Heightmeyer was right, up to a point.

"What was the worst part about being held captive? I know you weren't raped, or sexually assaulted. They didn't beat you. What did they do?"

"They stole my freedom. I... There was so much more going on in the galaxy than Ramiin could have imagined. He had no idea, no concept about anything but his own so-called 'cause,' but I knew what was happening. I knew the Atlantis expedition had left without me, I knew I was missing out on fighting the Goa'uld and the replicators..."

"That must have been very difficult for you, but its more than that, isn't it?" she prodded.

"More?"

"Your parents were gone already, but what about this relationship you had? Didn't it hurt to be taken from a man you...loved?"

"Sure it did," she shifted uncomfortably. It had hurt a lot.

"And Colonel Sheppard?"

The pain flashed across her features so fast, it was impossible for her to hide it. Then came the anger.

"Yes, Doctor, it hurt. It hurt like hell. I knew what it would do to him, and it killed me to not be able to reach out and tell him I was still alive. Daniel was surrounded by people he cared about, and who cared about him. He had a support system. John Sheppard was alone. He was alone and he had no one to help him work through the pain of losing a lifelong friend. The ONLY friend he trusted enough to open up to and share that kind of pain with. I *WAS* his support system, and I was gone!" she snapped.

Her eyes were flashing angrily, and she blinked several times to hold back the tears.

"Now we're getting somewhere," Heightmeyer announced.


	3. Chapter 3

Logan was still feeling raw and exposed, the day after her session with Dr. Heightmeyer. Sheppard had shown her the gym a few days previously, and she desperately needed to work out some of her agression, so she'd been punching the hell out of the heavy bag. McKay found her after she'd been there for an hour, well on her way to a healthy exhaustion.

"Anyone I know?" he teased.

"Not unless you've spent any time with any warlords in Afghanistan," she smiled warmly at him.

"No, can't say that I have. I must say that I was really happy to see that you survived...Well, you know..." he stammered nervously.

"Thank you, Doctor. You seem to have... grown... alot since coming here," she observed.

"Grown? As in grown up?" he asked.

"Something like that. You were a bit of a pain in the ass when you were at the SGC," she winked.

He smiled. "Some people would say that I'm a bigger pain now," he admitted.

"Probably," she chuckled. "But now that you've been out in the field, I think you understand... more... Scientists sometimes have a tendency to develop tunnel vision when it comes to their work, they rarely see beyond their initial concepts."

McKay stared at her for a moment. She may not be a PhD, but Logan Devane was damn bright. "You're right," he admitted.

"But, from everything I've heard, you've come a long way from that irritating, self-serving know-it-all who pissed off everyone he came into contact with," she smiled warmly.

"Thanks... I think."

"Trust me... I meant that as a compliment - and well deserved. So what's up?" she asked.

"Oh, uh... Nothing, really. I just wanted to have a chance to touch base with you. I know we weren't that close or anything back on earth, but... I had a lot of respect for you and I was very sad to hear... well, you know..." he stammered again.

"Thank you, Doctor. I appreciate that."

"It's...uh...Rodney." he mumbled.

"Rodney," she smiled.

The doors slid open, admitting Bates.

"Lieutenant Bates. I was wondering where you were," she greeted him happily.

"Ma'am. It's good to see you again," he grinned boyishly.

"It's good to be seen," she smiled.

"I'm...a... going to get back to work now. It was nice talking to you, Colonel Devane," McKay backed towards the door.

"Thank you, again, Rodney." she waved, and then turned her attention back to Bates.

"I wanted to come see you earlier, but I thought you might need a chance to settle in," Bates explained.

"I've been wanting to talk to you, too," she replied.

He arched an eyebrow in surprise. "Ma'am?"

"Before I left Earth, I went and visited a few people," she walked over and reached into the backpack she'd brought with her.

"I brought you something," she handed him a stack of envelopes.

His eyes widened as he took in the script on the outside of the envelopes.

"These are...from my parents... and my brother!" he looked up at her in amazement.

"I was able to speak with them briefly. I couldn't tell them a lot, but I did tell them that I would be seeing you soon and I'd be happy to pass on a message. Your mother gave me these, to give to you," she smiled warmly.

Bates was amazed at her generosity. "I...Thank you, ma'am. I don't know what to say, I've been feeling guilty about not being able to contact them," he was struggling to keep a tight reign on his emotions.

"They know that what you're doing is important. They understand." she assured him. "Listen, I couldn't see everyone's family, so we should probably just keep this between ourselves, okay?" she instructed him.

"Yes ma'am, whatever you say. I just... After everything you've been through, you still took the time to..." he trailed off.

"It's BECAUSE of what I went through, that I knew how important something like this could be. I wish I could have done more."

"Thank you, ma'am. Thank you very much." he wanted to hug her, but he saluted instead.

"You're very welcome," she assured him.

She waited for Bates to leave before she turned around and seemingly began talking to herself.

"How much did you hear?"

Teyla emerged from the shadows near the door on the opposite side of the gym.

"More than I should have. I am sorry. I did not mean to intrude, or overhear." She was happy that she did, however. That single act, more than anything else she could have done, had won Teyla's instant respect.

"It's alright, Teyla. I know you didn't mean to."

"That was an incredible gift you gave him."

"I think any one of them would have done the same thing, given the opportunity." she shrugged off the compliment.

"Still. I can see why your people have such respect for you, and affection."

Logan chuckled in amusement. "Affection? I don't think they feel much affection when I'm putting them through their paces."

SIX MONTHS LATER.

She'd been here for six months and it still gave her the squicks every time she saw a Wraith. She'd thought the Goa'uld were creepy enough, but their creep factor paled in comparison to the Wraith. She shook her head to ward off the inevitable "What if?" that always came to mind. "What if a Goa'uld took a Wraith as a host?" No, no, no. Do not go there, she thought. Besides, the Goa'uld were all but completely wiped out by now, and in a galaxy far, far away. Little chance of that happening, provided the Wraith never found a way to Earth.

She'd almost reached her door, after weaving her way wearily down the hallway leading to her quarters, when she heard footsteps behind her. Something, not a threat, made her stop and turn just as the six foot form of solid mass bumped right into her.

"Daniel!" she gasped, recognizing him as he reached out to steady her.

"Hi," he grinned.

"I...what... Daniel...?" she stammered, completely taken aback.

Without another word, Daniel took her in his arms and kissed her fervently. She struggled a bit, eyes wide in shock, but then his mouth worked its magic and she grudgingly melted into his embrace, losing herself in his kiss. Her arms stopped flailing and she wrapped them around his neck. A moment later, Sheppard rounded the corner and stopped short at the sight of them. His eyebrow arched in surprise and he wasn't quite sure whether to stay or beat a hasty retreat. In the end, military decorum won out over discretion. He knew Logan wouldn't want to be caught smooching in the halls.

He coughed delicately. "You know, they kind of frown on that kind of behavior in the hallways here," he teased.

Logan pulled away and pushed Daniel back. She was blushing furiously, but she was glad it had been Sheppard who'd come along, rather than a junior officer.

"John," Daniel offered his hand in greeting.

"Doctor. I didn't know you were paying us a visit," Sheppard said evenly.

"Neither did I," she announced, for both of their benefits.

"Surprise!" he grinned. "Last minute kind of a thing. I wasn't really sure they were going to let me come, but General O'Neill finally agreed." he explained.

"I see," Sheppard smiled but didn't feel it. "So, how long are you staying?" he asked a little too enthusiastically.

"Not sure. Uh...but hey," he turned back to Logan. "I'm not alone on this trip. I brought a friend..." he trailed off without finishing and started to walk down the hall.

Logan knew he wanted them to follow him, but Sheppard didn't know Daniel's quirks. She shrugged and motioned for him to follow Daniel's lead. She squealed with delight, in very un-military-like fashion, when the door to a guest quarters opened revealing a dear, old friend:

"Teal'c!" she launched herself across the room and into the big Jaffa's arms.

Teal'c smiled indulgently. "It is good to see you, Logan Devane," he hugged her close.

It was Sheppard's turn to smile indulgently. Few people were able to provoke that kind of abandon in her. He'd met Teal'c only twice before. The first time was at Logan's memorial service, and then again at the SGC right before he'd set out for Atlantis. She'd been regaling him for years with tales of a great warrior she'd been working with, someone she'd called "T" who'd taught her a unique form of martial art that she, in turn, began to teach Sheppard.

Logan finally let go of Teal'c and turned to look at Sheppard.

"It's good to see you again, Teal'c," Sheppard offered his hand in greeting. Much better, in fact, than seeing Daniel Jackson, he thought to himself.

"And you, Colonel Sheppard. You are looking well," he observed.

"Thank you. So how DID you two talk General O'Neill into letting you come here?" he asked, genuinely curious.

"It was not an easy task, but he relented in the end."

Daniel smiled at Teal'c's simplistic explanation. He neglected to mention that they (mainly _he_ , himself) had been pestering Jack for months to allow them to come. Make that over a year, counting from the time Daniel first asked to be part of the original expedition.

"Well, we're glad to have you. So have you had a chance to look around at all?" Sheppard asked.

"Not as of yet," replied Teal'c.

"From what we've seen though, this place is...amazing," Daniel breathed, clearly in awe and looking every bit like a kid at Christmas.

Though, if he were to be completely honest with himself, he couldn't say for sure if he was referring to the city or to Logan. _She_ looked amazing. She always had, but she was... well... almost luminous now. She looked happier than he'd ever seen her.

"Well," she smiled. "Feel up to meeting some people?" she asked.

"Indeed," Teal'c replied.

"Sure," Daniel chimed in.

THREE WEEKS LATER.

"Logan,"

"Daniel. Why did you really come here?" she cut him off cold.

"You know why..." he stared her right in the eye.

"Look, I know this place is an archaeological dream for you, so to speak, but..." she trailed off uncertainly.

"We keep having the same *talk* right?" he finished for her. "Look, Logan, I know we've had our problems in the past, but..."

"In the past? Daniel, you weren't here two weeks before you started getting twitchy about me going on off-world missions!" she pointed out.

"I know, I know. I'm TRYING, Logan. I know we talked about this when you... came back... but, especially after what happened to you in Afghanistan... Look, I know what's it's like to live in a world without you in it, and I have to say that I didn't care for it one bit!" he stammered.

"Likewise, when you were ascended..." she reminded him.

"Then what are we doing?" he asked.

"You know the answer to that as well as I do. Daniel, you're the closest I've ever come to... well... you know. Am I crazy about you? Of course. But it doesn't mean I can live with you. It doesn't mean either of us can live with what the other isn't willing to give up..." she trailed off sadly.

They always ended up right here. Neither of them willing to give an inch.

"You're...uh...still crazy about me?" he teased, a boyish grin on his handsome face.

"Daniel," she had a warning tone in her voice.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry," he apologized sheepishly.

The one area of their relationship they'd never had problems with had been physical intimacy. When Sha're died, he thought he'd never feel that kind of passion again. Not until he met Logan. From their very first conversation, he'd felt that...pull. Logan was smart, and funny, and strong and incredibly beautiful. She was also stubborn, willfull, reckless and infuriating!

"Daniel, you know we don't work. You were the first one to recognize that. As much as we wanted to be together, we drove each other nuts!" she reminded him.

"I know," he admitted. That didn't stop him from wanting her.

THREE DAYS LATER

"Get back to the gate!" Sheppard ordered.

Teal'c was in the lead, carrying two small children and herding at least ten more. Refugees. The Wraith had come without warning, between the last time they were here and now. Sheppard, Logan, Daniel, Teal'c, Teyla, McKay and Ronon were all that remained of the Atlantis team left on the planet. The others had been sent on ahead, with a large group of refugees, back to Atlantis. Stunner fire bounced off the trees all around them as they ran full tilt toward the gate, and then a surprise: gunfire suddenly erupted as well. Someone had dropped their sidearm and a Wraith picked it up and started firing.

As they drew within view of the gate, Logan caught sight of Daniel herding people through.

"Go!" ordered Sheppard.

"Go!" echoed Logan.

Suddenly, out of the corner of her eye, she caught sight of the Wraith taking aim at Daniel.

"NO!" she yelled and dove into the line of fire. A single bullet struck her square in the abdomen and she fell with a thud.

"NO!" screamed Sheppard and Daniel in unison. Sheppard returned fire and hit the Wraith five times.

The Wraith went down and Sheppard again yelled for the rest of them to get back to base as he knelt down to check on Logan. Daniel tried to run back towards them but Ronon and McKay pushed him through the gate. On the other side, everything erupted into chaos when the gate suddenly shut down.

"What happened?! Where are Colonel's Sheppard and Devane?" demanded Caldwell. He was flanked by Teal'c and Weir.

Daniel was frantic. "Logan was hit. Sheppard's with her." he gasped.

"Sheppard ordered us through, sir. We were outnumbered and they were about to overrun us at the gate. Sheppard didn't want them getting through," Ronon explained.

"We have to go back!" Daniel shouted.

"We can't leave them there," McKay agreed.

"I will return to the planet myself," Teal'c announced.

"Hold it! Hold it everyone!" Caldwell shouted. "I have no intention of leaving the two of them out there, but you said it yourself, you were outnumbered. We don't know how many of them are on the planet, but they're probably watching the gate pretty closely. Neither of them are stupid. They've both been around the block a few times and they know how to take care of themselves," he explained.

"Logan's been shot," Daniel pointed out.

"With a gun, not a stunner." Ronon informed him.

Caldwell felt the knot in his stomach twist even more. "Understood. We need intel, people, and a plan. I'm sure Sheppard managed to get her to cover, but we need to work fast."


	4. Chapter 4

Back on the planet, Logan managed to get to her feet, with Sheppard's help. He'd spotted some cover about twenty five yards away. Lots of trees and bushes surrounding some rocky outcroppings near a cliff.

"Can you make it?" he asked, concern etched on his face.

"When have I ever not kept up with you?" she grimaced.

They dodged stunner fire as they ran full tilt toward the trees, Sheppard even managing to return fire when it appeared their escape might be cut off. They barrelled through the trees and hit the cliff wall.

"Now what?" she asked.

"We've gotta keep moving, Sparky... You okay?" he was breathing heavily.

"Ready when you..." she stopped short when her hand appeared to reach through the stone on the cliff wall.

"What is it?" Sheppard turned to look at her.

Logan motioned for him to watch as her hand again disappeared into the stone. Their eyes locked for a moment in silent communication before they both shrugged and walked right into the wall. They were in what appeared to be a cave. They could see out, but no one could see them, as evidenced by several Wraith who walked right past the cave opening while searching for them. They looked at one another in wonder and then around at their surroundings. The cave actually appeared to be more like a room. A room strangely reminiscent of any room on Atlantis.

"Stealth mode... for a cave?" Logan winced and backed up against the wall to hold herself up.

"Whoa Sparky, come here..." he took her in his arms and placed her on a nearby bench. "I need to look at this," he told her. She merely nodded as the pain finally caught up and washed over her.

Her shirt was soaked with the blood seeping from a tiny hole in her abdomen. She knew it was bad.

"Pressure," she managed to croak.

Sheppard removed his jacket, rolled it up and pressed it against her belly. Logan winced from the pain, but tried to smile for his benefit.

"Okay...We're safe, for now. You think they'll just tire of looking for us and go away?" he asked rhetorically.

"Maybe," she muttered through clenched teeth. "John, you know they're going to come back for us..."

"The Wraith?" he asked.

"Our guys..." she corrected.

"Oh them...Yeah, I know. Caldwell won't let them without a plan, though, and reinforcements. It might be a while. You doing okay?"

"Peachy," she muttered.

He didn't want to show it, but he was scared out of his mind. Not for himself, but for Logan. He was no medic, but he knew her wound was serious. He needed to get her back to Atlantis, but he wasn't about to make a break for the gate and risk getting hit himself. He'd never let a Wraith lay a hand on Logan. As much as it grated, he knew he had to sit tight and wait for help to come to them. Suddenly, he realized she wasn't quite *there* with him. He peered closely at her face and saw that she was unconscious.

"Logan?" he felt for a pulse.

"Logan!" he patted her hand feverishly. "Come on, don't do this!" he ordered. "You can't leave me," he pleaded. "Logan!" he croaked, burying his face in her neck. "Please baby, please wake up!" he begged.

A moment later he felt something brush his head. Her hand.

"I'm here," she croaked. "I'm here," she assured him.

"That's my girl," he smiled through the tears.

"John," her voice was strained and cracked.

"Yeah sweetie?" he stroked her hair as he smiled down at her.

"The bleeding...not gonna stop..." she murmured.

"Yes it will," he countered.

"No..." she started.

"Logan, I'm not gonna lose you again," he said adamantly.

"You're gonna have to take the bullet out," she coughed.

"What? Are you crazy?" he recoiled.

"Bleeding won't stop if you don't. We don't know how long we're gonna be stuck here..." she reminded him.

"Logan..."

"I'll tell you what to do...but...I might pass out..."

"Logan..." he trailed off as her eyes met his. He knew she was right. If he didn't get the bullet out and cauterize her wound, she probably wouldn't make it. He shook his head and then bent down to kiss her softly on the forehead.

"Promise me you won't leave me." he demanded.

"Not going anywhere...I promise..." she breathed.

Sheppard set about gathering up the limited supplies they had. As he began sterilizing the blade of his knife, he tried not to think about how much pain she would be in when he started cutting. He had to focus on the reason: saving her life.

TWO HOURS LATER

Sheppard sat on the floor with his head resting on Logan's lap. She'd been out for quite a while, mercifully, he thought, though he was beginning to fear that she wouldn't wake up at all, if she didn't wake up soon. He'd managed to both remove the bullet and cauterize the wound, but he didn't have any antibiotics with him to stave off any infection that might result.

He'd spent the rest of the time watching the Wraith as they systematically hunted for them. They'd come damn close to discovering the cave twice, but they still hadn't discovered the entrance.

"John?"

His head shot up and a wide smile spread across his face.

"Hey sleepyhead," he grinned. "How ya doing?"

"Peachy...What's going on with our friends out there?" she asked, her voice still dry and scratchy.

"Things seem to be dying down some... Let me get you some water," he reached for his nearby canteen.

She took a few sips and then reached up and touched his cheek affectionately. "Thanks," she murmured.

"You bet."

"I told you I wouldn't leave you," she teased.

"You've never broken a promise to me yet, I didn't expect you to start now," he smiled down at her.

Suddenly the gate came to life as an incoming wormhole opened up. Sheppard and Logan watched to see if more Wraith were coming or if it was a rescue team. Both grinned when a MALP wheeled through the event horizon.

"Right on time," Sheppard keyed his mike open.

"Colonel Sheppard?" came Caldwell's voice.

"Yes sir...Colonel Devane and I are both here, but we're gonna need some help getting to the gate," he informed him.

"Understood, what's your situation?" Caldwell asked.

"We're about 30 to 35 yards from the gate, we're hidden, but Colonel Devane is wounded and won't be able to make a run for it," Sheppard informed him.

"We're on our way," Caldwell announced.

A moment later, they saw the forms of soldiers pouring through the event horizon. Logan smiled as she saw the imposing form of Teal'c step through and start visually scanning the area. The gate shut down and Ronon immediately started dialing back out. Sheppard went to the cave entrance and stepped out far enough to flag them down. Teal'c saw him first and immediately bolted toward him. Stunner fire began to rain down on them from a knoll about a hundred yards to their left flank.

Teal'c ran headlong into the cave and stopped short, glancing around for Logan.

"Hey T... Nice of you to join us," she chirped.

"We have little time, Logan Devane, I will have to carry you myself," he announce seriously.

"Carry on T," she raised her arms up as he gingerly hefted her light form off the bench.

Next to his massive frame, Logan looked like a little doll in his arms. Teal'c turned and motioned to Sheppard that he was ready. Together they broke from the cave entrance, shouting to Caldwell that they were on their way. Their rescue party closed ranks around them as Sheppard and Teal'c made for the gate.

Beckett was waiting in the gateroom, with a stretcher, when Sheppard and Teal'c, followed closely by the rescue team, burst back through the gate.

"All present and accounted for," announced Ronon, signaling Leonard to raise the shield.

Beckett's team whisked Logan off to the infirmary with Sheppard, Daniel, Teal'c, Weir and Caldwell close behind.

A crowd of anxious people paced the halls outside the infirmary, impatiently awaiting word on Logan's condition. Beckett's staff had their hands full trying to keep both Daniel and Sheppard out of the room while they worked on her, and finally had to appeal to Caldwell's authority. What seemed like an eternity had gone by (but was, in fact two hours) when Beckett finally emerged and braced himself for the onslaught.

"How is she?" chimed Sheppard and Daniel together.

"She's stabilized and she's _SLEEPING_ , so no visitors yet," his tone was adamant. "You did a good job, John, getting that bullet out and cauterizing the wound," he added.

"I just did what she told me to do," he shrugged.

"Are you sure she's alright?" Daniel asked.

"Quite sure, Dr. Jackson. She's a might weak, due to blood loss, and she'll be out of commission for a while, but she's going to be just fine," he assured all of them.

"Good work, Doctor. You'll let me know when I can see her?" Caldwell asked.

"Of course," Beckett nodded.

"You heard the good doctor everyone, let's clear the halls," Caldwell ordered.

Two men remained after the others had gone: Daniel and Sheppard. Neither man had any intention of leaving, no matter what anyone said.

Beckett shook his head and walked away muttering, "I might have known."

"You can go clean up, if you want. I mean, I'll call you if she wakes up," Daniel offered.

"I'm fine," Sheppard muttered irritably.

"Maybe so, but Beckett's not likely to let you go in there...like that..." he trailed off, indicating Sheppard's less than clean exterior.

"I'd like to see him stop me," he growled, focused on the door to Logan's room.

"Alright, you two," Beckett came out again. "I know neither of you will leave unless you see her, so make it quick; and I do mean QUICK. She needs her rest," he almost snarled at them.

Logan's eyes were closed and her skin was pale, though less so than it was back on the planet. Daniel and Sheppard took up positions on each side of the bed. Her eyes fluttered open, taking in the sight of the two of them there.

"Hey," she croaked.

"Hey yourself," murmured Daniel.

"'Bout damn time you came back to us, Sparky," teased Sheppard.

"Yeah, yeah...Always the nag," she shot back around a yawn.

"Beckett's gonna kick us out of here any minute, but we couldn't leave..." he trailed off.

"We had to see you," chimed in Daniel.

"And me without my makeup," she quipped, somewhat loopy from the pain meds Beckett had given her.

"Alright Gentlemen," scolded Beckett. "You've seen her, you've spoken with her, now you need to leave and let her rest," he insisted.

"I'm fine, you guys. Go... I'll see you in the morning," she yawned again.

"Logan..." Daniel trailed off, then leaned down and kissed her tenderly. "Sleep well," he breathed. He shot one final look at Sheppard, then turned around and walked out of the infirmary.

"Alone at last," Sheppard snarked.

"Give us a kiss, big guy, before Carson grinds you up and puts you under a microscope," she mumbled sleepily.

"I'm not going far," he whispered in her ear.

"Thanks John... For looking after me."

"It's what we do, Sparks, what we've always done," he bent down and kissed her on the forehead. "I'll be back," he promised.

"Shower first," she teased as her eyelids fluttered sleepily.

He flashed her a wicked grin and strode out of the room. Beckett came over and rechecked her vital signs.

"I'm fine, Carson," she murmured.

"I'll be the judge of that, thank you," he smiled. "I'll tell you what though, if Colonel Sheppard hadn't taken that bullet out of you..." he trailed off.

"I really would be dead, I know," she whispered.

"He saved your life, that's for certain," Beckett nodded.

"He's been looking out for me my whole life," she confided.

"That long, has he?" Beckett teased.

"You're not going to be able to keep him out of here," she warned.

"I figured as much. The two of them will likely be back within the hour, not that you'll be up and chatting," he adjusted the drip on her I.V. and watched her succumb to the lure of oblivion - at last.

Logan woke up at 4 am to find Sheppard asleep by her side, his head resting on the bed next to her, and his arm draped protectively over her legs. She reached out and gently stroked the soft, dark hair. His head popped up, instantly alert to her wakened state.

"Sparks, you okay?" he asked dazedly.

"I'm fine," she assured him. "Go back to sleep," she ordered.

"No..." he yawned. "I'm good."

"Well, I'm not, now go back to sleep, so I can too," she ordered.

He obediently put his head back down and fell right to sleep. She smiled weakly, stroked his head once more, then drifted off again. Neither one of them was aware that Daniel was also in the room and witnessed their exchange.

The whole time he and Logan had been seeing each other, he'd never once seen her and Sheppard together (though she talked about him often) until Sheppard showed up with Jack back in Antarctica. He knew they were close. Lifelong friends, in fact, but he never really understood how close, until now. when the news came, of Logan's alleged death in Afghanistan, it had been Daniel who'd told Sheppard the news. Ordinarily, Sheppard would have been notified first, but he'd been in transit from Antarctica at the time and he, Daniel had been second on the notification list. Maybe he'd been too wrapped up in his own grief to notice the full extent of Sheppard's, maybe that was why he hadn't fully understood the bond they shared. He was pretty sure he understood it now.


	5. Chapter 5

Logan thought she would lose her mind if she didn't get back to work soon. She'd been laid up in that damned infirmary for a week before Carson finally let her go back to her own quarters. Four weeks had passed since she'd been shot, and nearly killed. She shook her head to ward off that unpleasant memory, then stood up and walked over to lean on the railing overlooking the ocean. As stir-crazy as she was going, she genuinely loved it here. She loved the ocean, she loved the mainland. She loved the fact that there were no deserts anywhere near her.

"Logan," came a voice from behind her.

"Hey there, how are you today?" she smiled in welcome.

"Just peachy. And yourself?" he smiled warmly, already knowing the answer.

"Feeling a bit cabin-feverish, sir, to tell you the truth," she smiled up at him as he came to stand beside her at the railing.

"Out here? It's as wide open as you could possibly hope for," he teased. He knew exactly what she meant.

"Come on, sir, lemme back in the game?" she wheedled.

"I told you before. You're not going back into rotation until you're 100%" he reminded her.

"I feel fine," she muttered.

"Uh-huh, until you have to do an eighty yard dash to elude the enemy. I'm acutely aware of your progress, Logan, and I want you back on duty, but not until..."

"...I'm 100%. I got it," she sulked.

Sulking was very unlike her. He knew she hated being grounded, but it was for her own good, not to mention the good of her team. He put a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry Logan."

"I know," She took his hand in her own, squeezing it gently.

Logan was probably the only one who could get away with that. Caldwell never allowed himself such familiarity with the people under his command, but, for some reason, Logan was different. He trusted her, more than he'd trusted anyone else, with the exception of his late-wife. Yet, even with her, he'd had to remain somewhat guarded, given the classified nature of his work with the SGC. So, in a sense, he was even closer to Logan than he had been to his wife.

"You know, you really scared me a few weeks ago?" he told her.

She looked up at him with anguished eyes. "I'm really sorry about that Steve..." she whispered. "In more ways than one."

He gave her hand a squeeze. "Please...don't let it happen again?"

"I'll try." she assured him.

"I know it's none of my business, but...Where did you leave things with Dr. Jackson?"

She shrugged. "Daniel is... going home..." she trailed off.

"I'm aware of that. For good?"

She shrugged again. "This place is too big a draw for him to leave for good. He'll be back."

"And where does that leave the two of you?" he eyed her curiously.

"We don't work, Steve. I don't think we ever really did," she sighed. "You've known that longer than I did."

He did, that was true. But it was quite an admission, just the same. "I don't think Dr. Jackson sees it that way."

"No, no... he does. He was the first to really recognize it, back home."

"BEFORE you were taken, presumed dead. Now, I'm not so sure," he countered.

He had been there and, in addition to his own pain, he had seen how devastated Jackson had been.

"Whatever feelings we had for one another, or still have... We both know it isn't going to work. It's time to let go, once and for all," she said.

He nodded. "Can you _do_ that?"

"We have to...Actually, I think I started to when I was trapped in Afghanistan," she shuddered at the memory.

"Until you saw him here."

"I knew it was over..." she trailed off, a twinge of sadness in her voice.

"Logan, you took a bullet for him!"

"Yeah...Well... I never said I _hated_ the man. I...Of course I CARE about him, I always will but... Anything more than that..." she shrugged again.

"His idea or yours?"

"Both."

"Are you okay?"

She smiled up at him again. "Sure. It's almost a relief, sort of, to finally have...closure, I guess,." she admitted.

"Good then, I guess. I know you have Sheppard, but if you ever need to talk..." he arched an eyebrow at her.

She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "I know you're there for me, Steve, thank you."

"And speaking of Sheppard, he should be checking in any moment now. If you promise to behave, you can come up to the control room and listen in."

She flashed him a blinding smile and placed a hand over her heart. "I swear, sir!"

He chuckled and gave her a quick hug. "Alright, come on."

Beckett watched as Logan gently administered the vaccines to a number of the Athosian children. She was quite wonderful with them. A natural, really. He wondered if she'd ever thought about having any children of her own one day. His smile broke into a wide grin as she spontaneously joined the children in song. A traditional Athosian nursery rhyme he'd heard them singing on many occasions.

Daniel, Teal'c and Sheppard arrived in time to hear them singing as well. All four stood back in the shadows, so as not to disturb the happy scene.

"Master Teal'c," came Teyla's familiar voice from behind them.

"Teyla," he bowed as she approached, smiling.

"There is someone I wish you to meet, if you have time?" she asked.

"Indeed," he excused himself and walked away with Teyla.

"If you'll excuse me, gentlemen, I need to get my supplies packed up." Beckett excused himself, as well, leaving Daniel and Sheppard alone.

There was an unspoken tension between the two men, not animosity, but they were definitely guarded.

"She's good with them."

Sheppard eyed Daniel appraisingly. "That doesn't really surprise you, does it?"

"No, not at all. Logan's always been good with kids."

"Yes, I am aware," Sheppard felt suddenly irritated at the notion that Jackson might think he knew her better than he did.

"Not that I need to tell you that, of course," Daniel smirked, sensing Sheppard's irritation.

"Nope," Sheppard grunted.

"Hi guys!" Neither of them had noticed that Logan had bid the children goodbye and was making her way toward them.

"Logan," they chimed simulataneously.

"What's going on?" she asked warily. She'd seen the seriousness in their demeanor before making her way over to them.

"Just passing time, waiting for you to stop playing with those kids, so we can go home." Sheppard answered curtly before walking off toward the jumper.

"Daniel?"

He shrugged, "What he said. Just passing the time," he replied.

"Where's Teal'c?"

"He went off somewhere with Teyla."

Logan smiled. "I think they're rather fond of each other."

"They do have a lot in common. I haven't seen him smile like that since Ishta," Daniel admitted.

"I don't know whether to be happy for them or a little sad. I mean, you and I both know how difficult it is to maintain a long distance relationship."

"And this would be a really long distance..." he nodded.

"Yes it is."

"We're leaving tomorrow," he informed her.

"I know. Colonel Caldwell told me. I... I know it's incredibly hard for you to tear yourself away from this place."

"It is. I can't believe Jack even let me go in the first place, never mind let me stay for so long. I haven't even begun to explore half of what I wanted to."

"We'll keep the light on for you, Daniel," she smiled.

"I appreciate that."

"And I'll make sure you get regular reports." She took his hand in hers.

"I appreciate that, too." he smiled warmly.

"They'll let you come back."

"Eventually."

"They really do need you," she reminded him.

"That's kind of you to say." he chuckled softly.

"It's the truth, Daniel."

"Thank you. For saying that and for saving my life a few weeks back." he wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

"You would have done the same for me."

"Yes, I would."

"I'm going to miss you. You do know that?" She stepped back a pace to look up at him.

"I'm going to miss you, too. Do me a favor?"

"Of course." she smiled.

"Be happy."

She smiled again. "I will be. I am happy. I really love it here," she told him truthfully.

"I can see that," he smiled and then looked over her head in Sheppard's direction. "I'm glad."

SEVERAL MONTHS LATER

Logan studied the plant curiously. It looked rather like an azalea bush, but not. Whatever it was, it smelled heavenly. they had nothing like this back on the Lantean mainland, but she knew better than to simply bring back any plant life that hadn't been fully scrutinized. She thought back to that plant that had been brought back to the SGC, prior to her return from Afghanistan. It had seemed innocuous, at first, but had soon taken over almost the entire place. She plucked one of the blossoms and placed it gingerly in a tightly sealed storage container. If their scientists proved it to be benign, she wouldn't mind having one of them out on the balcony of her quarters.

"Ma'am?"

"Yes, Sergeant?"

"We're all packed up and ready to go."

"Great! Let's blow this pop stand!" Give her a fire-fight any day over these science missions!

She placed the container in her pack and headed back to the group. Sergeant Hahn lingered a moment longer, breathing in the heady scent of the blossoms near him. Impulsively, he reached out and snapped off a few blossoms and shoved them carelessly into his pack, then turned to follow Logan.

LATER THAT EVENING

Doctor Elias was pacing back and forth, impatiently, as he waited for Logan to respond to his summons. Doctor Simms entered the lab and began busying herself with checking on various tests she'd been conducting. Elias felt a rush of warmth steal over him as he watched her. He'd never really noticed, before, how attractive Simms was. He even liked the way her glasses rested on her pert little nose. A smile spread across his face as he swaggered over to her workstation.

"Simms."

"Hmmmm?" she mumbled without glancing up.

"What do you say we blow off work and head out to the mainland for a while?"

She froze for a moment, uncertain that she'd heard him correctly.

"What?"

"Come on! We can get to know each other a little 'better' and have some fun," he winked.

She blinked, clearly confused. He was actually leering at her! Doctor Jacob Elias. A man who barely knew she existed a mere hour ago was standing there leering at her.

"Doctor...Are you feeling okay?"

His eyes flashed and his smile grew wider.

"I feel great. But I'd feel a lot better if you played along," he murmured suggestively, inching closer.

"I...um...think maybe you should go see Doctor Beckett," she stammered nervously.

This was getting to be really uncomfortable.

"Why don't I go and get him for you?" she tried to back toward the door.

"Why? Beckett has nothing I want. YOU, on the other hand, have EVERYTHING I want," he lunged at her and trapped her up against the desk.

"Doctor!" she cried out.

"Call me Jacob," he ordered before pressing his mouth against hers in a forceful, salacious kiss.

"No!" she tried desperately to push him away.

"Come on," he breathed into her ear as his hand slowly made it's way down her back.

"Stop it!" she shouted.

Before he could respond, Logan had her arm across his throat in a chokehold. He thrashed around, trying to dislodge her from his back.

"No need for violence ladies, there's plenty of me to go around," he tried ramming backwards into the wall to free himself, but Logan refused to let go.

Doctor Simms was standing, shaken, near the doorway, watching in shocked disbelief as Logan tried to bring the man down. She tightened her grip, realizing that Elias wouldn't give up. A moment later, he was unconscious. She stood back and let his body slump to the ground, then turned to Simms.

"You okay?"

Simms nodded, unable to speak.

"What happened?"

"I...I'm not really sure. He just... all of a sudden... It was like he was drunk or something."

Logan keyed her radio, "Security, Dr. Beckett to lab 4." she called.

"Can it wait, Colonel? I've got my hands full here!" came Beckett's reply.

"I'll have security bring him to you, then." She turned Elias onto his stomach and bound his hands behind him.

A moment later, two security guards arrived and secured Elias. Logan instructed them to take him to the infirmary and stand by while Beckett examined him.

Reports were coming in from several parts of the city. Men were suddenly behaving amorously, and inappropriately, even with women they didn't know. Logan herself, had dodged two questionable Athosian men on her way down to the lab, though they hadn't gone so far as to get physical.

She keyed her radio again. "Colonel Sheppard?"

"This is Sheppard."

"Can you meet me in the control room?"

"Be there in three."

Logan escorted Simms back to her quarters, then hurried up to the control room to meet Sheppard. Weir looked especially perturbed as she turned to face Logan. Her hair was disheveled and her face flushed.

"Elizabeth...what happened?"

"I ran into some Marine who clearly needed a little shore leave."

"Are you alright?" she gasped.

"I'm fine. He's going to be feeling some pain for a while, though. any idea what the hell is going on here?" Weir huffed.

"None. Where's..." she trailed off, looking around the control room.

"Right here. Sorry, I had to um... break up a little scuffle downstairs. What's going on?" Sheppard asked.

"No clue, other than men all over the city seem to be simultaneously losing their minds!" Logan shrugged.

"Present company excluded," he chided her.

"Right."

"So...what? A contagion of some kind?" Weir asked them both.

"More than likely, since so many are affected. How are we going to contain this...whatever it is? We don't even know how it's spread."

"Judging from what I've seen, a voluntary lockdown probably isn't going to work. We're gonna have to start rounding and locking them up," Sheppard advised.

"Colonel Sheppard! Colonel Caldwell! We've got a problem down here!" Beckett's voice sounded frantic.

CONFERENCE ROOM ONE HOUR LATER

Sheppard, Caldwell, Logan, Teyla, Weir, Beckett and McKay were sitting around the conference table trying to work out a containment plan.

Beckett shook his head. "I think Colonel Sheppard is right. For now, we're going to have to lock them up, at least until we can figure out what this contagion is and how to fight it."

Caldwell nodded. "It's only affecting the men?"

"So far anyway."

"Let's get all the women in one area, then, and start weeding through the male personnel so we can get some numbers."

Logan leaned forward. "Sir, we'll have to include the Athosian men in that roundup as well. There were a couple that were behaving questionably when I was headed for the lab earlier."

"Alright, let's get to it people!" Caldwell barked.

Sheppard pulled Logan aside before she could leave. "Who was bothering you?"

"It doesn't matter, John, it isn't their fault and I'm not going to let you go beat the hell out of them for it."

"Logan." his voice held a hard edge, as it always did when he felt her threatened in any way.

"John. We have work to do. No one hurt me, they didn't even try," she assured him.

He studied her face for a moment, then nodded and turned toward the door.

"Colonel? A moment please?"

Logan turned back towards Caldwell. "Sir?"

"Hang back a minute?"

She waited for the others to leave before speaking. "What is it, sir?"

"You sure you have no idea what it is that's setting the men off?"

She shrugged. "None, sir."

"Maybe you should stay here instead of going out into the city."

"What? Why?" she gasped.

"I don't have to tell you that things could get ugly out there, real fast."

She shook her head negatively. "I can handle myself, sir."

"I know...I know...But..." he shrugged.

She looked at him questioningly. "Steve? Are you feeling...okay?"

"I'm fine. I'm just concerned...about you..." he trailed off absently.

"Ill be fine, sir."

"Logan...You're a very beautiful woman..." he murmured drunkenly.

Uh-oh. The Steven Caldwell she knew would never say something like that to her or any other female under his command.

"So...beautiful..." he inched slowly towards her.

"Steve, I think you need to get yourself to the..."

He reached out and took her in his arms before she could react. He pulled her tightly against him and buried his face in her hair.

"You smell soooo good..." he whispered in her ear.

"Steve, you need to let go of me," she tried coaxing him softly.

"I can't help...myself... You're so...beautiful..."

He pulled back slightly and his mouth crushed down on hers. Logan felt slightly panicked as his mouth covered hers. His arms were like a vise around her, and her arms were pinned at her sides. She knew that Steve would never consciously hurt her, but the man was behaving in a decidedly un-Caldwell-like manner. She tried to wriggle free, but his arms merely tightened even more around her tiny frame. Had the situation been entirely different, Logan might have been able to appreciate what a masterful kisser Caldwell was, but right now, she was genuinely frightened. Not just for herself, but for Caldwell.

"Logan, please..." he gasped when he came up for air.

"Colonel Caldwell, you need to focus, and fight this." she gasped.

He pulled back for just a moment, to look deeply into her panic-stricken eyes.

"I tried...to fight it," he said through clenched teeth. "It's too hard..."

He began to trail kisses across her jaw and down the side of her neck. "I don't want to fight it anymore..."

His mouth clamped down hard on hers again, and he began to maneuver her over to the conference table. He was a six-foot-one wall of solid muscle, compared to her five-foot-four. If he really did force the issue, she knew she'd be no match for him. She began to struggle harder, frantically trying to force her arms free. The harder she fought, the tighter he held her. As she struggled, she held onto one comforting thought: As long as he was forced to hold onto her, he couldn't *do* anything else, because once he let go, she could defend herself. Caldwell came up for air again and looked down at her.

"Logan," he croaked.

"Colonel, you really don't want to do this..."

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "The problem is... I *really* do want to do this..."

He began trailing kisses down her neck again and sheer panic almost made Logan laugh out loud in nervousness. She usually laughed when she was nervous, but she somehow knew that her laughter might tick him off. She was getting tired from struggling with him and forced her body to try and relax. This had an immediate calming effect on Caldwell, allowing him to relax his grip a little. Logan almost gasped as one hand pulled free. She instinctively reached for her weapon and eased it out of the holster.

"Colonel, please let me go..." she said calmly.

"No, Logan, I can't..."

Using her free hand as leverage, she was able to twist her body away from him enough to point her weapon at him and fire. The zat blast dropped both of them to the floor. Him, from the full effect, her from the backlash. She lay there for a moment, breathing heavily, then shifted to her knees to crawl over to his unconscious form. She checked his pulse and breathing before allowing herself to relax.

"Sorry Steve." she whispered to him.

Good crap, she hoped he wouldn't remember what had happened when he woke up. She knew Steve Caldwell quite well, and he would be mortified by his own behavior. Not that it was any of his fault, but that wouldn't matter to him. Steve Caldwell held himself to a rigid standard of behavior.

"Logan!"

She spun around to find Teyla rushing into the conference room.

"Teyla, what's wrong?"

"What has happened to Colonel Caldwell?"

Logan looked down at the unconscious Colonel. "He...um...Wasn't feeling himself..."

"I see. This contagion has afflicted Ronon Dex as well."

"This is getting really out of hand."

"How did you subdue the Colonel, Logan?"

She showed Teyla her zat. "One shot. Help me tie him up? We're gonna have to get all the women together and try to figure this thing out."


	6. Chapter 6

THREE HOURS LATER

One by one the men of Atlantis fell victim to the strange contagion. In each case, the women banded together, subdued them, bound them and herded them to the holding cells. They were all exhausted, and still just as clueless about the origin of the contagion. They had all gathered in the science lab to try and figure out what to do about the men, and to look for some cure.

Watching the men succumb to the influence of the contagion had been hard enough, but when Sheppard fell under its spell, Logan nearly crumbled. Sheppard was her rock. Her anchor. The one person she depended on above all others. For a while they'd begun to believe he was immune to the contagion, as he was the last man to succumb. They'd been alone together, in the infirmary down the hall, when it took hold. He'd been holding her, offering comfort in the wake of everything that was happening, when all of a sudden, something changed.

"John...?"

"Hmmmmmm..."

"John, what are you doing?" her eyes widened as he buried his face in her hair.

He pulled back to look at her. "Nothing..." he smiled. "I just...Have I ever told you how great you hair smells?"

"Oh God, no!" she started to back away from him.

"Lo? What's wrong? I'm okay!" he insisted.

"John, maybe you better lock yourself up in the..."

"What? Logan, I said, I'm fine!" he started towards her.

"John...What are you trying to do to me? I _need_ you to be okay..." she pleaded continuing to back away from him.

"I _am_ okay...And all I wanna do is something I should have done a long time ago," he grinned wickedly.

He moved much to quickly for a man who appeared to be under the influence of...something. He caught her by the waist and pulled her against him. She stared up into the eyes of the man she'd trusted all her life as he bent closer and covered her lips with his own.

His kiss was much more tender, less insistent than Caldwell's. She could sense that part of Sheppard was still trying to fight the effects of the contagion. She'd known he would anyway. If there was one thing she knew, down to the depths of her soul, it was that John Sheppard would never do anything to hurt her. Never. With an anguished groan, he tore himself away from her and retreated across the room. He looked at her mournfully, guilt and pain in his eyes.

"God... I'm sorry Lo..." he said through clenched teeth.

"I know, John... It's okay..."

He shook his head vehemently. "No. It's not okay. You don't understand...I can't...control this..."

"You're a fighter, John."

"This isn't something you can fight..." he took a few more steps backward as she moved toward him.

"No!" he put his hands up, as if to ward her off. "Don't come anywhere near me... Just _don't_."

It was excruciating to watch him try and fight whatever had taken over him. Everything in her was screaming out for her to help him, to hold him, to DO something, but she knew that look well enough to do as he asked. He looked at the countertop beside him and saw her zat. Without hesitation, he picked it up and tossed it to her.

"Here... Use it!" he commanded.

"What? John, no!"

"Please Lo... I can't fight much longer and I don't want to hurt anyone. Please...I can't think about anything but... You smell soooooo good. Please..." he pleaded.

Motioning him to sit on a gurney and her eyes filled with anguish, she complied. A soft cry escaped her as Sheppard slumped back on the gurney, unconscious. She went to him, brushing back an errant strand of hair, kissed his forehead, and finally gave in to the tears.

ONE HOUR LATER

"There's one common thread here. Every one of them has mentioned something about a smell... Whatever the contagion, it must be transmitted by inhalation."

Weir and Logan exchanged glances.

"Doctor, why is it only affecting the men?"

A young scientist, Karen Sterling, on the other side of the room cleared her throat and stepped forward.

"Doctor Weir, may I speak to you in private?"

"Certainly."

They moved off to a private corner.

"I heard what you were saying about this...thing...affecting only the men."

Weir looked at her impatiently. "And?"

"That's not entirely accurate..." Sterling trailed off nervously.

"What do you mean?"

"Doctor Weir... I don't...The thing of it is... I've been feeling somewhat...amorous, myself." she was blushing furiously now.

"What are you saying? You're not going to go down to the brig and try to start letting men out of their cells?"

Sterling shook her head negatively. "No, that's not what I'm saying. You see, I'm...gay..." she trailed off again, looking Weir straight in the eye.

"Uh-huh... So what you're telling me is that you're feeling the same...uh...attraction that is driving the men here crazy?"

"Yes, but I'm completely capable of controlling it."

"How's that?"

"I don't have what it is that makes the men behave more aggressively."

"Testosterone."

"Precisely. Now, I think we're on the right track here, in thinking that it has something to do with smell...or senses, to be more precise."

"Oh?"

"Whatever this is, it's hormone driven. Attraction, on its most basic level."

"Pheromones?"

"Pheromones. The smell that we're talking about isn't really a smell, per se."

"Doctor Simms, Colonel Devane?" the two women walked over to where Weir and Sterling waited.

"I think Dr. Sterling may be onto something here."

"Oh?" Simms waited for the younger doctor to illuminate them.

"Pheromones. This contagion, whatever it is, might be...No make that, MUST be, attacking on a hormonal level, right?"

They all nodded.

"It stands to reason then, that it is somehow causing the involuntary release of female pheromones. In their heightened state, the males are attracted by those pheromones, and for some reason, they are unable to resist the biological imperative those hormones...compel."

Simms was the first to respond. "That sounds about right. But, we still don't know WHAT the contagion is."

A small container on a shelf above Weir's head caught Logan's eye. Could it be that simple? "Flowers?"

They all turned to look at her.

"Flowers. Both pleasing to the eye and one's sense of smell. Beautiful, fragrant. What better way to entice a victim?" Logan pondered out loud.

"Flowers...from where?" asked Simms.

Logan reached up to retrieve the container she'd placed the blossoms in from P3R-117.

"The seal's still intact..."

"Is that the only specimen you brought back?" Weir asked.

"Yep. I wanted to make sure it was safe before we started transplanting flowers and shrubs from other worlds here."

"What about the other members of your team? Could they have picked a few flowers, too?"

Logan thought back and tried to picture where each member of her team had been while they were on the planet.

"Hahn. He was the only one near the shrub I pulled this off of. But why would he break protocol...?"

"Maybe the scent had already begun to take hold. Maybe he wasn't thinking clearly." Simms offered.

"Okay. so we know what it "might be" but what does that tell us? How do we stop it?"

A noise down the hall caught their attention.

"Infirmary."

Caldwell, Beckett, McKay, Ronon and Sheppard were the only men they had tied up in the infirmary. The others were all in holding cells. Logan and Teyla took point as they cautiously made their way down the hall toward the infirmary. Weir and Simms followed behind them.

"Colonel Caldwell. You're awake." Logan smiled warmly at him.

"I need to speak with you, Colonel Devane."

He seemed calm enough. Of course, his demeanor had changed in an instant earlier.

"I'm not sure that's such a good idea, Colonel," Weir cautioned.

Logan shook her head. "It's okay Elizabeth. He's cuffed to the gurney, he's not going anywhere."

She motioned for them to leave the room.

"What happened?" he asked as soon as the others were gone.

"You don't remember?" she asked, hoping that was indeed the case.

"No, I do...But I don't know how I ended up here."

"I um...had to zat you, sir."

He looked chagrined. "I see."

"Sorry about that." she winced.

"You did the right thing," he sighed deeply, remorse written all over his face.

"I'm glad you think so, sir."

"It worked."

"Well, yeah...Being zatted to unconsciousness will usually stop anybody..."

"No, I mean it made...it...whatever...stop. It cleared my head," he told her.

Logan stared at him for a moment, trying to process what he said. "Beg pardon?"

"Look, I don't pretend to understand it, but for some reason that zat blast knocked...whatever that was... right out of me. Call it what you want, shocked it out, burned it out, I don't know. The point is, I am myself again," he explained.

"You are... And I'm supposed to take you at your word...why?" she stared up into his eyes, not quite daring to hope.

"I understand your concern, Colonel, believe me. Run whatever tests on me that you have to, but I'm telling you, I'm fine now."

"I want to believe you, sir, I can't tell you how much, but you have to understand. We're still not sure exactly what this thing is or how it really works. Suppose you _are_ back to normal, what if you get re-infected?"

He looked away for a moment before answering her. "Then you zat me again."

"I can't keep zatting you, Steve, it'll kill you, and frankly we kind of like you and we really need you around," she murmured. " ** _I_** need you..."

He allowed himself a weak smile at that. "Thank you, Logan. What DO you know about this? Do you need Beckett or McKay?"

"Both, actually. We're thinking the source might be organic, but that's just a guess at this point. We need both Rodney and Carson in order to really nail it down."

"Did you zat them, too?"

"No...uh...We tranq'd them..." she trailed off sheepishly.

"That bad, huh?"

"Fraid so, sir."

"How many are down?"

She shrugged, "Well, _all_ of them, sir."

"Define all?"

"Every male on the base, plus a handful of Athosians who happened to be in the city during the outbreak. We've contacted the mainland, but the men out there haven't been affected and everyone seems to be fine. Looks like it's confined to the city itself."

Caldwell stared at her incredulously. "How'd you manage to...?"

"Tranq's mostly. Teyla knocked out a few herself, as did Doctor Weir."

"Really?"

Logan nodded and smiled.

"Didn't think she had it in her... Okay. Who can run some tests on me to see if it's safe to let me out of here and if the zats will work on the others?"

"Dr. Simms and Dr. Sterling."

"Let's do it."

"Yes sir."

"And Colonel?"

"Yes sir?"

"About my behavior before...Please accept my apology?"

"No apology necessary, Steve," she murmured, reaching over to give his hand a squeeze.

THREE HOURS LATER

"It's carried by the flowers and the women."

McKay shook his head. "We know _that_ much. But that doesn't tell us how a shot from a zat cures it, or even if it's a permanent _fix_!" he snapped.

"The more we understand about this, the better we'll understand how to combat it!" Beckett countered irritably.

"Gentlemen!"

They both turned to look at Caldwell.

"Less arguing, more progress please?"

"We're working on it, Colonel." McKay shot back.

"Work faster. We running this city on a skeleton crew, and that's not going to be good if the Wraith come knocking at the door," he reminded them.

Weir stepped forward. "Couldn't we go down to the holding cells and start zatting men back to their...senses?"

Beckett shook his head negatively. "I wouldn't recommend it, Elizabeth. There are some men who might not survive even a single blast from that thing... Best to find another way."

"Then do it, Doctor, or I will have to send Sheppard and Devane down there to zat them regardless." Caldwell warned before stalking out of the room.

Logan watched him go, sensing the anger and guilt he hid beneath the exterior. Despite her words to the contrary, he still blamed himself. She would make a point of pinning him down, once all of this was over, to have another conversation with him about it. A sudden movement out on the balcony caught her attention. John. She slipped quietly outside to join him.

"Hey," she murmured softly.

"Hi Sparks." His voice sounded flat.

"We'll figure it out, John."

"I know. I'm not worried about that."

"What are you worried about?"

"You don't really have to ask, do you?"

"No, not really. You can't blame yourself, John. In fact, you fought it better and longer than anyone else here."

"Not hard enough, it would seem."

She took him by the shoulders and looked him in the eye. "Are you _kidding_ me? You stopped yourself, right in the...heat...of it...Even when you were under the influence of whatever this thing is... I knew you would never hurt me, and you proved me right."

"That didn't stop me from getting out of line with you," he clenched his jaw as he looked down at her. The pain in his eyes was excruciating.

"That wasn't you. And you didn't hurt me. Besides, it's not like you've never kissed me before!" she teased.

"Please! We were fourteen! And that was your idea!" he reminded her. "This was... not the same... at _all_."

"I know. Who better to give me my first kiss than my best friend? We both wanted to see what the big deal was anyway. My point is, under the influence of this thing, you could have gotten WAY out of line, and it still wouldn't be your fault. So drop it?"

He turned away for a moment, then shook his head as his eyes found hers again. It was true. She didn't blame him at all. He nodded his head, all the while thanking his lucky stars that things hadn't gotten out of hand.

"You know what, though?"

"What?"

"There are more than a few women around here who were actually wishing that you'd approached _them_ while you were under the influence."

"Yeah, right!" he chuckled.

"No seriously. I heard them talking in the lab earlier. They were talking about how THEY would never have turned you down. They were...  
uh...quite descriptive...about what they wanted to do to you."

"Hah! Sure they were..." he swatted her playfully on the backside and walked back inside.

TWO HOURS LATER

"It takes a pretty hefty shock to kill it off, but not as heavy as a blast from a zat weapon. It'll be enough to knock them all off their feet, but not enough to do any permanent harm."

"Do it." Caldwell ordered.

Sheppard, Logan, Weir, Caldwell, Beckett, Teyla and Ronon stood and watched as McKay finished adjusting the circuits and gave the signal.  
A moment later, a bright light flared within the cell and all twenty men inside gasped and fell to the floor. They were all immediately back on their feet again, shaken, but back to their senses once more.

Weir moved closer to the bars, just to test them and see if any of the men were still suffering the effects of the contagion. When no one made a single crude remark, Caldwell stepped forward. Sgt. Hahn was the first one to speak.

"Sir? What happened?"

Caldwell fixed him with one of his trademark glares that left little doubt in one's mind that they were about to receive a royal ass-chewing.

"We'll discuss that later, Sergeant."

He left Sheppard and Logan with strict instructions to supervise while McKay and Beckkett proceeded to cure the remaining men, then excused himself, taking Weir and Teyla with him.

When it was all over, Logan was finally free to go back to her quarters and relax for the first time in over twenty four hours. She showered and changed. But after fifteen minutes of tossing and turning in her bed, she gave up and headed down the hall to Sheppard's quarters. He was sitting up, trying to read a book when she came in.

"Couldn't sleep?" he arched an eyebrow at her knowingly.

"Nope."

He pushed back the covers and patted the bed next to him. "Come on."

She slipped in beside him and pulled the covers up to her chin as she nestled close to his body.

"You sure you can trust me?" he snarked.

Logan yawned and elbowed him in the ribs. "I may be compact, but I can still take you," she shot back.

A moment later, she was out cold. Sheppard wrapped his arms around her, pulled her a little closer, and promptly drifted off to sleep as well.


	7. Chapter 7

Logan waited while Beckett ran every test he could think of on the blood sample she'd given him, pacing back and forth around the room, trying to wait patiently for the results. All of the men had been cured, but there was no guarantee that they couldn't or _wouldn't_ be re-infected. Every female in the city had to be tested to make sure they wouldn't start the whole thing all over again.

"Well...I see no sign of the contagion, so it looks like our theory was correct. It does wear off after a while. As long as you ladies don't come into contact with any of those pretty flowers again, we should all be just fine."

"Great!" she chirped happily. "Thank you, Carson."

"You're welcome, love. Now get outta here before you wear a hole in my floor!" he teased.

"Yes, doctor! Are you going to tell Colonel Caldwell and Dr. Weir, or should I?"

"I'll take care of it," he assured her.

LATER THAT DAY

After arriving back home, following a rather trying mission, Sheppard spent the better part of an hour loking for Logan. He hadn't even thought to check the gym, but that was where he found her. She was there with about fifteen Athosian children, Teyla and Weir. They were, to his amusement, teaching the children how to dance - Earth style. He stifled a chuckle as strains of The B-52's "Love Shack" poured out of the speakers.

Logan rarely had the opportunity to be silly, so he didn't want to spoil anything by revealing his presence. He stood back, behind a pillar, and watched them dancing and clowning and simply enjoying life. He suspected, by one look at Jinto's face, that the young boy had developed quite a crush on Logan. He cringed, inwardly. The boy was doomed to learn about heartbreak early. Little did he know that no woman would ever quite be able to measure up to the woman he was dancing with now.

The music changed to a ballad. Some ridiculously sentimental boy-band tune he didn't know the title to. Jinto valiantly tried to lead Logan in a slow dance, but he kept stepping on her toes. By this time, Teyla had discovered his hiding place and waved him over. Logan smiled happily at him as he drew closer, pleading with her eyes to be "saved."

"Excuse me, Jinto. Let an old guy show you how it's done," he said.

Jinto looked a little relieved and moved quickly out of the way as Sheppard stepped in and pulled Logan close.

"I have to get back to the control room," announced Weir.

"As do I. I will see you soon, children." Teyla followed Weir out the door, leaving Sheppard and Logan to entertain the children.

"If I didn't know better, I'd think they planned that," whispered Logan.

"Me too," Sheppard nodded, though not bothered. " How long are we watching the tykes?"

"Not long now," she shrugged. "Just _dance_ , flyboy, they seem to be enjoying this."

"Try to keep up, Sparky," he laughed as he spun her around the floor, then dipped her low to the ground.

Twenty minutes later, they felt a new pair of eyes watching them. Joram and his sister Kitah had arrived to escort the children back to the mainland. Sheppard and Logan helped them round up the children, despite many protests and herd them to the jumper bay. On the way there, Sheppard couldn't help but notice the look on Joram's face. He was staring intently at Logan. It didn't surprise him that the man had taken notice of her, Logan was a real stunner, and often had that effect on males in general. But there was something about the _way_ he was looking at her that set his back up, though he couldn't quite put his finger on it. He watched until both jumpers had safely taken off before the feeling began to dissipate. He'd have to keep an eye on that one.

Inside the jumper, Joram continued to stare blankly ahead. The earth woman, Logan. She was not at all what he'd expected. He'd been told she was beautiful, but for some reason he'd expected her, as a warrior, to be cold and remote. She was neither. Far from it. He closed his eyes and pictured her dancing around the room with Sheppard and the children. Her hair had come free from its binding and flowed like silk down past her shoulders. Her laughter was infectious, almost musical. The children clearly adored her. _This_ was a warrior? She looked more like a siren. He'd been sent to Atlantis to find her, and now that he had, he was no longer sure what to do.

WEEKS LATER

Caldwell stood at the banks of a gently flowing river on PRX-331 and took in his surroundings. He had to wonder why anyone would voluntarily leave a planet so beautiful and fertile. They'd been back and forth to 331 three times in the past week and had yet to find another human anywhere. Even scans done from the air had yielded no trace of human life.

It didn't make sense. If the Wraith had come, there would have been signs of their passing. As it was, this place looked completely untouched, by humans or Wraith. But, despite the peace and beauty of the planet, something didn't sit well with him. It was too perfect. Too serene. Too tempting. A trap? He couldn't be sure, but he would be cautious. If he was wrong, this would be an ideal world for a new Alpha-Site, but if he was right...

"Colonel?"

Logan stepped up beside him and gazed down into the river. "Soul searching, sir?"

Caldwell chuckled. "No, just thinking."

"Too good to be true?"

"Yeah. Something like that. What do you think?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

Logan shrugged and turned to look around her. "I dunno, sir. I've always believed that if something seems to good to be true, it usually is. But we haven't found any signs of life, human, wraith or what have you. Not even any of those weird space bugs. Nothing beyond plant life. There aren't any houses or buildings, or even remnants of those. It's pretty...odd..."

Caldwell nodded. "I was thinking the same thing. Before we make any plans to claim the planet as our alpha-site, we better go over this place with a fine-tooth comb."

"I agree." She looked up at him and flashed a brilliant smile as she studied his face. "Nice to get out of the office, sir?"

He couldn't help but grin. "Yep! I never get out to the mainland, I'm always either stuck in Atlantis or on the Daedalus, so this is a real treat for me."

"Good," she chirped. "I was hoping you'd have some fun."

"Colonel..." the abrupt radio call was cut off.

"Who was that?" Caldwell asked.

"I'm not sure, sir... Evans maybe?" her eyes began to scan the terrain around them.

Caldwell keyed his radio mike, "Sgt. Evans?"

No response.

Logan tried as well. "Sgt. Evans, respond."

Still no response.

"I knew it!" Caldwell's voice hardened. "Round them up, Devane!"

Both Logan and Caldwell were already running and shouting orders to the others. Of the twelve people who'd come here, only nine were accounted for, including Caldwell and Logan. They still hadn't located any source of any threat, yet three of their team had inexplicably gone missing. Logan checked and re-checked the life signs detector she always carried, but it was still reading only the nine of them.

Exasperated, she looked over at Caldwell. "I think we're gonna need Rodney or Zelenka here to figure this out, sir."

"More than likely, but I don't want to put anyone else in danger. We don't even know what happened," Caldwell told her.

"Standard recon formation, sir?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

Caldwell thought about it for a moment, then shook his head negatively. "Not this time. This feels more like a divide and conquer thing to me. We were fine until everyone began going off in different directions. I think we're better off sticking together."

"Make them come after all of us, instead of picking us off one by one?"

"Yeah well, I don't plan on letting anyone else get picked off, how about you?" he grunted.

"Nope. Where do you want to start?"

Caldwell scanned the immediate area, then took out his mini-telescope to scan the farther countryside. "Where was Evans the last time anyone saw him?"

Ferretti raised his hand, "Over near that stand of trees, sir," pointing toward the trees about 50 yards to the east of their current position.

"Okay, what about Stein and Roberts?" Caldwell asked.

"About 20 yards from Evans, sir," offered Dawson.

"That's an awful lot of cover for an enemy to hide in," Logan pointed out.

Caldwell nodded. "Yes it is..." he looked down at the life signs detector she was still holding. "Still nothing?"

She held it up for him to see. "Not one blip."

"Well, we can't just stay here, and we're sure as hell not leaving our people behind. We have to go in," he looked at Logan as he said this, determination and anger flashing in his eyes.

"Right there with you, sir," she replied without flinching.

"Alright then, we go. Stay together. Keep the person in front of you within sight at all times, no one moves off on their own. Stay low, stay tight. Everyone ready?"

Eight heads bobbed simultaneously in affirmation as Caldwell met each pair of eyes.

"Move out," ordered Logan.

The group cautiously made its way toward the stand of trees without incident. No one saw or heard anything that might signal an attack or even a threat. Logan's senses were screaming that something was very wrong, but she still couldn't put her finger on it. It was as if the three men had simply vanished... Then it hit her, there had been another world where their expedition had come across a hidden threat...

"Sir!" she whispered harshly.

Caldwell silently inched toward her.

"Maybe we can't sense them up here, because they're...

Suddenly the ground seemed to explode beneath them from all around. Boulders pushed aside and holes appeared to open up in the ground out of nowhere. Armed, uniformed men sprang up and surrounded them before they could react. A trap indeed. Logan cursed herself for not thinking of this sooner, then looked mournfully up at Caldwell.

"Genii," she muttered through clenched teeth.

Caldwell's jaw tightened as he turned to the man, who appeared to be their leader, striding purposefully toward them.

"Gentlemen, and lady, we're pleased you could join us." he smirked.

"Nobody just sends engraved invitations anymore," Caldwell snarked.

"Downright rude, sir." chimed in Logan.

"Amusing," snorted the Genii leader. "You appear to be outnumbered, my Lantean friends, by at least four to one. I must insist that you relinquish your weapons and follow me."

"Follow you where?" Caldwell fixed him with an icy stare.

"To our headquarters, of course," he replied unhelpfully.

Caldwell arched an eyebrow, "And if we are disinclined to accept your invitation?"

"Do not make the mistake of assuming that my civility extends beyond my initial request. I would just as soon kill every last one of you and be done with it. So, if you do not drop your weapons, and come along quietly, I will have your people shot, one by one, right in front of you," he sneered.

Caldwell's eyes turned steely as he measured the man standing before them. The Genii's eyes were cold, soulless. Caldwell didn't doubt for a moment that he would do exactly as he threatened. They _were_ greatly outnumbered, and he simply could not risk the lives of his people in a pissing match with the Genii.

"What about the three men you already have? Are they still alive?" Caldwell demanded.

"Very much so, and resting comfortably. They, as well as these here, will remain so, as long as you do what you're told."

Caldwell's jaw tightened again and he turned to look each one of his people in the eye again. "Do it," he ordered.

Logan knew how much that had cost him. She also knew that he really had no choice. "You heard the Colonel, men, drop them and step back," she commanded.

"Excellent. Now, you may call me Commander Kolya..." he stopped at Logan's gasp of recognition.

" _Acastus_ Kolya?" she asked.

"Close. My name is _Jerud_ Kolya. Acastus is my brother," he smiled. "And you..." he moved to stand in front of Logan. "You _must_ be Logan Devane."

She met his glare without flinching, but her mind was racing a mile a minute. She'd never had any dealings with the Genii, but she knew everything about Sheppard's encounters with them. She knew that Acastus Kolya, in particular, hated Sheppard. She also had to wonder how the Genii had gotten her name.

"If I must, I must," she sighed.

He turned back to Caldwell. "And you are...?" he asked.

"Colonel Steven Caldwell," he replied grudgingly.

"Indeed?" he clapped his hands together in delight. "Well, we are fortunate then, aren't we, to have netted the leader of all the Lanteans?"

They certainly had a good source of information.

"This is a pleasant, albeit unexpected surprise... Come!" he motioned to the group.

Logan looked to Caldwell, who nodded, before following Kolya to the entrance of their underground complex..

She paced the floor of her cell impatiently. Much to the chagrin of her team and Colonel Caldwell, they had placed her separately from the others. Fearful of what they had in mind for her, Caldwell had lashed out at Kolya, prompting the other men to fight as well. All it gained them, however were a few concussions, bruises and some cracked ribs. Caldwell himself had taken a nasty blow to the head after decking Kolya. It had taken Logan several agonizing minutes to calm her men and get them to stop fighting their captors.

She'd even pleaded with Kolya to allow her to help her injured team members, but he'd politely refused. He did, however, promise to get them some medical help, not that she believed him. If he was anything like his brother, he would simply let them die. He wouldn't give her any reason for isolating her from the others either, but she had the distinct impression she was being used as bait. Something that didn't sit well with her at all. And if that were the case, she knew who it was they hoped to reel in: John Sheppard. She was infinitely grateful that he hadn't been with them on this recon, but she knew it was only a matter of time before he'd show up. The minute she was overdue, he'd be chomping at the bit to come after them.

After what seemed like hours, Kolya finally deigned to see her.

"I trust you are comfortable?" he sneered.

"Hardly," she said evenly.

Kolya looked at the amenities the Genii had put in her cell. "No? Your accommodations are much nicer than those of your team."

"And why is that, exactly?" she eyed him suspiciously.

He smiled, "I believe women should be treated properly."

"Taking them hostage, is proper?" she scoffed.

"Consider yourself a prisoner of war," he shrugged.

"Like Sora was?"

His eyes narrowed and his smile faded. "Shall we do to you what you did to Sora?"

"My people treated her with the utmost respect and dignity."

"Indeed. so much so that she now sympathizes with your people to the point of campaigning for cooperation between our two peoples, he informed her, indignation written all over his face.

"Then she is a lot smarter than the rest of you," she replied.

"Do not try my patience, Colonel Devane. You may be a woman, but you are also a warrior, and as such, subject to the consequences of your actions," he warned.

"Let's just cut to the chase, Commander Kolya. You targeted me for a reason, a reason other than the fact that I'm Lantean. I'd like to know what it is you have planned for me," she arched an eyebrow at him.

Kolya smiled darkly. "I wouldn't be too sure of that if I were you, but I will tell you this much: You are not the ultimate target."

"That much I know," she sighed.

"Do you now? And who is it you think I want?" he was almost daring her to say it.

"You tell me."

"Coy doesn't become you, Colonel, but I'll play along," he nodded. "I want John Sheppard."

"Who doesn't?" she smiled sweetly.

"Oh, I'm quite sure he's made enemies all over the galaxy by now."

Logan shrugged and shook her head negatively. "Nope, aside from the Wraith, you guys are the only ones who hate him."

"I highly doubt that," he snorted.

"Doubt it all you want, but Colonel Sheppard has done more to help the people in this galaxy than your whole population combined," she countered.

Kolya laughed. "Since he is single-handedly responsible for waking the Wraith in the first place, I'd say that doesn't even begin to make up for it."

"There is one fundamental difference between our two people's, Commander. We CARE about other human beings, whereas you don't care about anyone other than those on your own planet. Where is your humanity? Your compassion?"

"You know nothing of life under siege from the Wraith!" he growled.

"I may not have lived here all my life, but that doesn't mean I can't feel for everyone who came before me, and who will come after me. We could have turned tail and left this galaxy a long time ago, but we stayed. We stayed to do everything we could to defeat the Wraith and protect the humans in this galaxy. Life in this galaxy CAME from my home world, thousands of years ago. These humans ARE my people, even the Genii..." Logan trailed off and took a deep breath.

Sheppard had been right, not that she'd ever doubted him. These people were immovable. Nothing mattered to them but their own people. And probably not even them, if push came to shove.

"You are very passionate, Colonel Devane, but you don't think for a moment that I believe a word you say, do you?"

She looked up at him and shrugged again. "Nope. That would mean that you have half a brain and a modicum of common sense."

He feigned hurt at that. "Was that meant to wound me, Colonel?"

"Certainly not, Commander, you'd also have to have a heart for me to hurt you that way."

"Indeed!" He turned and began pacing back and forth. "Well now, you want to know what my plans for you are, correct?"

Logan nodded.

"We've established that you are the lure to get Colonel Sheppard...You must remind me to congratulate him on his promotion, by the way... What you don't know, is that we intend to inflict as much pain and suffering upon him as we possibly can."

"I see," she murmured, expecting as much. "It's not enough _just_ to kill him, right?"

"Precisely. Sheppard humiliated my brother, not once but twice. Acastus was forced to give up his rank and position within the government. I don't intend to let that stand," he informed her.

"Oh please! _Grow up_!" she barked at him.

"I take slights to my family very seriously, Colonel Devane. I do not, by any means, wish my brother dead, but it would have been a kinder fate than the one he was served following his last encounter with Sheppard."

"Colonel Sheppard spared his life, for crying out loud. He could have killed him for what he did to my people. He spared him to show YOUR people that we VALUE human life, even yours. To make an overture of peace, not to humiliate him," she seethed.

"Clearly you do not understand our ways," he shook his head at her.

"Clearly," she agreed.

"It's not likely that you ever will," he added.

"Maybe, maybe not. _You_ aren't likely to give us a chance to understand, though, are you?" she asked, already knowing the answer.

"We have no use for you," he said simply.

"Except as bait," she corrected him.

"Right! Now, knowing Colonel Sheppard, what is the one thing we could use to hurt him the most?" he asked.

"Like I would tell you?" she snorted.

"You really don't have to, we _have_ done our homework. Sheppard values his friends, his people, above all else. And who does he value most of all?" he looked at her expectantly.

Her eyes never left his for a moment. She knew exactly where he was going with this. She'd heard about the vast network of spies the Genii had cultivated, but surely no one in Atlantis would conspire with them. How did he know so much about her?

"You. More than anyone else, he values _you_ , Colonel Devane. And you will be the instrument that finally leads to his downfall. Just having you here is likely to inflict great pain, but imagine, for a moment, how much it would hurt him to know that you have been hurt in his stead? The guilt and the grief will eat away at him for a long, long time before I finally take his life and end his suffering."

"So...torture, then. You're going to torture me to get to him," she deduced.

"There are many forms of torture, my dear Colonel. For you, simply being held prisoner is a form of torture you are familiar with..."

Logan cursed inwardly. He had a damn good source of information. She continued to meet his gaze evenly and managed not to flinch.

"There is also physical pain. Emotional pain... A woman, such as yourself... You must have considered the possibilities if you were to be taken prisoner by an enemy."

"Possibilities?"

"You are indeed very beautiful. I'd been told as much, but the description didn't even do you justice," he eyed her appreciatively, making her skin crawl.

"Am I supposed to be flattered?"

"These men out here, my men...they have been without the company of any woman, much less a beautiful woman such as yourself, for a very long time..." he trailed off to give her a moment to think about what he meant.

"You mean to give me to them." she began to feel queasy but wouldn't give him the satisfaction of letting it show.

"Can you think of anything more painful for a man like Sheppard to have to deal with?" he asked, all but drooling at the prospect.

"So much for treating a woman with respect," she snorted.

Kolya chuckled in amusement. "As I said, you are also a warrior."

He stopped pacing long enough to study her face, before his eyes dipped lower to examine every inch of her frame again. She felt sick to her stomach but forced herself, again, not to react.

"You are very brave. I almost feel some...regret...at having to do this to you," he told her.

"I'm sure," she snarked.

"Careful, you might charm me into partaking in the...fun..." he warned.

"You weren't planning on it all along?" she rolled her eyes at him.

"Not until now." he leered.

"You do realize that if I don't manage to kill you myself, Colonel Sheppard will?"

Kolya laughed riotously at that. "If it comforts you to believe that, then by all means, delude yourself further!"

Without another word, he turned on his heel and strode out of the cell, shutting the door behind him. Logan did her best to maintain her composure and quell her queasy stomach. The thought of what they had planned sent shudders down her spine. Still, she wasn't as concerned for herself as she was for Sheppard. Logan shook her head and forced herself to relax. She had to think. She had to find a way out of this before they could do anything to her or anyone else. Before she had time to think further, the door opened again and a familiar figure walked into the room.

"Joram?" she stared at him in confusion.


	8. Chapter 8

Logan stared at Joram incredulously. "What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I've come for you," he whispered.

"Come for me? What? How did you get past the guards..." she trailed off as it hit her.

 _He_ was Kolya's source. As an Athosian, and a regular visitor to Atlantis, he would, of course, be privvy to all sorts of information. How could she have missed that?

He could see that she had guessed his role in recent events as her facial expression turned stony.

"I agreed to help them long before I met you," he informed her.

"Why?" she demanded.

"For the same reason as Kolya, to avenge my brother."

Logan stared at him coldly. "I don't even know your brother!"

"Colonel Sheppard did," he hissed, hate in his eyes.

"What happened to him?" she demanded.

"Colonel Sheppard _failed_ to rescue him along with the other Athosians, when they were taken from Athos shortly after his arrival there," he complained.

"So you blame _him_?" she barked. "In case you've forgotten, we lost one of our own men that day as well. And it eats away at Colonel Sheppard every. single. day!"

"That's not good enough!" he shouted.

"If it weren't for him, none of those people would still be alive! You have him to thank for bringing back Halling and Teyla and the others!" she reminded him.

"If it weren't for _him_ , my people, including my brother, would not have been taken in the first place! Sheppard brought the Wraith to my world that day, and because of _him_ I lost my brother AND my home!"

"How unfair can you be?!" She was livid now. "That man we lost, that soldier was our Superior. Colonel Sheppard was following orders when he set foot on your planet, how can you blame _him_?"

"He carries the germ."

"I think you mean 'gene.' And," she arched an eyebrow at him. "... he's not the only one."

"He is responsible," he repeated.

"So you align yourself with the Genii? Who would just as soon take over Atlantis themselves, or worse, see it fall to the Wraith? You think the Genii give a damn about you or your people? They would serve you up to the Wraith to save themselves so fast it would make your head spin. They would kill every person in Atlantis without a second thought... _These_ are the people you choose to align yourself with? Believe me, Joram, you are not honoring your brother by doing this."

"You are wrong," he countered.

He was so calm it infuriated her. "No, YOU'RE wrong, Joram. _You_ are hurting alot of innocent people, and for what?! Revenge? _Shame_ on you."

"The shame is on _Sheppard_ ," he hissed.

"NO! YOU did this. Why couldn't you be a man and take it up with Colonel Sheppard, face to face? Instead, you have to sneak around and make foolish alliances with people who will more than likely end up killing YOU when you are of no use to them anymore. They are going to kill my entire team, either before or after they're done with me..."

"No!" his raised voice cut her off.

"No, what?"

"They will not touch you."

"Think again, genius. Kolya told me exactly what they have planned for me," she informed him.

"In the beginning, I agreed with their plan, but..."

"You AGREED?!" she barked. "You have a SISTER, Joram. How would you like someone to use her that way?"

"Don't say that!" he cried out in disgust.

"Why not? Because it's _ugly_ and _degrading_? Well, _that_ is the fate you had planned for me..." she seethed.

"Only in the beginning...Before I met you...Now I will not allow them to touch you," he asserted.

Logan laughed in spite of herself. This was ridiculous! "And how do you plan to _stop_ them?"

"I've come to get you out of here," he replied.

"How?" she chuckled.

"It can be done," he assured her.

"Well, I'm not going without my team," she told him, her tone brooking no argument.

"I do not _care_ what happens to them!" he said dismissively.

"Well, I DO! And I'm not leaving them, no matter what! Haven't you learned by now that WE DON'T LEAVE OUR PEOPLE BEHIND! It's just one of the things that separates us from the Genii!"

Joram studied her for a moment. He'd expected her to be angry, but he'd also expected her to jump at the chance for freedom.

"I mean it, Joram. I will not leave here without my people," she repeated herself.

"I am saddened to hear you say that you will not come willingly," he murmured.

In a flash, he pulled out a tiny, wooden dart, and jammed the point into her shoulder. She landed one firm blow squarely to his nose. Unfortunately, she sank to the floor right along with him. Whatever had been in that dart, it was powerful enough to render her unconscious within seconds. Joram was only slightly more fortunate. Blood was streaming from his now broken nose. He tore off his sleeve and used it to stem the flow before gathering up the unconscious Logan into his arms. As he turned to leave, the door flew open and Kolya walked into the room.

"Joram, my friend, what are you trying to do?" he asked, knowing precisely what he was doing.

"She was promised to me, Jerud, as payment for my help," Joram reminded him.

Kolya eyed him coldly. "Sheppard has not yet been captured, Joram. We still need her."

Joram's eyes flashed angrily. "I know what you are planning to do to her..."

Kolya held up a hand, cutting him off, "Something you agreed to."

"And you agreed to turn her over to me instead!" he argued.

Kolya smiled, "A mistake on my part, my friend. We go with the original plan."

He studied Logan's face, beautiful and relaxed in her unconscious state. He could hardly blame Joram for becoming enamored with the woman. She had fire as well as beauty, two qualities he admired greatly himself. "What have you done to her, Joram?"

Joram looked down at the woman in his arms. "She would not come...willingly. I had to administer a sleeping draught I concocted."

"Indeed? You must share the formula for this draught with your Genii friends, Joram. But for now, please put the woman down on the cot over there. I assume she will just sleep it off?"

Joram stared at Kolya defiantly. "You must not hurt her, Jerud."

"I have no intention of damaging her, my friend. It is imperative that she remain in good condition, if she is to be used to lure John Sheppard here."

Joram hesitated a moment longer, then finally moved over to the cot in the corner and placed her gently on top. Pulling a blanket up around her, he stared longingly at her beautiful face before turning back to face Kolya. "You must promise me that she will not be hurt."

Kolya smiled again. A smile that did not quite reach his eyes. "You have my word. Now, if you don't mind, my men will show you out." He stepped aside to allow Joram to exit with the three Genii guards he brought with him. After they left, Kolya walked over to the cot to stare down at the sleeping form under the blanket.

"It is a shame really," he whispered. "You are indeed _very_ lovely. But I cannot let that interfere with my plans for Sheppard."

He reached down to brush a strand of hair from her face, and then let his hand trail down her cheek. Her skin was soft and warm and he had to fight the sudden impulse to sample the taste of her lips, then forced himself to leave the room before he could give in to his baser instincts.

Caldwell paced back and forth across the cell floor. His head was pounding ferociously and his anger was nearing the boiling point. He held no illusions about what they had in store for Logan, but he knew he would do anything he could to stop them. His men, too, were becoming more restless by the minute. He'd already warned them to control and focus their increasing anger so they could all make it out of there in one piece. All of them. Together.

They all turned in unison at the sound of the door latch being released. Caldwell's jaw tightened as Kolya entered, along with six other Genii soldiers. He fixed his icy glare on Kolya as he came to stand before him.

"I trust you're feeling better?"

"Peachy," snarled Caldwell.

"Good... I suppose. I'm sure you're wondering about Colonel Devane?" Kolya asked.

"Of course."

"She is well...for now," his tone was taunting.

Caldwell's eyes got even colder. "For now?"

"Yes. You are aware that all of you, but especially Colonel Devane, are simply the bait to lure out our real target?"

Caldwell nodded. "Sheppard."

"Indeed. Colonel Sheppard has been a thorn in our collective sides since he first set foot in this galaxy. Now, it is time for him to pay, and pay dearly," Kolya informed them.

Caldwell snorted. "A _real_ man would have gone after him, face-to-face, instead of hiding behind hostages to lure him out. All you would have had to do is extend the invitation and I'm sure Colonel Sheppard would have met you any time you wanted."

"But, that is precisely what I've done. This IS my invitation to Sheppard. All of you here, with yourself as an exception Colonel Caldwell, will serve as a dagger to his heart as we execute you one by one. And Colonel Devane? She will be the most excruciating blow of all." Kolya signaled to a man out in the hall, who appeared with a clear plastic container.

"I trust you recognize this?" he held out the container for all of them to see.

What they saw sent chills down their spines. The delicate azalea-like blossoms seemed almost to taunt them.

"You have no idea what those are." Caldwell said, unconsciously taking a step backwards.

"On the contrary, I'm perfectly aware of their intoxicating effects. I was going to allow my men to...appreciate those effects, but I do believe, now, that it would be more fitting to let you and your men rediscover their power. Once you have all partaken, you will be reunited with your Colonel Devane, and _then_ , we shall let nature take its course."

MOMENTS LATER

Weir sat at the console trying to digest the information before her. She jumped about a foot when Sheppard burst into the room and flopped down in the chair next to her.

"Colonel?!" she snapped.

"Sorry. Any word from Colonel Caldwell or Colonel Devane?"

Weir checked her watch, then re-checked, her brow furrowing. "No, not a word. They're only ten minutes late..." she trailed off, knowing full well that neither Colonel Caldwell or Devane would report late unless something was wrong.

"We need to go check on them," Sheppard immediately got to his feet.

Weir knew he was right, but if something was wrong, she wanted them to be prepared. "Let's try to establish radio contact first, shall we?"

Sheppard's eyes hardened. "And then we go in," he said, already half way out the door.

Weir nodded affirmatively. She knew better than to try and hold Sheppard back when it came to the safety of their SG Teams, particularly when it came to Logan Devane. She knew that he cared deeply about the others, as well, but Logan was first and foremost among them.

McKay, Teyla and Ronon were already waiting in the control room when she arrived. Weir shot Sheppard a glance as she approached. "You've already gathered your team?"

He shrugged, "No, they came on their own."

Weir motioned to Lt. Goodman, "Lieutenant, dial the gate and try to establish radio contact with Colonels' Caldwell and Devane."

"Yes ma'am."

They waited for the gate to open and Goodman to try and hail them.

"No response, Doctor Weir."

"Open a channel for me," she nodded.

"Ready."

"Colonel Caldwell, Colonel Devane, this is Doctor Weir, please respond?" she called out.

They all waited with growing dread. They knew now that something was horribly wrong, but what they did not and could not know was that Jerud Kolya was listening on the other side. He didn't want Sheppard to know, just yet, what threat it was he was facing. He wanted to see Sheppard's face when he learned who it was that had taken his people. He knew that, though Weir was the one doing the talking, Sheppard would be right there listening.

"That planet was vacant every time we went there, what could possibly have happened to them?" McKay murmured, not quite to himself.

Ronon cleared his throat uneasily, "Wraith?"

"It's always a possibility," Weir replied before shifting her gaze to Sheppard. "Colonel, you have a go. Bring our people home."

"I will," he promised, as much to himself as to Weir.

Kolya tried to refrain from smiling at the unspoken reaction of Caldwell and his team as they listened to Weir's radio call as well as the look of horror at the sight of the beautiful but dangerous blossoms his men held. They clearly did not relish reliving the effects of the blossoms and he couldn't really blame them, no one would enjoy such loss of control over one's own will.

"Your people will be affected as well, Kolya," Caldwell warned.

"We've taken certain precautions."

Caldwell shook his head. "Look, we don't even know for sure exactly how the contagion spreads, how could you possibly take all the necessary precautions. Once this thing gets out, you won't be able to contain it."

"Even if that is true, your Colonel Devane is the ONLY woman on this planet..." he let the implications of that process in Caldwell's mind.

"You sick freak!" Caldwell shouted.

Kolya laughed out loud, more than a little happy about the pain and suffering he was about to inflict.

"What about when _your_ men are completely taken over by this?!" Caldwell demanded. "Do you think you'll be able to keep them from going through the gate to find other women? You won't!"

"You needn't concern yourself with that, Colonel." Kolya turned on his heel and moved toward the door. When all the other men had gone, Caldwell called out to him.

"Kolya!"

Kolya looked over his shoulder at him.

"You're making a huge mistake."

Caldwell watched as Kolya motioned his people out of the room and held up the container holding the fragile blossoms. He waited, giving his men more time to get further away from the door before he reached into his pocket, pulled out a plastic mask, and placed it over his mouth and nose. He smiled grimly as the Lanteans physically braced themselves against the blossoms influence. In one smooth movement, Kolya ripped the lid off the container and tossed the fragrant blossoms toward the Lanteans. For another breathless moment time seemed to stand still.

Suddenly, Caldwell lunged at Kolya, effortlessly tackling him to the floor. He was bigger and stronger than Kolya, with cat-like reflexes, and he easily subdued the man before he could shout for his guards. "Where _is_ she?" Caldwell demanded icily.

"I'll never tell," he chokingly responded.

"I will snap your neck if anything has happened to her!" Caldwell swore.

The sound of approaching footsteps, running, came from down the hall and interrupted them. The Lanteans immediately took up offensive positions and charged down the hall to confront the approaching Genii.

In her room, Logan was waking groggily. She could hear the sounds of a struggle down the hall, but couldn't seem to get her legs to hold her as she tried to stand. Shakily pulling herself up, she weaved her way toward the door, alternately walking and stumbling. She couldn't see anything from the tiny window in the door, and the persistent buzzing in her head was making her dizzy. She stumbled over to the wash basin and splashed cold water on her face, hoping to clear her head a little. She was caught off guard, and off balance, when the door suddenly opened and she wheeled around to see who it was. A single Genii soldier.

Without a word, she lunged at him, using her full body weight to crash him into the wall. He was so stunned by her sudden attack that he didn't have time to react, something she was counting on. The initial blow knocked the wind out of him, allowing her to get the upper hand. She continued to rain blows on him until he slumped, unconscious, to the floor. Wild with fear and anger, Logan grabbed the Genii's gun and stumbled out into the hall. In her diminished state, she took a wrong turn and began moving away from her fellow Lanteans, who were ferociously fighting to get to her.

The Genii turned out to be no match for the enraged Lanteans, and they began to fall, one by one, despite their superior numbers. So ferocious was the fighting, that no one noticed Kolya escaping at the other end of the hall. A hidden door led him up to a passage way to the surface, where he encountered a very off-balance Logan Devane.

Her eyes narrowed as she took in the form that appeared suddenly out of the trap door before her. "Kolya," she seethed.

"Colonel! Aren't you resourceful?" he backed away from her only slightly.

Logan raised her weapon at him, wishing that she could figure out which of the three of him was the real Kolya.

"Where are my men?" she demanded.

"They are still underground, and you are still alone."

"Just me and my little friend here," she quipped, indicating the gun she held.

Kolya's radio blared to life. "Sir, Colonel Sheppard has just come through the gate!"

"Now the fun begins," Kolya chuckled.

"I won't let you hurt him," she seethed.

"How do you plan to stop me?" he taunted.

Before she could answer, the blurry form of Kolya was attacked by another blurry form and driven to the ground.

"NOOOO!"

Logan watched in confusion as a crazed Joram began pummeling the Genii within an inch of his life. Logan looked around to see if any of her people were near yet. Her stomach was getting ever more rebellious, and the dizziness was getting worse. Unable to stand upright any longer, she slumped to her knees and called out. "John!"

Her voice cracked with the effort and all she could manage was a faint squawk. The darkness was threatening to overwhelm her again, and she couldn't fight when Joram, finished now with Kolya, grabbed her and lifted her off her feet. Logan feebly batted at him as he threw her over his shoulder and began to run. Neither of them saw Sheppard and McKay appear over the rise about 50 yards to their rear.

"What the hell?"

Sheppard stopped long enough to make sure that it was, indeed, Logan who was being carried over the fleeing man's shoulder, before giving chase. Both he and McKay gave only fleeting glances to the bloodied man lying on the ground as they passed. Sheppard noted that he looked somewhat familiar, but he was more concerned about catching up to whoever it was that had Logan.

"Why isn't she fighting?" asked McKay breathlessly.

Sheppard shook his head. "She must be unconscious, or she would be fighting," he replied.

McKay finally remembered the others and slowed down to key his mike. "Teyla, Ronon...We're in pursuit of... _someone_...he's got Colonel Devane... We're approximately 200 yards south of the gate..."

Kolya opened his eyes and forced himself to a sitting position just in time to see Sheppard and McKay disappear over a rise about 30 yards from where he was. He dragged himself to his feet, checked to make sure he still had his weapon and began following them.

Inside the bunker, Caldwell and his men had subdued or killed every last one of the Genii, but they still hadn't found Logan. Caldwell began checking every door until he finally found one that led to the surface.

"Logan!" Sheppard called out, closing the distance between him and his prey.

Joram wheeled around and fired at both McKay and Sheppard, causing them to dive out of the way.

"That was..."

"Joram?" Sheppard finished for McKay. "What the hell does he think he's doing?"

"He's firing a gun at us, that's what he's doing!" snapped McKay.

"I mean with _Logan_ , McKay!" Sheppard snapped back.

"Oh...I have no idea..."

They waited for Joram to turn and begin running again. Sheppard could see that Logan was trying to wriggle free of Joram, but he couldn't tell just what was wrong with her. Fortunately, she landed a random kick squarely to his groin, causing Joram to drop her and fall to his knees. Sheppard winced as Logan landed hard on the ground and lay there, motionless.

He and McKay took cover behind some boulders. "Joram! It's me... Sheppard!" he called.

"I _know_!" snapped Joram.

"Then what the hell are you doing?!" Sheppard squawked indignantly.

"Avenging my brother!"

Sheppard looked at McKay in confusion, who merely shrugged. "By taking Logan?"

"By making you suffer before I kill you!" Joram wailed angrily.

"I didn't kill your brother, Joram, and Logan has nothing to do with this, so let her go!"

Joram looked down at Logan longingly. "It wasn't supposed to be like this..." he murmured to her before returning his attention to Sheppard. "You can't have her back, Sheppard. She belongs to _me_ now..." his eyes took on a fanatical gleam.

"He's in love with her," observed McKay.

"Ya think?" he rolled his eyes at McKay. "Joram, you need to listen to me. We can settle this between us, just leave her out of it."

"NO! I will spare your life, but only if you leave now!"

Sheppard shook his head. "That's not gonna happen, Joram."

"She belongs to _me_!" he was becoming increasingly agitated.

"She'll be the first one to tell you that she doesn't BELONG to _anyone_. And she won't appreciate you treating her like a possession, Joram. She's got a nasty temper when she's provoked..." he trailed off as he saw Joram rise up and point his weapon at Sheppard.

A single shot rang out and everybody froze. McKay and Sheppard stared in stunned silence as Joram crumbled to the ground in a heap, blood gushing from a gunshot wound to his head.

"Wasn't me," McKay held up his hands.

The two men began scanning the area to try and find the source of the shot. All he could see was Logan struggling to sit up and grab the rifle from Joram's hand. He stood up and began moving towards her.

"Logan?"

He stopped as she took aim and fired three rounds, seemingly right at him. He winced as he felt the rounds whiz past his right shoulder. He heard the impact and a voice cry out somewhere behind him. Over his shoulder, he could see the man he and McKay saw lying on the ground a few minutes earlier, grab at his chest and then slump lifelessly to the ground.

A heartbeat later, Caldwell and the others appeared over the rise and began running toward him. He looked back at Logan, who was weaving unsteadily as she lowered the weapon and fell back.

"Logan!" Sheppard called out and raced to her side.

When he reached her, he scooped her up in his arms and cradled her close to his chest. "Logan, what the hell...?" he murmured.

"Hi flyboy..." she turned and buried her face in his chest just as the others caught up to them.


	9. Chapter 9

"So all this was just to get back at _me_?!" Sheppard could barely contain his anger as he looked up into the equally angry eyes of his commanding officer.

"I don't know where the Athosian figures into things, but yeah, Kolya planned all this out just for you," Caldwell nodded.

"The Athosian blamed me for the death of his brother at the hands of the Wraith. Not that he ever let on before this," Sheppard mumbled.

Logan stirred, then looked up at Caldwell. "He was feeding Kolya information for... I don't know how long, sir."

"So _that's_ how Kolya found out about those flowers?" Caldwell asked.

"What flowers? Not those horny-blossoms?!" Sheppard gasped.

Caldwell nodded and silently pointed at Logan.

"Bastard's lucky he's already dead!" Sheppard fumed.

"But why was the Athosian trying to run off with Colonel Devane?" Caldwell asked.

McKay snorted. "He fell in love with her. Whatever Kolya had planned for her, he had other ideas."

Caldwell nodded. "I see." He knelt down in front of Logan and peered into her eyes. "Who drugged you, Kolya or the Athosian?"

"Joram...the Athosian, sir. He tried to get me to go with him, but when I wouldn't, he jabbed some kind of wooden...thing...into me and next thing I knew..."

Caldwell nodded again. "Well, what do you say, Colonel? Ready to go home?" he asked.

Logan nodded meekly. "Yes I am, sir."

Caldwell looked over at Sheppard. "Take her home, Colonel. We'll stay here and finish cleaning up this mess."

"Yes, sir."

"Wait... Sir?" Logan called out to Caldwell.

"Yes?"

"Why didn't... Didn't Kolya expose you guys to that..." she trailed off uncomfortably.

"Horny-blossom?" he smirked at Sheppard's name for it. "Yes, as a matter of fact he did."

Sheppard and McKay visibly pulled back from the others.

"Relax!" ordered Caldwell. "I can't begin to tell you why, but it didn't have any effect on us."

McKay exchanged wary glances with Sheppard. "How long ago were you exposed?"

Caldwell shrugged. "Thirty, forty minutes maybe."

"That's long enough for you to start feeling the effects..." McKay mused.

"Maybe you're immune after the first dose?" offered Logan.

"Maybe," muttered Sheppard. "But just to be sure, maybe Beckett ought to check everyone out before they come back to Atlantis."

"That's fine by me, Colonel," Caldwell nodded. "In the meantime, just get her back home. She wasn't anywhere near us when Kolya opened that container. McKay, you're with me."

"What for?" he squeaked.

"The Genii have another secret underground bunker here. Thought you might want to take a look around."

McKay lit up. "Oh, yes, of course."

Sheppard stood up, easily lifting Logan's lithe frame in his arms. "We'll see you back home, sir."

THREE HOURS LATER

"I'm _fine_ , John!" she told him for the tenth time.

"Yeah, well, I'll wait for Beckett to tell me that when ALL of your tests come back. Whatever that stuff was that Joram shot you with...Well, we just need to make sure it doesn't do anything else besides knock you out."

"John..." she stopped short when he fixed her with a determined stare.

"You know this face, Sparks, so give it up!" he warned.

Logan fell back against the pillow in quiet defeat. "You know, I can be just as bull-headed as you, flyboy, I'm just too tired to argue."

Sheppard smiled victoriously. "Good!"

Logan grew very quiet and rolled onto her side, away from Sheppard. "John?"

"Yeah?" he hadn't missed the dark mood that stole over her.

Logan's lower lip began to tremble, despite her best efforts to fight it. "Could you just..."

Sheppard moved quickly and climbed into the bed behind her. He covered her with a blanket and tucked her securely in the fold of his arms and held her snugly against his body. She was trembling, trying desperately to hold off the tears.

"Let it go, Sparky. I'm here," he whispered in her ear.

With that, she let loose with a flood of tears, her body wracked with sobs that tore at his heart. The mere thought of what Kolya had planned to do to her, to get back at him, made his blood boil. Jerud Kolya was indeed lucky that he died before Sheppard could get his hands on him. And if Acastus Kolya ever tried to wreak justice for his brother's death by hurting Logan, then he, too, would be very dead.

ONE HOUR LATER

She had been asleep in his quarters for twenty minutes when Sheppard heard a soft knock at the door. He gently extricated himself and went to answer the door. He was mildly surprised to see Caldwell standing there.

"Colonel."

"How is she?" Caldwell whispered, glancing past him at Logan.

"She's sleeping."

"I can see that."

"She's alright, sir. She was a little shaken up about what that freak had planned for her, but she's strong, and they didn't hurt her...physically" Sheppard assured him.

"Only a _little_ shaken up, huh? If Kolya told her half of the things he said to me... Most women would be hiding in a closet or something!" he hissed.

Sheppard nodded, his eyes flashing angrily at the images coming unbidden into his mind. "Colonel Devane isn't most women, sir. She wouldn't give Kolya, or anyone else, the satisfaction."

"Dr. Beckett wants to see you in the infirmary," Caldwell informed him.

Sheppard glanced back at Logan. "Now?"

"Now."

"I'd rather not... I really don't want to leave her, sir..."

"I thought you said she was alright," Caldwell arched an eyebrow at him.

Sheppard shifted nervously from one foot to the other. "Yeah, she is, but..."

"I'll stay with her while you're gone."

Sheppard looked unsure. Logan wouldn't want her commanding officer to see her at anything less than her best and she certainly wouldn't want him to see her fear.

"Sheppard, you are aware that I've known Colonel Devane for quite some time, right?" Caldwell asked.

"Yes, sir..." he still looked uneasy.

"She'll be fine until you get back. Now, the sooner you leave, the sooner you can come back."

"Yes, sir." He stole one last look back at the sleeping Logan before walking out the door.

Caldwell moved a chair over next to the bed and gently took one of Logan's hands in his. He was glad she was able to sleep, although that might be a residual effect from whatever drug it was that Joram had given her. His jaw tightened and his eyes flashed angrily as he thought about what had nearly happened to her. He also felt a swell of pride that she had managed to escape from Kolya, even though the Athosian had caught up with her.

Logan began to stir slightly, but not to awaken. He kept her hand in his so that she would know, on some level, that she wasn't alone. Suddenly, she bolted upright and screamed. "NO!"

Caldwell took her in his arms, cooing and holding her tightly against him until she stopped struggling. "Shhhhh, Logan, you're safe." he cooed softly.

"Steve?" she murmured against his chest.

"Yeah, I'm here," he whispered, his tone reassuring.

She pulled back to look up at him. "Oh... I'm sorry sir..." she stammered.

Caldwell smiled and looked her right in the eye. "Don't even try it," he warned.

"What?" she blinked.

"Logan, don't you know by now that you're safe with me? That I'm not gonna think any less of you for being afraid. That I will never see you as weak for showing that you're human?" he asked her, reaching out to brush a stray strand of hair from her face. Just as with Sheppard, her lower lip began to tremble, and her eyes began to water.

"Steve, I'm...sorry..."

Caldwell pulled her back into his arms and held her tight. "You have nothing to be sorry for, Logan."

Her arms came around him and she buried her face in his chest as she let the tears come again. Despite the fact that he was her commanding officer, Steven Caldwell was the only one, aside from Sheppard, that she trusted enough to let her guard down with. She knew, without a doubt, that what happened between them, stayed between them, and wouldn't end up on an official report somewhere down the line.

THREE DAYS LATER

Kate Heightmeyer studied Logan's sullen face before trying again. "How are the nightmares?"

"Less frequent."

"This was exactly what you were afraid of happening to you again," she noted.

"This was different."

"Oh?" Heightmeyer prodded.

Logan took a deep breath. She knew there was no getting out of these sessions, but she hated it. "I wasn't held prisoner for a year this time..." she trailed off as she thought about Kolya's plans for her and for Sheppard.

"No, you weren't. It may have been only a matter of hours, but the fact remains, you WERE held hostage. You were tortured, emotionally. Kolya's threats, toward both you and Colonel Sheppard had to be the stuff of your worst nightmares," she pointed out.

"Yes."

"I'm sorry you had to go through that."

Logan shrugged. "It's not like he was able to follow through on his threats. I got away, we all got away, and Kolya never got to lay a hand on me or Colonel Sheppard."

"Still, there are nightmares."

"A few, like I said. Look, doc, I'm all right."

"I agree."

Logan perked up and sat forward. "You do?"

"Yes, I do. I'd be concerned if you DIDN'T have nightmares, but it doesn't seem to be affecting your day-to-day. You are sleeping, you're eating. I think you're handling everything very well."

Logan blinked incredulously. "Thank you. Does that mean..."

"You can go back to full duty..." she paused to raise a hand as Logan rose from her chair. "Provided..."

Logan slumped back in her chair again. "Provided what?"

"Provided you come see me if the nightmares get worse or you start to feel overwhelmed."

Logan stood up again, a brilliant smile on her face. "Deal! Thanks Doc!"

"You're welcome. I'll inform Colonel Caldwell."

Logan fairly bolted from the room and went off in search of Sheppard. It was Teyla she found instead.

"Logan."

"Teyla."

"I wonder if I might have a word with you?"

"Um, sure. What's up?"

"I wanted to apologize, again, for what Joram did to you and the others."

"Teyla, you're not responsible for what Joram did."

"I am their leader. I should have known that Joram had not gotten past what happened to his brother."

"He chose to blame Colonel Sheppard because it was easier than blaming the Wraith. He chose to align himself with the Genii rather than seeking help from his own people, or even facing Colonel Sheppard on his own. You can't take the blame for that upon yourself."

"I knew he had developed feelings for you."

Logan looked at her in surprise. "Really?"

"The last time he was in the city, I saw the way he looked at you. I thought it was... harmless."

"It wouldn't have mattered, even if you'd told me about it. It wouldn't have changed how he felt about Colonel Sheppard. Whatever his feelings for me, his hatred for John was much stronger. There is nothing you could have done to change that, so please, stop blaming yourself."

"You are very kind."

Logan laughed at that. "Hardly."

"You do not give yourself enough credit."

"And you, my friend, give me way too much credit!" She laughed and hugged Teyla.

"Now, tell me, have you heard from Teal'c?"

Teyla actually blushed. "Indeed, I have."

Logan smiled. "How is he?"

"He is well. He is trying to arrange for time away so that he may visit Atlantis again."

"I hope he does. I'm sure you miss him every bit as much as I do." she teased.

"I...I... Teal'c is an interesting man..."

Logan laughed again. "He is, isn't he? And, if I may be so bold, he is rather a perfect match for you."

"Logan!" Teyla swatted playfully at her arm.

"Come on Teyla, it's just us girls here. Teal'c is one of the best people I have ever known, just like you. As much as it comforts me to know that he is still back home, looking after Earth's safety, I miss him, and I wish he were here. He would be a valuable asset in our fight against the Wraith, not to mention, the perfect man for you."

"You are impossible!" Teyla laughed, still blushing furiously.

"I've been called worse!"

THREE DAYS LATER

"Colonel Devane?"

"Yes sir?" She stepped cautiously into the newly discovered wing off the lab they'd found the day before.

"There's a lot of water damage in here." Caldwell informed her.

It was unusual for Caldwell to accompany them on these types of recon. She guessed it was mere boredom on his part.

"Sgt. Bates? We'll take this room, you and the others split up among the remaining rooms."

"Yes ma'am." he took the others and fanned out down the hall.

"Any idea what this was?" he asked as they made their way through the halls and into a larger room.

"If I had to guess, sir, I'd say these were living and recreation quarters for the scientists who worked that lab."

"Looks like it..." He was cut off by the sudden shifting of the floor beneath them and a deafening roar and looked up in time to see a portion of the roof collapse. He dove into Logan, knocking her out of the way of the cave in.

Alarms were blaring all over the city when Logan shook her head and looked around at the devastation. Caldwell was lying on the floor, half on top of her and half next to her, but his left arm was pinned under several feet of debris.

"Sir!" she coughed.

"I'm alright," he coughed in response.

Logan scrambled out from underneath him and began clearing away the debris.

"Hang on, Steve." she moved frantically to free him as she keyed her mike and tried calling for help. "Devane to Bates."

No response.

"Devane to control room." Nothing again.

"Radio's dead, Steve."

He nodded, indicating that he hadn't even heard her on his earpiece.

When she'd managed to lift the last piece of debris off his arm, she gingerly helped him roll onto his back and began to check his arm. It was bleeding profusely, even through his jacket. She helped him remove the jacket, then tore his sleeve off to get a look at the wound. She could see right away that his arm was broken, but there was also a nasty gash above his bicep. Using his sleeve, she managed to tie off the bleeder long enough to find her backpack and pull out the medical supplies she always carried with her.

He had to be in incredible pain, but he never cried out. Instead he quietly kept his eyes on her as she worked.

"Your arm is broken, Steve, and I'm going to have to stitch up that gash."

"Okay," he winced.

"You're not nervous about my meager medical skills?" she teased.

"There is nothing meager about any of your skills, Logan." he smiled.

"You say that now..." she trailed off as she noticed his eyes fixed on something behind her.

She turned to see what he was looking at and was astounded to see the entrance they'd come through now buried in twisted metal and debris.

"Looks like it's just you and me," she coughed.

"Could be worse."

"How's that?"

"I could be trapped in here with McKay."

She laughed in spite of the situation.

"You always were a real glass-is-half-full kind of guy," she laughed.

His eyes widened, ever so slightly, as she pulled out her suture kit and began sterilizing his arm.

"Don't suppose you have any whiskey in that bag, do you?"

"No," she shook her head, wishing she had some for herself as well.

"Tequila?"

"Sorry. I do have some anesthetic, though." She held up a small bottle and shook it in front of him.

"Not quite the effect I was hoping for," he chuckled.

"Me either. But it'll help," she murmured, filling the syringe. It wasn't nearly strong enough to handle the kind of pain he was in - and would be in as she worked on him.

He didn't flinch as she injected the anesthetic around the gash. He was easily the most stoic patient she'd ever treated, next to Teal'c. After a few moments, to give the anesthetic a chance to work, she began carefully stitching up his wound. Not that Steve Caldwell was very vain, but she was when it came to this type of work. She didn't want to leave a big, ugly scar, so she concentrated on making her stitches as perfectly symmetrical as she could. Caldwell never took his eyes off her as she worked. She was a mess from the the cave in. Dirt smudged her face and her hair hung in loose tendrils around her face but she was still a vision of beauty. So intense was her concentration, that she never noticed how intently he studied her face. When she finished stitching his wound, she gingerly assessed the damage to the broken bone in his arm. She could easily feel where the break occurred.

"I can set it, but it's gonna hurt like hell." she warned.

Caldwell shrugged. "It'll hurt more later."

"Yes it will," she looked at him with concern etched on her face.

He nodded without hesitation. "Do it."

She positioned herself over him, gently maneuvering his arm into position. Then she looked into his eyes for confirmation and saw the absolute trust he placed in her. Without a word, and without a thought as to how badly she was flouting regs, she leaned down and plastered a searing kiss on his mouth. He stiffened for only a moment, then allowed himself to be lost in the moment. When she pulled back, a slow smile formed on her lips as she winked at him saucily. "Anesthesia," she explained simply, then shrugged and wrenched his arm hard. He gasped once with the pain, but still didn't cry out. Sweat poured down his face and he didn't speak as she began wrapping his arm tightly, in place of a cast.

"You're one of the bravest men I've ever known, Steven Caldwell," she cooed as she gently bathed the dirt and sweat from his face.

He reached up and took her hand in his. "Thank you, Logan," he whispered.

"You're welcome," she murmured and impulsively bent down to brush a soft kiss on his forehead.

Their eyes met and locked as she began to pull back, freezing her in place. For a long moment, they stared into one another's eyes, until Caldwell reached up and pulled her face down to his. Her heart began to pound and her lips parted to meet his in a searing kiss. All pretense at professionalism evaporated with that kiss as her body seemed to melt against his. His free hand tangled in her hair and held her fast against him as his mouth explored hers. Her hands moved up to caress his face before slipping down to his chest. She wasn't sure whose heart was beating faster, his or hers. For a few brief moments, they forgot all about protocol, regulations, or rank and simply lost themselves in the passion of that kiss.


	10. Chapter 10

Sheppard, Bates and thirty others struggled through the remainder of the previous day and all through the night to remove the debris surrounding the entrance to the wing where Caldwell and Logan were trapped. They'd been unable to reach them on the radio and, with the exception of Sheppard, they were beginning to fear the worst.

Weir kept trying to get an exhausted Sheppard to go back to his quarters and rest, but he refused to leave. His frustration was mounting with the seemingly impossible task of getting through the debris to reach their trapped colleagues. The engineers couldn't seem to find a way to clear a path without bringing the rest of that section of the building down on top of them, as well as Caldwell and Logan, assuming they weren't already buried under the existing debris. It was an agonizingly slow and painful process. Sheppard seemed to be the only one who was absolutely sure that Logan, at least, was still alive.

"How can you be so completely sure?" Weir asked.

"I would KNOW!" he insisted vehemently.

"John, please forgive me for being so blunt, but how? HOW would you know?" she asked.

"You mean like when I didn't know she was still alive and being held in Afghanistan?" he winced.

"Yes," she eyed him apologetically.

"I was an idiot. I didn't trust my gut back then. I listened to the witnesses and the doctors who told me that the body parts they found were hers, all confirmed by blood tests. I let them convince me that I couldn't accept her death because I didn't WANT to...Not this time! Logan's alive in there, and there's a damn good chance Caldwell is, too. If he is hurt, then Logan will be taking care of him."

Weir nodded. "And if SHE is the one that's hurt?"

"Caldwell knows enough about emergency first aid to take care of her."

"I hope you're right, John, I do. I just want you to be prepared, should the worst come to pass. We don't know how long it's going to take to dig them out. They have no food, and probably very little water."

Sheppard continued to shake his head. "They have rations...Power bars, and their canteens. We don't know what's in that wing, they may even have access to fresh water. You don't know Logan the way I do. There's no way she's not fighting with everything she has in order to survive."

Weir nodded again. "You won't be any good to her if you collapse, John. She'd want you to rest."

"Not gonna happen," he said resolutely.

He knew she was alive. He could feel it. He also knew Caldwell was alive and likely injured. It would explain the turmoil he could feel surrounding her. No, he didn't know _how_ he could know any of that, but he did. He always knew when she needed him, or when she was in trouble or worried about something. It had always been that way. Even as very young children, they shared a connection that was almost psychic. And yes, he should have known she was still alive - even after all the doctors and superiors assured him she couldn't be. He still kicked himself over that failure. His failure. He'd been her sworn protector from the cradle and he had let her down when it counted the most. He'd never be able to make that up to her, even though she insisted again and again that what had happened to her in Afghanistan was not his fault, and he was to blame for none of it. She'd even gone so far as to suggest that it was likely her own fault. That she'd shut down - emotionally - so she could deal with Abdul Ramiin on her own terms, with a clear head; without showing any sign of weakness. While that had a ring of truth or plausibility to it, he still couldn't help but blame himself. He probably always would. Well, he wouldn't let her down this time.

MINUTES LATER / INSIDE THE COLLAPSED WING:

Caldwell awoke to see Logan standing by a window on the opposite side of the room, staring out to sea.

"Logan," he croaked.

She turned, flashing him a warm smile and hurried over to him. "Sleep well?" she asked.

"Well enough," he croaked again.

Something about the way his eyes looked instantly gave her cause for concern. She reached down and felt his face.

"My God, Steve, you're burning up!" She reached into her bag for her ear-thermometer and quickly checked his temperature. "103..." she began rummaging in her bag again. "Looks like you have an infection...I guess those pills I gave you weren't strong enough."

She pulled the vial of penicillan out and began the work of grinding the pills into a powder and pouring that into a small cup she carried in her medical bag. She added a small amount of water to dissolve the powder and held the cup up to his lips.

"Drink." she ordered.

Caldwell swallowed the bitter mix without complaint, then layed back again. He smiled weakly up at her as she stroked his face, from jawline to forehead.

"I'm sorry Steve, I should have given you more right from the start." she murmured softly.

His free hand came up and he placed a silencing finger on her lips. "We had no way of knowing for sure that it'd get infected. You've taken great care of me, Logan." he whispered.

She smiled down at him, and took his hand in hers, kissing the back of it softly. "You've been a surprisingly model patient, sir." she breathed.

"Yeah, well, you've got a great bedside manner, why wouldn't I be?" he teased.

She kissed him again, on the forehead this time, and turned to look out the window. "It's morning. What do you think is taking them so long?"

Caldwell followed her gaze out the window. For some reason it felt, to him, like he hadn't been alone with her for long enough. The inner-struggle he'd been fighting for so long kicked up again. Everything he was feeling, everything he'd done last night was so far out of character for him. Now he'd placed her in a ridiculously awkward situation, one he'd promised himself he would never allow.

"We've really mucked things up now, haven't we, Steve?" she said before turning back to face him.

He gave her hand a squeeze and shrugged. "I never meant to put you in this position, Logan. I swore to myself that I wouldn't."

"Hey, you're not alone in this, you know? I told you, I've been feeling the same...pull...for a while now."

"After what happened before...when I was under the influence of that damned flower..."

"You mean the horny-blossom?" she tried not to giggle.

"Yeah, well... I didn't want you to ever feel..." he trailed off uncertainly.

"Steve, it was because of that damned horny-blossom that I learned how... uh... what a great kisser you are. No, the circumstances weren't pleasant, but I did feel...something...when you kissed me," she told him.

"Besides revulsion?" he quipped.

"I wasn't revolted!" she countered. "I was...curious... Steve, I WANTED you to kiss me again. You. Without the compulsion of some horny-blossom, or booze or anything else... I knew it was wrong, but..."

He reached up and cupped her face in one large hand. "I knew it was wrong, too. And I'll be damned if I didn't do it anyway."

"Likewise," she smiled.

"That is _so_ unlike us," he grimaced.

"Yeah."

Sheppard was gonna plotz. And with good reason. Steven Caldwell was their superior officer, for crying out loud. Their C.O. Ranking military Officer in Atlantis. Even tossing aside professional ethics, any kind of romantic entanglement between them was just... not a good idea. She'd had this argument with herself periodically over the years of working with Caldwell at the SGC. Before Daniel. After Daniel. Even before his wife died, she'd felt a deep connection with him. And, if she were being completely honest? More than a little attraction. Now she'd gone and done what she'd sworn to herself she would never do.

SEEMINGLY HOURS LATER

Logan paced back and forth down the hall while Caldwell slept. The limited amount of medical supplies she carried with her were dwindling rapidly. Her watch had broken during the cave-in, so she had no idea how long they'd been trapped in here, but it seemed like days. She wondered just how much debris the others had to dig through to get to them. Every time she tried to move the wreckage on this side of the cave-in, the whole thing threatened to come down on top of them. She had to assume that they were having the same problem.

"John must be going out of his mind," she sighed to herself.

In fact, she knew he was. She could feel it. She knew he wouldn't sleep until _he_ knew she was safe. Logan shook her head and chuckled wryly to herself. Seems she'd done nothing but worry him sick since her arrival here. And even before that. Punchy, from lack of sleep, she walked back to the room where Caldwell slept. His fever was still high, and she could tell from the beads of sweat on his brow that he was in a great deal of pain. She rechecked her supplies and fished out a few more penicillin tablets, crushed them, and poured water into the cup. She ripped off her sleeve and soaked it in a basin she'd found earlier. Gingerly, she began bathing his face and neck, in an effort to cool him down. She tried to keep her attention focused on the task at hand, rather than the bare skin beneath her fingertips. Steve Caldwell was a beautiful man. His body was strong and taut, well muscled but not overly so. His chest was liberally sprinkled with coarse hair that did nothing to hide the well defined pectorals and six-pack abs beneath it. She took in the broad shoulders, powerful biceps and trim waist. His hands were large and soft, but for the callouses of a fighting soldier. She blushed ferociously, suddenly sensing he was awake and watching her. She smiled down at him, then reached for the cup she'd prepared for him.

"Drink."

He complied again, without argument, then smiled back at her. "Worth it," he murmured hoarsely.

At that moment, on the other side of the cave-in, Lorne came racing down the hall calling for Sheppard. "Sir!"

Sheppard, breathing heavily and covered in dirt and sweat, turned wearily as Lorne came to a halt beside him.

"I can't believe we didn't consider this before..."

"What is it Lorne?" Sheppard asked impatiently.

"The jumper, sir." Lorne looked at him.

"The jumper?" Sheppard eyed him blankly. He was so tired. And scared.

"Yeah. Why can't we use the jumper to get them out?" Lorne asked.

Sheppard and McKay both stared at him uncomprehendingly. It had been a long, long day and a half since the cave in and they were all so bleary minded.

"Major...Maybe it's just fatigue, but I don't understand what you're getting..." McKay trailed off as a loud half/groan - half/yell from Sheppard cut him off.

"Of course!" Sheppard grabbed his head and yelled again. He should have thought of that right away.

"What?!"

"Bates?!" he barked.

"Yes sir?"

"There are windows on that side of the building, right?" Sheppard asked.

Bates paused to think for a moment. "Yes...Several...And one room had windows from ceiling to floor!"

McKay turned and started banging his head against the wall closest to him.

"What's going on?" Weir's attention had been attracted by the sudden commotion.

"We fly the jumper over to the window, break in and get them out that way!" Sheppard was already running down the hall with Bates, McKay and Lorne in close pursuit.

Logan couldn't believe her eyes when she caught sight of the jumper outside the window. She could see Sheppard waving to her from the pilot seat, motioning her away in the direction of the large conference-like room down the hall. She knew instinctively what he meant to do. Giving Caldwell a gentle nudge, she raced down the hall and into the room. She grabbed a chair and hurled it at the glass. It took several tries, but she eventually managed to shatter it completely.

Logan watched as Sheppard expertly maneuvered the jumper as closely as he could get it to the building before lowering the rear hatch. Bates and Lorne swung out of the jumper, suspended by harness and ropes. She couldn't suppress the urge to hug Bates when he landed inside the room, closely followed by Lorne.

"Where's Colonel Caldwell?" Lorne asked.

"Down the hall. He was injured during the cave-in and he's developed an infection," she informed them as she led them down the hall to where Caldwell lay.

Sheppard had been watching Logan wander aimlessly through the halls of Atlantis for three days now. She didn't appear to be any worse for wear since they'd pulled her and Caldwell from the damaged wing on the other side of the city, but something wasn't right. Understandably, her favorite hangout was any quiet, open-air space, particularly the balcony off of her quarters. There was a sadness about her these days, a restlessness. She was also getting to be jumpy as a cat, something very unlike her. She didn't hear him enter her quarters, so focused was she on the water surrounding the city..

"Logan?"

Spooked, she jumped about a foot in the air before turning to face him. "Please don't do that!" she snipped.

"Sorry," he murmured. "Can we talk?" he asked.

"Sure," she said brightly. A little too brightly. "What's on your mind?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing," he stared at her pointedly. It wasn't like her to shut him out so completely.

"John..."

He held up a hand to cut her off. "Please, Logan. We know each other too well to try and bullshit one another. Something's been eating away at you for a while now... Why can't you talk to me about it?"

She could see the hurt in his eyes at the notion that there was anything she couldn't trust him with.

"I... don't... know." she shook her head. "You're the one person I can talk to about anything, but..." A single tear slid down her face, spurring Sheppard forward to take her in his arms. He held her for a while, whispering words of encouragement that, for some reason, only managed to agitate her even more.

"Okay," he nodded. "You're feeling guilty about something. Why?"

She turned away, unable to face him. Of course he'd be able to sense that. He knew her better than anyone, even better than she did herself, sometimes.

"Logan. You know no matter what you say or do, it isn't gonna change the way I think of you. Nothing can," he assured her.

She chuckled dryly at that. "I wouldn't be so sure about that, if I were you."

"I _am_ sure. And so should you be. Now what's gotten you all tied up in knots?" he turned her around and held her by her shoulders, gently but firmly.

When she still couldn't meet his eyes, he decided to question her about everything that had happened recently that might have set her off.

"Is it what happened with Kolya?"

She shook her head vehemently. "No! Why should I feel bad about killing _him_?"

"You shouldn't," he agreed. "You homesick?"

"No, oddly enough."

He paused, looking deep into her eyes. She'd been acting squirrely even before this but he hazarded a guess anyway: "Does this have anything to do with...Do you feel bad about Caldwell getting hurt in that cave-in?"

Bingo! There it was: that telltale flash in her eyes. Not to mention the sudden churning in the air surrounding them. Emotional turbulence, her mother had called it.

"Why? It's not like YOU were the one who brought the roof down on top of you two."

"He pushed me out of the way, when the roof collapsed. He got hurt because he was trying to save me," she reminded him.

"And for that, I'm eternally grateful. If he hadn't pushed you out of the way, you'd have been crushed under all that debris. He came out of that with a broken arm..."

"And a nasty infection!" she added.

"Nevertheless, I haven't heard him complaining. He did what you or I would have done."

"I know." She tried to look away again, but he wouldn't let her.

"Then _what's_ the problem? He...He wasn't giving you a hard time while you guys were trapped in there?" his face took on a horrified expression.

She worked hard to stifle her natural inclination toward nervous giggling at the unintended pun. "No...Of course not."

"So...He wasn't giving you any grief, but you still feel guilty about something... What the hell did he do to you?" he let her go and began pacing thoughtfully around the balcony.

"Colonel Caldwell is a good man, John. You know that!" she said.

Sheppard stopped pacing, his eyes widening as realization dawned on him. "No!" he shook his head.

"What?"

"Tell me you're not..." he gaped at her incredulously.

"What?"

He came up and stood toe to toe with her. "You haven't developed a...THING...for him, have you?"

"A thing?" She was doing her level best not to look away.

"Oh, my God. How could I not see it?" he moved away and resumed his pacing.

"Crap," she thought to herself. She never could hide anything from him.

"What the hell... Logan...?" he shook his head, all the pieces falling into place.

"John..."

Now he was shaking his head _and_ gesturing wildly as he mumbled to himself. "You can't be...You KNOW better...How could you possibly...?"

"How could I possibly be WHAT, John? Human?" she replied defensively.

"What? No! What are you saying?" he asked, thoroughly floored.

"I'm human...Flawed..." she choked back tears and turned away from him. "And I'm..."

"You're _what_ , Sparky?"

"Lonely..." she admittedly softly.

"What? You're not alone here, you're surrounded by friends..."

"Friends, yes..."

He knew what she meant, but that was not somewhere he wanted to go. He hated thinking about her those terms.

"Is this about you missing Daniel?" he asked.

"No! Maybe. Something like that. Look, you haven't exactly been a choirboy, yourself, you know? I was locked away for a year before coming here and I haven't so much as..." she trailed off, knowing that was a place neither one of them was comfortable with.

"So, you're not in love with him, you're just..." he trailed off, not wanting to vocalize that particular thought.

She glared up at him in response.

"You aren't, are you? In love with him?" the very thought gave him the wiggins.

"It hasn't gone that far," she admitted.

"You didn't _tell_ him how you feel, did you?" he winced.

"We had a lot of time to kill down there, John."

"Are you _crazy_?" he barked. "Suppose he transfers you out of here?"

"He wouldn't do that," she snapped irritably.

"He's your _C.O._ Logan! Of course he would..." Another thought stopped him dead in his tracks. "He _did_ try something when we were under the influence of those damned horny-blossoms, didn't he?"

"No more than you did," she reminded him.

"What about after?" he prodded, not entirely sure he really wanted to know.

"After?"

"After everyone was *cured*?"

"John..."

"Did he make a move on you when you guys were trapped?" another thought hit him almost immediately. "Or when I left him with you after Kolya's little surprise?"

Her silence was all the answer he needed.

"That sonofabitch..."

"I wanted him to!" she cried.

"You wanted...I don't _care_! He's your damned C.O. and even if _you_ didn't know better, which by the way, you DO; _he_ sure as hell knew better than to put you in that position!" his eyes were flashing angrily.

"He wasn't exactly in full control, you know. I could have stopped it before..."

"Please tell me you didn't sleep with him?!" he asked, horrified at the thought.

"NO!" she snapped.

Sheppard blinked uncomprehendingly. "No, you're not gonna tell me or no, you didn't sleep with him?"

"I didn't sleep with him, John...But I wanted to," she admitted grudgingly.

"Good God, Logan..." he trailed off in exasperation.

"Guess there IS something I could tell you that WOULD change your opinion of me."

"No! Don't be ridiculous. I'm angry with you because I love you, and I don't want to see you make a mistake that could not only cause you a great deal of personal pain, but ruin your career."

"I can't help the way I feel, John. I've tried to fight it, but..." she shrugged helplessly.

"You _have to_ fight it, Sparks. You _have_ to. And so does he!" he snapped angrily.

"You want to put all the blame for this on him, but that's not fair. It's not all one-sided, you know."

"I do blame him...mostly. He had to see that you were vulnerable, he never should have..." he trailed off.

"You apparently don't think much of my ability to entice a man on my own merits..." she chuckled nervously.

"Are you _kidding_? All our lives I've seen the way guys look at you, I've heard the things they said about you, and what they wanted to do with you..." he looked away, clearly uncomfortable.

"Hence all the fights you were getting into at school?"

"Duh!" he threw his hands up in the air. "You're an amazing woman, Sparks. Of course men are gonna be falling at your feet. Even that idiot, Joram, couldn't help but fall for you, but Caldwell is military. Your _C.O._ He doesn't have the luxury of indulging in any fantasy with a subordinate under his command!"

"You think he doesn't know that?" she squawked.

"Does he? Maybe he needs to be reminded before he encourages you to indulge in any fantasies of your own!" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Don't you dare!" she warned.

"Why shouldn't I?"

"He's YOUR C.O., too. And whatever he does or doesn't do with another of his subordinates is really none of your business, and you'd be way out of line to even talk to him about it!"

"And HE'S not out of line for seducing you?" Sheppard was almost spitting nails, he was so angry.

"I never said _he_ seduced _me_. Maybe I'm the one who seduced him, did you ever think about that?"

"I try not to!" he snapped.

"Then why don't you try forgetting that we ever had this conversation?" she snarled.

"As if I _could_!"

"You just couldn't leave it alone, could you?!" she cried. "You had to hound me until I told you what I KNEW you didn't want to hear. Now you can't DEAL?"

"I can deal. Can you?" he countered.

"What?"

"With the consequences. Can you deal with the consequences if this thing between you is allowed to go on?" he asked.

"ALLOWED to go on? You mean, like... with your PERMISSION?!" her voice took on a dangerously icy tone.

He recognized the infuriated gleam in her eyes, but he was just as angry as she was and couldn't stop himself.

"Answer the question, Sparky!"

"I'm a big girl, John. I can deal just FINE!" She turned on her heel and then did something she'd never done in her life: She walked out on him.

Sheppard stood there, quietly fuming, yet stunned that she'd actually walked out on him.


	11. Chapter 11

Logan made a point of avoiding Sheppard for the rest of the day. It wasn't easy, but she managed. By the time evening rolled around, she found herself inextricably drawn to Caldwell's quarters. Promising herself she was just going to check on him and that was ALL, she knocked on the door before she could talk herself out of it.

A rush of heat shot through her when Caldwell opened the door and stood in the entry way. She could feel her cheeks color, but managed to look him in the eye. "Hi," she stammered.

"Logan..."

"Just came to check up on my favorite patient." she managed to say the words without stuttering.

He flashed her a grin that sent another searing burst of heat right through her. "Come on in. I was actually going to come and find you in a little while."

"Oh," was all she could manage.

On the bed was his half-packed duffle bag.

"Steve...What...?"

"I'm being ordered back to Earth."

Panic gripped her. Surely John hadn't said anything. "Why?"

Caldwell shrugged and continued his one-handed packing. "For starters, they know I was injured and that I'll be out of commission for a little while. They think I can heal just as well back home as I can here. There's also an excellent possibility that I might be reassigned to the Prometheus."

His tone was matter of fact, but she could see that the prospect pained him.

"But we need _you_ here. Not some stuffed shrub who has no concept of what we're doing or how important it is, or..."

He reached out and placed a hand over her lips. "This has nothing to do with you and I, Logan."

"Are you sure?" she blinked up at him.

He nodded and forced himself to resist the urge to stroke her silken hair.

"You don't want to go, though...Do you?" her eyes were round and sad.

"No, not really."

"If they do reassign you..."

"I wouldn't be your commanding officer any more," he cut her off. "And you won't have to walk that thin line between duty and other things. All things being equal though, if they're going to give me command of a ship, I'd rather have the Daedalus back..."

She looked up into his eyes. "I'd still want you to stay, personal feelings aside. Everybody here trusts you and looks up to you."

"Would they still, if they knew how close you and I have come to..." he left that thought unspoken and returned to his packing.

"Do you think they're really going to do it? Reassign you, I mean?" she asked.

"I'd say it's almost definite," he blew out a heavy sigh.

"When are you leaving?"

"0800 tomorrow morning," he replied.

Before either of them could say or do anything more, they were interrupted by a radio call, beckoning Caldwell to the infirmary. He flashed her a mournful glance, shrugged and let out a deep sigh. "Probably best to say our goodbyes now, Logan."

"Please don't say goodbye," she pleaded. "Not goodbye. Not ever."

He leaned in, cupping her face in one hand and kissed her tenderly, fighting against the urge to deepen the kiss, or take things where they definitely ought not to go. "Until we meet again, then," he whispered, then turned and walked out without looking back.

When the door closed behind him, Logan summoned all her strength and tried to clamp down on her churning emotions. From a purely professional standpoint, she knew that separating herself from him, or rather vice-versa, was the right thing to do. Professional ethics notwithstanding, she'd been here before - with Daniel. At some point, Caldwell would begin to freak out about all the danger she'd be facing *out there* and it would begin to erode the relationship. Yes, she and Daniel had managed to build a new relationship. One of mutual respect, friendship, and genuine affection. Who knew if she and Caldwell could manage the same feat, should they become romantically entangled?

After leaving Caldwell's quarters, she wandered aimlessly through the unused halls and corridors of Atlantis. She wasn't ready to go back to her own quarters. More like she wasn't ready to face Sheppard. It didn't matter that he'd been right - essentially - about how dangerous it would be for her to even consider trying to have a relationship with Caldwell. He WAS her superior officer, after all. Friendship aside, she respected the man immensely and didn't want to place him in any position where his career might suffer. Sexy as he was, she had no right to risk his career.

Not that she was ready to admit any of that to Sheppard. Cheese and crackers, the man could be so infuriating. Especially when he started acting like her father! She hadn't forgotten the conversation she'd overheard between them back when they'd been in the ninth grade. Sheppard had come home with a split lip that day. No more than a mere scratch compared to what he'd done to the other guy. Over what? The stupid boy had been mouthing off about what he'd done to and with Logan the night before, and how he looked forward to more of the same on their next date.

That alone would have been bad enough, but it was all a lie. All of it. Logan had never gone out with that creep, nor had any desire to. She'd never so much as been alone with him, even at school. He'd been trying to bolster his rep as a ladies man and, since Logan had really begun to come into her own, she'd been an object of competition among some of the boys in their grade. They saw her as nothing more than a piece of tail - a trophy. But he'd bragged in front of the wrong person that day. Sheppard had heard everything, and he'd called him on it - in front of all the other boys. Even if he didn't know Logan as well as he did, he knew the boy was lying through his teeth. That he couldn't have been with Logan the night before, or any night for at least the previous two weeks. Why? Because she had been with Sheppard and his parents for the past two weeks, because her own parents were out of town at a conference and had only just returned the night before!

Sheppard had demanded that he tell the truth and then stay far away from Logan, but the boy, intent on salvaging his supposed manhood, had only dug in his heels deeper, spouted more lies and then took a swing at Sheppard for trying to impugn his rep. He got one shot, and then it was all Sheppard. He'd thrashed him soundly, but hadn't done any permanent damage. Both boys received a one-week suspension from school and, since his own parents weren't home yet, Logan's father had been the one to retrieve him from the Principal's office.

While he'd done his duty, and sternly reminded him that fighting had no place in school, or in polite society, he also expressed to the boy that he'd been extremely proud. Proud and grateful to have him looking out for his daughter. He was not blind to the beauty his daughter was becoming with each passing day. And, having been a teenage boy once himself, he knew the effect she would have on them - as well as other girls who would envy her looks and the attention it would garner. Young Sheppard had been her protector virtually from the cradle, and he was grateful for that. He did not have a son of his own, but if he had, he would wish for a boy just like Johnny Sheppard.

She'd fallen asleep at some point, late into the night, and it wasn't until a ray of sunlight streaming through the rafters finally jolted her awake. She checked her watch and was relieved to find that it was only 0750. She had time to make it to the control room to see Caldwell off. If only from the sidelines. She bolted up and shaking off the weariness and stiffness of sleeping in an awkward place and position, she hurried off down the ramp and to the hallway where the nearest transporter was located. When she arrived, she could see that everyone else was already there. She heard all the well-wishes and promises to stay in touch, as well as Caldwell's admonition for all of them to look after each other.

He left final instructions and made it clear that Sheppard was, once again, the ranking military officer in Atlantis and Devane was second in command. She could feel Sheppard's eyes boring into her, but she would not look at him. She held her breath as McKay dialed the gate and trembled only slightly. Caldwell dared to hazard one last look at her before stepping through the event horizon. Logan bit back the tears that threatened to come and chatted briefly with Teyla while everyone split up and went back to their duties, then excused herself when she caught a glimpse of Sheppard heading her way. She wasn't ready to talk to him, so she found herself heading off to anywhere she thought she normally wouldn't be found by him. Again.

But find her he did. An hour later, he found her sitting in the rafter space above the gym, which was where she'd spent the previous night. She was rocking back and forth, tears streaming down her face. All the anger that had been building up over the past two days instantly evaporated at the sight of her. He bent down, scooped her up and cradled her in his arms, taking up a gentle rocking motion of his own. Her quiet sobs tore at his heart, but he said nothing, knowing that she didn't need words, she just needed HIM.

He knew that Caldwell's sudden departure would have affected her anyway, even if she hadn't developed *feelings* for the man. Given her recent revelation, however, he was sure that his leaving had hit her doubly hard. He mentally kicked himself for the way he'd spoken to her, knowing that much of what he had to say had been motivated by his own tendency to overprotect her. Not that everything he'd said was wrong. Getting involved with Caldwell would have been a recipe for disaster, not to mention career suicide.

He could feel her sobs finally begin to subside, but still he said nothing until she spoke.

"I'm sorry, John," she croaked.

"I'm sorry, too, Sparky." he murmured, resting his chin on the top of her head.

"I shouldn't have walked out on you like that... Or tried to hide from you afterwards."

"No, you shouldn't," he agreed. "But I shouldn't have driven you to that point either. Oh, and... don't you already KNOW that there is no place, in any universe, where you can hide from me?"

Logan managed a weak grin and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'm a real mess, aren't I?"

"A bit," he agreed. "But not so bad that we can't fix it."

"I suppose you're relieved that he's gone." It was more statement than question.

"In a sense, yes, I am. But not just for the reason you think. I liked the guy, I respected him..." he trailed off thoughtfully.

"He's not dead, John!" she cut him off.

"I know, I know. Aside from the fact that any feelings he may have for you could only complicate your life, I liked having him here. He was fair, he..."

"Usually saw things the same way you do, and pretty much let you do things the way you wanted to and was there to take the heat if something went wrong?" she finished for him.

"Exactly!" he grinned. "Seriously, Sparks... I hate that you're hurting over this. It's just one of the reasons I didn't think you should get involved with him in the first place. I suppose it's all moot now, though."

She nodded. "Pretty much."

"You do know I had nothing to do with his getting reassigned, don't you?"

She pulled back to look him in the eye. "Yes, of course. I know you'd never do anything like that, even as mad as you were..."

"I was more worried than angry."

"I know."

"Can we not do this anymore?" he asked.

"What? Fight?"

"Fight like _that_. We've done our fair share of disagreeing over the years, but nothing like _that_..." he shuddered.

"It was pretty scary," she nodded.

"So let's not do it again, okay? No matter how angry we get, nobody walks out," he said.

"Agreed. Nobody walks out." She wrapped her arms around his neck again and held on for dear life.

"I love you, Johnny. I'm so sorry I put you through that."

"I love you, too, Logan. And I'll try not to act so much like your father in the future," he promised. "In the distant future, probably... when you're old and gray and men aren't chasing you around the city, trying to..."

"John Sheppard!" she squawked indignantly, before bursting out with laughter. "You should talk, Captain Kirk!"

Four weeks passed and still there had been no word from Earth about any possible replacement for Caldwell. Sheppard wasn't sure if he was relieved or disappointed. If they decided to send another person, like Colonel Everett, he KNEW he wouldn't be a happy camper. For that matter, neither would anyone else. At least Caldwell "got" it. They might not be that lucky again. If they chose not to send a replacement, that meant Sheppard would remain the ranking military officer. There were pros and cons to that, too.

Probably the only good thing about Caldwell being gone was that Logan seemed to be okay again. The conflict that had been tearing her apart was gone. She, like Sheppard, missed Caldwell's presence as a leader, though he knew it went a little deeper than that. She'd admitted, that evening up in the rafters that she didn't think she was in love with him, but she did feel *something.* He found himself cringing at the thought, but maybe she just needed to get laid. Logan was not the type who indulged in casual sex, just for the sake of having sex, so she would have chosen someone she trusted enough to open herself up with. Caldwell did fit that bill. Their friendship went back to her first day at the SGC.

Sheppard envied Caldwell's close association with her during that time. He'd been able to share her experiences of off-world missions, whereas she'd been forbidden to share it with him. He wasn't jealous of Caldwell, by any means. But that had been a difficult time for he and Logan. The first time they hadn't been assigned to the same duty station, or lived in the same town in their whole life. Every time one of them could take leave for a visit, he could see the excitement in her eyes. She WANTED desperately to tell him what it was that had her so thrilled about her job at Cheyenne Mountain in the middle of no where-ville. He'd (apparently) foolishly resisted her suggestions that he somehow find a way to get transferred there, and her offers of trying to pave the way for him. He was happiest when he was flying, and he didn't feel there was a great need for pilots at Cheyenne Mountain.

It was just as he was finally entertaining the idea of a transfer that he'd broken the rules to save those servicemen in Afghanistan, and wound up freezing his six off at McMurdo. Logan never gave up on him, though. She'd lobbied hard, with General O'Neill, to get him re-assed to the SGC. That lobbying had been the reason that Sheppard, and not another pilot, had been the one flying O'Neill to the outpost in Antarctica, and led to him being included in the Atlantis expedition.

He'd never forget the look on Logan's face when she was finally able to tell him everything she'd been doing over the years they'd been at separate commands. When they learned that he possessed the Ancient gene, she'd been over the moon with happiness that he would have the chance to go to Atlantis. He'd been understandably shaken by all the revelations, and appeared hesitant to go along. It was only at Logan's insistence, and assurance, that she would go too, that he finally leaned toward joining the expedition.

But then there was that one last fateful mission she'd been sent on, to Afghanistan. To retrieve some stupid artifact! When he learned that she was gone, he couldn't get far enough away from Earth. Caldwell had been at her memorial service. He remembered that when he first blew into the Pegasus galaxy and literally fished his six out of the fire. If Caldwell hadn't appeared when he did, Sheppard would be dead, and he would have never been reunited with Logan.

Yeah... he owed Caldwell a lot.


	12. Chapter 12

In the three months following Caldwell's departure, she had come to recognize that, while she did love Steven Caldwell, she was not IN love with him, and that he was not, in all likelihood, in love with her either. They'd been two people who were extremely close, extremely lonely, and extremely in need of a good roll in the hay. Because of the trust that they shared, each had known that they would never betray the other. On a strictly professional level, Logan missed Caldwell alot. And, if he were being totally honest, Sheppard did too. She and Sheppard had assumed all of his former responsibilities, mainly paperwork which they both loathed. But they also missed his valuable insight and tactical brilliance at briefings or planning sessions for future missions. His maturity and experience had given him the ability to have a calming, somewhat steadying effect on all the people under his command.

"Colonel Sheppard, Colonel Devane, Dr. Weir to the control room." Came the call over the city's comm system.

"This is Devane, I'm on my way." she responded, followed immediately by Sheppard's and Weir's responses.

Weir was already there when she arrived and Sheppard was a step or two behind her.

"What's up?" Sheppard asked.

"Radio call from the Daedalus, Sir."

"Put it through, Sergeant."

"Go ahead, ma'am."

Weir keyed her mike while Sheppard and Logan listened in. "Daedalus, this is Dr. Weir, with Colonel's Sheppard and Devane."

"Greetings Doctor, Colonel's. This is Hermiod. I was hoping the three of you could meet with me, aboard the ship, if your schedules allowed it."

The three of them exchanged curious glances. "Now?" asked Sheppard.

"If you are available, it would be greatly appreciated."

Logan shrugged, as did Sheppard.

Weir nodded. "Very well, I think we can spare some time. When would you like to..."

A bright light cut her off in mid-sentence and Weir, Sheppard and Logan vanished from the control room. The others looked around in shock before Sergeant Green hit the alarm and summoned Major Lorne to the control room. On board the Daedalus, the three of them appeared in what looked like a conference room.

"...rendevous with the Daedalus..." Weir finished her sentence in a different place than she started it.

"I'd really love to have one of those for Atlantis," Weir mused after shaking her head at the sudden shift in location.

"All in good time, Doctor."

"So, what can we do for you, Hermiod?" Sheppard asked, still a little uneasy when in the presence of the Asgard.

At that moment, a hologram activated to their right.

"Thor!" called Logan exuberantly.

"Greetings Colonel Devane. It is good to see you again." Thor nodded.

"Likewise."

Sheppard whispered in her ear,"Someday you're gonna have to tell me how you can tell the difference between those guys."

Logan bit back a grin and kept her attention focused on Thor.

"Greetings also to you Doctor Weir and Colonel Sheppard."

"Greetings, Commander Thor. What can we do for you?" asked Weir.

"It is more a question of what I can do for you."

The three of them exchanged curious glances.

"General O'Neill has been most persistent in his requests for the Asgard's help in understanding and utilizing Ancient technologies, to assist in the protection of both your home galaxy and Pegasus."

"That sounds like him," Logan nodded.

"Specifically?" Weir asked.

"The Ancient power source. ZPM's I believe he called them?" Thor responded.

"YES!" shouted Logan and Sheppard together, pumping their fists in the air.

While it wasn't a big-honkin space gun, it was something that could ensure the safety of their people, both in Atlantis and back home on Earth.

"The Asgard would need access to the Ancient Database in Atlantis," he informed them.

"Of course, whatever you need," Weir quickly agreed.

"How did General O'Neill finally convince you to help us?" Sheppard asked.

"It was not as difficult as perhaps it once was. Humans have come a long way in the short time since the Asgard began interacting with them. We have already given you hyperdrive technology as well as shielding capabilities. General O'Neill convinced us that a more advanced power source would be the next logical step in your evolution." Thor explained.

"We can't thank you enough," Weir replied.

"Since you lack the necessary technology to actually build a... ZPM... The Asgard would have to build them for you," Hermiod chimed in.

Sheppard perked up at that. "Them? As in more than one?"

"We have agreed to supply several, to protect Atlantis and Earth from attack. It is our belief that, should the Wraith somehow manage to learn the location of your homeworld, they would eventually be able to make it there, with or without the Stargate. Countless worlds would be decimated if that were to happen," Thor told them.

"Agreed," Weir nodded.

"Therefore, we will build enough for you to power all the systems here in Atlantis, and enough to power Earth's defenses,"Hermiod nodded.

Sheppard sat forward, "Uh...Not to sound greedy or ungrateful, but what about a few extra? You know, in the event one or more is somehow damaged or something? And... We could replace the one other we know of here that's rapidly depleting and protecting a world full of children."

Logan finally spoke up. "He's right, Thor. We want to protect as many worlds as we can, not just ours. If we had enough ZPM's and could install protective shields on other worlds, we could finally give the Wraith a run for their money. They've been able to survive and thrive by keeping not only the human population down, but they're ensuring that whatever advances they make in between cullings, those advances are destroyed during the cullings. You know that, because the stargate on Earth was buried for so long, it gave us the chance to grow and evolve way beyond almost every world under Goa'uld rule. While our level of technology was nothing compared to theirs, we were still able to fight because of our numbers and the fact that we'd come so far."

"What you say is true," Thor nodded.

"Thor, we are so grateful for your help, I can't even tell you how much this would mean to us and we will gladly accept your offer to build us the ZPM's that we need..." Logan trailed off, her eyes straying to Sheppard, who nodded almost imperceptibly.

"However?" Thor prodded.

"However... Wouldn't you agree that it would be far more beneficial, for everyone, if you could teach us how to build the ZPM's?" she asked.

Weir nodded. "Give a man a fish, he feeds his family for a day, teach him to fish, he feeds them for a lifetime..." she murmured.

"I understand your point, Colonel Devane, and you're logic is not incorrect..." Thor mused.

"However...?" she prodded.

"As I said, you do not have the necessary technology," he replied.

"We can be taught," Sheppard cut in. "We have scientists, who if they do say so themselves, are extremely intelligent. They should be able to learn."

"I can make no promises, at this time but, I will take it up with the Asgard high council. In the meantime, if you will allow Hermiod to access the Ancient database, we can begin the process of building what you need."

"Hermiod is welcome in Atlantis any time," Weir assured him.

"Very well. I will take my leave of you now, to go and address the council. Colonel Sheppard, Dr. Weir, it was a pleasure to meet you. Colonel Devane, I was most pleased to discover that word of your demise had been greatly exaggerated. I hope we have many opportunities to speak again in the future."

"Thank you, Thor, so do I."

With a quick nod, he was gone and the three of them turned to Hermiod.

"So, when would you like to..." In a flash, all four of them were transported back to the city. "...come to Atlantis?" she blinked as the Atlantis control room appeared around her.

Sheppard motioned to the security team that all was well, and waited for them to retreat back to their posts.

Lorne stepped forward. "We were beginning to worry about you guys."

"Major Lorne, I don't believe you've had the pleasure, so allow me to introduce our Asgard friend, Hermiod. He's here to take a look at the Ancient database and offer some help in protecting the galaxy. Where's Dr. McKay?" Logan asked.

"Here!" McKay hurried in and came to a halt in front of their diminuitive friend. "What kind of help?" McKay looked like a kid at Christmas time.

"The Asgard have agreed to help us with an Ancient power source," Weir smiled.

McKay lit up. "You mean...?"

Sheppard and Logan both nodded, wide smiles on their faces.

"If you would be so kind as to show him the Ancient database on ZPM technology, Rodney?" Weir asked.

"Yes, of course!" He led Hermiod out of the control room, babbling incessantly and asking question after question.

"That was quite a convincing argument you gave back there, Colonel Devane. I'm glad you knew Commander Thor well enough to make a request that I WANTED to make, but didn't feel comfortable asking for just then."

"I'm sorry if I overstepped," she winced.

"Are you _kidding_? I meant what I said, I'm glad you spoke up!" Weir assured her.

"Me, too!" added Sheppard.

"I'm happy to help," she smiled.

Within two months, the Asgard had supplied both Earth and Lantea with enough ZPM's to power their respective defenses. The Asgard high council had further agreed to teach McKay and Carter, respectively, the technology they would need to build the ZPM's for themselves. McKay had been overjoyed by the prospect of working with Samantha Carter. Especially if it involved close-quartered working conditions. He'd been off with the Asgard for over a month already, and even Sheppard had to admit that things were not quite the same in Atlantis without him.

Now that they didn't have to concern themselves with using too much power, they established a routine of weekly briefings between Earth and Atlantis. Original remaining expedition team members had also been given the option of returning to Earth, either permanently or on leave. Only the people at the SGC, aside from Daniel and Teal'c, were surprised when each and every one of them opted to remain posted in Atlantis.

Logan and Sheppard were indulging in a rare day of relaxation, at their favorite beach on the mainland, when they were surprised by the sight of one of the jumpers flying right for them. Exchanging curious glances, they paddled for the shore to meet the new arrivals.

Neither could contain their surprise, or delight in Logan's case, at sight of the familiar figure who stepped out of the rear hatch of the jumper.

"General O'Neill!" they chorused together.

"Howdy campers!" he greeted.

Fortunately, he wasn't in uniform, so they didn't feel quite as self conscious in their swimsuits as they might have otherwise.

"How are the waves?" he asked.

"Sweet!" they replied in unison again.

"Do you two ever speak without the others' mouth moving?" he teased.

"Sometimes," they did it again.

O'Neill laughed and shook his head. "Like a couple of bookends, I tell ya!"

"This is a surprise, sir. No one told us you were coming, or we'd have been back at the base to meet you," Sheppard told him.

"See that? You CAN do it!" O'Neill clapped his hands together.

Sheppard grinned sheepishly, "Yes, sir."

"And to answer you, this was a bit of a last minute thing. People were coming, I just decided to tag along," he explained.

"Well, we're happy you did. Has anyone given you the tour yet?" Logan asked.

"I saw some of the city...Big place..." O'Neill grinned. He probably wouldn't admit it, but he was almost as intrigued by the city as Daniel.

Logan nodded, "Yes, it is."

"Anyway, they told me you were out here and I conned Sgt. Dawes into giving me a ride," he jerked a thumb in the direction of the jumper behind them.

Sheppard shrugged and reached for his shirt, "Well, if it's a tour of the mainland you're looking for, sir, we'd be happy to show you around."

"Great, I'll drive!" he started to walk away, then stopped and turned back. "I almost forgot, there are some personnel issues that need to be worked out back in the city. MILITARY personnel, so you can't dump it on Weir. One of you will have to cut your day off short."

Logan and Sheppard exchanged glances before Logan groaned and threw her hands up in defeat. "I'll do it," she groused.

"It IS your turn," he reminded her.

"I know, I know..." she grabbed her bag and threw her sundress on over her wet swimsuit. "Come on Sgt. Dawes, we have to go home."

O'Neill was doing his best not to smirk at her. "Sorry Colonel. One of the perks of command."

She grimaced and managed to salute. "Welcome to Atlantis, sir. It's nice to see you again." she said, genuinely meaning it.

"Thanks! We'll see you later." he smiled.

Sheppard and O'Neill watched the resigned and only slightly muttering Logan trudge her way to the waiting jumper and walk up the ramp.

"There's gonna be hell to pay," O'Neill chuckled.

"Don't I know it!" Sheppard agreed.

O'Neill surveyed his surroundings appreciatively. "Nice spot," he observed.

"My favorite," Sheppard admitted.

"Now I know why none of your people wanted to stay back on Earth," he quipped.

"Yeah, well, the place kinda grows on you, sir."

"I can see that."

O'Neill helped Sheppard gather up their belongings and load it all in the jumper.

"Where to first, sir?" Sheppard asked.

"How about introducing me to your Athosian friends first and then a quick trip around the planet?"

"After you?" he motioned to the pilot's seat.

O'Neill took the chair and watched as the panels all began to light up. "That just never gets old..."

Logan reluctantly made her way downstairs toward the control room, but ended up waylaid by a rowdy group of Athosian children intent on dragging her with them to the gym. Music was blaring from the sound system when they pulled her into the room. She saw Teyla and Kitah leading the others in a song and they waved her over. She tried to mask her tendency to stiffen up every time she came into contact with the young Athosian woman, which had gotten a little easier with time. That and the fact that she seemed to hold no ill will toward her or Sheppard for the deaths of her brothers. She'd apologized profusely again and again upon learning the extent of Jarom's misdeeds, and appeared deeply ashamed of what he'd done.

"Teach us another song, Colonel?" pleaded Mikah, a young girl of about five years old.

"I'm supposed to be working right now, kids." she said regretfully.

A chorus of disappointed "NO's" weakened her.

"Alright, but just a quick one," she relented and walked over to where Teyla was standing to pick up a guitar. The children clapped and cheered as she grabbed a chair and took a seat in front of them.

"Okay, let's see..." she began as she checked the instrument to make sure it was properly tuned.

So caught up in her song and the children that she was completely oblivious to the other two who watched from the shadows. One set of eyes, in particular, never left her face as she laughed and sang with the children. How was it that he never knew how beautifully she could sing?

His companion nudged him and whispered in his ear. "You described her in such glowing terms, and still you didn't do her justice."

He shrugged and looked down at his companion. "I told you I couldn't."

"I understand now."

"I thought you might."

Twenty minutes later, Logan finally made her way to the control room, where she was told that the six new transfers were waiting for her in the conference room. Once she had finished getting their paperwork completed and quarters assigned, she headed straight for her own quarters to shower and change clothes. She sensed immediately upon opening the door that she was not alone. It took only a moment for her to find her "visitor" in the fading light, but the shock of recognition seemed to leave her rooted to where she stood for an interminable time. The two of them faced one another across the room without moving. The telltale hiss of the door closing was enough to snap Logan out of her stunned silence. She bounded across the room and launched herself into his outstretched arms.

"Steve!" she whispered.

Caldwell held her close against him, breathing in her familiar scent and it was almost enough to make him lose his resolve. With a strength of will he didn't know he possessed, he pulled back and took her hands in his.

"How are you, Logan?" he croaked.

"I'm fine," she shook her head, still stunned at seeing him. " What are you doing here?"

There wasn't a hint of reproach in her voice or in her eyes. She was smiling, clearly happy to see him.

"I wanted to tell you in private... I've been reassigned... here...again," he informed her.

Her eyes widened, but not in dismay or dread. "That's _great_!" she squealed, hugging him again.

"I'm...uh...glad you think so."

"Why wouldn't I?" she asked, suddenly sensing something off about him.

"The way I left things... with you... Logan, that wasn't exactly my finest moment," he winced.

"I hope you haven't been kicking yourself over that all this time!"

"I have."

"Well, _stop_. I don't regret anything that happened between us, and it's not like we took anything too far..."

"No?" he interrupted her.

"No."

"There's something else I need to tell you." Now he looked REALLY uncomfortable.

"As long as you're not planning on telling me that I'VE been reassigned..." she only sort of joked.

"No! No, not at all."

She studied his face for a beat before speaking again. "What is it then?"

He motioned for her to sit down, and when he did, her hand felt something cold and hard brush against it. She looked down and was surprised to find a simple gold band on his left ring finger. She looked up at him in shock. "You...got...married?" she asked.

"I did," he nodded.

"Um...okay... _wow_..." she shook her head and decided to take that seat after all.

"I told myself that I wasn't going to go into the specifics surrounding my...marriage, but I think I owe you that much."

"You don't OWE me anything, Steve."

"Sure I do."

"Okay then. Tell me about this whirlwind romance of yours."

"Do you remember me talking about my brother, Samuel?"

She nodded.

"He died just after I arrived back on Earth, that's apparently one of the reasons I was called home."

She gasped softly and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Oh God, Steve, I'm so sorry, I know how close you were to him."

He closed his eyes and buried his face in the curve of her neck, but just for a moment. "Thank you. It was tough there for a while... Anyway, I had to help settle his estate and be there to support his wife."

"Shannon, right?"

He nodded, "Yes. She's a scientist, did I ever tell you that?" she shook her head negatively. "She's been doing a lot of work for the government, and we spent a lot of time together..."

"Steve..." she trailed off, her eyes wide in shock. "You married your brother's widow?!"

He nodded again. "I know what that sounds like, but it was the perfect arrangement for both of us."

"Arrangement? You make it sound like a business deal instead of a marriage."

"Yeah, well...It kind of was," he nodded sheepishly.

"Say what?"

"I know I'm not explaining this very well... Look, she was all alone, I was alone. I swore to my brother, before he died, that I would take care of her..."

"Do you really think he meant for you to _marry_ her?" she cringed.

"Actually, yeah...He didn't come right out and _say_ it, but he knew that I had no plans to marry again and I'm sure he knew I would be there for her..."

"I see."

"Do you?"

"Yeah, sure...You married out of a sense of duty, but not love..."

"Logan, you and I would have never worked. Neither one of us wanted to give up our careers to explore something...permanent. Not to mention the fact that one or both of us would have been transferred out of Atlantis, and I KNOW you didn't want that."

"I know it wouldn't have worked between us, Steve. I wasn't even going to suggest that we take up where we left off. But, I don't understand one thing: If you married her to take care of her, why leave her back there alone?"

"I didn't."

"Beg pardon?"

He took a deep breath and plunged in with the last of it. "She's here."

"Here?"

"She'll be working in the lab."

Logan stared incredulously at him. "Here."

"She's very good at what she does."

"She'd have to be, wouldn't she?" Logan rolled her eyes at him.

"I'm sorry to just show up and dump all this on you like this."

She waved nonchalantly. "It's fine. I mean, I'm surprised, but it's not really any of my business."

"Logan..."

"No, really, honestly. Things are back the way they're supposed to be. Everything is fine... Better than fine, because, you know, with you back in Atlantis as ranking military officer, that frees both Colonel Sheppard and I from the boring, beaurocratic stuff like paperwork and you know, things..."

"Logan..."

"Steve, really... Believe me, I am happy you're here. Everyone has missed you, seriously. I want everything to work out for you, I really do, and I hope it does and that you can be happy with the choice you've made. Shannon... Caldwell...I guess she wouldn't have to change her name, right? Anyway, she's a VERY lucky woman, and I hope she knows that."

"Logan, please..." Nope, this was not going well.

"Please what? I mean it, I'm _very_ happy for you. I'm happy for _me_! Back to business as usual, right?" She knew her pitch was a bit too high and her smile a little too bright.

He grew silent and looked away for a moment before answering her. He'd known that this wouldn't be easy, but he hadn't wanted her to learn about it through regular channels or in a meeting. They'd been friends for far too long for him to blindside her that way.

"Right," he murmured.

"And while we're on the subject of business as usual..."

"Yes," he stood up and turned toward her.

"Welcome back, Steve. I'm looking forward to working with you, again."

"Thank you. I'd better get back then, I have a meeting scheduled with Dr. Weir."

"I appreciate you coming to tell me yourself. Thank you." She walked over to the door and passed her hand over the control. He stopped in the doorway and looked down into her eyes for a long moment. She smiled up at him and then turned away.

"I'll be seeing you around, Colonel. And I look forward to meeting the missus!"


	13. Chapter 13

Logan took a few deep breaths and tried to maintain her composure. What the heck was WRONG with her? She knew that things would never work between herself and Steve Caldwell. She wasn't even in love with the man, for crying out loud! So why had it hit her like a ton of bricks when he told her he'd gotten married? Before she could answer herself, the door slid open again and Sheppard stormed into the room. He took one look at her face and then gathered her into his arms.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"I guess you heard."

"O'Neill filled me in on everything..."

She pulled away and looked up at him with a panic-stricken expression. "You didn't blow up in front of him, did you?!"

"No... I kept my cool. What did Caldwell do to you now?" he demanded.

"What did he...? John...You're not implying that he would physically hurt me...?"

He shook his head negatively. "No, I know he wouldn't do that."

"Good."

"So...it's...what? That he got married, right?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

She nodded hesitantly. "How petty and pathetic am I?"

"Why would you even think that?" he asked, genuinely confused.

He'd known that she would feel SOME hurt, when she heard the news. I mean it had only been six months since the two of them...He stopped that thought before it could form completely. He did NOT want to go there...

"Why should I begrudge him anything? It's not like we had any kind of commitment or anything, we weren't even in love..." she trailed off, feeling even more selfish.

"Soooo?" he prodded.

"No woman wants to think that she could be so easily replaced..." she admitted shamefully. "How petty and self-centered is THAT?"

Sheppard pulled her close again and held her tight. "You don't really believe that, do you? That she's taken your place?"

"Yeah..well...No... I dunno," she murmured.

"You got under his skin, Sparks. Once you do that, a hundred wives couldn't take your place," he informed her.

"Wow..." she pulled back to look at him with tear filled eyes. "That was an incredibly sweet thing to say."

"It's the truth. Did you ever stop to think that maybe he married her so he could stay away from you?"

"Huh?" she was a little confused.

"I don't think he trusted himself not to cross that line again. If he's married, that makes it a little easier for him to keep his distance," he deduced.

"Are you trying to suggest that I'm some kind of irresistible seductress?" she laughed out loud at that image.

"You don't see it, do you?" he shook his head at her. She never could.

"What?" she stared blankly up at him.

"Logan, sweetie, I've told you...how many times...? YOU don't have to DO anything to hook a man. You're so incredibly... beautiful... and you have this natural magnetism surrounding you. Your warmth and your spirit...You are so completely unaware of the effect you have on men...Even the ones falling right at your feet, left and right... Look, I know I was mad at the guy for... but the truth of the matter is... He never stood a snowballs' chance in hell of resisting your considerable charms."

He looked away sheepishly, visibly uncomfortable.

"Aren't you just full of it today?" she teased. She knew he meant every word he'd just said, but she also knew how uncomfortable it made him to think of her in those terms.

"For your information, flyboy, he married her because he made a promise to his brother that he would take care of her..."

"His brother? He married his brother's wife?"

"It's not as bad as it sounds."

He didn't look so sure of that. "If you say so..."

That evening at dinner, O'Neill regaled them all with news from Earth, and several changes that had occurred in regards to staffing and promotions. General O'Neill was now the Co-Head of Homeworld Security, along with General Hammond, and General Landry, personally selected by O'Neill, had taken over the reigns of the SGC. With Carter gone to work on the ZPM technology along with McKay, O'Neill had brought in Colonel Cameron Mitchell to lead SG-1.

Logan was acquainted with Colonel Mitchell, mainly by reputation, though she'd met him once, before the invasion Anubis launched against Earth. It was during that invasion that Mitchell had truly made a name for himself; within the confines of the SGC anyway. Still, she knew that Mitchell's assignment to the SGC's flagship unit had to be an adjustment for Daniel and Teal'c. As it would be for Carter, upon her return.

Although she'd been dreading this all afternoon, Logan was pleased to find that she was actually enjoying herself and completely at ease. Even when Caldwell arrived, with his new bride in tow. She felt a momentary pang when she first saw Shannon Caldwell, as she hadn't expected her to be so...pretty? She was extremely intelligent, which Logan had expected, but she was also very warm and friendly, which Logan had NOT expected.

Fortunately, she was the only one who noticed the guarded tension between Sheppard and Caldwell that evening. That was only because she knew both of them so well. By the time everyone was ready to retire after dinner, the tension between them had lessened enough so that both men could enjoy themselves. Perhaps the showdown the two men had earlier had cleared the air enough for them to put past events behind them. Sheppard had assured her that their confrontation hadn't become physical.

EARLIER

Caldwell found Sheppard in the gym after he left Logan's quarters. He was working out with boxing gloves and a heavy bag. As a boxer himself, Caldwell was surprised that he and Sheppard shared another interest (aside from Logan) in common.

"Colonel," Sheppard nodded at him.

"Sheppard."

"Something I can do for you, sir?" The hostility in his voice was unmistakable.

"I thought we could clear the air, since we're going to be working together again."

"How's Logan?" he asked, punching the bag forcefully.

"She's...alright. We talked...about everything."

"Good."

"I wanted to thank you, for being there for her."

"I did that for her, sir, not for you."

"I'm acutely aware of that. Nevertheless, I wanted to thank you anyway," he sighed. "And I'm sure that YOU have a few things you need to get off your chest now?"

Sheppard stopped hitting the bag and looked directly at Caldwell. He had to respect the guy for opening himself that way. "Oh, I've had a lot of things I wanted to say to you over the past few months, sir..."

"I'm here."

Sheppard looked at him thoughtfully. "I'm not as angry as I was, which frankly surprises the hell outta me, cuz I was pretty damned angry. And as much as I hate to admit it, Logan was right about there being no point in dwelling on things that can't be changed."

"And yet?" Caldwell prodded.

"Look, sir, this IS all off the record, right?"

Caldwell nodded in response.

"As long as Logan is okay, I'M okay. She's a little better at forgiving than I am, especially when it comes to anyone hurting her but, she's okay now. And she'll stay that way as long as you leave her alone."

Caldwell looked him straight in the eye. "I can assure you, Sheppard, that I have no intention of repeating any of the mistakes I made, or putting Logan in any compromising position ever again."

"I'm sure your wife will appreciate that as much as I do, sir," he knew that was impertinent, but he couldn't help himself.

"I'm sure." Caldwell muttered.

"That having been said, sir. I am glad to have you back."

Caldwell was nonplussed to hear that. "You're...glad..."

"Look, I've always respected you, and I thought we had a pretty good understanding of each other, a trust, as well as a good working rapport. You're a damned fine leader, Colonel, and we've missed you around here."

Caldwell arched an eyebrow skeptically. "Paperwork?"

Sheppard snorted and shook his head. "Not JUST paperwork... Anyway, to be completely honest, if it were anyone, other than Logan, I might not be SO critical. I know that's hypocritical of me, but I'm often hypocritical when it comes to Logan...The point is, you and I both know that fraternization does happen and will continue to happen, especially in close quarters like this. I understand what it is you saw in her, Colonel, what any man sees in her. I understand how hard it must have been for you NOT to respond to her when you saw that she returned your...interest."

Caldwell nodded, "She's the most amazing woman I've ever known."

"Me too." Sheppard nodded. "Which is why she deserves better than she's gotten the last few years."

"No argument there," Caldwell agreed wholeheartedly.

"Then we're agreed? As long as Logan doesn't get hurt again, you and I have no problems?"

Sheppard extended his hand toward Caldwell, who responded by extending his own in as firm a handshake as boxing gloves would allow.

"You have my word."

The sudden blaring of an alarm sounded from the control room brought Logan out of her reverie. O'Neill, who had been walking down the hall, snapped his fingers and turned back.

"Did I forget to mention that you'd be having more visitors?"

"IDC is verified, Colonel Caldwell."

Caldwell nodded, "Lower the shield," he ordered, as Logan, Sheppard, Teyla, Weir and O'Neill stood by.

Teyla was fairly quivering at Logan's side as she saw the the form of Teal'c step through the event horizon. He was followed closely by Daniel Jackson and then Mitchell.

Caldwell stepped forward, "Gentlemen, welcome to Atlantis."

"Thank you, sir," Mitchell replied.

"How was the trip, kids?" O'Neill asked.

"Uneventful, General O'Neill." replied Teal'c.

"Good. Well then, I'm sure you all want to get settled. You missed dinner, but Colonel Caldwell has arranged quarters for all of you, so feel free to scatter like field mice and I'll see you in the morning!" With that, O'Neill excused himself and breezed down the hall.

"Well, I think everybody knows everyone here, with the possible exception of Colonel Mitchell... Colonel this is Colonel Sheppard, Colonel Devane, Dr. Elizabeth Weir, and Teyla Emmagen."

Mitchell stepped forward and shook everyone's hand as they were introduced in a line. "It's nice to meet you all," he said.

With Mitchell standing next to Daniel, Logan was struck by how closely he resembled her former boyfriend. Not identically so, but the resemblance was striking, to say the least.

"You...I KNOW I've met before," Mitchell said to her.

"I remember," she smiled up at him.

"This place is incredible," he said in awe as he took in the sights around him.

"It gets better," she assured him.

"So I've heard. I don't suppose I could convince you to show me around some tonight?" he asked.

Logan checked her watch and saw that it was still early enough for a quick tour. She was sure Mitchell wouldn't be able to sleep anyway.

"I'd be happy to," she smiled. "I'll take you by your quarters first, so you can stow your gear and then we can go on from there."

"Great!" he said.

As she began leading him away, she looked back at Sheppard and Daniel. Both were scowling a little.

"Anyone else coming?"

Neither of them hesitated. "Oh _yeah_..." they replied in unison.

Sheppard stole a furtive glance at Caldwell and saw that his jaw was set and rigid. He covered it well, but Sheppard could see that he wasn't thrilled by Mitchell's apparently instant attraction to Logan.

Teal'c looked down at Teyla before responding. "I believe I will remain here," he announced.

"I will keep you company then," Teyla grinned.

An hour later, the little group had completed a short tour of the area immediately surrounding the control tower.

"Colonel Sheppard could tell you more about this place than I ever could," she announced as she led Mitchell into the jumper bay.

His eyes widened and lit up in awe at the sight of the jumpers all lined up together. Even with everything he'd read or been told, it still wasn't enough to prepare him for everything he'd seen so far.

"Wow," was all he could manage.

"That was pretty much my reaction, too," said Sheppard.

Actually, anyone with any flight experience had that same visceral reaction.

"Have you been tested for the Ancient gene?" she asked.

Mitchell nodded, "I received the gene therapy back on Earth, but I haven't had a chance to try and fly one of these yet."

He looked hopefully over at Sheppard, who nodded. "I'll take you up tomorrow," he told a delighted Mitchell.

He'd be damned if he didn't like the guy after all. As long as he didn't try hitting on Logan, they'd get along just fine.

"Well, gentlemen, if you'll excuse me, I think I have a date with my bed now," she yawned.

"I'll walk back with you," Daniel offered first, looping her hand through his arm to escort her.

"Alright... Colonel Mitchell, Colonel Sheppard, I'll see you both in the morning."

"Good night," they chimed together.

The two pilots watched them go until they were out of sight. Then Mitchell looked sideways at Sheppard.

"She's uh..."

"Unavailable," he grinned.

"No, I meant...What?" he shook his head.

"Were you aware that she and Daniel were once an item?" Sheppard asked pointedly.

"I must have missed that memo," said Mitchell.

Funny.

"I'm not sure Daniel's ever really gotten over her."

"And what about you?" Mitchell eyed him curiously.

"What about me?"

"Have you gotten over her?" Mitchell wondered.

Sheppard broke into a wide grin. " _That_ woman is the closest thing to family I have, Mitchell. Has been since birth, and I'm _very_ protective of her."

Mitchell grinned right back. "I'm sure she appreciates it."

"Not in the least," he replied with a snort.

The following morning, Logan had only enough time to wish them a good day as she was on her way to the control room.

"Sorry you slept so late, I've got a mission..." she informed them in passing.

Mitchell seemed to be torn between wanting to go with her and his desire to get his hands on one of the jumpers, but in the end he really didn't have a choice. There was no time for him to gear up and accompany Logan and her team. He followed Sheppard to the cafeteria and enjoyed a leisurely breakfast with he, Daniel, and the clearly smitten Teyla and Teal'c. After breakfast, Teal'c and Teyla excused themselves to go for a walk while Sheppard, Mitchell and Daniel made their way to the jumper bay. Sheppard had offered to drop Daniel off on the mainland so he could visit with the Athosians while Mitchell received his first flying lesson.

Sheppard and Mitchell spent the entire day in the jumper, easily slipping into the camaraderie of fellow pilots. They had a lot of other things in common, including a love of ferris wheels, which both found downright hysterical. By the time they returned to the mainland to pick up Daniel, the two men were on their way to becoming friends. Most of that was a conscious effort on both of their parts NOT to discuss Logan Devane.

Back in Atlantis, Caldwell, with General O'Neill in attendance, was just finishing up the briefing with Logan and her team.

"They really did a number on the place, sir. It was several hours before we were able to find any survivors."

"And they still refused to come back with you?" Caldwell asked.

"Yes sir. They wanted to stay and rebuild. They said they weren't going to let the Wraith win," she shrugged.

"Well then, let's see what we can do to help them with that," he turned to O'Neill as if to ask if he had any further questions, but O'Neill shrugged and put up his hands. "Okay people, call it a day."

O'Neill pulled Logan aside for a moment before leaving the conference room. "Haven't had much chance to chat with you yet, Colonel."

She smiled up at him brightly, "You're a popular guy, sir."

"So it would seem," he winced. "You appear to be doing very well," he noted.

"Yes, sir. I love my job!"

"Good to hear, good to hear. Of course I guess that means that you won't be wanting to come back to the SGC anytime soon?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Not really sir, I'm VERY happy here," she said unequivocally.

"Don't worry, Colonel, I have no intention of pulling you out...At least not any time in the near future."

"I can't tell you how relieved I am to hear you say that," she sighed with relief.

"Yeah well, you caught me on a good day. Make some time to chat with me before I have to leave in the morning?"

"Absolutely, sir." she promised.

She smiled to herself as she watched him walk out the door and was about to turn around to say something to Caldwell when someone else walked in.

"Oh, excuse me, am I interrupting anything?"

Logan cleared her throat and inched her way toward the door. "Not at all, Doctor. The meeting just broke up," she saluted Caldwell and then hurried out the door.

"I'm sorry Steve, I didn't mean to chase her away."

"You didn't," he assured her.

"But that IS what you brought me here to do, isn't it?" she came over to stand before him, compassion lighting her eyes.

"Shannon, I..."

She put up a hand to cut him off. "It's alright Steve. I knew what I was getting into when you first told me about her. And you really do have it bad, don't you?"

His only response was a shrug.

"You never said...Does she KNOW how you feel about her? She seems completely oblivious to the effect she has on men, which I'm sure only adds to her allure." she said that in a totally non-judgmental way.

"No, she doesn't know, and she never needs to know," he said.

"Because you don't want to put her in an awkward position."

"Because, even if she felt the same way, it would be strictly against regulations and we'd torpedo our careers. Now, despite your matchmaking ways, I am perfectly content to stand by our decision to get married."

"That one, is not going to be so easy to forget, my dear," she warned.

"I don't intend to forget her, Shannon, but I do intend to get over her."

"I can't decide if you're a fool or a martyr."

"I'm just a man, Shannon. Nothing more, nothing less."

Logan retreated to her quarters to change and grab her MP3 player before heading to the armory to conduct her weekly inventory. She didn't know why she felt so...twitchy...in Shannon Caldwell's presence. She really did seem to be a lovely person. She wasn't jealous of the woman, per se, which she wasn't entirely sure WASN'T very odd. Steve had told her that Shannon was aware of their friendship, not of the boundaries they'd crossed, but she wasn't so sure that Shannon hadn't sensed something. Women tended to be more aware of those types of "vibes" than men were. For now, she thought it best to just keep her distance.

Mitchell was walking down the hall, toward his temporary quarters when he heard music coming from somewhere at the end of the hall. Curious, he followed the sound until he reached, what he recognized to be the armory. He was taken further aback when he heard a woman's voice singing, at the top of her lungs, no less. Intrigued, he opened the door and went inside. What he saw and heard took his breath away.

Logan, dressed in cammies and a t-shirt, was dancing around, with a computer tablet in her hands. She was completely unaware of his presence, so wrapped up was she in the music. She had an amazing voice, he noted, but what really struck him was how incredibly beautiful she was, lost in her total abandon. Part of him knew he shouldn't just stand there watching her, but he felt physically incapable of moving. How in hell, with all his wisdom and intelligence, had Daniel Jackson let her get away from him?! He stood there, silent and unmoving, mesmerized until the music died down and she stopped singing, her siren's spell broken. Almost without thinking, he began to applaud and she froze.

"I have never seen ANYONE enjoy taking inventory so much in my entire life," he grinned.

Logan turned to face him, blushing furiously but looking him square in the eyes. "You caught me."

"And I'm glad I did. That was...very...entertaining, and enlightening."

One eyebrow shot up questioningly, "Enlightening? How's that?"

"I learned more about you in those few minutes that you might reveal to someone in...oh, months, or more."

She chuckled nervously, "And what did you learn, Colonel Mitchell?"

"Let's see... First, that you revert to formality when feeling flustered, embarrassed and probably angry. Second, that you have an amazing singing voice," she bowed appreciatively at that. "Third, that you can cut quite a rug, and look INCREDIBLY beautiful doing it. And fourth, despite everything you've been through, and I know that's been ALOT, you have a really free and joyful spirit."

Logan just stared at him for a moment before replying. "You got all that from a little song and dance?"

"I did."

"Oh." Was all she could say.

"Of course, the 'beautiful' part I already knew, you know? From the first time we met."

Logan forced herself not to giggle nervously in front of him. Then, for some reason, she called him on what he said. "Are you FLIRTING with me, Colonel Mitchell?" she asked, still red in the face.

"I was trying to, Colonel Devane. But I must be doing something wrong if you have to ask!" he chuckled.

Now she laughed. "No, not really. Actually you must be doing it right, because John - Colonel Sheppard - has always told me that I never pick up on it when guys flirt with me...But you? Something just told me that you were."

"Good, I feel better then."

"Why?"

"Why?" he looked at her curiously. "Why was I flirting with you?"

"Yeah."

He looked like he'd been hit with a truck. "Why...? Why does ANY man flirt with you? I mean, where do I start...?"

She held up a hand to stop him. "I'm not fishing for compliments here, Colonel. It's just that, we're both military..."

"Of equal rank, and we're not under the same command," he reminded her.

"True, but then that would be another point, wouldn't it? You're leaving in a few days, and not just to another city, to another galaxy...Why would you even waste your time and _considerable_ charm on someone so... out of reach?"

"Charm, eh? You think I have considerable charm?" he was inordinately pleased to hear that.

"Charm, yes. Common sense, no!" she chuckled.

"I've found that common sense tends to get in the way, sometimes." he grinned devilishly.

"Let me ask you something?"

"Sure, anything."

"Hasn't my pit-bull of a best friend and guard-dog warned you off of me at all?"

"You're referring to Colonel Sheppard?"

She nodded affirmatively.

"Actually, yes. He did tell me that you were unavailable, before I even asked, by the way, though that probably doesn't surprise you, does it?"

"Not a bit."

"And do you always do what your guard-dog tells you to?"

THAT made her laugh. "Much to his chagrin, no."

"Good. Then come have a picnic with me?"

"A what?" she stopped laughing now.

"Come on! We can pack up something for dinner, you can let me get in some more practice flying the jumper and we can find a nice spot on the mainland to set down and have a picnic. What do you say?"


	14. Chapter 14

It was well past ten o'clock by the time Mitchell saw Logan to her quarters after their "date". She had to admit that she had enjoyed herself. Cameron Mitchell was charming, clever, witty, and very intelligent. They'd found a nice, secluded beach, different than the one where she and Sheppard always went to surf. It was nice hearing about Earth and the people back home. There were some things she missed, but on the whole, she admitted to him that she could happily spend the next twenty years or so here on Lantea, without a second thought.

She told him all about the worlds they'd visited and the people they'd encountered. She described, in haunting detail what it was like to be face-to-face with a Wraith. Words were not enough, she warned, to accurately describe the feeling of utter helplessness when you were hit with a wraith stunner. Or the terror they all shared at the notion of the Wraith gaining access to Earth one day.

She readily agreed to allow him to accompany her team on their mission the following morning, provided Colonel Caldwell agreed. He was so eager to see something, anything of what she'd described.

Logan yawned wearily as he walked her to her quarters. She was surprisingly relaxed in his presence, given that she hadn't known him very long. Perhaps it was the same thing that had been been creeping, unbidden, several times during the evening. The strong physical resemblance he bore to Daniel Jackson. He was a distinctly different man, though they did share some of the same ideals. He seemed familiar to her because of those similarities, and maybe that was why she felt so at ease around him.

"Thank you, for letting me take you out."

"Thank you for asking, and for showing me a good time." she smiled around another yawn.

"I guess I shouldn't have kept you out so late."

"Sorry. It's not the company though. And I really did have a good time."

He smiled happily. "Good. Maybe you won't make me work so hard next time?" he teased.

"Maybe," she smiled.

"I'll say goodnight then," he seemed reluctant to leave her though.

"Goodnight, Cameron."

"Goodnight Logan," he whispered.

She opened the door and he turned to leave, then thought better of it.

"Logan?"

"Mmmmm?"

He reached out and took her face in his hands and kissed her softly on the lips. He wanted to linger there, to hold the kiss as long as possible, but he knew it was too early for that. He forced himself to break the kiss and pulled back to smile down at her.

"I'll see you in the morning,"

"N'Kay," she murmured.

She stepped inside and let the door slide shut.

"You have GOT to be kidding me!"

Logan jumped about a foot in the air.

"Dammit John! Don't DO that!" she yelped.

"Sparky, what the hell are you doing?"

"I was gonna get ready for bed, I'm tired."

He gave her one of *those* looks and she knew she wouldn't be able to dodge the issue tonight.

"Come on John, it was just dinner and conversation."

He snorted derisively. "Yeah, sure... You think I haven't seen the way he looks at you?"

"I know you have. He told me that you already warned him off, not that he NEEDED to tell me."

"Apparently he didn't HEAR me," he growled.

"John please... I had fun...You remember fun? He gave me a chance to just be a girl. Not a soldier, not a medic, just a girl. It was...nice."

"What is it you see in him, Sparks? Daniel?" he asked.

"No! I mean, sure...he looks a lot like Daniel, they even have some traits and ideals in common, but he's very much an individual."

"I know he is, I wasn't so sure YOU did."

"I'm not still hung up on Daniel."

"Are you getting hung up on Mitchell?"

"No."

He eyed her skeptically. "You let him kiss you."

"It was just a little peck. I promise you, John, I'm not about to fall for anyone right now. Not Daniel, not Cameron, not Steven Caldwell. Now will you let me go to sleep?" she pleaded with him.

"I just don't want you to get hurt."

"I don't want to get hurt either. Now kiss me goodnight and lemme get some sleep!"

He leaned down and kissed the tip of her nose. "Sweet dreams, Sparky."

"Sweet dreams, flyboy. I'll see you in the morning."

"Atlantis, this is Bates. We're coming in hot!"

Weir wasted no time waiting for Caldwell to arrive. "Lower the shield,"

The long familiar stunner blasts peppered the gateroom as Logan's team trickled through the stargate one by one. Caldwell arrived and began barking orders to secure the room.

"Where are Colonel's Devane and Mitchell?" he hollered at Bates.

"Right behind us, sir."

Logan and Mitchell were, at that moment, racing at breakneck speed for the open gate, pausing only momentarily to return fire in order to keep the Wraith from overtaking and passing them into the event horizon. Logan turned in time to see a Wraith point and fire directly at Mitchell's back. She knew she couldn't possibly stop and drag him back through the gate without the Wraith catching up to her, so she did the only thing she could, under the circumstances. She threw her body directly into the path of the stunner beam, and took the full force of the blast.

By this time, Mitchell had turned to look for her and was horrified to see her crumple to the ground. Without missing a beat, he came back, picked her up, threw her over his shoulder and ran for the gate. Two more blasts narrowly missed his head, but he made it through without further incident.

"Raise the shield!" he heard Caldwell shout. He keyed his mic and called out, "Medical team to the gateroom!"

Mitchell gingerly placed Logan on the floor, still cradling her in his arms as Caldwell and the others came rushing forward. "What happened?" an angry Caldwell demanded.

"She took a hit from one of those stunner things," Mitchell replied.

They stood aside to let Beckett and his team take her gingerly from Mitchell's arms and place her on a gurney to be taken to the infirmary. As much as he wanted to go with her, he knew he couldn't.

"Briefing. Conference room. Now!" Caldwell said in a clipped angry tone to the rest of Logan's team. "That includes YOU too, Colonel Mitchell," he said when he saw Mitchell begin to follow Beckett's team.

He hesitated for a moment, then reluctantly followed Caldwell upstairs.

"What about survivors?"

"There weren't any, sir. We checked out all three villages we knew about, while we were playing hide and seek with the Wraith, but there were none left. We were lucky that we managed to get back to the gate, after leading them on a wild goose chase and doubling back. Colonel Devane was hit just steps before the gate. I think she took that blast for me, sir." Mitchell reported.

"That sounds like Devane." Caldwell growled.

"How close were you to the gate as opposed to the Wraith?" asked Daniel.

"They were just steps behind us."

"She had to know that she wouldn't have time to try and drag you through the gate, but figured you'd have no trouble carrying her. She wouldn't have risked you being taken by the Wraith, or them getting through to Atlantis."

"No, she wouldn't," agreed Caldwell. "Okay then, if that's all you have?" he looked around the room, waiting to see if anyone else had anything to add. "We're adjourned." he stood up and headed straight for the door.

Mitchell caught up to him on the way to the infirmary.

"She was right." he mumbled.

"What's that, Colonel?"

"Colonel Devane, she tried to warn me that the Wraith were a lot scarier up close and in person than on a mission report. I thought they sounded pretty damned scary on the reports I read, but..." he trailed off, knowing that Caldwell knew exactly what he meant.

"The written word doesn't really do them justice, I know."

"She's going to be okay, though, right? The effects will wear off soon..."

Caldwell nodded. "Recovery time varies depending on the intensity of the blast, but she's gonna be mad as hell when she wakes up."

"At me?" he asked.

"No...Just in general. I haven't experienced the effect for myself, so far, not that I'd like to, but from everything I've been told, it's not a very pleasant feeling."

They arrived at the infirmary and went inside to find Beckett. He was standing by Logan's bed, checking her vital signs.

"Doctor."

"Colonel Caldwell."

"How's she doing?"

"Looks like she took a full blast. It'll be a while before she wakes up, but she'll be fine."

Everything inside of him was screaming to hold her, but he never let it show. "Just so you know, Sheppard is due back in an hour or so..."

"I've been expecting him since I first heard it was her," Beckett chuckled.

Mitchell watched and listened to their exchange without speaking. Apparently the extent of her friendship with Sheppard was well known to everyone on Atlantis. He wondered how it was that Caldwell had permitted the two to work so closely together in the face of that knowledge. He was glad, for their sake that he DID allow it, but he was still surprised nonetheless.

As predicted, an hour later, Sheppard burst through the door and found Mitchell sitting at her bedside, his head resting on the bed next to her, and her hand held tightly in his own.

"How is she?" he demanded.

"She's okay, but she hasn't woken up yet." Mitchell replied groggily.

"I can take it from here," he said pointedly.

"I was hoping to be here when she woke up, John. She saved my life today," he shook his head to clear away the fog.

"So I heard. But just so you know, she's gonna be REALLY grumpy when she does wake up," he warned.

True to their word, a highly annoyed Logan woke up as the effects of the stunner blast finally began to abate. Although unable to speak, he could see the fire in her eyes. Her anger hadn't been directed at him, but rightly so at the Wraith. Sheppard had fallen asleep by her side, a by now familiar sight in the infirmary. Mitchell simply happened to be standing near the bed when her eyes popped open.

She looked inquiringly at him, as though asking if everyone were alright. He smiled at her, warm and reassuring, and told her that everyone had made it back safely, thanks to her. He also whispered thanks for her selfless act in saving his life, and planted a soft kiss on her forehead. Though he spoke in hushed tones, it wasn't enough to keep Sheppard from waking.

His head popped up and his eyes locked on hers. For a brief moment, it was as if they were communicating on some deeper, silent level. A level only the two of them could find. The moment passed when Sheppard broke into a wide grin.

"Welcome back, Sparky," he whispered.

She blinked in response and he reached out to brush the back of his hand down her cheek.

"Everything's fine, I promise."

She blinked again, and Sheppard turned his attention to Mitchell. "Did you tell her what you needed to?" he asked, yawning.

"For now," Mitchell replied.

Sheppard nodded, eyeing him appraisingly. "Maybe you should go grab some rack time then. She won't be able to talk for a while, and it'd be better if she just slept off the rest of the effects."

Mitchell nodded, "Are you coming, too?"

Sheppard shook his head vehemently. "No. And they know better than to try kicking me out."

Mitchell nodded, then shrugged. "Alright then, tell her I'll stop by and see her in the morning?"

"Will do."

He waited for Mitchell to leave before turning back to look down on Logan. "Don't look at me like that, I was nice to the guy!" he chided her.

All she could do was let out a sound that resembled a snort.

"Smartass!" he teased.

He reached out and began stroking her hair. "Go back to sleep, Sparks. You should be over the worst of it by morning." he planted a tender kiss on her brow and kept stroking her hair until her eyelids fluttered closed and her breathing slowed and deepened.

Logan was startled to find Daniel standing there when she answered her door. She thought it would be Sheppard or Mitchell, perhaps even Caldwell.

"Daniel!" she smiled nervously.

"Hi," he grinned. "Mind if I come in for a bit?"

"Uh, no, of course not. Come on in." she gestured to the two chairs nearest the balcony.

"I'm sorry I didn't come by sooner, but there was already quite a crowd waiting to see you in the infirmary."

"Hardly," she chuckled.

"So how are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, a little sore, but I'll be back on duty tomorrow..." she paused to look over at him warily. "You're not going to lecture me again, are you?"

He chuckled and shook his head negatively. "No...I've learned my lesson."

"Good," she smiled at sat down opposite him.

"I'm just glad you're okay."

"Thanks, me too!"

"And...you're still happy here...?"

She nodded. "Very."

"It's nice to see you happy."

She smiled warmly. "What about you?"

He looked at her blankly, "Me? what about me?"

"Are you happy, Daniel? I used to be able to tell, but not so much anymore."

"Yeah, I think so, sure." he said a little too blithely.

What was he supposed to say? That he missed her way too much? That he worried about her constantly? That he hated even the idea of Mitchell, or anyone for that matter, so much as flirting with her? He knew it was over. That she'd moved on. The fact that he'd also moved on did little to assuage the proprietary feeling he had when it came to Logan. It had taken all the self control he could muster not to storm into the infirmary and camp, next to Sheppard, by her side through the night. He knew how childish and selfish that was, but he couldn't help himself. Logan would always own a piece of his heart, no matter what, just like Shau're.

"Are you alright, Daniel?"

"I'm fine," he assured her. "I just..."

"I miss you, too, you know? Just being able to talk to you whenever. It's really odd, going out on these missions and finding all sorts of incredible things...knowing how much you would love to see them...in person, not in a video... Rodney comes close, but no one here can match the...passion... you have for discovery."

He smiled and reached out to take her hand. "I keep hoping that someday Jack will let me stay longer. I realize that's not very realistic of me, but hey! Call me crazy."

"You're not crazy, Daniel. That day may yet come."

"And if it does...Would that bother you at all?"

"No, why?"

"I don't know... I still have this... sense of entitlement...I guess, where you're concerned. Don't get me wrong, I'm not harboring any illusions about the two of us getting back together or anything, but...You know what I mean?"

She smiled and nodded. "Yeah, I think so. I feel the same way. As much as you and I can't be together, it still makes me...cringe... at the thought of you being with another woman. I WANT you to be, I want you to be happy, I want you to have a great relationship with SOMEONE who can understand you and be there for you, the way I never could."

"Logan, you understood me perfectly."

"Yes, but I couldn't be there for you all the time, not the way you needed, or deserved."

"Or vice-versa," he reminded her.

"But we're two of the lucky ones, wouldn't you say?"

"How's that?"

"We're still standing. We're still friends. We still care about each other, and would do anything for the other. How many ex-lovers can say that?"

"I guess, if you put it that way, you're right."

Daniel stayed and talked with her for over an hour. For the first time in a long time, neither of them felt stressed or strained the way they had the last few times they met. At least until her next visitor showed up as Daniel was walking out the door.

"Daniel."

"Cameron..." he looked back at Logan, who shrugged.

"I just stopped by to see how Colonel Devane was feeling today."

"Colonel Devane is feeling better, thank you for asking, Colonel Mitchell," she snarked.

"Good...Uh...very good." He clearly did not want to be standing there, between Logan and Daniel.

"Logan," he leaned down and kissed her on the cheek. "This was fun, thank you. And I'm glad you're okay."

"You, too, Daniel. I'll see you later."

"Cameron," said Daniel, trying not to glare.

"Daniel," Mitchell favored him with a casual smile.

Logan watched Mitchell for a moment, slightly amused at his obvious discomfort. Clearly Sheppard had mentioned her former relationship with Daniel.

"So then, you've come, you've seen, what are you going to do now?" she asked.

Mitchell looked blankly at her. "Beg pardon?"

"Cameron, you don't need anyone's permission to come and visit me. Well, except for MINE, that is."

"That obvious?"

"Even to the blind." she chuckled.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "So...are you up to taking a walk?"

She smiled and nodded. "Sure."

Caldwell watched them go until the rounded a bend in the corridor. He'd promised himself that he wouldn't go anywhere near her, but then here he was. He'd seen the exchange between Logan, Jackson and Mitchell, and felt a stab of pain and jealousy when it became obvious that she and Mitchell were definitely getting "close." He had no right to be jealous. He had no right to keep holding on to feelings he shouldn't even have in the first place. He turned and walked back in the direction he'd come from, promising himself, again, that he'd keep his distance and bury those feelings.

TWO O'CLOCK A.M.

Logan screamed and bolted upright in her bed. Her breathing was labored and her body was perspiring. She looked around the room in a blind panic, then leaped out of bed, grabbed her sidearm and raced down the hall. She opened the door and stepped inside, cautiously looking around for any sign of an intruder. Sheppard instinctively awoke, sensing something amiss and yelped when he saw Logan standing about a foot away from his bed with her zat at the ready.

"Sparky, what the hell?"

"John," she breathed. "Are you okay?"

"Well, except for the near heart attack you just gave me, yeah!"

"Are you sure?"

He didn't like the way she looked. She was...scared. He reached up and pulled her down on the bed beside him. She was trembling and sweating.

"Hey...What's wrong?" he pulled her against his chest and held her there.

"I don't know...I just...I thought you were..." she began to shiver and tears started rolling down her cheeks.

He held her and rocked her for the better part of an hour before she finally began to calm down. "When did you start having nightmares again?" he asked.

She shook her head, "I haven't been...and this was more...It felt like more than...I was so sure that something happened to you, that you were in danger..."

"I'm fine, sweetie, we both are. We're safe and we're together and nothing is ever gonna tear us apart again."

"I'm sorry I scared you," she sniffed as he laid back, tucking her snugly into his arms and covering them both with the blanket.

"I'm sorry you were scared." he murmured.

"I'm okay now," she yawned, closed her eyes and burrowed more closely into Sheppard's arms.

He gently stroked her hair until she fell asleep, concern etched on his face. The fear he'd sensed in her was deep. Primal. It didn't smack of past events, rearing an ugly head in her dreams. It smacked of foreboding. Something to come. He wasn't worried for himself - he was worried for her.


	15. Chapter 15

ATLANTIS GYM A FEW DAYS LATER

Teal'c was smiling one of those trademark half-smiles of his as he watched Logan and Teyla sparring with the "sticks." Because of the techniques he'd taught her over the years, Logan was actually able to keep up with Teyla, when otherwise, Teyla would have wiped the floor with her. As for Teyla, she had been smiling, non-stop, for the past few days. Logan knew why, and the others suspected. Even knowing that the big Jaffa would be leaving that evening, to return to Earth, had done little to dampen her spirit. She knew that General O'Neill had given his permission for Teyla to finally visit Earth, though it would be Elizabeth Weir accompanying her, instead of Sheppard.

There was a huge party scheduled for that evening, a send off for SG-1 and a welcome home for Rodney McKay. Carter would also be joining them and the four SG-1 members would all return to Earth together. Mitchell had confided to her that he was somewhat "tense" about Carter's reaction to the fact that HE had replaced her as the leader on the team, but she assured him that Carter was, first and foremost, a dedicated officer and, that she might actually relish NOT being the one in charge, as it freed her up to concentrate on the more scientific aspects of her duties.

"I could always ask to transfer HERE, if it got too ugly," he ventured smoothly.

"Not going to happen, my friend," she chuckled. "If General O'Neill gets one more SG member trying to wheedle a posting here, there's no telling what he'll do!"

"You're probably right," he agreed. "He DID warn me not to even ASK when I got back to Earth."

A sharp blow to her left thigh brought Logan back to the present. She gasped and winced, then held up her hands in defeat.

"Okay, Teyla...You win...again," she said, out of breath.

"I did not hurt you, did I?" she asked. "You appeared to lose focus for a moment."

"No, I'm fine...And my attention did start to drift a bit, so I got what was coming to me."

"You did very well, Colonel Devane," Teal'c complimented her.

"Indeed," agreed Teyla.

"Thank you. But I think we all know that without Master Teal'c's tutelage, I'd have been toast by now," Logan winced.

They spoke casually for a few more minutes before Teyla and Teal'c excused themselves. Logan remained behind to have at it with the heavy bag for a while. The nightmare she'd had the other night still haunted her. She couldn't seem to let it go. She lost herself in the memory as she tried securing her boxing gloves and was completely caught off guard when Caldwell offered to help. Startled, she instinctively struck at him, which he countered easily. Still frightened, and somewhat lost in the imagery of her nightmare, she continued to strike at him until he managed to immobilize her by locking his arms around her from behind, thereby trapping her arms at her sides. He then sank to the floor, carrying her with him and wrapping his legs around hers.

Whispering words of comfort in her ear, he simply held her while she began to calm and come back to herself. "Shhhhh, Logan, it's alright, it's just me..." he cooed. "Come on, ease down, come back to me..." he begged.

She stiffened slightly as his voice finally registered, then relaxed in his arms and let her head fall back against his chest. "Steve...?"

"That's my girl," he whispered.

"What...Oh my God, Steve, I'm so sorry! What did I do?" she turned her face up toward his, her eyes remorseful.

Caldwell fought hard with himself not to give in to the temptation to lower his head and kiss her. "Where were you just now?" he asked.

She shook her head, "Not really sure...I was just thinking about a dream I had and...I dunno, I didn't hear you come in..."

"Logan, are you still having nightmares?" he asked.

"No...No, nothing like that, really..." she trailed off, suddenly becoming acutely aware of his body entwined around hers.

She pulled away from him and got to her feet, trying to brush aside the slight fluttery feeling he could still generate within her by his proximity. He got to his feet as well and made her look him in the eye.

"Logan, if you're still fighting your demons..."

"No...I...it wasn't even about me...I swear...It was about John..."she sputtered.

He gazed into her eyes and saw that she was telling the truth. She'd never been able to lie to him, about anything, and she wasn't lying now.

"Must have been pretty bad."

"It was...what I remember of it... I'm really sorry, sir, I must have been so lost in thought that I..."

"Reacted as any good soldier would when they're threatened?" he finished for her.

She half-smiled/half-grimaced up at him, and he felt like he'd been punched in the gut. She was so beautiful, and so completely unaware. All he wanted was to take her in his arms, again, to taste her lips and breathe in her intoxicating scent... NO! He couldn't allow himself to think like that again. He was all wrong for her, no matter how much he loved her. He'd married Shannon so he wouldn't be tempted to indulge his own selfish desires over Logan's happiness.

She could sense some kind of inner struggle going on with him, and resisted the urge to question him about it. She knew that if he WANTED to talk about it with her, he would. Then she remembered that he had someone else to talk to about the things that were bothering him.

"Were you taking them off, or putting them on?" he asked.

"Huh?" she blinked up at him.

"The gloves. Were you done here or just getting started?" he asked.

She looked down at the boxing gloves as if just realizing they were there. "Oh...I'm done, sir... I already took my licks with Teyla earlier, so I'm...uh...done."

She tried pulling them off, but had little success. Caldwell stepped forward and began pulling one off, then the other. "Harder than it looks," he murmured.

"Yes...it is. Thank you, sir. I'll let you have the place to yourself..." she smiled and fairly flew out of the gym.

Within moments after her departure, Caldwell was practically beating the stuffing out of the heavy bag.

That evening, McKay and Carter arrived to much whooping, hollering and celebration. After months of working with the Asgard, the two had managed to master the ZPM technology and were eager to teach their respective teams all that they had learned. Carter was surprised to find Daniel, Teal'c and Mitchell on Atlantis, apparently waiting for her. She also took the news of Mitchell replacing her much better than he'd feared. Logan had been right about her.

After a raucous dinner, complete with music, jokes and story-telling, people began either going back to work or simply taking their leave until all that remained in the cafeteria were the team from Earth and Weir, Sheppard, Logan, McKay, and Teyla. Daniel and Mitchell had promised to bring back letters home from anyone who wanted to send them, so there was a crate full of letters sitting near the gate for them to take with them.

Daniel pulled Logan aside to say his goodbyes to her in private. The two had established a new closeness, bound out of friendship and mutual respect, finally managing to ditch any residual romantic overtones between them. He wished her continued happiness in Atlantis and she wished him the same for his life back home.

Mitchell, however, had taken the opportunity to whisk her away, privately, and his goodbye was much more ardent. He knew that any chance for a relationship between them was tenuous, at best, but he wanted to make sure she would not soon forget him. Once he'd gotten her out to a balcony, he wasted no time in claiming a kiss.

He kissed her gently and tentatively at first, then with growing passion. He held her fast against him as his mouth hungrily explored hers. She'd been startled and surprised, at first, but then gave herself over to the moment. She knew it wouldn't and couldn't go anywhere, but it felt good to just let go and enjoy it for what it was. A damned fine kiss.

When it came time to go, they all assembled in the gateroom to see them off. Logan hugged Carter and kissed Teal'c, Daniel and Mitchell goodbye, and stood back to watch the others exchange hugs or handshakes. As the wormhole engaged, Mitchell looked back at her once, smiled wickedly and stepped through the event horizon. His smile had not gone unnoticed by Sheppard, nor had her absence with Mitchell a little earlier. She caught Sheppard's dour expression and scampered back to her quarters before he could corner and interrogate her. Fortunately, McKay cornered Sheppard before he could follow her back to her quarters, which gave her a bit of a reprieve.

0300 THAT NIGHT

Logan watched in horror as the bright light began swirling around Sheppard, faster and faster, until it completely engulfed him.

"NOOOOO!" she screamed, bolting upright in bed.

It was the same nightmare she'd been having for months. It never changed. And each time, she woke up screaming as Sheppard was torn from her life and his own. She sat there for a minute, trying to slow her breathing and calm her shaky nerves, when Sheppard suddenly burst into the room. He'd heard her scream from his own quarters down the hall though, to be honest, he had been waiting for it. This was getting to be a regular occurrence for her.

"Again?" he asked as he crawled into bed beside her and took her in his arms.

She nodded miserably as she clung to him in the darkness. He'd done everything he could to reassure her, as best he could, given the fact that they were all in frequent danger from the Wraith. She'd insisted that the danger didn't emanate from the Wraith, but she couldn't tell WHERE the threat came from in her nightmares.

"Sparky, sweetie...You're gonna have to go see Doc Heightmeyer."

"I'm fine..." she shook her head.

"You're _not_ fine! You're having nightmares all the time, you're not eating right, you're getting distracted and it's gonna get you killed." he chided.

"They'll take me out of the rotation..." she worried.

"Not if you do something _now_ to get to the bottom of this. Sooner or later Caldwell is gonna notice, if he hasn't already, and he's going to take matters into his own hands if you don't do something to help yourself," he warned.

She nodded, dejected. "Alright," she relented.

"Thank you," he whispered and kissed the top of her head.

He settled her comfortably against him, cradling her still shaking form in his arms and held her until she fell asleep. He understood her fear of losing him; it was the same fear he had about losing her and, having already lost her once, he was not anxious to go through that again. Ever.

MONTHS LATER

Logan sat alone at the end of the southwest pier, staring disconsolately out to sea. She'd done her part by going to see Doctor Heightmeyer for counseling sessions, had been doing so for two months when she finally decided that their sessions weren't helping. She'd thanked Heightmeyer and told her what she wanted to hear. She assured the good doctor that she was "better" and able to discontinue their sessions. That had been a month ago. The nightmares still came. Not as frequently as they had been, but they came. She managed to function from day to day, but there was always that underlying fear that *it* would happen, and Sheppard would forever be lost to her.

"Logan?"

She turned to find Shannon Caldwell staring down at her. "Hi," she forced a smile.

"Are you okay?"

"Sure. What can I do for you?" she tried to brush aside the older woman's concern.

Over the past few months Logan had come to grudgingly respect, even to _like_ the woman, much to her surprise. She was very kind and caring, something Logan felt was extremely rare in a talented, driven scientist. She seemed to have the unique ability to care as much about the people around her as she cared about science. Aside from Rodney, Sam and Zelenka, it was a trait she didn't see in many of the scientists she had known over the years. Not that they were bad people, just extremely focused on their work to the detriment of families, friends or even some of their co-workers. It was easy to see why Caldwell had felt comfortable enough with her to pledge to spend the rest of his life with her.

"I don't mean to pry, but you don't seem to be okay. I won't push, but if it'll make you feel better, I'm a good listener," she smiled warmly at her.

This time Logan did smile for real. "I know you are. Thank you."

"Would you feel comfortable telling me about what's troubling you?"

Logan shrugged and looked out to sea again. "A nightmare I've had...Actually, a recurring nightmare."

"Is it about the time you were held captive and presumed dead?"

Logan shook her head negatively, "No, not at all. I haven't had nightmares about that in ages..."

"So...someone close to you?"

She nodded miserably. "Very."

"That would have to be Colonel Sheppard, then."

Logan nodded again. "I suppose Colonel Caldwell has filled you in on things around here by now."

"Some. But the devotion between yourself and Colonel Sheppard is pretty common knowledge. I understand you've been friends for quite some time?"

"We go all the way back to the cradle," she smiled. "Literally."

"That's very rare."

"Yes, it is. John Sheppard is the only...family, I guess you could say, that I have left. The mere thought of losing him...I..." she trailed off to avoid breaking down into tears.

"It must terrify you to no end."

"It does," she admitted freely.

"And what happens to him in this nightmare of yours?" Shannon prodded gently.

"He...I'm not sure how or why, but he's..."

That was it. The floodgates opened and Logan dissolved into uncontrollable sobs. Shannon quickly wrapped her arms around the younger woman and rocked her gently through her sobs, whispering words of encouragement. When Logan began to calm, and regain control of herself, Shannon continued to hold her. She found herself sharing details of the dream she hadn't felt safe discussing with Heightmeyer. She explained that she couldn't remember exactly how Sheppard came to be in the danger that took him from her, but likened the final moments, before she woke up screaming, to what had happened to Daniel when he'd ascended.

"So, in your dream, Colonel Sheppard didn't die but ascended?"

The fear and pain in Logan's eyes was so intense that Shannon could feel it just by looking at her.

"Death or ascension...Either way, he would be gone..." she choked.

"Logan, do you believe that this is simply a manifestation of your fear, or do you think it could be something else?"

She shrugged. "What do you mean?"

"You seem to be operating under the assumption that this nightmare is a product of your fear and imagination. What if it's not?"

Logan looked at her blankly for a moment. "I'm not sure what you're suggesting, but if it's what I think..."

"What I'm suggesting is that maybe, just maybe, given the connection that you and Colonel Sheppard seem to share, perhaps this is a warning, an omen."

"I can't say that I like that theory, since it virtually guarantees the outcome I've been dreading."

"Don't be so sure. It may very well be your own fear that is skewing your perceptions of the dream toward what it is you're most afraid of. Depending on your own beliefs about time and relativity... Logan, do you believe that the future is already set? That there is nothing we can do to affect a change one way or the other and that our paths are predetermined?"

Logan stared at her in wonder. "No...I believe there are an infinite number of possibilities and that our actions, whether good or bad, greatly affect the future we have."

"Good, so if you're not willing to accept this particular fate for Colonel Sheppard, perhaps you can do something to change it."

"Provided this is what you suggest...But...I don't know HOW it happens, or when, or why. I know it has nothing to do with the Wraith, but beyond that..." she shrugged.

"Focus on what you _do_ know, Logan. Look for the details that can give you clues. A sound, a scent...anything, and work from there. From all that I've seen for myself, or have been told, you are not a woman who gives in to her fear, you are not a woman who gives up in a fight. You are an amazing and powerful person. Whether this is simply a dream borne out of fear or a warning against something that is coming, I truly believe you can fight it."

Logan gazed into the eyes of the older woman and knew that she had just given her a remarkable gift. Not only of friendship, but of hope. She felt a huge weight lift off her shoulders and for the first time in months, she felt...better. Shannon was right. Logan had never been one to simply sit back and accept the inevitable without a fight. She embraced the older woman and thanked her graciously for her kindness and support. She knew, without question, that Shannon Caldwell had won her trust and her friendship for life. She would never again question Steven Caldwell's choice in marrying her.

Days turned into weeks and weeks into months until another six months passed relatively uneventfully, with the exception of a myriad of different skirmishes with the Wraith. The Genii had been surprisingly, if not suspiciously quiet. Teyla had gone, the previous month, on her tour of Earth with Weir. She'd been amazed at the sheer number of people who lived on Earth and how they took their own lives and safety for granted everyday, not living in the shadow of the Wraith. She eagerly shared photographs and her impressions of their homeworld, when she first returned, but she had suddenly become withdrawn and somewhat distant over the past two weeks.

Logan suspected it had something to do with a certain Jaffa she knew and loved. From a romantic standpoint, it was a truly miserable situation. Both Teal'c and Teyla were dedicated warriors, who would always put their people's needs above their own. The fact that they were from different worlds, let alone different galaxies, only complicated matters more.

Suddenly, a very excited McKay bolted through a doorway just in front of her, almost knocking her over in his exuberance. He caught her and then spun her around in the air, laughing all the while.

"Rodney! If I didn't know better, I'd say you had too much to drink!" she laughed.

"Oh, no, no, no, my good Colonel...this is better than alcohol!"

A wicked grin spread across her face. "Rodney...Did you meet a woman?" she teased.

McKay stopped in his tracks, looking confused. "What? No... You remember that probe we sent to R5X-661?"

"I do,"

"You will never believe what we found."

"I might, if you tell me," she winked at him.

"Oh, right, yes...We were right about there being no life signs there, but...we did find signs of an abandoned civilization."

"Are we talking ruins?" Logan prodded.

"Nope! Everything, every building is structurally intact, but the best part is..."

"Yes?"

"Take a look at this," he handed her a few still-shots from the video feed.

Logan gasped as she recognized the architecture and symbols. "This is..."

"Ancient!" he chirped happily.

"Another city of the Ancients?" she was smiling as much as he now.

"I'm on my way to see Weir and Caldwell now, join me?"

"Right beside you...Have you told Colonel Sheppard?" she asked.

"Not yet, but I think he's with them."

The two of them hurried toward the control tower, where Weir's office was located.

There were smiles all the way around as McKay showed them the photos and vide they'd retrieved from the probe.

"I suppose it makes sense that the Ancients would have built other cities, but we've found no reference or even a clue that there were any others in existence." Weir said.

"Until now. When can we leave?" asked McKay.

"We do know that when the Ancients were in the process of evacuating from Pegasus, the last group to leave had been waiting for several transport ships to arrive before abandoning the city...There could be, who knows how many more cities like this out there." Caldwell stated.

"Yes. When can we leave?" McKay asked again.

"That's true. We've barely begun to explore the vast database of gate addresses in the Ancient database." Weir said.

"Yes. When can we leave?" McKay was practically jumping up and down like a child.

"We'll need more than one team to explore," Sheppard pointed out.

"Yes, yes, when can we leave?"

"At least four," Caldwell agreed.

"I think we should notify General O'Neill, maybe have a team from Earth join us on this?" Weir said.

"How long will that take?" McKay asked petulantly.

"Agreed," said Caldwell.

"Colonel Sheppard and I will pull together the teams we'll be taking from here," Logan said.

"Excuse me? Am I invisible here?" an exasperated McKay asked.

"Rodney, would you please stop lagging behind? You're slowing us down, I thought you'd be the one most anxious to get there!" Sheppard teased, fully aware that they'd all been ignoring him.

Logan stifled a chuckle when she saw the look on McKay's face.

SIX HOURS LATER

Four Lantean teams were standing by in the control room, waiting for the team from Earth to arrive. It was no great surprise to anyone to see SG-1 step through the event horizon. Teal'c was stoic, as usual, Mitchell was smiling but controlled. Daniel and Sam, however, looked like a couple of kids at Christmas time.

They took the time to exchange pleasantries and receive final instructions before embarking on their mission to the newly discovered Ancient city.


	16. Chapter 16

It felt like deja-vu all over again for Sheppard and McKay as they stepped through the event horizon and into a room very much like the one they'd found when they first arrived in Atlantis. Everything was cold and dark, until Sheppard ventured close to the control panel at the top of the stairs. One by one, the Ancient systems responded to his presence and sprang to life as he drew near. Logan glanced over at Daniel and saw that his expression was exactly as she'd expected: Awe-stricken. This was what he lived for.

"Still no life signs?" Sheppard asked.

"No, none...Just like when we got to Atlantis." McKay replied.

The five teams split up and began exploring the city which, while not nearly as large as Atlantis, was still quite sizeable. It took them six hours to cover just one section from gateroom to the southernmost corner of the city. Unlike Atlantis, this city was firmly planted upon land. But, like Atlantis, it seemed to be fully self-contained. McKay speculated that it might have something to do with shielding it against attack. That or it could be yet another "flying city." That idea, in particular, intrigued Carter and McKay immensely.

"This city runs on three ZPM's like Atlantis," explained McKay. "Two are depleted, but the last one looks like it's almost fully charged."

"Maybe because this city's shield hasn't been holding back an ocean for 10,000 years?" Carter offered.

"Probably. We can bring in a couple of ZPM's and fully charge the city, and then...we can see what she really has to offer!" McKay was practically salivating.

It took several days, and a few back and forth trips between Atlantis and the new city, but they managed to search and secure three entire sections. They had replaced the two depleted ZPM's and activate the city's shield. Weir and Caldwell had each, alternately, come and inspected the city and their progress. What they'd found was everything they could have hoped for. A second, fully functional Ancient City. The jumper bay was full of operational jumpers, to the delight of Sheppard and Mitchell and the armory was loaded with drones.

Daniel, Carter and McKay could rarely be torn away from the database, even to eat, though Daniel could easily be lured away with the promise of one artifact or another.

Sheppard had taken Carter, Teyla and Lorne on a reconnaissance around the planet in one of the jumpers, but they had detected no life signs, other than their own team members. The planet was indeed devoid of habitation. With the shields protecting the gate and the city, there was little for people like Logan, who was growing increasingly bored, to do. She had taken to wandering the halls, admiring the craftsmanship of the Ancient artisans, but it was really just much the same as Atlantis.

Caldwell had promised that they could go out and explore the land surrounding the city, so she at least had one thing to look forward to. In the meantime, she decided to take one of the jumpers out for a spin to alleviate some of her boredom. She went looking for Sheppard, but bumped into Mitchell instead.

"Whatcha doin?" he asked.

"Going for a ride before I LOSE MY MIND!" she made a face at him.

"Want some company?"

"Sure, who'd you have in mind?" she teased.

"Me?" it was half-question/half-plea.

She stopped and appeared to be mulling her options. "Well...I suppose..." she teased.

"Great!" he grinned and fell into step beside her. "You know, you really don't have to make me work so hard."

She looked over at him curiously. "Work so hard for what?"

"To get some quality alone time with you."

"What?"

"All you have to do is crook that little finger at me and you know I'll come running," he smiled wickedly.

She stopped in mid-stride and gaped at him. "What?"

"I'm just saying...you know...In case you couldn't tell the last time we were together...I'm uh, rather fond of you."

"Fond...?"

"Okay," he moved closer and looked her in the eye. "More than fond."

"Maybe I SHOULDN'T let you come with me..." she eyed him in mock wariness.

He placed a hand over his heart in supposed pain. "You're killing me here."

"You are so full of it, Mitchell!" she shook her head and continued walking toward the jumper bay. "And if all you're gonna do is flirt with me, you can forget that ride!"

Neither of them noticed Caldwell standing in an open doorway down a hallway they passed as they walked. He did nothing to alert them to his presence and simply let them continue on their way. Both Logan and Mitchell were technically off-duty and they weren't doing anything wrong. He'd known for a while that Mitchell had a thing for her, but it was certainly none of his business, until and unless it started affecting their work. He'd come a long way toward getting over the feelings he had for her, but he wasn't quite fully there yet. Shannon had been wonderful, not only as a distraction but as a genuine friend.

"Steve?"

He turned to find Shannon standing behind him in the doorway. Her eyes were full of compassion and understanding, and...something else.

"Is it still so hard when you see her?" she asked, genuinely concerned.

"No," he shrugged. "Not really."

"You and I have gotten pretty close over this last year. Haven't we?"

"Yes, we have." he nodded. His smile was warm and affectionate.

"I wonder, did Samuel ever tell you..." she trailed off uncertainly.

"Tell me what?" he prodded.

"When we first met, all those years ago...It was you I was attracted to."

He looked at her in surprise. "No...Me?" he chuckled.

"You. But you were so focused on the future, joining the military and seeing the world... No time for silly young girls like myself."

"I'm...sorry...I never meant to..." he stammered nervously.

"Steve, I'm not berating you. It's just something I thought you should know. You went away, I got to know your brother and eventually fell for him. We were happy."

"I always thought so..." he murmured.

"We were. The things I saw in Sam, though, were the very same things that drew me to you first."

"Shannon, why are you telling me this now?" he asked, looking into her eyes.

"I think we've gotten close enough that we can be completely honest with one another, haven't we?"

"Absolutely."

"I wanted you to know, because my feelings for you have...changed."

"Changed?"

"Grown."

"Grown?"

He really wasn't getting it, so she decided to act on the impulse she'd been fighting for weeks. She moved over to him, took his face in her hands and kissed him. Hard. She felt him begin to respond, then stiffen and pull back.

"Shannon..."

"I just thought you should know," she whispered, then turned on her heel and walked down the hall, leaving him gaping at her retreating back in stunned silence.

ATLANTIS CONFERENCE ROOM

O'Neill looked around at the faces surrounding him around the conference table.

"Bottom line it for me, people."

"The Atlantis gate is still the only one that can open a wormhole back to Earth, the Ancients were very thorough about that," McKay began.

"That said, the city itself can and should be used to further exploration of the Pegasus Galaxy," Sheppard chimed in. Anyone operating from that city can always use our gate for travel between here and Earth, so it's really a non-issue."

"What is at issue," Weir pointed out, "Is who will MAN that city."

Caldwell sat forward, "I think a combined military and scientific team, such as ours, would be the logical way to go. Using it as strictly a military base would be a waste of all the technology there."

"Are you proposing to divide the people stationed in Atlantis between here and the new city?" asked Weir.

"No. Certainly some of our people here should go, at least initially, since they are most familiar with the Ancient technology, but I see no reason we can't bring in more people from Earth, both military and scientific."

"That does seem to be the general consensus back home," O'Neill admitted. "What are the odds that there are MORE cities still out there?"

"Excellent," chimed in Carter and McKay.

"It stands to reason that there would be, sir," Logan shrugged.

"Whether or not they're still standing is entirely another matter," McKay added.

"I may know a way we can find out," offered Sheppard.

Before he could say a word, Logan knew exactly what he was going to suggest, and for some reason, it filled her with dread. Even a little anger.

"How?" asked O'Neill.

"I can go and ask someone who might know."

"Are you talking about..."

"Athar..." Logan cut Weir off.

"Who?" O'Neill looked somewhat confused.

"Colonel Sheppard's ancient girlfriend," McKay snarked.

Daniel sat forward, "Excuse me?"

"The ascended being that Colonel Sheppard and his team encountered on a mission to Proculus."

"Ah...The mission report didn't mention anything about a close...friendship with her," he chided.

"I thought she wasn't allowed to help us, or any human beyond those of her own world." Weir looked over at Sheppard, who was trying to maintain his cool demeanor.

"She's not. It's not that she doesn't WANT to help, she does, but she says the 'others' would stop her, and then she wouldn't even be able to protect her own people."

"Yeah well, that does sound like 'them." Daniel added. "I mean they did the same thing to Oma Desala when she got involved in human matters," he shrugged.

The name, Oma Desala, made Logan stiffen. A part of her still blamed her for allowing the Goa'uld to reign in terror over their home galaxy for so long. For helping to create Anubis, even for Daniel's choosing to ascend rather than to be healed... Old wounds, that apparently hadn't quite healed. The fact that Oma had FINALLY chosen to act against Anubis, punishment be damned, had done little to redeem her in Logan's eyes. She knew that it was pointless to hold her responsible when there were so many of these 'others' who were also doing nothing but sitting back and watching...

Sheppards eyes sought hers out while she sat there quietly seething, but she would not meet his gaze. He knew how she felt about Oma Desala AND Athar, by extension. He had never been able to convince her that Athar had no choice in the matter. A view, she reminded him, that he wouldn't normally adopt, were he not thinking with a certain part of his anatomy. The two of them had never come to an understanding about the matter, but as true friends, they'd agreed to disagree.

"So what makes you think she'll tell us anything now?" O'Neill asked.

"I don't know that she can, or will, but it doesn't hurt to ask. If she tells us, we're that much closer, if not, we're no worse off and we'll eventually find some mention of other cities within the city's database."

"I agree," Daniel spoke up. "We have to at least try."

"You just want to go with him to meet her," O'Neill accused.

"Yeah, well...so?" he stammered.

Logan kept her opinions to herself as both O'Neill and Caldwell looked at her questioningly. O'Neill knew exactly what she was thinking, because he shared the same feelings as she on the matter. Caldwell had a pretty good idea how she felt about it, given what had happened to Daniel Jackson. Neither of them pushed her.

"Okay, well, like you said, it certainly doesn't make us any worse off, so go ahead. Try talking to her and see where you get. In the meantime, I'll be meeting with General Hammond and all the other mucky-mucks back on Earth," O'Neill told them.

They all stood as O'Neill rose to his feet and excused himself. Before he left, he pulled Logan aside and whispered in her ear.

"I feel the same way," then winked and headed for the control room.

It was decided that Sheppard, Daniel, Teyla and Carter would go to meet with Athar. McKay had been forbidden, given his abject hostility from their prior meeting. Sheppard also wanted Logan to accompany him, for more personal reasons. He wanted Logan to meet Athar, and see for herself that she wasn't evil incarnate. But, to her relief, Caldwell nixed the suggestion.

She watched, with the others as the jumper lowered into the gateroom and waited for the wormhole to Proculus to open. She smiled half-heartedly and waved at Sheppard before he accelerated through the event horizon, all the while assuring McKay that he was not alone in his feelings regarding Athar.

Sheppard remained unusually quiet when they arrived on Proculus, and one look from Teyla told the others to hold any questions they might have. Daniel, of course, was thoroughly fascinated by the local culture and would have happily spent all his time there studying the people and their way of life were it not for the fact that they were there to see one of the Ancients. Having had her own experience with Orin a while back, Sam was acutely aware of the fine line Sheppard was treading with Athar, even if _he_ wasn't. In fact, of the three of them, Teyla was really the only one who hadn't really dealt closely with the Ascended ones before, followed by Sheppard, who'd only dealt with Athar the one time.

Within twenty minutes of their arrival, Athar appeared in the temple, still in the guise of the Priestess Chaya Sar. She greeted the team effusively, particularly Sheppard, whom she could not seem to tear her eyes away from. She registered a slight flicker of recognition when Sheppard introduced her to Daniel, but said nothing. After exchanging pleasantries, she asked if they would mind excusing her for a private conversation with Sheppard. They agreed, though Daniel a little reluctantly, and went to walk around the village while Sheppard pleaded their case with her.

"I do not believe it is the location of Ancient cities that Athar wishes to speak of with Colonel Sheppard." Teyla informed them.

"No?" Carter looked at her.

"Athar has always appeared to be greatly enamored of the Colonel. I believe that to be the only reason she agreed to accompany our team back to Atlantis."

"You don't think she might have been a little curious about the people inhabiting an Ancient city?" Daniel asked.

"If she is truly a higher being, would she not already KNOW all about the people of your world, or mine for that matter?" Teyla countered.

"Do you not trust her, Teyla?" Carter asked.

"I do not know her well, Colonel Carter. She appears to care deeply for her people, and has already demonstrated her protectiveness over this planet. I believe her feelings for the Colonel are genuine, as well. Beyond that, I cannot say one way or the other."

"Very diplomatic, Teyla." Daniel smiled.

About an hour later Sheppard finally emerged from the temple, wearing a lopsided grin and the back of his shirttail hanging out. Daniel hastened to him first, warning the disheveled Sheppard quietly about his state before Teyla and Carter saw him. Sheppard sheepishly pulled himself together, thanked Daniel and led them all back to the temple, where they could speak with Athar privately. Athar seemed to be contrite and apologetic, but adamantly refused to help them discover the location of any other Ancient cities that might be located in the Pegasus galaxy. At one point, Sheppard thought Daniel had actually gotten through to her, but she remained unmoved.

"Can you at least tell us if there ARE other cities, even if you can't tell us where?" he asked.

Athar looked at Sheppard, who smiled encouragingly. "You, of all people know I cannot help you." she said.

"So you DO know who I am?" he asked it as more of a statement than a question.

"I do," she admitted.

"Then you know I am not one of them."

"Yes. Just as you know that I can do nothing without putting my people at great risk!"

"Athar, no one is judging you..." Sheppard began.

"I know you are not, and I have already told you that I would help you if I could, but I cannot..."

"Or WILL not!" an accusatory voice behind them said.

The four of them turned in shock to see Logan, Bates and Teal'c standing in the doorway. Sheppard took up a protective stance in front of Athar, who was peering curiously at Logan, and only Logan.

"Colonel Devane, gentlemen, what brings you out here?" he asked, clearly taken aback.

"Doctor Weir was...concerned..." Logan replied icily.

Daniel knew that look. He'd known she would react badly to any mention of Ascended beings, particularly one who might remind her of Oma Desala. He'd rarely seen Logan behave so overtly hostile, especially to someone she'd never met before. She'd always been much more diplomatic in her approach.

"Gentlemen, ladies, would you please excuse Colonel Devane and I for a few moments?" Sheppard asked evenly.

No one wanted to get in the middle of what was sure to be a very unpleasant discussion, so they all nodded and filed out the door without question. Only Daniel looked back.

"Athar," he turned toward her and took her by the arm to propel her forward a few steps with him. "I believe I told you about my FRIEND, my most trusted friend..."

"Logan Devane..." she finished for him.

Logan's eyes flashed angrily, but she maintained her composure.

"Logan, this is Athar." he shot her a glance, warning her to be nice.

"Your eminence," Logan snarkily favored her with a curtsy.

Sheppard shot her another warning glance. "Athar was gracious enough to sit down and discuss our request for information."

"How very... nice." she snarked.

"Logan,"

"No really, John, it's not every day that a *higher* being deigns to even favor one of us lower life forms with an audience, we should be forever grateful..."

"Logan, stop!" he demanded. What had gotten into her?!

"It is alright, John," Athar told him.

"You see that, John? She is so gracious that's she's even gonna let a lower stand here and snark at her as if she were no better than we are!"

"Logan! What the hell's wrong with you?!" he took her by the arms and moved her away from Athar.

"I do not blame her for mistrusting me," Athar said.

That only further fueled Logan's anger. "After all, I'm only a human, barely worth a moment's thought, IF that!"

Sheppard grabbed her firmly and gave her a gentle shake. "Stop it," he whispered.

"I know where her anger comes from."

"You know nothing about me, _madame_!" Logan snapped, her eyes flashing with anger.

"I know _everything_ about you," Athar corrected her, a satisfied smirk barely registering on her face. "Everything that John knows."

Sheppard wanted to disappear through the ground under his feet.

"Is that so?" Logan turned accusing eyes on Sheppard.

"It's not... what you think..." he stammered, cringing at the familiar fire in her eyes. He was in for it now.

"Do you even KNOW what I'm thinking?" she hissed.

"Yeah...I'm...pretty sure..." he mumbled.

"John and I harbor no secrets from one another," Athar informed her, much to Sheppard's chagrin.

"Please, Athar...don't help..." he begged.

"Oh my God, you _didn't_!" she pulled out of his grip.

"What?!" he asked.

"You did! You let her do that 'sharing' thing on you, didn't you?" she gasped in horror.

Sheppard stood there like a deer caught in the headlights. "Is that so... _bad_?" he asked, knowing full well that it was.

"You know, there was a time, not so long ago, that you agreed with me about how the Ascended just threw the human race to the wolves..."

"That's different," he croaked.

" _John_!" she gasped in horror. "What she's doing is no different than what I told you about Oma and all the others who left us to the tender mercies of Anubis and the other Goa'ulds!"

"You do not understand," Athar moved to stand in front of her. "You are letting your petty, childish insecurities cloud your mind..."

"Hey! Don't talk to her like that." Sheppard swiftly came to Logan's defense.

"It _is_ the truth, John. She is very possessive of you..."

"As I am of _her_. Now let's stop this bickering and get back to the matter at hand, shall we?" he asked.

Logan put her hands up in defeat and walked over to stand by the doorway.

"I have to admit, she makes a good point," Sheppard sighed.

"You know why I can't help you." she placed a hand on his face and caressed his cheek softly.

"Simply telling us whether or not there are other Ancient cities left standing in this galaxy, aside from the one we just found, is not going to violate any Ancient Prime Directive. How do you think we found Atlantis in the first place? The Ancients left the clues for us to find. They wanted it to be discovered."

Athar glanced over at Logan, a look of hostility in her eyes, then looked up at Sheppard.

"You would have me tell you?"

"Please."

"Very well. Yes, there are other cities, some are left standing, others are not. I cannot tell you where to find them."

Sheppard smiled and hugged her. "Thank you," he whispered.

"There is much I would risk for you, John," she turned and gave Logan one more withering glance and then walked away.

Logan left the temple, afraid she might say something horrible; something she might regret. Everyone else was waiting outside, except for Daniel, who had been talking to some of the locals. Daniel waited until Sheppard left the temple before going inside to find Athar. She was waiting for him at the top of the stairs.

"I knew you would come." she said.

"I had to." he replied.

"I gave John Sheppard what information I could."

"Thank you," he smiled. "That helps."

"I did not know you, from before," she answered his unspoken question.

"No, not personally, but you knew me as one of the others, just as I would have been able to sense that you were who you are, even if I hadn't been told."

"This is true," she smiled. "Tell me, Daniel Jackson, why did you choose to give up your powers and take human form again?"

"I got tired of being told I couldn't intervene in human matters. I ascended, to begin with, so that I could have the power to affect change, to do more to help the people of my galaxy because I felt so... limited in my ability to do enough as a human being. Then I learned that I actually had more power to help them by being one of them. Being ascended limited me in more ways than being human."

"I see."

"You must. The Oma that Logan mentioned, she is the one who helped me to ascend. She received a punishment very much like your own."

"This one called 'Oma' is known to me," she admitted.

"She felt trapped, much like you do right now. Helpless to affect the kind of change she wanted to. Having to stand by and watch millions of people die or be enslaved as hosts to the Goa'uld. Until she finally decided to do something about it."

"And now, there is nothing she can do to help the human race."

"Actually, that's not true...Because of her actions, my people were able to finally defeat the Goa'uld, to free countless worlds from the oppression of those who had oppressed them for so long. Even now, she continues to fight the one who came so close to destroying all life on every planet in my galaxy once and for all. As long as she is locked in combat with him, my people are safe."

"From him."

"Yes. We know there will always be dangers out there, powerful enemies...But we have a chance now."

"And you would have me do the same?" she asked.

Daniel smiled and shrugged. "That's not for me to say," he admitted.

"Neither is it for Logan Devane to say." she snapped, a look of bitterness came over her face..

"Maybe not. But if you know as much about her as you claim, then you have to know that she is acting in the best interests of her people, just as you are. She witnessed countless atrocities committed over the years by the Goa'uld, knowing that the Ascended had the power to stop it, and didn't. That's not an easy thing to accept."

"Evidently."

"A word of advice?" Daniel arched an eyebrow at her.

"Yes?"

"Don't ask Sheppard to make a choice between the two of you. He will not thank you for it. And you won't like the outcome."


	17. Chapter 17

As Daniel exited the temple, Carter caught up with him. "There you are, we've been looking everywhere for you."

"Sorry, I just...uh, wanted to have a word with Athar."

"Did you get anywhere with her?" she asked.

Daniel shrugged, "I don't know, I doubt it."

"I get the impression that Logan isn't too fond of her," she chuckled.

"That obvious, eh?"

"It's because of what happened with you, isn't it?"

"That's part of it. Can you honestly say you don't feel a certain resentment towards them for standing idly by while the Goa'uld ran amok in the galaxy?" he asked.

"Oh no...I have a lot of resentment." she admitted.

"There you go."

Sheppard caught up with Logan by the jumpers. "Logan," he started breathlessly.

"Not now, John." she warned.

"Hey, I thought we promised not to do this."

"This?"

"The silent treatment, the avoidance... The walking away?" he reminded her.

"So we did," she turned to face him, her eyes ablaze with anger.

"Look, she did tell us that there were more Ancient cities out there, she didn't have to do that," he pointed out. Which was probably not the best course of action to take at that moment.

"I'm sorry, am I not properly _appreciative_?" she sneered.

"Why are you so angry at me?" he asked.

"You KNOW why, John. The hypocrisy aside, you shared things with her...PRIVATE things...things that were once and always supposed to be just between YOU and ME!" a single tear slid down her cheek and she brushed it angrily away.

"I didn't know that was the way that 'sharing' thing worked. It's not like I opened my mouth and told her all your deep dark secrets!" he said defensively. "And..."

"You might as well have, John, because the effect is the same," she cut him off. "She knows _everything_ about me that you know. Everything, from the cradle on..."

"I'm sorry, Logan, I never meant to..."

"What did you think she meant when she said the two of you would know each other as completely as you could?!" she cried.

"Well...Not anything like _that_... And... I was about to say - she doesn't know everything."

"You...Never mind," she started to walk up the ramp leading into the jumper.

"No! Don't do that... Nobody walks away, remember?"

"Look, John, I know that you would never purposely betray my trust, I know you would never intentionally hurt me."

"Never," he agreed. "Now please let me finish?"

She nodded.

"I was about to say, she doesn't know half as much as she thinks she does."

"You were a wide open book to her, John!"

"Once I realized what was happening, I managed to sort of... shut off the flow on my end," he told her.

"How's that?" she sniffled.

"I don't understand the way it all works, but yeah... I could feel this sort of wall go up and it kept her out. She has no idea how much she really knows, because she has no idea how much there is - and not just about you."

"It hurts, John" she admitted. "It really hurts."

"I'm sorry, Sparks...I didn't understand, or I never would have gone along with it."

"Yeah, I know...And I'll get over it. What bothers me beyond the personal stuff? Is the fact that you can't see her in the cold light of reality."

"What does _that_ mean?" he blinked at her.

I meant what I said before... if it were anyone else, you'd be as furious as I am. But you're thinking with your... nether regions, instead of your brain. Honestly John?!"

"What?" he squawked.

She took a step toward him and looked him in the eye. "Your fly is half-open, Captain Kirk, and I can smell her all over you."

At that moment the others began arriving back at the jumpers one by one, cutting off any further conversation.

ONE HOUR LATER

They'd arrived back in Atlantis in time for a video conference with General O'Neill, General Hammond, General Landry and President Hayes. Logan, Daniel, Sheppard and Mitchell were summoned to the conference room to participate immediately upon their arrival.

"I'm sorry...Say that again?" Daniel asked in amazement.

"You're all being reassigned...to Pegasus." Hammond repeated.

"Specifically to the new city on Genoa," O'Neill clarified.

"You're kidding," Daniel murmured.

"Genoa?" Mitchell asked.

"We were able to determine the name from the Ancient database," Weir informed them.

"Joining SG-1 will be several teams of both military and scientific researchers, much the same as the Atlantis expedition." Hayes announced.

"That's fantastic," exclaimed Mitchell.

"It gets better," O'Neill grinned.

"How's that?"

"Since there are now two cities to oversee, we're sending in another administrator. Dr. Weir will continue to oversee the civilian aspects, of both cities, and Colonel Caldwell will be the lead military officer, but we're also sending in a General who will be the ultimate authority in the Pegasus galaxy with regards to both military and civilian personnel..." Hayes trailed off and let that piece of information register for a moment.

Both Logan and Sheppard tensed for the announcement.

"General Hammond AND General O'Neill will be sharing that duty, each with a six month rotation."

Smiles lit up faces all the way around the conference table.

"Seriously?" Daniel asked.

"Seriously," Hayes assured them. "It'll take some time to work out the logistics and get teams together, but it's already in the works. Now, should you find any more abandoned Ancient cities out there..."

"We've been informed that there ARE some still left standing." Sheppard piped up.

"Have you now?" Weir looked at him, clearly surprised.

"We don't know WHERE, or even how many, just that there _are_ some," he clarified.

"Interesting. Still, our first priority is to get Genoa up and running with a full staff before we go looking for any more."

"Understood, Mr. President," Caldwell said.

As Logan walked through the control room after the meeting, a frantic Kitah and her friend Lyta came running up to her.

"Colonel, have you seen Torus?" asked Lyta.

"No, Lyta, not since before we last went through the gate. Why?"

"He has been missing for many hours. We have been unable to find him anywhere, either here or the mainland." Lyta was on the verge of becoming hysterical.

"Okay, try to stay calm. Where did you see him last?"

"He was here, to play the game you call basketball."

"Alright, I remember seeing him in the gym...He wanted to know where Colonel Sheppard was and I told him that he'd gone on a mission..."

"Where is Colonel Sheppard?" Kitah asked.

"He left again...Lyta, you don't think..." she trailed off as the possibility dawned on her.

"What?"

"He's snuck aboard the puddle jumpers before, wanting to be near Colonel Sheppard...And Colonel Sheppard was on his way to see..."

"Who?"

"Athar..." Logan shook her head. She'd heard that the boy had been almost as enamored of her as Sheppard was.

"It would be too tempting for him to resist!"

"But you have all returned, and there is no sign of him!" Lyta cried.

"He would be safe on Proculus, so don't worry. I'll go myself and bring him back."

"May I accompany you?" Lyta asked.

"I'm afraid not, Lyta. I won't be gone long, remain here with Teyla. I will bring him home, I promise."

Logan went directly to Caldwell and explained the situation. He authorized a quick round trip to pick up the boy and bring him home. Taking Lorne and Bates with her, she headed for the jumper bay. When they arrived on Proculus, the three of them split up and began searching through the village. Logan had expected him to be in the temple, trying to gain an audience with Athar, but he was not there. As she turned to leave, she was startled to find Athar standing in the doorway.

"I did not expect to see you again so soon."

"Trust me, it wasn't my first choice."

"What are you doing here?"

"A young boy hid on one of the puddle jumpers to hitch a ride here. We think he was coming to see you."

"Is it young Torus you speak of?"

"Yes...Have you seen him?"

"I have not."

"Then how did you know..."

"He seemed to be very fond of me when I visited Atlantis."

"Right...I don't suppose there's any way you can tell me where he is now? You know, with your super sense and all?"

"He is not within the village."

"That much I've already figured out. Maybe if you point and wink?"

"He is in a clearing just north of the village,"

"Thank you," she tried desperately to be gracious.

"Logan, why did John not return for the boy?"

"He's busy right now."

Logan excused herself and radioed Lorne and Bates to head north, theorizing that the boy was trying to find where they had previously parked the jumpers on their last visit. Logan was just about to exit the tree line surrounding the clearing when she got a very bad feeling. Dropping to one knee, she pulled out her binoculars and looked around the clearing. Nothing moved, but the bad feeling she had was quickly turning to dread. She was about to key her mic when she saw the boy crawling on the ground toward her. His eyes were wild with fear, and never moved from her face. Gathering him into her arms, she held him closely and tried to reassure him.

"What's wrong, Torus?" she whispered.

"Wraith," he whispered back.

Here? The great Athar was supposed to prevent that, she thought.

"Where?" she whispered to the frightened boy.

Torus pointed toward a thick growth of brush across the clearing from where they were hiding. Though unable to see anything, she knew by the sick feeling in her gut that it was there. Before she could formulate a plan, the Wraith burst from his hiding place and began striding directly toward their hiding place. She motioned for Torus to climb onto her back and hold on, then began firing her P-90 at the Wraith. She hit him about five times but it did little to slow him down.

Logan jumped up, with Torus riding on her back, and began to retreat back toward the village. She had only gone about ten yards before she ran smack into some kind of shield that stopped her in her tracks. Frantically, she keyed her mic and called out to Lorne and Bates, warning them about the Wraith and giving her approximate location.

"You cannot escape, human." The Wraith called out.

"I had a feeling you'd say that," she muttered to herself.

She began to run parallel to the shield, just trying to put some distance between them and the Wraith. She wondered, again, where the all-mighty Athar was and how she had let even a single Wraith land on her planet. Before long, she ran into the second 'wall' of the shield, preventing her from running any further in that direction.

"Like a rat in a maze," she muttered as she again changed direction.

She was running out of room to run, she knew that. But she wasn't about to give up and let the Wraith have the boy, or herself. Fatigue was setting in, as she'd already been up for over twenty four hours, and running around with the frightened boy on her back didn't make it any easier. When she ran into the third 'wall' of the shield, she knew that time was running out. If she couldn't get out, because of the shield, she knew Lorne and Bates could not get in to help her. She stopped to rest, hiding herself and Torus under a thick bush. Suddenly, Athar appeared and spoke to her.

"Logan Devane, you must get to your ship."

"Little problem with that, your worship, that Wraith back there seems to have put a shield up so I can't get us out of here!" she whispered harshly.

"I am sorry," Athar said, looking sympathetically at the boy.

"Look, even if you hate _me_ , you can't let him have the boy!" she told her.

"I am forbidden to help you."

"I thought you were supposed to protect this world. Everyone should be safe..."

"You are not of this world, nor is the child, I cannot intervene."

Logan looked at her incredulously. "Do you think he'll stop once he's through with us? He'll come after the people in the village next!"

"And only then can I stop him," she said.

"And THAT is why I will not venture into the village," the Wraith appeared about twenty yards from where Athar was standing.

Logan checked her ammunition, cursing herself for not bringing her zat weapon. If she could pump enough rounds into him, they might stand a chance. Problem was, she didn't want to get close enough to him to let him get a hand on her, and it was harder to hit a moving target from the distance she wanted to maintain. With no help coming, either from her men or Athar, she knew she had to risk it. She set Torus down and ordered him to stay put, then stood and aimed her weapon at the advancing Wraith.

The Wraith gave her what could only pass for a smirk and stopped. "You will not defeat me, human."

"I'm not alone...The others will kill you even if I don't," she replied evenly.

"That is unlikely."

Without another word, she began firing at him non-stop. He was surprisingly agile and was able to dodge her shots without getting hit more than twice. When she ran out of ammo, she tossed her P-90 aside, took out her sidearm and began firing that. She managed to hit him one more time, but all that seemed to do was anger him more. She ran back and scooped Torus up in her arms and began running again, but she soon came up against the fourth 'wall' of the shield. Completely out of options she held the boy tightly against her, shielding his face by burying it against her shoulder. She turned once more to Athar.

"You _have to_ save him!" she shouted.

"I cannot."

"He's just a baby!" she cried desperately.

"I am...sorry..."

"John will _hate_ you for this!" she warned.

"He knows I can do nothing." she countered quietly.

"That won't matter! He will still hate you! You think you know him but you _don't_. There is soooo much more to him that he held back from you."

"I am sorry I cannot help you... but you are wrong about John. I know him better than you could ever possibly hope to know him. He survived your loss once and now he knows he can do it again. In time, he will come to understand."

"Never. He will never understand and he will never forgive you for this."

Logan turned again and saw the Wraith advancing nearer. He was now only ten yards away, and practically salivating. She took a deep breath and clung tightly to Torus, trying to back away as much as she could.

"Take me, but spare the child." she said.

"You are in no position to bargain, human."

"True enough," Logan nodded, gently lowering Torus to the ground before picking up a couple of fallen branches and stepping in front of him. "But I won't make it easy for you."

"So much the better," the Wraith eyed her hungrily. "I will savor the taste of your defiance."

With that, he lunged at her. She shouted for Torus to stay behind her - to keep her in front of him no matter what - as she desperately used the broken tree braches to fend off the attack. (All that training with Teal'c and Teyla was about to come in handy.) She wasn't about to let the Wraith feed on the boy. Not as long as she could draw breath. She held her own, for a while, but was quickly tiring. The Wraith was nearly twice her size and much, much stronger. She was on no sleep and hadn't eaten all day. Athar continued to watch, her face expressionless, as Logan grew weaker with fatigue. One of the branches had broken across the thigh of the Wraith and the momentary distraction gave him just enough of an opening to land a fierce blow across her face. She flew twenty feet through the air to land with a thud, knocking the wind out of her. Torus hurriedly scramble up to her and tried to help her off the ground. She set him behind her again and staggered to her feet.

"Such spirit," the Wraith taunted. "I have not tasted such strength in so long..." he lunged again.

She batted at his head with her remaining branch but he quickly rebounded and struck her again. He was on top of her before she could move, holding her by the throat with one hand as he tore her tac-vest open with the other. Terror washed over her as he lifted his feeding hand, but she refused to let it show. Her own hand fell upon something cold and hard as she tried in vain to push him off of her. She could hear Torus screaming for Athar to help, and saw nothing but red as the boy's pleas fell upon deaf ears. If the Wraith got her, Torus would have no one to protect him. Her hand wrapped around the cold steel attached to his belt, pulled it free and plunged the tip into the Wraith's feeding hand just as he brought it down toward her chest.

He screamed in rage and pain, pulling back enough for Logan to kick him off of her. He fell backwards, driving his own knife in deeper as he fell onto it trying to catch himself. Logan wriggled away, motioning for Torus to run as far as he could. She pulled her own knife free of her boot, and slowly backed away from her opponent. Having had enough of the game, the Wraith pulled out his stunner and pointed it at her with his uninjured hand. She threw herself sideways to avoid the blast, and managed to dodge three more before he finally hit her. She slumped to the ground, completely unable to move. He laughed then, and slowly pulled the knife from his hand and watched as the wound began to close over. It would only be a moment before he could feed, and that would restore him further. She stared up at him defiantly, unable to speak, but unwilling to give him the satisfaction of seeing just how afraid she really was.

A split second later, before he could lay a hand on her, a puddle jumper appeared overhead and fired upon the standing Wraith. It had been a finely threaded needle, to say the least, but every shot missed her and slammed into the Wraith, driving him back just far enough that they could launch a drone at him. When the dust settled, she looked up in time to see the jumper land and Sheppard come running down the ramp toward her. Torus raced for Sheppard, launching himself into his arms just as he reached Logan's side. He wrapped his arms around both Torus and Logan, trembling every bit as much as the two of them.

"Are you guys okay?" he asked.

Torus buried his face in Sheppard's neck and Logan couldn't speak, but managed a weak grunt.

"You were overdue..." he breathed. "And I knew... I just knew something was wrong."

He looked into her eyes, as if to assure himself that she was really okay. She was staring at him intently. Wondering how he'd gotten past the shield, no doubt.

"Looks like the energy field only went around you, not _over_ you," he explained.

Sheppard then turned to look at Athar. "You were gonna let him have them, weren't you?"

"I could not intervene," she said sadly. "You know that, John."

Sheppard looked at her in disbelief and horror. "Lose my number," he hissed coldly. Without another word he carried Logan and herded Torus into the back of the jumper and took off to find Lorne and Bates. They were standing by Logan's jumper, anger and adrenaline coursing through their bodies at their inability to find Logan in time to help her with the Wraith. Both more than a little pissed off at the 'benevolent' Ancient who'd refused to help her or the boy at all. He sent Bates and Lorne off with that jumper and kept Torus with him and Logan, so he could give the boy a stern talking-to about stowing away on military vessels. Well, _any_ vessels really.

"I'm sowwy, Colonel Sheppard," Torus' voice was meek and quavering as Sheppard knelt in front of him in the back of the jumper.

"I know you are, Torus, but you have to understand that what you did was very dangerous. You not only put yourself in danger, but you put those who came looking for you in danger as well. Not to mention the fact that you scared your mother in the process."

"I didn't mean to," he sniffed.

"I know that, too. I'm not angry at you, Torus. Okay?" Sheppard eyed him seriously. He didn't want to let the boy off the hook too easily, but he felt it prudent to soften the scolding, considering everything he'd just been through.

"Okay."

"Do you understand now why it is that we can't take you on missions with us? That it's not a game?"

Torus nodded vigorously.

"You sure?"

"Yessir," he sniffed again.

"Okay. Now when we get back, I want you to apologize to your mother, Colonel Devane, Major Lorne, and Sergeant Bates."

"Yessir."

"Good boy," Sheppard ruffled his hair and set him in the back of the jumper, securing him with his belt so they boy couldn't run around while Sheppard was trying to fly.

As the jumper climbed into orbit, he could see the other one just entering the stargate. Suddenly, the hatch slid closed between the cockpit and the rear compartment.

"John," Athar appeared beside him.

"I have nothing to say to you," he said through clenched teeth.

"I thought you understood."

"Yeah...so did I. But that was _before_ I saw that you were willing to let that Wraith... have... Logan and Torus."

"I couldn't do anything as long as he was not threatening my people."

"You, of all...people...You _know_ what she means to me! Add to that, the fact that you were willing to stand by and watch an innocent boy..." he shook his head and looked her in the eye. "You're not the person I thought you were."

"John..."

"No Athar! Now if you'll excuse us, we're about to go back home," he said coldly, indicating the open stargate directly in front of them.

Athar vanished just before Sheppard entered the gate, and he did so without looking back. He parked the jumper in time to see Lorne and Bates heading for the door. Releasing the hatch, he went back and let a subdued Torus out of his restraints. Torus sheepishly approached Logan and tentatively reached out to touch her hair. She managed somewhat of a reassuring smile before Sheppard scooped her up in his arms and called for Torus to follow him. She had promised to return the boy to Lyta herself, but due to her condition, she would have to rely on Sheppard to do the honors. Beckett burst into the jumper bay, two of his assistants right behind him, pushing a gurney - clearly meant for her. Lyta and Kitah were two paces behind them and Lyta cried out for her son the moment she saw him with Sheppard. He nodded at the boy and he raced off to his mother's waiting arms. Lyta was clearly horrified at the sight of a bruised and bloodied Logan, and she could do nothing at the moment to reassure her.

"Right then," Beckett approached Sheppard. "I'll take it from here, Colonel."

Sheppard was loathe to release her, after the scare they'd just gone through, but reluctantly set her down on top of the gurney, then took her hand in his. She couldn't feel the reassuring squeeze her gave her, but she could see the love and caring in his eyes as he walked with Beckett and his team to the infirmary.

THE FOLLOWING MORNING

At Beckett's insistence, Sheppard had been shooed out of the infirmary to grab a shower and eat some food. Reluctant as he was to leave, Daniel had arrived to check on her, so Sheppard finally agreed to take a short break. After he'd gone, Logan woke up to find Daniel's handsome face smiling down at her. He hugged her fiercely, reiterating how happy he was that Sheppard had reached her in time, and how incredibly angry he was at Athar for standing idly by and allowing the Wraith to come after her and Torus.

"I have to admit, I'm surprised... I thought for sure you'd be a little more 'understanding' about her position," Logan arched an eyebrow at him.

Daniel shook his head, "Oh, I _understand_. That doesn't mean I agree with her. She should have helped you and yes, you're damn right that I think she _could_ have without incurring the wrath of the others."

"I know you would never just stand by and let it happen, Daniel."

"No, I wouldn't, I couldn't...Remember Abydos?"

She nodded solemnly, "I could never forget...Skaara, all the others...That's just one of the reasons I have for not trusting the Ascended ones. That and many others."

"John must be _sick_ about what happened."

Logan nodded and looked out the window. "Yes," was all she could say.

"Look, I know you must be exhausted, so I'm just gonna sit here until John gets back, so you can rest," he murmured.

Before she could respond, Sheppard appeared. She looked up at him, seeing the anguish in his eyes, and almost lost it. The moment Daniel excused himself, he scooped her up in his arms and held her tightly against him. She buried her face against the side of his neck and let the tears flow.

"I'm sorry," she croaked.

"Sorry? For what?" he asked.

"For costing you your girlfriend."

" _She_ did that, Sparks, not you. and if I'm being perfectly honest, I'd have to say it's no great loss."

"I can't believe she was going to just stand by and let that Wraith feed on that poor baby..." she cried.

"Or you," he reminded her.

"I told him to take me and leave the boy, but..."

"It's over now," he cooed. You're both safe."

"How DID you know?" she asked.

"Are you _kidding_? I always know when you need me, just like you always know when I need you."

She nodded and held on tighter. "I was so scared... I didn't want to give that Wraith the satisfaction of letting him see it, but I was so scared."

"I know. Even if Caldwell hadn't approved it, nothing would have kept me from coming after you," he told her.

"I know...Thanks...Thanks for coming after us, and for loving me enough to do it no matter what."

"Always, Sparky. Always."


	18. Chapter 18

The arrival of General Hammond was cause for celebration in Atlantis. George Hammond was much loved, by both civilian and military personnel. Logan was given the honor of escorting him around the city and then around the planet. All the reports he'd read, and video he'd seen didn't begin to do the place justice. He'd been equally enchanted by the people of Athos, when she took him to the mainland to introduce him to their closest friends in the galaxy.

A dinner party was being held in his honor, prior to his departure for Genoa that evening. SG-1 had joined them for dinner and to escort him to his new post . He was pleased to see that all of his people appeared to be thriving in their home away from home.

Seeing Teal'c with Teyla Emmagan, he understood why Teal'c hadn't resisted the reassignment to Pegasus. Of course, Daniel Jackson had always wanted to come here. Cameron Mitchell was happy to be anywhere as long as he was part of a stargate team. And Samantha Carter was dying to get hold of and master as much of the Ancient technology as possible, even if that meant working so closely with Rodney McKay. Although, she had to admit that McKay wasn't nearly as annoying as he'd been back on Earth.

All in all, and Wraith threat aside, the mission to Pegasus had been more successful than they had ever dreamed it could be.

FOUR MONTHS LATER

Logan turned down the hall just in time to see Shannon begin to lose her balance and tip over. Rushing forward, she caught the woman before she could take a header down the stairs. "Easy there, sailor, don't have your sea legs today?" she teased.

A very round, very pregnant Shannon grimaced at her. "Apparently not," she replied.

"You okay, Shannon? You're getting awfully close to your due date, maybe you ought to just take it easy?" Logan eyed her warily. Caldwell had confided that Shannon was probably doing more than she should at this point in her pregnancy and he was concerned about her.

"I don't think I know how to do that," she chuckled.

Logan bent over, patting the round belly in front of her and cooing softly to the baby within. She and Shannon had developed a close friendship over the past two years. She'd been delighted when Shannon shared the happy, yet VERY unexpected news with her. Happy for both Steve and Shannon. She was looking forward to playing "Auntie" for the new arrival.

"Where are you going, anyway?"

"I was going to hitch a ride to the mainland. This'll probably be my last chance to go, for a while, and I just want to gather up all my research before the baby comes."

"I'll take you...If Dr. Beckett has cleared you for flight?" Logan arched an eyebrow at her.

"He has...For goodness sake, I have six weeks to go!" she chided the younger woman.

"Still...We can't have Junior here popping out in mid-flight, trying to fly the jumper on his or her own, can we?" Logan teased, as she linked arms with Shannon and escorted her to the jumper bay.

Within minutes they were safely ensconced in a jumper and winging their way toward the mainland. Fifteen minutes later, they were chatting happily and making plans for the baby when, out of nowhere another ship appeared in the sky above them, setting off proximity alarms within the jumper.

"What the...?" Logan muttered.

Suddenly the ship opened fire on them, buffeting them wildly as each shot bounced off the outer hull.

"Wraith?" asked a frightened Shannon.

"It's not a dart... I don't know what it is!" Logan keyed her mic and sent out a distress call to the city.

"Atlantis, this is Devane! We're taking fire, repeat, we are taking fire!" she shouted. "Enemy unknown... doesn't appear to be Wraith...I can't tell..."

Shannon kept watch on the monitors, trying to determine what kind of ship was attacking them, without warning or provocation. So far the computer had been unable to get a lock on the ship long enough to find a match to known ships in their galaxy. Logan was returning fire as best she could while still maintaining control of the jumper.

"Hang on!" she called out as tried to maneuver away from an incoming blast. The blast caught the tail end of the jumper and sent them spinning. A second blast knocked one of the drive pods out completely. In a last ditch effort, Logan managed to send a single drone after the offending craft and finally blew it out of the sky. It was too late for their jumper, however. Alarms were sounding all over the place, and the jumper began to descend at an odd angle.

"Atlantis...We are going down...Exact position unknown, but we're nowhere near the mainland...We are 'feet-wet'...Acknowledge?" Logan called.

"Logan? It's Caldwell..."

Shannon gasped, fear and pain contorting her features. "Steven!" she cried as the jumper hurled into the vast ocean.

Atlantis was in chaos. People were running around, checking monitors and trying desperately to get a lock on the signal Logan sent out before abruptly being cut off. The blank screens, indicating no ships, friendly or otherwise, were airborne in the skies above the planet did little to offer comfort to those who searched. Sheppard came flying down the hall, stopping only briefly to make eye contact with Caldwell before lurching up the stairs leading to the jumper bay. They needed no words.

"Find them!" was written clearly in Caldwell's eyes, not that Sheppard needed that to spur him into action. Within five minutes, five jumpers were airborne and headed in the direction Logan had taken to get to the mainland.

The five teams in the jumpers divided the area into a grid and began to search meticulously for any sign of the downed jumper. Sheppard was frantic, but held tight control on his churning emotions. The inertial dampeners should have protected the occupants inside and shields should have prevented the jumper from breaking up upon impact with the water, after that? It depended on how badly damaged her jumper was in the attack and... how fast she was going when she hit the water. He pushed aside all conscious thought about who or what might have been responsible for the attack and focused all of his energies on finding and saving Logan and Dr. Caldwell. "Anything boys?" he called on the open channel.

"Nothing yet," came back the reply from the four other jumpers.

Back in the city, Weir had pulled Caldwell aside, taking him to her office. His understandable concern over the fate of his wife and unborn child was only compounded by his concern over one of his officers - though not just ANY officer. Try as she might, she could not find the words adequate enough to comfort or reassure him.

"Logan will take care of her, Steven."

Caldwell nodded. "I know."

"If anyone can get them through this, it's Logan."

"I know that, too." And he did. He also knew that the words Weir had left unspoken were:

"If she's able."

Both Logan and Shannon were knocked unconscious by the impact with the water, so they were spared the horror of seeing the jumper completely engulfed by the ocean. Fortunately, however, as quickly as it disappeared beneath the surface it rose again.

Logan was the first to regain consciousness and she immediately went to Shannon, who was lying on the floor with blood streaming from her head. "Shannon?" she called out to her as she checked her over for other injuries.

She was rewarded by a low groan. "Hey, lie still, let me check you over."

Shannon obeyed and simply watched in silence as Logan checked her from head to toe. She knew her arm was broken without Logan telling her, and there was a dull ache emanating from somewhere around her rib cage. "The baby?" she asked fearfully.

"Still with us," she smiled, putting the older woman's hand on her own belly, where she could feel the telltale fluttering of her unborn child. Fluttering? More like tantrumming!

Logan excused herself to grab the medical kit. Using the stethoscope she was able to find the baby's heartbeat, and she allowed Shannon to hear the strong rythymic beat for herself so she would know that her baby was alright. Once she had staunched the bleeding from a gash over Shannon's right eye, and immobilized her broken arm, Logan set about assessing the damage to the downed jumper. The radio was out, as was her personal one. Only secondary power systems were operational, and it was blatantly obvious that this jumper would never fly again.

"Logan!" Shannon suddenly called out in alarm.

"What's wrong?" But when she turned around, what was wrong became all too clear: Water was seeping inside the jumper, slowly but steadily.

"We're sinking..." Shannon said, almost clinically.

The search party had been out for over two hours and still they turned up nothing. Initially following the logic that they should begin the search along the flight path that Logan would have taken enroute to the mainland, Sheppard had to concede that she'd likely had to fly off course and in no discernable pattern while she was evading the attacking ship. Putting himself in her shoes, he knew that she would try to put the jumper in at least as close a proximity to her original flight plan as possible. However, that would be entirely dependent on the condition of the jumper and the amount of control she had over it. He harbored no illusions about the fact that the jumper had to have gone down, there was no question.

"Okay fellas, let's expand the search grid. Jumpers 2 and 3, take the northwest quandrant, 4 and 5 take northeast. I'll go right up the middle."

"Yes, sir," came four replies.

To himself, he murmured quietly, "Hang in there, Logan. I'm coming."

ON THE SURFACE

The jumper bobbed unsteadily on the swells while Logan struggled to pull together enough supplies to last as long as possible, giving the two women a fighting chance. Shannon was quiet, though Logan could tell she was terrified and likely in more pain than she was letting on. As soon as she had pulled all the supplies she could fit in the raft, along with them, she lowered the ramp and pulled the release valve on the inflatable raft. Once that was done, she turned back and helped Shannon slowly and carefully get to her feet. Shannon winced in pain, but did not cry out. If she hadn't already won Logan's respect and friendship, her behavior during this crisis certainly would have sealed the deal.

"Okay...just a few more steps..." she eased the woman over the side of the raft and then shoved the thing into the churning water.

She didn't need to look up at the sky to know there was a storm coming, but there was nothing she else she could do. The jumper was rapidly going under and they needed to get far enough away to avoid the undertow. After one more look around, Logan dove into the water and swam the short distance to where the raft had already moved. She climbed aboard and pulled out a waterproof tarp to drape over them, thereby avoiding the worst effects of the oncoming deluge. For the hundredth time since they'd gone down, she sent up a silent plea for Sheppard to find them... and _fast_. She knew without question that he was out there - somewhere - trying desperately to find them.

"How're you doing, Shannon?"

"I'm just peachy," she grinned weakly, wincing against the increasing pain she was experiencing.

"You're a real trooper, doc. They'll find us soon," Logan assured her.

"That'd be nice," her voice quavered as an uncontrollable bout of shivering took hold of her.

Logan pulled out one of the special "space" blankets, as they referred to them, and wrapped it around the woman, then squeezed in behind her, so she could wrap her arms around the frightened woman. She just hoped that their luck would hold long enough for help to arrive. At least the baby seemed to be...

"Aaaaahhh!" Shannon cried out suddenly.

"What's wrong?" Logan asked.

"The baby!"

"That's not funny, Shannon!"

"I'm not kidding!" she began to tense up again.

"No, you're _not_! You stop that right now, do you hear me? We are not delivering your baby on a raft in the middle of the freakin ocean!" Logan mockingly scolded her.

"I think the baby has other ideas!" Shannon cried out as they both heard a gush of water that had nothing to do with the churning seas around them.

ATLANTIS

"It's been seven hours and still no sign," Caldwell shook his head.

"There's still hope, Steven," Weir assured him. "You have to hold onto that."

"I'm trying," he assured her.

By this time, SG-1 and General Hammond had arrived in the city. SG-1 had gone out in a jumper to join in the search, and Hammond had taken over directing the search from the control room.

There was nothing for Caldwell to do but wait.

LANTEAN OCEAN

Shannon's labor progressed quickly. Too quickly. And at the worst possible time. Logan was alternating between caring for her and battling to keep the raft afloat during the height of the storm. The surge of the waves had miraculously carried them within view of the mainland, though she had no idea what part of the was demonstrating extreme bravery in the face of dire circumstances. Logan knew that Caldwell would be so proud of her and the way she was handling the situation.

Through sheer force of will, Logan managed to land the raft on the beach without losing any of their supplies, or themselves for that matter. Once they hit the beach, Logan helped Shannon out of the raft, so she could pull it far enough away from the waves and within the sheltering branches of several close-growing trees. Then she settled Shannon back in the raft and set about getting her ready to deliver her baby. Upon doing a more complete exam, Logan found that Shannon was having more difficulty than the older woman had let on. She had begun bleeding profusely, and her color had gone deathly pale. But more than that, she had also begun coughing up blood.

"Shannon...Are you having pain besides the labor?"

"It's not bad," the woman gasped.

Logan looked her right in the eye. "Listen to me, Shan, you have to tell me where it hurts. I need to know what's going on in there besides an impatient baby."

"I have to focus...the baby..." she gasped as another wave of pain hit her hard.

"The baby's still okay, but he or she needs you to be okay, too. Now tell me."

"Here," she coughed up more blood as she pointed to her ribs.

"Okay...You should have told me. You may have broken a rib or two, are you having a hard time breathing?"

"A little," she coughed.

There was nothing Logan could do, in their present predicament, to stop the internal bleeding, and she knew she had to get the baby out of her so that Shannon would have the strength to fight for herself. She checked her progress again and saw that she was fully dilated.

"Okay Shan, you ready to meet your baby?"

Shannon nodded, gritted her teeth and pushed.

"Easy, now, take it easy...If you push too hard, you're going to do yourself more harm than good. Listen to me, Shan, focus..."

Shannon could feel herself getting weaker by the moment. "Logan!" she cried.

"You're doing great, Shan, you're doing just great. I am _so_ proud of you! Breathe, now..."

"Logan, listen to me..." the woman grabbed her hand and squeezed it tight. "Please...You must promise me..."

"Shannon, it's okay, you're doing fine." Logan shook her head, knowing what the older woman wanted to tell her.

"No...sweetie, I'm not..."

"Yes you are! You're going to be fine. They're going to find us, and you and your baby are going to be fine..." she brushed away the tears that suddenly rolled down her cheeks.

"Logan, we both know I'm not going to make it. Please, promise me, no matter what...You have to save the baby."

"Shannon..."

"No! _Promise_ me. You have been the best friend... I trust you to make sure my baby is...okay...Please..."

"You know I will, Shan, I'll take care of both of you and I'll get you back to Steve!" she promised.

"Tell Steven...tell him...I love him...Help him..." She stopped talking so she could push through another contraction. "Help him, Logan...You are the only one who can get through to him...The only one he trusts completely..."

She cried out from the pain, and Logan focused on the tiny, dark haired crown just coming into view.

"I promise, Shannon, I won't let anything happen to your baby. But you need to stay with me, okay...?"

She was rapidly giving in to the darkness. She could feel her strength ebbing with every breath. She knew Logan would be devastated, but all she could focus on now was bringing her baby into the world. With her last breath, she pushed the wriggling, slippery infant from her body.

"He's here, Shan, and he's a beauty!" Logan cried as she hurriedly wiped the baby's body and cleared his breathing passages. She reached down and picked up the boot lace she'd discarded earlier and tied off the umbilical cord, wrapped him in a second space blanket, then held up the baby triumphantly.

"You _see_? Look what you've done!" she cried.

Shannon was pale and still. Her face now relaxed and her eyes closed.

"Shan?" her heart pounded as she realized her friend was no longer breathing. "Shannon, **NO**!" she screamed, gently placing the crying baby down to the side.

She checked for a pulse, and upon getting none, she began CPR. "Please don't do this, Shannon. Please don't leave us!"

Sheppard found her an hour later. Huddled, wet and crying with a newborn infant in her arms. He saw the shape of what was obviously a body under a tarp and knew immediately what had happened. He gathered both Logan and the baby into his arms and carried them back to the jumper and motioned for Bates and McKay to retrieve Shannon Caldwell's body and follow him. Beckett was still in the jumper, getting medical supplies ready, when he saw Sheppard walk up the ramp carrying Logan and the infant.

One look at Sheppard's face told him everything he needed to know. Logan was inconsolable, and refused to let anyone take the baby from her, so Beckett began his cursory exam while she held the wailing infant. She didn't speak, and she couldn't look as McKay and Bates gently laid Shannon Caldwell's body on the seat in the back of the jumper.

As much as he wanted to hold and comfort Logan, Sheppard knew that the best thing would be getting all of them back to Atlantis as quickly as possible. He shut the door between the cockpit and the rear compartment, then radioed ahead to let Hammond know what they had found. Hammond had instructed Caldwell to wait in the infirmary for the jumper to arrive. He had tried to shield him from the truth, but he already knew that something terrible had happened and demanded to know the truth now rather than hear it when the jumper arrived. With Weir at his side, Hammond explained what Sheppard had found when he finally located the life raft on a beach at the mainland. He maintained a stoic facade, but Weir knew he had been shaken to the core.

When they landed, Logan allowed herself to be placed on a gurney without a fight, but she still wouldn't allow anyone to take the infant from her. Sheppard accompanied the medical staff to the infirmary, with Bates and McKay bearing the gurney carrying Shannon Caldwell's body. Beckett led the way, and began barking orders to the nurses, and calling for someone to get him some baby formula. Caldwell waited, only his eyes betraying the turmoil within. A single tear slid down his cheek as he saw Logan wheeled in, holding his child in her arms. She hadn't spoken a word since they'd found her, but she stood now, drawing Caldwell aside for privacy. With tears streaming down her face, she looked into Caldwell's pain-filled eyes, then placed the squirming infant in his arms.

"Sir," she croaked. "It is my honor... to introduce you to your... son," her voice creaked with emotion. "I regret to inform you... that his mother...your wife...died in childbirth...from internal...injuries...sustained in the crash of our jumper..." She took a deep breath and continued on. "Shannon demonstrated an unprecedented courage and dignity...in facing her...death, but not before she made sure that your son would live... She asked me to tell you, sir... how much she loved you..." Logan began to sob and couldn't speak anymore.

Caldwell, too, began to sob as he took Logan in his arms, with his son.

Beckett motioned them all out of the room, and this time, even Sheppard obeyed without question.


	19. Chapter 19

The memorial service for Shannon Caldwell was held three days later, without her body, which had been transported back to Earth for burial beside her first husband, Samuel Caldwell. With a strength only those who were very close to her knew that she possessed, Logan gave a moving and tearful eulogy. Even those who hadn't known Shannon well were moved to tears as Logan spoke of her friend's courage and strength, as well as her wit and intelligence. Upon finishing her eulogy Logan sat down, held securely in Sheppard's embrace, and listened to the rest of the service in silence. Caldwell sat in front of them, his infant son cradled in his arms. He spoke only to thank everyone for their support and for honoring his wife by attending her service. A pall hung over the city, which seemed somehow darker despite the summer sunshine, since the downing of Logan's jumper and subsequent death of Steven Caldwell's wife.

For three days, Logan kept to herself, speaking to no one, including Sheppard, until the memorial. She divided her time between her own quarters and the nursery that had been set up in the infirmary for Caldwell's slightly premature son. Sheppard would find her in there, rocking or feeding the infant. The death of Shannon Caldwell had hit them all hard, but none so hard as Caldwell himself and Logan, who had struggled so desperately to save her friend but couldn't. It gutted Sheppard to see the cold sadness in her eyes, where once there had been a bright light. Knowing there were no words he could use to console her, he did all he could do: simply be there for her.

Hammond took her off rotation, and ordered that she begin sessions with Dr. Heightmeyer before even considering going back to work. He ordered the same for Caldwell, once he returned from burying his wife on Earth. Sheppard closely monitored her visitors, allowing only those who were closest to her to visit with her. Daniel, Teal'c, Hammond, Caldwell, Carter, Mitchell, Weir, Teyla and even O'Neill, who had gated in for the memorial service. None of them could get her to talk, but she did acknowledge their presence when they came by.

Beckett had recommended against taking the newborn through the gate, so Caldwell reluctantly agreed to leave his son in the care of Beckett and Logan until he returned. She bid him a tearful farewell in the infirmary, but did not follow him to the gateroom to see him off, choosing instead to remain with the infant, whose parents had charged her with his care.

ONE MONTH LATER

Sheppard found her sitting alone in her favorite spot on the southwest pier. She was staring out to sea, lost in her own world and didn't hear him approach, so she was startled when he reached down to stroke her hair. The look in her eyes was so bleak, it broke his heart. For weeks he'd tried breaking through the wall she'd built around herself. The wall she'd only open up to tiny Samuel Shannon Caldwell, the name Caldwell had given his infant son, in honor of the brother he'd lost as well as the mother who'd given her own life to save his.

Sheppard sat down behind her and pulled her back into his chest, wrapping his arms securely around her and resting his chin on the top of her head. He shared with her, as always, news of their missions, and talked about what was happening with the people they both cared about. As always, she sat silently and listened, but did not speak. Unable to bear her desperate sadness, he finally called her on it, as Heightmeyer suggested he do.

"Logan, please... I need you to talk to me," he pleaded.

She reached up and gently caressed his stubbled cheek, but didn't speak.

"Let me help you," he begged.

This time she looked up briefly and then back out to sea with merely a shrug, as though at a loss as to how he could do that. She couldn't even help herself.

"You can't keep doing this. You're stronger than this. Shannon wouldn't want you to..."

He was cut off by her sudden turn and angry glare at the mention of Shannon Caldwell's name.

"No, Sparks..." he shook his head. "It's been a month already and you won't talk to anyone. Not even me. You can't honestly believe she would want you to lose yourself in the grief like this! That doesn't honor her or her memory. We need you back...*I* need you..."

Her eyes flashed angrily again, a good sign according to Heightmeyer. She stared him down for a moment before the anger started to dissipate, only to be replaced by heart-rending sadness. Her eyes began to fill with tears, and he decided to push her just a little bit more.

"Please, Sparks... Please come back... Come back to me?" he begged.

The floodgates opened, and the tears began cascading down her face. Her body was wracked by soul-wrenching sobs she could not control. Sheppard held her as she burrowed into his warm, secure embrace, burying her face against his chest as he maneuvered her onto his lap.

"That's it, sweetie, just let it all out," he murmured softly.

"I tried," she wailed. "I tried to... save... her... but... I...couldn't...She... trusted me... And I...couldn't..."

"It's not your fault, Logan. Everyone knows you did everything humanly possible. Even Beckett says that if he been there, HE couldn't even have saved her with surgery. You have to let go of the guilt..."

Logan continued to sob for the better part of an hour before she was finally too exhausted to cry anymore. Sheppard rocked her on his lap, cooing and whispering to her until she drifted off to sleep. She hadn't been sleeping well at all, since Shannon's death, so he let her sleep where she was until he was sure that she was so deeply asleep that moving her wouldn't wake her. Then he gently picked her up and carried her back to his quarters.

THREE DAYS LATER

"She needs to hear that from you," Heightmeyer said firmly.

"She has. I told her, from day one, that I didn't hold her responsible for what happened to Shannon."

"Yes, but she needs to hear it again, now that time has passed and you've both had a chance to process more. Colonel Devane has had a significant breakthrough, thanks to Colonel Sheppard, but she still has a ways to go. She's more *ready* now to actually HEAR you and BELIEVE when you tell her that you don't hold her responsible."

Caldwell shrugged, "Okay... I'll do whatever I can to help. Does this mean she's finally speaking again? I mean besides about the baby?"

Heightmeyer nodded affirmatively. "Primarily to Colonel Sheppard, but she has begun making small talk with Teyla and Dr. Weir and a few others. As I said, she has a ways to go, but I believe the best thing for her, would be to get her back to work as soon as possible. And I don't mean in the infirmary."

"Is she ready for that?" he looked at her in shock.

"No, not yet, but we need to work toward that end. It'll make her feel useful, help her to remember who she is and why she does what she does."

"I can vouch for that," he agreed.

Getting back to work had done wonders to help him begin to put the grief behind him. That, and spending time with the beautiful son Shannon had given him. He'd never believed that he would ever be blessed with a child, but he had, and it wasn't a blessing he was going to take for granted. He would honor Shannon's memory by making sure their son knew how very much she'd loved him, long before he was born. He would make sure that Sammy would grow up *knowing* and loving his mother. As much as he hadn't intended on it, he had grown to love Shannon himself, probably not as much as she deserved, he thought, but he had loved her.

Guessing his train of thought, Heightmeyer brought it into their conversation.

"How IS your son?"

Caldwell smiled brightly, "He's, uh, great. Growing like a weed, and with the grip of a titan!" he chuckled.

"Who's watching him now? And while you're at work?"

"An Athosian woman, Lyta...Dr. Weir suggested her as a nanny, since she has a young son of her own, and is a widow herself."

"And how's that working out for you?" she asked.

"Very well. She's wonderful with him."

"I imagine that it was difficult having to explain the need for a nanny to Colonel Devane."

"She... actually... she seems fine with it. She likes Lyta and trusts her with the baby. She promised Shannon that she would make sure her son was safe and happy, and she knows that he is with Lyta."

That surprised Heightmeyer, but in a good way. "Good. That should make it easier for her to separate herself from him when it's time to go back to work."

Logan gradually found her way back to herself, though it was a slow, painstaking process. Her biggest strides were made after she was finally able to tell Caldwell, in vivid detail, everything that happened following the attack on their jumper. In talking to him, she was finally able to let go of much of the guilt she'd been holding onto. Hearing from him that he still didn't hold her accountable for what happened to Shannon, and REALLY hearing it this time, did wonders towards helping her to let go of that guilt.

Sheppard, as always, was her rock. He spent every free moment with her, letting her talk, or simply just keeping her company. It also helped just being with baby Sam. The boy looked more and more like his mother everyday, and he seemed to have her temperament as well, which was probably a good thing.

She dutifully attended every one of her therapy sessions with Dr. Heightmeyer, but even the good doctor had to admit that Logan had come a long way with no thanks to her. It had been Sheppard, Caldwell and Sammy who'd done the most to get Logan past her crisis. Still, it was what she had to do in order to be restored to full duty. Two weeks weeks after her initial breakthrough, Logan was allowed to go back to work. She was welcomed happily by her team, who had missed her tremendously, and all four stepped through the gate with smiles plastered across their faces.

Smiling, too, were Sheppard, Weir, Caldwell and Hammond.


	20. Chapter 20

Six months had passed since Logan returned to work. In that time, they had discovered the location of two more abandoned Ancient cities. Neither of them were intact. It was apparent that the Wraith had located these two cities and destroyed them in the last great battle before the Ancients fled Pegasus.

What they did find, however, were survivors who'd fled to those worlds from their own after the Wraith left years before. while the city itself was not viable, they'd built a new village and carved out a comfortable existence, relatively safe from the Wraith. One civilzation was comprised of males and females with children, no surprise there, but the other one consisted of all females. Logan, Sam and Teyla and Lt. Biggs had been specially chosen for this assignment - a first contact situation - because no one was sure how an all-female population would take to male intruders, although Lorne and Bates were eager to find out.

The women on Takada were certainly curious about the newcomers, and equally as friendly. They showed Logan around their village while Carter, Biggs and Teyla chatted with the other women. Toward the end of the tour, her guide, Doru, was startled when Logan's radio kicked on suddenly and she heard the sound of Caldwell's voice. Doru looked at her in astonishment as Logan explained that the voice she was hearing was being transmitted from their home on another world through the radio she carried.

"It is...he?" she asked curiously.

"The voice?" Doru nodded. "Yes, that voice belongs to our... uh...Chief. He is a very strong leader."

"A...man?" Doru asked again, her eyes round with wonder.

"Yes...Very much so..." she smiled.

"You have...others?"

"Yes, there are other men."

"Many?"

"Well, I don't know about 'many' but yes there are more," Logan replied, studying her face closely. She didn't seem to be exhibiting any hostility, just curiosity and... wonder.

"They will... come... here?" Doru asked, her eyes alight with hope.

"Uh...not if you don't want them to. If you're afraid..."

"No! We do not fear them, we welcome everyone!" she stated vehemently, cutting her off.

Logan could not detect any underlying meaning in her tone or manner, but she thought it best to consult the others, especially Teyla. The four women met up to discuss what they'd learned so far.

"The last of the men died six years ago, not that there were that many to begin with." Carter explained.

"And they don't use the stargate to travel to other worlds because they're afraid it will bring the Wraith." Teyla answered the other question Logan was about to ask.

"So they haven't been around men all this time? No wonder Doru seemed so enthralled by the thought of us bringing men here." Logan chuckled.

"They are... lonely. Desperate, even. No child has been born here in many years, their youngest is fourteen,." Teyla told her.

"It could be dangerous, then, to bring any men here." Logan stated.

"I agree," Carter said.

"I know of more than a few who would LOVE to visit this place," quipped Biggs.

"It might end up being even more than THEY bargained for!" Logan chuckled again.

"We should bring Daniel in on this," Carter began.

"You want to bring DANIEL here?!" Logan sputtered. "They'd take one look at him and eat him for lunch!"

"Daniel Jackson _is_ very attractive," Teyla agreed.

Carter laughed at the image of Daniel being swarmed by the village amazons. "I just meant that we should, at least, consult with Daniel."

Logan eyed her dubiously. "Uh-huh... And Daniel wouldn't be chomping at the bit to come and study their culture first hand?"

"Of course he would. Doesn't mean Caldwell will let him!" she laughed.

BACK ON ATLANTIS

Logan and Carter were filling their commanders in about the situation on Takada. Daniel listened intently and asked a lot of questions as they looked over the video footage Logan and her team recorded in the village.

"They don't seem dangerous." Daniel announced.

Logan coughed. "Um...Daniel...They don't seem dangerous NOW... But these women haven't even _seen_ a man in about six years, and certainly not young, strong..."

"Virile..." Carter interjected.

"...Virile men. The last surviving male was upwards of seventy when he died, so you can imagine how they might react to seeing... well... some of the men we have here..." Logan finished uncomfortably.

"Such as yourself," Carter offered again.

Logan stared at her, trying desperately not to giggle. Sheppard, however, couldn't contain his own amusement.

"So, what do you think they'd do to any man who sets foot in their village?" he teased.

"Well, I dunno, Colonel, what do YOU think they'd do?" she shot back.

"I think our guys could handle them," he grinned.

The ever willing and eager Lorne and Bates were selected to accompany Carter and Logan to Takada, along with Sheppard, Mitchell, Daniel and Teyla. During their visit, a small delegation from Takada would be touring Atlantis and engaging in a type of cultural exchange with Weir and Caldwell. Logan was uneasy about taking so many devastatingly attractive specimens into a lioness den, so to speak. Lorne and Bates would be enough to send those women reeling, but throw in Daniel, Sheppard and Mitchell? They might try to ravage them on the spot!

The delegation from Takada, consisting of three women, arrived just as Sheppard and the others were preparing to depart. Logan introduced the women to her team, trying to keep a straight face as the women all but bowed down at the feet of the men. After that meeting, Lorne and Bates couldn't wait to get to the planet. Upon their arrival, the women led the team to a table in the center of the village, where they had prepared a great feast in honor of their new friends. While the men ate up all the attention, Carter and Logan shared a growing sense of unease. There wasn't really a specific reason for it, none of the women had been even vaguely threatening in any way, but still... It began to gnaw away at Logan's already churning gut.

Twice, during dinner, she noticed that Sheppard seemed to be wincing, as if in pain. She took the opportunity to approach him when Bates and Lorne excused themselves to take up several of the women on their offer of a tour. "What's wrong?" she whispered.

Sheppard shrugged. "I dunno... Indigestion maybe?"

"Where does it hurt?"

Sheppard pointed to his lower right side. "Comes and goes," he muttered. "More annoying than anything else."

Her brow furrowed as she covertly probed the area and he jumped slightly. "How long?"

He shrugged again, "I'm not sure, a while I guess."

"Why didn't you say something? Or have Carson check you over?" she scolded.

"It's not that bad," he winced again as she touched a tender spot.

Logan reached up and felt his forehead. "You have a fever."

"No, I don't," he argued petulantly.

"Yes, you do. And you, my dear, are going home," she told him, in no uncertain terms.

She held up a hand when he tried to protest and looked around for Daniel and Mitchell. She saw them off in the distance, being led around by several women, and Carter was off in the other direction with Teyla.

"Stay right here," she ordered. "I'm going to let Sam know that I'm taking you home." Her tone left no doubt in his mind that he should just shut up and do as he was told.

After she left, Riyan approached Sheppard, smiling timidly.

"Hello," he greeted her.

"May I... sit with you?" she asked.

"Sure," he shrugged.

"What are you called?"

"Sheppard. John Sheppard. And your name is?"

"I am called Riyan."

"That's a very pretty name."

"Thank you," she blushed fiercely, but she could not take her eyes off of him.

"Do you like our village?"

"Yes, it's very...homey."

"Homey?"

"Comfortable." he clarified.

"Good. I am pleased to hear you say that."

"Why is that?"

"If you are to remain..."

"Okay, John, let's go!" Logan said breezily, cutting her off.

"Go?" Riyan asked.

"Yes... Colonel Sheppard is not feeling well, so I need to take him back to our world..."

"NO!" the young woman cried out.

Logan stared at her curiously. "I'm sorry, _No_?"

"You must not take him."

"Actually, yes... I MUST. I told you, he is ill."

Riyan clutched onto Sheppard's arm. "He does not look ill."

Now Logan's spidey senses were blaring loudly. "Not yet, maybe, but he will, more and more as time goes by, so I have to get him to our doctor so he can be... healed."

"No!" she said firmly.

By this time, Doru had approached and took up a position directly behind Riyan.

"Doru, please explain to your friend that I must take Sheppard back home now, or he could..."

"I am afraid I cannot allow that, Colonel Devane."

Logan stared at her open-mouthed. "You cannot allow it? What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, covertly signaling to Carter.

"This man, all the men you brought to us must remain here, on Takada."

This was exactly what she had feared. She understood where they were coming from, but sympathy was all she was prepared to give them.

"I'm afraid that's not going to happen, Doru. Especially not this man," she indicated a slightly paler Sheppard.

"You will be compensated for the loss of your man, if that is your concern."

"No... You misunderstand. I'm not kidding, Colonel Sheppard IS ill. He needs a doctor..."

Sheppard nodded. "I'm not feeling very well."

"We can tend to his needs," Doru assured her.

"You cannot give him the care he needs. Sheppard needs an operation," she explained.

"I do?" he whispered.

She looked up at him. "Appendix," was all she said.

"Appendix?" asked Doru.

"It's a tiny organ inside his stomach that has become infected and it needs to be removed before it bursts, or he will die."

Doru and Riyan looked at her skeptically. "I am afraid we do not believe you," Doru said simply.

At that moment, a group of about twenty women surrounded them, weapons drawn.

"You may come and go freely, but these men will remain here."

Teyla and Carter were herded over to join Logan and Sheppard. Lorne, Bates, Daniel and Mitchell were nowhere to be seen.

"Where are the others?" Logan demanded.

"They are safe."

"Safe WHERE?" she demanded more firmly.

"They are resting."

"You drugged them?" Carter asked.

"There is an herb, used for relaxation. They are unharmed."

"Doru, please, this is not the way to get what you seek. There are many men, scattered upon many other worlds who would be willing to join their tribes with yours. You need not take these men by force," Teyla tried to reason with her.

"If we leave this place, the Wraith will come."

"That's not true. They do not know you are here. And they didn't show up when your representatives went to Atlantis," Teyla reminded her.

"They will if we use the gateway again," Doru argued. "Now, Riyan will take John Sheppard to his new home."

Sheppard now looked slightly alarmed. "Uh... don't I get a vote here?"

"You said you liked our village, that you were comfortable here," Riyan smiled adoringly at him.

Sheppard looked warily at Logan. "I was being polite," he said.

Logan pulled out her gun and stepped right up to Doru, looking her square in the eye. "We can discuss this when I return, but I AM taking this man with me, whether you like it or not. I will not leave him here to die."

"I will not fall for your tricks," Doru said evenly. "I believe you would say anything to keep this man for yourself."

"Is that so? Well, you're right about one thing, I would do anything to keep him safe and healthy, but I'm not tricking you right now. His illness will kill him if he doesn't see our doctor soon."

Weapons were raised on both sides, until Sheppard stepped in. "Logan, don't."

"Are you crazy?" she hissed at him.

"No... but you're outnumbered, and I don't want anything to happen to you before you have a chance to...negotiate our release..." he told her.

"He's right, Logan. We should go," Carter nodded.

"Sam! You can't expect me to leave him here, or any of them?" Logan eyed her warily.

"Sheppard's right about negotiating with them...Perhaps we could bring others for them..." Carter explained.

"You go then. I won't leave him here without ANY medical care..." Logan insisted.

Weir stared in horror at Carter as she explained what had happened on Takada, and about Sheppard's presumed medical condition.

The three women who had come to Atlantis from Takada were still in the city. She'd given up trying to engage any of them in conversation, as they seemed utterly consumed with Colonel Caldwell, particularly Seila. Mirin and Pelu graciously deferred Caldwell to her once they took a look at how many other men there were, who were seemingly unattached.

Weir had been getting the same unsettled feeling all afternoon both Logan and Carter had back on Takada. Now she knew why.

Just then, Caldwell ventured back to the control room, holding his son, while Seila hung rapturously on every word. Weir motioned to Teyla and Carter to look out her office window at them.

"Something tells me the Colonel is going to have a hard time getting away from that one." Weir said.

"Looks like she's definitely cut him from the heard all right," Carter replied.

"At least here, we have them outnumbered. If they become a problem we can always use a stunner on them." Weir was only half-joking.

They watched as Lyta entered the control room and Caldwell introduced the two women. Seila's body language gave the distinct impression that she felt Lyta was intruding on her turf, though she did not say anything. For some reason, Caldwell appeared to be encouraging Seila to go somewhere with Lyta, who took the baby from Caldwell. The two women left together and they watched Caldwell head directly for Weir's office.

"Well, THAT was fun," he snarked.

"Sir, we have bad news." Carter wasted no time.

"What happened?"

He sat there, brows furrowing as Carter explained the situation.

"Great!" he exclaimed. "And Colonel Devane is still there with them?"

"Yes, she refused to leave...all of them... there without protection, or Colonel Sheppard without some kind of medical care. These women are serious, sir."

"They do not seem to be aware, or even care about the consequences of their actions. The only thing they are focused on are the men, on keeping them there. They are not motivated by malice, but...need," Teyla explained.

"I understand that, Teyla, but they need to be made to understand that we cannot, we will not give these men over to them."

TAKADA

Logan convinced the locals to at least move Sheppard to someplace more comfortable, but that was the only concession she was willing to accept. Her fear for Sheppard and her anger over the danger he was in was rapidly reaching a boiling point.

A very sleepy Daniel and Mitchell were also brought to the same hut where she tended to Sheppard. They were left to converse in private, but the women remained, standing guard, just outside and all the way around the crude hut.

"Daniel?"

He tried to focus on her face, which was not an easy task given the drugs and, for some reason, the confiscation of his glasses.

"Logan," he smiled.

"Focus, Daniel!" she snapped. "We need to get out of here!"

He looked thoroughly confused by this statement. "What? Why?"

"These women are refusing to let you go, any of you. I've already sent Teyla and Sam back to Atlantis, but they insist on keeping the men."

"Oh," he yawned. "Well, we can make them see reason in time."

"Daniel, John doesn't HAVE time."

"What do you mean?"

"He's got appendicitis. If I don't get him back to Atlantis, and I mean NOW..."

"Ok, ok...Been there, remember?" he pulled up the corner of his t-shirt to show her his own scar.

"Yes, dear, of course I remember. I was there when you went under the knife. Which is why I know for sure that we don't have much time."

"Won't they let just him go?" Mitchell crawled over to her.

"No. They don't believe me...They don't believe that he's sick. Daniel, if you can't think of anything more diplomatic, that will work in the next five minutes, I will shoot our way out of here!"

Even in his addled state, Daniel knew that tone. He knew she would never leave any of her people in the hands of a perceived enemy. He knew, most of all, that she would do anything she could to protect Sheppard.

"I'll think of something," he murmured.

"Fast...You know I mean it!"

"I know."

"Have you seen Lorne or Bates?" she asked them.

"No..." came the response from both of them.

Logan keyed her mic and called out. "Lorne! Bates!"

When they didn't respond, she tried again. "Lorne, Bates, respond right now!"

"Bates here, ma'am." came the muffled reply.

"Are you with Lorne?"

"Negative," came Lorne's response.

"The both of you need to get to my location...NOW!"

"Uh...how?"

"I don't CARE, Bates. Tell the woman you're with that you need to be brought to Sheppard. Just both of you get here now!" she ordered, leaving no doubt in their addled minds that she meant business.

Within five minutes, both men were brought to their hut, stumbling and weaving unsteadily. Again, they were left alone, but now even more women were guarding the hut. Clearly they expected an escape attempt, and they were not about to let the men go without a fight.

Doru soon joined them and attempted to reason with Logan, but Logan was in no mood to be reasonable.

"Surely you have others back home, why can you not leave these here with us?"

"Doru, I know this may be difficult for you to understand, but that's not the way we do things where we're from. There are many men, on many worlds who would gladly step in and...well...they'd be happy to join your tribe. Willingly join your tribe. I have already told you about Sheppard's condition, and you can see that he's getting worse. I must take him back, but I will not leave the others here to be held prisoner."

"Colonel Devane, you do not understand how...difficult...it has been."

"Look, I get that you're lonely. I do, believe me. But this is not the way to get what you want. We CAN help you, but not if you insist on holding these men prisoner."

"Even if I aquiesced, the others would still not allow you to take the men."

Logan's eyes grew cold and steely. "Then you'd better make them understand that I WILL take them with me, by whatever means necessary."

"Logan..." Daniel warned.

"No!"

"What if *I* stayed behind? As insurance that we are still willing to help?" he offered.

"Unacceptable." Logan remained firm.

"You can't take them all on at once," he argued.

One eyebrow shot up and her eyes took on an even colder glint. "Watch me," she hissed.

"Doru, talk to your people. I have no desire to hurt any of them, and I do understand your...need. But I will fight for my people, and you won't like it. I'd rather handle this peacefully, so convince them to let us go, ALL of us, or I will be forced to act. And I promise you... If anything happens to Colonel Sheppard, I will show no mercy!"

Doru looked into her eyes and saw the truth there. She meant it. "I will...try..." she excused herself to go speak with the others.

Mitchell shook his head and suppressed a smile.

"What?" Logan snapped.

"Nothing...just..." he shook his head. God, the woman was hot. Seriously hot.

"Bates, Lorne!" she snapped. The two men lurched unsteadily to their feet.

"Snap to, gentlemen! You be ready to act when I give the order. Zats only, I don't want to kill anyone..." she paused and looked down at Sheppard. "Yet!"

She looked over at Mitchell, still seated on the ground. "Colonel Mitchell?"

His head bobbed up. "Hmmm?"

"Are you with me?" she asked.

"Yeah, sure..." he, too, lurched unsteadily to his feet.

It was clear from the increasing volume outside that the other women were resisting, just as Doru had said they would. She'd known that anyway, which was why she didn't wait for their answer.

"Logan?" Sheppard rasped.

She knelt at his side and softly stroked his face. He was burning up now. She could tell the pain was getting worse, just by looking into his eyes.

"It's okay John, we're gonna get you out of here," she whispered.

"There's too many of them," he protested.

"John, I don't care how many there are. I'm taking you home. If that means I have to shoot every last one of them, then that's what I'll do!"

She turned to Daniel then. "You know what he's going through, are you going to help me?"

"You know I will."

"Help me get him on his feet."

Mitchell pulled her aside. "I'll help him," he said.

Between the two of them, they managed to get Sheppard on his feet, while Logan, Bates and Lorne discussed strategy. Nothing fancy. Just a straightforward-shoot-anything-that-moves type of plan, and run for the gate.

On a three count, the six of them made their move, taking the women outside completely by surprise. Logan fought her way fiercely, zatting every woman who tried to stand in her way. She was like a woman possessed, leaving it almost unnecessary for Bates or Lorne to fire a shot. Within minutes, the group had made their way to the gate, which was now guarded by over twenty women. Logan, in no mood for further discussion, did not even warn them away before firing. She'd taken down fifteen of them before the remaining guards finally fled.

"Dial the gate!" she shouted at Lorne.

The women who'd fled were now returning with others to continue the fight, but they were too late. As soon as the wormhole stabilized, Logan sent her code and then ordered everybody through. She stayed back long enough to make sure they'd all gotten through, then followed behind them. Daniel had already called for a medical team when Logan burst through the gate.

"Raise the shield!" she bellowed. The shield immediately activated and then the wormhole disengaged.

Logan went to Sheppard's side as they loaded him onto a gurney and began hurrying them toward the hall leading to the infirmary. Beckett already had a surgical team standing by and ready to perform the appendectomy, pending the results of his test results, but he was reasonably sure of Logan's initial diagnosis. Once it had been confirmed that it was, indeed, appendicitis, Sheppard was rushed right in to surgery. Logan wanted to accompany him, but Beckett was having none of it and ordered her to wait outside.

Caldwell and Weir were standing over near the beds assigned to Daniel, Mitchell, Bates and Lorne, all of whom were arguing and complaining about being confined to bed in the first place.

"Shut it, all of you!" Logan barked at the men. "All four of you were compromised, you know the drill, so shut up, sit back and wait to be cleared!" Logan's eyes flashed angrily, but they all knew there was fear, too, behind the anger.

Not wanting to further risk her ire, all four did as they were told and waited patiently to be cleared for release. Caldwell and Weir exchanged knowing looks, but were happy that they didn't have to physically tie the men down.

An excruciating two hours later, Beckett emerged from the operating room, grim-faced and ashen. Logan was instantly terrified.

"Carson...What...?"

He looked at her, concern and compassion in his eyes.

"Sit down, love..." he pointed to a nearby chair.

Her eyes grew round and shadowed. "No..." she shook her head negatively.

"He's still with us, Logan," he tried to reassure her.

"But?"

"His appendix ruptured," he paused as she gasped. "We got the bugger out and cleaned up as best we possibly could. Look, love, I'm not going to lie to you. John is stable now, but you know as well as I do that the risk of infection is extremely high."

All she could do was nod.

"Now, I've got him on high dose intravenous antibiotics. He's strong, and you know he's a fighter. We're doing everything we can for him, but the rest is going to be up to him."

"He'll make it..." she murmured.

"As soon as they've got him settled, you can go in and sit with him."

Logan nodded, then hugged Beckett fiercely. "Thank you Carson."

Daniel and Caldwell had walked in as Beckett was explaining Sheppard's condition, but hadn't wanted to interrupt. Caldwell whispered something to Daniel that sent him reluctantly out of the room before approaching Logan. He could tell she was on the verge of breaking, but also knew she wouldn't want to give in to the fear.

"Logan," he murmured.

She looked up dazedly into Caldwell's eyes. What he saw there broke his heart. She was afraid. More afraid than he'd ever seen her. Her fragile hold on her emotions was rapidly diminishing, so he just held out his arms and she faltered. With a gut wrenching sob, she launched herself into his arms and let him sweep her off her feet and into a private room. There he found a chair and sat down, cradling her in his arms. All the fear and frustration that had been mounting came out in great heaving sobs. Her worst fear ever was [thisclose] to fruition, and it was the one thing that could destroy her completely.

With the release of all that pent up emotion, Logan was able to find the strength to pull herself together and put on a brave face for Sheppard. After washing her face, she turned to Caldwell for appraisal.

"Better," he smiled reassuringly.

She planted a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you, Steve...For letting me vent." she whispered.

"Anytime," he grinned.

Logan went out the door and down the hall to the recovery room.


	21. Chapter 21

Sheppard was extremely pale, but his vitals looked good, and his breathing was strong. She shooed the nurse out the door, then took Sheppard's hand in hers and sat on the side of his bed. She kissed his hand before placing it on her lap and then reached out to smooth back the forever uncooperative chocolate brown hair.

"I won't let you leave me, flyboy."

"I'm not going anywhere," he croaked hoarsely without opening his eyes.

"Shhhh, sleep," she cooed.

"Been sleeping," he slurred sleepily.

"You need to sleep some more," she ordered.

"I mean it, you know," he yawned. "I'm not going anywhere," he slurred again.

"Good. I'm going to hold you to that. Now sleep," she ordered, kissing his forehead gently.

A moment later, his breathing told her that he'd drifted back to sleep. He would need it if he was going to have enough strength to fight off any infection resulting from the toxins released when his appendix ruptured. If anyone could fight, it would be John, she consoled herself. Outside the recovery room, Caldwell watched, along with Weir, who'd just returned with Daniel.

"How's he doing?" asked Weir.

"He's stable," Caldwell replied.

"And Logan?" asked Daniel.

"As long as he's stable, she'll be fine," Caldwell shrugged. He knew that Daniel knew how important Sheppard was to her.

"Colonel Caldwell, we have two of our guests isolated, but we haven't found the third yet..." Weir began.

"Which one is missing?" Caldwell asked.

"Seila," Weir replied.

Caldwell looked over at her, mildly alarmed. "The last time I saw her, she was with..."

"We haven't found Lyta yet either, so they might still be together."

"They have my son," his alarm growing.

"The other two women have no idea what happened back on Takada, which means they probably had no plans to do anything untoward here. At least that's what we're hoping. Did you ask Lyta to show Seila around?"

"Yes," his jaw tightened.

"Anywhere in particular?"

"No, I just sort of implied that I wanted her off my back," he growled.

"Okay, then she was probably taking her on an extended tour. I thought about calling to them over the city's communication system, but I didn't want to alert her, just in case."

"No, we shouldn't. But I want them found...now!" his eyes had turned steely and cold. With one final look at Sheppard and Logan, Caldwell turned and strode out of the room, with Weir on his heels.

Daniel watched them go, then refocused his attention on Logan and Sheppard. He knew, as well as Caldwell, just what it would do to Logan if anything happened to Sheppard. He shook his head, sent up a silent prayer and left to go help search for Caldwell's son.

Logan emerged from Sheppard's room some four hours later. Exhausted, but encouraged, she'd let Beckett cajole her into going back to her own quarters long enough to shower and grab a bite to eat. He'd assured her that Sheppard would sleep for the remainder of the night, and that all his tests were very encouraging. As of yet, no infection had settled in and Sheppard was resting comfortably.

As she made her way toward the mess hall, following her shower, Logan noticed that there were a great many people up and about for the lateness of the hour. The entire time she'd been at Sheppard's side, she'd been completely oblivious to everything else going on in the city. She was beginning to feel that cold sense of foreboding wash over her. Something was terribly wrong. She stopped a pair of airmen along the way and asked about the number of people still on duty. What they told her did nothing to assuage the foreboding growing inside her.

She hadn't given the three women who'd come here from Takada a second thought when she'd returned to the city. She'd been so preoccupied with fear and worry over Sheppard. The thought of Samuel Caldwell in danger spurred her into action. Beautiful, sweet little Sammy, the boy she loved and had sworn to keep safe, Shannon's legacy. Her thoughts went to Caldwell, who had been so kind to her earlier when she fell apart. Had he known even then? No, he couldn't have. Her thoughts raced as she ran back to her quarters and grabbed her zat and sidearm then headed to the brig.

Mirin and Pelu stared in fear at the angry woman before them. They'd been told what had happened back on Takada, and they knew that this woman meant business when she'd told them that she would do whatever it took to recover the missing woman and child. They'd had no part in whatever it was Seila was doing, though they had been as desperate and lonely as she. Both had admitted that the sight and proximity of a baby might easily have driven Seila to desperate measures, but neither believed her capable of harming a child. The woman, Lyta, might be another matter, however. If Seila did try to take the child, and Lyta tried to stop her, Seila very well might hurt _her_ , if she hadn't already.

"Where would she go? What would she do?" Logan demanded.

"I don't know," Mirin said.

"We do not know your city. To leave, she would have to return to the gateway." Pelu insisted.

Logan continued to grill them about Seila. About the way her mind worked. When she was satisfied that they'd told her everything they could, she took her leave and went out to search again. She had to be somewhere in the city, Logan thought. She could not fly a jumper, nor were any missing, and she couldn't have gotten past the guards posted around the gateroom. And she couldn't remain in one place very long, since every inch of the city was systematically being searched. She would have to keep moving to avoid detection... Then it hit her. The one place no one had bothered checking, since he wasn't there...

Logan opened the door to Sheppard's quarters and cautiously stepped in. The room was dark, but she could sense that she wasn't alone. Letting her eyes adjust to the darkness, she waited for a moment before going any further. Within moments, she'd located the still form of Lyta, sprawled face down on the floor. Logan checked for a pulse and breathed a sigh of relief when Lyta groaned. She was alive, but she had a nasty gash on the side of her head, and bruises up and down her arms.

Logan tried to rouse her without hurting her further. "Lyta! Wake up, it's Logan," she prodded.

"The baby," she groaned.

"Where is he?"

"The woman...Seila...She took him...I tried to stop her, but..." she began crying.

"Do you know where she might have gone?"

"No...I must find him..." Lyta tried to sit up, but was overcome with dizziness and fell back down again.

Logan keyed her mic and called for a medical team to come to Sheppard's quarters. "I'll find him, Lyta, I swear!" she promised before running out of the room.

Twenty minutes later, the sound of Sammy's cries alerted her to his location. She rounded the corner in time to see Seila step out of the transporter, carrying the fussing infant in her arms. Logan yelled at her to stop, but the crazed woman continued to run down the hall. Logan smiled, knowing that Seila was entering a passage that dead-ended. There would be no where for her to run now. Logan had her cornered. She keyed her mic and radioed her location to Caldwell, knowing he would have thirty men down there within minutes.

"There's no way out, Seila." Logan called to her.

"I won't give him back!" she screamed.

"The child does not belong to you," Logan tried to remain calm so that Seila wouldn't freak out and hurt the baby.

"You can have others...I...need... _him_..."

Logan stopped about seven feet in front of her. "I understand how difficult it must be for you, but this is not the way."

"You know nothing!"

"I know you're not getting out of here with that baby!"

Samuel was squirming like mad, his chubby little arms outstretched for his Godmother. It was clear from the expression on his face that he didn't understand why she didn't immediately sweep him into her arms and cover his face with kisses, as she had always done whenever she saw him. Caldwell charged down the hall, with about ten people behind him, and skidded to a halt when he saw Logan pointing her zat at Seila. Samuel saw his father and began kicking wildly and whimpering.

"Colonel, please...lower your weapon," whispered.

"Just waiting for you, sir," she said and immediately holstered the zat.

"Please, Seila, give me back my son," he said.

"No!"

"This isn't necessary," his tone was soft but stern.

"You don't understand what it's like...You don't know..." she cried.

"We can help you."

"You would come with me?" she asked tearfully.

"NO!" replied Logan, Bates and Lorne in unison.

"Then I will take the boy!"

"No...Let him go, and I will come with you," Caldwell said.

Logan looked up at him in surprise. "That's... unacceptable, sir."

"I have to do this..." he told her.

"You and the boy," insisted Seila.

"Seila, think about what you're doing. Do you really want to hurt that baby?" Logan asked.

"No...But I need them...I can't be alone anymore..."

"You don't have to be. We've told you and your people, we can help you, there are lots of men on many worlds...They would be happy to...help...your people."

"I want _this_ man." her eyes took on a proprietary gleam. "And _this_ child."

Logan looked up at Caldwell again, then got an idea. "These are spoken for," she smiled.

"You lie! His wife, the child's mother, is dead!"

"Indeed she is," Logan took a deep breath and tried not to flinch at her reference to Shannon. "But now they belong to another."

Caldwell and his men looked at her questioningly. Only Bates seemed to understand where she was going.

"I don't believe you," Seila snapped.

"Haven't you wondered why the child reaches for me, even now?" Logan turned slightly and winked up at Caldwell.

"I have claim to the child, and to his father. I will not let you try and usurp my place." she warned Seila.

A few of the others were beginning to catch on to her plan now.

"You have a chance to leave this place, to start a new life with any number of men in this galaxy, but you cannot have this one!" she put her arm around Caldwell's waist to further illustrate her point.

"You lie!" she was becoming more and more agitated.

Logan wanted to push her into focusing on Caldwell instead of the baby. With an apologetic look at Caldwell, she reached up and pulled his face down to hers and plastered a searing kiss on his lips. Several of the men murmured and smiled, and even wished they could trade places with Caldwell, knowing full well that it was all for show - part of her plan to get the baby away from the crazed woman, but not caring.

Seila did exactly what Logan was hoping for. She came after her, loosening her hold on Samuel and allowing one of the men to snatch the baby from her arms as she lunged for Logan. She pulled away from a shaken Caldwell in time to grab the hand that raised up and tried to plunge a knife into her. The two women tumbled over, falling to the floor and began fighting for control of the knife. Seila was so crazed by this time that she began striking out at Logan's face with her free hand, in order to loosen her grip on the knife they were fighting over. None of the men dared to intervene, lest they inadvertantly distract Logan and end up getting her injured. Despite her craze-induced strength, Logan managed to get the upper hand, knock the knife completely out of Seila's hand and send it skidding down the hall. Then, with two solid punches to the face, Logan knocked the rest of the fight out of her before Bates and Lorne pulled her away.

Two others took hold of Seila, cuffing her arms behind her back. She continued to scream and rant at Logan, who in an uncharacteristic show of bitchiness, walked back over to Caldwell, took Samuel in her arms and planted another searing kiss on Caldwell just to stick it to Seila.

They could still hear her screaming and cursing as she was led down the hall and down the stairs toward the detention area.

Logan accompanied Caldwell back to his quarters, where Beckett did a quick exam to confirm Logan's assessment of Samuel's condition. The baby was a little tired and overstimulated, but he was unharmed. Lyta was in the infirmary, recovering from a severe blow to the head, and Torus was safely esconced and snoring in the extra room in Caldwell's quarters, blissfully ignorant of all that had taken place.

"You took an awful risk, you know?"

She shrugged, "I honestly didn't believe that she would hurt him."

"I know she wouldn't. But you...? She definitely would have hurt you."

"With all you big strong men standing so close by to save little ol' me?" she fluttered her eyelashes at him.

Caldwell chuckled in spite of everything. "And now, you have to endure the non-stop ribbing you're going to be getting from everyone about your...uh...tactics."

She shrugged again. "Meh! They knew what I was doing."

"You think that's going to stop them?"

"Probably not," she took the baby from him and held him closely against her for a moment. "It was worth it, sir."

"Thank you," he took her face in his hands, gently rubbing his thumb across her cheek. "Thank you," he repeated and gently kissed her forehead.

She smiled sleepily up at him, then kissed the baby and handed him back. "I better get going, I want to be there if John wakes up."

"Tell him I'll see him tomorrow."

She wasn't sure how she made it back to the infirmary. She sure didn't remember walking there, but now that she was there, something had instantly set her back up. She paused in the hallway, then froze in place. "Logan!" She could hear Sheppard's voice in her head just as clearly as if he'd been standing next to her. She ran to Sheppard's room and what she saw there made her blood run cold. She was immediately transported into the nightmare she'd been having for months. Sheppard was laying in bed, but there was a steadily growing light surrounding him as he lay there.

"NOOOOO!" she screamed.

Logan knew it was pointless to pull her weapon, but she aimed it at the intruder anyway. "Get away from him!" she shouted.

"I am not here to harm him."

"I said get away from him!" Logan growled menacingly.

"He suffers needlessly."

"He's getting better," she countered. "At least he will if you stay away from him."

"I can help him."

"I thought you weren't allowed to help us lowly mortals," Logan snarked.

Athar gazed evenly at her. "Not in normal affairs, but I can guide him through his ascension."

"He's not dying!" she screamed.

"You would rather he suffer?"

"He was recovering... He didn't even develop an infection..."

"You do not know what I know."

"I know he wouldn't want this!" she shouted.

"You are wrong," Athar spoke so calmly that it was infuriating her.

"I don't care what you think you shared with him, I know him better than you, and I know he wouldn't want this. He would never choose to stand idly by while millions of lives were wiped out by the Wraith, or anything else. Now back off!"

In the back of her mind, she had to wonder why no one else had come running at the sound of her yelling and screaming.

"I can help him in ways you cannot."

"No!" She knew that Athar could wipe her from existence with a single thought, but she wouldn't let that stop her.

"Move away!" she shouted again.

Athar would not budge. Logan nudged closer to Sheppard and as she reached out to touch his hand, Athar finally flinched.

"You must not touch him!" she gasped.

Logan sensed an edge. "Why? Because it will stop whatever it is you're doing to him? Will it wake him up?"

Athar stared unblinking. "It will harm him."

"I don't believe you. Why do you think I came running in here? _He_ called me!" She reached out and touched his face and the light growing around him immediately dimmed. Logan smiled as Sheppard moved his head from side to side. He was struggling to wake up.

"You are hurting him!" Athar cried.

"I would never hurt him. And if you're so sure of yourself, let him wake up and tell me that he chooses to ascend."

"You musn't do this," Athar insisted.

"John," called Logan. "Wake up sleepyhead."

Sheppard began tossing and turning before finally opening his eyes. " Logan... What's going... _Athar_?" he looked groggily over at her.

"Listen to me, John..." she began.

"No! She's trying to get you to ascend!" Logan snapped, cutting the Ancient off.

"Ascend? What?" he was dazed and confused and the pain medication was beginning to wear off.

"She thinks you'd rather go off with her than stay here and fight."

"What?! I'm not...Hey! My gut may feel like it's on fire but I'm not dying!" he growled.

"You are wrong," Athar countered.

"No he's not! Don't you think he would KNOW?!"

"Come with me, John. I can show you wonders you have never dreamed of."

The light began to grow around her and waft toward Sheppard again. His eyelids grew heavy again and he began to feel like he was floating, not an all-together bad feeling. Then Logan stepped into his line of sight again and the pain started to return.

"John, please...You PROMISED!"

His eyes snapped open fully. "I'm not going anywhere." he murmured weakly.

"I can take you where there is no pain... You do not want this anymore."

"John!" Logan cried, burying her face in his chest.

"I want...I want..."

"You want the pain to stop."

"No..." he shook his head, reaching up to stroke Logan's hair.

"You want the light..."

"No... Logan..." her head snapped up at the sound of her name on his lips. "I...want...to stay...with Logan..." he murmured. "I'm. not. going. anywhere."

Logan turned to stare victoriously at Athar. "You heard him."

"He does not know what he is saying."

"Logan..." he gasped.

"Leave this place now!" Logan ordered. "Or I will find a way to MAKE you leave for good."

"John is the only one who can truly send me away, and he will not do that."

"Get out!" Sheppard barked.

"You do not mean that."

"Yes...I...do! Go back to your...people...You are not wanted here. I wouldn't go anywhere with you, even if I were dying!" Sheppard struggled to get the words out, clenching his teeth through the pain.

"Get out!" Logan shouted at her.

The light grew brighter and brighter until they couldn't see anymore. Logan threw herself over Sheppard until the light reached a pinnacle and then disappeared.

Daring to open one eye, Logan looked around to make sure Athar had really gone, then turned to look down at Sheppard. His face was ashen and perspiring.

"Lo, honey, do you think you could get off my incision?" he gasped.

She grinned, kissed him on the cheek and hopped off the bed. A moment later Beckett and several of the nurses came running into the room.

"What happened?" demanded Beckett.

Logan winked at Sheppard then turned to Beckett. "Just a battle over his soul," she quipped.

"What?" he stood there staring at them.

"Listen Carson, I think you need to check him over again, he seems to have a fever." Courtesy of Athar, no doubt. "And he needs more pain meds."

"I'm not going anywhere," Sheppard reminded her.

Logan smiled and let Carson examine Sheppard and begin a new course of antibiotics. This time, Beckett could not convince her to leave Sheppard's side, and knowing better than to fight her on the matter, he allowed her to stay.

It took Sheppard a few days to fight off the infection that had set in. Logan remained by his side the entire time, save for the occasional break to shower, change and eat. It never ceased to astound Beckett how easily she could shift from warrior to caretaker in the blink of an eye. Two very distinct "jobs" that were normally in direct conflict with one another, yet she managed to pull it off, and admirably so. There had been a parade of visitors and well-wishers stopping by to pay their respects to Sheppard, or to try and lure Logan out of the infirmary for a short break. While she'd spoken at length to Daniel Jackson, she preferred to focus her attention on Sheppard, almost as though she were _willing_ the infection to leave his body.

Daniel had been shocked to hear about Athar's recent antics, and marveled that the "Others" had not tried to stop her. What she'd done, in trying to maneuver, or force, Sheppard to ascend was in direct violation of the Ascended's highest mandate. Oma Desala had been punished for merely assisting those who WERE dying to ascend, but she'd never actually tried to force anyone to do so. He was certain that it must be a lonely and horrible existence for Athar to "live," but SHE, at least, had made the choice to risk such punishment in the first place. He knew Sheppard well enough to know that he would never choose to exist as an ascended being, unable to step in and help humans whenever and wherever he could. He also knew that Sheppard was not READY to give up on life just yet.

He didn't know how to comfort or assure her that Athar would not try again, he hoped she wouldn't, but he couldn't be certain. He didn't think the "Others" would let her get away with it, but he couldn't say at what point they would step in; before or after she'd succeeded in taking Sheppard's mortal life. Still, if his life was any indication, and if Athar did succeed in taking Sheppard's mortality, he could always choose to take human form again, as he himself had done. Scant comfort, Logan had said, but it was something.

Once Sheppard began to get his strength back, it was near impossible to contain him in the infirmary. So, with Logan's promise to look after him, Beckett agreed to release him into her care. To that end, she practically moved into his quarters with him, so she could make sure that he wasn't overdoing it. She knew he was REALLY feeling better when she returned one afternoon, after allowing Lorne and Bates to visit alone with him, to find him scowling and glowering at her, while a sheepish Lorne and Bates beat a hasty retreat.

"What the hell were you _thinking_?!" he bellowed.

"I was thinking I needed to get the baby away from her!" she replied, trying to keep a lid on her temper.

"So you bait her….by KISSING YOUR SUPERIOR OFFICER IN FRONT OF A DOZEN MEN?!" he squawked.

"It worked…. and they knew I was just goading her! Hell, if Caldwell had been a woman, one of them would have done the same thing…."

"If Caldwell had been a woman, then she wouldn't have WANTED her, now would she?!" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"You know what I mean."

"Yes I do. But that still doesn't mean you can put your own life in danger by baiting a psychopath….." he shook his head at her.

"John, it's _over_. Everything turned out alright. Sammy is fine, I'm fine, Caldwell is fine."

"And that's supposed to make me feel better?" he gawked at her.

"I should think so….. Aren't you happy that we're all fine?" she fluttered her eyelashes at him.

Sheppard rolled his eyes in complete exasperation. "Yes, of course I'm happy that you're all fine. But….." he paused in mid-sentence.

"But, what?"

"You're not still…..carrying a torch for the guy, are you?" he asked.

"What?!"

"You heard me…. Those guys don't know but I do, and those kisses they described, in excruciating detail by the way, sure sounded…..real….." he told her.

"Well, they weren't. Look John, I was angry….and scared….I saw the desperation in her eyes, and I even understood how lonely she must be, but she hurt people I care about…. She tried to steal the baby I….. _SHANNON'S_ baby. I couldn't let her…. And I couldn't let her take Caldwell back to her world either, you know what they would have done to him!"

"I know…."

"I had to get the baby away from her, and I knew the only way to take her focus off Sammy was to goad her….. Of course the second kiss was just to piss her off," she grinned sheepishly.

"Yeah, well, she must have really pissed you off, for you to resort to something so…."

"Bitchy?" she finished for him.

"Okay…" he trailed off and studied her face for a moment. "I am glad you're okay."

"So am I…. about you," she smiled up at him.

"No more stunts like that though, okay?" he took her face in his hands and made her look into his eyes.

"No promises," she said stubbornly before kissing his nose and pushing him back down on the bed. "Now _you_ should be resting."


	22. Chapter 22

Two weeks later, Sheppard walked into his quarters, following his checkup, to find Logan dancing around on his balcony with baby Sam in her arms. She was singing along with a recording of the song, "My Guy" to the baby, and having a wonderful time doing it. Sheppard stood behind the curtains, not wanting to interrupt, and just watched them. For his part, Samuel was laughing and cooing and eating up all the attention. Sheppard, utterly charmed, felt an odd stirring in his gut as he watched them.

Logan had always had a great singing voice, that was no surprise. Maybe it was just the way she looked, dancing around with the baby in her arms. She looked so happy, free and utterly at peace. It made him smile, right down deep in his soul.

As the song wound down, he stepped out from behind the curtain and applauded. Logan spun around, blushing in surprise. Samuel was ecstatic to see one of his very favorite playmates and began kicking his feet and holding his chubby arms outstretched for Sheppard to take him.

"Easy there, Hoss!" he chided the exuberant child. "Mind if I cut in?"

"Yayayayayaya" the baby gurgled happily.

"Thank you," he grinned and wrapped his free arm around Logan waist, pulling her close to the two of them.

Logan easily fell into step with Sheppard as he moved to the slower song. She laid her face against his chest, wrapping one arm around him and the other around the baby. Sam nestled happily between them and enjoyed their closeness, the movement and the music. Neither of them spoke, not wanting to break the spell of a perfect moment in time. Three songs later, Sam began to get a little restless and started squirming. Sheppard reluctantly pulled back and looked down at her face, just as she turned her face up at him. Their eyes met and locked and something unspoken passed between them. Unspoken and profound. The moment passed when Sam let out a squeal at the sight of some birds on the horizon.

"Noisy little bugger, isn't he?" Sheppard quipped.

"He can be," she smiled. "He's….getting tired. I better take him back to Lyta."

Sheppard released her, then planted a kiss on the boy's forehead, ruffled his hair and handed him over to Logan. She gave his hand a squeeze then turned to go. Sheppard watched her walk away, his heart turning over as Sammy gave him a last wave.

Samuel Caldwell's first birthday brought mixed emotions for Logan. The death of her friend still weighed heavily on her, though it did not bring the debilitating pain it had before. She could remember Shannon now with smiles and laughter, rather than tears and pain. She still missed her, but she was so grateful for the part of her friend that still lived on in her son.

The others, knowing how deeply she'd grieved for her friend, were a bit wary about making too big a deal out of the birthday celebration, but Logan had thrown herself into preparations for the event with all the joy and enthusiasm the occasion called for.

That morning, she'd risen early and went to the chapel they'd dedicated in Shannon's honor and said a brief prayer for her. She also reiterated her promise to always look after the boy. Sensing she was not alone, she turned and found Sheppard standing in the back of the chapel. She smiled warmly, stood up and walked back to him.

"You okay?"

She nodded. "Yeah….I am."

He reached out and gently stroked her cheek. "Good. She'd want you to be happy."

"I know."

The door behind them opened and Caldwell entered. "Good morning," he stammered.

"Morning sir," they said in unison.

"We were just leaving," Logan told him.

"You don't have to," he assured them.

"I had my private time with her, sir….. You should have yours."

They bid him goodbye, then went their separate ways. Logan went to the kitchen to start baking the birthday cake, and Sheppard was off to the mainland to gather wood for the barbeque they were having that evening.

On her way to the kitchen, Logan ran into Doctor Heightmeyer, who was still "treating" the Takadan woman, Seila.

"I don't suppose you would agree to meet with her?" Heightmeyer asked.

"What for?" Logan asked curiously.

"It might help her get past some of the resentment she feels."

"Toward me?"

"She's having a difficult time letting go of the notion that you somehow stole her man."

"That's your area of expertise, isn't it doctor?"

"It is, which is why I'm suggesting it. She needs to understand that there isn't some grand conspiracy to keep her from finding a mate and having a family…."

"No offense, doc, but….Isn't she just….well….horny?"

Heightmeyer laughed. "To put it mildly, sure, but it goes deeper than that."

"I am the one who MADE her believe that Colonel Caldwell and I were….I did purposely antagonize her, doc. Why would you want her to see me, of all people?"

"I'd like you to explain to her why you did what you did."

"How is that going to help? I should think that would only feed her….. insecurities."

"Think about it, will you?"

Logan shrugged. "Sure, doc. I'll let you know."

Logan was seated between Hammond and O'Neill, bouncing Samuel on her lap while keeping a close eye on Sheppard's proximity to the grill they had set up on the pier. What was it about men and fire? They were roasting meat, not building a freakin' signal fire! Sheppard had been wanting to instruct Sammy on the finer points of barbeque, but she wouldn't allow him to take the baby anywhere near the bonfire they were stoking.

For a change, everything seemed to be cooperating long enough for the Lanteans to relax and celebrate. O'Neill's visit only added to the festive mood as he laughed and joked with the Athosian children who'd been invited, along with their parents, to the celebration. O'Neill had pulled her aside earlier for a little heart-to-heart, initially prompting fears that he was about to recall her to Earth.

"Relax, will ya? Or Sheppard'll zoom over here and start finishing your sentences for you!"

She smiled with both relief and amusement. "Yes sir."

"I just wanted to tell you, I was reading your reports...about the Athar incident?" she stiffened at his mention of the name. "I gotta tell you, I agree with you."

She stared up at him in puzzlement. "About what, sir?"

"What you didn't say in your report. You know, a between the lines kinda thing. I don't trust them any more than you do."

"Ah...Because of Daniel?"

"There's that, yeah...Plus the whole 'we're so much better than you' attitude while they're so busy NOT helping us lesser creatures, blah, blah, blah."

Her eyes turned flared angrily for a moment. "Yeah."

"Easy there Sparky!" he chuckled.

Logan looked at him in surprise. He'd never used her nickname before. Of course no one but Sheppard had ever called her that. No one else had DARED to.

"Just wanted you to know where I stand, and to let you know you aren't alone in your feelings."

"Thank you, sir."

Mitchell approached her once the dancing started, much to Sheppard's annoyance. It wasn't that he didn't like the guy. They'd actually become fast friends who had a lot in common. Mitchell could have been his brother and he STILL wouldn't want him sniffing around Logan. They shared a couple of dances before Mitchell led her to a quiet corner to talk.

"You've been avoiding me lately," he said.

"No I haven't...Not intentionally," she countered.

"I was watching you earlier...With the baby and the Athosians. You look...happy."

She smiled. "What's not to be happy about?"

"Good point. I just...you know...in civvies..."

"What?" she laughed. "You didn't recognize me?"

He shook his head and chuckled. "No, I did...I just wanted to tell you...You look incredibly beautiful."

Logan blushed furiously. "Thank you."

"Are you ever going to give me a chance?" he asked.

"A chance? What do you..."

"You're not making this any easier on me."

"I'm just...not...sure what you mean, Cam."

"You must know by now that I'm crazy about you."

Her eyes widened and her blush took on a deeper hue of red. "Oh," was all she could say.

"Come on Logan, you know we have fun together, we have a lot in common, I think I have a lot to offer you, I KNOW you have a lot to offer me...And, did I mention that I'm crazy about you?"

"Wow...You really know how to leave a girl speechless..."

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Sheppard eyeing them disapprovingly from across the pier. She was half-tempted to kiss Mitchell just out of spite, but she couldn't do that to Mitchell. She WOULDN'T do that to him. She was still watching Sheppard watching her, when Kerin, a young Athosian woman approached him. She was very pretty, and normally very shy, but she didn't appear to be feeling shy right now. She took Sheppard by the arm and led him to the dance floor, where he awkwardly took her in his arms and began dancing with her. Logan felt a momentary pang of...she didn't know what...but it certainly wasn't pleasant.

"Logan?"

Her attention snapped back to Mitchell. "I'm sorry, what?"

"It's not going to work, is it?" he asked sadly.

"I...don't...know...Cam... I don't see how it can."

He took her hands in his and looked into her eyes. "You don't even want to try?"

Her eyes grew clouded. "Don't you think that would just make things harder?"

"Well, I was hoping to convince you that we really could make it, once you gave us a chance."

"I'm sorry..."

He shrugged, trying desperately to take the rejection in stride. "It's okay... Can't blame a guy for trying."

She reached up and stroked his cheek. "I wish I could...you know...let go, but..."

He took her hand and kissed it softly. "I understand."

"You know I think the world of you, don't you?"

"That's good to know."

"I'm sorry it can't be more."

"It's alright, Logan, really."

Mitchell kissed her once on the forehead and excused himself to go back to the party. Logan was scanning the dance floor for Sheppard when she heard a voice behind her.

"You shot him down."

"Daniel!" she jumped.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't eavesdropping, I swear."

"Then what makes you think I shot him down?"

"I recognize the look."

"What?"

"It's the same look I carried around after we split up."

"Come on, Daniel..."

"I'm not blind, Logan. He never said anything, but do you think I don't recognize the signs, or didn't see the way he looked at you? I'm not criticizing, mind you, I know EXACTLY what he sees in you."

"And you think I'm being unnecessarily cruel?"

"No! God, no, sweetie. I know where you're coming from, probably better than anyone. I understand."

"I see."

"I'm just saying, is all."

"Uh-huh..."

"Come...dance with me!" he took her arm and led her out to the dance floor.

Midway through the evening, O'Neill pulled Sheppard aside, asking to speak with him privately. On their way inside, O'Neill also collared Logan, requesting that she join them. Exchanging wary glances, they followed O'Neill to the conference room.

"For cryin' out loud! Will you two relax? I told you, I'm not gonna send you back to Earth!" he barked.

"Yes sir," they replied in unison.

"Here we go..." he muttered. "Are you sure you two weren't separated at birth?"

When they laughed, O'Neill turned to look at them quizzically. "Not the first time someone's asked, right?"

"Right!" they chimed together.

O'Neill rolled his eyes and kept moving. When they entered the room, both Logan and Sheppard stopped in their tracks and stared in shock at the surprise O'Neill had arranged. Logan was first to react. She let out a squeal of delight and hurled herself across the room and into the outstretched arms of the man standing there, as O'Neill quietly backed out of the room again. After she'd hugged and kissed him, she turned back to look at Sheppard, who was still standing there mute.

"John..." the man said.

"Uh...Dad..." was all Sheppard could manage.

"It's good to see you, son."

"Uh, you too, sir." he stammered.

Logan released her hold on the elder Sheppard, so he could cross the room to where his son stood, stock still. Sheppard wasn't quite sure whether to salute or offer his hand for a handshake, but his father took the initiative and wrapped his arms around him in a giant bear hug. Taken quite by surprise, Sheppard froze for a moment before embracing his father back. Logan watched as several emotions swept over his face, one after the other.

She'd told him of his father's change of heart when she first arrived in Atlantis, but it was one thing to HEAR it, another thing entirely to SEE it for himself. Tears streamed down her face as the two men clung to one another. The love was still there, had always been there, in fact, underneath the anger, resentment and disappointment. All of that faded away as they stood there together. Emotions got the better of her, too, and she soon burrowed in between them to join in on their reunion.

"You two look good," he told them.

"You, too!" they replied in unison.

"And we're still doing the... _thing_...I see!" he laughed.

It had been a running joke the whole time they were growing up together.

"Yes, sir," they did it again.

"Well...It's nice to see some things never change."

"So, Dad, how were you able to get clearance to come visit us?"

Tom Sheppard winked at Logan before answering his son. "I do still have some connections, you know?"

"I'm...uh...painfully aware of that, sir." Sheppard quipped.

"How much have they told you?" Logan asked.

"I'm guessing that they've only given me the basics. I was hoping you two could fill in the rest."

"Happy to!" Logan chirped.

"I'm real proud of you, you know that? BOTH of you."

Sheppard eyed his father skeptically. "Thanks, Dad."

"I mean it, son. I was proud of you before, but I was too bull-headed to let it show. Thought I'd be giving you the wrong impression if I told you what I really thought about that stunt you pulled in Afghanistan."

"Logan mentioned something to that effect when she got here," he admitted.

"Speaking of which..." he turned to Logan. "You must have been beside yourself when she turned up on your doorstep."

Sheppard's face lit up at the memory. "There are no words."

A sudden squawking just outside the door caught their attention and all three turned to see Caldwell enter with his son squealing for his Godparents.

"I'm sorry to interrupt," Caldwell apologized. "He saw you through the window and I couldn't keep him distracted."

"No problem, sir!" Logan and Sheppard chimed together.

Sheppard popped out of his chair and walked over to Caldwell, taking the wiggly boy from him. "Sir, I'd like you to meet my father, Colonel Tom Sheppard, Dad, this is our C.O. Colonel Steven Caldwell."

"It's a pleasure, sir." Caldwell shook hands with him while Logan went to oogle over Sammy with Sheppard.

"Hope my son hasn't given you too much difficulty, Colonel Caldwell."

"He keeps things interesting, that's for sure. But, he's invaluable to us."

"Good to know. Who's the cadet?" he asked, pointing to Sam.

"Oh, that's my son, Samuel. Have they told you yet...That they're his Godparents?" Caldwell asked, turning to look over at the three of them lost in their own little world.

Because none of them were looking at him, they were completely oblivious to the look of astonishment in his eyes, or the slow, crooked smile that crept across his face as he studied his son with Logan and the baby.

"Is that so?" he grinned.

"Yeah, sorry, Dad. Say hi to Sammy, my future wingman," he grinned as he plopped the boy atop his shoulders and walked back over to stand next to his father.

"Your son is one of his favorite playmates," Caldwell told him.

"I can imagine," the elder Sheppard chuckled.

"And he's famous for getting young Samuel all riled up just when he's supposed to be getting ready for bed," Logan chided him as she reached up to pull Sam off his shoulders.

"Well, now that he's had a chance to see you, I'll get him out of here so you guys can visit in peace."

Tom Sheppard stood back and smiled happily as Logan and Sheppard smooched and cuddled the child before giving him back to his father. Of all the things he'd imagined he would find here, THIS was certainly not one of them. They talked for half an hour more before rejoining the party. Tom wanted to meet their friends and colleagues and see a bit more of the city before they turned in for the night.

Almost no one NEEDED to be told that the older man with Sheppard and Logan was Sheppard's father. The resemblance was unmistakeable. They were the same height, the same build, and they both had the same cocky half-smile that lit up their green eyes. There was a time when Tom's hair was just as unruly as John's, though he preferred to keep it closely cropped to avoid the snide remarks. His once chocolate brown hair was now silvered with grey, making it more salt and pepper, but he was still fit for a man in his early sixties.

It was clear to everyone that Tom Sheppard adored Logan, treating her more like a daughter than friend to his son. Also clear was that the feeling was mutual. Tom shooed the two of them off to dance and have fun while he spoke with Weir and Hammond, but he watched the two of them dance. Together, with other people... It soon became obvious to him that each one always knew what the other was doing and where they were. He also noticed, much to his delight, that Logan looked slightly annoyed when a young, blonde Athosian woman proprietarily dragged John to the dance floor. He was simultaneously pleased and surprised when John appeared to be uncomfortable with the young woman's obvious affection. It wasn't like his son to shy away from the attentions of a beautiful woman, nor had there been any shortage of them since John first hit puberty. He took this as a sign that his suspicions were right on target. Logan, too, had a great many admirers, watching her from afar. He recognized Dr. Jackson from Logan's memorial service and made a point of saying hello to him.

Logan was dancing with Bates when she caught Sheppard's silent appeal for help across the dance floor. She smiled and whispered something to Bates, who looked over his shoulder and smirked at Sheppard. They soon danced over to where the young woman had a viselike grip on Sheppard. Bates tapped Sheppard on the shoulder and cleared his throat.

"Mind if I cut in?" he asked.

"Oh...very well," he smiled down at Kerin, who only reluctantly released her grip on him.

Bates took Kerin in his arms and began dancing her away as Sheppard gratefully wrapped his arm around Logan.

"Thank you," he said emphatically.

"That kind of attention never used to bother you, flyboy," she teased.

"Funny!" he quipped and then spun her around the dance flor in the opposite direction from Bates and Kerin.

The music slowed down even further and Logan wearily rested her head against Sheppard's chest.

"Tired?"

"Um-hmm," she murmured. "In a good way."

"You want to pack it in?"

"Not yet. Besides, we did promise to show your Dad a little more of the city before we call it a night."

"True..." he looked around trying to locate his father. "Looks like Caldwell is getting ready to hit the rack, I guess that means we can excuse ourselves as well."

Logan looked over at Caldwell and nodded. "N-kay," she yawned.

The two of them made their way over to Caldwell and Sam, who was valiantly trying to stay awake. Logan picked him up, nuzzling his cheek softly with her own before kissing him goodnight. Sheppard bent down to kiss him goodnight and then stepped back so Caldwell could take the baby from Logan. Tom watched them together for a time before going over to join them.

"I believe you promised me a tour?" he hinted.

"Yes sir," they replied in unison.

He smiled as his son led the way back inside to begin the tour.

SEVERAL DAYS LATER

Tom Sheppard couldn't remember having so much fun since...well...he didn't know when. First Sheppard had taken him up in one of the jumpers, surprising the hell out of him when he was actually able to pilot the damn thing! It appeared that Sheppard had inherited his Ancient genes from his father's side, just as he'd inherited almost every other trait from him. Then they'd gone surfing on the mainland. At sixty-one, Tom Sheppard still enjoyed catching a wave every now and then, but surfing with his son again, after all these years? He was a happy man. Logan had been unable to join them, as she was on an off-world mission today.

It still boggled his mind, what these kids did every day. He'd been proud of John before, but he was near to bursting now. And Logan? After everything she'd been through, she still had the guts to do what she did. As much as he worried about them, he was sure he'd done the right thing allowing John to attend the Academy, and convincing Logan's father to allow her to attend as well. He knew Devane would be proud of his little girl if he could see her now. She'd found a way to make her father AND herself happy at the same time. She was doing what she loved, and using the medical skils she'd been taught. An odd melding, to be sure, but she made it work. John had matured into a true leader, as Tom had always known he would.

The distinctive sound of a puddle jumper overhead caught his attention. He laughed as the pilot, who surely HAD to be Logan buzzed John as he was riding a wave toward shore. He wiped out, resurfaced and waved at the jumper as it set down near his. Tom watched as John met Logan on the shore and took her board from her before leaning down to give her a peck on the cheek and a smart swat on the rear for making him wipe out. They were laughing good naturedly when they paddled out to meet him.

"Nice of you to join us," Tom called.

"Sorry I'm late, sir!" she smiled.

"This one's mine!" Tom called and began paddling ahead of the incoming swell.

"Good mission?" Sheppard asked.

"Uneventful," she smiled.

"Good for us!" he grinned.

Sheppard was finding it hard not to notice the way her wet bathing suit clung to the curves of her body. Her long hair was pulled back into a ponytail, which pointed enticingly down to the small of her back. He shook his head in an effort to stave off that line of thought. Similarly, Logan found herself drawn to the hard lines of his body, water dripping slowly down the muscular chest to the hard abs. It was no wonder so many women had fallen so hard for him. She reached out and touched the scar below his waist.

"How's it feeling?" she asked.

"Not a twinge," he replied.

They sat there, for a moment, on their boards, bobbing idly in the water. It was there again. That something that had passed between them before. Before either of them had a chance to analyze it, a strong swell rose up behind them and knocked them into the water.


	23. Chapter 23

"And you still don't know who it was that attacked you?" Tom asked incredulously.

"Nope. We never found the wreckage, or even my jumper for that matter. We were so far off course trying to evade whoever it was, and then when we went down... The storm didn't help either."

Tom pulled her close and hugged her tightly. "I'm sorry about your friend, but I'm so glad you're still here. Is that why you're so attached to the little guy?"

"Partly. Even so, he's a great little guy in his own right."

"He's certainly a happy boy."

"He gets a lot of love and attention here."

"So I've seen. You're very good with him," he complimented her.

"Thanks. He makes it easy though."

"I always knew you'd be a terrific mom one day," he smiled.

"Whoa, sir! Let's not go _that_ far!" she laughed.

"One day..." he paused, growing serious. "Tell me...How is John doing...REALLY?"

Logan beamed. "He's doing great...REALLY. Everyone really looks up to him. You know he was the ranking military leader here for a long time, before help arrived from Earth. He took care of all these people and saved so many others. He's...everything you raised him to be, sir, and everything you could have hoped for him to be."

"But is he _happy_?"

"Very."

"And you?"

"Me too. Very happy, I promise you."

"Good. I thought so, but I had to make sure. Your parents would be very proud of you, you know?" he told her.

"I hope so. I'm not sure my father would have understood, but I'm glad you do."

"Eh...Your father was a bit old fashioned when it came to you, but he could be reasoned with."

"By YOU, maybe. If you hadn't stepped in when you did, he never would have let me go to the Academy."

"Probably not," he agreed. "But you would have joined up at eighteen anyway."

"As an enlisted person. I wouldn't have had the advantages that the Academy gave me, or had my best friend by my side. We have you to thank for that."

"Logan, honey...Don't you know...Didn't John ever tell you that he refused to go to the Academy unless YOU could go, too?"

Logan looked up at him, somewhat surprised. "Oh, he told me he wouldn't...I didn't think he was serious! And I never would have let him get away with that."

"Believe me, honey, he WAS serious. He adamantly refused to go without you. He knew it was your dream."

"Is that why you stepped in?"

"No. It was an added bonus, but I already believed that your father was wrong to try and keep you from going. I still believe that."

Logan hugged him again. "Thank you."

"Any time, darlin, any time."

They were interrupted by a call over the city's intercom. "Colonel Devane to the control room please!"

Logan keyed her mic, "Control this is Devane, what's going on?"

"We received a communication from the mainland, Colonel. They're asking for you."

"I'll be right there." She turned apologetically to Tom. "Duty calls..."

"Mind if I tag along?"

"Not at all," she grinned and linked her arm through his for the hike back.

When they arrived in the control room, they saw Caldwell and Weir worriedly pacing back and forth in his office.

"What's up?" Logan asked.

"That communication we got from the mainland...It was Halling. He said he found..."

"Better if you listen to it yourself," Caldwell cut Weir off.

Logan listened incredulously as Halling described meeting up with a man, while on a hunting trip on the far side of the mainland. A man who was not Athosian or Lantean. In fact, he would not reveal his lineage, but Halling suspected he was Menarean for some reason. He was living in the wilderness, in the wreckage of an aircraft Halling didn't recognize.

Like Caldwell, she was instantly taken back to that day, a year before when she and Shannon were shot down by an unknown assailant. Was it possible? She knew she'd managed to blow whoever it was out of the sky before her jumper had gone down, but...Was it possible their attacker had not only survived, but managed to live alone in the wilderness all this time?

TEN MINUTES LATER. CALDWELL'S OFFICE.

"No."

Logan stared up at him incredulously. "But sir..."

"I'm sorry Logan, but the answer is no."

"Forgive me, sir, but WHY? I would have thought you'd want to be the first one out there."

"I do. But you and I are the LAST two people that should go."

Logan blinked, open mouthed. "Beg pardon?"

"Everyone here lost out when Shannon died, especially you, me and Sammy. More than anything I'd like to go out there and beat the truth out of this guy, whoever he is; and I know you want to as well. And THAT is exactly why WE can't go."

"You're afraid we might kill him before he can tell us anything useful?"

He reached out and took her face in his hands. "Aren't you?"

Logan looked up into his eyes and then leaned forward to bury her face against his chest. "Yes."

"We'll get our chance to talk to him when they bring him back," he assured her.

Logan watched as Bates, Stackhouse, Klein and George boarded a jumper and took off for the mainland. Halling had been warned of their pending arrival, and to not let the man know they were coming for him. But what they didn't know, was that the stranger had heard everything they'd said to Halling. He'd been eavesdropping on the radio conversation, instinctively knowing that the Athosians would notify the Lanteans about his presence there.

By the time Bates and his team arrived, the man was no where to be found.

Caldwell was barely containing his anger as he paced back and forth across his office.

"Did he hurt anyone?"

"No sir," Bates replied.

"Doesn't mean he won't. I'm sending a few more teams out there to help with the search and to protect the village. If he thinks Halling betrayed him, he might come looking for some payback."

"We'll wait here til the others arrive then," Bates assured him.

Logan was seething, too. "Now can we go?"

"No...Especially not now," he said adamantly, though it was clear that he'd like nothing better than to get his hands on the guy.

"He's right, Colonel," Tom said. Calling her by her rank was a gentle reminder that she had to set aside her personal feelings and think like an officer.

"Yes, sir."

Caldwell studied her face for a moment. "You CAN make sure the RIGHT teams go. Get them organized and out of here on the double."

"On my way, sir," she said and strode out the door.

"She's a damned fine soldier, that one," Tom announced proudly.

"Yes sir, she certainly is. We're very lucky to have her...And your son..."

The alarm went off followed by the standard announcement:

"We have off-world activation."

"And speaking of which, that should be your son now."

Tom smiled. "You're planning on telling him he CAN'T join the search either, right?"

"You are correct," Caldwell smiled.

"No telling what he'd do to the guy if he had him in his sight."

Caldwell chuckled dryly. "Oh, I know EXACTLY what he'd do, which is why HE can't go anymore than we can...The bond between Logan and John is well known around here, sir."

"And not frowned upon?" he asked somewhat skeptical.

"Actually, no...It's not. They are unquestionably devoted to one another, but they've always been consummate professionals. I haven't had any problems with their friendship getting in the way of their duties here."

Tom smiled again. "Good to know. I'd hate to think about what separating them again might do to them."

30 MINUTES LATER

Sheppard was angrily pacing back and forth in his quarters. He understood why Caldwell had forbidden himself, Logan and Sheppard from going to the mainland, but he didn't like it. Yes, he wanted to choke the life out of the guy for what he'd done the previous year...IF he was the one who'd shot down Logan's jumper.

Tom watched his son for a while then decided to call him on something he'd noticed since he first arrived. "Son, does she know?"

Sheppard stopped dead in his tracks and looked quizzically at his father. "Does who know what?"

"Logan. Does she know how you feel about her?" he watched his son's face closely.

"Of course she does, Dad...Why would you...You were there the whole time we were growing up, come on."

"Yes I was. And I always thought of her as the daughter I never had. I just didn't know, until I came here, how very right I was to feel that way."

Sheppard looked blankly at his fathers face. "What the hell are you talking about, sir?"

"When did it happen? When you found out she was still alive?" he prodded.

"What?"

"You haven't even admitted it to yourself, have you, son?"

"If you tell me what the hell you're talking about, I might," he shrugged.

"Okay, I'll spell it out for you..."

"Please do, sir, cause I'm a little slow..." Sheppard snarked.

Tom chuckled. "You have always loved her."

"Yes...?"

"Now things are... _different_."

"Different?" he gaped at his father.

"Don't be obtuse, boy! I've seen the two of you together," Tom exclaimed, exasperated.

"So? You've seen us together since birth!" Sheppard reminded him.

"Not like _this_."

"Like what?"

"Not... _in_ love..."

Sheppard took a step back, his eyes wide and put his hands in the air. "Whoa, Dad... Have you been drinking?!"

Tom shook his head and grumbled under his breath. "No, but maybe I _should_ be..."

ATLANTIS GYM

Logan was beating the stuffing out of a heavy bag in the gym when Caldwell walked in. He watched her for a while before making his presence known.

"You're gonna hurt yourself like that," he teased.

Logan turned and glared at him. "Yeah? Care to show me how it's done?"

Caldwell grinned and walked over to where she was standing. "Wouldn't want to shame you or anything."

For that, he earned a swift punch in the gut, but he was ready for it. "You hit like a girl," he taunted.

"You're TRYING to set me off, aren't you?" she huffed at him.

"Maybe."

"Why?"

He studied her for a moment, appraising her mood. "Maybe I'm just bored. I could use a good laugh," His eyes twinkled with mirth.

"Oh...okay...Bring it, soldier man!" she motioned him forward.

"Aren't you afraid you might break a nail?"

She swung without warning, but he knew it was coming and deftly dodged her swing. For the next twenty minutes they sparred, each taunting and teasing the other. Finally, in frustration at not being able to get the upper hand, she feinted, grabbed his arm, and then deftly flipped him over her shoulder.

"Not an easy thing to do with boxing gloves on," he commented as he lay on his back on the floor, staring up at her.

"It's a gift," she smiled.

"Feel better?" he asked breathlessly.

"No...But I'm too tired now to stew about it."

"Good," he smirked.

"Which is exactly what you were going for."

He smiled up at her. "Worked for me, too."

"You just gonna lay there all night?"

"I'm thinking about it."

"Where's Sammy?"

"He's...uh...actually...with Sheppard."

"Trying to wear _him_ out, too?"

"Yup!"

"Where's Lyta?"

"Torus has a fever, so she's tending to him...Didn't want Sammy to get sick, too."

"Maybe I should go rescue John..." she began stripping off her gloves.

"Piece of advice?"

She looked down at him. "Mmmm?"

"Shower first," he grinned, waving a hand across his face.

"Nice," she said and then stepped on his stomach rather than stepping over him.

After taking his advice to shower, Logan made her way to Sheppard's quarters. As soon as she walked into the room, she saw them, both fast-asleep on his bed, Sammy cradled protectively in the crook of Sheppard's arm. They looked so peaceful laying there like that. And very sweet. Logan stood there for a few moments just looking at the two of them. She felt something stir inside her as she watched them. It almost brought tears to her eyes.

She tiptoed over and kissed Sammy gently on the head, then moved around to the other side of the bed and crawled in beside Sheppard. Closing her eyes, she burrowed in closer to his side and let his warmth wash over her as she slipped into a deep, peaceful sleep.

Neither of them woke when Tom came in to check on his son. He watched the three of them for a few moments, happiness welling up inside him at the picture they presented like that. He'd always subscribed to the theory that discretion was the better part of valor, so he gently retrieved the sleeping Samuel from Sheppard's embrace to take him back to his father, lest Caldwell walk in on the scene he'd just walked in on. Covering them with a blanket, he quietly stole out of the room with a satisfied smile on his face.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"It's a WHAT?" Caldwell barked.

Bates hesitated a moment before responding. "It looks like an X-303, sir."

Caldwell turned to look at Sheppard and Logan. "We did lose a few in the battle when we first arrived..."

"Is it still intact?" Sheppard asked.

"No sir, not really. There are a couple of gaping holes in one side... Looks like the guy's been using it for a shelter."

"Secure it, Bates. We'll send someone out to pick it up."

"Yes, sir."

Caldwell turned back to face Logan and Sheppard. "Don't ask!" he ordered.

"No sir," they replied together.

"Could it have been an X-303 that shot you down?" Caldwell asks.

Logan shrugged. "I suppose. I couldn't really get a good look at it. You think maybe it crash landed on the mainland still intact?"

"It's possible. If there wasn't too much damage, and this guy had some piloting knowledge..." Sheppard trailed off. "Nah! How would a Menarean be able to fly an aircraft like that? They don't even have any ships of their own."

"We've been out of contact with them since they helped the Genii to infiltrate this base. We can't be sure the Genii didn't help them develop the technology." Caldwell pointed out.

"True."

"I'm going to have to send in a few more teams to help flush the guy out...NOT you two!" Caldwell informed them.

"He's been out there a long time, sir, he knows the mainland better than we do by now."

"Yes, but we didn't know he was out there before. We'll find him."

They watched Caldwell stride purposefully out of the room.

"How are _you_ doing?" Sheppard asked her.

"I'm okay," she shrugged.

" _Okay_?" he prodded.

"How am I _supposed_ to feel? All this time, we've been wondering who did this and now we might actually get some answers..."

"But it doesn't bring her back."

"No. Nothing will, but... Maybe...it will give us some..."

"Justice?"

"Maybe. I want to know WHY he attacked us."

"So do I, Sparks. And then I'd like just five minutes alone with him."

"Take a number, flyboy..." she murmured, an icy resolve in her eyes.

"He said his name was Kordu and that he had been a prisoner on board a Wraith ship. He was somehow able to escape using the Wraith transporter as it flew over the mainland," Halling explained.

"Did he say how long he's been out there?" Sheppard asked.

"He did not. But it must have been a very long time."

"I'll say...The last large scale attack here was...years ago."

"So, he could have been out there before I came here?" Logan asked.

"What about that one hive ship that came about a year and a half ago? If he were on board one of those darts..." Caldwell shrugged.

"It's possible. Since they couldn't get to Atlantis through the shield they might have gone looking for humans on the mainland."

"Halling," Logan began. "What makes you think he's Menarean?"

"He seemed somewhat familiar to me, though I'm sure I never met him. He reminded me greatly of someone I saw when we were evacuated to Menara during the great storms."

"But he didn't SAY he was from there?"

"He did not. He said very little, in fact."

"Thank you Halling. We greatly appreciate your help."

Halling excused himself, leaving Logan, Sheppard, Caldwell and Weir alone to ponder what little they knew so far. They had a name, and a possible place of origin. The ship he'd been using for shelter had indeed been a downed X-303 from the Daedalus. Tests confirmed that blast residue on the ship had come from jumper fire, which could only mean that Logan had been the one to shoot it down the year before. That still left lots of unanswered questions.

On the mainland, Kordu had managed to stay one step ahead of his pursuers. He'd been fortunate enough to overhear the tall one, Halling, when he called the city to tell them about him. It had given him time to escape, though he never should have allowed Halling to see him in the first place. Hunger had gotten the better of him, as hunting and fishing had been scarce for a while, and they'd offered him food and shelter. He should have been stronger.

The one potentially good thing to come of this was that now he may finally get a chance to strike down the man he'd hated for so long. The enemy who'd been ultimately responsible for the demise of his homeworld: Major John Sheppard! Though he hadn't shown himself yet, there was no doubt in Kordu's mind that Sheppard would eventually be sent to track him down, and when he did... Kordu would avenge his people.

His plan was ruined, however, by his own careless daydreaming. He'd been so busy plotting and planning Sheppard's demise he had failed to notice that the tree branch he'd concealed himself on was weak. Too late he felt the branch begin to dip and then buckle. Kordu crashed to the ground, the noise giving away his location. The impact had temporarily knocked the wind out of him, preventing him from escaping and allowing the twelve nearby Lanteans to surround him.

Bates called for restraints and took it upon himself to bind the man's hands behind his back before roughly pulling him to his feet. "You must be Kordu," Bates grinned menacingly.

"I will speak to only one man," Kordu growled.

"And who might that be?"

"The man called Sheppard. Major John Sheppard."

"You're a little out of the loop, friend. He's been promoted to Colonel, but he's dying to talk to YOU," Bates shoved him forward into the custody of Lorne and George. "Get him back to the jumper!"

Bates allowed them to move ahead of him while he keyed his mic. "Colonel Caldwell, this is Bates."

Caldwell was just walking back into his office, where Logan and Sheppard waited. "Go ahead Bates."

"We have him, sir," Bates happily informed him.

"Good work!" Caldwell grinned.

"Thank you, sir. We're on our way back to the jumper, we should be arriving in the city within the hour."

"We'll be ready."

"Bates? Has he said anything?" Sheppard asked.

"Oh yes, sir. In fact he says YOU are the only one he'll speak with."

The three of them exchanged curious glances. "He called me by name?"

"He called you MAJOR Sheppard, but, yeah...He specifically asked for you."

"Tell him I'll be waiting for him..." Sheppard had that cold, steely glare in his eyes that always spelled trouble for an enemy.

Caldwell slowly paced around the cell containing Kordu. Silent, brooding, deceptively stoic. He waited for the man to speak first, though it took the better part of an hour before he finally broke.

"You are not the one called Sheppard."

"No, I'm not."

"I will speak only with Sheppard."

"Not if I don't let him in here, you won't," Caldwell growled.

"You are?"

"His commanding officer."

"You are the head of this world?"

"Of this city, yes."

"Then you are the one who gave him the order to abandon my people?" he hissed.

"We don't generally abandon people, as a rule. Where are you from?"

"Menara."

"I see...Well, that was a little before my time, but I have to tell you, I agree completely with Sheppard's decision to cut off all contact with your people, after what they did to OUR people."

"We did nothing to your people except offer trade and shelter!" Kordu was outraged.

"No? Is that what your leaders told you?" Caldwell arched an eyebrow at him.

"It is the _truth_! And you repaid our kindness by severing all ties!"

"Well, well, it appears that your leaders failed to mention the part about them conspiring against my people with our enemy, the Genii. About how they betrayed OUR trust and allowed the Genii to gain access to this city and kill several of our people in the process, not to mention the theft of supplies and attempted kidnapping of two people."

"You speak lies!" Kordu shouted. "Where is Sheppard?"

Just then, Logan entered, carrying Samuel in her arms. She was dressed in civilian clothes and her long, silken hair flowed freely down her back. Even Caldwell was momentarily taken aback by her appearance. She looked incredibly beautiful, which was obviously the point. Heightmeyer had been discussing with them the best way to keep the prisoner off balance, and this was sure to do it. Judging by the way Kordu was gaping at her, Caldwell would be willing to bet that he'd never encountered anyone like Logan before.

"Tell me, Kordu," she said calmly. "Why should we give you what you want?"

The man stared at her, unable to speak for a few moments.

"If you refuse to cooperate with us, why should we do so with you?"

"Sheppard...is...he knows what it is I would speak of."

"*I* know what it is you seek," she purred.

Kordu gulped. "You do...?"

"Indeed... You seek vengeance, retribution. I understand these things," she nodded slowly.

"But, you are such a _gentle_ creature..." He was completely taken in by the spell she was weaving.

"Am I? Aren't you aware that appearances can be deceiving?" she asked, her eyes straying to a silent Caldwell.

"I am..."

Logan hitched Sam higher up on her hip. "Will you tell _me_ the truth?"

"The truth about what?" he asked, gawking openly at her.

"The ship you were using for shelter, on the mainland. Were you able to fly it?"

Kordu smiled, eager to boast of his accomplishment to her. "Yes."

"I see. That IS quite an accomplishment, especially for one who has never done it before."

"I mastered it over time," he admitted.

"Uh-huh...And were you the one who used it to attack one of the Lantean ships a year ago?"

"I do not know how long ago it was, I...lost track of the days over my time on the mainland, but yes, I was able to damage one of the Lantean ships," he boasted.

"I see. That is also quite an accomplishment. Will you tell me why you attacked that ship?"

"You said you understood why...retribution...for my people."

"Oh...Did you KNOW who was flying that ship, Kordu?"

"No. I hoped it would be Sheppard, but it did not matter. They were Lantean, the enemy of my people."

Logan turned slightly so that he could get a good look at the child she bounced on her hip. "Do you see this child?"

"He is as comely as his...mother?" he asked, somewhat disappointed that she might have a child.

"Actually, yes, he is. His mother was a very lovely woman," she agreed.

"You are not...?"

Logan shook her head negatively. "No, I'm sorry to say. This boy was born the day you shot down that ship..."

Kordu stared at her blankly.

"His mother was ON that ship, Kordu. A lovely, innocent woman, who was looking forward to sharing her life with this child."

"A...a...woman?" his eyes widened in horror.

Logan nodded. "Yes, a woman. A doctor. She brought the child into the world just as she was leaving it."

"What are you saying?" he was beginning to look sick.

"She gave birth to her son with her last dying breath, Kordu."

"No..." he gasped.

"Yes. And I should know, because *I* was there, too."

Now he really looked ill. "You?" he gasped.

"Yes, me... I was the pilot flying that ship, Kordu. I was the one who helped her bring this child into the world. The one who watched her die, because of your actions. She was my friend..."

Logan struggled to keep a tight reign on her anger and maintain her hold over the man. Sam, sensing her inner turmoil began to fuss and cry. She handed him over to Caldwell, who was clenching his jaw so tightly, she was sure he would break a tooth.

"That woman, Kordu, was wife to this man here," she pointed up at Caldwell.

Kordu looked over at Caldwell for a split second, unable to face him for longer.

"Neither one of them were here when the incident happened between your people and mine. In fact, *I* was not here then, either. But we are the ones who paid the price for your vengeance. The loss of a friend, a wife, a mother...Was it _worth_ it?"

"It was not you that I wished to hurt," he admitted.

"Perhaps not, but you already said you didn't care. It didn't matter *who* you blew out of the sky that day, as long as they were Lantean."

"No...only warriors were able to fly the ships..."

"That's not entirely true, however...I suppose I must tell you this: *I* am one of these warriors you speak of."

He stared open-mouthed at her in disbelief. "No...You are..."

"A warrior," came a male voice from around the corner. "And a damned good one, too!"

Sheppard stepped around the corner and into the light.


	24. Chapter 24

A hiss of recognition escaped from Kordu's lips when he focused on Sheppard.

"I believe you've been asking for me?"

"Sheppard!" Kordu's voice fairly dripped with hatred.

"Don't believe I've ever had the privilege...HAVE we met?"

"I know everything there is to know about you."

"Really? I don't think *I* even know everything there is to know about me..." he moved over and put an arm around Logan's waist. "What do you think, honey?"

Kordu's eyes widened in anger as Logan stared adoringly up at Sheppard and returned his embrace.

"There IS so much to learn. But Kordu here believes he is quite accomplished at many things."

"Well, let's see, cowardice and murder..." Sheppard trailed off as Caldwell stepped in.

"Don't forget, ladies man. I think our friend here actually thought he might have a chance at wooing the good Colonel here," he laughed.

Sheppard laughed, and then Logan joined in, much to the chagrin of their prisoner.

"You do not know what this man is capable of," he said to Logan, earning him another round of raucous laughter.

"You are QUITE mistaken about that, Kordu," she laughed. "I have known this man for my entire life."

"Which you, incidentally, tried to cut short, so you and I are already off to a REALLY bad start."

"This man fills your head with lies!" he cried. "He betrayed my people and left them to the mercy of the Wraith!"

"You really need to check your facts, Kordu. It was your people who betrayed mine. They sold us out to an enemy who cares nothing about others, not even YOUR people. They helped them gain access to this city so they could steal technology and kill without provocation. YOUR leaders, Kordu. We offered our trust AND our protection, but THEY turned to the Genii instead. And let me guess, those same Genii were nowhere to be found when your people needed help in return for their allegiance."

"The Genii were destroyed in the cullings, just like my people."

"Wrong again! A few of them were taken in the culling, but on the whole, they're all very much alive and well and up to no good!"

"You lie!"

"No, I don't. I have no reason to. My people could have gone back and obliterated yours for what you did to us, but we chose NOT to. We also chose NOT to associate people who would betray our trust to the cost of innocent lives!" Sheppard was working his way up to a healthy rage now.

Kordu looked at Logan, his eyes softening every time he glanced at her. "Is this what you believe?"

She nodded. "It's what I KNOW."

"No, no, no, no, nooooo," Sheppard pulled her back from the cell. "I don't think I want someone like you even talking to her..." he winked at Logan as he led her toward the door.

Caldwell, knowing instinctively where Sheppard was going with this, was already ahead of them and out the door. Logan had definitely achieved the desired effect on the prisoner, and was enjoying his discomfort immensely. Kordu stood there, stewing angrily, jealously even, when Sheppard took her in his arms and pulled her close.

Rather than simply giving her a hug, he tipped her face up to his and kissed her, deeply and passionately. She knew it was just for show, but Logan felt an electric shock surge through her when Sheppards' mouth came down on hers. She clung tightly to him as he prolonged the kiss for maximum effect, and wasn't quite herself when he finally released her. Kordu was red-faced with anger and envy, but she didn't even notice. Sheppard felt equally as shaken when he reached out and softly stroked her cheek, trying desperately to catch his breath before turning back to the prisoner.

A WEEK LATER

In the week since his capture, Kordu had taken to sullen silences, refusing to answer any questions. Logan was the only exception. It seemed that Dr. Heightmeyer's suggestion had worked a little too well. He was completely smitten with Logan.

Although a small part of her felt somewhat sympathetic towards him, for believing the lies his leaders fed his people about the Lanteans, she knew she would never forgive him for the role he played in Shannon's death. She tolerated him now because she wanted answers, and because it was her duty. Logan had never been one to use her looks to get what she wanted, but she didn't mind using them now.

Sheppard, however, was becoming increasingly uncomfortable with the feelings Kordu had developed for her. He didn't see any likelihood in Kordu escaping and coming after her, but it made him uneasy anyway. Caldwell was similarly uncomfortable with those tactics, but he hadn't been able to argue that she hadn't yielded the answers they'd been looking for.

Because of her, they were able to ascertain that Kordu had, indeed been a prisoner on the hive ship they'd destroyed a year and half earlier. He'd miraculously been able to escape before being cocooned, and when he learned that they were hovering in orbit above Atlantis, he stowed away on one of the darts and used the transporter to beam himself down to the mainland. He hadn't realized, at the time, that Atlantis was so far from the mainland, so he'd essentially stranded himself there.

He was lucky enough to stumble across the beat up X-303 in his explorations of the mainland and over time, he was able to get it powered up and working. He'd explained that the pilot and co-pilot had been long dead by the time he found the ship, though he would have gladly killed them to get his hands on the aircraft. Once he learned how to first hover and then fly the ship, he waited for his opportunity to strike.

He showed only the merest fraction of remorse over the death of Shannon Caldwell, but he was immensely apologetic to Logan for nearly killing her as well. He went out of his way to assure her that he would never have hurt her, had he known...And that he would never hurt her in the future. In a momentary loss of control, Logan had snapped angrily at him that the only future he would see would be from the inside of the cell he now occupied.

The rest of the time, he was constantly grilling her about Sheppard, though the only answers she would give him were ones that fueled the envy within him. He already resented Sheppard, but even moreso now. The thought of him touching her, kissing her...It filled him with rage.

After one particularly infuriating encounter with him, Sheppard took Logan for a walk on the pier, ostensibly to let her cool off in peace, but in reality, it was to give the others a chance to prepare a surprise for her. After their walk, he suggested they stop by the mess hall for a bowl of ice cream, to which she readily agreed. When they arrived there, though, the place was dark and seemingly empty.

"That's weird," she murmured.

Suddenly the lights went on and people jumped out from everywhere around her yelling: "Surprise!"

Taken completely aback, she glanced over at Sheppard, who was grinning madly. Her birthday had passed quietly by, the previous year, due to her deeply depressed state over Shannon's death. She'd somehow expected this year to be the same.

"Wow!" she laughed. "This is great!"

It looked like everyone in the city was there, including SG-1 and General Hammond, who had come in from Genoa while Sheppard had her distracted. She pulled Sheppard aside for a moment before joining the throng of well-wishers.

"Now I feel really bad. All we did for your birthday was enchilada's and beer on your balcony!"

Sheppard hugged her close. "That's because you KNOW that's what I like...You, on the other hand, love a good party so..." He spread his arms out, "Voila! Happy Birthday Sparky!" He kissed her on the forehead and led her out to greet her guests.

ONE MONTH LATER

P2K-690 held some promise. It was here that the Lanteans had offered the women of Takada a chance to start over with some volunteers from other planets who were looking for a new world to call home. In addition to the progress on building the new village, there were signs of new life burgeoning within the village itself. Several of the women were already pregnant, and those who weren't yet probably would be soon. All of the women had found mates and were happily building lives together in anticipation of the new life they would bring into this world.

It was a shame that Seila hadn't been able to work through her problems, so that she could be part of the new world. Loneliness had taken an unfortunate toll on her, and Dr. Heightmeyer was afraid she might not ever recover. She still asked for Caldwell on a daily basis, and cursed Logan's name. It was a sad situation, but they all agreed that Seila was too dangerous to be set free.

Sheppard returned to Atlantis to report the happy tidings from the planet, only to find his city in chaos. Alarms were blaring all over the place.

"What happened?" he asked Weir, who greeted him at the gate.

"Kordu and Seila have escaped."

"Both of them? How the hell did that happen?!"

"Dr. Heightmeyer is in the infirmary with a pretty severe head wound. Apparently Seila attacked her, took out her guard and then managed to free Kordu by shooting the three guards down in the brig. They'll make it, they're in surgery right now. This all happened so fast...We haven't been able to pin down their location."

Suddenly Sheppard froze in horror. "Logan! Where's Logan?!" he demanded.

"She's with her team. We've got every available member of the military out there looking for them."

"She CAN'T!" he bellowed.

"What?"

"Elizabeth, BOTH of those people would LOVE to get their hands on her. For different reasons, of course, but neither option is acceptable."

"Wouldn't you think their first concern would be to find a way out of the city without being captured again?" she asked.

"If they were sane, rational people, yeah, but they're not. You and I both know that Seila has a score to settle with Logan, and Kordu is madly in love with her! Neither one of them would leave here without her!"

"Colonel Devane, come in!" Sheppard ordered over the radio.

"Devane," came the response.

"Colonel, you need to fall back to the control room."

"Did you find them?"

"Negative. Just get back to the control room, but don't come alone!"

Caldwell had been listening and he understood immediately what Sheppard's concerns were. Kicking himself for not thinking of it earlier, he keyed his own mic.

"Do it now, Colonel Devane! That's an order!"

"Yes, sir." Logan turned to her team members and shrugged. "Come on," she muttered sullenly.

No one on her team knew how close they'd come to the trap Kordu and his new ally had set for them. If they'd proceeded down the hall the way they had been, the entire team would have been dropped by several shock grenades, and Logan would have been in the hands of two very unstable individuals.

Sheppard waited until he saw Logan walk into the control room before leaving to join his own team, who'd already joined the search. He gave Logan a quick hug and a peck on the forehead, along with orders to STAY in the control room until he returned, or the escapees had been recaptured. Bates, George and Lorne were ordered to remain with her and guard the control room, but all three understood his unspoken request to protect Logan first.

Sheppard passed several other teams on his way to join his own team, but so far no one had seen any sign of the prisoners. Soon enough, Sheppard found himself in the same hallway Logan and her team had been searching earlier when the hair on the back of his neck began to stand up. He raised his P-90 and keyed his mic.

"Teyla, McKay, Ronon...Anything?"

"Negative," McKay responded.

"What's your location?" Sheppard asked.

"Third level, C-wing," McKay responded again.

"Okay," he turned the corner and opened the first door. "I'm about ten away in..." The sound of him suddenly crying out in pain and shock carried over the radio for a few seconds before his transmission went dead.

"Colonel!" Teyla called out as she, Ronon and McKay broke into a run to backtrack and find him.

Back in the control room, Logan suddenly stopped in her tracks and her blood ran cold. She keyed her mic and called out. "Colonel Sheppard?"

Weir hurried over to where she stood rooted in place.

"Colonel Sheppard, respond!"

Still no response.

"Dammit John! Acknowledge!" she pleaded.

"I'm afraid Colonel Sheppard is unavailable at the moment..."

Kordu. Logan's blood now felt like ice in her veins. "What have you done to him?" she asked through clenched teeth.

"Nothing...yet. Would you care to come down from your tower and take his place?"

Logan bolted from the room before anyone could stop her.

"Logan, no!" Weir called out too late. Lorne and Bates were on her trail, but she hopped into a transporter and was gone before they could catch up to her.

"Just tell me where to go," she said.

"I know your friends can hear me, so I'll just say this: Come back to where you were before you were ordered to the control room."

"My team knows where that is," she warned.

"We'll be gone before they arrive."

"I'm on my way," she assured him. "But you won't like what you get if you've hurt Colonel Sheppard... I promise you."

"Colonel Devane!" Caldwell called out.

Logan turned off her radio before she was forced to disobey a direct order. Lorne and Bates had been listening as well and let Caldwell know exactly where she was headed. Caldwell ordered the other teams to converge on her intended location, heading there himself at a dead run.

When Logan arrived at the room where they were holding Sheppard, she nearly cried out in horror at the sight of Kordu standing over an incapacitated Sheppard. He was laying on the floor, completely still and unable to speak. On the other side of the room, Seila was holding a stunner weapon, smiling victoriously.

"I'm here, now let him go," she seethed.

"I think not, Colonel Devane," Seila said coldly.

"I'm the one you want, not him."

"Very true. But my new friend here will not allow me to hurt you, much less kill you...My only consolation is that I've discovered that it would hurt you MORE, if I were to take out my retribution upon Colonel Sheppard."

"As you might imagine, I do not have a problem with that," Kordu added.

"You said you would never hurt me," she reminded him.

"I never promised the same to Sheppard."

"Hurting him DOES hurt me, and you know it," she hissed.

"On the contrary, I believe that freeing you from him can only benefit you. Now, if you will come with me, please?"

"No."

"I can make you," he warned.

"You can try, but the only way I go with you willingly is if you leave Sheppard unharmed."

"I promised Seila she could do with him whatever she pleased. Now come along."

"No," she stubbornly stood her ground, knowing that her people would be there at any moment.

"Just take her!" Seila snapped.

Logan took a step back and aimed her P-90 at him. Hazarding a glance down at Sheppard watching helplessly from the floor, she released the safety on her weapon.

"Don't make this more difficult than it has to be or I will shoot him myself!"

"Do it and I WILL kill you."

Kordu pointed his gun at Sheppard and Logan shot him without hesitation. Seila cried out as Kordu sank to the floor. Rather than shooting Logan with the stunner, Seila dropped it and lunged maniacally at her, tackling her to the floor before Logan could get off another shot. Her P-90 went skidding aross the floor and out of her reach. The two women struggled for possession of her sidearm until Seila managed to get her hand wrapped around Logan's knife. She pulled it from the sheath, nicking Logan on the arm and leg before Logan grabbed her hand.

Sheppard watched in horror as Seila momentarily wrested the knife from Logan's grasp and raised it overhead to strike. He tried to scream, but couldn't. An instant later, they heard a single gunshot and Seila suddenly went still, then fell forward. Bates was standing in the doorway, his sidearm still pointed at Seila as she fell. Logan looked up, flashing an exhausted but grateful smile at Bates before pushing Seila off of her and crawling over to Sheppard.

She took his head in her hands, laid it gently on her lap, and began stroking his hair. A single tear slid down his cheek as he looked up at her. That had been too close.

SEVERAL HOURS LATER

Sheppard awoke in the infirmary to find Logan sitting by his side. Her head was laying on the bed next to him, with her arm draped over his abdomen. It was late; very late. No one else was around. He'd gotten back the use of his hands and arms, and some of the feeling in his legs. He didn't want to wake her, but he felt the overwhelming urge to run his fingers through her soft, silky hair. He wanted to reassure himself that she really was here, and safe.

Tears threatened, as he choked up remembering how close he'd come to losing her again. Kordu never would have been able to escape the city with her, but he didn't want to think about what he might have done to her before deciding to give up and take both their lives. Seila, on the other hand...He cringed as the image of her about to plunge that knife into Logan's chest flashed before him. If Bates hadn't arrived when he did, Logan would probably be dead. The horror at his inability to help her overwhelmed him and this time, he could not hold back the tears.

Unbeknownst to him, Tom Sheppard was sitting in a corner in the other side of the room. He'd seen his son struggle with the aftermath of what had happened. He knew that his terror had nothing to do with the threat to his own life, but rather the life of the woman sleeping at his side. Knowing how much John would hate it if his father saw him falter, he didn't reveal his presence.

Eventually, the tears subsided. Sheppard took Logan's hand and intertwined his fingers with hers. His other hand resting on her head, he settled back down and drifted off to sleep, confident that she would be there when he woke again.

When Sheppard awoke again early the next morning, it was to find a smiling Logan and his father quietly chatting at his bedside.

"People are trying to sleep here, y'know," he teased.

"Hey son," his father uncharacteristically leaned down and gave his son a peck on the forehead.

"Dad," Sheppard gave his father an awkward half-smile.

"Morning, flyboy."

"Hi gorgeous," he chirped, his heart turning over to see her smiling face.

"How are you feeling?"

"Well..." he sat up slowly. "I'm... _feeling_...again, so that's a good sign.

"Looks like they gave you a full blast with that stunner," Logan said.

"They wouldn't have, if it weren't for the damn shock grenades going off!" he pouted.

Logan's eyes clouded over and Sheppard immediately held out his arms to her. "C'mere," he said.

Logan sat on the bed next to him and wrapped her arms around his waist as he pulled her tightly against him.

"I'm fine," he whispered.

"I know," she murmured.

Emotion overcame Tom at that point. He'd nearly lost the both of them. Moving in behind Logan, he took both of his 'kids' in his arms and hugged them fiercely. "You two are enough to test even the most staid and stoic of men!" he chided.

Sheppard's stomach began growling. He couldn't remember the last time he ate.

"Wow!" Logan laughed, pulling back. "Hungry much?"

"I could eat a little something," he grinned sheepishly.

"I could have one of the..."

"You go, sweetie," Tom ordered. "Go get cleaned up and grab some food."

"But..."

"No arguments now. I'll stay with the boy, he'll be fine."

Sheppard shrugged, knowing better than to argue with his father.

"Go on now," Tom kissed her lightly on the forehead and pulled her to her feet.

"Yes, sir." She looked back at Sheppard. "I'll be right back."

He smiled and waved as she walked out of the room. Once she'd gone, he looked seriously at his father.

"Is she really okay? You know she'd try to hide it from me, but..."

Tom put a hand up. "She's okay, son. She's more worried about YOU."

Sheppard nodded. "How about you, Dad? We give you a few more gray hairs?"

"That you did, boy, that you did," he chuckled.

A nice, hot shower was exactly what Logan needed. That, and a good cry. She'd come so close to losing the most important person in her life. She leaned against the shower wall and slowly slid down to the floor. Letting the water cascade over her, she just sat there, letting the sobs wash over her until she couldn't cry anymore.

After a quick bite in the mess hall, Logan piled a tray with Sheppard's favorite foods and made her way back to the infirmary. Caldwell met her in the hallway, chuckling at the amount of food on the tray.

"He hasn't eaten in a while," she shrugged.

"I see. I checked on him right after you left, he seems to be doing fine..." (eyeing the tray again) "...hunger aside. How are you?"

"I'm fine, sir, just a couple of scratches."

"Good, well...I better let you get going before he starts eating the furniture in the infirmary."

Logan chuckled and continued on her way. She nearly dropped the tray, however, when she entered the room and saw Kerin fawning all over Sheppard and trying to sppon feed him some dish she'd brought with her. Only Tom saw the flash of anger in her eyes before she covered and put on one of the most plastic smiles that he'd ever seen.

"Well..." her voice was high-pitched with repressed anger. "I see you won't be needing any of this," she put the tray down hard on a side table.

"Logan!" Sheppard's smile widened as he tried to look around the obtrusive woman who'd glued herself to his side.

"I...uh...actually...have some...things...I need to be doing. So...I'm gonna go..."

She turned to leave, but Sheppard called out to her. "No, wait!" he called.

"I'll see you later, Colonel," she called over her shoulder and fled from the room.

She could hear Sheppard call her name again, but she kept moving until she hit the south pier. She contemplated diving into the ocean to work off her stress and unexpected anger. WHY was she so _angry_? She knew that Kerin had a crush on Sheppard, but...He looked so happy, sitting there and smiling and letting her feed him like a child, or an invalid. What a crock! And Kerin...the proprietary look she had given Logan when she walked into the room! Who the hell did that little twit think she was? And why the hell was she so pissed off about the scene she'd walked in on? It wasn't as if John hadn't had twelve zillion girlfriends before! It wasn't as if she'd never walked in on a cozy scene between him and one of them before! It wasn't as if... Logan stopped dead in her tracks. She thought back to the previous night; the image of John lying there helplessly while Kordu aimed his gun at John's head... and she came completely undone.

30 MINUTES LATER

She sat on the beach looking disconsolately out to sea. When she'd taken the jumper to come out here, she'd originally intended to do a little surfing to clear her mind, but once she arrived, she no longer felt like surfing. Not that it was a good idea anyway, since she was alone. The image of that gun pointed at Sheppard's head kept playing over and over in her mind. She hadn't felt the least bit guilty about shooting Kordu, nor did she feel bad about Bates killing Seila. However out of character it might be, she was glad that they were gone; that they were no longer a threat.

What she wasn't glad about was the feeling she'd had since walking in on that cozy little scene in the infirmary earlier. Even Tom, a man she considered to be both friend and father-figure, seemed happy with the picture the three of them presented together. A happy little family portrait...

She picked up a handful of sand and hurled it at the water. What the hell was _wrong_ with her?! She turned to look up at the sky as the sound of an approaching jumper drew near. Sheppard! It had to be. Unable to face him just yet, she got to her feet and rushed over to her own jumper as Sheppard set his down on the beach. She had just made it up the ramp when Sheppard came running towards her.

"Logan!" he called out as he ran.

She hit the switch that would raise the ramp and seal her inside. Sheppard stopped in his tracks for a moment, staring in disbelief at the closing ramp. Anger washed over him, too, and he continued on.

"I know how to get in, you know?!" he shouted before hitting the button on his own remote.

The ramp immediately began to open again and Sheppard stomped up and into the jumper, closing the ramp behind him to prevent her from leaving.

"Logan...what the hell?!" he barked.

"Go away, John."

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" he demanded.

"Nothing! I just came here to be alone, so if you don't mind, I'd like to get back to it!"

Sheppard took in the surfboard fastened securely to the wall of the jumper and whirled angrily on her. "You weren't...Logan, you aren't planning on going surfing... alone...are you? You KNOW better than that!"

"Does it look like I'm dressed for surfing?"

"No, but I assume that's what the bag with the towel and suit in it are for."

"John...What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I came to see what was the matter with you. The way you stormed out of the infirmary..."

"I didn't storm out!"

"Yes, you _did_. And look at the way you're acting now! You're pissed as hell at me and I want to know WHY!"

"I left the infirmary earlier because I didn't want to interrupt your cozy little family get-together and I don't KNOW why I'm pissed at you!" she shouted.

"What?!" He was completely lost. "Family get-together?! Are you talking about that woman...Kerin?!"

"Duh..." she mocked.

"Logan...what the hell...?"

Suddenly she burst into tears. Covering her face, she turned away from him. He immediately went to her and took her in his arms. He had no idea where this was coming from, but he knew she was in pain. "I kept flashing back to that image of you...lying there...with Kordu's gun pointed at your head...And I was so...scared...I almost lost you and..."

"Shhhhh, baby...I'm fine..." he cooed.

Anger took over again. She spun around in his arms and pushed him away.

"And then I walk in on that... _woman_...and her homemade... _goodies_...feeding you like...like..." she turned away from him again.

He took her by the shoulders and turned her to face him again. Her face was a mask of conflicting emotions.

"What are you saying?" he asked.

She choked back a sob and looked up at him miserably. What he saw in her eyes was the same thing he saw in his own every time he looked in the mirror. They were, both of them, confused as hell. Completely at a loss to explain or understand what they were feeling or what to do about it.

"I love you."


	25. Chapter 25

Their eyes met as their simultaneous declaration sank in.

"You..." they both began.

"I..."

Sheppard's hands slid upwards, from her shoulders to her face, pulling her face closer to his so she could read everything in his eyes. They stood there for a heartbeat, each reading the truth in one another's eyes. Then his mouth came down on hers in a searing, blindingly passionate kiss. Heat exploded between them and it was as if, suddenly, everything in the universe finally made sense. Each could swear that they felt the gentle brush of the other's mind against their own - a more intimate embrace than anything physical.

In a perfect melding of body, soul and mind, they made love, exploding together in a shattering climax that left both of them shaken, trembling and sobbing. Never before had either of them experienced anything so profound. So perfect. Sheppard held her trembling body close to his as he rolled onto his side, taking her with him as he curled his own trembling form around hers. Neither spoke for long minutes as their breathing slowly began to return to normal. Each let the tears flow freely as they contemplated the new direction their relationship had taken.

"What do we do now?" she asked, after their bodies cooled and their breathing returned to normal.

"About?" he murmured.

"Us. What we've done. How many regs have we violated here? You know it's going to complicate... _everything_."

He shrugged, reaching up to caress her cheek. "It doesn't have to, does it?"

"No?"

"Logan...we were already so close before... everyone knows that. _I_ won't let this change how I behave on the job and I know _you_ won't either. I'm not going to demand that you give up going on missions, although I'd worry a whole lot less if you did, but then I always did."

"Ditto," she chuckled softly.

"No one has to know that anything has changed between us. If we're both willing and able to conduct ourselves the same as we always have, then what we do in the privacy of our own quarters..." Looking around the interior of the jumper, "...or jumpers...is nobody's business but our own."

"Do you really think that no one is going to notice? Especially with that shit-eating smirk on your face?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

" _You_ put that shit-eating smirk on my face, you know, and, if I do say so myself, you're wearing one of your own!" he kissed her soundly, threatening to ignite the heat simmering between them under the surface.

"Do you really think we can pull it off?" she asked when they came up for air.

"Yes, I do. I think we _have to_ unless we want to find ourselves shipped off to different commands, back on Earth, or in forced retirement. I don't see anything wrong with wanting... _us_... and our careers, do you?"

"No... But, you know if push came to shove, I'd resign in a heartbeat rather than give you up."

Sheppard felt his stern warriors heart melt as he looked at her. "I would, too...no question."

TWO WEEKS LATER

"You're what?!" Logan and Sheppard squawked together.

"It's time," Tom repeated.

"Why?" they asked.

"Stop that, you two!" he growled.

"Sorry," they did it again.

"Look, I've been here for two months already, I never planned on staying that long. I wanted to make sure the two of you were alright, and to tell you how proud I am of you...Now I've seen for myself... Look, it's just time for me to go home and let you guys get on with your lives and your work. Now that I know exactly what it is that you're doing..."

"You don't have to go," Sheppard assured him.

"We love having you here," Logan chimed in.

"And I love hearing you say that. But I do have a life of my own, you know, and it's high time I got back to it."

"Dad..."

"No son, no arguments. But there is one thing the two of you can do to make an old man happy."

"Who's the old man?" Logan asked.

"Me! And you know it!"

"You're not an old man!" she countered. "But you know we'd do anything for you."

"Good, good, glad to hear it."

"So what is it, Dad?"

Tom looked the both of them square in the eye, first one, then the other. "You can admit to each other how you really feel."

Logan and Sheppard exchanged glances. "Sir?" they replied in unison.

"You know that has always driven me a little batty," he rolled his eyes at them. "Now, I mean it. You owe it to each other and frankly, you owe it to me too."

"Dad..."

"Now, I don't want to hear about regulations, and I know that's strange coming from an old Colonel like me, but dammit... I love you two, and I want you to be happy. It doesn't have to go any farther than this room, but it needs to be said."

"Dad..."

"Son, I've seen the way you are together and it's a damn sight different than before. Now TELL HER!"

"I already have!" Sheppard finally blurted out.

Tom gaped open-mouthed at his son. "Beg pardon?"

"It's true...Dad..." Logan blushed.

"He told you?"

"And she told me."

A slow, lopsided grin crept across Tom Sheppard's face. "Is that right?"

They nodded together. "Yep!"

"When?"

"Two weeks ago," they replied.

"And?"

"And what, sir?" they asked.

"Good Lord you two are dense sometimes! You love her, she loves you...and?"

They exchanged curious glances and shrugged. "And we're very happy about it," they announced in unison.

"Well that's all well and good, kids, but what are you gonna do about it?" he prodded.

Logan shrugged and looked away.

"What do you expect us to say, Dad? Neither one of us is ready to give up our careers, or to walk away from this place..."

"So you're going to walk away from each other?" he gasped.

"No!" they cried.

"Ahhhh...Okay, so what the brass doesn't know, won't hurt anyone... Think you can keep that up?"

"I don't see why not. We always have before."

"You weren't... _in love_... before..."

"Maybe we were. Maybe we always were. But, in any case, our personal feelings have never interfered with our duties before. Even when we were sent to different duty stations."

"True enough. I guess this means I can't expect grandkids any time soon?" he teased.

"No sir!" Logan blushed.

"It's a little too early for us to even start thinking about... _that_..." Sheppard stammered.

"Fine, fine... As long as you two are happy, that's all I care about."

"We are," they replied in unison.

Early the next morning, the entire senior staff assembled in the control room to bid Colonel Tom Sheppard farewell. Out of respect, all the members of the military stood at attention and saluted as he descended the stairs with Logan and Sheppard on either side of him. He was deeply moved by the show of respect, and struggled to keep a lid on his emotions as he turned back and returned the salute.

"Take care kids," he hugged the two of them one last time. "I love you both very much."

"Love you, too, Dad," they replied, again in unison.

Tom shook his head and walked through the gate. Logan and Sheppard did their level best not to break down as he disappeared into the event horizon. With a quick glance at one another, they turned around and ascended the stairs to begin their busy workday, emotions firmly in check.

LATER THAT DAY

"You found ANOTHER one? Still intact?" Logan gaped at Daniel.

"Intact yes, untouched, no."

"Meaning?" Sheppard prodded.

"Someone beat us to it and they've begun setting up camp, as it were."

"I take it this is someone we know?" Caldwell asked.

"Yep!"

"Anyone we like?" Sheppard asked warily.

"Nope!"

Awwww, crap..." Sheppard muttered.

Logan's eyes widened. "Not the..."

"Genii." Daniel finished for them both.

"How the hell did THEY find it?" Sheppard groused.

"They were in the mood for bragging, but not for sharing," Mitchell said.

"We can't let them have it!" McKay sputtered. "Do you have any idea the damage they could do if they managed to access the ancient database?!"

"Uh, yes, Doctor, I think we do." Caldwell growled.

"The good news, for now, is that the ZPM's appear to be completely depleted and, so far, they don't have an adequate power source to power the city or it's systems." Carter informed them.

"Yet." Sheppard muttered.

"We have to take that city," Caldwell announced.

"Which may not be as easy as it sounds." Daniel began. "Now that they know WE know it's there, and that we want it..."

"They've already called for reinforcements to defend it," Sheppard finished for him.

"Only one way in or out and they have the advantage," Mitchell added.

"One more problem," McKay said. "They need only minimum power to activate the gate's shield. If they can do that, we won't have ANY way to get past it."

"Then we better come up with a plan FAST people. Colonel's, you gather every off-world team we have between Atlantis and Genoa and have them ready to move within the hour. Doctor Zelenka, prep a UAV. If that doesn't get through, no one goes. I'm going to contact General O'Neill and see if he can send us a few teams from Earth. And one other thing... Unless there is _no_ other option, this is NOT shoot-to-kill. We've managed to keep a modicum of peace between ourselves and the Genii for a while now. Taking this city from them will piss them off enough, there's no need to make it worse by killing in order to do so. Zats and stunners only, unless absolutely necessary. Are we clear?"

"Clear, sir!" came the unanimous response.

PS4-887************

Acastus Kolya surveyed the room surrounding the stargate. It was somewhat similar in design to the one in Atlantis. Not as large, but it would suit their purposes, provided they could get the shield to operate. A hundred men now guarded the new Genii city they'd found. Adequate enough to repel a few Lantean teams, should they dare try to take the city from them. And if they could get the shield to work, then no other defense would be necessary. The Lanteans would simply vaporize against the shield the way Sheppard had done to an entire company of Genii soldiers years before. Now he, Kolya, was the one defending home turf against invaders, though he certainly wouldn't mind going up against Sheppard one more time.

Sheppard had bested him twice now. Three times if you counted his brother. He'd warned Jerud about underestimating the Lanteans, but he refused to listen. He'd been as arrogant as Acastus himself the first two times he'd faced off against them. He'd known Jerud would make some kind of attempt, but he did not learn about what he'd done until after the fact. Though he'd been told by one of the survivors of that ill-fated scheme that Sheppard had NOT been the one to take his brothers' life, he had still been present. In fact, his life had been taken by another in order to SAVE Sheppard when Jerud had him in the crosshairs of his weapon. A woman, by the name of Colonel Logan Devane, had fired the fatal shot. The woman kidnapped by his brother to lure Sheppard to his death.

While he could not exactly fault them for defending themselves, he could not entirely absolve them either. Jerud was his brother and he died trying to avenge Ascastus' good name. Foolish as he was, it was up to Acastus to avenge his brothers' death now. If that meant splattering those responsible against a closed shield, rather than by his own hand, so be it. But, there was still that nagging desire to see Sheppard and Devane on their knees before him when he took their lives.

Fifteen SG Teams stood ready in the Atlantis gateroom, ready for the assault on PS4-887. Caldwell gave the order for the UAV to launch and Zelenka sent the drone through the gate. Almost immediately, the UAV began transmitting data and video back to Atlantis, indicating that the shield was not up and there were no signs of humans anywhere in the immediate vicinity of the stargate.

Caldwell gave the order for teams to begin moving out. With Sheppard's team in the lead, the teams moved in, two-by-two. Sheppard's gut was screaming at him that it was a trap, that it shouldn't have been that easy for them to enter the city unmolested. Mitchell, following close behind, agreed wholeheartedly with his assessment.

Sheppard gave the order for everyone to hold their positions around the control room, taking a defensive stance against anyone who might attack from the different hallways leading into the control room. When the last team, led by Logan, arrived, Sheppard radioed back to Atlantis that they were all safe and accounted for, had met no resistance, as of yet, and would be spreading out to search the city for the Genii. Caldwell reminded him again to be cautious, knowing who they were dealing with.

"What do you think?" Mitchell asked Sheppard.

"I think it's a trap, that's what I think. If I know Kolya, and I DO, he's waiting for a chance to try and get the jump on us."

"And he'd love to get his hands on you, wouldn't he?" Mitchell arched an eyebrow at him.

"No question... Logan, too," Sheppard nodded.

"Well, we'll just have to make sure he doesn't, won't we?"

Sheppard nodded gravely. The fifteen teams slowly fanned out in an organized search pattern, careful to always keep the other teams in full view to avoid any divide and conquer scenarios Kolya might have planned for them, but soon enough, they reached a point where they could no longer do so. They'd covered every inch of space surrounding the main control area without turning up a sign of anyone.

While it would have been simpler, had they brought a ZPM to power the systems and use the city's sensors to root the Genii out, they didn't want to chance having that ZPM fall into the hands of their enemy, in the unlikely event they were overpowered by them. So, they conducted their search the old fashioned way.

Zat and stunner fire lit up the southeast corner of the city. Six teams had finally flushed out somewhere around fifty Genii soldiers. When the fire fight was over, all fifty had been incapacitated, and only two of the Lanteans had sustained minor injuries, grazing gunshot wounds. They set about disarming the unconscious men and then securing them with the tough plastic handcuffs they'd brought with them. Once that was accomplished, they set two teams to keep watch and the other four teams went to join the others to continue the search.

Within hours the Lanteans had flushed out and subdued forty other Genii. By the time they reached the westernmost point of the city, the Lanteans were so spread out they could no longer maintain visual contact with the other teams. A sudden commotion in a room at the end of a long hallway sent Logan running to back up the other two teams. As soon as she burst through the door, a small explosion detonated around the doorway, sending debris raining down. Logan dove out of the way, landing in a heap on top of Daniel, Teal'c and Sheppard.

Once the dust settled, they could see that the entrance was blocked by rubble from the explosion. The nine of them sprang to their feet, assuming a defensive circle and raising their weapons to fire at anything that moved. On the other side of the debris, they could hear Bates shouting orders.

Sheppard keyed his miecand called out to Bates.

"Okay people, we tripped one trap, let's assume there are others and proceed accordingly. Bates, you are in charge out there, you know what to do. Acknowledge."

"Understood sir," came Bates' reply.

"How do you want to..."

A single gunshot wound rang out from above, striking Teal'c in the shoulder. Teal'c went down to one knee as the others looked up to see where the shot might have come from. The smoke from the rubble was still hanging in the air, obstructing their view.

"Who wants to be next?" Kolya shouted.

Sheppard's jaw tightened. "Kolya," he whispered to the others.

"A tactic we learned from you, Sheppard...I think you know that my people have the advantage, and unless you'd like to see another of your team go down, I suggest you disarm yourselves right now."

"Haven't we talked about your overconfidence before, Kolya?" Shepaprd snarked. "You have to know that we've taken control of the city."

"Out there you have. But, as you can see, you are now separated from the rest of your people. It'll take some time for them to be able to dig through the rubble to help you, so, you see in here, WE hold the high ground."

"Perfect trap," Mitchell whispered to Sheppard.

"Yeah, yeah," he whispered back.

"You have my word that no more shots will be fired, provided you cooperate."

"I don't have a whole lot of faith in your word, Kolya," Sheppard replied.

"Nevertheless, it appears you have no other choice."

Teal'c was bleeding profusely, and in desperate need of a tourniquet. Logan moved to help him, but was stopped by a sharp bark from Kolya. "Move and he dies!"

Logan looked over at Sheppard, Carter and Mitchell helplessly. She would follow their lead. A long look passed between the four Colonel's before they signaled the others to lower their weapons. Kolya smiled victoriously as he stepped from the smoky shadows and slowly walked toward Sheppard.

"I wish I could say it was nice to see you again, Kolya," Sheppard snarked.

"Yet I couldn't be happier to see you...Colonel..."

Kolya studied each one of them carefully before speaking again. His eyes finally rested on both Carter and Logan. He'd been unable to determine before which one of them might be the Colonel Devane he was looking for, but now, at close range, he could read the names stitched on their uniforms.

"Colonel Carter, I don't believe I've heard your name before...but _you_ , Colonel Devane..." stepping in front of Logan. "You, I HAVE heard of."

Sheppard stiffened but tried not to let it show.

"My reputation preceeds me?" she quipped.

"Indeed. I haven't had the pleasure, but I believe you were well acquainted with my brother, Jerud."

"Yes, I had the displeasure of meeting him," she nodded.

"And yet, he was apparently quite taken with you..." he looked her up and down. "I must admit, I can see why now," he leered.

In an effort to deflect attention from Logan, Mitchell coughed and cleared his throat to speak. "Well, you have our attention, so what is it you want?"

Kolya glanced over at Mitchell and read the name on his uniform. "Colonel...Mitchell... I am unfamiliar with your name as well. You were not in Atlantis during my visit there."

"Nope."

"Nor were you... Jackson...What rank do you hold?" Kolya eyed him curiously.

"I don't," Jackson replied.

"Let me guess... A doctor, like McKay here?"

"Not exactly," Daniel shrugged.

"And this one..." eyeing Teal'c, who had since gotten to his feet.

"He's not like Dr. McKay either," Mitchell said.

"I can see that... He doesn't appear to be like any of you..."

"Which is why you shot him first..." Sheppard stated.

"Very perceptive," he smirked, before turning his attention to the next person in line. "Teyla Emmagan, I believe?"

Teyla nodded but did not speak.

"Now that we've all exchanged pleasantries, can we get on with it?" Sheppard snapped.

"You know, when it became clear that we would not be able to power the city's defensive systems, all I really cared about was getting my hands on the two of you..." indicating Sheppard and Logan. "Imagine my delight at actually capturing two of the most wanted enemies of the Genii, as well as the ever amusing Dr. McKay?"

"We're so happy you're pleased," Mitchell snarked.

"I'm sure."

"There's just one problem with your plan though..." Carter pointed out.

"And what's that?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"You're never going to make it out of here with your prizes," Mitchell finished for her.

"I'm aware of that," Kolya nodded. "But, as helpful as the good doctor here might be to my people, and perhaps these others as well, I will still be considered a hero to my people for bringing down their enemy."

"Uh-huh... And they're going to find out about this...how?" Mitchell asked.

"You didn't kill any of my men, this time. I can only assume that is some misguided attempt on your part at portraying yourselves as merciful and benevolent. My men will tell the Genii that I was able to kill you, before your people killed me."

"Uh-huh... This is all assuming, of course, that we plan on returning your men to the Genii, rather than holding them as prisoners of war," Mitchell told him.

Kolya smiled, his eyes cold and dark as he turned to face Sheppard. "You know what, Sheppard? I really don't care anymore. I have the two people I want most. I may even allow the others to go..."

"I'm the only one you really want, Kolya. The others have nothing to do with OUR fight," Sheppard insisted.

"True enough, however..." moving over to stand in front of Logan again. "Colonel Devane here has her own debt to pay to me, doesn't she?"

Logan stared back at him calmly, unwilling to give him the satisfaction of rattling her.

Sheppard tried to remain calm. "Your brother USED her to get to me. She's an innocent victim in all of this."

"She's a warrior, just like you Sheppard. Although... she _is_ a lot easier on the eyes," he smirked.

"Can you guys stop talking about me like I'm not here?" she complained.

"My apologies, Colonel Devane, I'll speak directly to you from here on." Kolya signaled his men, who moved in and herded the others away from Sheppard and Logan.

"You could at least let one of us help our wounded man," Logan said.

"Very well... Teyla can do the honors. You see, I CAN be reasonable."

Sheppard snorted sarcastically. "Sure you can."

Kolya whirled around and pointed a gun at Sheppard, eliciting a quiet gasp from Logan. "Colonel Sheppard, Colonel Devane, I'd like the two of you to get down on your knees, please."

"No!" they snapped simultaneously.

"But, I even said 'please'," he shrugged.

"No," they repeated.

"And here I thought you had agreed to cooperate."

"Cooperation doesn't mean bowing down before you," Sheppard growled.

"It does to me, now... _get_ on your knees," he snarled menacingly.

"You'll have to shoot me first," Sheppard told him.

Kolya fired his gun without blinking, striking Sheppard in the thigh. Logan and the others cried out as she dropped to the floor beside the writhing Sheppard.

"B*stard!" she shouted, tearing off her sleeve and wrapping it around his bleeding leg to staunch the flow of blood.

Kolya smiled menacingly. "He _did_ tell me to."

Though they were both on the floor, neither of them was in a kneeling position. Logan sat crosslegged, with Sheppard's leg in her lap, as she applied pressure to the wound. She could tell that the bullet, fortunately, wasn't a very high caliber one, or it would have done a lot more damage.

"Feel better?" Carter asked.

"A little," Kolya grinned.

"Nothing like shooting an unarmed man to make YOU feel like a man," Logan seethed.

"Careful now, you might hurt my feelings." Kolya warned.

"If that's the only thing I hurt, you can consider yourself lucky!" she snapped.

Kolya laughed. "You ARE spunky! Between that and your beauty, it's no wonder my brother found you so intriguing."

"Leave her alone," Daniel growled.

"Ah, so it's not just Sheppard who feels so protective of her. What about this one here?" he pointed at Carter.

Daniel and Mitchell both eased their bodies in front of Carter, while McKay and Lorne crowded closer to Teyla. It wasn't as if Kolya hadn't used or threatened women before.

The sounds of men digging on the other side of the crumbled doorway were getting louder. Kolya looked over, then turned back to face them.

"It would seem that we're becoming short of time, so I'll have to start wrapping this up..."

Sheppard struggled to a sitting position, desperately trying to put his body between Kolya and Logan as Kolya strode purposefully towards them. He raised his gun and pointed at Sheppard.

"No!" cried Logan, pushing Sheppard back down and throwing herself over him protectively.

"NO!" the others cried collectively.

Suddenly a bright light flashed through the room and Kolya disappeared, then one by one, each of his men also disappeared into the light. The nine of them looked around in wonder, confused as to what had just happened. Their radios lit up and the sound of Caldwell's voice came over the receivers.

"Colonel Sheppard, this is Caldwell. We have Kolya and his men with us on board the Daedalus."

They all looked at each other and smiled. "Colonel Caldwell, this is Devane... If we'd known you were coming, we'd have baked a cake," she quipped.

"Thought of it after you left. I had a feeling you might need a little backup."

"Yes we did... We're barricaded in and have wounded down here, Colonel. Can you transport Colonel Sheppard and Teal'c out of here for immediate medical attention?"

"Consider it done." Moments later, they were all on board the Daedalus, and except for Sheppard and Teal'c, were beginning their debriefing.

"He wasn't pleased, that's for sure."

"Your timing couldn't have been better, sir." Mitchell informed him. "Kolya was about to shoot Colonels Sheppard and Devane right before you transported him out."

"I figured as much. He was too stunned and well... amazed... by the ship to say much of anything. He was immediately escorted to the brig and placed in a separate cell from his men."

"Good. Permission to go and shoot HIM in the leg, sir?" Logan said.

"Denied, Colonel, but I understand the sentiment."

"I'm pretty sure we rounded up all the Genii, sir. I'd like to keep my team here with the others, just to make sure." Mitchell said.

"That's fine. Once Sheppard and Teal'c have been tended to, we're going to send you all back down to the city. It's faster to travel to Atlantis by gate than ship. Colonel Devane, your team can return to Atlantis, along with Sheppard's, now that the Genii have been handled. We don't want to leave our own world unprotected."

"Yes sir."

"Colonel Caldwell?" Daniel began. "What are you going to do with the Genii?"

Caldwell shrugged. "We'll send the majority back... These ten, along with Kolya? We'll probably hold onto them...At least for a while."

Logan smiled, unabashedly pleased with Caldwell's decision.

After debriefing, Logan hurried down to the ship'S infirmary to check on Sheppard and Teal'c. Both had been stabilized and were being prepared for transport to the city. Logan gave Teal'c a quick kiss on the forehead as they wheeled him out of the room. Two female medics were hovering over - OR rather, FLIRTING - with Sheppard. They looked enormously disappointed when Logan ordered them out of the room as well. Once the door closed, an irate Logan whirled on Sheppard.

"You'll have to SHOOT me?!" she yelled.

"It sounded good at the time," he shrugged meekly.

"You big dumb oaf!" she hollered. "If you EVER do anything like that again, I'll...I'll..."

"What?" he asked.

"I'll shoot you myself!" she said, getting right up in his face.

Sheppard reached up with both hands, grabbed her face and pulled her down on top of him, covering her mouth with his own.

Logan pulled back to look him in the eye. "And don't think that's going to get you out of trouble..."

He cut her off by planting another passionate kiss on her mouth. She struggled for a moment, then gave herself over to the magnificent sensation of his hands and mouth on hers. God, he was good. Logan allowed his hands to roam freely up and down her body for a few moments before reluctantly tearing herself away. Even under minor sedation, his passion for her was evident. She knew they'd be coming for him at any moment, so she threw a blanket over him to cloak the evidence of his arousal from anyone else.

"Even with a bullet in your leg?" she grinned wickedly.

"Even with one in my _head_ , woman..." he growled seductively.

"Behave!" she giggled.

The door opened behind her and the same two medics entered. "They're ready to transport him now, ma'am."

"I'll be right behind you," she assured him.

As they were wheeling him out the door, she heard one of them ask him: "Did you get cold, Colonel Sheppard?"

Logan grinned, thinking about the promise his kisses held for later. She'd wanted to go and see Kolya before heading back to the city, but she decided, after seeing Sheppard, that she could wait a while longer.


	26. Chapter 26

Once PS4-887 had been fully secured, two ZPM's were brought through and the city's defensive systems were the first to be powered up, thus ensuring that the Genii would never be able to gain access to the ancient city again. Once the city's database was initialized they soon discovered that this city had been called Sorenta, and had primarily been used for engineering and scientific research, rather than as a miltary base. There were weapons systems in place, of course, but they were more defensive than offensive in nature. They had a chair device, and maybe half a dozen jumpers.

What delighted Carter and McKay, however, were the most detailed instructions on building the drones for the ancient weapons systems they had seen yet. The rudimentary directions they'd found in the Atlantis database had given them little more than a starting point, but now? Here were complete, detailed, step-by-step instructions they never dared to hope for.

"Good thing Kolya's people weren't here long enough to power up the place and find all this!" Carter exclaimed.

"No kidding...Can you imagine? He'd have had access to information that he could have used to disable OUR shield and infiltrate Atlantis... Just for starters..."

The two of them happily engrossed themselves in the ancient database to see what other treasures they might find, while Daniel accessed a different database, detailing the cultural aspects of several worlds the ancients had seeded. Mitchell busied himself with seeing to the security needs of the newfound city.

Back in Atlantis, Logan was restlessly pacing around the infirmary, waiting for Sheppard to come out of surgery. Teal'c had been operated on first, as his injury had proven to be the more serious of the two. Even with the rejuvenating effects of tretonin, he still needed to have the offending hunk of lead removed from his body, so he could completely heal. She'd already checked on Teal'c, who was now in the healing hands of Teyla, who hadn't left his side since he was first wheeled out of surgery.

Everyone else was busy, so that left Logan alone to ponder the events of the day. 'Damn those Kolya brothers!' she thought. Those two lunatics had left nothing but misery and devastation in their wake. At least they had the last remaining one (she hoped) under THEIR control now, and didn't have to worry about him popping up at some inopportune time...

"Logan," Caldwell strode into the room, startling her.

"YES, sir..." she jumped.

"Sorry," he smiled apologetically. "How are they doing?"

"Teal'c is out of surgery and resting comfortably, Teyla's with him. John is still in surgery, but Carson assures me that he'll be just fine."

"Something you'll want to see before you'll believe it?"

She shrugged casually. "The wound was clean and not terribly deep, unlike Teal'c's. He'll be out of commission for a little while, but not too long."

"Look, Logan...I'm sorry I didn't get there a little sooner."

She placed a hand on his shoulder and looked him in the eye. "Steve, you got there in the nick of time. Sure, it would have been nice if neither Teal'c or John got shot, but they're okay. If you hadn't gotten there when you did, John and I - and most likely ALL of us would have been dead. AND...I have to give you props for dramatic effect. _Very_ nicely done. I'd have given just about anything to see Kolya's face when he materialized on the Daedalus."

"It WAS priceless," Caldwell agreed.

"I'll bet," she laughed.

"I'm glad you're okay."

"Me too...And Steve?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for pulling us out of there."

"Like I'd ever let the Genii get their hands on you again?" he said, flashing back on the last time a Kolya had ahold of her.

"I don't suppose there's any chance of me getting to...um... talk... to him...alone?" she ventured.

"Not a good idea."

"So that's a no?" she pouted.

"I'll think about it, how's that?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Fair enough," she placed a soft kiss on his cheek.

Sheppard would be furious with her, but when Caldwell later informed her that she could speak, semi-privately, with Kolya, Logan jumped at the chance. The guards would be positioned just outside the open doorway, but she would essentially be alone in the room with him.

When she entered the brig, she casually paced around the cell holding Kolya without saying a word. He stood ramrod straight, clearly trying to hold tightly to his dignity.

After a few moments, Logan smiled and moved closer to the cell bars. "So...? I trust they're treating you well?"

"Very."

"Which is more than you would do for one of us?"

"True," he nodded.

"My, we're being awfully monosyllabic today," she noted.

Kolya just stood there.

"You do understand why we kept you and let the others, well, MOST of the others go, don't you?"

"Yes."

"But you disagree?" she eyed him thoughtfully.

"Not in theory," he shrugged.

"I see... Just because it's YOU, not because we're wrong?" she prodded.

"Yes."

Logan nodded and resumed her pacing. "May I ask you something?"

"It's not like I could stop you. Whether or not I give you an answer is another matter entirely."

"Fair enough. Did you know, beforehand, what your brother was going to do?" she asked.

Kolya finally looked directly at her. "No, I did not."

"But you knew he was going to do SOMETHING," she prodded.

"I know he planned to, but he did not divulge what those plans might be."

"And you...encouraged him?"

"On the contrary. I told him not to waste his time."

This surprised her. That and the fact that she actually believed him. "Why? You hate us. I should think you would have jumped at the chance for payback."

"Right time, right place, perhaps I might have."

"Did you agree with his tactics?"

"No."

"But, you yourself used Dr. Weir as leverage over Colonel Sheppard before... What was so different about your brother using me?"

Kolya appeared to choose his words very carefully before speaking. "I understand that my brothers' plan involved...some rather... vulgar..." he trailed off. "Let's just say that I don't approve of using women that way, warriors or not, and leave it at that."

"Your brother mumbled something about treating women with respect, too... Right before he told me that he was going to allow his men to USE me, after MY men were through with me."

"The difference between us, is that I never would have stooped to that level to get what I wanted. And, having spent some time with you, I can't imagine that my brother would have really been able to go through with it."

Logan stopped pacing and stared at him. "Why?"

"You're a very beautiful, charming, intelligent woman..." he told her simply.

"So, had I been ugly, he wouldn't hesitate?" she snapped.

"I also said, charming and intelligent, though I failed to mention strong and courageous," he added.

"Forgive me if I don't take that as the compliment I'm sure you intended it to be. So, I guess it WOULD surprise you, then, to know that he not only intended to go through with his plan for me, despite my charms, he actually set it in motion?"

"I beg your pardon?" he gaped at her.

"He tried to execute his plan. He released the...intoxicant... in the cell holding my people. Fortunately, for them, they had become immune after their first encounter with it."

He studied her face as she spoke and knew, however much it pained him, that she was telling the truth. "I see."

"Would you still have come after Colonel Sheppard and myself if you'd known the truth about what Jerud did?"

"In all honesty... Yes, I would. Whatever he did, whatever he was... Jerud was my brother. He died at your hands. As for Sheppard? The score I have to settle with him goes back to long before you arrived here."

"So you feel it was your duty to avenge your brother... No matter how _wrong_ he was, or who he hurt?" she stared up into his eyes.

Kolya took another deep breath. "I don't expect you to understand. Keep in mind, however, that there WAS the other matter of defending our new city against invaders. It just so happened that YOUR people were the invaders."

"Good, 'cause I _don't_ understand how you could defend him!" she snapped. "And as for the city? You and I both know that there was no way we could allow you to establish a foothold there."

"You felt threatened."

"You're damn right we did. You would have taken advantage of all the knowledge that database gave you to gain access to Atlantis, so you could try and destroy us."

"Can you blame us?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

Logan stared at him, utterly flabbergasted. "Yes!"

"Why?"

"Kolya, are you completely dense? With all of the knowledge we have gained, with the technology we've acquired, in addition to what we already had, have we ever ONCE tried to destroy the Genii?"

"You would eventually..." he stammered, suddenly not quite as sure.

"If we wanted to, we could have done it when your people first betrayed ours. You've seen for yourself the kind of firepower we have, the ship you were on...We could have wiped your people off the face of the planet, and we could have blown your underground facility to smithereens to boot! But we didn't. And we have left you alone ever since. In all this time, all these years since that first time, we have NEVER come after you."

"The new city..."

"Protecting our own, Kolya. We took it from you becauase we knew your people couldn't be trusted to show the same...restraint...we have always shown you. Letting you have that city, would have been like leaving the front door wide open for your troops to come marching into our city and just standing there while you wiped all of us out. We couldn't allow that to happen."

Kolya nodded, choosing not to argue the point. "How long am I to be held?"

"I really don't know."

"I appreciate your honesty."

"I wish you could appreciate how WRONG your people have been in the way they dealt with mine. Our two peoples could have been allies...FRIENDS even, had your leaders not been so pig-headed and blind. We would have helped you over the years. We have the ability to shield worlds against the Wraith now. Shields we would have been happy to share with you, to protect your people from the cullings. But your leaders chose to be our enemy...And now your people are suffering because of it."

"You expect me to believe that you would have given us the shield technology?"

"We've already built shields on many worlds. My people PROTECT their friends, Kolya. Hell, we've even been known to look out for our enemies, on occasion too!"

He could not deny the truth in her eyes.

LATER

"Dammit Sparky!" Sheppard bellowed. "What the hell were you thinking?"

Logan eyed him calmly. "I was thinking that I had a right to confront the man who threatened to kill me...and who shot the man I love."

"Sure you have that _right_... But not ALONE!" he countered. Even knowing he would do the same thing had their positions been reversed.

"I wasn't ALONE-alone...The guards were right outside the door AND Kolya was locked in a CELL, for cryin' out loud!"

"Yeah...well...So _what_?! There still wasn't any need for you to go alone."

Logan stifled a grin as she thought of a way to distract him. "You mean, without YOU?" she asked, pushing him back against the pillows on their bed.

"Maybe..."

"Cause we're so much stronger together than apart..." she murmured, easing his arms out of his t-shirt and pulling it off, over his head.

"Partly..." he closed his eyes as she began trailing kisses across his chest and down to his navel.

"Well, I certainly don't want to upset you any more, or hinder your recovery in any way, so I guess..." tugging at the drawstring of his shorts, "...I'll just have to stay away from him in the future, unless you're there to protect me from the big, bad Genii..."

Sheppard's eyes glazed over as she stood up and pulled her own shirt over her head. "Ummm... remind me to be mad at you later?" he croaked, suddenly hoarse.

"Sure thing, flyboy," she tossed her shirt at him, followed by her bra, then began backing away from the bed.

Sheppard's grin faded with every step she took. "Uh...Sparks?"

"Mmmmm...?" she dropped her pants and flung them across the room with one foot.

"Where ya going?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"I just wanted you to be comfortable, since you're confined to bed. I'm gonna go take a shower... Feel kind of ooky after talking to Kolya earlier..." she shrugged and then disappeared around the corner.

Sheppard stared after her, befuddled. Before he could open his mouth, her panties came flying across the room.

"Love you!" she called out.

"I don't THINK so, woman!" he muttered, struggling to rise from the bed.

Before he could get up, Logan streaked across the room and pushed him back again, then slowly climbed on top of him, careful not to touch his bullet wound.

"Where do you think YOU'RE going, mister?" she asked.

"I was comin' after YOU, wench!" he growled.

"Really...?" her eyes sparkled mischievously.

Sheppard's hands roamed freely over her curves as he looked into her eyes. "You don't really think I could just let you walk away... after stripping me down... stripping yourself down... and not do something about it...?" he trailed off as her mouth clamped down on his.

God, he loved her! He loved her inner-beauty. Her strength and spirit and fire. He loved how her body fit so perfectly with his, and how she was always ready to make love to him, no matter when or where. He loved that she wasn't the least bit shy about expressing her desire for him. And he LOVED, most of all, that she loved HIM.

This was the way it was always supposed to be. Mated, not just in body, but soul. Truthfully though, physical expression of the love they shared aside, it really had been this way all along. They had been bonded together for as long as either of them could remember.


	27. Chapter 27

TWO WEEKS LATER

Sheppard returned from his first mission since he'd been shot by Kolya, and had been summoned to the conference room, where he found Logan practically spitting fire. Caldwell and Weir were with her and looked none too happy either.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Idiot!" Logan snapped.

"Okay...What'd I do?" he looked at her warily, inwardly cringing at the thought of being the object of her ire.

"Not you, John," Weir assured him.

"Oh... _good_. Who are we mad at then?" he asked, more than a little relieved.

Caldwell's jaw tightened, as it always did when he was angry. "Some brain trust back on Earth. They would like to harvest those..."

"Horny-blossoms!" Logan filled in for him.

"For scientific research..." Weir added.

"Like the world needs another little blue pill!" Logan snarked.

"Wait...They...WHAT?!" he gawked at them in shock.

"It's not official yet, but General Landry gave me a heads up that the order would probably be coming...soon..." Caldwell informed him.

"I thought these people were supposed to be intelligent!" Logan barked then stomped out of the room.

Sheppard moved to follow her, but Caldwell held him back with a glance. "Let her go, Colonel..."

"Go where?" Weir asked.

"I have a pretty good idea... but I'm not 100% sure. Either way, we shouldn't stop her," Caldwell insisted.

Bates caught up to her as she stomped up the jumper's ramp. He'd seen her storm out of the conference room, and followed her at Sheppard's signal.

"Shotgun, ma'am!" he called out.

"This is not a pleasure trip, Lieutenant."

"Even better!" he chirped, taking a seat in the co-pilot's chair.

Logan shrugged and eased into the pilot's seat. She powered up the jumper and then punched in the gate address. Bates' eyes widened as he recognized the coordinates.

"Ma'am?"

"We're going to do a little weed burning, Lieutenant..."

With that, they dropped into the gateroom, pausing only a moment for Logan to look over at Caldwell, who nodded almost imperceptibly. The jumper accelerated through the gate and they were gone.

"She's not going to..." Weir began.

Both Sheppard and Caldwell held up a hand to cut her off. "I'm sure it's just standard recon, Doctor," Caldwell assured her.

"Of course," Weir smiled. Sometimes military types were okay.

When they emerged through the stargate, Logan and Bates looked down at the planet's surface in horror.

"My God...They're everywhere!" Bates exclaimed.

"It was just a little bush when we were here before..." Logan gasped, shaking her head in disbelief.

Now she KNEW she was doing the right thing. The flowery shrubs covered at least 1/3 of the land mass on the planet, apparently having spread like wildfire since their last visit.

"HazMat Suits," Logan ordered.

Bates immediately hopped up, went to a storage bin and grabbed two HazMat suits. He put on his suit and then took the controls so she could shrug into her own, but it quickly became clear, however, that setting down on the planet was out of the question, as was getting too close. Logan didn't want any stray spores to attach themselves to the jumper, and be carried back to Atlantis. Abandoning the suits, they formulated a new plan.

She maneuvered the jumper into position, while Bates manned the weapons systems. On her order, he fired off several rounds of explosives designed to set the offending foliage ablaze. Moving to a new quadrant, they repeated the process again and again until every last bush burned to ashes. When the last of the fires burned itself out, Logan carefully circled the planet to make absolutely sure they'd left none standing. It had taken eight hours, from start to finish, but they managed to obliterate any vestige of the dangerous plant.

"Well, that takes care of that!" she smiled wearily.

"Ma'am? May I ask... Why the sudden rush to destroy these things?"

She looked over at Bates. "It's something that should have been done a long time ago, Lieutenant. Long before the Genii, or anyone ELSE for that matter, could get their hands on them..." she trailed off.

Bates nodded perceptively. He guessed, correctly, that they were about to get orders to send some of those plants back to Earth. No doubt some scientist somewhere had come up with some hare-brained scheme to use them for the good of mankind; thinking that *they* would be able to control the contagion the plants had released on Atlantis.

"I like your style, ma'am," he grinned.

"Thanks! Ready to go home?" she asked.

"All set!" he sat back and dialed the Delta-Site gate.

As Bates sent his code, he also radioed for a containment team to meet them out in the open, so they could quarantine the jumper and check for any sign of the damned horny-blossom spores. By the time Logan, Bates and the jumper had been cleared through decon and returned to Atlantis, Caldwell had indeed received orders to allow some scientists from Earth to travel through Atlantis to retrieve some samples from the planet.

"Why would they do that?" Sheppard was shaking his head when Logan came in. "Don't they GET how dangerous those things are?"

Weir snorted. "Probably one of the higher ups who has his own... _plumbing_...problem, and thinks this might be his holy grail."

The others stifled laughter, gaping at her in surprise. Weir wasn't usually one to crack wise about things like that.

"How long before they get here?" Sheppard asked.

Caldwell checked his watch. "Should be anytime now."

"What do we tell them?" Sheppard asked.

"Nothing." Weir replied.

"Nothing?" Sheppard gaped at her again.

"We let them go about their mission without complaint, just like we've been ordered to." Caldwell backed her up.

"Sir..." Logan began. "You don't...have to... "

Caldwell arched an eyebrow at her. "Do what, Colonel? There have been no official missions to that planet since the first one. No one has been ordered to go back there, until now. I haven't received any reports, from ANYONE indicating there might be a problem, OR that they might have taken drastic steps to ensure that there would never be another outbreak of the contagion, like we experienced here, anywhere else. And frankly, I don't EXPECT to receive any such report, now or in the future."

Logan gaped up at him, while Sheppard and Weir smiled their approval.

"Understood, sir."

Caldwell nodded. "Good. Sheppard?"

"Understood sir."

"Now, as for Lieutenant Bates? I think he's well overdue for a visit to the mainland, don't you?"

"Yes, sir. I'm sure he'll appreciate the time off," Logan nodded.

"Good, Colonel Sheppard, will you see to it that he gets underway..." checking his watch again. "Now?"

"Right away, sir!" Sheppard headed for the door.

The alarm began blaring, followed by the inevitable announcement: "Off-world activation."

Caldwell, Logan and Weir watched from the window as the team from Earth was first cleared by gate personnel and then appeared through the event horizon.

"I'll go and greet our guests," Weir said, excusing herself.

After she went, Logan looked up at Caldwell and smiled warmly. "You're a one of a kind, you know that, Steve?"

Caldwell shrugged, taking her hand in his. "Maybe I've been hanging around Sheppard too long, but there are some times when you have to take matters into your own hands for the greater good of those who don't fully understand or appreciate the danger in certain situations."

"Very true," she nodded.

"If you hadn't bolted the way you did, I was going to order SOMEONE to go anyway," he told her.

"I know," she winced. "I didn't want you to have to make that decision."

"I figured as much. Which is why I didn't ask any questions or try to stop you, and why I stopped Sheppard from going after you."

"Plausible deniability... " she mused. "A concept our highest ranking governmental leaders should appreciate."

"That's for sure."

"They're gonna be pissed," she grinned wickedly.

"What a shame," he chuckled.

ONE HOUR LATER

"Who's coming with us?" Dr. Frye asked.

Caldwell stared at him, unsmiling. "It was my understanding that you guys were on your own."

"But...What about...You can't send us out there unprotected!" Frye squeaked.

"Why didn't you bring a military team with you from Earth?" Caldwell asked.

"There's military here... We didn't think..." he trailed off, looking around wildly.

"There seems to be a whole lot of that going around, Doctor," Caldwell grunted.

"What?" he blinked.

"People who don't _think_. We communicated the EXTREME danger in handling those plants, and yet SOMEONE in their infinite wisdom chose to disregard that warning. Now you expect me to put MY people and this city at risk over this?"

"With the HazMat suits we're perfectly safe."

Caldwell glared dangerously at him, causing Frye to back up a step or two. "You have no idea what you're dealing with here, but *I* do...Now, if I'm ORDERED to send a team with you, I will; but not until then."

"Fine...If you'll allow me to contact Earth?" Frye sniffed disdainfully.

"Of course," Caldwell stepped aside and pointed toward the communications console.

Within fifteen minutes, Caldwell had his orders to send one SG Team, along with the five scientists, in order to protect them. Caldwell shrugged and sent for Sheppard and his team. Ten minutes later, all nine were assembled, in full HazMat gear, in front of the gate.

"All of you, there will be no going off on your own to explore, there will be no side trips. We go in, you collect your specimens, and we get straight back here again. No one, at any time, removes their HazMat suits, for any reason. Once we've returned, we go straight to quarantine. No arguments, no excuses, no whining. Are we clear?"

The five scientists glared at him, but all nodded their understanding. Caldwell signaled his men to dial the gate and stood back to watch Sheppard lead them through the gate. He smiled and turned to Weir.

"Any bets on how long it'll take?" he asked.

"I should think it would be obvious almost immediately."

"So, what? Five? Ten minutes?"

"Tops!" she grinned.

It actually took fifteen before the alarms went off and the wormhole reopened.

"Colonel Caldwell, this is Sheppard."

"Is there a problem, Colonel? We didn't expect to hear from you so soon," he lied.

"Well, sir... The good Doctors here wanted me to confirm that you sent us to the right place."

"What do you mean 'the right place'?" Caldwell asked.

"They got the idea into their heads that we may have dialed the wrong gate," Sheppard informed him.

"Why would they think that?" Weir asked.

"The planet appears to be...barren, sir..."

"How can that be, Colonel?"

"Well, frankly sir, it looks like a fire swept through here or something. Everything is... gone. Trees, grass, brush, foliage...all burned," he replied.

Caldwell paused. "Wraith?" he asked, knowing that the others were listening intently.

"That'd be my guess, sir. Or the Genii... I'm sure they were having their own problems with the damned bushes."

"True enough. You're sure there's no sign of any living plants?" Caldwell prodded.

"Doesn't look like it, sir. We can bring a jumper back later, to be sure, but from here it doesn't look like anything survived," he assured them.

"Understood. Bring them home, Colonel."

"Yes, sir."

Moments later, all nine were back in the city, and being whisked away to decon.

"They didn't look too happy," Weir remarked.

"Yeah...it's a real shame, isn't it?" he quipped.

A few hours later, the five disgruntled scientists were seated in the conference room.

"How could they just...destroy them all?" Frye was saying to his colleagues. "The science... they've ruined any chance of..."

"Getting infected?" Caldwell finished for them.

"You don't understand the advances that could have been made..." Collins snapped at him.

"Advances in _what_? Yet another little blue pill?" Caldwell rolled his eyes at them.

"Not everyone is as...fortunate...as you...in that arena, Colonel Caldwell," stammered a clearly smitten Dr. Camp. "And the benefits could have been universal - for men and women both."

Caldwell flashed her a condescending look. "At what price, Doctor? Those things triggered more than ardor in the men here. It triggered uncontrollable aggression and violence - just ask any of the women in this city what they went through when that contagion took hold!"

"We would have been extremely careful with the samples, of course, to avoid such an occurance," she insisted.

"Doesn't what we saw on that planet TELL you people anything? Obviously we weren't the only ones who... For someone to go to such lengths to destroy any trace of those plants..." Sheppard trailed off at the sight of five blank faces staring vacantly at him. "No, you're all too arrogant to believe that it could ever get out of YOUR control!"

"I'll have Colonel Sheppard fly you back in a jumper so you can do a thorough scan of the area. Beyond that... I don't know what else you expect us to do."

"I don't suppose you kept any samples here?" Frye ventured.

"Are you KIDDING?!" Sheppard snapped irritably. "After what happened? No way!"

"It was worth a try," Camp murmured.

While they waited for a jumper to be prepared, Caldwell contacted the SGC to relate their findings to General Landry.

"All of it?" he asked.

"That's correct, sir. Colonel Sheppard is going to take them back to the planet in one of the jumpers so they can do a thorough scan of the entire planet, just to make sure."

"Very well," Landry said. "Keep me informed."

"Will do, sir."

The subsequent scan revealed precisely what Sheppard had predicted. Four of the scientists gave in and accepted the fact that they were out of luck, and only one - Dr. Camp - began to raise questions.

"Why would the Wraith destroy them? The contagion wouldn't be likely to affect them the same way it does humans."

Sheppard arched an eyebrow. "Uh, Doctor, we don't know HOW it would affect them, and frankly, given their already bad temperament...Well, let's just say *I* wouldn't want to come up against a Wraith who was suffering from the effects of those damned horny-blossoms."

Camp blushed, but continued pressing. "And these Genii... In the reports we read, it said they harvested some of the plants to use as a weapon against you... Why would they destroy any means they had to best you?"

Sheppard stiffened at her casual mention of the Genii. "The Genii aren't nearly as smart as they think they are. Their plan to use the contagion against us backfired on them. Since it appeared that our men had built an immunity against it, they were able to fight back, while the Genii succumbed to the effects and ended up back on their home planet looking for women to... violate."

"I see..." she studied his face for a moment. "You're happy then...that the plants have been destroyed?"

Sheppard made no effort to hide his pleasure about it. "Having suffered the effects myself... and the makeshift cure we came up with...? Yes, I _am_."

"Given how you all feel about this, I wonder... Why is it that none of you took it upon yourselves to destroy the plants after what you went through..."

Sheppard shrugged casually. "Good question. Maybe we should have. I guess no one saw the need, since there weren't any people living here, we really had no reason to come back..." glancing over at her. "...Until now..."

"What about when the Genii used it against you? Didn't you want to come back and destroy the plants to prevent them from using them against you in the future?"

Sheppard appeared to think about it for a moment. "To be honest, not really. As I said, their own plan backfired on them, so the likelihood of them trying that again was pretty remote. Plus, we HAVE had our hands full with... other... things."

"I see..." she murmured.

ONE HOUR LATER

"Excuse me?" Caldwell glared at her.

"I'd like to speak to your Genii prisoner," Camp repeated.

"Why?" Caldwell and Sheppard asked in unison.

"I want to ask him about the plants."

"What about them?" Caldwell asked.

"Oh, the effect on his people, how they were harvested, if they destroyed them or if have any more specimens...Things like that."

"Kolya is a soldier, not a scientist. AND if he can be believed, which I highly doubt, he had nothing to do with his brother's plan to harvest and use those plants on Colonel Devane and the others," Sheppard seethed.

"I'd like to ask him that myself, if you don't mind. And speaking of Colonel Devane... I'd like to speak to her as well."

"Why?" they asked in unison again.

"Maybe the man told her something while she was separated from the rest of you that could be useful in my research."

"You have her report. Are you trying to insinuate that she held something back?" Caldwell growled at her.

"No, of course not. But her report was military, not scientific. I may be able to learn something that she didn't realize would be useful."

"Colonel Devane is no scientist, and that whole experience was very traumatic for her. I won't have you unnecessarily upsetting my people, Doctor!" Caldwell growled.

"I have no intention of upsetting her. Now please, may I see this Genii, Kolya?"

Caldwell's jaw tightened in anger. "Sure. Colonel Sheppard, if you please?"

"Yes, sir," he glared at Camp. "Follow me."

"I'll need to speak to you, too, Colonel Caldwell... About your own captivity and exposure to the plant."

"Whatever..." he muttered and then left the room.

ATLANTIS BRIG****

"So your people didn't destroy the crop of plants after their... experience with them?"

"Not that I'm aware of... But then, such matters wouldn't have fallen under my area of expertise."

"How did your brother learn about these plants?" she asked.

"I understand he had been working with a spy, from within the Athosian camp, and learned about it from him. I was not privy to my brothers' plan."

"So I've been told... Were you present when the infected men returned to your world?" she went on.

"I was not."

"But you know what happened."

"Those who were infected were rounded up and... killed," he informed her.

Camp gasped in horror. "How... how did the others of your kind avoid getting infected themselves?"

"Precautions were taken. As a result we lost only about a hundred men."

Sheppard shook his head in disgust and Camp recoiled. "I... I see."

As they left the brig, Sheppard turned to her curiously. "So...You think the Genii destroyed those plants?"

"It...would certainly seem to...fit," she was still fighting down her revulsion at their tactics.

"I can see why you harbor such an ill will toward the Genii now."

"That wasn't apparent from reading our reports?" he chuckled humorlessly.

"It's one thing to read a report, Colonel, it's another thing entirely to experience it up close."

"Which would be OUR point in arguing against any use or experimentation of something as dangerous as those plants."

"Point taken," she nodded, though she didn't look convinced.

CONFERENCE ROOM

"You must have been terrified."

"I really didn't have time to be," Logan answered stiffly.

"Did he say anything to you about how they harvested the plants, or kept them contained?" Camp asked.

"No. He was too busy trying to scare me."

Camp kept her eyes on Logan's face. "Did you see the container?"

"It appeared to be plastic, or something like it."

"Airtight?" she prodded.

"Evidently, since neither he nor his men had been affected at the time," she bit back a yawn.

"Did he say anything about having any more?"

Logan shook her head. "No, but I got the impression he didn't have any more."

"Why is that?" she pressed.

"Just a feeling."

"Or wishful thinking?"

"Maybe."

"This...Jerud Kolya...Was he very much like his brother? The one you have prisoner here?" she asked.

"He was similar, yes."

"Thank you, Colonel Devane. I appreciate your help."

"May I make a suggestion, Doctor?" Logan arched an eyebrow at her.

"Certainly."

"If we do happen to run across any more of those plants... You should really give up on this idea you have to use them."

"I understand why you feel the way you do about this."

Logan shook her head vehemently. "No, Doctor, I don't think you do."

"What makes you say that?" Camp stared at her.

"If you REALLY did understand, you wouldn't be doing what you're doing now."

"I still believe, that under controlled conditions, we could truly do something good with it."

"There aren't enough controls to ensure against an outbreak. If you really want to do what's best for people, you wouldn't mess around with something like this."

Camp thought about what Logan had said to her while she searched for Colonel Caldwell. She really did understand her concerns, but she also believed that her experiences had colored her judgment. She smiled as she caught sight of Caldwell in his office at the end of the hall. Now THERE was a fine looking specimen. Truth be told, there was a part of her that almost wished SHE'D been around when he was infected with the plant's contagion. She couldn't imagine any woman WANTING to fight him off.

TWO DAYS LATER

After returning from her latest mission, Logan was on her way to Sheppard's quarters when she ran into Caldwell in the hallway. "Evenin' boss!" she chirped.

"Hey... I missed you when you got back from P23-923," he murmured, seemingly preoccupied.

She nodded. "Yeah, Elizabeth told me you were busy with something else."

"I was..." he nodded. "Look, I need to speak with both you and Sheppard...privately."

Logan suddenly felt like something heavy just dropped into her stomach. "Something wrong?" she asked, already knowing that there was.

"I'd rather tell both of you together."

"Okaaaaay..." Logan stopped at Sheppard's door, but rather than entering, as she normally would, she knocked. Sheppard opened the door and was somewhat surprised to find her standing there with Caldwell.

"The Colonel has something he needs to talk to us about," she informed him.

"What'd we do now?" he asked, wincing.

"Nothing. Mind if we come in?" Caldwell said seriously.

"Come on in," he stepped aside and motioned them in. "What's up?"

Caldwell motioned for them to sit down. "This is definitely not my favorite part of the job..." he began.

"Uh-oh..." they chimed together. That could only mean really bad news.

"John, I'm sorry to be the one to tell you... Your father... He's passed away..."

Logan gasped and immediately threw her arms around Sheppard, who was sitting there stunned. His arms came around her and held her tightly against him.

"My father... How?" he asked numbly.

"It was a brain tumor, John. He...uh...apparently had known about it for quite some time."

"Brain tumor...?" Logan murmured.

Sheppard shook his head. "He never said a word..."

"I understand he left a letter for each of you, for after he was gone. You both have six weeks leave, starting now."

"Six weeks?!" they cried in unison.

"Neither one of you has been back to Earth in YEARS. You both have built up significant leave time. There aren't many opportunities for you to be able to take leave together, so I want you to take it now. You're going to have a lot to do, making arrangements and such, and then... I want you to use some of that time to RELAX, visit some old friends..."

"Six weeks... I... uh... Sir..." Sheppard stammered.

"No arguments. Either of you. You'll take the whole six weeks. Look, they'll go over everything with you tomorrow at the SGC, General O'Neill will be there to meet you. Take tonight to pack anything you want to take and be ready to leave at 0700 hours."

"Yes, sir," Sheppard nodded numbly.

Caldwell stood up to leave. "John, I'm very sorry about your father. You too, Logan."

"Thank you sir," they replied.

As Caldwell reached for the control panel to the door, Logan jumped up and called out to him. "Sir?"

"Logan, I'd never let that happen" he smiled reassuringly at both of them and gave her hand an affectionate squeeze.

Sheppard stared at him blankly for a moment.

"No way I'm letting them keep you on Earth," Caldwell clarified at his blank expression.

After he'd gone, Logan crossed the room and sank down on Sheppard's lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. Tears streamed down both of their faces as they absorbed the news.

"I can't believe he's gone..." Sheppard croaked hoarsely.

"Me either... Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah...I'm just..." he trailed off, shaking his head.

"In shock..."

"Yeah..."

Logan pulled away for a moment, to wipe the tears from his face, then she took him by the hand and led him over to the bed. Gently pushing him down onto the bed, she removed his shirt and boots, then made him lie down while she kicked off her own shoes. She crawled into bed beside him, cradling his head against her chest, she just held him while they both cried.

Early the next morning they were up, showered, dressed, and standing by the gate at 0650. They graciously accepted the condolences offered by their friends and co-workers. It was an odd feeling to be going back to Earth after so long - something they both could have done long before now, but chose not to do out of the fear that they would be separated or reassigned.

Before they could dial the gate, the alarm went off, signaling an off-world activation.

"Who is it?" Caldwell asked.

"Receiving SG-1's IDC, sir."

"Let them in," Caldwell ordered.

The shield was lowered and a moment later, Mitchell, Carter, Teal'c and Daniel walked through the event horizon. They'd come to offer their condolences along with the others, and Logan and Sheppard were deeply touched by the gesture. Soon, though, Caldwell gave the order to dial Earth. The two of them looked back at everyone assembled in the gateroom to bid them goodbye and smiled.

"Take care of my city," Sheppard instructed Carter, who would be covering for them in their absence.

"I will," she promised.

They braced themselves and walked through the gate.

It was a surreal feeling to step through on the other side and see the SGC exactly as how they'd left it. Faces, both familiar and new looked down at them from the control room. General O'Neill and General Landry waited for them at the bottom of the ramp.

"Welcome home!" O'Neill called out.

They both stood at attention and saluted the General's.

"At ease, Colonel's," Landry said. "And welcome home."

"Thank you, sir," they chimed together.

O'Neill rolled his eyes and looked sideways at Landry. "They do that ALL the time," he said in a stage whisper. "Neither one of them can talk without the other's mouth moving."

Landry stifled a grin. "Let's get you situated, shall we?"

"Yes, sir. Thank you sir," they said in unison.

Landry looked over at O'Neill. "I see what you mean," he whispered back.


	28. Chapter 28

Three days later, Logan and Sheppard sat in the front of an unbelievably packed Veterans center for Tom Sheppard's memorial service. People had come from around the world and as far away as the Pegasus Galaxy to pay their respects. Not everyone had been allowed to come, as they couldn't very well leave Pegasus unguarded, but those closest to them had been permitted to attend. Caldwell and Weir were there only for the service itself, as were General's O'Neill, Hammond and Landry. But Daniel, Teal'c, Carter, McKay, Beckett, Teyla, Lorne and Bates had been granted a two-day leave. Mitchell had been left in charge of Pegasus until Caldwell and Weir returned.

Tom Sheppard had been a well respected Air Force Colonel in his own right, and the outpouring of respect from the men and women he served with over the years was overwhelming and deeply touching. Several times throughout the service, they'd both had to choke back tears, especially when they did the Missing Man fly-by.

After the service, everyone gathered inside for a luncheon. Caldwell and Weir found them before they became too entangled in entertaining the mourners, to excuse themselves and offer condolences again. They assured both of them, _again_ , that they would indeed be returning to Atlantis and not stuck on Earth, before bidding them goodbye. They were soon followed by O'Neill, Hammond and Landry, who also had to get back to their respective duties. Hammond to Pegasus, O'Neill to Washington, and Landry to the SGC.

A great many people sought out Sheppard, regaling him with stories about his father's exploits, stories he'd never heard before; and also to let him know how incredibly proud his father had been of him, even after the black mark he'd received in Afghanistan. Taking note of the insignia on his dress uniform, they expressed their delight that the black mark hadn't prevented him from getting promoted. Many also sought out Logan, knowing that Tom Sheppard had always thought of and treated her as his daughter.

By the end of the day, the two of them were thoroughly exhausted and emotionally drained. They'd managed to keep a tight reign on their emotions through it all, and maintain that stiff military bearing, but once everyone had gone and they returned to his father's house, they both broke down and sobbed. They were supposed to go out and have dinner and drinks with their friends from Atlantis, but neither of them really felt up to it and asked if they could do it the following evening.

It felt odd to be there, in Tom Sheppard's house. It had been true that he'd known for quite some time that he was dying. Tom's personal effects had already been meticulously packed up and organized before they even arrived. The service had been planned right down to the last detail by Tom himself. There was very little for Logan and Sheppard to do, by way of arrangements. Tom had decided against burial in Arlington, deciding rather to be cremated like his wife.

They'd been putting off, for two days reading the letters that Tom had left for them, but decided that now was as good a time as any. They exchanged letters, Logan reading his aloud and he reading hers.

"My dearest Son,

You are no doubt livid with me by this point, but I stand by my decision not to burden you with the news of my imminent passing. I came to Atlantis, as I told you, to make sure that you were happy and well. I cannot tell you what it means to me to know that you are not only happy, but thriving. And, in love with the one and only woman I could ever picture you spending your life with. You know how much I love and adore Logan and I couldn't be happier that you two have finally decided to share your lives together, as friends AND lovers.

I have left this house to both of you, though I'm not sure that you will ever have the need for it, if you plan on spending the rest of your lives in Atlantis. Still, it is yours to keep or to sell, as you see fit.

Aside from the request that you and Logan continue to live a long and happy life, and eventually have many children (HA!), I have one final request of you son. I want you to bring your mother and I home with you and Logan, to Atlantis. I want you to scatter our ashes across that great ocean of yours. Perhaps, in some small way, you will take some measure of comfort in feeling that your mother and I are there with you both, and that we're watching over you.

Know this, son. I love you with all my heart. And I am so very proud of the man you have become. It has been my profound honor to be your father. Be happy. Keep Logan happy. And give me lots of grandchildren, too!

Love, Pops"

Logan was crying so hard, she could barely make it through reading Tom's letter to John. With tears streaming sown his face, Sheppard took a deep breath and tore open the envelope containing her letter.

"Your turn...You ready?"

She nodded tearfully. "Ready."

"My Precious Daughter,

I have always thought of you as a daughter, I think you know that. Logan, I have loved you from the day you were born. Part of me knew, that first time we placed you in the crib with John, when you were barely three weeks old, that the two of you were destined to be together forever.

Doesn't sound like the crusty, old Colonel that you knew, does it? Nevertheless, it's true. I have watched you grow from a sweet, precocious infant to the extraordinary woman you are now and I am so proud of you. I know your parents would be, too.

I'm sure John has already told you, I have left this house to the both of you, to do with as you see fit. I want you to know that it gives me great comfort and peace to know that you will continue to always be there for John, as you have always been. You have many happy years ahead of you, the both of you, together. I know that your children will bring you as much joy as you and John brought to us, and to your parents.

I want to thank you for being the daughter I always wanted. I couldn't love you more if you WERE my flesh and blood. And I want to thank you for loving my son and making his life complete. Be happy. Take care of each other and know that we, all four of your parents, are watching over you. And, as soon as you can get around to it, I'd love to have lots of grandkids!

Love you baby,

Pops"

Logan and Sheppard clung to one another, alternately laughing and crying. Before exhaustion completely took over, they got up, took a shower and made love before falling asleep in each others' arms.

The following day, they sat down and hashed out what to do about the house. They considered keeping it, briefly, but when it came right down to it, they really couldn't keep it. They were planning on staying in Atlantis for as long as they possibly could, and if they did get recalled to Earth, they had no idea where they might end up being stationed. It really was more practical to sell the house and put the money away for the future. They'd both come to the conclusion that THAT is precisely what Tom had in mind anyway. He was simply letting them make the decision for themselves.

They then went through Tom's personal effects and took the mementos they wanted to keep with them. The rest they re-packed, to be placed in storage until they should happen to return for good. Since Tom had already made the arrangements prior to his death, they were able to have everything ready for pickup by the moving company later that afternoon. The furniture would be sold with the house, or donated for charity.

McKay called around lunch time to make sure they still wanted to go out that evening. Sheppard assured him that they would meet him and the others at Kincaid's, as planned. Kincaid's was a local restaurant and bar in town.

"Are we drinking?" she asked.

"We are," he smiled.

"A lot?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

"Does one of us have to be designated driver?" he asked.

"Not if we take a cab..." she grinned.

"Then we DRINK... A _lot_! To the old man!" he proclaimed.

"Hear, hear!" she smiled. "But first..." she tackled him to the floor and planted a passionate kiss on him.

"Oh... okay..." he grinned goofily. "If you insist!"

He rolled over on top of her and proceeded to strip her clothes off, slowly and methodically.

LATER THAT NIGHT

Sheppard and Carter were watching Daniel and Logan dancing together on the dance floor in the bar.

"You know," Carter began. "I always wished the two of them would get back together again."

Sheppard arched an eyebrow at her. "Oh?"

"Yeah...They were actually a pretty good match for one another..."

"Only not so much," he countered.

"I know, I know... What can I say, I'm a romantic at heart. I wanted to se my friends together and happy," she sighed.

"But they weren't... happy, I mean... all the time," he reminded her.

"Is ANYONE happy all the time?" she countered.

"I suppose not," he agreed.

"But, I know it wouldn't have worked out... Now, Kitah... _There's_ a good match for him" she smiled.

"Kitah? Have you been playing matchmaker, Colonel?" he teased.

"Hey! We agreed, no ranks tonight, remember?" she reminded him, before downing a shot.

"Sorry... SAM," he managed, though it felt odd to call her by her first name.

"No, actually I haven't been playing matchmaker. They found their way to each other all on their own," she informed him.

"They did? They have?" he stared at her open-mouthed.

"Haven't you noticed that Daniel's been spending a lot of his off time on the mainland for the last few months?"

"I... no... Now that you mention it... Daniel and Kitah, really?" he glanced over at Daniel curiously.

Carter nodded and grinned conspiratorially. "Yep!"

"That's great!"

"What's great?" McKay asked as he sat down with them.

"Your dance moves, Rodney," Sheppard replied.

"Yes, well... Logan has been kind enough to teach me a few steps," he grinned.

"And it SHOWS," Sheppard raised his beer to McKay.

"Care to take a spin, Sam?" McKay asked, extending his hand to her.

Carter smiled up at McKay. "Don't mind if I do." Sheppard watched the two of them saunter out to the dance floor.

Daniel handed Logan over to Teal'c and led Teyla back to their table.

"Work up a thirst, Daniel?" Sheppard asked.

"Yep!"

"I am thirsty as well," Teyla announced, grabbing a fresh bottle of beer from the table.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, can we clear the dance floor for a few minutes, please?"

Couples began leaving the floor as the stage lit up. "As you all know, tonight is Karaoke night..."

"Oh my God..." Daniel and Sheppard groaned simultaneously.

They were all surprised when McKay got up and tried his hand at karaoke, choosing to sing his own version of Elvis' "Are you Lonesome Tonight?" which was clearly directed at Carter. He did surprisingly well, managing to actually stay on key, and Carter was suitably impressed.

But they were all floored when a tipsy Logan took the stage and brought down the house with Whitney Houston's "Queen of the Night." Daniel and Sheppard were the only ones present who KNEW that Logan could sing, but even they had been blown away by her uninhibited song and dance.

Lorne looked over at Daniel and shook his head. "Tell me why it is you couldn't make it work with her?"

Daniel shrugged and took another swig of his beer.

Sheppard's amusement began to fade when he noticed several men blocking her way as she tried to return to their table. "Uh-oh..." he said, getting to his feet.

"What?" asked McKay, Daniel and Lorne.

Teal'c, too, got to his feet, his eyes locked on Logan across the room. "It would appear that those men have become quite taken with Logan Devane."

"I'm sure that happens a lot," Beckett quipped, earning him a sharp glare from Sheppard.

"You have no idea..." Sheppard and Daniel replied simultaneously.

"Should we not intervene, John Sheppard?" Teal'c asked.

"We should, but... Let's see how she handles it."

"Why?" asked McKay.

"Because if it's something she can deal with on her own, she'll get pissed off at us for interfering and that'll ruin a perfectly nice evening," Sheppard explained.

"He's right," Daniel said.

They all watched as Logan politely declined offers to buy her a drink or to share a dance while gingerly making her way toward their table. Unfortunately, one of the men was not inclined to accept "no" for an answer. He reached out, grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her roughly against him.

"Okay, that's enough!" Sheppard announced, already heading in Logan's direction.

Sheppard, Daniel, Teal'c, Lorne, McKay and Beckett hurriedly made their way across the floor to where the man was trying to bump and grind Logan into submission.

"Should we not also attempt to help?" Teyla asked Carter.

"Not a good idea... It'll just escalate the situation."

Logan had managed to free one hand long enough to land a good smack right across her accoster's face. He was so intoxicated that he just laughed it off and told her that he liked his women spunky.

Sheppard tapped him on the shoulder, smiling benignly as he turned around.

"What?" he growled. "Get in line!"

"Sorry friend, but the lady here is with us," he informed him, indicating his entourage behind him.

"Finders keepers, man. You let her go, now it's my turn."

"I do not think so," Teal'c countered, glowering darkly at the intoxicated man.

"Let go of me!" Logan snapped at him.

"You heard the lady," Sheppard's smile faded and his eyes became cold and steely.

"Don't make this worse than it has to be," Daniel warned.

"Aw, let him have some fun!" Someone shouted from the other side of the dance floor.

"What's it going to be?" Sheppard asked, never taking his eyes off the man.

He looked around at the men surrounding him. The big guy with the hat could definitely take him all on his own, but there was something in the other man's eyes when he spoke that sent a chill down his spine.

He released his hold on Logan and stepped back a pace. "Whatever man... Didn't know she belonged to anyone. You should keep a tighter leash on her instead of letting her act like that in public."

That was enough to really piss Logan off. She reared back and punched the guy squarely in the face. The surprised man hit the floor from the force of that punch, never having guessed that someone so small could pack that kind of power.

Sheppard grabbed Logan and pulled her away. "Easy Sparky... Let's not start a riot," he warned.

Some of the other men grumbled and growled for a bit, having wanted a chance to spend some time with her after her performance onstage. But they eventually calmed down and no further show of force was necessary.

Sheppard called Beckett over, to have a look at Logan's hand. He examined it carefully before announcing that nothing was broken. "But you're going to be feeling it in the morning, love," he warned.

"Maybe we should call it a night?" Sheppard asked.

"No!" Logan cried. "Come on, Johnny, I'll be good... No more singing, I promise."

"No table dancing either?" he teased.

"Wait..." McKay raised his hand. "I'd like to see that!"

Carter smacked him upside the head.

"Not a chance, Rodney," Sheppard growled.

Several hours and many drinks later, they closed down the bar with no further incidents. Shuffling and stumbling to the hired limo, they climbed in and instructed the driver to drop Logan and Sheppard off at his father's house, before proceeding to the hotel where the rest of them were staying. They thanked the others for a 'lovely evening' before getting out of the limo. Logan clearly didn't have her sea legs, so Sheppard scooped her up in his arms and carried her to the front door.

Carter smiled drunkenly as she watched them go. "You know... Those two would make a great couple..."

The following day, a VERY hungover Logan and Sheppard saw off the equally hungover members of their Pegasus family as they headed back to Cheyenne Mountain for the return trip through the gate. They didn't envy their friends the trip. Gate travel could be rough enough sometimes, but with a hangover? They didn't even want to think about it!

With a little over five weeks of leave still remaining, and virtually nothing to do by way of closing up the house, Logan and Sheppard decided to do some traveling around the country. Their first stop had been San Francisco, where they took in a college football game at Stanford University and a 49ers game the following day. Then they traveled down the coast to visit some old friends at Vandenberg Air Force Base.

While it was nice to see old friends again, they felt somewhat disconnected from everything. When they toured the base, they couldn't help but find much of the technology somewhat... dated? Of course, they had spent years in Atlantis, working with far more superior technology, so they were a bit spoiled. They let none of this show, of course, but it still felt... weird, and they were grateful to be leaving that evening on a flight back east.

O'Neill had called them to inform them that their presence had been requested at the White House to meet the President.

"Of the United States?" Logan asked.

"Last time I checked," O'Neill snickered. "Oh, and kids?"

"Yes, sir?"

"Don't do that weird twin thing with him, okay? It might freak him out a little."

They laughed at that and promised to get to Washington the following day.

President Hayes greeted them warmly in the Oval office and took a few snapshots with them. A small luncheon had been set out for the President, O'Neill, Logan and Sheppard, so they could lunch in peace and speak privately about all matters Pegasus. He listened attentively while Sheppard and Logan told him, in detail, about their experiences with the Wraith and others in the distant galaxy. They emphasized the importance of maintaining a strong presence there, to protect the other human worlds as well as to guard the gateway back to Earth against any threat of Wraith infiltration.

He assured them that he understood the importance of doing just that, and assured them that he would make sure that any President who succeeded him would understand it as well. He praised the efforts of all the men and women who served there and their many accomplishments, including the discovery of more ancient cities and the wealth of technology it brought them.

"But, aren't you ready to come home yet?" he asked.

"NO SIR!" O'Neill rolled his eyes as they chimed in together.

"Well," Hayes chuckled. "You seem to be very sure about that."

"We have a lot of work to do still, sir." Sheppard said.

"In fact, I'm surprised you haven't paid us a visit, to see for yourself what we do there," Logan added.

"Is that an invitation?" Hayes grinned.

"Yes, sir... Not that you NEED one."

"Well, I have been wanting to..." he began. "And definitely before I leave office."

"We'd love to have you, anytime," Sheppard assured him.

"I'll let you know."

After lunch, O'Neill bid them goodbye before they were given a tour of the White House and then taken on a whirlwind tour of the city. They were both still trying to get used to the idea that they didn't constantly have to be on alert for the threat of some imminent Wraith attack. But they did their best to relax and just be civilians for a while. It wasn't easy, of course. The petty bickering and overly dramatic squabbles of every day life seemed so small in comparison to what the two of them knew was 'out there.'

From Washington, they took a plane to New York, where they were soon bound for Coney Island. A few rides on a ferris wheel might help them reconnect with some of the joys of civilian life.

Three weeks into their vacation, Sheppard began acting... weird... secretive, even. One morning, he slipped away before Logan woke up, leaving her a note letting her know that he'd be right back and not to worry. Then he was strangely evasive when she casually asked him about where he'd gone. She was curious, but she trusted him completely, so she let it drop. That evening, when they were having dinner in the secluded cabin they'd rented in Lake Tahoe, Logan found out what Sheppard had been up to.

All the classic seduction elements were there, not that he *needed* them, of course, but it was nice to have him make such an effort at wooing her. Candlelight, wine, soft music... he'd even bought her a sophisticated, yet sexy new dress to wear for dinner AND he'd donned a tuxedo! She'd giggled delightedly when she'd come downstairs to find her devastatingly handsome lover all dressed up and holding a dozen red roses meant for her.

Dinner was marvelous, catered by one of the best restaurants in town. She had to wonder why he was going to so much trouble to spoil her this way, when she would have fallen into bed with him at the drop of a hat anyway. Something was definitely up. They danced for a while, after dinner, and drank more wine. Logan was just about to suggest that they adjourn upstairs when Sheppard pulled her over to the overstuffed chair in the corner and sat her down. Her eyes widened in astonishment as he dropped to one knee and took her hands in his.

"I've been doing a lot of thinking about... us..." he began. "And about what my father said..."

He reached into his vest pocket and pulled out a sparkling diamond ring. Her eyes filled with tears and her entire body trembled.

"Logan... I love you so much. I always will. You are my heart and my soulmate. Will you please... marry me?" The way he looked at her, with so much love and respect in his eyes, any small doubts and fears were instantly swept away. She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately.

He pulled away reluctantly, to catch his breath, and looked into her eyes. "So...is that a 'yes'?" he asked.

"Oh, sorry! Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes, YES!" she laughed.

Sheppard slipped the sparkler onto her ring finger, then lightly kissed her hand. "I know we have a lot to work out, but..."

She put a finger to his mouth. "I don't care about that right now. All I care about is that we're together. We're here, in this wonderful place... Free to express ourselves however we want... I love you so much, John... And I would be honored to be your wife."

He leaned forward, taking her in his arms and kissed her passionately. If they'd been skirting the rules up to this point, by becoming lovers, they were downright flouting them now.

TWO DAYS LATER

On a windswept cliff, overlooking the San Francisco Bay, Logan and Sheppard exchanged wedding vows in a sunset ceremony witnessed only by the preacher, his wife and a lone guitar player. Logan was dressed in a simple yet sophisticated beautiful white satin gown, with a crown of pink baby roses on her head, while John wore a traditional black tux. The preacher's wife acted as both witness and photographer. Though they knew they could never share those photographs with their friends back in Atlantis, they nevertheless wanted to have them, to show to their children one day. The vows they took were a mix of traditional and personally written ones. Each one leaving the other in tears. The exchange of rings proved to be bittersweet, knowing that once they returned to duty, they could not wear their rings any longer. But still, they had them, and the symbolism lived on in the hearts and minds of the happy couple.

At the end of the ceremony, Logan threw her bouquet off the cliff, letting the flowers catch the wind as they scattered and eventually fell into the Pacific below. They had another two weeks vacation to spend as their honeymoon, though they both already felt as if they'd been honeymooning all along.

As the two drove up the California coast, they chatted happily about the wonderful life they had ahead of them.

"You won't be able to take my name..." Sheppard said, somewhat disappointed.

"Maybe not the way things are now... But, that's okay," she assured him.

He glanced over at her curiously. "It is?"

"Yes. I don't NEED your name, I have your heart."

Sheppard grinned. "That you do... And I have yours."

"Forever," she whispered, leaning over to place a light kiss on his neck.

"Careful, Sparks...We don't want to spend our honeymoon in the hospital!" he teased.

She laughed and rested her head on his shoulder. Neither of them could remember a time when they were happier than they were right now.


	29. Chapter 29

A few days into their honeymoon, Logan and Sheppard visited a winery in Northern California. They wanted to bring back some gifts for their friends and thought wine might be just the ticket. As soon as they pulled up to the main building, something set off both of their radars. There was nothing overtly suspicious happening outside, but they knew better than to ignore it when their guts were screaming at them.

"What do you think?" she asked.

Sheppard shook his head and reached into the glove compartment, pulling out a handgun that had been issued to him at the SGC. "I don't know... Something just doesn't feel right."

Logan patted her purse, indicating that she, too, had her handgun with her. Sheppard got out and came around to her side to open her door for her, trying to look as casual as possible. Logan scanned their surroundings for any sign of trouble, but there was none. Numerous people were scattered about the grounds, in tasting rooms, or the sales offices, some where just touring the facility.

"Shall we tour?" she asked.

"Best way to get a good look, I guess."

They fell into step with a few other people who were just starting out on the tour, smiling amicably, and pretending to be simple wine enthusiasts. Midway through the tour, when they were beginning to feel somewhat foolish for thinking anything was amiss, something set Logan's back up again. Scanning the area once more, she noticed one of the outbuildings about thirty yards from where they were standing. She couldn't be sure, but she thought she saw someone duck inside, armed with a gun. Nodding casually to Sheppard, he glanced over to the building she indicated. He saw two men who, to his eye, looked to be standing guard. He saw no weapons, but he recognized the body language.

"We have to get in there," she whispered.

"Uh-huh...But we can't shoot our way in."

"Lost tourist schtick?"

He nodded. "Might work."

He took her hand and followed the rest of the group until they disappeared inside one of the tasting rooms. Then they ran over and crouched down behind some shrubs, checking to see if anyone had seen them detach themselves from the group. One of the men who'd been standing guard outside the small outbuilding had disappeared inside.

"Well," Sheppard began. "We can handle the one outside easy enough, but we don't know how many are inside."

"Good point. Um... honey?" she looked up at him.

"Yes?"

"Do you think we should try and call someone?"

"Like?" he shrugged.

"General Landry?"

"Sweetie, we don't even know what's going on here... Might just be drug-runners or something..." he pointed out.

"I...don't...think...so..." she countered, her eyes suddenly widening in shock.

"What?" he turned to follow her line of vision, but he still didn't see anything.

"That guy... John, he's got a zat!" she whispered harshly.

"What?!"

"Look, when he turns again, look at the waistband of his jeans."

Sure enough, as the guy turned around, he could clearly see the outline of a zat clipped to his belt.

"N.I.D. or Trust maybe?" she wondered aloud.

"I thought they were disbanded."

"Yeah, well...It just takes one to start them up again," she griped.

Sheppard pulled out his cell phone and placed a call to General Landry. He quickly explained the situation, telling him that they weren't sure how many or what group they were attached to, but that they had advanced weapons. Just as Landry began to question him further, his cell phone went dead. Logan pulled hers out, but she couldn't get a signal either.

"What now?" she asked.

"We have to get more intel..." he murmured.

"Agreed."

"You ready?" he asked.

"Ready."

He quickly pulled her close and planted a kiss on her lips. "Stay close, babe."

"You betcha snookums!" she teased back.

They easily overpowered the guard outside, knocking him out with his own zat. Sheppard tied him up with his belt and left him under a large bush next to the building. Quietly easing the door open, they quickly stepped inside and closed the door behind them. It was dark inside, but their eyesight soon adjusted and they were able to make out the interior of the room. There were no furnishings, save for a desk and a couple of chairs over in the corner. They made their way over to the other side of the room, where there was another door. Listening intently, they could make out no sounds, other than a strange humming noise that Logan found familiar. Sheppard motioned for her to stand on the opposite side of the door, while he opened it and checked for any sign of movement. Luck was with them so far. No one moved nearby and they didn't hear any voices.

"Cover my six?" he whispered.

"My pleasure, dear," she quipped.

Sheppard grinned lasciviously. "And when we're done, I promise not to take my eyes off yours!" he whispered.

"Promises, promises..." she motioned him on ahead of her.

There was a stairway a couple of feet ahead of them. With Sheppard in the lead, they slowly made their way down the stairs. The hum grew louder and the walls of the stairway were vibrating. Something told Logan she should KNOW what it was they were walking into, but...

"Kree!"

They froze as they heard the sharp command echoing from down the hallway at the bottom of the stairs. Sheppard glanced over at Logan curiously and mouthed "Kree?"

"It can't be..." she whispered.

"What?"

"Not here..." she shook her head.

"What?"

"That humming..."

"Logan... sweetheart... Please?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

Suddenly the door at the end of the hall opened and ten large men walked out, followed by a tall, dark, and (grudgingly admitted) handsome man. Logan gasped at the sight of him, and muttered, "Aw, crap!"

They quickly had to plaster themselves against the stairway wall to avoid being seen by the passing group. Sheppard hadn't missed the incredulous look in her eyes when she saw the last man, who appeared to be the leader. Once they'd passed and things grew quiet again, Sheppard pulled her farther back up the stairway.

"You recognized that guy...?"

Logan nodded, looking alternately pissed off and somewhat concerned.

"Who is he?"

"John... I don't know how or why, but that was... Ba'al!" she told him.

"Ba'al? As in foot-BALL?"

She shook her head seriously. "As in Goa'uld System Lord Ba'al."

"I thought Daniel said they'd been wiped out."

"But not completely... Teal'c and Bra'tac had Ba'al in their sights after the replicators were destroyed by the ancient weapon on Da'kara, but he was able to ring to another ship and escape... I don't know how he managed to get here undetected, but he must have come here to hide, knowing that Earth was the safest place to hide."

"Great... So he's one of those... what did O'Neill call them? 'Snakeheads'?" he asked, his gut churning at the thought.

Logan nodded. "We need to find out what he's doing here."

"Let's go..." Sheppard whispered, making his way back down the stairs.

They moved around the underground facility undetected for a good twenty minutes without learning much. They'd found the source of the deep humming that reverberated throughout the facility, a Goa'uld power generator, as Logan had suspected. They hadn't seen Ba'al again, since that initial sighting. They weren't sure if that was good or bad. Whatever he was doing here, Ba'al HAD to be up to no good. After all, he was BA'AL.

Since they were unable to determine what his plans might be, they figured that they might as well get out while they could, and let Landry know what they'd discovered. They began to make their way back to the stairway and had almost made it when a door suddenly opened directly in front of them and one right behind them. With only one zat between them, they knew they couldn't fight their way out. Logan's heart sank when she saw Ba'al walk through the door toward them. Though it had been several years, she knew there was no way he wouldn't recognize her. Sheppard eased in front of her, trying to use his body as a shield.

"Major Logan Devane, isn't it?" he smiled darkly. "It has been some time since last we met."

"Ba'al," she nodded. "It's actually Lt. Colonel now."

Sheppard looked at him oddly. "Do they always sound like that?" he whispered.

"Yes," she whispered back.

"Are you going to introduce me to your..." smirking smugly. "...protector...?" Ba'al asked.

"Allow me to introduce MYSELF... Lt. Colonel John Sheppard."

Ba'al looked at Logan. "Am I supposed to be impressed?"

"You should be," Logan replied.

"And why is that?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Just take my word for it, trust me."

"Tell me, _Lt. Colonel_ Devane... Are you still with the SGC... You don't appear to be in... uniform," his eyes caressed her appreciatively.

"In a manner of speaking," she replied. "What have you got going here, Ba'al. Don't tell me you've given up your delusions of achieving galactic domination to... sell wine?"

"Hardly."

"How did you get here? And why Earth, of all places?" she prodded.

"How did I get here...? I have my ways. And why Earth? Why not Earth? I believe you call it... hiding in plain sight?" He hazarded a disdainful glance at Sheppard. "Your friend here isn't very talkative."

Logan laughed. "You wouldn't say that if you really knew him."

"If that is so, perhaps HE would like to explain what the two of you are doing wandering around my facility?"

"He wouldn't," Sheppard said.

Ba'al stood and stared at Sheppard thoughtfully. "There is something about him that reminds me somewhat of... O'Neill."

Sheppard smiled. "Why, _thank_ you!"

"That was _not_ a compliment, I assure you."

Sheppard shrugged. "Nevertheless..."

"So tell me, Ba'al... How did you get all these Jaffa to follow you? Don't they know about..."

"Silence!" he bellowed, cutting her off.

"They don't, do they?" she smiled wickedly.

"What don't they know? That the Jaffa are fr..." A sudden zat blast silenced Sheppard before he could finish his sentence.

Logan dropped to her knees beside Sheppard and glared up at Ba'al. "That wasn't necessary!" she snapped.

"Perhaps not, but it was extremely satisfying," he smirked. "Now then... What shall we do with the two of you?" Ba'al asked.

"How about you just let us walk out of here?" she suggested.

Ba'al laughed. "And why would I do that?"

"Out of the goodness of your heart... hearts... whatever," she ventured.

"Well, that IS a change, Colonel Devane. I seem to recall that you once accused me of not HAVING a heart."

"Did I? Well, I always make it a point to see the best in... someone. I'm sure you've... grown... a lot since your near death at the hands of Anubis... and then Teal'c... What do you say we just call it even?" she batted her eyelashes at him.

It hadn't escaped his notice that she'd manuevered herself into a position where she could stand protectively over her fallen comrade. "I think we both know better than that, Colonel."

"Now see, there you go proving General O'Neill right... _again_. I was all set to give you the benefit of the doubt, but..."

"Tell me, my dear...The protective stance you've taken over your friend here. Is it out of concern for a fellow warrior, or something more?" he interrupted her

Logan shrugged, struggling not to show even the slightest hint of panic. "You know us crazy Tauri, Ba'al..."

"Yes, what is that ridiculous code of yours...? You never leave your people behind?" he asked.

"Very good."

"Very foolish."

"Potayto - Potahto..." she shrugged.

"Tell me, how long before a rescue team swarms over my little operation here?" he asked.

"Time being relative...?" she checked her watch, "Could be any time now."

"You always work in teams of four, where are the other two of your unit?" he glanced around as if expecting them to appear at any moment.

"They're around here somewhere..." she bluffed.

"Well then, it would seem prudent that we should prepare to evacuate this facility before your friends arrive."

"Where are we going?" Sheppard croaked weakly.

"Welcome back, Colonel Sheppard," Ba'al smiled grimly. "You will be staying behind, but Colonel Devane here... She will be accompanying me on my ship."

"I don't think so," they said in unison.

"I beg to differ... Although... Yes... Perhaps I should take you both," he mused thoughtfully.

"What changed your mind?" she asked, trying to stall for time.

"I thought to save this surprise for later, but... We have been working diligently to restore the Goa'uld to their rightful place in this galaxy. That you should happen upon my operation at this precise time is most fortuitous."

"Because...?" Sheppard asked.

"The infant Goa'uld we have been breeding have been too young for implantation... until now."

"What is he saying?" Sheppard whispered to Logan.

"I'm saying I have at least TWO who ARE ready to take a host..." he replied.

"Well, we've kind of got our hands full with our own lives right now, Ba'al, don't really see how we can take on anyone else's, so we'll have to decline your... uh... generous offer," Logan said.

"I'm sorry... Was I giving you the impression that either of you had any choice in the matter?" he grinned malevolently.

Ba'al ordered his Jaffa to prepare for evacuation, making sure they understood that the tank containing the infant Goa'uld was to be well-guarded and transported to his ship first.

Logan helped Sheppard to his feet, never taking her eyes off of Ba'al. "We will fight you on this, you know that?"

"I'm counting on it, my dear. I shall find it most entertaining," he nodded.

"I wouldn't be too sure of that if I were you," Sheppard said.

"He's right. Part of the reason the Goa'uld were defeated was your arrogance... your overconfidence... and the fact that you underestimated the human race," Logan pointed out. "I thought you were different than the others."

"Trust me, I _am_. And they are gone but, here *I* am," he smiled.

"Then _act_ like it, Ba'al," she shook her head at him. "I've always thought you were smarter than them. Prove me right."

He grinned widely at her. "Oh please... do explain."

"Yes, you're smarter than any of them were. And I don't mean just intellectually. You're savvy in a way they never were. You recognize the value of humans..."

"On occasion," he nodded.

"You even _like_ us," she added.

" _Some_ of you," he shrugged, staring pointedly at her.

"Let us go," she told him. "Work with us, not against us."

"Your superiors would just as soon toss me into one of those appalling penal facilities and let me rot until I die of old age, rather than work for me."

" _With_ you, not _for_ you," she corrected him.

He grinned wickedly. "Potayto-potahto."

Suddenly the ground started shaking. They could hear the sounds of charges going off above them.

"Secure them!" Ba'al shouted.

Sheppard grinned wickedly. "That would be the cavalry!" he announced, elbowing the Jaffa holding him in the ribs.

Logan hit the one closest to her and tried to reach the zat he'd taken from Sheppard. Another Jaffa moved in and clubbed Sheppard over the head with his staff weapon, knocking him to the ground. He was still conscious, but barely, and in no condition to fight. Logan stopped struggling and kneeled on the floor next to Sheppard.

"Separate them!" Ba'al ordered. "Take him to the transporter with us, and have her follow shortly thereafter."

"NO!" Logan screamed as Sheppard was dragged away, still trying to kick his way free.

Despite the fact that she was virtually half their size, it still took three Jaffa to contain her. Just as they were about to zat her, another blast occurred right above their heads, knocking the Jaffa to the floor. Logan wriggled out of their grasp and, grabbing a zat that had skidded across the floor, she took off after the ones who'd taken Sheppard. Logan could hear the sound of gunfire and staff blasts behind her as she ran to catch up with the Jaffa carrying Sheppard. She could also hear the telltale sound of transport rings being activated somewhere ahead of her.

"No!" she cried out and ran faster.

Ba'al had already ringed out and the two Jaffa holding Sheppard were just stepping into position on the platform when she burst into the room. Her first shot took out one of them, but the other one had already activated the rings before she could shoot him too. He fell just as the rings appeared, blocking her way to Sheppard. Her last picture of him was of him slowly sinking to the floor, barely conscious.

"NOOOO!" she screamed as the light flashed and the three of them were transported out of the room.

Logan frantically searched for the ring controller when a group of ten men burst into the room behind her.

"Freeze!" one of them ordered.

Logan rolled her eyes and raised her hands above her head. "Listen to me Lieutenant!" she barked. "I'm Lt. Colonel Logan Devane, you can check with your superiors. I'm one of the ones who called you in here. My ID is in my back pocket, I'm going to reach for it..."

"Slowly... And show me your tags!" he ordered.

She reached into her back pocket and pulled out the tiny wallet containing her military ID, then she reached into her shirt and pulled out her tags. "I don't have a lot of time, Lieutenant, so make it quick!"

Lieutenant Holt looked at her tags and then at her ID. "Very well ma'am. Can you tell me what the situation is?"

"In a nutshell, Lieutenant. Lt. Colonel John Sheppard has been taken captive by the enemy and we're going to go get him back!"

"Where... And _who_ is this enemy?" he asked.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you, so just follow me and do as I say!"

She located the controls and ordered five of the men to stand with her on a circle imprinted on the floor. She told the others to secure the building and wait for instructions.

When Sheppard appeared on Ba'al's ship he had enough presence of mind to grab the two zats carried by the Jaffa with him. There was nobody present in, what looked to him, to be a cargo bay, but he was sure that others would be coming soon. He hid behind some crates and waited, trying to give his throbbing head a chance to clear. He knew Logan would be along soon, provided she hadn't been retaken by more Jaffa. His heart sank when he saw that two more Jaffa entered the bay and ran over to check on their fallen comrades. But, as soon as they dragged the men off the transport platform, the rings lit up again, throwing them backwards. Sheppard took advantage of the distraction to step out and fire both zats at them before they could react. He turned to aim at the newcomers who'd just transported in, and was surprised to find a contingent of soldiers, from Earth, surrounding Logan on the platform.

"HOLD!" Logan ordered as five weapons were simultaneously pointed at Sheppard. "This is Colonel Sheppard." she informed them.

"Hi guys...Nice of you to join me." he quipped.

"Where the hell are we, ma'am?" Holt asked.

A sudden slight, momentarily dizzying shift occurred in the area around them, screwing up their equilibrium for a few seconds.

"What was that?"

As out of it as he was, Sheppard knew exactly what it was. "That, gentlemen, was this ship going into hyperdrive."

"What?" Holt asked.

"Aw crap!" Logan exclaimed.

"No kidding," Sheppard agreed.

"Ma'am?" Holt called to her again.

"Okay... Here is the short version. The enemy we're facing is not human, as I'm sure you could tell by the men you were fighting down on the surface."

"The surface, ma'am?"

"Yes. You are now onboard a space ship, traveling through a hyperspace window to... God knows where. Now we need to take control of this ship and get ourselves and hopefully a few prisoners, back to Earth.

"Back to Earth? Ma'am are you sure you're feeling okay? Did you get hit in the head, too?" he pointed to Sheppard, indicating the trickle of blood down the side of his head.

"I'm fine, Lieutenant, now snap to! We're in a very serious situation here!"

"I think she's right, Lieutenant," called out Sergeant Walker.

He was standing near a small window, looking out. His eyes were round with fear and amazement.

"What kind of ship is this, Colonel Devane?" Sheppard asked.

Logan looked around quickly. "Not sure. It's not big enough to be a mother-ship and I think the Prometheus would have detected that anyway."

"Wouldn't the Prometheus have detected us when Ba'al opened the hyperspace window?" Sheppard asked.

"Yeah...I'm sure they'll be following us, but we need to stop this ship."

"Okay..." he grinned. "Point me in the right direction."

"Not _you_ , Colonel," she shook her head vehemently.

"We don't know how many Jaffa are onboard," he argued.

"Not your problem, Colonel. You're in no condition to fight, so you're staying put."

"But..."

"No!" she barked. "Lieutenant Holt?"

"Ma'am?"

"I need one man to stay here with Colonel Sheppard and watch our six. The rest of you will be coming with me."

"Where to?" he asked.

"I'm familiar with these ships, Holt, and depending on which model it is, I know about where the main power source is... We knock that out, stop the ship, and then hold off any Jaffa that come along until the cavalry arrives."

"Jaffa?"

"That would be the enemy, Holt. The same guys you were fighting on the surface."

Logan began digging through the crates stored against the wall until she found what she was looking for. Quickly distributing the wepons, she explained what they were and how they worked.

"We call these 'zats'. You might have called them 'ray guns' when you were kids, but these are very real. One shot knocks them out, a second shot kills. Now, the powers that be are going to want to interrogate these guys, so let's try just to immobilize them if at all possible, especially their leader, although, you should know that he is likely to be protected by a personal shield."

"Like a force-field?" one of them laughed.

"Exactly," she smiled grimly. "I know this is hard for you to believe, but everything I've told you is the truth. We've been fighting these guys for a long time."

"Any questions?" she asked.

All of them chuckled nervously at her obviously rhetorical question.

"I think the questions can wait until we're in control of the ship, Colonel," Sheppard smiled.

"Okay, everybody clear on what we have to do?" They all nodded. Logan pulled the soldier aside who was staying behind with Sheppard.

"You don't let that man out of your sight, Sergeant. He is vital to the security of our planet. Do I make myslef clear?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Alright, let's move out!" she ordered.

Sheppard grinned and watched the five of them steal out of the cargo bay together. He rarely had an opportunity to just WATCH Logan at work, but it never ceased to amaze him how incredibly competent she was. These soldiers had no concept of what it was they were facing, but Logan's cool, confident demeanor had instilled immediate confidence in them as far as her ability to lead them. She was one of the most kick-ass soldiers he'd ever had the privilege of working with, and he was bursting with pride at the realization that he was married to this exquisite creature.

Sergeant Deeds looked over at Sheppard's smiling face. "She's... uh... she's really something, isn't she, sir?"

Sheppard nodded affirmatively. "She's one of a kind, Sergeant."

"So...we're really onboard an alien space ship, traveling through space?"

"That's right."

"And you two have been doing this for a long time?" he gaped at Sheppard.

"Yep."

"That's...uh... incredible, sir."

"You have NOOO idea, Sergeant."

TWO LEVELS DOWN**********************

Fortunately, for Logan and her men, there weren't many Jaffa around as they crept quietly through the ship. Ba'al must have left most of them behind when he bailed out on his operation. However many he had left, she knew he would have them guarding the most vital systems of the ship. Sure enough, there were about ten of them standing guard over the entrance to the main power generator. Logan quickly and quietly instructed her men about the best strategy to take all of them down, without having them raise the alarm.

On a count of three, the five of them jumped out, firing their zats as they did. All ten were taken out in a matter of seconds, without any of them being able to fire off a shot. Logan led three of them inside and placed the other two at the entrance, in case any more Jaffa came along. It had been several years since Logan had even been on a Goa'uld ship, but she thought she remembered which crystals would shut the drive systems down without shutting down life support or opening up a door while they were in space.

She carefully removed three crystals and the ship immediately decelerated and came to a complete stop. Then she also pulled the crystals powering the weapons systems, so they wouldn't have any way of fighting back once the cavalry arrived.

"We're going to have company soon!" she warned them. "Let's get ready."

Logan hid the crystals, so that even if the Jaffa managed to retake the room, they would still be unable to power up the drive systems again. Her men spread out, taking cover behind whatever they could find, but where they could still see the door.

"Company!" Green shouted from the doorway.

Within moments, they were trading fire with three Jaffa who'd come to check on why the ship had suddenly stopped. It took several minutes, but the five of them finally managed to knock out the Jaffa. Logan instructed them to bind them securely before they woke up, or any of their friends came to help.

They repeated the same process three more times, and had taken out a total of fifteen Jaffa. They had no way of knowing how many more were on board, so they simply held their position and waited. Sooner or later, she knew Ba'al would have to show himself unless he wanted to be stranded there with no way to escape from the sure to be in hot pursuit, Prometheus.

Ba'al sat in the pilot's chair on the main deck, silently fuming. He couldn't believe that a mere TWO humans could overpower his Jaffa and take control of his ship. TWO! And one of them a WOMAN! The Tauri had been a thorn in his side for far too long. He wanted to go down to the control room and crush the life out of them, but Ba'al was not stupid. He was outnumbered now, with his Jaffa captured or killed. He hadn't outlived the other System Lords by acting on his emotions rather than common sense. He had to find some way to reroute the controls to his location and get the ship moving again before the Tauri could catch up to him.

Logan and her men had been waiting for almost an hour, with no sign of Ba'al or any more Jaffa. As much as she wanted to go and find him, she knew they couldn't leave the control room unguarded. That would be precisely what Ba'al wanted.

"This Prometheus you talked about...?" Holt asked.

"Yes?"

"Any idea when we can expect her?"

"Not really," she admitted. "Tracking another ship that has gone into hyperspace isn't as simple as reading a radar console, Lieutenant. They'd have to calculate exactly where we opened a window and then plot our presumed trajectory. They don't want to overfly us, run right into us or even take the wrong course altogether. It'll take some time for them to get it just right."

"But... they WILL, right?"

"Yes, they will... In the meantime, it looks like there's a secure hold a couple of doors down from us. We should start taking these Jaffa in there before they wake up enough to put up a fight. Only two men, the rest of us will stand guard to make sure Ba'al doesn't find a way in here."

Two soldiers took the Jaffa, one by one, to the secure hold where they were locked in to prevent them from escaping their bonds and rejoining the fight for the ship.

"What kind of weapons does this Ba'al have that we should worry about?" Holt asked.

"It's a little hard to explain. He's got a device, that wraps around his hand... It's capable of blowing someone to bits or knocking them off their feet... Sort of a mega shockwave type... thing..."

"Okaaaay..."

"Trust me, you don't want to mess with him."

"And we can't fire back because of his personal... force-field."

"Right."


	30. Chapter 30

PEGASUS GALAXY*********

"What?!" Caldwell barked incredulously.

"I don't know what to tell you, Colonel. We haven't found them yet, but we're not giving up." O'Neill assured him.

"How the hell did they end up on a Goa'uld ship in the first place?"

"They apparently stumbled on an operation Ba'al had going under a winery in Northern California. One thing led to another and voila! They're on his ship."

Caldwell looked over at Weir in total exasperation. "What part of 'You're on LEAVE' did they not understand?"

"You know them, Colonel... If they saw a threat, they'd go after it," Weir reminded him.

"I'll let you know as soon as Prometheus gets a bead on them," O'Neill promised.

"Thank you, General. We appreciate it."

Caldwell shook his head and walked away. Weir waited a moment then followed him to his office. "I'm sure they're fine," she said.

"Fine is a relative term when it comes to those two..." he replied.

"True. But it doesn't sound like there were too many Jaffa on board that ship. Most of them were trapped on the surface when Ba'al bailed out."

"Tail between his legs..." Caldwell muttered.

"Between Logan, Sheppard and the five others she took with her, I'm sure they managed to get the upper hand."

"Those five men were from a local Air Base... They have no experience dealing with Goa'uld or Jaffa or space ships..." Caldwell grunted.

"But Logan and Sheppard _do_. They're both strong leaders...You KNOW this..." she reminded him

Caldwell nodded. "I know."

"But you're still worried?"

"Elizabeth, you missed the part about what else Ba'al was carrying with him on that ship."

"What?"

Caldwell's jaw tightened. "A whole vat full of infant Goa'uld, just ripe and ready for implantation into new hosts."

"Oh my God!" Weir gasped.

MILKY WAY GALAXY***

The Prometheus crew was operating on full alert. The ships' sensors were finely tuned to the slightest hint of anything that might be *out there,* not just a Goa'uld cargo ship.

"Anything yet?" Colonel Collins asked.

"Not yet, sir. But we're sure this is the way they went. We should be able to pick up on where they might have exited hyperspace."

"I want a close watch on all the sensors people. We don't want to miss them," he ordered.

Sheppard kept wavering between consciousness and unconsciousness. That blow to the head really did a number on him. So far, they'd seen no sign of any Jaffa or Ba'al, for that matter. But they also hadn't heard from Devane either. The sergeant took some measure of comfort in the knowledge that, had she and the others been captured, the cargo bay would have been overrun with Jaffa by now. He was really starting to worry about Colonel Sheppard's condition, since he seemed unable to stay awake. It was killing him to just sit there and wait, but his training would allow him to do nothing but follow his orders.

Logan and the others were getting fed up with the waiting game as well. If the Prometheus didn't arrive within the hour, she was going to order her men to take the bridge and deal with Ba'al themselves. She was somewhat consoled by the knowledge that Ba'al had to be as incredibly bored as she was.

Holt had been trying to find a way to bypass the ship's communication systems so they could speak to Sheppard without Ba'al overhearing, but he'd been unsuccessful so far. Just as she was on the verge of calling up Ba'al herself, she felt the slight tremor associated with another ship exiting hyperspace in close very proximity to them.

Logan hurried over to the window, straining to catch sight of the other ship and was immediately rewarded with a stunning view of the Prometheus. She whooped and called out to the others.

"Game-time boys! It's the cavalry!" she said, pointing out the window.

They whooped back and took turns getting a look at the flagship for Earth's defense. Appropriately awed and impressed, the men quickly fell back into formation and braced themselves for the showdown. Holt opened up the communications system just as Prometheus began hailing the Goa'uld ship. Ba'al had not responded to the hail, but Logan decided to answer them herself.

"Prometheus, this is Lt. Colonel Devane on board the Goa'uld ship."

"Colonel Devane, this is Colonel Collins onboard Prometheus."

"Nice of you to join us, Colonel," she teased.

"What's your situation?" he asked, all business.

"Not to give too much away here, Colonel, but we have secured the main control room and disabled both the drive and weapons systems. We have no idea how many Jaffa are on board, but we have neutralized quite a few. The location of Ba'al is unknown, so we are understandably reluctant to surrender our foothold in the control room until he has been found and neutralized."

"What about the shields?" he prodded.

"We can take them down for you... now that you know we're aboard and you won't be blowing us to bits." Logan pulled the control crystals for the shields and handed them to Holt. "Done. You're free to board anytime, Colonel."

Down in the cargo bay, they heard the conversation between Logan and Collins, as she'd no doubt intended. Sheppard was awake now, barely, but he had his zat ready and aimed at the doorway. A few moments passed and then the door slid open. Knowing it was too much to expect that it would be men from Prometheus, but still disappointed anyway, they watched as Ba'al slipped into the cargo bay. His face was a mask of rage as he began heading over to a crate directly across from them.

"Fire!" Sheppard croaked.

Ba'al raised his shield, warding off any blasts they threw at him and continued to fumble with the crate. All they had to do was hold him here until help arrived, and prevent him from somehow escaping. They watched as Ba'al finally wrested the lid off the crate and reached inside to remove a second lid from a container neither of them could see. Although he'd never actually seen a Goa'uld before, Sheppard's blood ran cold when Ba'al lifted out a small, reptile-like creature and turned to face them with a wicked smile on his face.

"Aw, CRAP!" Sheppard muttered.

"What the hell is _that_ , sir?"

"Bad news, sergeant... VERY bad news. Whatever you do, don't let that thing get near you... Don't let it touch you..." Sheppard warned.

"Perhaps all is not lost after all..." Ba'al proclaimed, and then hurled the Goa'uld directly at them.

Sheppard immediately fired on the symbiote while it was in mid-air, but Ba'al lobbed another and another. Deeds frantically began firing at the wriggling creatures but missed both symbiotes.

"Remember what I said, Deeds! Don't let them anywhere near you!" Sheppard hollered.

"You can't hit them all, Colonel!" Ba'al informed him as he lobbed three more in their direction.

He then broke and ran for a small ship on the other side of the cargo bay. Unable to take their eyes off the symbiotes, Sheppard and Deeds had to let him go. Sheppard took out one more symbiote, and Deeds took out another, leaving three unaccounted for. As Sheppard turned to look behind him, he saw one of the symbiotes fly across the room directly at him. He raised his zat to fire, though he knew he would be too late.

A sudden flash of light crossed before him and he watched in shock as the Goa'uld fell to the floor at his feet. He shot it again, for good measure and turned to look over his shoulder. Logan was standing in the doorway, taking aim at another symbiote. She fired and the thing fell to the floor near Deeds. Then she spun suddenly and fired over Sheppard's left shoulder. The last symbiote fell and became still.

"I love your timing, Colonel!" Sheppard called out.

"Where's the tank?" she asked.

"The what?"

"The tank... The vat with the rest of them in it!" she clarified.

Sheppard pointed to a crate behind her. "There!"

"Pick up the others," she ordered her men.

They reluctantly picked up the slimy reptilian creatures and dropped them into the vat with the others. Logan took a step back and fired her zat directly into the tank once, twice and then a third time. the entire thing disintegrated. She looked back over her shoulder and winked at Sheppard.

"Can't have some mad scientist trying to experiment with those things," she explained.

"Hell no!" he agreed. "I take it the cavalry's here?"

"Yep!"

They were interrupted by the sound of a ship blasting out of the bay.

"Ba'al?" she asked.

"Ba'al," he nodded.

"Shit!" she muttered. "Well, let's get you back to the Prometheus," she said, stepping over to help him get to his feet. "Gentlemen?" she called out to Holt and Deeds.

Each of them took one of his arms and helped him over to the ring transporter. A dozen men, wearing Prometheus insignia entered the cargo bay as they stepped onto the platform.

"Lieutenant Gibbs? Would you be so kind as to notify the good Colonel that we're ringing aboard with Colonel Sheppard and that he needs immediate medical attention?"

"Yes ma'am," he replied.

A moment later, Sheppard was being whisked off to the Prometheus sick bay, followed by Logan. She ordered Holt and Deeds to follow Airman Forbes to the bridge where they would receive further orders from the commander of the Prometheus.

Logan waited outside while a doctor examined Sheppard and took X-Rays and an MRI. Now that the immediate danger was over, she could feel the anxiety bubbling just below her cool exterior. She'd never been afraid for herself, but for Sheppard who, she feared, could very well have suffered a fractured skull. Back in Atlantis, Beckett never would have considered keeping her out of the exam room, but she knew better than to even try to pull that here. Soon, Colonel Collins arrived to introduce himself and inquire about Sheppard's condition.

"Haven't heard anything yet, Colonel. What about Ba'al?" she asked.

Collins shook his head negatively. "He went into hyperspace almost immediately upon escaping the other ship. We could either try and chase him or stay here, secure the ship and help you people."

"Speaking on a strictly personal level, Colonel, I think you made the right choice," she sighed.

Collins chuckled at that. "I agree. I have to say, you're remarkably calm for someone who's gone through what you've just been through," he noted.

Logan shrugged. "Aw well, you know... Just another day in the life..." she quipped.

The doctor came out and Logan turned to him apprehensively.

"Well, he's fortunate he's got a really hard head..." he began.

"You have _nooo_ idea," Logan murmured.

"There's no fracture, but he's going to be off his feet for a while."

"May I see him?" she asked.

"Of course."

She turned to look up at Collins. "Colonel?"

"I'll just poke my head in long enough to introduce myself. We can talk later."

She led the way inside and stopped at Sheppard's bedside. He smiled broadly when he saw her, then sobered somewhat when he caught sight of Collins.

"Lt. Colonel Sheppard, this is Colonel Collins, commander of the Prometheus. Collins, Lt. Colonel Sheppard of Atlantis."

The two shook hands and chatted amicably for a few moments before Collins excused himself to return to the bridge. When they were finally completely alone, Logan leaned down and kissed him deeply. Sheppard pulled her down onto the bed with him, cradling her tightly against him.

"You okay?" she asked.

"Yeah...You?" he whispered.

"I am now..." she murmured, burrowing into him.

"So that was a Goa'uld..."

"Mmm-hmmm..."

"Damned creepy."

"Mmmm-hmmm..."

"I think Ba'al had a bit of a thing for you," he joked.

"Really? I thought he was more into you!" she countered.

"You think there's any chance that word of this DIDN'T get back to Atlantis?" he asked.

"Slim to none."

"Crap..." he groaned.

SGC INFIRMARY FOUR HOURS LATER

Sheppard awoke to find General Landry looking down at him.

"Welcome back, Colonel Sheppard."

"Thank you, sir," Sheppard winced slightly.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Like my head was caught between a rock and a hard place, Sir. Other than that, I'm peachy."

"Good." He looked over at Logan. "Nice work, both of you."

"Thank you, sir."

"I believe all the credit goes to Colonel Devane, Sir. I was more or less stationery for this one," Sheppard informed him.

"Your modesty is refreshing, Colonel. Now, can you tell me how the hell you two managed to stumble upon Ba'al's little underground operation?" Landry demanded.

Sheppard and Logan exchanged a glance and shrugged simultaneously. "Dumb luck?" they said in unison.

Landry shook his head. "Can you be more specific?"

"Honestly General, we were just looking for some wine to take back to Atlantis as gifts. We had no idea when we got there that... well, you know... Colonel Sheppard happened to see some guy standing by that little outbuilding and noticed that he was carrying a zat. Since that's not something the average winery worker generally carries around, it piqued our..."

"Concern..." Sheppard finished for her.

"You can imagine our surprise when we ran into Ba'al," Logan said.

"Yes, I can," Landry nodded his agreement.

"Apparently he was trying to single-handedly rebuild the Goa'uld population himself and set himself up as overlord... or something," she shrugged.

"We didn't find any more symbiotes in that underground complex, or anywhere else on the ship you seized from Ba'al, so we think it's safe to assume that the ones you destroyed were the only ones he had."

"I sure hope so, Sir," she shuddered involuntarily.

"Yeah... Can't say I was happy to make their acquaintance..." Sheppard likewise shuddered.

"No one ever is, Colonel Sheppard," Landry chuckled.

"And not an experience I care to repeat..." he added.

"I think we have our hands full enough with the Wraith, Sir. Mind if we leave the Goa'uld to you folks here?" Logan asked.

"Fair enough. I understand Colonel Sheppard will soon be back on his feet. We've notified Atlantis that you have returned to Earth, safe and..." at Sheppard, "...relatively sound. But you've got over a week left of your leave, so I suggest you don't tour any more wineries with the time you have left?"

"Understood Sir," they replied in unison.

"Doesn't that drive Colonel Caldwell a little crazy?" he looked from one to the other and back again.

"All the time, Sir," they chuckled.

"I'll see you both back here when your leave is up," he grinned, shaking his head.

"Yes, Sir," they replied.

Dr. Lam came in and asked Logan to excuse them while she examined Sheppard, prior to his release. She smiled agreeably and excused herself to go and chat with a few old colleagues. Dr. Lam was nice enough, but Logan still felt weird about being in the infirmary without Janet Fraser being there. It had been years since her death, but she and Logan had been close, and Logan still missed her.

The rest of their leave was blissfully uneventful. They traveled some more and did much shopping as well as taking lots of pictures to show those back home who had never been to Earth. The day before they were to leave, Logan and Sheppard packed up the treasures they'd collected for everyone, taking special care to securely package the two urns containing his parent's ashes for the trip to Atlantis. They sent everything ahead of them to the SGC for clearance.

That night, Sheppard took Logan out to an exquisitely romantic and elegant restaurant for dinner and then, surprisingly, dancing. They drank champagne and toasted to their new, albeit secret, life as a married couple. When they returned to their hotel room, Sheppard scooped her up in his arms and carried her over the threshold.

"Haven't we already done this part?" she asked, giggling.

"Sure we have, but not at this hotel..." he replied and then kissed her gently.

Her heart skipped a few beats when she pulled back to look into his eyes. All the love he felt for her was there. The love, respect, and desire. Logan wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder.

"I love you, John," she murmured softly.

"I love you, too, Sparks."

The following morning, they packed up the rest of the rest of their personal possessions and were ready to leave by the time the car arrived to take them to Cheyenne Mountain. They were immensely happy to be going back home, but just a little sad that they would have to resume sneaking around to hide the true nature of their relationship. They would have to be extremely careful once they returned. It hadn't taken long for the two of them to slip into typical "couple behavior" while on vacation, and it was so nice to be able to reach out and touch him anytime she wanted, without fear of repurcussions. Logan sighed wistfully as she admired the view she had of Sheppard bending down to pick up some papers he'd dropped.

"Hey vixen! You start THAT again, we're gonna miss our ride to the base _and_ have a LOT of explaining to do!" he teased.

"I think this is the only thing I'm going to miss about being here..." she murmured as he came over to nibble on her neck.

"Same here," he agreed. He looked down at her hand as he pulled it up to his lips and kissed it softly. "You ready?" he asked.

"No... But we have to, right?" she smiled gamely.

"Unfortunately. I keep hoping they'll change the regs someday... SOON..." he sighed.

Logan took his hand in hers, turning it to expose his wedding ring. She kissed him fervently, while tugging gently on the ring to pull it off his finger. She placed in his open palm and then watched as he looked down at it before pulling the chain out of his shirt and releasing the clasp. He slid the ring onto the chain that held his tags, closed the clasp and tucked it back into his shirt.

"Right next to my heart," he whispered softly.

He pulled her to him again and kissed her while he eased her wedding ring off her finger. She pulled back to look up at him, her own eyes mirroring the sadness in his. Sheppard pulled out her chain and slid her ring onto it as he'd done with his, then tucked it back into her shirt.

"Didn't think it would be that hard," she said.

"Me either... You sure you're okay with this?" he asked.

"Yes," she said firmly. "These rings are just symbols. The true commitment we share is right here," placing her hand over her heart. "No one can ever take that away from us."

"No way, no how," he agreed.

The phone rang warning them that their ride had arrived. Sheppard kissed her once more, passionately, before helping her to her feet. "Don't know for sure when I'll have a chance to do that again..." he grinned.

"I love you, Flyboy," she murmured.

"I love you, Sparky."

ONE HOUR LATER

Logan and Sheppard stood at the bottom of the ramp watching as the gate dialed.

"I think I like our gate better," Sheppard whispered.

"You like the way it lights up and sparkles."

"You calling me a little kid?" he eyed her suspiciously.

"You betcha!"

Sheppard grinned and shrugged. "Just checking."

Both of them snapped to attention when General Landry entered the gateroom.

"I trust you're both rested and refreshed?"

"Yes sir," They replied.

Landry smiled and shook his head. "Good. I hope you don't have too hard a time getting back in the swing of things...Although judging by what happened a few weeks ago, I doubt that'll be a problem."

"Probably not, sir," They answered together.

"If you two ever get tired of working in Pegasus, just let me know. We'd be happy to have you back here at the SGC."

"That won't be any time soon, sir," Sheppard replied quickly.

"What he said, sir," Logan added.

"I figured as much, but the offer stands."

The wormhole connected and the three of them watched as two airmen moved their crates up to the event horizon.

"We're clear, sir," Walter called from the control room.

"Well, I know they can't wait to have you back, so I won't hold you up any longer," Landry said, shaking hands with each of them. "Come pay us a visit anytime."

"Thank you, sir," they said in unison.

They waited for the airmen to push the crates through the event horizon, gave one final wave and stepped through. Smiling faces greeted them on the other side.

"Welcome home Colonels," Caldwell said.

"Thank you, sir!" they replied, grinning happily.

"Welcome home," Weir greeted.

"Good to be home," they said.

"So...What exactly IS all this stuff?" Caldwell asked.

"Presents!" they replied.

"Well, mostly. Some of it is personal stuff. If someone can take these to our quarters, we'll go through them and disburse everything properly." Sheppard added.

"That was nice of you..." Weir was cut off by the sudden blaring of a proximity alarm.

The four of them looked up at the control room as people immediately took their positions at various consoles to get a reading on what had set off the alarm.

"We've got incoming!"

Logan and Sheppard dropped their belongings and headed for a nearby weapons locker. They grabbed a couple of P-90's and a handgun each, then met up with Weir and Caldwell in the control room.

"Where?" Sheppard asked.

Deegan pointed to the screen in front of him, indicating a single bogey.

"Wraith?" Logan asked.

Deegan nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

"But...how?"

"Maybe they're just a scout?" Weir asked.

"Possibly...With our cloak, they wouldn't be able to see us, but depending on the range of their sensors..." Caldwell trailed off.

"They might have picked up the Daedalus before they could cloak." Sheppard finished for him.

"Open a channel to the Daedalus for me, Deegan."

"Channel open, sir."

"Daedalus, this is Caldwell."

"We were expecting to hear from you, Colonel." It was Hermiod speaking.

"What's your status?"

"We have engaged the ship's cloak and have altered our orbit. We do not yet know if we have been detected by the Wraith ship's long range sensors, but all fighters have been manned and stand ready."

"We'll keep an eye on them from down here, but let me know as soon as you have visual contact with the Wraith ship."

"We will do so, Colonel. Daedalus out."

"Do you think our cover's been blown? Why the hell would they even be out here?" Sheppard asked.

"We always knew there was a possibility that our cover would someday be blown. It's not like we haven't had run-ins with them all over the galaxy for the past few years...I'm surprised our cover wasn't blown a long time ago." Caldwell said.

"Yes, but...Just knowing we're in Pegasus doesn't mean Atlantis is still standing...As far as they're concerned, I mean." Logan pointed out.

"We have made a point of spreading disinformation about the location of our base, just in case the Wraith got their hands on any of our allies...That ship is headed straight for us here, not towards the closest planet to us..." Sheppard added.

"Let's just hope it IS a scout and that it DOESN'T know we're really here."

"The cloak IS working still, right?"

"Yes, John... In fact Hermiod was just checking it out last week as part of our routine maintenance," Weir assured him.

Caldwell looked at Logan and Sheppard. "If you're up to it, Sheppard, I'd like for you and Colonel Devane to have a squadron of jumpers ready to take off, should we need them."

"Not a problem, sir!" they replied in unison.

They each grabbed a radio set and headed up the stairs to the jumper bay. Sheppard keyed his mic and ordered a squadron to meet them in the bay in full combat gear. Weir and Caldwell watched them go and then shared an almost amused glance.

"Things were so quiet while they were gone..." Weir murmured.


	31. Chapter 31

The city of Atlantis held its collective breath as the Wraith ship drew closer with each passing moment. It never wavered from its path: heading straight for the Lantean world. The jumper crews were loaded and ready to move at a moment's notice, but Caldwell had issued strict orders that no one was to give away their position until and unless it looked like the Wraith KNEW they were there. Like those in the city below, the Daedalus crew watched and waited as the ship finally came within visual range. A Wraith supply ship, not a hive vessel. Crews had been alerted on the other outposts in Pegasus to be on the lookout for increased Wraith activity and also to maintain radio silence with Atlantis, to avoid giving away their location. Likewise, a message had been sent to Earth NOT to contact them until they heard the "all-clear" from Atlantis.

In the meantime, the city sat silent, as though at slumber, on the surface of the ocean. Tension mounted as the supply ship slowed, then stopped, assuming orbit above the planet; though not directly above the city itself. It looked like the city's cloaking device was operating as it should, since the Wraith ship hadn't taken a position near them. It was a safe bet that they were scanning the surface of the planet for any sign of human life or technology, but as long as the cloaking devices, both in the city and on the mainland, were operating as they should, the Wraith would be able to detect nothing. It had been because of these cloaks, and the ZPM technology they'd mastered, that they'd been able to fool the Wraith into believing that the city of Atlantis had been destroyed in the siege against them years before.

While the Wraith knew that the humans from Earth remained in the galaxy, they did not yet know WHERE they had taken refuge. Nor had they learned of the other Ancient cities they'd discovered. The Lanteans had the knowledge and ability, especially with Hermiod's help, to construct new cloaking devices, but they still didn't want to lose the advantage that their carefully constructed, and heavily guarded cover story afforded them. And they certainly didn't want that cloak to fail just as a Wraith ship was hovering over their planet.

Minutes turned into hours until, finally, six hours after settling into orbit above the planet, the Wraith ship pulled slowly out of orbit and began moving away. When they had reached sufficient distance, a hyperspace window opened up and the ship disappeared. Scarcely daring to believe that they were really gone, Caldwell and Weir were slow to lift the alert they'd been under for most of the day. Caldwell cautiously opened a channel to the Daedalus.

"Are you getting anything else?" he asked Hermiod.

"Nothing, Colonel. It appears that they have, indeed, departed the region."

"Good to hear. I suggest the Daedalus remain cloaked for the time being though, just as a precaution."

"Understood, Colonel. Daedalus out."

"You didn't have enough excitement back on Earth, you have to bring it here?" McKay complained.

"You know we always like to make a big entrance, Rodney," Logan shrugged.

"And people call ME melodramatic!" he scoffed.

"We missed you, too, Rodney," she assured him.

"Okay people, let's focus..." Caldwell said, calling the meeting to order.

After their meeting, Logan and Sheppard were inundated with questions about their vacation and the people back home. Both of them promised to fill everyone in on what they'd done and the places and people they'd seen once they had a chance to decompress. That evening, Logan and Sheppard unpacked and sorted through everything they'd brought with them from Earth, dividing up who would deliver which item to whom. Their efforts were hampered by the same thing that always happened when they were alone for more than ten minutes: They ended up in bed together, managing to accomplish nothing more than a good workout and blissful exhaustion.

About an hour or so later, they were finally able to tear themselves away from each other long enough to finish the task at hand. With the exception of two crates that were slated for the mainland, each of them took their treasures and sought out the intended recipients. Logan knocked on Caldwell's door and was ecstatic when he answered it, holding young Samuel in his arms. Sam squealed upon catching sight of his Godmother and began bouncing in his fathers' arms.

"Lolo!" he squealed, reaching out for her to take him.

"Sammykins!" she cried, taking the boy into her arms and twirling around with him.

"Lolo!" Samuel repeated happily, snuggling into her embrace.

"I missed you, little man!" she informed him.

"Miss you too, Lolo!" he said clearly.

"A lot," Caldwell added. "You just gonna stand out there in the hall, or would you like to come in?" he grinned.

Logan smiled up at him. "I'd like to stay for a bit, if it's all right?"

"Of course," he smiled.

Logan leaned towards him and kissed him on the cheek. "Missed you, too, by the way," she told him.

Caldwell never noticed when he closed the door, that someone had been watching their exchange from the shadows. Someone who was very unhappy with the scene she'd just witnessed. Someone who could be very dangerous when crossed.

Sammy was immensely pleased with the new toys Logan and Sheppard had brought for him, less so with the clothes since, Caldwell informed her, Sammy was going through a phase where he detested wearing clothes for some reason. Lyta had been put through her paces, trying to keep the Colonel's son properly attired in public. Logan stayed to cuddel and play with the boy for longer than she'd intended, but it was so hard to pull herself away from the little guy.

"You look great," Caldwell told her.

"Thanks!" she smiled.

"I guess your vacation agreed with you, then... Except for the episode with the Goa'uld?"

Logan winced and shook her head. "Totally unintentional, I assure you."

Caldwell laughed out loud, causing Sammy to look up at his father and laugh, too, though he had no idea what they were laughing at. "I take it you guys kept a low profile after that?"

"Absolutely!" she chuckled.

"It's really good to have you back," he said seriously.

"You have no idea how good it is to BE back," she smiled happily at him.

"You were still afraid they were going to keep you there?"

"Especially after the thing with Ba'al... It isn't that we hate... Earth... funny how we don't call it home anymore... It's just... Well, YOU know, Steve."

Caldwell nodded. "I do."

"I guess everything was pretty quiet around here while we were gone?"

"For the most part... Kolya's been throwing a hissy fit since you left, though," Caldwell laughed. "He doesn't believe that you were gone... thinks we've been keeping you away from him for some reason."

"Oh brother!" she shook her head. "What does he want with me anyway?"

Caldwell looked her in the eye. "You know the answer to that, Logan."

"Lolo..." Sammy babbled at the sound of her name.

"Not really, no."

"He has a... thing for you," Caldwell informed her.

She looked up at him in shock. "Did he SAY that?"

"No, not outright, but the way he's been acting... It's pretty obvious."

She winced and made a face. "Yuck!"

"Ucky, ucky!" Sammy chirped.

"That's right, little man!" she got down on the floor and began tickling the boy, who howled with laughter.

"You realize I am never going to get him to sleep, don't you?" Caldwell growled at her.

Logan flashed him a breathtaking smile. "Godmother's privilege!" she informed him.

When she finally left, Caldwell's door was still being watched. The woman almost gave herself away when her anger nearly got the better of her at the sight of Logan and Caldwell embracing, then exchanging a quick kiss before she headed off down the hall.

Logan's next two stops were to see Beckett and Bates. They'd made a point of visiting with Beckett's mother and Bates' family to drop off letters written by both men. The families had been ecstatic to receive the visit and the letters and asked many questions about their loved ones. Bates' younger brother developed an instant crush on Logan, or so Sheppard had informed her. He'd sent Bates a basketball, autographed by his favorite NBA player along with a personal note thanking the marine for his sacrifices in defending the Country. There were also notes from his brother, aunt and uncle.

Bates thanked her profusely, for the personal items and for the bottle of scotch they'd brought him. He also shared some rather surprising news with her: he had developed a personal relationship with one of the women from Takada and had received permission to move her to the mainland to live with the Athosians, where it would be much easier for him to visit her while he was off-duty. Logan told him she was happy for him and hoped that everything worked out between them.

Upon entering the infirmary, where she knew she would find Beckett even at this late hour, she was greeted by a great big bearhug. She shared all the news she'd gathered from his mother, as well as the huge bottle of Scottish Whiskey they'd procured. Beckett thanked her and asked her never to leave him again for so long with such military brutes as they had in Atlantis without her to act as buffer. They talked for about half an hour and then she left to go and meet up with Sheppard, who was delivering a special gift to McKay. She arrived just as Sheppard did and they knocked on his door together.

"I was just beginning to think that the two of you had forgotten about me!" he sulked.

"Never!" they said in unison.

"Come in, come in," he said, stepping aside to let them enter.

"What's...uh... What's in the box?" his eyes were lit up like a kid at Christmas time.

"Just a little something we thought you might like..."

"Looks pretty big," his grin widened.

"That depends on your interpretation of BIG, I think..." Sheppard winked at Logan.

"We hope you like your gift, Rodney. It's kinda hard to know what to get the genius who has everything," she smiled.

"May I?" he asked excitedly.

"It IS yours!" they replied.

McKay tore into the box like a two year old, then jumped back as something inside moved of its own accord. "Whoa!" he cried out.

"There's nothing in there that'll hurt you!" Sheppard laughed.

They tried to contain their amusement as McKay, more carefully now, continued to open his package. McKay's eyes widened as he realized what it was that they'd brought him. What it was became even more apparent when it began *talking* to McKay. He reached in and pulled out what looked to be a pure white, fluffy snowball.

"A kitten...?" he said as a smile spread across his face.

"Don't worry, we had permission," Logan assured him.

McKay's smile grew even wider when he heard a second mewling sounding from deep inside the box.

"TWO kittens?!" he grinned pulling out a little grey snowball.

"Couldn't let the little hairball get lonely now, could we?" Sheppard chuckled.

"Wow... This is... this is _great_! Thank you guys!" he chirped happily. He hugged Logan and shook Sheppard's hand. "This is really great!" he said again.

"There are plenty of supplies in the box for them, Rodney. We'll leave you three to get acquainted."

"Oh... okay... Thanks again, guys!"

"You're welcome!" they said, leaving him there to play with his furry new roommates.

"You were right," Sheppard admitted as they made their way back to his quarters.

"Was there ever any doubt about that?" she countered.

"Not in my mind!" he assured her.

The following day, Sheppard and Logan had the crates slated for the mainland loaded up and ready to go. While she knew all the children would LOVe everything they had brought, she was less convinced that the Athosian adults would immediately warm up to the *gifts*.

"You're sure about this?"

"Sure I'm sure... mostly." Sheppard shrugged.

Once they touched down, they were mobbed by the Athosian children, not for the gifts, but because they were both genuinely loved by them. The gifts were merely an added bonus. The men helped to unload the crates and set them down in the center of the village for all to see. Several men were somewhat alarmed when they heard strange noises coming from inside the crates, but Sheppard assured them that all was well. The first crate he opened contained all kinds of sports equipment and games, which they promised to teach the excited children. The second crate, contained large bags of some kind of food, which they did not understand. They looked at Logan and Sheppard questioningly, but Sheppard held up a hand and said they would understand once the third crate was opened. The Athosians fell into a stunned silence as Sheppard opened the crate and began handing Logan cage after cage containing... animals of some kind, all of whom were yipping and howling.

Halling was the first to speak. "Colonel Sheppard?"

"Yes Halling, these animals are called 'dogs'...Puppies, really, since they're not full grown. There are several different breeds here, as you can see..."

"These animals are for... hunting?"

"Well, some dogs can be used for hunting, yes, but..." he trailed off when Logan grabbed his sleeve.

"I don't think that's what he means by 'hunting' John," she informed him.

"Oh! NO! These dogs are pets!" he explained. "Part of the family."

"Pets?" asked Halling.

"These are domesticated animals. The humans of our world keep them as part of their families, to love and to play with. Some use them for protection, or to help them hunt for food." Logan explained.

Then she took one of the puppies out of its cage and held the wriggling animal on her lap. The children instantly fell in love with the animal and jockeyed for position to come close and pet him.

"We thought you might enjoy having them here with you... You know, for the children?" Sheppard said hopefully.

"They are very... cute." Kitah said as she came forward to pat the puppy.

"I'm sure Daniel has told you all about the animals back on Earth," Logan smiled.

"Some," she admitted. "I do not believe he ever mentioned dogs or puppies," she giggled as the puppy licked her hand.

They stayed and showed them how to feed and care for the puppies, and how to play with them, before moving on to show them how to play with several of the games and sports equipment they brought as well.

By the end of the day, Logan and Sheppard were exhausted and more than ready to return home for the night. They bid the Athosians good night and promised to return soon to check on the puppies and to teach them some more games.

WEEKS LATER

Three weeks into their return from vacation, Logan and Sheppard almost felt as though they'd never left. It had been surprisingly easy to get back into their regular routine.

One thing that had been bothering Logan, however, was the constant presence of Dr. Camp. It seemed that everywhere Logan went, Dr. Camp was somewhere close by. The woman was a constant reminder of two episodes Logan would just as soon forget and put behind her. And to make matters worse, she was still looking for a way to procure samples of that damned horny blossom! They hadn't run into any of the shrubs anywhere else in the galaxy, so they were holding onto the hope that the shrubs she'd destroyed were, in fact, the ONLY ones that had existed. Kolya had pretty much confirmed that the Genii didn't have any, and they tended to believe him since his planet would have been in utter chaos if they did.

Logan had finally caved in and agreed to go and visit Kolya in his cell, though she saw no point in it. He'd been driving security crazy with his constant demands to see her, and she didn't want them to suffer any longer.

His face lit up when she walked through the door.

"Colonel Devane," he smiled.

"I understand you've been asking for me while I was away?"

"They told me you were away, but I didn't believe them."

"Why not? They have no reason to lie to you."

"Of course they do."

"That's part of the issues with you, Kolya. You have a real problem with trust."

"I should think you would understand that."

Logan shrugged. "Maybe at first, but you've been here for quite some time. Has anyone here ever treated you inhumanely?"

"That depends on your interpretation of inhumane."

"Have you been beaten? Shot? Tortured? Starved?"

"No."

"Then I would call that humane. You have received the finest accomodations any prisoner could possibly hope for. You are allowed to read, exercise, even watch movies. You receive three square meals a day, plus snacks... You have it MUCH better than anyone of us would receive from your people."

"I cannot argue with that," he admitted. "So, you really were away for so long?"

"I was. Colonel Sheppard and I returned to our homeworld for six weeks. Neither one of us has been back there for a very long time."

"I see. Yet you haven't come to see me since your return."

Logan studied his face for a moment. He looked almost... sad. "Why would you WANT to see me, Kolya? Aside from the fact that I killed your brother, I'm Lantean... A Tauri. You hate us."

"I do not hate you... Not all of you. I don't even hate Sheppard, which I'm sure you don't believe."

"Okay. What is it you wanted to see me about?"

"I thought we might talk. That you might try to explain to me again why my people are wrong to treat yours as enemies."

"Haven't we been through all of that?" she rolled her eyes at him.

Kolya chuckled. "Perhaps my time here has caused me to... re-think my position?"

"Has it?"

"As I said... Perhaps. Are you willing to sit with me and discuss it?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

Logan paced back and forth in front of the cell. "I'll let you know," she replied and then walked out the door.

ONE HOUR LATER

"Oh HELL no!" Sheppard barked.

Weir and Caldwell glanced over at Sheppard.

"If you make it an order, sir, you know I'll do it, but otherwise, I'm with Colonel Sheppard on this. I mean, why me? I'm no diplomat, far from it. If we're trying to get him, and eventually ALL of the Genii, to see the error of their ways he should be talking to someone like Dr. Weir or Daniel Jackson, not me."

Caldwell tried to cover a smile. "You know WHY he wants you, right?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah... He's attracted to me, yada, yada, yada, RIGHT! If that really were the case, then I am the LAST person who should be dealing with him."

"What she said!" Sheppard added.

"I don't disagree with you, Colonel," Caldwell assured her, prompting a surprised and relieved glance from both Sheppard and Logan.

"That said, however, we should keep our options open."

"Meaning?" she stared from one of them to the other.

"We'll see how well he relates to Dr. Jackson and Dr. Weir."

Logan looked over at Weir apologetically, "Sorry Elizabeth."

Weir smiled, "Not a problem."

"Let's move on to the next item of business..."

TWO HOURS LATER

Logan looked up at the control room in exasperation as Dr. Camp approached her and her team in full gear. Her heart sank as Caldwell merely shrugged in reply to her unspoken question.

"Do you even know how to USE that weapon, Doctor?" she asked.

"I know the basics, but I won't have to if I stick close enough to you, will I?"

"Just stick close to Bates, alright?"

Logan gave the order, and Bates, followed by Camp, Evans and Reed moved through the event horizon.

They spent six hours, searching through the ruins and countryside only to determine that there were no signs that any humans had inhabited the planet in the recent past. The ruins were interesting, anyway, at least they would be to Daniel Jackson. She lost sight, a few times, of Dr. Camp and had to send Bates to find the wayward doctor. She would be glad when the woman gave up her quest and returned to Earth PERMANENTLY. Before they left, Logan dialed the Genoa city to inform Daniel of their discovery so he could check it out whenever he had time. After that, Logan called it a day and took her team home.

When she arrived, Weir pulled her aside and asked her to have one final conversation with Kolya to reiterate the fact that Weir and Jackson would be the ones educating him about the Tauri-Lanteans and not herself. Logan readily agreed, happy that she didn't have to spend any significant amount of time with him.

Kolya seemed pleased to see her when she came in, but she did not return his smile.

"I understand you're less than pleased at hearing that Dr. Weir and Dr. Jackson will be spending time with you and answering your questions."

"I was hoping you would be the one to...instruct... me."

"I'm not a diplomat, Kolya, I'm a soldier. Did you spend YOUR time attending to diplomatic matters for the Genii?"

Amusement lit his face. "No, I can't say that I did."

"Then again, what do the Genii NEED with diplomats, they don't negotiate with other humans, nor do they even CARE about other humans, right?"

"Something like that." he agreed.

"In any case, both Dr. Weir and Dr. Jackson can easily answer any questions you might have, and far better than I possibly could."

"But, I don't enjoy spending time with either one of them, the way I do with you."

"As a prisoner, don't you think it's a bit much to actually EXPECT to enjoy anything?"

"Granted..."

"You and I really have nothing more to say to one another, Kolya. If you don't like Dr. Weir or Dr. Jackson then that's just too damn bad. I have much to much to do to be spending time trying to convince you that we're good people who should be your friends. Personally, I couldn't care less whether or not the Genii ever accept my people."

"And that is exactly the kind of honesty I find so...refreshing. Diplomats don't talk like that, and neither do I."

"Is that why you insist upon dragging me down here to deal with you?"

"I like you, Colonel Devane. May I call you Logan?"

"You may not. And you don't know me well enough to either like or dislike me, though I'm sure that given enough time you would find there is MUCH to dislike about me."

"I doubt that. I have always prided myself on being able to read people, and I think I've read you pretty well."

"Believe what you want, you will anyway. But, you're wrong about being a good judge of people, Kolya. You have GROSSLY misread MY people, as have your leaders. But that's your loss, not ours."

"I hold no illusions that you will return or share the... admiration... I have for you, but perhaps one day, you will see me in a more favorable light."

"I just don't see that happening, Kolya."

"I will meet with Dr. Weir and this Dr. Jackson, if that is what you wish."

"Good. I'll let them know."

She turned to walk out, but Kolya called to her again.

"You will come to visit me again, won't you?"

"Not if I can help it."


	32. Chapter 32

Caldwell stood on his balcony breathing in the fresh ocean breeze. Samuel played at his feet, racing his cars round and round the enclosed deck. He'd finally ditched that tiresome Dr. Camp and her unending questions! He smiled and looked down at his son, who'd begun running his toy cars up and down his leg. With Lyta and Torus visiting the mainland for the night, he was left to his own devices to entertain Sam for a change. He appreciated the rare opportunity, but part of him was still wishing they were here, too.

He was becoming attached to them, perhaps too attached, he thought. Torus was a great kid, and he was fantastic with Sam, who positively adored the older boy. Lyta was sweet and kind, a wonderful surrogate for the boy who'd never had a chance to know his mother. Perhaps it was just the amount of time they'd spent together, but Caldwell felt comfortable with Lyta around. He shook his head and cursed under his breath when he heard a knock at the door.

"So help me, God, it better not be..." opening the door, "... Logan!" his frown was instantly replaced with a broad grin.

"Better not be Logan?" she asked.

"Sorry, no... Come in," he said ushering her inside. "I was afraid you might be that Camp woman." he explained.

"Oh...Sorry to disappoint you!" she teased.

"Hardly!"

"LOLO!" Samuel toddled over to her.

"Sammykins!" she squealed, pulling the boy off his feet and whirling him around in the air.

"Lolo!" he giggled.

She stopped spinning him and hugged him tightly to her, covering his face with kisses.

"How's my big guy?" she asked.

"Good." he said simply.

"You, my darling boy, are a man of few words... Just like your father." she kissed him once more and set him down on the floor.

She watched him toddle back out to the balcony and resume playing with his toy cars.

"You guys batch-ing it tonight?" she asked.

Caldwell nodded, "Yep. Lyta and Torus are visiting the mainland tonight."

"I didn't mean to intrude, but I was missing the little guy and I just wanted to get in my fix of Sammy-kisses before I hit the rack."

"You know you're welcome here any time, Logan."

"Thanks... Steve, are you okay? You look... I dunno..."

Caldwell shrugged. "Tired, I guess. And annoyed."

"Dr. Camp?"

"Yeah...Has she been bothering you with all her questions?"

"Some. She mostly bothers you men...You know... Guess she needs a strictly male perspective for her research."

"As long as I'm not the ONLY man she's bothering." he growled.

"That bad?"

"The woman's relentless."

"Scientists!" Logan chuckled.

"Quiet woman, or I'll send her after you!"

Logan put her hands up signaling surrender. "I'll be good, I promise. But for now, I better get going... Sammy! Come kiss Aunt Logan!" she called.

Sam toddled inside once more and threw himself into her arms.

"Wuv you, Lolo..." he cooed sweetly.

"And I wuv YOU, little man." she sighed. "Be good for Daddy, okay?"

"N'kay." he replied.

Logan handed him to Caldwell, who followed her to the door.

"I meant what I said, you're welcome here any time," he said as he opened the door for her, Logan stepped into his embrace, hugging both him and Caldwell.

"I'm here for you too, Steve," she murmured and then kissed him softly on the cheek.

For a split second, as she began to walk down the hall, Logan had the feeling that someone was watching her. She stopped, looked over her shoulder and then continued on.

"Something has to be done," the woman muttered through clenched teeth.

The following week passed uneventfully enough. Weir and Caldwell were stuck in meetings together all week, going over budgetary issues. Daniel had begun *working* with Kolya, teaching him about the ways of the Tauri. Daniel agreed with her about the fact that Kolya held little, if any, sway with his people since his bitter failure to capture and keep the city of Atlantis, and even less after losing the ancient outpost a few months ago. However, he believed that if they could sway Kolya, of all people, then there would be hope of getting through to others of the Genii.

Though the Lanteans didn't necessarily NEED the Genii as allies, it was always nice to have an abundance of them out there. It would also be nice not to have to worry about a Genii strike force setting traps for them here and there. Both of their people had enough trouble just keeping the Wraith at bay without having to fight each other as well.

Late one evening, Logan found herself roaming, alone and restless, the halls of Atlantis. Sheppard was on a mission and she particularly feel like spending the evening alone in his quarters. She was lost in thought, marveling that no one had yet discovered their secret. They'd been fortunate enough that no one had come looking for either of them in the middle of the night. They spent every night, when they weren't off-world, together in one of their quarters. Yet, no one had seen either one of them leave the others' quarters in the mornings.

They made love wherever and whenever they could, but always with an eye toward caution against being discovered. Logan smiled to herself at the memory of Sheppard dragging her on jaunts to the mainland, ostensibly on recon missions. He would, in fact, place the jumper on auto-pilot, in hover mode and then drag her to the back of the jumper where they could ravage each other hungrily. It was the one place where they could be completely certain they were alone and safe from discovery. While it added a certain spice to their lovemaking, it also made it difficult to be spontaneous.

The sounds of music suddenly brought her out of her reverie and she walked over to the railing to see where the music was coming from. To her surprise, she saw Caldwell and Lyta...dancing! Torus and Sam were playing on the floor nearby, while Caldwell taught Lyta some dance steps. She stepped back so they wouldn't see her and continued on her way. Clearly the two of them had gotten far closer than anyone realized. As she thought about it, she realized that a relationship between the two of them made perfect sense. She was happy that the two of them were getting closer, and she hoped that they would eventually marry and be as happy as she and Sheppard were together.

As she rounded the corner at the end of the hall, Logan got that uneasy feeling that she was being watched again. This time she turned around and doubled back the way she'd come. She didn't see anyone, and the feeling passed. Shaking her head and telling herself that it was probably her own unease at having seen a private moment she shouldn't have, Logan quickened her pace and made her way back to her own quarters.

After she'd gone, a woman stepped out from one of the unused quarters and walked over to the same place where Logan had seen Caldwell and Lyta dancing together. They weren't dancing anymore, but they definitely looked cozy.

The following morning Weir stood at the bottom of the control room stairs to greet Sheppard and his team when they returned home. Suddenly, Weir began to weave unsteadily on her feet. Sheppard reached out to catch her as she crumpled and started to fall. Easing her gently to the floor, Sheppard barked orders for a medical team to be sent to the gateroom.

"Elizabeth? What's wrong?" he asked.

She mumbled something unintelligible to him in response as McKay knelt by her head and slid his balled up jacket under her head. A moment later the medical team arrived and whisked her off on a gurney. Logan heard the call for a medical team, and automatically assuming it was Sheppard who'd been hurt, she ran at full speed for the control room.

Upon learning that it was Weir, not Sheppard, she was alternately relieved (that it WASN'T Sheppard) and horrified that Weir had suddenly fallen ill. None of them were allowed in the infirmary while Beckett examined her, so the hallway soon became crowded with concerned friends and co-workers.

Twenty minutes passed, then forty, and still Beckett did not emerge. Sheppard encouraged Logan to try going in, using her status as a Med-Tech to gain access. Beckett saw her come in and waved her over.

"I don't know what's wrong with her, luv, I don't have any answers. She's exhibiting typical viral symptoms, but not any virus I've ever seen. We're doing every test I can think of here and I've already sent blood samples to Earth for analysis, but..." he trailed off.

"You'll figure it out, Carson, I know you will."

"Tell the others to go on about their business... I promise I'll call you when I have any answers."

"Are you sure I can't help?" she asked.

Beckett shook his head negatively. "I appreciate that, luv, but there's really nothing you can do."

Logan gave him a quick kiss and a hug before heading back out to the hall. She quickly relayed everything Beckett had told her and assured everyone that as soon as they knew anything they would send word about Weir's condition.

About six hours after Weir took ill, Caldwell burst into the infirmary, carrying a very feverish, very ill Lyta.

"What happened?" Beckett asked.

"I don't know... One minute she was fine, the next she was on the floor. It happened so fast..."

Beckett ordered him to stay out while he examined Lyta and assured him that he would tell him as soon as he knew what was wrong. Caldwell stood in the middle of the room, looking very lost and confused. That was where Logan found him. Taking him by the hand, she led him to a bench in the corner and made him sit down. She sat down and wrapped her arms around him. He sat there stiffly for a moment and then finally melted against her, burying his face between her neck and shoulder.

"Carson will help her, Steve, you know he will."

"I can't lose her, Lo... I can't... lose... another..."

"Shhhhhh, Steve... We're not going to lose her," she promised him.

Neither one of them made an effort to move, or even flinched as people came in and out of the infirmary and saw them together the way they were. It was a sight that didn't even seem to faze anyone. It was a well known fact that Logan and Caldwell served together at the SGC prior to either of them coming to Atlantis. They expected friends to comfort one another. There was only one person who glared at the sight of the two of them locked in each others arms. So focused was Logan on Caldwell that she failed to see the scathing look she received from across the room.

There was still no improvement the following morning, though Beckett had been able to keep both womens' fevers below a dangerous level. Logan had been scheduled to go to the mainland, but tried to beg off, only to be told by Caldwell that she should go get some fresh air and that he would be fine. Beckett had instructed him to get some rest and he promised to do so, as long as he could remain nearby.

Logan was completing her final pre-flight inspection when the room suddenly began to spin around her. She had a vague impression of a woman's face before everything went black. McKay, who'd been inside the jumper, heard her hit the ground and came out to see what happened.

"NO!" he cried and immediately went to her side.

"Logan? Logan?!" he got no response.

He picked her up and carried her out of the jumper bay, calling for someone to notify Beckett that he was bringing her in, and then for them to call Sheppard.

Beckett and two nurses were standing by when McKay burst through the infirmary doors cradling Logan in his arms. The panic in his eyes told them everything they needed to know: Her symptoms were the same as Weir's and Lyta's.

Caldwell appeared as McKay was setting Logan down on a gurney, the same panic mirrored in his eyes as he looked to McKay for answers.

"Where?" he asked.

"Jumper bay," replied McKay.

He squeezed between the two nurses and took Logan's hand in his.

"Are we looking at some form of contagion here, Doctor?" he asked.

Beckett shrugged in bewilderment. "Damned if I know. In some ways this thing is behaving that way, but if that were the case, why hasn't the city's sensor detected it and begun a lockdown?"

Caldwell stayed by her side as they wheeled her into an exam room, despite Beckett's order to leave. He leaned over and kissed her softly on the forehead, brushing her hair back off her face.

"Fight this, Logan. Do you hear me? You FIGHT!" he whispered in her ear.

"Colonel please, we've got to get to work on her!" Beckett complained.

Caldwell reluctantly left the room, his features a mask of pain. McKay was pacing restlessly back and forth when he came out.

"What'd he say?"

"Nothing... Just like Elizabeth and Lyta..."

The entire scene was played out in front of the one person who knew PRECISELY what was ailing the three women. The one person who, in fact, could cure them if she so chose. Her anger and jealousy burned hotter as she witnessed Caldwell's devotion to Devane. She'd been right, after all. Devane WAS the primary threat all along. She'd been thrown a little by all the time he'd been spending with Weir, and then when she saw him with the Athosian woman, Lyta. But his reaction to Devane taking ill told her that she'd been right all along.

She toyed with the idea of administering the cure to Weir and Lyta, though she was not THERE yet. But Logan Devane... How she hated that woman. She had from the first day they met. One day Caldwell would thank her for this. For freeing him from the influence of that horrible shrew. Not that she could ever actually TELL him what she'd done but, she knew that he would be grateful to have Devane out of his life forever.

She was startled from her musings when Colonel Sheppard barrelled into the room calling for Logan. Now that was a man who definitely wouldn't thank her for getting rid of Devane, though she was sure he SHOULD! How was the man EVER going to have a chance at a real romance with his childhood friend always standing in the way?! She made herself as inconspicuous as possible while continuing to watch Caldwell.

"What the hell happened?" Sheppard was shouting.

"It's the same thing that happened to Elizabeth and Lyta. We were in the jumper bay, getting the jumper ready and I just heard her... fall..." McKay choked up at the memory.

"Did she say anything?"

"No... she was out cold."

"Doesn't anybody know what this thing IS?" he asked.

"Not yet," Caldwell admitted sadly.

"I have to get in there," Sheppard announced and headed for the exam room.

"No!" Caldwell and McKay grabbed one of his arms each.

"She NEEDS me!" he argued.

"She needs Beckett right now. Let him help her!" Caldwell ordered.

"She's gonna be asking for me..." he protested. "I have to be there when she wakes up."

"You'll be right out here when she's ready to see you!" Caldwell barked.

"He's right Sheppard," McKay added. "If anyone can help them, Beckett can."

Sheppard stopped fighting, but he never took his eyes off the door to her room. Caldwell, McKay and Sheppard all sat silently on the bench and waited for word.

Beckett was somewhat encouraged when Logan began to show signs of fighting back. He stood over her and gently encouraged her to wake up.

"Come on luv, you can do it. Let me see those beautiful emerald eyes now," he cooed.

She mumbled something unintelligible in response.

"That's it darling, come on."

"John..." she croaked.

"He's right outside, luv."

"John..." she croaked again.

"Tell you what, gorgeous, you wake all the way up for me and I'll have him in here straightaway."

Logan moaned and shook her head. "Carson..."

"Yes luv?"

"Sleeve..." she croaked.

"Sleeve?" he asked.

"Uniform...sleeve..." she managed before falling unconscious again.

Beckett rechecked her vital signs to make sure her condition hadn't deteriorated, then he looked around the room to see where her clothes were put after the nurses removed them and put her in a gown.

"Gaby, where are her clothes?" he asked.

The nurse walked over to a chair in the corner and retrieved a plastic bag.

"Here now, be careful..." he took the bag from her.

"What are we looking for?" she asked.

"I'm not sure...She said something about her sleeve..." he replied.

Using a pair of tongs, he carefully pulled Logan's uniform shirt from the plastic bag and laid it out on the table. With a magnifying glass he began searching the fabric of her sleeves.

"Tweezers please," he called to Gaby.

She handed him the tweezers and he gingerly pulled what looked like a wooden sliver from near the cuff of her sleeve. He placed the splinter on a microscope slide and examined it closely under the microscope.

"It's just a sliver," Gaby observed.

"Aye...but maybe there's something ON the sliver..." he murmured. Beckett grabbed a plastic baggie and sealed the splinter inside. "Now listen to me, Gaby. Not a word to anyone about this, do you understand?"

"But..."

"No, not another nurse, not another doctor... I'll take care of getting this analyzed."

"You're not thinking that someone...deliberately..."

"It's a possibility," he admitted.

"Alright Doctor...I won't say anything."

"Good. Please stay with her... And I want to know if anyone shows an unusual interest in her clothes."

"Very well."

"And I'm sure I won't be able to keep him out for long, so it's alright for Colonel Sheppard to come in and sit with her."

"I'm surprised you were able to keep him out this long!" she smiled.

"You and me both," he shook his head.

As soon as Beckett left the room, Sheppard, Caldwell and McKay were all over him.

"How is she?"

"Can I see her?"

"Alright, alright, Colonel Sheppard, you can go in and sit with her, but try not to disturb her. She needs all her strength the fight this thing."

Sheppard immediately bolted through the door of her exam room.

"You KNOW something, don't you?" McKay asked.

"I may know something, but we have to keep this between us for now."

"What is it?" Caldwell demanded.

"Logan woke up long enough to mumble something to me about her sleeve."

"Her sleeve?"

"On her uniform...That's all she got out before she went under again. But I checked and found this..." holding up the baggie with the tiny sliver inside. "We need to get this analyzed, Rodney, now."

"A sliver?"

"Maybe there's something ON the sliver." Beckett explained.

"A toxin?" asked Caldwell.

"I dunno, Colonel, but we haven't come up with anything else so far, it's worth checking into."

"Agreed, but why are we keeping it quiet, unless..." his eyes grew round as the implication hit him.

"Someone might have deliberately poisoned them," Beckett whispered.

"Come on, let's get started on the analysis!" McKay took him by the arm and hurried him out of the infirmary.

Caldwell stood where he was as everything Beckett had told them sank in. Deliberate poisoning? Who? And WHY? The three women had very little in common. All of them were on friendly terms, of course, and genuinely seemd to like one another, but they weren't what one might consider close pals. Their various roles pretty much separated them: warrior, diplomat, mother... And though Weir was the co-leader of the city, Logan still mainly reported and answered to him, not Weir. He shook his head, unable to see any connection, then headed into Logan's room. Sheppard was sitting by her side, one hand holding hers and the other stroking her hair while he whispered words of encouragement.

"Has she regained consciousness again?" he whispered to Sheppard.

"Again? She woke up before?"

Caldwell nodded. "Beckett said she did." He pulled Sheppard to the far side of the room, since the nurse, Gaby was still in the room with them.

"She managed to get something out about the sleeve on her uniform before she passed out again. When he checked it, he found some... sliver... he thinks that might have caused her to get sick."

"A sliver?"

"Listen to me, and I need you to stay very calm; cause if you go flying off the handle I will have them drag you out of here and lock you up, are we clear?"

Sheppard nodded.

"Beckett suspects that there might have been something on that sliver that caused this...a toxin...poison...something. And that all three of them were deliberately targeted."

"What?!" he asked incredulously.

"He and McKay are analyzing it right now, but can you think of any reason why these three would have been targeted?"

"No, none...Who would want to...?"

"I can't think of any reason either. My first thought would have been Kolya, but since he's locked up tight and Lyta has been no where near him and neither has Logan, as far as I know. Elizabeth hadn't seen him in two days..."

"I doubt he'd hurt Logan, of all people, the creep's nuts about her... And where would he get something like that anyway?"

"As I said, it was just my first thought. As far as I know, we have no other enemies here."

"This makes no sense..."

"I agree. I'm going to check on Lyta and Elizabeth and then I'm going down to McKay's lab to check on their progress. I'm sure I don't have to tell you to keep an eye on her," he said, indicating Logan.

"No sir."

"I'm going to have Bates and Lorne, unofficially, keep an eye on Lyta and Elizabeth as well. I want to know if anyone tries to get close enough to finish them off."


	33. Chapter 33

Caldwell checked on Weir and then sat with Lyta for a while before going to check on Beckett and McKay's progress with the sliver they'd found. He noticed that Lyta's color seemed a little better, and the nurse told him that her fever seemed to be under control. After whispering words of encouragement and assurances that he would be fighting for her too, he kissed her softly on the forehead and hurried off to find Beckett and McKay.

Daniel, having heard through the grapevine what had happened, came bursting into Logan's room, startling Sheppard as he sat by the bed, resting his head on Logan's hand.

"How is she?" Daniel asked, frantic.

"The same," he replied wearily.

Daniel took up a position on the other side of the bed, taking Logan's free hand in his. He took in Sheppard's concerned expression and tried not to let his own panic show. "She's a fighter, you know that, John."

"I know."

"Do they have any idea what happened?" Daniel asked.

Sheppard looked around the room to make sure no one was listening. "They entertaining the possibility that all three of them were deliberately poisoned."

"What? Why? Who?!" he gasped in shock.

"No idea... yet. McKay and Beckett are checking out a sliver of wood they found on Logan's shirt, to see if there are any traces of toxins or a drug...This is supposed to be kept on the QT, alright?"

"Sure, sure...Has she woken up at all?"

"Once, that's how Beckett knew to check her sleeve," Sheppard informed him, gently rubbing Logan's hand.

"They'll find an answer, we _have to_ believe that."

"I know. And in the meantime, we make sure no one gets close enough to finish the job," Sheppard growled.

"You think they'd try?" Daniel arched an eyebrow at him, clearly doubtful given the security measures now in place.

Sheppard shrugged. "They were stupid enough to target her in the first place. Knowing that we... that * **I** * would move Heaven and Earth to find whoever it was that hurt her and..."

"And what you would do to them..." Daniel finished for him. "You're not alone in that, you know. There are lots of us who'd make someone pay for hurting her."

"I know," he eyed Daniel speculatively. "You're not still carrying a torch for her, are you?"

"No... I mean, not like _that_..." he stammered.

"I mean, I heard that you were kind of involved with Kitah..."

"I was... I am... But Logan first and foremost has ALWAYS been someone I cared about very deeply... "

"I understand... Logan feels the same way about you," Sheppard nodded.

"That's good to know. And since we're not about to let go of her... again... we're gonna find a way to help her beat this."

Logan could sort of hear the conversation between Daniel and Sheppard. The words were a bit muddled, but she could feel the love and support emanating from both of them. She couldn't speak or respond to them, though she struggled to do so. She was fighting the darkness threatening to overwhelm her with everything she had. She was fighting to hold on and not to give in to the heaviness weighing her limbs down. Their voices were her lifeline.

She continued to listen as Daniel spoke of times past and the friends and colleagues they'd lost over the years. As he spoke of one dear friend, in particular: Janet Fraser. Her mind went back to the time when Janet had still been alive and kicking. She remembered how hard it had been on Janet when she had to be the one to tell her about Daniel's radiation poisoning. She'd been on an off-world mission at the time and they'd been unable to recall her in time for her to get back before he ascended. Janet had told her that she was at least grateful that she'd been spared having to watch the man she loved be ravaged by the effects of the radiation he'd been exposed to. That she hadn't had to witness his suffering.

Janet had been such a source of strength to her then. Sheppard had been in Afghanistan, and had only been allowed to come home to attend Daniel's memorial service with her. Of course, General Hammond had generously given her leave and she'd returned to Afghanistan with Sheppard for a few weeks, so he could help her deal with her grief.

In her present state, Logan could actually *feel* the grief and loss she'd felt when Daniel died, just as vividly as she had when it first happened. Tears streamed from her eyes as she lay there, causing Daniel and Sheppard to wonder what was going on in her head, or if she was in pain.

In her mind, Logan relived the pain of losing Janet, again, to a Jaffa staff weapon. The feeling of helplessness as she fought to bring her back from the brink of death, all the while she and Daniel were dodging staff blasts themselves. It had been no use, of course. The initial blast had nearly killed her instantly. By the time she made her way to where Daniel was now tending to two injured comrades, Janet was virtually gone. Only she and Daniel had known, at the time, that Janet had ascended after succumbing to her wounds, but the knowledge had done little to comfort either one of them. The fact of the matter was that Janet Fraser was now lost to them.

Having to endure that ridiculous investigation and interrogation by Kinsey's henchman on the heels of Janet's death had been almost more than they could bear. That and the documentary the President had commissioned to detail the Stargate Project for posterity. She and Daniel had spent many hours huddled together alone trying to deal with the overwhelming grief they felt. When they weren't crying, they spent hours making love or talking about their fallen friend. She and Daniel had never been closer than they were at that time. So close, in fact, that for the first time in her life, she hadn't felt like she immediately needed to run to Sheppard for comfort. Logan wrapped herself up in the warmth and comfort Daniel's love had given her then, and she could feel everything she'd felt for him all those years before.

McKAY'S LAB

Beckett had indeed found the residue from some sort of biological toxin on the small splinter he removed from Logan's sleeve. In fact it appeared that she had not even received the full dosage intended, since there was so much left on the splinter. Now the problem facing them lay in finding a cure before the toxin had a chance to do its work. McKay was researching the Ancient Database for anything related to the toxin they'd found and Caldwell was hovering, simply because there was nothing else he could do. Suddenly, an urgent call from the infirmary came crackling over the radio.

"Dr. Beckett, we need you in the infirmary!"

The three men thought the worst, each frozen in place for a moment.

"What's the problem?" he asked.

"Oh, sorry, no problem...It's just... Dr. Weir and Lyta are both awake."

"Are they lucid?" Beckett asked, unconsciously holding his breath.

"Completely."

The three men exchanged curious, yet hopeful glances.

"What about Colonel Devane?"

"No change yet."

"I'm on my way," Beckett informed him.

McKay locked the samples they'd been working on in his personal safe and followed Beckett and Caldwell to the infirmary. What they found there astounded them all. Weir and Lyta were sitting up in bed, bright eyed, lucid and talking.

"Elizabeth... How are you feeling?" Beckett asked.

"A little weak, but... _much_ better."

Caldwell immediately went to Lyta's side and embraced her. She blushed furiously as she noticed the others watching them, but she didn't shrink from Caldwell's embrace, nor the kiss he planted on her lips. "You sure you're feeling okay?"

"I feel much better Steven," she whispered.

"That's incredible! You were so sick..." he shook his head, not daring to question it for fear she might have a relapse.

When Beckett had finished with Weir, he came over and examined Lyta. Both women were showing signs of a complete recovery. He was as baffled by this as he'd been by the toxin itself. He then went to the other room to check on Logan. The news on her, however, was not as promising. At first glance, it could be assumed since she'd taken ill so much longer after the other two women, that her recovery would begin well after theirs had. However, Lyta had taken ill several hours after Weir, yet they recovered at almost exactly the same time.

Beckett had blood samples taken again from all three women, for comparison, and it appeared as though both Weir and Lyta's bodies were more able to fight off the effects of the toxin, whereas Logan's body, for whatever reason, was not. In fact, it looked like her body chemistry actually increased the volume of toxin in her system.

"Why only her?" Sheppard asked.

No one had an answer at first, then McKay offered a tentative assessment.

"The gene?"

They all looked at him curiously.

"The ancient gene... Remember how that nannite virus only killed people without the gene? Maybe this toxin works in the reverse way?"

"Singling out those who possess the gene..." Daniel muttered.

"Okay...so how do we CURE her?"

"I don't know, John..."

"You have to find a way." Sheppard said urgently.

"We will," McKay promised.

Daniel and Sheppard were again left alone with Logan.

The woman watched from across the infirmary while Beckett, McKay and the others put their heads together, trying to find an answer. She hadn't expected the toxin to be... selective... for lack of a better word. She'd already decided not to cure the other two women, especially having seen Caldwell with the Athosian woman again. She now began to wonder if he wasn't involved with both her AND Logan Devane.

Not that it mattered much, since she would permit neither of them to stand in her way again. She'd been very surprised when, first Weir, then Lyta began to wake up. According to her calculations, they should have been dead by then, not waking up. She'd missed something in her haste to get the toxin ready. The good thing, she thought, was that Devane hadn't shown any sign of improvement like the other two. At least she had that much to smile about.

She'd been watching Sheppard and Dr. Jackson fawn over Devane like she was the flippin' second coming or something. She was just grateful that Caldwell seemed to be otherwise occupied, or she knew he'd be in her room paying homage to the Holy Colonel of Gate-Travel as well!

She wondered if she might be able to get a hold of a blood sample from the three women, so she could tell why the other two had recovered but not Devane. It would be too risky to take the blood sample herself, but maybe she could snatch some from the lab without anyone being the wiser.

Logan continued to dream and relive her memories as she lay there unconscious, while two of the most important men in her life kept watch over her. She was vaguely aware that, for some reason, both Daniel and Sheppard were there with her. 'At the SGC?' she thought to herself. 'When had Sheppard received clearance to come here?' The question was only fleeting, however. All that mattered was that the two men she loved most were standing by her, together in the same room.

She couldn't believe her eyes when she saw Daniel walk down the hallway at the SGC. Her Daniel, who'd died and ascended the year before! She'd been warned that he wouldn't remember her, but he did. At least somewhat. He LOOKED at her like he knew her, though he wasn't sure how and she didn't care, all that mattered to her was that he was home!

They spent hours talking, and it was she who convinced him to join the briefing on the mission SG-1 was undertaking shortly after his return. She made him believe in himself again, and believe that he would regain his memory and his rightful place within the SGC. He fell for her all over again while they talked. And when he took her in his arms to give her a quick kiss goodbye, he'd been unable to pull away from that kiss. Something awoke inside of him as soon as his lips touched hers. Passion? Definitely! Respect? Of course. Love? No question. Trust? Unequivocally. He pulled her even tighter against him as his mouth gently explored hers and her arms locked around his body. His body definitely knew her and it felt so familiar to have her in his arms.

"Do you remember when we took that trip to Idaho?" he was murmuring to her.

Logan's mind instantly shifted, found the memory and began to relive it.

Beckett and McKay worked through the night trying to find a cure for the toxin slowly leeching the life out of Logan. By dawn, they appeared to be no closer than they'd been when they first started. They were getting extremely frustrated and had begun snapping at each other like an old, married couple.

Unable to tolerate the bickering and sniping, Caldwell took his leave and went to visit with Lyta, who was now fully recovered and ready to be released from the infirmary. Both she amd Weir were to be put under constant surveillance, albeit secretly, and they would both have a pair of guards stationed inside their respective quarters. They weren't happy about it, but upon being informed that they were likely deliberately targeted, they acquiesced without too much of a fight.

Logan was still going downhill, slowly but steadily. Daniel and Sheppard never left her side, alternately taking turns when nature called, or the medical staff pulled rank and insisted that they eat, drink or sleep. Trapped in her own mind, Logan continued to relive her life through her memories.

The first time she'd met Daniel Jackson had been seared into her memory. She'd never seen such piercing blue eyes before. Even behind his glasses, those eyes could shine with an intelligence and wit rarely seen in your average archaeologist. She could feel, again, the fluttering in her stomach as Daniel smiled warmly at her and took her hand to shake it in greeting as they were introduced. He'd already been with the program for four years when she'd been transferred there. His former wife, Sha're, was long gone by that time.

Oddly enough, then Colonel O'Neill had actually encouraged the relationship blossoming between Daniel and Logan. He'd seen the way Daniel lit up whenever Logan was around; a reaction he'd not seen since Sha're. Further, O'Neill genuinely liked Logan. He liked the effect she had on Daniel. He also liked that she didn't take any crap from him about the military, her job or anything else.

She'd heard all kinds of stories about Daniel and Sha're when she first joined the SGC, so she'd been concerned that in some respects she would never quite be able to measure up, in his eyes, to his former wife. Her fears, as it turned out, had been unfounded. With her, Daniel had found a passion beyond his wildest dreams. Logan found, in him, something she'd never known before. For the first time in her adult life, and albeit limited experience, Logan was unashamed to let loose in the bedroom, simply because Daniel had made her feel safe and confident with her sexuality. This was, of course, nothing she could or would share with Sheppard. He'd be horrified to hear the details of her sex life, always had been. Sheppard wanted her to remain virginal up to her wedding night, and possibly beyond.

Daniel and Sheppard exchanged a shocked glance as they looked down at Logan's suddenly smiling, and very amused face. She was completely unresponsive when they tried to talk to her. It was like she was lost in her own world; a world where they couldn't reach her.

Caldwell escorted Lyta to her quarters, adjoining his, and made sure she got settled in. He'd already explained to both Torus and Samuel that they were to take it easy on her, since she hadn't been feeling well. Torus solemnly swore to look after her while Caldwell went about his business. His next stop was at his own quarters, to shower and change clothes before heading back to the infirmary to check on Logan's condition. Before he could go into his quarters, he received a call from Beckett and McKay and decided to go see them first.

He was in much better spirits when he returned once again to his quarters. Exhausted, but in much better spirits. He headed straight for the shower, stripping his clothes off along the way and stopping only to grab a drink from the little refrigerator in the makeshift 'kitchen' he'd crafted for his quarters. He set the drink down on a shelf outside the bathroom while he turned on the shower and got a towel from the closet, then came back to get the bottle he'd set down.

He was completely unaware of the fact that he was not alone. He lingered longer than usual in the shower, suddenly feeling more tired than he did when he first came in. It was only when he heard soft music coming from the direction of his bedroom and noticed the lights dim that it occured to him that he wasn't alone. 'Lyta?' he wondered. He quickly discounted the notion because she would never seduce him that way. She was very proper, and their relationship hadn't progressed, yet, to physical intimacy. So who...?

He turned off the shower and dried himself off hastily. His clothes were in the bedroom, so he wrapped a towel around his waist and ventured cautiously out into the hall. His head was beginning to spin and he felt a little muddled, making him wonder if he'd been drugged.

"Hello Steven..." a female voice purred in the dimly lit bedroom. It took him a few moments to place the voice, since it was too dark to recognize her features. Plus, his head was getting fuzzier by the minute, and he was starting to feel an odd...warmth...coursing through his body and settling somewhere south of his navel.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, slightly slurring his words.

"I should think that would be obvious."

"Not to me," he muttered.

"I've been waiting for you to make the first move, but it's been so long I decided to take matters into my own hands... You must have known how I felt about you, Steven...I've seen you look at me with the same hunger I've always felt for you."

Caldwell shook his head, trying to clear his mind. Maybe it was the candlight, but he could have sworn everything had a sort of bluish tinge to it.

"No...I...You need to...leave...now..." he stammered.

"Don't be ridiculous, darling, we've waited so long to be together, I have no intention of leaving you...ever."

Caldwell stumbled and fell forward, catching himself against the bed. She was on him in a heartbeat.

"You see? I knew you couldn't wait any longer either!" she squealed delightedly, pushing him backwards onto the bed and straddling his lap.

"No!" he barked.

"It's alright, darling, no one is going to interrupt us tonight...No one's going to interfere anymore..." she trailed off and began planting hard kisses across his chest. Caldwell felt as though he were going to be sick. He tried bucking her off, but it only seemed to encourage her.

"Patience, darling, we'll get there!" she giggled.

"Get off me!" he ordered, causing a wave of nausea to wash over him.

"You shouldn't get all riled up, darling, I told you...No one is going to be interfering with us ever again..."

Now he understood.

"Logan...Dr. Weir...Lyta...YOU did that..." he gasped.

"Of course. They were always getting in the way...always trying to come between us..."

"Are you _nuts_?" he barked.

"Only about you," she teased, trying to be seductive.

"I know I'll have to find some other way to get rid of Elizabeth and the Athosian, but at least the major thorn in our side will soon be gone forever..." she continued to rain kisses all over his chest.

"No!" he cried. "You're wrong... Logan is... _strong_..."

"Oh please! Logan this, Logan that, everywhere I go it's Logan, Logan, Logan. Well, NOT ANYMORE, my love. I won't let her come between us anymore! Beckett will never find a cure, never, and she'll be dead soon."

"He already has..." He clamped his mouth shut. He hadn't meant to say that out loud.

"What?"

"Nothing," he croaked.

"If he's found a cure, then she'll... **no**! She's too far gone anyway... Still, I should make sure..."

She reached into her bag and pulled out a hypodermic. Unable to see what she was doing, and largely unable to move, he had no chance to fight her off. He felt the needle puncture his skin and weakly tried to call out for help, but she placed her free hand over his mouth and waited for the drug to do its work.

"Whether by my hand or someone elses, Logan Devane dies TODAY!"

She quickly threw on her clothes, over the skimpy teddy she was wearing, and when she was sure that he was completely under, she hurried out of his quarters.

Kolya watched with amazement as first one guard fell, then the other. He recognized the sound as being that of the Lantean weapon they called a zat gun. His eyes grew rounder as the woman ventured inside to check for more guards. When she saw none she slowly walked toward the cell he occupied. He recognized her, of course, having spoken to her on several occasions.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Having a private conversation," she replied coyly.

"Couldn't you simply have asked them to excuse us?"

"They wouldn't understand, nor do they have the stomach to do what you and I will surely agree has to be done."

"Has to be done about what?"

"About whom, Commander Kolya," she corrected him.

"Okay, to whom are you referring?" he asked, more than a little curious.

"Lieutenant Colonel Logan Devane."

That solidified his interest. "What about her?"

"I suppose no one told you that she's been ill for the past two days?"

"Ill? No, no one told me. What's wrong with her?" his gut churned at the thought.

"She'd dying, Acastus. Some kind of virulent poison is coursing through her veins. A poison with no antidote. Her death will be horrible. Excruciating, in fact, and disfiguring too."

Kolya was horrified.

"They know how bad it's going to be, how painful and yet they refuse to do anything to ease her passing," she told him.

"To ease her passing? I don't understand, don't your people have drugs to diminish the pain?" he asked, clearly anguished.

"Indeed we do, but it hasn't helped. It won't help. She will suffer unimaginable pain the closer she gets to the end, and I for one don't want to see her suffer any longer... They could end it for her now, but they won't. They don't have the courage to end her pain... but **you** do, don't you Acastus?"

"You mean to take her life?" he stared at her.

"To spare her the pain," she sighed.

"Even _Sheppard_ will not do this?" he asked in disbelief.

"He's in denial... Refuses to believe that he's about to lose his life-long friend."

"But he knows how much she suffers?"

"He does."

"It must stop," he said sadly.

"It must," she agreed. "If only there were someone willing to do what must be done..." she trailed off as she walked out the door.

Her zat skidded across the floor, landing mere feet from the cell door. Suddenly, the shield surrounding his cell was shut down. Without a moments hesitation he was out the door and running down the hall, hell-bent on reaching the infirmary.


	34. Chapter 34

INFIRMARY

Logan was still deeply lost in her memories as her body continued to fight against the toxin coursing through her body.

She was fourteen years old and enduring the ribbing of her so-called friends over being the only one of them never to have been kissed. Personally, she didn't see what all the fuss was about. And of course, Johnny would pummel any boy who so much as tried to kiss her. She was commiserating with her best friend later that evening as the two of them were holed up in his father's attic checking out the night sky with his telescope.

"One of these days, Sparky... One of these days I'm going to get out there," he murmured.

"Not without me, you won't!" she laughed.

"Never!" he assured her.

She grew suddenly quiet and serious, immediately drawing his attention from the night sky.

"What's wrong, Sparks?"

"That's what I wanted to ask you..." she sighed.

"What?"

"Is there something wrong with me?" she gazed up at him anxiously

Her question confused him. "Wrong with you? Nothing, why?"

"Because I'm not like Susie or Kimmy... always flirting with boys, and getting... kissed..."

Sheppard's face turned red, and deadly serious. "You don't _want_ to, do you Sparks?"

Logan shrugged. "I dunno Johnny... I guess I'm a little curious... you know, I mean they make it sound like it's _such_ a big deal and all..."

"You know that guys want more than THAT, right? Especially from someone like you?" he eyed her warily, wondering if some guy had actually tried to put the moves on her.

"What do you mean someone like me?" she asked defensively.

"Cool your jets, Sparks, I just mean that since you're so pretty and all..." he shook his head at her.

She smiled over at him appreciatively. "You think I'm pretty?"

"Awww, hell, Sparky, we've talked about this before... Of _course_ you're pretty. Drop dead pretty. You think I don't hear the other guys talk about you all the time?"

"Is that why you get in so many fights?" she arched an eyebrow at him, knowing how protective he was of her.

"That's why I _WIN_ so many fights!" he grinned.

"You've never kissed a girl before..." she ventured.

"Nope!"

"Why not?"

"Don't know any that I'd want to kiss, I guess," he shrugged.

"What if you kissed me?" she asked tentatively.

"You mean like a REAL kiss?" he asked, looking her right in the eye.

"Yeah..."

"Why?" he sat down next to her.

"Aren't you curious, at least... about what it feels like? What all the fuss is?" she stood abruptly and crossed to the window.

"I guess," he shrugged.

"So... if we kiss someone we trust, you know, not to run off and blab to everyone or anything... At least we'd know what the big deal is, right?"

"Yeah, I guess that's true..." he looked down at her upturned face.

Kissing her himself would be a lot better than having some other guy pawing at her, that's for sure. He never wanted any of those dirtbags who talked about her to get their grubby hands on her... ever!

"You sure?"

Logan thought about it for a moment. If there were one person on this earth she could trust more than anyone else, Johnny Sheppard was that person. "Yeah, I'm sure."

He hesitated for a few seconds, then walked around to where she was standing and took both of her hands in his. "I would never hurt you, you know that, right?"

"Of course I do," she assured him.

"Okay, if you don't like it, just stop me, okay? Kick me in the shin or something."

"I'm sure it'll be fine!" she giggled.

Before either of them could change their minds, he swooped in and covered her mouth with his own. Initial awkwardness aside, Logan felt a sudden tingle all the way down to her toes. Neither one of them was sure how long one should hold a kiss, but he figured a longer kiss was more preferable than a quick peck. Logan put her hands on his shoulders to steady her swaying body, and as she did so, his arms came around to circle her waist. Logan felt all fluttery and was just about to lock her arms around his neck when a sudden noise in the backyard below made them jump apart.

Logan was blushing fiercely, as was he when his mother called to them from the bottom of the stairs.

"Logan, sweetie... Your mom needs you back at the house!"

"Yes ma'am... On my way!" she replied.

After much nervous giggling, he asked if she was okay.

"I don't think she saw us," she murmured.

"I know... but are YOU okay... That wasn't too gross, was it?" he asked.

She looked heartbroken for a moment. "No...Was it for you?"

"No, no, God no, Sparks!" he assured her.

"Good... I thought it was... I dunno... fun?" she smiled happily at him.

He returned her smile. "Yeah... It was. This doesn't mean that you're gonna be out there kissing all kinds of guys, does it?" his smile fading to a scowl.

"No! I just wanted to know what it felt like, that's all," she assured him.

"Good, it gets pretty tiring beating up on all these guys as it is..." he grunted, only half-kidding.

She punched him playfully in the arm before turning to head down the stairs. She stopped abruptly and turned to look at him again. "Johnny?"

"Yeah?"

"I just wanted to say... um... thanks for... you know... " she grinned.

He flashed her one of his patented crooked smiles and shrugged his shoulders. "Thank YOU, Sparks."

"I'm sure other boys would pale in comparison," she winked and then skipped off down the stairs.

The scene in her mind shifted again. She was sitting in front of a small stage, surrounded by happy, drunken people like herself. In a rare moment of abandon, and fortified by the two beers he'd consumed, Daniel was up on stage dancing in front of Janet and Carter, who were singing back up for him in their own rendition of Robert Palmer's "Simply Irresistible".

Daniel had singled her out and was singing directly to her as if she were the only one in the room. She laughed and clapped as the song wound down, then jumped up and kissed him soundly as he stepped off the stage. Janet and Carter were smiling as they watched the two of them together, blissfully ignorant of anyone else around them. After dropping the two women off at their respective homes, he took her back to his house, where they spent most of the night making love.

Kolya wove his way meticulously toward where he remembered the infirmary to be. Every time he came across someone, he gave them a blast from the zat gun he carried. So far no one had managed to raise the alarm.

In Caldwell's quarters, Caldwell struggled to regain the use of his arms and legs. They felt like lead, and he seemed incapable of opening his eyes. Whatever she'd given him, it had rendered him totally helpless. Since they hadn't heard from Caldwell in some time, Beckett and McKay decided to go directly to him. They knocked at his door twice and received no response. Soon Lyta came to the door next door and asked what they needed. They informed her that they needed to see Caldwell and she was surprised that he wasn't already with them.

"And he does not answer the door?" she asked, suddenly concerned.

"No..."

Without hesitation, Lyta opened his door and proceeded inside with Backett and McKay closely behind. They found him on the bed, wrapped only in a towel.

"Steven!" she cried.

Beckett immediately began checking his vital signs.

"Is it the same... sickness Dr. Weir and I had?" she asked, deeply afraid.

Beckett shook his head. "No luv... he's been drugged, though... Colonel? Colonel? Can you hear me?"

Caldwell groaned.

"That's it, Colonel, try to fight your way through it now..." Beckett told him.

"Logan..." he croaked.

"What did he say?" Beckett asked.

"Logan," Mckay and Lyta replied together.

"We think we've got it, Colonel. The right antidote..." Beckett informed him.

"Danger... Logan..." Caldwell groaned.

"Is he...? Do you think whoever did this is going after Logan again?" McKay asked.

"They'd have to get past Sheppard to do it," Beckett reminded him.

"Without a stunner or a zat I certainly wouldn't want to try it," McKay said. "Or a 50-caliber rail gun... What if he does have..." McKay bolted out of the room, leaving Beckett and Lyta to tend to Caldwell. He didn't want to alert the assailant by making a public address, so he just ran. First to the armory for a weapon and then to the infirmary.

Logan smiled as Daniel idly traced a fingertip up the bare skin of her torso to her back and down her spine. It was early morning, and both of them were due to go off-world on different missions later today. The sun hadn't even risen yet, but Daniel was wide awake... all of him. She'd learned long before that morning was his favorite time to make love; not that she minded, of course. She feigned sleep not because she didn't want to make love with him, but because she loved what he was doing to her body and didn't want him to stop.

"God I love you, Logan..." he murmured.

"I love you, Daniel," she breathed.

A sudden commotion outside of her room caught Daniel and Sheppard off guard. Neither had time to react as Kolya burst into the room and fired at them. They went down before they could take so much as a step forward. Kolya slowly approached the unconscious woman on the bed. Her skin was so pale, but flushed at her cheeks and upper chest. She looked so beautiful, just lying there. The thought of her in pain was more than he could stand. He knew that this woman would never return the feelings he had for her, but he could do her this one service. He would end her unbearable suffering once and for all, and spare her an excruciating death. He raised the zat to fire at her, point blank, when he heard the door open. He turned and fired, not caring who it was. He wasn't about to let anyone stop him from freeing her.

He watched as two men in uniform crumpled to the floor. No one he knew. Before taking aim again, he stepped over and bent down to touch Logan's hair. He could feel the heat emanating from her tortured body. He leaned forward and kissed her on the lips. "Goodbye, beautiful Logan," he murmured before stepping back and raising his hand to fire.

Suddenly, McKay burst into Logan's room and dove behind another bed to avoid being hit with a zat blast. "Kolya! Don't do this!"

"I have to, since none of you will!"

"I thought you cared about her. Why would you want to kill her?" McKay whined.

"I can't let her suffer the way you all, who CLAIM to love her, watch her suffer. She's dying!"

"You're wrong!" McKay squawked. "We're so close to..."

"No! You can't save her. In your arrogance you've continued to let her suffer needlessly. No one can save her!"

"NO!" McKay shouted as Kolya turned back to fire at Logan.

Several shots rang out and Kolya fell forward over Logan's bed. McKay was still holding the gun on him when Bates and Teyla charged into the room. Bates checked Kolya while Teyla took the handgun out of a shaken McKay's hand.

"He's still alive, but he's got at least five bullets in him." Bates announced as he gingerly rolled Kolya off Logan and onto the floor.

"Why have you done this? Who let you out?" Teyla demanded.

Kolya opened his eyes and coughed weakly. "Spare her... the pain... End it..." he pleaded, looking over at Logan's bed.

"He was trying to euthanize her," McKay told them.

"Why?" Bates asked.

"Dying... too painful..." Kolya coughed up some blood this time. "She doesn't deserve to..."

Several nurses came into the room to see what had happened. Bates ordered them to look after Kolya, though he'd seen enough in battle to know that Kolya's life was hanging by a thread.

"Who let you out?" Teyla asked.

Kolya motioned her closer and gasped his last words into her ear. Teyla sat back and looked at him in shock and then over at Bates.

"What'd he say?"

She didn't have time to answer him as Beckett came in and ordered them all away from Logan. He was carrying a vial and a hypodermic.

"This had better work..." he muttered to himself as he plunged the needle directly into her flesh, rather than into the IV she was attached to.

"Where is Colonel Caldwell?" Teyla asked.

"He's in his quarters... he was attacked earlier, but he's okay," Beckett assured them.

"Attacked? Do you know by whom?" Bates asked.

"No, he wasn't able to tell us... he'd been drugged, so he's pretty out of it."

"We will send more guards to watch over the infirmary, doctor, but you must not allow anyone else to come into this room," Teyla instructed.

"Alright...do you know who did this then?"

"We do," she confirmed.

"Would you mind sharing that information?"

Teyla told him and his jaw dropped in shock and disbelief.

"Why?" was all he could say.

"It is possible that she viewed Dr. Weir, Lyta and Logan as a threat to her - an obstacle between herself and Colonel Caldwell."

Beckett shook his head as Teyla and Bates hurried out the door to summon help to guard Logan's room. They did this in person so as not to alert the culprit to the fact that they knew who she was. Once the guards were posted, Teyla, Beckett, Lorne and Ronon began searching for their quarry.

By the time they'd gotten Daniel, Sheppard and the others comfortably placed in beds, Logan began to show signs of definite improvement. Half an hour later, both Daniel and Sheppard awoke and limped back to her bedside. They were elated to learn that she appeared to be responding to the antidote and her condition continued to improve. They were less than pleased to learn what had happened while they were out, and who it was who'd set everything into motion.

"But why let Kolya out to do her dirty work? Why not just come at us herself?" Daniel asked.

"Well, I'm sure she realized that he stood a better chance against you two than she did," Beckett mused. "Maybe she didn't want to reveal herself either. She's acted under the radar all this time, I mean, nobody would have ever suspected her of something like this."

"But she revealed herself to Caldwell," Sheppard winced at the thought of him getting... well... RAPED... by that woman.

"She's obviously deranged," Beckett said. "Maybe she thought that he returned her feelings and wouldn't turn her in?"

"She'd _have_ to be deranged to think that!" Sheppard said.

She stood in the hall outside Caldwell's door, trying to compose herself before going inside. By now Kolya had taken care of that ####, Devane. Now she would have Caldwell all to herself... at least she would once she'd eliminated the Athosian woman and Dr. Weir. But, at least for tonight, Caldwell would be all hers. She took a deep breath and opened the door. It was dark, just as she'd left it, and she was pleased to find Caldwell still laying on the bed, right where she'd left him. She began unbuttoning her blouse when suddenly, the lights came on and she was face to face with four guns pointed at her. Caldwell weakly lifted his head and smiked at her.

"Would you care to tell them what you're up to, Doctor Camp, or should I?" he asked.

"Steven... what is this... what are all these people doing here?" she asked.

"We are here to protect him from you?" Teyla informed her.

"Protect him? Why? I would never hurt my... husband..." she announced.

"Your WHAT?!" Caldwell gasped, feeling ill at the mere thought.

"Darling, there's no need to hide our relationship from them," her eyes had taken on a somewhat fanatical gleam.

Teyla stepped in front of her, blocking her view of Caldwell. "This man is not your husband," she said.

Camp glared at her angrily. "You want him for yourself, don't you? Every woman who knows him wants him!" she complained.

"Hardly!" Caldwell snorted.

"Well, you can't have him, Teyla... I took care of the others who tried to come between us and I can take care of you too!" Camp swore vehemently.

"I should very much like to see you try." Teyla challenged.

"So would I," Bates whispered to Lorne who snickered.

Camp suddenly whipped out a knife and lunged at Teyla. Ronon, having the only clean shot, fired his gun at her. When the first shot didn't stop her, he fired again. She reared back and then came at Teyla again. This time Bates fired at her and she went down. Caldwell was eternally grateful that Lyta and the boys hadn't been there to witness this.

Camp gasped a few times and called out "Steven!" once before she fell silent forever.

Sheppard had been called out to the hall just outside her door and Beckett was tending to the other injured people Kolya had shot when Logan opened her eyes for the first time. Everything was fuzzy, but she could make out Daniel's face looking down at her.

"Hey there gorgeous," he smiled.

"Daniel..." she croaked, smiling crookedly.

"Come on, open those gorgeous green eyes," he cooed, taking her hand in his.

"What... happened?" she asked, dazedly looking around the room, clearly confused. "Did Janet redecorate the infirmary?" she asked.

"Janet?" he asked.

"Never mind... Just glad to see you."

"Likewise," he grinned and bent over to kiss her on the forehead.

She moved her face so he ended up kissing her full on the mouth, instead of the forehead. Unfortunately, Sheppard walked in at that moment to find them kissing and, completely taken aback, his features darkened. "What the hell is this?!" he demanded.

Logan jumped and groggily looked over at him. "Hey flyboy!" she said.

"Hey yourself," he growled.

"Wait... when did they let you..." she trailed off in confusion. When HAD they given Sheppard clearance to come inside the SGC? She'd been trying to get him reassigned here for ages, could it be that O'Neill and Hammond had finally done it?

"Janet, you don't know my friend here, do you?" she asked.

Daniel and Sheppard turned to see who she was talking to, but all they saw was an empty corner of the room.

"Sparks... Who the hell are you talking to?" Sheppard asked.

"Janet..." she pointed at the corner.

"Janet...FRASER?" Daniel asked.

"How many Janet's do you know, babe? Yes, Janet FRASER."

"Babe?" Sheppard gawked at her.

"Janet... here?" Daniel looked around, hoping to catch a glimpse of her. He didn't doubt that Logan had seen her, maybe even spoken to her, given how close she'd been to death.

"What the hell's wrong with you two? I'm glad that you finally met face-to-face, but it's no fair teaming up on me while I'm laid up..." she trailed off with a yawn.

Okay... Now all three of them were confused.

"Logan... what makes you think Janet Fraser is here?" Daniel continued looking around the room.

"Daniel! She's _right there_! Would you say something, Janet? Help me out here?"

"Sparks, there's nobody there..." he trailed off as a brilliant white light began to form, coalescing into the form of a tiny, raven haired woman.

"Janet!" Daniel gasped.

Sheppard gaped at her, then Daniel, then Logan before gaping again at the woman Logan had known as Janet Fraser.

"Thank God! You two almost had me there for a minute!" Logan chuckled wearily.

"You need to rest, Logan," Janet said, coming over to stand beside her. "Go to sleep now," she ordered.

Logan immediately began to yawn and her eyelids fluttered a few times before closing. Her breathing slowed and deepened into her regular sleep pattern.

"Janet...What?"

"It's good to see you too, Daniel. And to finally meet _you_ , Colonel Sheppard."

"Likewise," he replied cautiously, not entirely certain he wasn't hallucinating.

"What's going on...?" Daniel asked.

"I've been here for quite some time, Daniel."

"Without making your presence known."

"Yes. You do realize how close she came to..."

"Don't...even...go...there..." Sheppard snapped.

"I'm forbidden to interfere, as you know, but I wanted to be here...for her..."

"You were going to help her ascend." Daniel deduced.

"It's not necessary now," she announced with a smile.

"I hope you're as happy about that as we are?" Sheppard asked.

"I am... I never believed it was her time... There is something you should know, however."

"What's that?" Daniel asked.

"As I'm sure you noticed, Logan is a bit... disoriented."

Sheppard glared at Daniel. "Well that's one word for it!"

"Yeah, we, uh...noticed."

"While Logan was unconscious, she was trapped, for lack of a better word, within her own memories."

"What do you mean?" Sheppard asked.

"She was reliving her life, through her memories."

"As though she were seeing her life flash before her eyes?" Daniel asked.

"Something like that. She was in the middle of that when Doctor Beckett administered the antidote that brought her back from that twilight state."

"And... so?" Sheppard prodded.

"The last memory she'd been reliving... She's still there," she told them.

"What do you mean?" Sheppard asked, dread growing.

"As far as Logan is concerned, she's still working at the SGC, you're still in Afghanistan and Daniel is still her... boyfriend."

"How can you know that?" Sheppard demanded.

Daniel gave him a meaningful glance. "When, EXACTLY, is she...uh...stuck?"

"Remember when you, Logan, Sam and I went to that karaoke bar and we cajoled you into singing with us?"

"Yeah..." he looked a bit uncomfortable.

"That's about where she is right now."

Daniel's mind sifted back to that night and thought about what they'd been doing around that time. He couldn't stifle the wide grin that spread across his face at the memory, prompting another glare from Sheppard.

"Yeah, right... We were definitely... together then," he murmured uneasily.

"So she doesn't remember any of this? Finding the outpost in Antarctica? The mission to Pegasus? Getting kidnapped in Afghanistan?"

"None of it," Janet confirmed.

"Will she?" Daniel asked.

"I really can't say."

"Can't or won't?" Sheppard asked.

"Can't... It's wholly dependent on Logan. The antidote hasn't cured her completely, at least not yet. Much of her recovery depends on her own will to heal."

"Why did you make her go to sleep? Didn't you want her to hear this?" Sheppard asked.

"She is the one person I cannot reveal this information to. You two on the other hand... That's a bit of a grey area..."

"Loophole?" Sheppard quipped.

"Something like that," she winked. "You shouldn't tell her either, by the way."

"Tell her about you or about any of it?"

"I'll leave that up to you. I have definitely overstayed, so I have to leave you now..."

"Janet!"

"Wait! Can't you tell me if she's going to be okay?" Sheppard pleaded.

"I wish I could, John... Know this, though..." she beckoned him closer to whisper in his ear. "The love is still there. It is still a part of her... locked inside. You simply need to find a way to unlock it."

Sheppard looked at her apprehensively.

"And don't worry," she winked again. "Your secret is safe with me."

She smiled once more at them as the light coalesced around her again and she vanished into thin air. Sheppard glanced over at Daniel.

"Don't get any ideas, Jackson," he warned. "She's been through enough."

"I told you, I'm with Kitah now. What Logan and I shared is in the past."

"For you maybe, it isn't for her... At least not right now."


	35. Chapter 35

Logan slept until Beckett came in to check on her progress. The others had already recovered and were going about their business, but only half-heartedly as they waited for news on her condition.

Sheppard hastily filled in Weir and Caldwell, who was also recovering in the infirmary from his drugging. They were shocked to learn about what had happened and even more surprised to hear about the visit from Janet Fraser.

Logan waited for Beckett to finish with her and go on his way before speaking to Sheppard. "You okay?" she asked.

"Me? Yeah, I'm not the one who was poisoned by a madwoman. How are _you_ feeling?"

"I'm fine..." trying to sit up and failing miserably. "I just need a little more rest...I think..."

Sheppard sat down on the bed next to her and took her hand in his. A shot of heat went through her as he touched her, causing her no small amount of confusion. "So... what's the last thing you remember?" he asked.

She thought for a moment, a wide grin creeping across her face. "You don't want to talk about that..." she smiled.

Sheppard stiffened and his face reddened. "Do you remember waking up here?"

She gasped and then looked around. "Oh... _right_! Janet was here and..." looking around again. "...Where's Daniel?"

"He'll be back," Sheppard replied through clenched teeth.

Logan noticed his mood and immediately called him on it. "Hey, I thought you sort of approved of Daniel... What's with the attitude?"

"Attitude...? I'm not... I... guess I'm just tired..." he trailed off with a scowl.

"I'm sorry I worried you," she murmured.

The way he looked at her cut clear to her soul. He looked so... _sad_. She was going to fully recover so he should be happy but... there was something else too, in the way he looked at her. It was almost as though he were _willing_ her to remember something. Something very important.

"What _aren't_ you telling me?" she asked suspiciously.

"You're awake!" Daniel chirped when he walked in and saw her sitting up.

"Daniel!" she held out her arms to him.

Sheppard turned away to mask his irritation as Daniel somewhat reluctantly stepped forward and enfolded her in his arms. He wasn't comfortable with keeping up the charade, but Heightmeyer had warned them that they could do severe damage to her psyche if she weren't allowed to work through things on her own. It was bad enough that she didn't remember the last five years of her life, but to learn how DRASTICALLY her life had changed, and to have to adjust to those changes in an instant? It was going to be extremely difficult and painful for her to process.

As uncomfortable as Daniel was, he would have been doubly so had he known the true nature of Logan and Sheppard's relationship. He'd suspected for a long time that Sheppard viewed her as more than a childhood friend, but he really had no idea that Logan's feelings for Sheppard had evolved as well. He had developed feelings for Kitah, as he'd told Sheppard, he could even admit to loving her, and he would never do anything to hurt her. Yet he still felt an undeniable pull when it came to Logan. They had shared a lot together, and there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for her... And if he were being completely honest with himself, he couldn't help the way his body responded to her when she kissed him. He felt like a complete pig, but there it was. He and Logan had never experienced any problems with physical intimacy, quite the contrary. He would never act on it, of course, but...

"What's wrong?" Logan asked.

"Huh?" Daniel blinked at her.

"Has John been giving you a hard time?" she shifted her gaze to Sheppard and back again.

"No!" Both Sheppard and Daniel responded vehemently.

"You guys are acting really... _weird_. What's up?" she asked.

"Greetings Logan Devane!" Teal'c walked in and headed straight for her.

"T!" she cried.

Daniel stepped aside so the big Jaffa could hug her.

"It is good to see you recovering."

"Thanks... I don't remember being sick, so..." she shrugged.

"We were greatly concerned for some time."

"Sorry about that... Where's Sam? And Colonel O'Neill?"

Teal'c looked over at Sheppard and Daniel questioningly.

"Okay, now _Teal'c_ is acting weird... Someone tell me what the _hell_ is going on!" she demanded.

Caldwell burst through the door in a wheelchair, causing all of them to snap around. Logan immediately sat up and saluted, surprised that Sheppard hadn't done the same.

"At ease," Caldwell smiled.

"Thank you sir...Are...are you okay?" she asked, wondering if he'd been poisoned as well.

"I'm fine..." he stopped himself from addressing her as 'Colonel.' He looked at the others meaningfully. "I've been told that the young lady needs her rest."

"I just woke up, sir," she protested.

"Nevertheless. Gentlemen?"

Daniel gave her hand a squeeze and followed Teal'c out the door. Sheppard lingered a moment longer.

"You too, Sheppard." Caldwell ordered.

"I...yes sir," he bent over and kissed Logan on the forehead, causing her eyes to widen in shock.

Caldwell waited for Sheppard to leave before he spoke again. "I can't tell you how happy I am to hear that you're recovering."

"I...thank you..."

"I know you're a little confused right now, Logan, but they tell me that it'll get better in time..." he assured her.

They were interrupted by the return of Beckett. "I thought I told you she was supposed to rest!" Beckett scolded. "And for that matter, Colonel, so are YOU!"

Logan smiled, knowing exactly how Caldwell felt about doctor's pulling rank.

"You heard the man," he shrugged.

"Thanks for coming, sir."

"I'll be back to check on you later."

"You, _out_! You, _lie down_ and try to get back to sleep!"

Logan obeyed without argument. She was beyond confused and it was giving her a headache. Who was this doctor? And why were Daniel, Sheppard and Teal'c acting so weird? And why had Sheppard had the audacity to kiss her in front of a superior officer? More importantly, why in the world did she get all fluttery and hot when Sheppard so much as looked at her? She went round and round in her head with more and more questions until fatigue took over and she felt herself on the verge of falling asleep. Where was John? He might let himself be chased away for a few minutes or so but there was no way he'd let anyone keep him from her side when she was sick or hurt. It was her last conscious thought before sleep claimed her again.

Logan let the bubbling water ease the tension from her body, smiling with pleasure as Daniel massaged the sore muscles in her back. She leaned back against him and felt his arms come around her. Nestling her head in the space between his neck and shoulder, she turned slightly and kissed his neck.

"This was a great idea..." she purred.

"I think so too," he smiled.

She woke with a start. It was dark now, but she could make out the shape of Daniel standing by the window on the far side of the room. He was so deep in thought that he didn't hear her get up. On weak, quaking legs, she slowly made her way over to him and wrapped her arms around him from behind. "Daniel," she murmured.

"What are you doing up?" he asked, holding tightly to the arms that clasped his waist.

"I needed to get up and walk around."

"You're not supposed to..." he turned around to face her.

"I... Daniel... could you just hold me please?" She sounded so frightened and vulnerable. Very unusual for her. He quickly pulled her up against him, letting her rest her face against his chest. He could feel her body trembling from the effort of staying on her feet.

"Come on, sweetie, let's get you back in bed."

Logan shook her head negatively. "Only if you come in with me!" she pouted.

"I don't think you can fight me right now, so..." he trailed off and easily lifted her into his arms.

"Nto fair!" she complained, but happily wrapped her arms around his neck as he carried her back to the bed.

"What the hell is this?" Sheppard demanded angrily.

"Uh-oh, busted!" she giggled.

"She just wanted to stretch her legs and now she's getting back in bed like a good little soldier," Daniel explained.

"Cool your jets, flyboy, I'm not going AWOL!" she groused.

"Damn right you're not!" he huffed.

"John... really, I'm fine," she sulked.

"Actually, I'm glad you're here... I have some...things I need to catch up on...so..." Daniel trailed off.

"I'll stay with her," he assured Daniel.

"What am I, five?" she asked indignantly. "I don't need a babysitter."

"Says the women who's already disobeying doctor's orders," Sheppard countered.

"I'll be back," Daniel told her.

"I should hope so," she muttered.

When Daniel started to walk away, she cleared her throat and called to him. "Uh, Daniel?"

"Yeah?"

She glared at him without saying anything.

"Oh...sorry..." he came back over to her bed and bent down.

He'd intended only to give her a quick peck, but Logan locked her arms around his neck as she kissed him long and hard. Daniel could feel the hostility emanating from Sheppard and got out of the room as quickly as he could.

"You _could_ be a little nicer to him, you know... What if I marry him someday?"

"Bloody hell..." Sheppard muttered under his breath.

Fatigue was creeping over her, but she wanted him to talk to her. She had a lot of questions, not the least of which was why he was so hostile toward Daniel, when he hadn't been before now.

"John," she yawned. "I wish you'd tell me what's going on."

"What's going on is that you're very sick... You almost died, and you have to know that scared the hell outta me... Now you insist on pushing yourself too hard..." he stopped as emotion began to get the better of him.

"Johnny..."

"Go to sleep, Sparks."

"C'mere," she yawned again, moving over in the bed.

Sheppard climbed in next to her and pulled her against him. She felt electricity shoot through her again as she settled in the circle of his arms. She was so tired... and weak... It was really annoying. The butterflies were fluttering in her stomach again, but she was too tired to question it. She nuzzled her face into the curve of his shoulder and breathed in his scent. 'Had he always smelled this good?' she wondered. As she drifted off to sleep she was vaguely aware of the almost overwhelming urge to suckle the spot on his neck where you could see his pulse beating under the skin.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"I'm telling you, there's no way we're gonna be able to keep things from her. And Sheppard? Not a chance," Daniel shook his head.

Heightmeyer shrugged. "Do you understand the danger involved in giving her information her mind isn't ready to process?"

"You know Logan Devane, Doctor... You've been around for a while and you've had dealings with her. Do YOU really think she's not going to question..." Caldwell arched an eyebrow at her.

"Clearly she has to be told WHERE she is," she sighed.

"Ya _think_?!" Daniel asked sarcastically.

Caldwell held up a hand. "I have to agree with Dr. Jackson on this. Logan Devane is much stronger, physically and mentally than you're giving her credit for. And for us to prohibit Sheppard from telling her everything that's happened... You're asking him to destroy the trust they've built over a lifetime."

"What I'm asking is for all of us to care enough about her to do the right thing for her in the long run,"Heightmeyer insisted.

LATER THAT DAY

"Atlantis? THE Atlantis?" she asked incredulously.

"Yep!" Sheppard replied.

"What? How? My God, Daniel must be ecstatic!"

Sheppard frowned. "Among other people."

"So... clearly I'm missing more than just a couple of days then..."

"Yeah..."

"So? Tell me!" she prodded impatiently.

"Doc Heightmeyer thinks it's best if you try to remember on your own," he arched an eyebrow at her, knowing that would not go over well at all.

"What? **_No_**!" she complained.

"She says you need time to process."

"Oh process, schmocess!" she scoffed.

Sheppard laughed. "I told her you'd say that."

She looked up at him, suddenly serious. "We're talking about a significant length of time, aren't we? Not days or weeks... Months?"

"Would your head explode if I told you that you're a Lt. Colonel now, not a Major?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

Logan smiled weakly. "Really?"

"Me too!" he grinned.

"THAT long..." she looked up at him sadly. "John..."

"Hey..." he pulled her into his arms. "It's not as bad as all that. I promise you, we have a great life here."

"I'm sure, but..."

"No buts, Sparky. You love it here."

"So much has changed...You...Daniel...We... I can feel him trying to distance himself... Are we even _together_ anymore?"

Sheppard tucked her head under his chin and held her tight, unsure how much to say. His gut was screaming at him that Heightmeyer was wrong, that he should tell her everything.

"I guess that means no..." she croaked.

"Let me ask you this... From what you can remember, has Daniel ever expressed any concern about what you do? About the danger?"

Logan thought for a moment. "Yes... He worries that I'll be taken by the Goa'uld, like... his... wife was."

"And he's been increasingly more vocal about it?" he prodded.

"Yes... A little."

"How do you feel about that?" Not that he really needed to ask.

"You KNOW how I feel about it!" she growled.

"Yeah, I do... But suppose he got _more_ vocal about it and _more_ insistent that you not go off-world?"

"Are you saying that I ended it?" she gaped at him incredulously.

"It was more of a mutual decision... One you _both_ struggled with; but you agreed that it was best for both of you."

"Then... why the act?" she asked, crestfallen.

"He cares about you Logan... That never changed. And it's not like it was torture for him to have you slobber all over him!" he teased.

"I don't slobber!" she smacked him playfully.

"If you say so..."

She needed to change the subject. "How did you finally get assigned to..."

"You arranged for me to fly General O'Neill..."

"General?"

"Yeah...anyway, long story short - there was this ancient outpost they found in Antarctica and since I was stationed at McMurdo..."

"WHAT?!"

"Do you wanna hear this or not?" he sighed.

"Yeah, yeah... Sorry, please continue."

"You arranged for me to fly O'Neill from McMurdo to this outpost. Originally, I was supposed to wait for him on the surface, but we were attacked by this ancient drone weapon and since I saved his six, he thought I deserved to see what was going on down there... Then they found out I had the ancient gene required to operate ancient technology and Weir wanted me to join the Atlantis expedition."

"Ancient gene? Weir? Who's Weir?"

"Dr. Elizabeth Weir. She's the civilian head of operations here. And as for the gene, it's supposed to be pretty rare, but you can't operate ancient technology without it. YOU have it, too, by the way."

Logan was reeling from everything Sheppard had told her, and he'd even said that he was just scratching the surface. She wanted him to keep going, but it was clear that she needed time to process. He could see how hard it hit her to learn that she and Daniel were no longer together, though he did his level best not to let her see how hard it was for him to see her pining over Daniel.

She awoke early in the morning to find Sheppard curled up beside her. A rush of warmth stole over her as she softly stroked the unruly chocolate brown hair. At least she never had to worry about Sheppard and herself drifting apart. He would never leave her, nor she him. Unable to sleep, she quietly slipped out of bed and pulled the blanket up over Sheppard. Throwing her robe on, she tiptoed out of the infirmary and went in search of Daniel. She had no idea how she was going to find him in the still sleeping city, but it felt good to be up and out, despite the shakiness of her limbs.

As she passed a doorway at the end of the hall, the doors slid open and a panel lit up inside. It looked to be a map of the city. Unsure what to do, but remembering that Sheppard said the ancient technology utilized a mental component, she concentrated on the name "Daniel Jackson". The doors slid closed and she felt slightly queasy as the closet shifted. The doors opened again and she found herself in a different part of the city. At the end of the hall she could see a dim light turn on over the last door.

"Could it be that simple?" she mumbled to herself.

She shrugged and then started down the hall. When she reached the door, she knocked lightly and waited. A moment later, a disheveled and shirtless Daniel came to the door. Despite what Sheppard had told her, her heart turned over at the sight of him.

"Logan?" his voice was throaty, heavy with sleep.

"Hi..." she whispered.

"What are you doing...?" he trailed off as he ushered her inside.

She looked over at the rumpled bed and her pulse quickened as she pictured him sleeping there. And remembering that this...the early morning...was his favorite time to...

"Logan, what are you doing up? Are you alright?" he asked worriedly.

"I...I...couldn't sleep."

"How did you find me?" he asked.

Logan grinned, " _That_ I couldn't even begin to tell you," she admitted.

He sat her down on the edge of the bed and pulled a blanket around her trembling body. She hadn't even realized that it was so cold. He rubbed her arms briskly, causing waves of desire to course through her. All she wanted to do was kiss him. She'd noticed before that he seemed to have bulked up, but now, with his shirt off she could see how much more muscled his body had become. Daniel studied her face for a moment, recognizing the heat in her eyes and felt that same heat flare up, unbidden, in himself. He'd thought himself long past it, but even with everything that had changed between them, she could still get to him.

"Logan..."

"John told me what happened between us," she blurted out. Atta girl... just rip the bandaid off and be done with it.

"What?" he asked, unsure of her meaning.

"He told me... that you and I aren't together anymore," the sadness in her eyes was excruciating.

"I see..." he nodded but didn't break eye contact.

"You should be somewhat relieved...you know...that I won't be throwing myself at you anymore."

"Logan... You weren't _throwing_ yourself at me," he grinned, in spite of himself.

"No? Sure felt that way," she blushed.

"Why... did he... tell you?" As if he had to ask. He'd known there would be no way that Sheppard would lie to her, or keep things from her.

"You should know the answer to that as well as I do. I can still remember when you... came back...descended...whatever."

Daniel nodded and thought back to the moment he first saw her after returning to Earth with no memory. No one had seemed familiar. He felt so lost and unsure of himself. Then he saw her running towards him from the end of the hall near where they'd quartered him. She'd been warned, of course, that he had no memory, but she threw herself into his arms anyway, tears streaming down her face. Teal'c had been with him, but he'd discreetly backed away and left the two of them alone.

She hadn't spoken a word, save for whispering his name. But for the first time since encountering Jack and the others, he truly believed that he was who they'd said he was. Hers was the only face that seemed even remotely familiar. His body certainly recognized her, that was for sure. When she'd finally pulled back to look up into his eyes, he felt the undeniable pull between them. He didn't know her name, but he KNEW her.

"You wanted to know everything, too, as I recall. You didn't want to wait and see if you could remember on your own."

"I know... And I agree. I tried telling Heightmeyer that but...they were afraid it would do more harm than good," he shrugged.

"John told me...but, I want to hear it from you..."

Daniel spent the next hour explaining what had first gone wrong in their relationship and how things had deteriorated from there. He assured her that love had never been a problem for them, nor had sex. He assured her that he never blamed her exclusively for any trouble they had, in fact he'd taken most of the blame on himself for being unable to deal with the dangers of her job as part of an SG Team.

He filled her in on the year she was presumed dead at the hands of an Afghan War Lord and how that had been the catalyst for Sheppard to agree to join the Atlantis expedition - to honor her memory and her wishes. He also explained how, upon her rescue, she'd beaten all land-speed records in getting herself assigned to Pegasus. She laughed when he told her that she'd wanted to get as far away from Afghanistan as possible.

"Mission accomplished," she chuckled.

He told her how he'd wanted her to remain with him on Earth so they could try to rebuild their relationship, but she'd refused. Partly because she wanted to come to Atlantis and partly because she knew that there was no romantic hope left for the two of them. Everything he told her SOUNDED like her, sounded like the things she would do, but it was as if he were talking about someone else. At this moment, this point in her memory, she couldn't imagine wanting to be anywhere but by his side. The love she felt for him was as real and as strong as if none of the events of the past few years had ever happened; and for her, they hadn't. She knew all of this, but she couldn't FEEL it; not yet.

"I know how hard this must be for you," he murmured.

"I just...Daniel, I don't know what to do with all these... _feelings_."

"I wish I could help you with that."

"I wish a lot of things..." she said sadly. "But, I better get back before..." Sheppard burst through the door before she could finish her sentence. "John!" she gasped.

"What the hell, Sparky?!" he was breathing heavily, as if he'd been running a marathon.

"I was just on my way back," she muttered.

"Why didn't you wake me? And why didn't YOU call me?" he asked her, then Daniel.

They looked at each other, somewhat guiltily.

"Hey, don't blame this on Daniel, I'm the one who snuck out and I was on my way back, so cool it!"

" _Woman_..." Sheppard seethed.

"I'm sorry I didn't call you...It was so early, I just..."

"Don't apologize, Daniel. John has always been an overprotective busybody!" she said and stormed out the door.

Both Sheppard and Daniel looked completely exasperated as they stared after her.

"Go," Daniel prodded.

Sheppard caught up to her as she reached the transporter and pulled her aside. "Wait a minute..." He said, gently backing her up to the wall. "I'm not the bad guy here, Sparks... You are in no condition to be wandering the halls, for crying out loud, you almost DIED! Do you have any idea how much that..." he trailed off as he began to choke up.

Logan felt instantly sorry for giving him a hard time. It wasn't like her to take it out on him when she was hurting. And she DID know what her near death must have done to him, particularly after what Daniel had told her about being presumed dead once already. She knew how she would feel if their positions were reversed, and she'd probably be much worse than he was. Adding to her already confused and tumultuous emotions, were the electrical charges he set off in her whenever he came near her. Even now, she could feel electricity coursing through her body.

"I'm sorry John," she murmured.

"Please don't do that to me again?" he asked.

"I promise."

"Good, now let's get you back to bed. You look ready to pass out right now."

She was, but she didn't admit it. He made a move to pick her up and carry her but she would have none of it. She did, however, hold on to his arm for support as he escorted her back to the infirmary.

"How did you even find him?" he asked.

"I have no idea," she admitted.


	36. Chapter 36

THREE DAYS LATER

"How does that make you feel?"

Logan glared at Heightmeyer. "How am I SUPPOSED to feel?"

"Wow... I feel like we've done this all before," she was trying to make light of the situation to put Logan at ease.

"That makes one of us," she muttered.

For the first time in her dealings with Logan Devane, Heightmeyer actually found herself getting annoyed. She was only trying to help the poor woman!

"Bottom line, Colonel, these sessions are not optional, they are mandatory. There is no way you are getting cleared for duty until and unless *I* am convinced that you are giving therapy an honest effort. There is no way I am going to clear you unless I feel that you are, or have dealt with what happened to you."

"With all due respect, _doctor_ , I don't even REMEMBER what happened to me, so how PRECISELY am I supposed to deal with it to your satisfaction?!"

"These sessions are for YOUR good, Colonel, not mine. Now I realize you have your good friend, Colonel Sheppard, to talk to but he is not a trained or licensed therapist, psychiatrist or psychologist. He isn't trained to look for warning signs of possible trouble. Furthermore, he specifically went against my recommendations to let you remember your past on your own, which in my opinion, only made your life more difficult."

"More difficult? MORE difficult?! Are you KIDDING me?" she growled.

"I realize having no memory of the past few years is difficult, but..."

"Difficult?! Try _HELL_ , lady! I wake up to find myself in a world I don't recognize and I find out that the man I love is no longer..." she trailed off as she felt herself beginning to unspool.

Heightmeyer smiled inwardly. Getting angry helped, it seemed. "No longer in love with you?" she finished for her.

"Among other things," Logan admitted.

"It hurts," Heightmeyer prodded.

"Yes...It does."

"I'd be worried if it didn't hurt."

"Thanks...I think."

"It's hard to know what to do with those feelings, isn't it?"

"Yes."

Heightmeyer eyed her curiously. "Tell me something... You've been up and about for three weeks now, right?"

"Yes."

"Have you even noticed any of the other men around the city? Has anyone caught your eye? Even just enough for you to recognize that you might find them attractive in any way?"

Logan's fist thought was of Sheppard, but she quickly pushed that aside. "Not really."

"No? Not even Colonel Mitchell? I saw the two of you talking earlier."

Logan thought for a moment, then blushed slightly. She had noticed the striking resemblance he bore to Daniel. That, and she had to admit that he seemed like a great guy in his own right. Once she'd gotten past the physical resemblance, she found she actually liked him quite a bit.

"He's... attractive."

"Is it hard for you to admit that?"

"Yes."

"Why?" Heightmeyer prodded.

"I feel... I feel... Like I'm... cheating... or something."

"Hard to reconcile the way things are now with the way they were then, that's perfectly natural."

Logan nodded. "I never would have noticed any man when I was with Daniel... I never did."

"What you're feeling is understandable, Logan, and completely normal."

Logan laughed out loud at that comment. "Whatever NORMAL is."

"It will come, Logan, trust me. Right here, right now, you're trying to deal with a loss, not just of memory, but of your significant other. Daniel used to be a huge part of your life and now he isn't, that's a huge adjustment, and you need to cut yourself some slack."

"That's not something I do well, doctor," Logan sighed.

"You need to _try_. As far as I know, and I do know a lot, you aren't romantically involved with anyone at the present time. You need to keep reminding yourself that you are a free agent. You are free to pursue a relationship, friendship or otherwise, with another man. Jump back into the dating pool and let yourself have fun. The last thing you need at this point is more pressure, from yourself or anyone else."

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"Lolo!"

Logan turned around at the sound of the ecstatic squeal.

"Hey little man!" she said, scooping the boy up and into her arms.

Now this was ONE male she had no problem getting close to! She'd been delighted when Caldwell had first brought him to the infirmary to reintroduce her to her God-Son. For once, she didn't feel the overwhelming pressure to remember him. Samuel didn't ply her with questions, well, not SERIOUS questions anyway. He was just happy to be there with her, and she'd instantly fallen in love with him. All Caldwell would say about Sam's mother was that she'd passed away, and that she and Logan had been good friends. He also mentioned that Logan had been the one to deliver his son, which made her inordinately pleased, until she saw the hint of sadness in his eyes that he'd tried to hide from her. She was curious, but she knew Steve Caldwell well enough to know that if he wanted her to know, he would TELL her, doctor's orders be damned! Sam was a breath of fresh air in an otherwise mysterious and confusing world, and she doted on the boy.

It felt like forever since she'd woken up in the infirmary with no memory, and she still had yet to remember anything for herself. It was frustrating, to say the least, and Heightmeyer had been hinting that she needed to try and prepare herself for the eventuality that she might never regain her memory. To that end, Logan had been relearning much of the ancient technology, and Sheppard had been re-teaching her to fly the jumpers; something she found to be a hoot!

She hadn't been allowed to return to active duty, however, despite her quick physical recovery, and THAT was incredibly difficult. She took long walks every day, but she still felt that overwhelming feeling of cabin-fever. Sheppard was off-world, and so unavailable to guard-dog her when Mitchell stumbled across her wandering around the east pier and decided to join her. They spent an enjoyable hour walking and talking, and getting generally reacquainted. She found herself enjoying his company and flirty charm. There was an easiness to being with him and she didn't feel the usual pressure to remember him. It was clear that they knew one another fairly well, but he didn't push her. He just let her be herself, which was very much appreciated. When the cool night air became just a little too chilly, he took it upon himself to escort her back to her quarters - it was the gentlemanly thing to do.

She was laughing uproariously at one of his stories when all good sense completely left him and he pulled her into a kiss. She found it not at all unpleasant, and felt only a momentary pang of guilt at kissing a man who wasn't Daniel. Mitchell was, in fact, a great kisser. She found herself responding to him - something she hadn't imagined possible, but all of a sudden, she had an overwhelming sense of _wrongness_ that quite took her breath away and she froze before pulling back to gape awkwardly at him. Mitchell looked down at her, instantly wanting to kick himself.

"I'm sorry, Logan... God, I swore to myself I wouldn't do that."

She was quick to reassure him with a hand on his shoulder. "No, I'm... fine... I just... I'm sorry..." she stammered. "I just..."

Neither of them were at all aware that Sheppard had come around the corner down the hall just in time to see Mitchell pull her into that kiss. He froze in place, shock, pain, fear, anger - all of those emotions tumbled around inside of him and he couldn't move.

"Never could resist your charm," Mitchell winced. "I know better, and I am sorry for taking advantage."

"I take it there's some history there?" she blinked up at him.

"A little," he shrugged.

"I see," she nodded. "But... we're okay, right? I mean, we're..."

"Friends," he smiled warmly. "And yes, we're okay... as long as I keep my lips to myself," he added.

"Someday you'll have to tell me about it," she smiled.

"Someday you'll remember, and you'll believe me when I say that we're okay," he countered.

"I believe you," she murmured. And she did.

"Good," he nodded. "Goodnight Logan."

"Goodnight Cameron," she replied.

She watched as he walked away, a look of uneasiness spreading across her face. Something didn't feel right, but she couldn't put her finger on it. At first she thought it might have something to do with Daniel, but she quickly discounted that notion. She'd been doing a good job of reminding herself that she and Daniel were both free agents. Heck, he was even involved with someone else! It was something else that was eating away at her. Mitchell was a great kisser, to be sure but... It had just felt WRONG to be kissing him, and it had nothing to do with rank or regs...

As she turned to go inside, she caught sight of Sheppard standing at the other end of the hallway. There was anger in his eyes, and something else, too. Pain? Of course she knew he never approved of anyone she dated or was even remotely interested in but... She'd never seen that expression on his face before. She was about to call out to him when Bates and Lorne came charging down the hall from the opposite direction. Her alarm turned to amusement as she listened to the two of them bickering good naturedly.

"Colonel Devane... Just the person we were looking for!" Bates announced.

"We need you in the gym, Ma'am," Lorne added.

"Need me for what?" she asked.

"You'll see, ma'am," Bates told her as both he and Lorne took an arm and began escorting her down the hall.

She looked back at Sheppard and called out, "You coming?"

He shrugged, "In a minute!" he answered brusquely.

She could hear the music blaring inside the gym before they got there. "What is this?" she asked warily.

"Officers' party, ma'am!" Bates replied. "Lorne needs you to show him how to dance."

"Actually, Bates needs your help with that, I'm smooth enough," Lorne countered.

Logan took in the crowd of people already inside and almost turned around, but Lorne and Bates had a secure hold on her. "Come on, ma'am... You've had enough stress, you need to have a little fun for a change!" said Bates.

She had to admit, everyone did look like they were having a great time, and she DID love a good party. Will Smith's "Switch" began playing over the sound system and she allowed them to pull her onto the dance floor. The three of them soon found their rhythm and began dancing in tandem.

Sheppard came in about ten minutes later to find she, Bates and Lorne still tearing up the dance floor. He smiled in spite of the scene he'd witnessed earlier. It was good to see her having some fun for a change. Fun that didn't include Daniel Jackson or Cameron Mitchell. He frowned again as the image of Mitchell kissing her flashed through his mind unbidden. No doubt Mitchell thought he had a chance with her now that her memory had gone M-I-A.

Logan saw him standing on the sidelines and waved to him. He waved back but showed no intention of joining her on the dance floor. Her mouth puckered into a pout, but Bates was soon spinning her around the floor and out of his view. He contented himself with a beer and sat petulantly at a table in the corner. He'd questioned his decision not to tell her about them for the hundredth time. She'd been struggling so hard to accept the changes she couldn't remember, and to deal with those changes. They'd gradually been spoon feeding her information about her life over the past five years and giving her time to process the information. He'd taken Heightmeyers' warnings to heart, having watched her struggle with each new revelation.

The truth about her relationship with Sheppard would be sure to have her reeling. Even now he didn't have the words to explain how their friendship had evolved into marriage between them. At the point where she was in her mind, she would have no concept of how the two of them could be anything other than the lifelong friends they'd always been. It killed him not being able to tell her yet. It had been torture not to hold her in his arms every night, not to touch her as a husband would a wife, not to make love to her... Most of all, it tore him up to see her with another man. Not just Daniel, but Mitchell now too!

While it had been difficult knowing how much she struggled and pined for Daniel, he'd also known that nothing would happen between them. She knew the truth about THAT relationship. But all of a sudden to have Mitchell enter the picture again? Anger and jealousy coursed through him as he thought about Mitchell kissing her. What was he supposed to do? Punch him out? Mitchell had no idea that she was already spoken for, but he couldn't help but be angry with him. And Logan... She would be furious, first, then she would be mortified to learn that she was kissing a man who WASN'T her husband! Of course that would be after she fully realized that Sheppard wasn't kidding and that the two of them were REALLY married. He knew now that he had no other choice. He HAD to tell her, whether or not she was ready to hear it. She would never forgive him if he let her continue to behave as though she were single. That is if she forgave him for not telling her about the two of them right from the start!

So caught up was he in his dark thoughts that he hadn't noticed two Athosian women making a beeline in his direction. Before he knew it, he was dragged onto the dance floor between them. He gallantly stayed on the floor, behaving as the perfect gentleman, but his heart really wasn't into it. Logan looked across the room and saw him dancing with not one, but TWO women. White hot anger sliced through her out of nowhere, startling her with its intensity. She stumbled a bit, but Bates steadied her.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, just tripped...Bates? Who are those two dancing with Sheppard?"

Bates looked across the room. "They're Athosian, ma'am...I'm pretty sure you knew one of them before, but I can't recall her name. Do they look familiar to you?"

"I'm not sure..." she said sullenly.

Logan's mood had darkened considerably since seeing the Athosian women, particularly the one called Kerin, fawning all over Sheppard. It only made matters worse that she didn't understand WHY she was feeling so angry and hostile toward those women. Girls and then women had been fawning over Sheppard for as long as she could remember and it had never really bothered her before. Sheppard, on the other hand, usually came un-nutted when men tried to get close to her. He'd never needed to be appointed as her personal guard dog by her father, he'd taken that role on for himself when they were still kids. For the most part, she hadn't minded so much, except when it was someone she REALLY liked, or in Daniel's case loved.

Why, why, _**why**_ did it bother her to see him with THOSE women? Bates had said he thought she'd known one of them before. Perhaps she hadn't liked them for some reason? Glaring at them across the room, she was pretty sure she didn't like them NOW. She shook her head and tried to ignore them, throwing herself back into the party. Soon enough though, she couldn't focus on anything but them. Logan gave up and called it a night. fuming quietly to herself, she excused herself to Bates and Lorne, then headed back to her quarters. Sheppard saw her leave and began to extricate himself from the two women who'd been monopolizing his time.

Finally free, he sped to her quarters. He'd seen the look on her face when she saw him with the two Athosian women, but he'd felt no satisfaction in knowing that it bothered her every bit as much as it had him to see her with Mitchell. He wasn't about payback or retribution where she was concerned. It gave him some measure of comfort to know that she at least felt territorial when it came to him, but he wasn't happy that she was upset, and more than likely, confused as hell. By the time he reached her quarters she had built up a heady rage. She'd thought that some spring cleaning and rearranging her sparse furnishings might help alleviate her negative feelings, but it sure wasn't working. As he walked in the door he narrowly missed having a book thrown at his head. He turned as the book flew through the open doorway and hit the wall.

"Hey!" he yelped.

Logan wheeled around, fire in her eyes. "Well maybe if you KNOCKED I would have known you were there!" she barked.

"Sparks, we need to talk..."

"Talk? You wanna TALK?" she shouted.

"Yeah... Uh... What the hell's _wrong_ with you?!"

"Wrong with _me_?! What's wrong with _you_?!" she snapped, feeling guilty over her anger at him for no good reason.

"What did *I* do?" he stared at her, more than a little confused.

"Nothing!"

"Nothing... Nothing?! God, you make me dizzy, woman!"

"I think it's your two lady friends who did that, Colonel! What's the matter, couldn't decide which one you wanted so you made time with both of them?!" she hissed.

"Is _that_ what has you so upset?" he asked.

"I'm NOT upset!"

"Yes, you _are_ , now what's _wrong_?" he demanded.

"What ISN'T wrong?! Everything is wrong. I hate not remembering my life, I hate wondering whether or not I'll EVER remember on my own, I hate not being able to go back on full duty. I hate that I..." she trailed off before saying what was truly on her mind.

"That you what?" he prodded.

"That I... feel..."

"What Sparks?" he eyed her expectantly.

"When I saw you out in the hall earlier... You looked like someone stole your most prized possession..." she told him.

"I saw you with Mitchell..." he said through gritted teeth.

"You've seen me with men before..." she reminded him.

"I _know_." His anger began to boil again.

"Then why did it bother you so much? And why the HELL did it bother ME so much to see you with those two women? "Why do I feel so... so..."

"What?!" he demanded.

"So jealous!" she snapped. "So damn jealous! Why did it feel so disloyal to let Cameron Mitchell kiss me?!"

"Disloyal to whom?" he asked.

"YOU!" she cried. "Disloyal and WRONG, and... and... _why_ , John?! Why do I feel this surge of electricity when I'm near you?! Why do you suddenly smell **_soooo_** good?! Why do I feel this, this, this urge to rip your clothes off and..."

"Because you're my WIFE, dammit!" he barked.

They stared open-mouthed at one another for a moment, frozen in shock. He, that he would have blurted out something so important in such a way and she, that he would even joke about something like that.

"That's not funny."

"It wasn't meant to be," he replied.

"Then why would you say that?" she stared at him, eyes wide in disbelief.

"I didn't mean to... not like that..." he sighed.

A look of horror came over her face and she began to back away from him. She was putting the pieces together.

"Logan..."

She shook her head. "No... How can we be..." her back hit the wall and she slid down to the floor, her eyes filled with pain and shock.

"I'll explain everything," he began to move towards her.

"NO!" she cried.

"Come on Sparks..."

"NO!" she cried, jumping to her feet again and dashing past him and out the door.

"Logan!" he called, but she was gone.

Sheppard searched every place he could think of to try and find her, growing more and more frantic as he searched. Then it hit him. "She wouldn't..." he groaned as he realized that it would be exactly what she would do. He keyed his mic and radioed the jumper bay.

"You just missed her, sir. She took off about two minutes ago."

Sheppard cursed and headed straight for the jumper bay after notifying Caldwell that he'd be taking a jumper to go after a highly upset Logan. Without giving specifics, he told Caldwell that she had learned something new that evening that she found a little overwhelming. He hopped into the nearest jumper and went in pursuit.

Logan struggled to keep a tight lid on her emotions while she fought to control the jumper. She was upset and angry but she didn't have a deathwish. Tears streamed uncontrollably down her face as she flew toward the mainland. She couldn't wrap her head around what Sheppard had blurted out in the heat of the moment. How could it be true? They'd been friends forever, how did they go from friendship to marriage? And **_how_** could he not tell her?!

Without quite knowing how she'd made it without crashing, Logan landed the jumper on the secluded beach she and Sheppard always used when they went surfing. She had to wonder, given what she'd just learned, what else they did at this beach. Shaking her head, she hit the ramp release and ran out onto the sand. She stood there for a moment, looking at the moonlit waves before collapsing to the sand and sobbing her heart out.

She knew what Sheppard told her was true. She was his wife. He was her husband... She'd kissed not one, but TWO men who were _not_ her husband since waking up in the infirmary. Guilt and anger washed over her as she realized the enormity of what she'd done. It didn't matter to her that she'd done it unknowingly, there was a part of her that KNEW it was wrong. It had FELT wrong at the time and now she knew why. She thought back to the expression on Sheppard's face when he saw Mitchell kiss her earlier. It had torn him up. How in the world was she supposed to live with that?!

A moment later she heard the unmistakable sound of another jumper approaching the shore. Sheppard. There was no doubt in her mind. It hadn't taken him long to figure out where she'd gone. Then again, it never had. He'd always been there when she needed him, and vice-versa. The problem now was how could she face him? She was angry with him alright, but she was more concerned about the pain he was in. She would never consciously hurt him, but he _was_ hurting nonetheless. It was time to face the music. Time to get some answers. She stood up and braced herself.

He ran out of the jumper as soon as he landed and came to stand by her side. "Sparks?"

"Hi..." she sniffled.

"I'm so sorry... I'm sorry I just blurted it out that way, I never wanted to..." he trailed off and plopped down onto the sand.

"I know," she nodded, not quite able to meet his eyes.

"I know you must have a million questions," he looked up at her.

"Understatement," she mumbled, and slowly slid down to land on his lap. "Married...?"

"I'll tell you anything you want to know," he promised, his arms going around her.

"You _have to_ tell me how that came to be," she told him, her tone full of wonder.

"We've been married less than a year... Remember me telling you about when we went back to Earth, when Dad died?"

She nodded, then reached into her shirt and pulled out her tags. "Your mothers' ring," she said.

He nodded.

"Dr. Beckett asked me about it when I woke up... I was still pretty foggy and didn't recognize it at the time, and I just said 'Mom,' and I was going to ask you about it later, but I forgot..."

"As for how we got here... Think back, Sparks... Even before either of us came here, can you remember a time when you might have wondered 'what if'?"

Logan thought back. There were several times she'd wondered that very thing. The first time had been when he'd planted her very first kiss on her. Those moments had always been fleeting, of course, as she quickly discounted any notion of him EVER seeing her that way. "A few times... I never thought you would see ME that way though."

"I never thought you'd see me that way either but... When I thought you were... gone... That whole year I felt like the biggest and best part of me was missing and that I'd never be whole again. Then when you came back... When I saw you standing here in Atlantis... I can't even tell you..." tears streamed down his face as he recounted the memories to her. "Oddly enough, it was one of those women tonight, Kerin, that prompted you to tell me that your feelings had changed."

"No wonder she set me off," she cracked.

"How do you mean?"

"John... I don't... I was having all these... _feelings_ whenever you came near me, or looked at me, or said my name... I didn't understand why I'd get all hot and fluttery... It was so confusing..."

"I'm so sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

"I... I'm furious with you... but I think I know why you didn't..." she admitted. She didn't like it, but she understood it.

"I'm sorry, baby... I'm so sorry..." he murmured.

"I can't... I don't know what to do with... I don't know how to reconcile what I remember with what you've told me... I mean, it makes sense. It makes perfect sense, actually. I just..."

"I'm not going anywhere, Sparks...Take all the time you need to process..." he assured her.

"I'm really tired of processing..." she sighed.

"I'm sure."

She looked up at him, her heart turning over as she saw the love in his eyes. She reached up and stroked his cheek softly. An electric charge coursed through her and she quickly drew back her hand.

"You're safe, Sparks... I'm not going to rush you, I'm not going to pressure you."

She took a deep breath and leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her again and just held her.


	37. Chapter 37

It felt good, for both of them, to have everything out in the open. "There's nothing else, right? You're not going to tell me two months from now that we have a kid or something?" she teased.

He grinned happily down at her and shook his head. "No...That's it... The big stuff anyway."

"I...uh...God this feels so weird," she shook her head.

"Weird?"

"I just... There's this part of me that still feels like I'm cheating on Daniel, but... I KNOW I'm not... And now I know that what I've been feeling for you actually makes sense..."

"Give it time, Sparks."

"Easy to say," she sighed.

"I know, and I wish I could make everything easier for you..."

"Just please don't hold anything important back anymore?" she pleaded.

"I promise. By the way... Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"What prompted you to give Mitchell the time of day?" he asked.

Her face reddened and guilt washed over her as she remembered that Sheppard had seen them together. "Oh God! John, I'm so sorry!" she cried.

"Easy, easy... I'm not mad... Well, not at _you_. I shouldn't be at him either; it's not like he knows about us... No one does, but..." he shrugged. "That sure didn't keep me from wanting to zat him... or worse..."

"I'm really sorry."

"It's alright... I understand...Uh... Or I will... You gave him the boot once before, so why..." he trailed off.

"Actually it was Doc Heightmeyer's idea..." she cringed.

"That **QUACK**!" he barked.

"She thought it might help me get past any residual feelings for Daniel..." she chuckled.

"The woman's a menace!" he declared.

"I'll be sure to let her know I won't be doing that anymore."

"Make sure you tell Mitchell, too!"

They talked for another hour, then packed it in and set out for the city, each in their own jumper. On the way back, Sheppard explained to Caldwell via private, secure channel, that he'd found her and they'd spent all that time on the mainland talking through everything that had set her off. He assured Caldwell that she was feeling better and wouldn't be taking any more sudden jumper trips. He also wanted to make sure that no one would crowd her with too much attention and too many questions when she arrived.

Unfortunately, Heightmeyer didn't get the message. That, or she didn't care, as she was demanding that Logan come to her office the next morning for an emergency session. After assuring her that she was fine now and that she would stop by, Logan managed to get away from her long enough to go back to her quarters to take a shower.

TWO WEEKS LATER

"Is it just me, or does this place look familiar somehow?" Logan asked with a sour look on her face.

"Proculus. I didn't want to say anything, but I noticed that too," replied McKay. "I guess you went over all that footage from that previous mission, huh?"

"Yes, I did," she nodded. "I mean, I went over everything I could in all the down time I had. And I totally agree with your assessment of... everything related to _that_... But this? This is damn creepy, Rodney... A village, no sign of violence or mass exodus, but no people?"

"Maybe they're hiding? Could be that they thought we were the Wraith?" he ventured.

"I dunno, we've been here long enough for someone to see us. You getting any unusual readings?"

"No, I got nothing," he shook his head, his expression decidedly uneasy. He'd been thrilled to be loaned to Logan for this mission, but now was having some minor second thoughts.

"Okay then, we'll give it another thirty minutes or so and if we still don't make contact, we're outta here!" Logan declared.

She dispersed her team to search the village and surrounding area, while she helped McKay with his equipment. Logan had been back on full duty for two weeks now, and at the top of her game. She was no closer to recovering her memory, but she was getting to the point where she could almost accept that she would never get her memory back. Sheppard had filled her in on every tiny detail of their relationship, both before and after they'd become lovers and then husband and wife. It wasn't quite the same as remembering it for herself, but it was as close as she was likely to get at this point.

She'd been able to put her old feelings for Daniel into the proper perspective and get past the pain of what had happened between them. Again, Sheppard was a huge part of her being able to heal. Her love for Sheppard grew daily, by leaps and bounds, and she had to wonder how she could have ever thought that she'd be able to share her life with anyone but him.

It was a constant source of amazement that no one in Pegasus knew, or even guessed, the true nature of their relationship. She felt like it was written all over her face every time she saw him. It didn't give either of them pleasure or satisfaction that they were able to keep their secret; they hated that they couldn't share their happiness with the friends and colleagues, but there was no way they could make their relationship public and still remain where they were. The subterfuge was a necessary evil, for the time being.

"Whoa-ho!" McKay exclaimed.

"What?"

"I just read a massive power surge somewhere around here..." he said, looking around.

"Power surge... You don't suppose this is a Genii village, do you?"

"I don't think so... The readings are different than any power source they have, but..."

"But what?"

"I have seen this signature before..." he glanced at her, clearly wary.

"Where?"

"Uh... I can't remember..." he trailed off, frustrated.

"Rodney..."

"Lemme think!"

A moment later, there was a rumbling, like thunder, only much louder, and then the ground around them began to move. They were both thrown to the ground with the force of the quaking, and McKay was knocked unconscious when his head hit a rock. The shaking continued while Logan crawled over to McKay and began checking his wound. A moment later, the shaking stopped as suddenly as it hard started, but Logan was momentarily stunned by a bright white light flashing before them. A figure stepped out of the light and gazed down at her with a self-righteous glare of superiority emblazoned on her face. Logan felt like she should know the woman standing above her, know her and despise her, but she had no idea why.

"Something I can do for you?" Logan asked icily.

"Do you not know me, Logan Devane?"

The way the woman said her name set Logan's back up. "Actually, I don't."

"That's not entirely true."

"Okay, so fill me in... If I had to hazard a guess, I'd say you were one of the Ascended."

"I am."

"And? So? Well? _What_?" she prodded.

"I was very surprised to see you here."

"Why? And why would you care?" Logan eyed her suspiciously.

"I care more than you know."

"Clearly. The Ascended don't ordinarily show themselves to us lowly mortals..." she gasped as it hit her who she must be. "Athar...?" she hissed.

"So you do remember."

"Only what I've been told. What do you want?" Logan eyed her suspiciously.

"I want to help you."

"Since when?!" she scoffed. "From what I've heard you have always refused to help us."

"I cannot help with other matters, but I can help with this..."

Something about the way she said that made Logan's skin crawl.

"You want to remember your past, do you not?"

"Of course I do, but..."

"Then do so..."

Another flash of light made Logan turn away and then she grabbed her head as a wave of staggering pain came over her and images jumbled together in her mind. They flashed so quickly in succession that she couldn't make any sense of them, and all the while, she thought her head would explode.

"STOP!" came the command from a more recognizable female voice. Logan opened her eyes long enough to register the form of another Ascended being, but the pain was so intense she couldn't focus for long.

"Janet..." she cried.

McKay opened his eyes to find Athar standing over Logan, who was screaming in pain, holding her head as she lay on her side. "Logan!" he cried, pain shooting through his own head and he fell back again.

"Stop this Athar!"

"She wants to remember..."

"Not this way! It's not your place!" Janet appeared to draw closer to Athar, threatening in her stance.

"She wanted me to help... Always wanting me to help... She turned him against me..." Athar was almost maniacal by then.

"Leave her be!" Janet ordered.

"No... she must see..."

Janet shed her human form and began to glow brighter and brighter until McKay couldn't make out which woman was which, not that he'd been able to see that clearly anyway. She lashed out with her mind and managed to sever the connection between Logan and Athar. At that point, Athar lashed back at Janet in a fury, and the battle was on. Logan finally stopped screaming and was now rocking back and forth, still holding her head. McKay dragged himself across the ground toward her.

"Logan?" he covered her body with his own to shield her from the glowing beings battling near her. "Logan, come on..."

"Make it stop," she begged through clenched teeth.

"I...can't... Hold on, Logan." he held her as she rocked, trying to comfort her as best he could.

Somewhere in the distance he heard Bates' voice calling to them. It cost him dearly to call back to them. "Here!" he shouted, the pain making him somewhat nauseous.

Bates and Lorne came at a run, staring in confusion at the 'light-show' bouncing here and there before their eyes. "What happened?" Bates demanded, kneeling by Logan's side.

"Athar..." McKay said, still covering Logan's body with his own.

"What?! She attacked you?" Lorne gasped, anger etched across his face.

"There was an earthquake or something... and then she went after Colonel Devane..."

"What'd she do to her?!" Bates asked, trying to see where Logan was hurt.

"I don't know..."

There was a loud clap overhead and the sky darkened considerably, but the struggle on the ground went on unabated. A moment later, the two spheres of light were thrown apart and, the one they assumed was Athar looked like she was encased in... something... that prevented her from moving. Janet Fraser retook human form and stood by as the others took Athar and vanished. Logan's men stared up into the sky as if expecting something else to happen. Janet walked over to McKay and knelt down.

"Out of the way, Doctor," she ordered.

McKay reluctantly rolled off of her, but stayed close by.

"Logan? Logan...Listen to my voice."

"Do something!" McKay shouted.

All of a sudden, time seemed to stand still. Only Janet was aware of what was going on around her, while the others appeared frozen in time. She turned to face the two glowing beings who materialized out of nowhere.

"Let me help her," she demanded.

"It is forbidden."

"So is what Athar did to her... Why should she have to suffer at the hands of one of our own, doesn't she... and ALL these people, don't they suffer enough every day at the hands of the Wraith because we so-called enlightened beings refuse to clean up the mess we made?"

"It is not like that."

"It IS like that!" she shouted. "The Ancients were at least partially responsible for the evolution of the Wraith and what did they do about it? They ran away! They ascended and left the people of this galaxy to face the Wraith alone and unguarded. People they put here themselves! Now... this woman did nothing to deserve what Athar did to her, what she shouldn't have been allowed to do in the first place, so FIX IT! Or allow me to..."

There was a blinding flash of light and then silence. Logan's team, who'd been frozen, suddenly fell forward to the ground.

"Whoa!" McKay cried as he stopped himself from landing on top of Logan. He looked around in confusion.

"What happened?" asked Bates.

"Where's Dr. Fraser?" McKay looked around frantically.

"She was just here!" Bates replied.

McKay checked Logan's vitals to make sure she was alright since she'd appeared to suddenly lose consciousness. "We need to get her back to Atlantis NOW!" he shouted, picking up her limp body and heading for the gate.

Bates ran ahead to dial the gate. Along with his IDC, he sent instructions to have a medical team standing by. A few moments later, Caldwell gasped when he saw McKay carry Logan through the event horizon.

"What happened?" he demanded.

"We don't really know," he replied.

The medical team rushed into the gateroom with a gurney, where McKay gingerly deposited the still unconscious Logan. He ran behind them as they hurried her to the infirmary where Dr. Beckett waited.

Out in the hall, Bates and McKay tried to explain, as best they could, what had taken place on the planet. They told him what they could about Athar and the sudden reappearance of Janet Fraser, who apparently had stepped in to stop whatever it was Athar was doing to Logan. It had become clear to them that somehow time had stopped, at least momentarily, for them and that something had taken place between Fraser and probably "The Others" when she stepped in to try and help Logan.

"One minute she was writhing on the ground in pain, with Fraser bending over her, the next Fraser was gone and Logan was unconscious," McKay finished.

"That's when we came back here, sir," Bates added.

In the exam room, Beckett could find no physical reason for Logan's unconscious state. All of her vital signs were stable, which was a good sign. Her brain waves were somewhat elevated and erratic but otherwise normal. There was simply no reason for her not to wake up. A sudden commotion in the room next door startled him and he ran to check on the source of the noise. He was somewhat startled to find a somewhat embarrassed Janet Fraser frantically trying to find something to cover her naked body. He quickly pulled off the white coat covering his uniform and handed it to her, all the while keeping his eyes averted.

"Dr. Fraser...? How the bloody hell...?" he stuttered.

"Thank you Carson," she said. "Where is Logan?"

"Next door, doctor... How did you... Never mind, I can use all the help I can get!" he led her next door then sent a nurse to find something more for her to wear besides his coat.

Fraser examined Logan carefully, assuring herself that all was well before turning to Beckett to explain what she could.

"But she's going to be alright...?" Caldwell asked.

"She'll be fine... She IS fine. She needs this down time to be able to process all the memories that have been restored," Fraser replied.

"Why did Athar do that to her?" Caldwell asked.

Fraser shrugged. "Jealousy, perhaps; revenge for some perceived slight... It doesn't really matter, she never should have been able to attack her."

"Agreed," Caldwell's jaw tightened in anger.

"Dr. Fraser... Pardon my impudence but... What are you doing here?" Weir ventured cautiously.

"Well, you know from Daniel Jackson that it's possible for ascended beings to retake human form..." she began.

"Yes, but..."

"I couldn't stand by and do nothing... I never could."

"We can't thank you enough for that..."

At that moment, Sheppard came hurtling into the infirmary, fear and anger in his eyes. "Logan?!" he asked.

"She'll be fine, Colonel," Beckett assured him. "Thanks to Dr. Fraser here," he grinned.

"Thank you... Dr. Fraser?" he asked perplexed, stunned to see her fully human.

"Long story, Colonel. Logan's still out, but you can go in and sit with her," she smiled warmly.

"Thanks!" he said and disappeared into Logan's room.

A moment later, Carter, Daniel and Teal'c burst through the door and gaped at Fraser.

"Janet?" Carter asked.

"Hello Sam, Daniel, Teal'c..." she smiled.

"It's really you?" Carter asked.

"Really and truly," she laughed.

The three of them came forward and took turns embracing her and peppering her with questions.

Weir returned to her duties and Caldwell to his, leaving the reunited comrades to reminisce and catch up. Beckett went back to work, checking on the other patients he had and let Sheppard have some privacy with Logan.

In her room, Sheppard leaned over, brushed her hair back and kissed her forehead softly, a single tear streaming down his face. He buried his face against her belly with one arm draped protectively across her body.

Sheppard was sound asleep when Logan finally began to stir, then awaken. She was somewhat disoriented, but she knew it was Sheppard there, with his head resting against her belly. She reached down and gently worked her fingers through the unruly chocolate brown hair. Sheppard snapped instantly awake.

"Sparks?" he croaked.

"Hey flyboy..." she whispered.

"How ya feelin?" he leaned over and kissed her softly on the mouth before she could answer.

"Like someone's been inside my head rearranging things..."

"Are you in pain?" he asked, deeply concerned.

"My head hurts..."

"Is it bad? I can get the doc..."

Logan grinned up at him. "Well, it doesn't hurt as bad as that time you made me drink that awful jungle juice you concocted at McMurdo..." she teased.

"Hey, that was good stuff..." he stopped suddenly as it hit him that THAT particular memory had been one of many she'd lost.

"Logan... honey are you..." he trailed off, not daring to hope.

"I remember..." she smiled.

"That's great!" he exclaimed, hugging her tightly against him.

"What the hell happened to me?" she asked.

"You want me to take that one, Colonel?"

They turned to find Fraser standing in the doorway.

"Janet?" Logan gasped.

"It's me, Logan," she came forward and hugged Logan.

"You're... back?" she asked incredulously.

"If Daniel can do it, why can't I?" she grinned.

"I'm so glad you did!" she laughed. "Did you... do this? Give me back my memory, I mean?"

"Not really..."

"But she's the one who made sure you were okay," Sheppard pointed out.

"How..." she gasped as she remembered encountering Athar. "Athar did this?" she asked.

"Not out of the goodness of her heart, I assure you."

"She was mad at me," Logan nodded.

"Yes. This was an attack, designed to inflict as much pain as she possibly could."

"What do you mean?" Logan's eyes widened.

"The sudden onslaught of all those memories, all at once... It was too much for your mind to process in an instant. There was no way for you to be able to sort through it all in any cohesive manner. She did it to drive you insane."

Logan stared from Fraser to Sheppard, who was barely containing his anger and hostility. "I thought she wasn't allowed to do things like that."

"She's not," Fraser assured them. "And she's been dealt with."

"By the good doctor herself," Sheppard added.

"So, you were sent back as punishment?"

"No. And it was the Others who actually set everything right in your mind..."

"With some gentle persuasion, of course," Sheppard grinned at her.

"You needed to be almost in a coma-like state while the memories sorted themselves out... The Others did that and sped your healing."

"Imagine that..." Logan breathed.

"Only because Janet insisted," Sheppard told her.

"Were you... Were you SENT back or did you choose to retake human form?" Logan asked.

"It was my choice. I never could just sit around and do nothing to help... Especially where my friends are concerned."

"Thank you...For what you did to stop Athar, and for coming back to us. We need you, Janet... And I've really missed you!" Logan threw her arms around Fraser and hugged her tightly.

"It's good to be back!"

"I assume you and Daniel have already been comparing notes?" she asked.

"We have," Fraser confirmed.

"How long have I been out?"

"Too long!" Sheppard said emphatically.

"Over a day," Fraser said. "Oh, and just so you two know... there are a lot of things I can't remember from the time I was ascended, but... YOU two, I DO remember."

"Excuse me?" Sheppard said warily.

"I know the two of you are TOGETHER, in every sense of the word."

"Janet..."

Fraser held up a hand to stop her. "I think it's great, and your secret is safe with me," she assured them.

"Thanks," Sheppard hugged her.

"It was worth it just for the hug!" she teased.

"Thank you, Janet."

"What are friends for?" Fraser smiled. "Now...You still need some rest, Colonel Devane, so no getting out of bed until either Dr. Beckett or myself say so...No arguments!"

"Fine..." Logan grumbled.

TWO MONTHS LATER

It seemed as though everything had finally returned to normal. Logan was back on full active duty, her memory fully intact. Missions went on, as always. Janet Fraser had returned to Earth to retrieve her daughter, Cassandra, and be fully reinstated in the Air Force. Since Carolyn Lamm was now the CMO at the SGC, Fraser had been assigned to Genoa, where SG-1 was stationed in the Pegasus Galaxy, much to everyone's delight. Carter had been ecstatic to have Fraser back and to have Cassandra there with them.

Logan and Sheppard blissfully settled back into (secretly) married life, juggling their nights between his quarters and hers, astoundingly able to keep their secret in such a close-knit community as Atlantis.

Both Daniel and Teal'c were becoming more frequent visitors to Lantea as time wore on. Daniel and Kitah were getting more serious, and there were even whispers of an impending marriage between the two. Likewise, Teal'c and Teyla were very nearly inseparable when not on duty. Ry'ac, the son of Teal'c, had even paid a special visit to Atlantis to visit Teal'c and meet Teyla. The two of them hit it off famously and soon the threesome looked like a real family.

Both Logan and Sheppard were pleased with their relationship, though to differing degrees. Having known Teal'c for so long, Logan knew that Teyla was the perfect woman for him. She understood the commitment and sacrifice Teal'c made to continue protecting Earth's and Pegasus' interests. She knew the demands of being out there on the front lines, and she would not resent the time spent away from her in defense of their peoples. Likewise, Teal'c found the same qualities in her. Fortunately, neither of them were in the military, thereby not governed by the same regs that kept others apart, or hiding their true feelings. They were free to pursue romance without fear of repurcussions, and Logan couldn't have been happier for them.

"You're a hopeless romantic, you know?" Sheppard had teased her.

"What's wrong with wanting our friends to be as happy as we are?" she purred.

"Nothing... But if you're not careful, you're going to end up a bigger matchmaker than Carter!"

Logan laughed, knowing those were big shoes to fill. "Come to think of it... Isn't it about time Elizabeth found someone..."

"Whoa Sparks! I was only kidding... sort of... about the matchmaking thing, but you're really starting to sound like a yenta..."

"Hey!" she swatted his behind playfully.


	38. Chapter 38

It'd been a long time since Logan had been in such a fierce fire-fight as the one she and her team were engaged in now. They hadn't expected to encounter the Wraith on P2X-755, yet another Ancient City they'd discovered. They had been sent on a simple recon mission to determine the condition of the Ancient City and the viability of setting up another base. There had been no sign of the Wraith when they'd first sent the MALP through three days earlier, nor in the days since. Yet, here they were.

Had it not been for the personal shield devices McKay had perfected and given them for testing, Logan and her team would be Wraith-fodder right now. The stunner blasts had come unexpectedly out of nowhere, and they'd been forced to take cover before they could reach the control room.

She'd counted ten Wraith, so far, and could only hope there weren't more once they got the upper hand against these. They'd taken out four already, so that made the odds a little better. THAT and the fact that they were wearing personal shields, which would prevent any real injury should the Wraith actually get their hands on them.

Their ammo supply was depleting pretty rapidly since it took so much to bring down a single Wraith and keep him down. They couldn't call for back up, since the gate had already shut down and there was no way for them to reach the DHD at the moment, so they had no choice but to continue to fight and hope they didn't run out. Three more went down at once, and Logan ordered her team to press their advantage so they could reach the control room.

Two more went down as they mounted the stairs, leaving only a single Wraith in their way. She saw him lunge at Bates with enough force to knock him backwards off the balcony, but she knew the inertial dampeners would keep Bates from even feeling the fall. Logan emptied the rest of her P-90 clip into the Wraith as he turned to come for her next. He finally went down when he came within two feet of her, and Bates, having charged back up the stairs, pumped a few more rounds into him just to make sure he was gone.

"Dial the gate!" Logan ordered.

Bates went to the DHD and dialed home. As soon as the event horizon established, Logan keyed her mike. "Atlantis, this is Devane. We need backup, NOW, to search and secure the city, as well as more ammo."

"What's your situation, Colonel?" asked Caldwell.

"There were Wraith here, sir. We took out ten of them just to get to the control room, but we don't know if there are any more elsewhere in the city. Our ammo is seriously depleted, but thanks to the shield devices, my team is unharmed. We could use that back up now, sir," she finished breathlessly.

"Understood, they're on their way. Caldwell out."

Bates shut down the gate, and they all took up defensive positions around the control room, watching and waiting for another attack. Within three minutes, an incoming wormhole was established and five SG teams poured through from Atlantis, including Sheppard's team. After supplying them with fresh ammo, and a quick discussion of strategy, the six teams set about searching and securing the city. The gate was left open for as long as possible, so additional teams could be sent through at a moment's notice, if needed, and so Caldwell and Weir could hear everything that was going on.

After several hours, their search was almost complete. This was a much smaller city than any of the others, so it didn't take nearly as long to search it as it had the others. They didn't encounter any other Wraith until they'd reached the fourth and final level of the city. Logan pulled Sheppard out of the way and stepped directly into the blast of a stunner weapon she'd seen fired from down the hall. She was protected by a personal shield, whereas Sheppard was not, she reminded him when he glared at her reproachfully.

What appeared to be a single Wraith kept firing continuous blasts with his stunner, trying to keep them pinned back.

"I get the feeling he doesn't want us to come down there and see what he's been up to!" Sheppard shouted.

"I think you're right!" Logan replied.

"So, you know this means we HAVE to, right?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Yeah... Me first!" she shouted and then darted down the hall, firing her own weapon at him.

The Wraith retreated behind a column to avoid her shots, allowing Sheppard and Ronon to follow her without fear of being stunned. When they drew closer, the Wraith lunged out from behind the column and was immediately hit by shots from all three weapons. He went down, but continued to struggle to get back to his feet. Ronon emptied his gun into the Wraith's head until he stopped moving for good.

Once the noise died down, they could all hear the distinct sound of a baby crying.

"What the hell...?" Sheppard murmured.

The three of them ran to a door at the end of the hall and skidded to a halt in front of what could only be described as an incubator. Inside, there was a tiny, squirming bundle wrapped in blankets and crying at the top of its lungs. Sheppard nudged Logan toward it first.

"Why me?" she glowered at him.

"You're better with babies than we are," he grinned slyly.

"Liar!" she snorted.

Nevertheless, she stepped forward and reached down to pick up the screaming infant. As she lifted it, the blanket shifted and she caught a glimpse of its face and gasped out loud.

"What?" Sheppard asked, stepping forward to see.

Logan held on to the infant, but looked decidedly uncomfortable as she turned the protesting baby toward Sheppard and Ronon. Both men stopped in their tracks and looked at each other uncertainly.

"It's a..." Sheppard trailed off.

"Wraith!" Dex finished for him.

"Oh my God..." Logan muttered, wanting to put the infant down but somehow unwilling to.

A moment later Teyla, Bates and Lorne came running down the hall and into the room.

"What is happening...?" Teyla began.

"A baby?!" Bates asked.

Lorne froze, the first of them to notice the infant's unmistakeable lineage. "A WRAITH baby."

No one had offered to take the child from Logan's arms, so she continued to hold the wailing, squirming infant.

"Uh... Okay..." keying his mike. "Atlantis, this is Sheppard..."

A moment later they heard Caldwell's voice respond.

"We uh...we need Beckett here to... make some assessments..."

"Do you have injured?" he asked.

"No sir...we have...that is we FOUND...something..."

Caldwell looked over at Weir. "Is it just me or does he sound a little freaked out?"

"No, he does..." Weir replied.

"What is it, Colonel?" Caldwell asked.

"Well, sir... It's a... baby," Sheppard stammered a reply.

Caldwell and Weir exchanged shocked glances. "Say again?" Weir asked.

"A baby," Sheppard repeated.

"Can't you just bring it back to Atlantis?" she asked.

"Negative... At least not until Beckett sees it and...clears it..."

"What's wrong with it?" Caldwell asked, wondering to himself why they didn't refer to the baby as a him or her.

"It's a... Wraith baby, sir..." Sheppard replied.

"We'll send him right out," Caldwell responded.

"Oh and sir?"

"Yes, Colonel?"

"Could you maybe have him bring some formula or something... I think it's... hungry."

Everyone who heard that cringed.

"Understood."

Beckett arrived five minutes later, baby formula in tow. Rather than take the infant from Logan, he simply stuck a baby bottle in her hand and began pulling out his instruments.

"Go ahead Luv, I'll have an easier time examining the child if it's not squirming about," he smiled encouragingly.

Logan shrugged, knowing no one was about to trade places with her, and took a seat in a nearby chair. She pulled the child closer and placed the tip of the bottle near its mouth. After a few seconds, the child caught on and greedily latched onto the bottle and began eating voraciously. It settled in calmly, molding itself comfortably into Logan's arms. Beckett waited a moment and then cautiously started loosening the blankets around it so he could begin his examination. The child didn't fuss or even raise an eyebrow as Beckett poked and prodded, content to lay in Logan's arms and eat.

"Well, we can stop calling it an *it* and start calling her a girl..." he announced.

"A girl..." Sheppard muttered.

"Come on now, all of you...We know from past experience that the wee ones don't feed on humans, so we're all perfectly safe." Beckett scolded.

"Still..." Sheppard began warily.

"What the hell were they doing with a baby... here?" Lorne asked.

"Good question," Sheppard agreed.

"We have found no others within the city... They were, perhaps, a family group?" Teyla offered.

"There were no females... OTHER females," Bates pointed out.

The baby finished off the bottle and began crying for more.

"Hungry little thing..." Logan observed.

Beckett reached into his bag and pulled out a second bottle, handing it to Logan. She immediately put the bottle to the infant's mouth and she began hungrily draining that one immediately.

"What do we do now?" Lorne asked.

None of them appeared very comfortable with the notion of having a Wraith in Atlantis, albeit a very small Wraith, but they couldn't very well leave the infant alone somewhere.

"Well, we're going to have to take her back with us," Beckett announced.

"You better clear that with Caldwell, Doc." Sheppard advised him.

"Why don't you go clear it with him, while I finish checking her over?" Beckett countered.

He looked down at Logan, who appeared more comfortable now. She nodded and smiled to assure him that she was fine. Sheppard, Bates, Teyla, Lorne and Dex left them there and went about their duties.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"She needs a name," Logan announced.

"Oh God, you're _bonding_ with it," Sheppard groaned.

"I am not!" she protested. "But we can't keep calling her 'she' or 'her' or 'it'... Besides, YOU'RE the one always naming the Wraith we've captured!"

"Three! I've named three!"

"Because you needed to call them SOMETHING... We need to call HER something."

Sheppard looked at her, trying to gauge any unspoken feelings she might be developing for the infant they'd found. "She's not like Sammy, you know?" he said seriously.

"I know that. But she IS just a baby... Right now she's completely innocent."

Sheppard winced at that. Even if she were just an infant, he had a hard time reconciling the words Wraith and innocence in the same sentence.

"Come on, John, I know you have more compassion than that. She can't help her bloodlines any more than you or I can. And maybe, just maybe, we'll have a chance to keep her from becoming like the others of her kind."

"If Beckett's suspicions turn out to be right, maybe we can. But that's a BIG maybe, sweetheart."

"I realize that. But if he's right, then we have real hope for turning things around, don't we?"

"Maybe, but that's not likely in our lifetime," he reminded her.

"But our kids... Assuming that when we have kids we'll all be allowed to stay here in Pegasus, of course."

Sheppard smiled at the thought. He'd always wanted kids, but had never given much serious thought to it before he and Logan got together. He'd never tried to picture, before, what they might be like, or look like... Now it was easy for him to picture them. (Yes, he wanted more than one.) In his mind, they all had Logan's looks, in one way or another. He prayed that none of them would be "blessed" with his hair. They would all love sports and flying, of course, as well as surfing, just like their parents. None of them, however, looked anything like the tiny Wraith girl they brought back and who was now sleeping in a crib in the infirmary.

Yes, he felt compassion for the little orphan. He agreed with Logan that it wasn't her fault that she'd been born of the Wraith. He'd come to trust that she was far too young to display any of her Wraith tendencies yet, and could even admit that the child was rather sweet, except when she was hungry; and she had a voracious appetite for an infant. Otherwise, she was at least as enchanting as any human baby tended to be. There would come a time, someday, when her Wraith lineage would take over and she would become just like the others of her race; feeding on humans.

"Admit it, you think she's kinda cute," Logan demanded.

"Sure she is... She's helpless right now. Just give her a few years..." he trailed off meaningfully.

Logan thwacked him playfully. "You're not nearly as gruff as you like people to believe!"

A sudden knock at the door prevented him from doing what he wanted to do; which was pick her up, throw her down on the bed and have his wicked way with her. Logan smiled, recognizing the gleam in his eye. "Later," she whispered as she went to answer the door.

"Oh good, you're both here!" Beckett said as he and Fraser walked in.

"What did you find?" she asked.

"Carson was right... All the tests confirmed it..." Fraser replied.

"So what can we do about it?" Sheppard asked.

"We're not entirely sure... But it does give us some interesting possibilities."

"We can't even be sure that this isn't how all of them start out, initially, but I'm thinking not... The others we've tested have all had very little human DNA in them. While that could be from age..." he shook his head. "No, I definitely think this wee one is different. She has so MUCH human DNA in her... too much, I think for the Wraith DNA to overcome."

"So you still think they were experimenting on human women?" Sheppard asked, clearly sickened at the thought.

"Much as I hate to think about that... Yes, I do." Beckett admitted.

LATER

"That much?" Weir asked.

"That much," Beckett replied.

"Why would they do that?" Caldwell asked.

"It may have been unintentional on their part, or it could be what they were going for all along. We can never know for sure, since there's no one left to question."

"They hardly gave us a choice, Carson," Logan said defensively.

"I know that Luv, I'm not criticizing. I just hope we can find something they might have left behind that might give us some answers. Any information on their experiments, what they were trying to accomplish... Anything."

"And, as of right now, you have no way of knowing for sure whether or not her DNA will... mutate... whether the Wraith part will take over?" Caldwell asked.

"No way of knowing for sure, no... But if I were a betting man, I'd say it's not likely. The child is about 90% human, after all... The odds that only 10% of her DNA can overcome that...?" he shrugged and shook his head.

"Well, has there been any sign that the Wraith have tried to get back into the new city?" Weir asked, glancing at Logan.

"None so far. The shields are now up and running, Carter and McKay are going through the Ancient database there, and we haven't found anything left behind by the Wraith, except for the baby and her incubator; which is still there by the way."

"Maybe there's something in that incubator..." Caldwell ventured.

"I'll have McKay check it out," Logan said.

"What do we do about the baby? I understand we're having a problem finding a permanent nanny?" Weir asked.

"My nursing staff is far too busy to care for her full-time, they've been taking turns, and everyone else works... I thought maybe someone from the mainland, but..."

"They're afraid of her," Logan finished for him.

"I'm afraid so," Beckett confirmed. "Dr. Fraser wanted to take her, but she's as busy as the rest of us," he added.

"Maybe we need to have someone sent from Earth?" Weir ventured.

"That might not be a bad idea. Someone with the proper training, and who won't want to cut her open and see what she's made of," Beckett interjected.

"We really should name her, you know," Logan groused.

"Teyla had a thought about that," Beckett said.

"What is it?" Weir asked.

"Hope."

"It's certainly fitting," Weir said.

"I like it... I mean, that IS what she represents, in one form or another, right?" Logan pointed out.

"Fine with me," Caldwell said.

"Hope it is, then," Beckett grinned.

"Who's with her now?" Logan asked.

"Teyla. She's been spending a lot of time with her," Beckett replied.

As soon as the meeting broke up, Logan first went to the control room to contact McKay. Once she'd communicated what she wanted him to look for, and where, she went to the infirmary to check on Hope. She stood in the doorway, watching Teyla with the baby. She was a natural, Logan thought. The fierce warrior had developed quite a soft spot for little Hope, and the infant seemed to return her affection. Teyla suddenly turned in her direction, sensing someone's eyes upon her, and smiled warmly.

"Hi Teyla," Logan greeted her.

"Hello Logan," she replied.

"I understand this little one has you to thank for her new name?"

"It seemed to fit," Teyla shrugged.

"It does at that. How's she doing?"

"She is doing very well. She certainly has a healthy appetite," Teyla chuckled. "She usually downs two bottles before she begins to feel satisfied."

"That's amazing," Logan agreed.

"Would you care to hold her?"

"Sure, thank you."

Teyla stood up and reliquished the rocker to Logan, gently placing the baby in her arms once she sat down. Logan kept rocking as they talked for a while before Teyla excused herself to take a break. She softly sang a little to Hope, who genuinely appeared to enjoy it. Her eyes always seemed to focus in on Logan's, as though she could understand her words and thoughts. There was something in Hope's eyes that screamed "old soul" to Logan. There was a wisdom behind those eyes that couldn't possibly be there, at least not yet. She started as Teal'c came in behind her and cleared his throat.

"I believe it is my turn, Logan Devane," he said with a smile.

Logan graciously relinquished Hope into Teal'c's arms. It was both touching and amusing to see the giant Jaffa cuddling the tiny infant girl. He seemed as smitten with Hope as Teyla was. Probably a good thing, she thought, given that Teyla had taken to spending almost every free moment with her. Logan chatted with Teal'c for a while longer, then excused herself to go and check on McKay's progress in the new city.

When she arrived, she found McKay and Carter enjoying a private joke together. Carter looked somewhat guilty and even blushed a little when she saw Logan come in, as though Logan had caught them in the middle of something very private. She had to stifle a grin, since it seemed like Carter was the only one who believed that her burgeoning romance with McKay was in any way a secret to the rest of them.

"How's it going kids?" she chirped in very O'Neill-like fashion.

"Great!" answered McKay.

"What have you found?"

"More of the usual. But... I did find something in that Wraith incubator thing..." holding up a Wraith data device.

"Fabulous!"

"We're still working on deciphering everything, but there's a lot of information on the data device regarding the experiment this particular group was conducting... on Wraith-Human reproduction," Carter informed her.

"That's what we were hoping to find. What have you learned so far?"

"Not a lot... Apparently this group was trying to incorporate more human traits into the Wraith line... Not sure WHY that is, but they used as many as ten human women, so far, to experiment on, trying to bring about a more Human-looking, or acting, Wraith species."

"I'm not sure if that would be good or bad," Logan admitted.

"It could go either way," Carter said. "If they wanted to do this to more easily infiltrate human wolds without detection that would be bad... If they were actually doing it to change their ways, their feeding habits..."

"One could only hope!" Logan interjected.

"Right... We'll know more as we get through deciphering the rest of the data."

"I can't wait," she snarked. "I'm going to go take a look around while you two get back to work."

"See you later!" McKay waved.

With the city fully secured, and the shields fully operational, there was little for Logan to do, security-wise. She took advantage of the free time to fully look at each room. She was in the middle of reading through some info she found in one of the labs when Mitchell walked into the room, startling her. They hadn't really had a chance to talk, on a personal level, since she'd gotten her memory back. Her face flushed at Mitchell's expression of yearning. Even though she hadn't known at the time, she felt so guilty for leading him on the way she had, before Sheppard told her the truth about them.

"Logan," he grinned tentatively.

He'd known something had changed between them, though they hadn't had a chance to talk yet, even before she'd gotten her memory back.

"Hi Cam," she smiled warmly.

"I...uh... I heard you got your memory back," he eyed her curiously.

"I did."

"You must be relieved."

"I am," she smiled happily.

"So... now you remember why we... you... why you only wanted to be friends," he stammered.

Her face flushed again as she thought back to the kiss they'd shared. "It isn't as cut and dried as that, Cam."

"No?"

"No."

Mitchell stepped forward and stood before her. "Tell me then... Please, Logan... I'm usually pretty good at recognizing when someone returns my affection and I... Was I wrong?"

Logan shook her head negatively. "No, you weren't _wrong_... Not really."

"What does that mean?" he prodded.

"I... Cam... Damn... You are unbelievably attractive..." he smiled broadly at that. "I... You know why I... the first time... why I was uncomfortable with the... you know... getting romantically involved with you. It had nothing to do with YOU as a person, right?"

"I remember," he nodded.

"The whole 'It's not you, it's me' thing seems a bit convenient, but it really is true. I wasn't in a place where *I* felt comfortable being in a relationship with anybody, much less someone who could hurt me as much as you could..."

"You were afraid I would hurt you? Logan, I would never..."

She held up a hand to stop him. "I know you wouldn't intentionally hurt me, Cam. I just... I was still dealing with some residual Daniel-stuff, and then there was that whole being-held-hostage-for-a-year-stuff I was trying to put behind me... I needed time to just be... ME... I guess. I couldn't handle being part of an 'US' at that time..."

"I see."

"I'm not trying to make excuses, feeble as my reasoning might sound," she assured him.

"I don't think your reasons are feeble. At least you're being honest, that's all I ask."

"Always," she assured him.

"So... You WERE attracted to me?" he flashed her a wicked grin.

"Of course, I'm only human."

"Careful," he grinned. "I may try to put some moves on you for that!" he teased.

"I stand warned, Colonel."

"And now... You were attracted to me... that day...?"

Logan blushed. "I.. Yes," she admitted.

"Buuuuut...?" he prodded.

"I..." she turned away and took a deep breath.

"There's someone else now, isn't there?"

Logan whipped around to look up into his eyes. "Yes... I'm sorry, Cam... How did you know?"

"I wasn't absolutely sure, but there's something in your eyes... Regret maybe? Over letting me kiss you?"

"Guilt, regret, embarrassment... Take your pick!" she chuckled nervously.

"That bad, eh?" he teased.

"I would never want to hurt you for anything, I swear to you... I never meant to lead you on."

"Hey," he reached out and took her hands in his. "I know that, Logan. You don't have it in you."

"I'm so sorry," she said, her eyes brimming with tears.

"We all take risks, Lo. I took a chance that all your reasons for not wanting to be with me before didn't matter anymore. I wanted you enough to take that chance... I knew it might not happen, but it was worth the risk."

"You're sure about that now?"

"As sure as when I decided to pursue you again, and I'm not sorry I did... Except for the obvious pain it caused you..."

"It's not like that..."

"Just tell me this: If it weren't for this other guy, would we have had a chance?"

"Are you sure you want me to answer that?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

He smiled and physically braced himself. "Yes."

She looked him right in the eye, squeezing his hands as she replied: "You bet your ass we could have had a chance."

He smiled broadly at that. "Well then... any chance you might be dumping this other guy in the near future?"

She continued to look him in the eye. "No, Cam... I'm sorry, but I don't see that ever happening."

"It's that serious?" he gaped at her.

"It is."

"Wow," he shook his head but didn't walk away. "Should I be pricing wedding gifts?" he joked.

"For an old military broad like me? Nah!"

"Well... He better keep treating you like a queen..."

"Cam... No one else knows about this. We'd like to keep things... private."

"I wasn't going to ask..."

"I know. But others would, if they knew I was seeing someone."

"Well, they won't hear it from me. I just... I want you to be happy."

"I am... And I want YOU to be happy, too."

Mitchell nodded. "Thanks. I will be."


	39. Chapter 39

The wedding of Teal'c and Teyla took place four months later. There had been little doubt, in anyone's mind that the two would one day marry, it was rather a question of WHEN. Halling had agreed to act as Father of the Bride, while Sheppard acted as Man of Honor, and O'Neill as Best Man for Teal'c. Logan and Carter served as bridesmaids, and Daniel and Mitchell as groomsmen. Of course none of these Earth terms were used, but the general functions remained the same.

As the apparently adopted daughter of Teyla and Teal'c, Hope was also in attendance. Everyone on Atlantis had long given up on the notion that tiny Hope posed a threat to them, as the only Wraith tendency she seemed to exhibit was her voracious appetite. Not for humans, but for her formula and baby cereal. Other than that, she behaved as any other normal human baby.

Teal'c would still be serving as part of SG-1, and Teyla would remain a member of Sheppard's team. The only difference would be that they would be sharing a family quarters in Atlantis, rather than having separate quarters in both cities. The wedding went off without a hitch. The ceremony itself had been beautiful and moving. Several times Logan and Sheppard would look at one another, in silent remembrance of their own ceremony. She would have loved to shed all pretense and spend the day arm in arm with her own husband, but they managed to find time, several times, to steal away briefly and spend a few quiet moments together.

They would all be repeating the festivities two months later when Daniel and Kitah had their wedding. It seemed there was an epidemic of wedding fever, as several couples also announced their engagements or betrothals during the festivities. While Logan and Sheppard were happy for the other couples, it was still hard for them to have to hide their own relationship from their friends and co-workers. They both held onto the hope that somehow the rules would someday (hopefully soon) change and they would be permitted to share their own news with the others.

"I was wondering when you were going to make it official," Logan smiled as she approached Caldwell.

"Oh?" Caldwell replied.

"Well, Steve... It's not like it was a secret... Not to me, anyway," she smiled warmly.

"You know me too well," he shrugged.

"Is that a bad thing?" she teased.

"If it were anyone else but you, it would be."

"Things have gotten pretty relaxed around here, haven't they?" she sighed.

Caldwell shrugged again. "One of the hazards of working together for so long, in relative isolation. We're pretty removed from standard military decorum out here."

"Does that bother you?" she asked.

"It used to. I used to be afraid that people would get so lax about regs that they'd forget about chain of command, following orders, etc. "

"And now?"

"Not so worried anymore," he smiled. "We've got good people here. Even the new ones rotating in; they kind of keep the old timers on their toes about stuff like that."

"So... When is the wedding?" she asked.

"Next month. We'd really like to keep it small and dignified."

Logan laughed. "So _not_ like Teal'c and Teyla's?"

Caldwell laughed too. "No! Definitely NOT like that!"

"I'm happy for you, Steve. Really."

Caldwell reached out and took her in his arms. "Thanks Lo... I never imagined..." he trailed off.

"She'd want you to be happy, Steve. And she'd want Sammy to have a mother."

He nodded gravely. "I know. And Sam loves Lyta."

"So everything is working out perfectly!" she beamed.

Caldwell pulled back to look at her. "Logan... Haven't you ever..." he trailed off again.

"What?" she had a feeling she knew what he was going to say and braced herself.

"In the time I've known you, I have been married and widowed twice, now engaged for a third time... In all that time, you have had exactly ONE serious relationship. We've talked about this before, but... Don't YOU want a family too?"

Logan felt that queasy heaviness in the pit of her stomach. She hated keeping the truth from people she cared about, especially Steven Caldwell, but she could not put him in the awkward position of choosing between regs and his friendship with her.

"You know I do, Steve... But I have time..."

"You certainly aren't planning on going back to Earth any time soon so, unless you're planning on getting involved with one of the scientists, or engineers or contractors here... Logan when are you going to ever FIND someone to share your life with?"

He saw a flash of guilt in her eyes before she could cover it. "Unless... Hey, are you and Mitchell... I know he's always had eyes for you, but..."

"No!" she said a little too quickly.

"No, he hasn't had eyes for you?"

"No... I mean, he has... I just... It never would have worked," she stammered nervously.

"You ARE the same rank... While he's technically under the same command as you, he is assigned to a different city so..."

"Yenta!" she teased.

Caldwell laughed. "Okay, okay..."

"Don't worry about me, Steve, I am FINE... And I have time for worrying about kids and family later."

"Alright, Lo. I just want you to be happy."

"I _am_ happy. As long as I can stay here, I'm happy!"

MONTHS LATER

The following months brought about many more changes in the new Earth colonies within Pegasus. Caldwell and Lyta were married, as were Daniel and Kitah. Both Lyta and Kitah were pregnant and she had never seen either Caldwell or Daniel quite as happy as they were now. Kitah had moved to Genoa with Daniel but they were frequent visitors to Atlantis, as Kitah still had very strong ties to the Athosians on the mainland; at least those who had chosen to remain on Lantea, rather than relocate to the various worlds now colonized by Earth.

Human life was beginning to flourish again in Pegasus; thanks to the combined efforts of the humans from Earth and the Asgard. The Wraith were nowhere near defeated, yet, but they had significantly reduced their number and put things in Pegasus on a more even keel. Establishing old outposts, originally built by the Ancients and keeping them secret and shielded, they were able to provide safe havens for the humans of other worlds. They were also able to shield and protect the home worlds of their allies within Pegasus.

Surprisingly enough, the Genii remained staunchly opposed to any alliance between themselves and the Lanteans. Their capacity for holding a grudge seemed limitless. It also seemed, at times, as though they hated the Earthlings more than they hated the Wraith, inexplicable as that might be. Weir had theorized that the Genii saw the Earthlings as a bigger threat to the empire they wanted to build. They were systematically engaging and beating the Wraith all over the galaxy, and if they could do that, they would have no problem overpowering and defeating the Genii. Twisted logic, to be sure, but they wanted to build their OWN empire, not be part of one that the Earthlings were building.

What they failed to understand though, what they ALWAYS failed to understand, was that the Earthlings did not want to CONTROL any empire. They wanted to free the humans of this galaxy from thousands of years of oppression and cullings by the Wraith, so that ALL the humans of the galaxy could live without fear. So these worlds could grow and prosper as they should have from the beginning. The Earthlings offered hope. They offered protection. They offered freedom. All the Genii wanted was to do was offer a different form of slavery to the humans of Pegasus. They wanted to make all humans answer to THEM, rather than to the Wraith, or the Earthlings. That would always keep the Genii and Earthlings on opposite sides of the fence. A situation that frequently reared up during missions throughout the galaxy.

"Anything?" Mitchell's voice came over the radio.

Logan keyed her mic, "No... It looks like the Wraith may have gotten this one," she responded.

She shook her head and pulled out her canteen. Rather than drinking the water, she poured it over her head. For some reason the heat was really getting to her today and it was beginning to get on her nerves.

"What say we call it a day then?"

Logan smiled for the first time that day. "You're my hero, Colonel!" she chirped happily.

"I aim to please, Colonel!" came Mitchell's sunny reply.

The three teams began breaking camp and packing up their equipment. For three days they'd been searching for yet another Ancient city. Searching in vain, it seemed. Logan couldn't wait to get back home. Back to Sheppard. Back to the cool ocean breezes. Back to Sheppard. The thought of her husband brought a wide grin to her face and made her pack more quickly. Just as they were all ready to move out, a proximity alarm went off on the far side of their camp. The scientists were quickly herded into a tight circle, surrounded by the soldiers in a protective circle as the threat was assessed. Nothing moved outside the perimeter of the camp, but Logan could now *feel* something off. They were not alone as they'd believed, after all.

"Wraith?" Mitchell whispered.

"I don't think so..." she replied.

Looking around for any sign of movement an odd, eery feeling of deja-vous was creeping over her.

"What is it, Logan?" Mitchell asked.

"I'm not sure...This has the same feeling to me as..."

"GENII!" Daniel called out from across the circle to them.

A moment later, there were explosions going off all around them.

"Dammit!" Logan and Mitchell yelled in unison. "Get to the gate!" Mitchell ordered.

Logan, Bates, Lorne, Mitchell, Teal'c, Carter and Daniel took up positions at the rear of their fleeing charges. They could now see the unmistakeable uniforms of Genii soldiers advancing on their position through the smoke.

"Double-time!" Carter ordered.

As the explosions continued around them, the Lantean teams drew closer and closer to the gate. From where they were positioned, they could see that the Genii weren't really trying to kill them, or rather they weren't trying to kill the scientists.

Logan and Mitchell's eyes met, instantly drawing the same conclusion.

"Where the hell did they get explosives like that?" Carter shouted.

Logan shrugged and shook her head.

Once within sight of the gate, the Genii stepped up their assault, trying desperately to keep them from escaping. They hadn't thought out their ambush very well, since they failed to have a contingent at the gate to cut off their escape. Then again, in typically overconfident Genii manner, they probably didn't think the Lanteans would be able to escape their ambush in the first place.

Logan ordered everyone to keep running for the gate while one of them dialed the gate. Daniel dialed home and Logan sent her IDC code as soon as the wormhole established. "Atlantis, this is Devane. We're coming in hot!"

Caldwell's voice came back strong and reassuring as always. "What's your situation, Colonel?"

"The Genii are firing, sir, we're ducking!" she hollered, motioning for the scientists to head through the event horizon.

Several blasts went off in close proximity to where she and Daniel were standing, and she ordered Daniel to run for the gate with Lorne and Bates while she waited for Carter, Teal'c and Mitchell. Another blast sent Bates to the ground, with Lorne landing on top of him. Teal'c charged up to them and lifted both men off the ground. Lorne started running, but Bates was unconscious, so Teal'c slung him over his shoulder and carried him to the gate. Carter was close behind Teal'c and turned to look back over her shoulder for Mitchell and Logan.

They were sprinting toward the gate, about fifteen feet behind, and motioned her to go on through. Another explosion shook the ground and knocked them off their feet, but they quickly regained their footing and continued running. Just as they reached the gate, another explosion went off, almost right on top of the gate as they stepped through the event horizon.

Caldwell and the others watched in horror as the gate flared once and then shut down.

"NO!" cried Carter, McKay, Daniel and Teal'c simultaneously.

"What happened?" Caldwell demanded.

McKay was already checking readings in the control room.

"McKay?" Caldwell barked.

"I don't know... Something caused a surge in the gate and..."

"And?"

"They didn't make it through."

"What do you mean they didn't make it through? Where ARE they?!" Caldwell barked.

Carter ran to join McKay in the control room and help check all the data. Even together they couldn't find any trace of their patterns within the gate itself.

"Are they still on the planet?" Caldwell asked.

"The Genii would have them... if they are..." Carter muttered grimly.

"Then we have to go back," Daniel said.

"And we will..."

"Wait a minute!" McKay called out.

"What is it?" Carter asked.

"I don't think they're on that planet anymore..."

"What do you mean?" Caldwell asked.

"Sam, this is... I'm pretty sure... A similar thing happened to you and General O'Neill a while back..."

"You don't mean..." she froze for a moment. "You think the wormhole jumped?"

"Jumped?" Caldwell stared between them in confusion.

"General O'Neill and I were thrown to a different gate when the one we were using received a similar jolt, a sudden power surge... It shifted the wormhole, made it jump..."

"But there's no other gate on Lantea," Daniel pointed out.

"I think the only reason we were sent there is because it was so close... Otherwise, there's no telling WHERE we might have ended up."

"Then _how_ do we find them?" Caldwell demanded.

"I'm not sure..."

"Find who?"

Everyone froze and then turned to face Sheppard, who'd just come in from the mainland. Sheppard looked quizzically around the gateroom, then froze as well, when he didn't see Logan.

"What the hell's going on?" he demanded.

Caldwell pulled him aside, away from the others. "The expedition was ambushed by the Genii. Everyone made it back safely, except Colonel's Mitchell and Devane..."

"The Genii have them?" his stomach heaved at the thought.

"We don't believe so."

"What do you mean?"

"There was an energy fluctuation... a power surge right before they entered the event horizon... Dr. McKay and Colonel Carter think they were sent to another planet..."

"What planet?"

"We don't know, John."

"Colonel..."

"I know, John, I KNOW... And we're not giving up until we find them."

SEVERAL MONTHS LATER

Sheppard thought he was losing his mind. In the three and a half months since Logan and Mitchell vanished, there had been no sign of them. No trace. McKay had explained that they could be ANYWHERE in the galaxy and only a planet by planet search could rule out where they WEREN'T. What McKay couldn't promise him, however, was that they hadn't been sent to a gate in orbit over one of those planets.

 **No**! He shook his head to rid himself of any negative thought. Logan was alive. He could feel it in every fiber of his being. He could feel her - almost hear her sometimes. She was out there, somewhere, waiting for him. The fact that they hadn't heard from her or Mitchell yet could mean several different things. Maybe they were in hostile territory, where they couldn't access the gate. He was virtually certain the Genii didn't have them. He was virtually certain that _no one_ was holding them. They were just... _lost_. _Unable_ , not _unwilling_ to get back home. He could somehow sense it.

"Colonel?"

Sheppard jumped and turned around to find Janet Fraser standing in the doorway.

"Doc. What can I do for you?" he asked sheepishly.

"Actually I'm just here to see how YOU'RE doing," she told him.

"I'm fine," he said a little too quickly.

"Fine? I know you're not fine, John. You forget, I'm the one person here who knows EXACTLY what you must be going through right now."

Sheppard nodded. "They know... enough... about our relationship to expect that I'd be...upset..."

"But they don't know that she's your WIFE as well as your best friend. I thought you might need someone to talk to... Someone who knows."

"I can't lose her, Doc... Not again. I know she's out there... I can feel her presence. I know she's alive. It's almost... I can almost hear her sometimes. I'm not crazy," he glanced at her and then away again.

"We'll find her then," she assured him. "And no... you're not CRAZY, John. Don't forget, I have a unique understanding of how your abilities work."

"You don't think it's just wishful thinking on my part?" he asked. "And what do you mean abilities?"

"No, I don't believe for a moment that it's wishful thinking on your part. And as far as your abilities? John, you don't think that you having the ancient gene only allows you to just use technology or fly a jumper, do you? There is much more to it than that. I don't think either you or Logan have even begun to scratch the surface of what you're capable of. Or Major Lorne, or Carson, or anyone else who has the gene, for that matter."

Sheppard stared at her in growing horror. "I'm not sure I even want to think about that," he told her.

She shook her head. "Not right now. But at some point, when we have her back, I think it would behoove you - all of you - to begin exploring that side of your heritage. For now, we'll focus on finding her and getting them back, safe and sound. You know in your heart and in your mind that she's alive. Hold onto that, John."

ONE MONTH LATER

Caldwell quietly entered the gym, not wanting to disturb whoever was inside beating the hell out of the heavy bag. As he suspected, it was Sheppard, again. He'd become a regular there, in the late evening or early morning hours, and his sleep deprivation had become a way of life for him. He was still sharp as ever, when on duty, but he was out of it the rest of the time. Caldwell understood, of course, where it was coming from, but he knew that Sheppard wasn't doing himself, or Logan and Mitchell, any favors by letting himself get rundown. He felt a painful tug at his heart at the thought of Logan. He was concerned about Mitchell, as well, but Logan still held a special place in his heart, and he missed her terribly.

They'd been searching for almost five months already and most had already given up hope, or were close to it by now. Those who didn't really know Logan that well - or her reputation. Hammond had not, as yet, directed them to stop the search, but it was only a matter of time before HE would be ordered to give that order. Caldwell knew that Hammond would *look the other way* if, no make that WHEN, they continued to search for their missing people anyway, but no one wanted to put him in that position.

Caldwell, himself, would never give up on her, and he'd reassured Sheppard time and time again that he would never stop until they'd found them. His assurances were doing little to comfort Sheppard, or himself for that matter. Those first miserable days after they'd disappeared had stretched into agonizing weeks and now excruciating months without word of their fate. He believed they were still alive and out there somewhere, but he was in a rapidly dwindling minority.

Sheppard had stopped pummeling the heavy bag long enough to turn and see him standing in the doorway. "Sir."

"Sheppard."

"You need the bag?" Sheppard asked, clearly exhausted.

"Not until you're through."

"I've been here for hours, sir, go ahead," he said.

"Still not sleeping well, I see."

"No sir."

"Sheppard... John, I know this is hard for you, but we'll find them. You know how strong and stubborn they both are. I'm convinced that the only reason they haven't contacted us is because there's something wrong with the DHD on whatever planet they landed on; not because they're physically incapable of contacting us."

"That's what keeps me going sir," Sheppard nodded.

"In the meantime, you have to keep your strength up. You have to take care of yourself, or you're not gonna be much help in finding them."

"I...can't..." Sheppard looked away and took a deep breath in a vain effort to calm himself.

"Night-time is the hardest, I know. That's when all the what-ifs come out to torment you," Caldwell nodded.

"Yeah."

"You told me that you can feel she's alive out there; that legendary connection the two of you share... You still believe that, don't you?"

Sheppard looked him right in the eye. "I do."

"Then she is, and we WILL find them, we'll get her back where she belongs."

"Yes, sir... We HAVE to."

ONE WEEK LATER

McKay had never seen Sheppard in such a state before. Not even when Logan had been supposedly killed in Afghanistan. Yes, he had been devastated, of course, but this was different. Perhaps it was because that time there had been no reason to hope or to wonder whether she was alive or dead. This time... It was the NOT knowing that was eating Sheppard alive. Gone were the jokes and wisecracks. Gone was that trademark half-smile that drove women crazy. Worse still, was the fact that the light in his eyes had gone as well.

McKay had suspected for some time that Sheppard's feelings for Logan had changed over the past few years. He'd always loved her, no question, but now? He was sure it was more. There had been a few times he'd seen Sheppard steal a longing glance at Logan, when he thought no one was watching. He'd kept his mouth shut, for a change, out of respect for the two who'd become so much more than co-workers. They were his friends, and they had each saved his life on more than one occasion. And, dammit, he wanted them to be together - here - in Atlantis. He wanted them to be as happy as he and Carter.

Even the mere thought that it could have been Carter out there, instead of Logan, sent chills down his spine. It wasn't that he'd rather it be Logan instead, he'd rather have them all here and safe. He and Carter had come a long way together, especially after spending all that time together learning the fine art of ZedPM technology on Thor's homeworld. He'd been madly in love with Carter for so long, and now... She loved him back - happily, freely loved him - Rodney McKay. He could be completely, blissfully happy now if only Logan and Mitchell would be returned to them, safe and sound.

That was another thing that had to be eating away at Sheppard. It was no secret that she and Mitchell had once been an item - or close to it. If they were still alive and well - and McKay would not permit himself to believe otherwise - that meant that they were out there - TOGETHER. He was man enough to (grudgingly) admit that Mitchell was a good looking guy. He had a certain charm the ladies seemed to find appealing - at least ones who were into tall, dark, heroic, pilot types. Logan had even found him appealing, once upon a time, it was at least plausible that she might, under the circumstances, find herself drawn to him again.

"You look very melancholy."

McKay turned to find Carter standing in the doorway.

"Just thinking," he sighed.

"About Logan and Cameron?"

"And Sheppard."

She nodded. "I just saw him... He's not doing well."

"I know," he shook his head. "If we don't find them soon, he's going to lose it."

"It's been six months, Rodney, and we haven't found so much as a trace."

"Well maybe we need to expand our search parameters," he snipped.

"Do you honestly believe the wormhole they were traveling through could have jumped farther than we thought?"

"Why not?" he said defensively. "Who says it would HAVE to go to a planet closer to us here?"

"Physics?"

"We've seen the laws of physics defied before. Besides, we still don't know what type of explosives the Genii were using. They might have been more powerful or unstable than we first thought."

"We're still not done searching the first grid we set. There are a lot of planets still out there in that."

"Yes, and Logan and Mitchell are on one of them!"

Carter reached out and took his face in her hands. "Do you really believe that?"

"Don't you, Sam? You went through something like this with O'Neill. Where would you be right now if Hammond, Danaiel and Teal'c had given up on you?"

"I'd be a frozen popsicle in Antarctica."

"Exactly. We can't give up on them, Sam. Sheppard believes she's still alive, that's good enough for me."

"Sheppard is in love with Logan," Carter sighed.

"I know. That doesn't mean he's wrong, or that it's just wishful thinking."

"Wait... You KNOW? Did he admit it?" she gasped in shock.

McKay snorted. "No... I can just...tell."

"Wow... Rodney, your perceptions have certainly come a long way."

"Yeah well... I had a good teacher. Anyway, when Logan gets back, I think she and Sheppard should be together - regulations be damned!"

Carter smiled broadly. "You really ARE getting in touch with your emotions, aren't you?"

"Does that make me weak in your eyes?"

She put her arms around him. "Not in the least."

"Good," he grinned.

"In fact..." she kissed him softly. "It's kind of... hot."


	40. Chapter 40

Sheppard awoke in the middle of the night, perspiration dripping from his body. He'd been having the same nightmare, night after night. Logan was calling to him, begging him to find her but he never could. He could *feel* how much she needed him, not because she was injured or anything, just... that she needed him.

He knew the others were starting to, if they hadn't already, give up hope that Logan and Mitchell would be found. But, he would never give up. Never. He'd done that once already, when she'd supposedly been killed in Afghanistan, but he would never do that again. She was out there, and he would spend the rest of his life looking for her, if he had to. He'd even leave his post, if that was what it came to, so he could continue to search for her.

Janet Fraser had been a Godsend for him the last six months. She was the only one who knew that he and Logan were married. The only one he could completely open up with. She was also a good friend of Logan's and SHE believed as he did, that they would find her, safe and sound, and bring her back home.

Work was also a saving grace. It was the only time he wasn't constantly tortured by missing Logan, though everywhere he went, he always looked for her too. The rest of the time, all he could do was search or dwell on the misery her absence caused. He was also worried about Mitchell, out there lost with her. He knew Mitchell would take care of her, at all costs, but he wondered at the cost to Mitchell. Cameron would never get out of line, he knew that. But he also knew that he was in love with Logan; he'd admitted as much a long time ago. He also knew that she would never feel the same way about him and he accepted it. It had to be excruciating for him to be out there, stranded with her alone, and not be able to DO anything about it.

He'd long gotten over being jealous about the brief time Logan and Cameron had been (very nearly) a couple. It no longer bothered him that another man was in love with her; it wasn't like he could blame him, his wife was the most amazing woman in two galaxies! There had always been and would always be men who would take one look at her and fall instantly in love with her. Logan was his. His wife. His lover. His best friend. She loved him with her entire being and he knew she always would. He had complete confidence in that. That confidence was what allowed him to genuinely feel badly for any man, especially Mitchell, who fell for her.

He lay back on the pillows and tried to go back to sleep, as ordered, but he couldn't shake the feeling that he was missing something. That Logan was calling to him to find her - FAST. It was more pressing than previous times. He sensed no danger surrounding her, just this overwhelming sense of... urgency. After an hour of this he gave up, pulled on some sweats and went out for a run. He needed some fresh air to clear his mind. Caldwell watched him from the control room tower, as he made his way down to the east pier. He'd finally received orders to call off any active search for the two missing Colonel's. Orders, that for the first time in his careeer, he had no intention of following.

Daniel sat in the rocking chair, rocking his fussy son back to sleep. As happy as he was, finally, that happiness was marred by the loss of Logan and Mitchell. The birth of his son was an event he expected to share with both of them, but they'd found no trace of them by the time Kitah delivered. As his son, David, grew and thrived, he'd watched Sheppard wither, little by little.

He, like Sheppard, would never accept that Logan was gone; not until he saw proof. He, like Sheppard, had made that mistake once already and it was something neither of them would do again. He looked over at his wife, sleeping peacefully in their bed, thankful that he hadn't lost her, as he had Sha're and Logan. He'd never imagined that he would ever find the kind of happpiness and sense of completion Kitah had given him.

A noise out in the hall caught his attention. Caldwell, no doubt, walking the halls with his newest child. Lyta had given birth not long after Kitah, to a baby girl both she and Caldwell wanted desperately. Little Riley Caldwell, had been a handful from the get-go. Not in a bad way, but she was definitely not your run-of-the-mill sleepy, quiet newborn. She entered the world ready and raring to go and didn't seem to care much for sleeping. Caldwell would often take to the halls, late at night, so Lyta and the boys wouldn't be disturbed. Only a handful of people knew that they'd given her the name "Riley" in honor of Logan, whose middle name was Riley. Not because they believed her dead, but because the newborn reminded them both so much of Logan.

Daniel stood up, cradling his son against his chest, and went out to join Caldwell in his nightly walk. Caldwell smiled when he saw Daniel emerge from his quarters with David and slowed his pace to allow him to catch up. Riley squealed as she, too, caught sight of Daniel and began kicking her feet until he reached out and caressed the top of her head.

"Nice to know I'm not the only one," Caldwell quipped.

"I have a feeling these two are going to be giving us a LOT of sleepless nights."

"Let's just make sure that's not the case when they're teenagers!" Caldwell warned him good-naturedly.

"How's Sammy doing?" Daniel asked.

"He still asks for Logan all the time... Wants to know when she's coming home."

"Don't we all..."

"Have you seen Sheppard today?" Caldwell cringed.

"Yeah, I saw him earlier. He's...holding up."

"He has to... The alternative is unacceptable," Caldwell grunted.

"Agreed."

The two men continued walking and talking quietly until Riley finally fell asleep on her father's shoulder. Though they were unaware of it at the time, Sheppard had been walking the corridors above them part of that time. Seeing them, holding their babies in their arms, only served to remind him of everything he was missing with Logan. Part of him regretted now that they'd chosen to put off having children. The lonely, desperate part of him that would have loved to have a part of her there with him while she was gone. He realized how selfish that would be, as it would have been doubly hard on a child to be without their mother for so long and quickly shook that thought out of his mind.

He watched Daniel and Caldwell retrace their steps and head back to their respective quarters, then headed for the east pier again. He couldn't bring himself to do the things that normally brought him peace. Not without Logan. He hadn't so much as picked up a surfboard in all the time she'd been gone, nor had he gone for a swim in the ocean. He did like going near the water, though, letting the sea and the air wash over him while he tried desperately to reach out with his mind and *talk* to Logan; to assure her that he would never stop looking.

He sat down on the pier, his long legs dangling over the side and looked out to sea. He let his mind wander back, over all the things they'd done together, both as children and as adults. He thought about everything they still had yet to experience and share and finally, FINALLY let himself go. The tears poured down his face, unabated, as he gave in to his grief and loneliness. He was, by no means, giving up, but he simply couldn't hold back his turbulent emotions any longer.

An hour later Sheppard, still sitting on the pier, was suddenly hit by the oddest sensation. "Logan?" he whispered.

He was sure his mind had to be playing tricks on him because he could swear he heard Logan crying. He had an uneasy feeling that he'd just missed out on something monumentally important. What, he couldn't say, but there was definitely something wrong. She needed him, he could FEEL it. Needed him desperately. If he'd been tortured before, that was nothing compared to what he felt now. His entire being was screaming for him to DO something, but there was nothing else he could do that he wasn't already doing.

"Logan please... Help me out here... Give me a sign... Anything to help me find you..."

TWO WEEKS LATER

Caldwell idly looked at his watch as he stretched. It was almost midnight and he was alone in the control room, with the exception of the two S.O.'s patrolling the tower, and a couple of technicians on night-duty. It was his turn to try connecting to gate addresses they hadn't yet checked.

He'd just sent the MALP through when something on the video monitor caught his eye. It was dark, and things were somewhat distorted by the night vision lens but he thought he caught sight of... something. Moving over to the MALP controls, he instructed the camera to zoom in on something he thought he saw hanging from a tree. He smiled as the camera zoomed in on the familiar SG issue jacket and read the name embroidered over the right breast pocket: MITCHELL.

"Bingo!" he shouted.

One of the tech's turned around quizzically. "Sir?"

Caldwell pushed back from the console and showed him what he was looking at.

"I'll be damned, sir..."

Caldwell hit the broadcast button on the console and began calling out to them through the MALP.

Logan was already awake when she heard the unmistakable sound of the gate activating. She froze for a moment, sure that her mind was playing tricks on her. She'd just been thinking about Sheppard and how desperately she missed him. She counted the symbol locks and then heard the whoosh as the wormhole established.

"Cameron!" she cried.

Mitchell bolted upright at her call. "What is it?" he asked.

"The gate..." she said.

He bounded out of bed, pulling on his pants as he stumbled toward the door. Logan gingerly stood up on quaking legs and walked over to the window, where a pair of mini-binoculars sat on a shelf and picked them up to look out at the stargate. He'd sprinted down the path to the gate and she could tell that he was already talking, but to whom? She watched him until she caught sight of the MALP. Finally. Her entire body was shaking as she turned back and hurriedly began to dress.

"Yes sir, we're both fine, but I have to warn you not to send anyone through... there is no dialing device here, which is why we couldn't get back. There is no power source, so we can't dial the gate manually," he explained.

He was instantly taken back to that fateful day, over six months previously, when the active wormhole jumped and deposited them on this planet.

 _Mitchell carried the unconscious Logan away from the ruins surrounding the gate. It was apparent, from the bleeding goose-egg on her forehead, that she'd hit her head on one of the stone pillars of the ruins when they'd been blasted through the gate._

 _Though he'd had the wind knocked out of him, he'd recovered quickly enough to realize that something had gone horribly wrong. He'd felt the blast as they entered the event horizon, and this place was definitely not Atlantis. After checking on Logan, and assuring himself that she was breathing and relatively okay, he immediately began looking around for the DHD._

 _Unfortunately, he'd been unable to locate one. Anywhere. DHD's were always in close proximity to the gate, but he'd searched the entire perimeter, for fifty yards in every direction and still hadn't found one. Things were not looking good for them, and they'd get even worse if Logan didn't wake up soon. Fortunately, she still had her trusty medical bag with her, so he was able to clean and dress her wound. He then went looking for shelter, since it appeared they would be there for a while._

 _He'd already begun setting up the tent when he heard her start to moan. Extricating himself, he hurried to her side as she struggled to sit up._

 _"Easy, Logan..." he murmured._

 _"Cam? What happened?" she groaned as a wave of dizziness came over her._

 _"Lay down, sweetie, you hit your head."_

 _"Is that why you're shouting at me?" she asked weakly._

 _"I'm not shouting, sweetie, that's your head pounding."_

 _"Oh..." she croaked._

 _"This doesn't look like..."_

 _"We're not in Kansas anymore, Dorothy," he quipped._

 _"Funny...Where ARE we?" she asked._

 _"I'd love to tell you, but... I have no idea."_

 _Logan's eyes popped open. "I'm sorry?"_

 _"Something happened to the gate when we went through...We didn't wind up in Atlantis with the others."_

 _"How long have I been out? Did you call Atlantis and let them know..."_

 _She wasn't so out of it that she didn't notice him cringe when she mentioned calling home._

 _"Cam...What?"_

 _"I don't want you to panic..."_

 _"Panic? Me?"_

 _"Logan, I haven't been able to find a DHD."_

 _"Funny..."_

 _"I'm serious."_

 _"Peachy!" she snorted._

 _He lifted her head gently and pressed his canteen to her lips. She drank quite a bit before her stomach began to protest. Suddenly nauseous, she clamped a hand over her mouth, fearful that she was about to vomit up all the water she'd just drank._

 _"Easy, sweetie, easy...You okay?"_

 _"What did I hit my head on?"_

 _"A stone pillar, in some ruins around the gate."_

 _"Figures..." she looked up at him. "What about you? Are you okay?"_

 _Mitchell smiled brightly. "Let's see. I'm marooned on a deserted planet, with a stunningly beautiful woman... Hmmm..."_

 _She slapped at him weakly._

 _"I'm fine."_

 _"And putting up a tent, I see." she pointed over to the half-erected tent behind him._

 _"Basic necessities first, right?"_

 _"They're going to find us, Cam..."_

 _"I know."_

 _"John will... He'll never stop looking..."_

 _"I know."_

 _"Even if they try to make him stop..."_

 _"Logan, I KNOW. I'd do the same thing. But in the meantime... You're injured, and we need shelter."_

 _"I can help you..." she started to get up, but fell back when the dizziness came again._

 _"You can help me by lying there...But don't fall asleep!"_

 _"I might have a concussion..."_

 _"I'd say that's a virtual certainty."_

 _"Sorry Cam."_

 _"For what? You didn't have anything to do with what happened. You didn't ask to get hurt."_

 _"For not being able to pull my own weight."_

 _"Pull your own... Logan... When you've recovered, I plan on letting you do all the work!" he teased._

 _"What a guy!" she shot back._

 _"Don't worry about it. Just get some rest."_

Caldwell's voice brought him back to the present. "We'll send something through, Colonel... Where's Colonel Devane?"

"She's... back at the shelter, sir, but she's fine too." Sort of. Mitchell turned to make sure Logan hadn't come down to the gate, then back to the camera and assumed a serious expression. "Are you alone, sir?"

"It's just the usual night crew here, why?" Caldwell asked.

"I need to speak to you, sir... Alone."

Caldwell nodded, "I'm coming through, but I'll have McKay and the others working on a way to get us back."

"Thank you, sir. Where's Colonel Sheppard?"

"He's off-world, looking for you two. We'll be sending word to him as soon as I come through."

"Good. And sir? One more thing... Can you send Dr. Beckett or Dr. Fraser through?"

Caldwell gasped, his blood running cold. "Are either of you injured, or sick?"

"No sir, I'll explain when you get here, but I know Logan would feel a lot better if she could see one of them right away."

"I'll take care of it... See you in a few minutes." Caldwell hurriedly issued the orders and then went through the gate.

Mitchell was standing at attention when Caldwell exited the event horizon. He saluted as soon as he saw him and didn't relax until Caldwell stepped forward and, grinning broadly, enveloped the junior officer in a massive bear hug. Mitchell hugged him back, barely managing to keep his composure as the enormity of what was happening finally hit him.

"Colonel Caldwell," he said hoarsely as the gate shut down.

"It's actually 'General' now. How are you, son?" Caldwell studied him intently.

"Good, sir... Better now."

"Where's Logan?" he asked, looking around.

Mitchell pointed north of the ruins. "We built a shelter close by, so we could hear the gate if anyone happened to come through. She's getting a few things together."

"Dr. Beckett will be along shortly... You want to tell me now why she needs a doctor ?"

Mitchell looked away for a moment before replying. "It's nothing pressing, sir, no one is hurt, but..."

"But what, son?"

"I'm not telling you this to rat out a fellow officer, far from it, but the truth will come out, there's no way to avoid it..."

"Then out with it!" Caldwell demanded, dread washing over him.

Mitchell spelled it out for him. All of it. He wasn't betraying Logan's trust. She knew this day would come. And Caldwell having a heads-up would make things a little easier for her. By the time he had spelled it all out, the gate reactivated and the two men stepped aside.

"That'll be Doctor Beckett. If you don't mind greeting him, I'd like to go see Logan now," Caldwell told him.

"Of course. Just head that way (pointing) and you can't miss the shelter we built."

Caldwell excused himself and ran off to find Logan. He couldn't help but be impressed by the "shelter" they'd built. It was clear that the two of them had nothing but time on their hands. The cabin they'd built was exceptionally strong and well-crafted. Before he could knock on the door, Logan opened it and jumped, quite startled to see him.

"Steve...?" she croaked, not quite sure he was real.

"Logan," he murmured.

There wasn't even any pretense at military decorum as she launched herself into his waiting arms. He held her tightly against him, unable and quite unwilling to let her go. Finally, he kissed the top of her head and stepped back to look at her. How was it possible for her to be even more beautiful than he remembered?

"You found us," she croaked.

"We never gave up," he told her.

"Thank you."

"I understand we have a lot to discuss."

"Cameron told you," she nodded. She wasn't angry, but actually relieved.

"He did. He thought it would make it easier for you."

"He's right."

"Are you terribly angry with me?" she winced, but managed to maintain eye contact.

"No."

"Disappointed?"

"No. Logan... no. I suppose I should have known, I probably did, deep down. I mean, I'm not even surprised and I don't think many people will be."

"We never wanted to put you in a position where you had to choose between us and your duty," she told him.

"I understand," he assured her.

"I figured you might, but still... We wanted to tell you, but..."

"We don't have to go into this right now, Logan. Just... let me be happy that you're alive, and that you're coming home."

She stepped into his embrace and buried her face against his chest, letting the tears fall freely. "Where... is he?" she asked timidly.

"He's off-world, looking for you. I left instructions for them to contact him immediately, so he should be charging through the gate any minute now," he chuckled.

"How is he?"

"Miserable," he sighed deeply. "But that'll change the instant he learns that we've found you."

TEN MINUTES LATER

Caldwell was in the other room when Beckett arrived at the door, not even bothering to knock, he burst into the room. Logan turned and smiled at him before being swept off her feet and into his arms.

"Carson!" she cried.

"Good Lord, Logan, it's really you! It's so good to see you, Luv!" he cried.

"You too, Carson. Oh, how I've missed that wicked Scottish charm!"

"So what's wrong then, Luv?" he asked, assuming his more professional demeanor. "Why did you need me to come here? Are you hurt? Are you ill?" he eyed her in concern.

Logan glanced at Mitchell, who'd just come in behind Beckett. "Um...(looking at Mitchell) good call... I'm really glad you're here..." she said, taking Beckett by the arm and leading him to the other room.

Caldwell glanced over at Mitchell. "It must have been hard for the two of you, here alone."

"The hardest part was waiting to be rescued. Once we realized we had no way of using the gate, we knew that the only way we were going home was if someone came to get us," Mitchell told him.

"You've kept busy," he smiled, looking up and around the comfortable cabin.

"We needed shelter," Mitchell shrugged, leading Caldwell back outside where they both headed back to the stargate.

Logan's heart skipped a beat as she heard the gate activate again, knowing it had to be Sheppard. As he burst through the event horizon, he stopped only long enough to assure himself that it really WAS Mitchell standing before him. Without a word, the two men pointed in the direction of the cabin and he sped off to find Logan.

Sheppard crashed through the front door of the cabin like a man possessed. Though she knew he was coming, it still startled her a little when the door crashed back and hit the wall. Twin pairs of emerald eyes met and locked across the room. Neither moved for the space of several heartbeats. Beckett beat a hasty retreat to give them some much needed privacy, feeling an overwhelming sense of deja vu.

"Logan," he croaked as soon as Beckett closed the door.

"John," she murmured before launching herself across the room and into his arms.

Their lips met as she threw her arms around his neck and he lifted her off her feet. He kissed her hungrily as tears streamed down both their faces. Overcome with emotion, Sheppard sank to his knees, drawing Logan down on top of him, straddling his thighs. Suddenly, an angry wail coming from the other room caused them to break apart and look toward the room where the unhappy sound came from.

"What the...?" Sheppard said quizzically.

Logan smiled sheepishly. "There's uh... something we need to talk about..."

"What?" Sheppard blinked down at her.

Logan reluctantly pulled herself away from him and stood up, holding her hand out to him. "Come on... I'll show you."

Sheppard took her hand and followed her into the other room, where a very unhappy baby was busily pitching a fit in a wooden cradle. He looked at Logan and then at the baby, still somewhat confused. Logan gave him an exasperated glance and quickly went to pick up the protesting infant. "I KNOW you aren't about to ask me if she's yours!"

Sheppard stared at the squirming infant in her arms. "She?"

Logan moved forward to where Sheppard stood rooted to the floor. "John, allow me to introduce you to your daughter," she smiled, placing the infant gently in his arms, whereupon she immediately stopped crying. Infant and Sheppard regarded each other with intense scrutiny.

"My daughter... Logan... how?" he gawked at her, seemingly unable to form coherent sentences.

"I think you're perfectly aware HOW!" she chuckled.

"Yeah... I mean... I know HOW... I just... When...?"

"Best guess, about two months, give or take before we got stranded here... Remember that last outing we took at our beach?"

He grinned broadly. "Every minute!"

"Pretty sure THAT was the day..."

"You never said..."

"John, **_I_** didn't know until we'd been stuck here for about a month," she admitted sadly. "I had no idea..."

"I've been looking for you every where," he swore - guilt written all over his face.

"I know."

"I never gave up."

"I know. And I never gave up hope that you would find me (reaching out to stroke the baby's hair) that you would find US."

"I was afraid I'd lose my mind if I didn't find you soon," he murmured sadly, his eyes drawn to his infant daughter's face.

"Same here... But I had to hold it together... for our daughter."

Sheppard smiled warmly down at the tiny infant. "Our daughter... Did you... what did you name her?"

"I chose a name we've discussed before."

He smiled brightly. "Chelsea?"

"For your grandmother."

Sheppard looked down at his daughter. "It fits, don't you think?"

"I do... But I figured with us stuck out here it wasn't something that couldn't be changed, if you didn't like it, when we got back home."

"No... No... I like it," he looked at her somewhat awestruck. "Sparks... We have a daughter..." he said with wonder.

"Yes honey... I know..." she chuckled.

"She has my hair..." he noted with an apologetic glance at both of them.

"Sort of... She doesn't have your cowlicks though. And she looks exactly like you."

"How 'bout that?" he beamed with pride.

"We have a lot to talk about," she said.

"I guess we do..."


	41. Chapter 41

Logan, Sheppard and Chelsea were cuddled up together on the bed when Mitchell ventured into the cabin to retrieve some tools. When he saw them huddled and sleeping, he froze, a pained expression clouding his handsome features. He didn't begrudge Sheppard getting back what was rightfully his, not at all. But it WAS hard for him to have to let go of *his* family. He and Logan had, out of necessity, built a cozy life together, made complete by the arrival of little Chelsea. He had cared for them for so long, waiting to be rescued, that he still felt responsible for them. Of course, when you added the fact that he was in love with Logan to all of that...

Mitchell shook his head and began quietly backing out the way he'd come when Logan, sensing his presence woke up and looked at him. He hadn't been able to hide the pain in his eyes from her quickly enough. She knew how he felt about her and it broke her heart. He deserved so much better than to be in love with a woman who could never return that love in kind. Logan did hold a deep affection for Mitchell, especially after everything they had gone through and shared and, truth be told, under other circumstances, their relationship would probably be very different. As it was, though, Logan could imagine sharing her life with no man other than Sheppard. As close as she and Mitchell had become, and that was VERY close, her body's intense physical reaction to seeing Sheppard again spoke volumes about the connection they shared and the depth of her feelings for him.

Gingerly she extricated herself from Sheppard's embrace, making sure that Chelsea was still secure where she slept on Sheppard's chest, and she tiptoed over to Mitchell. Taking him by the arm, she led him out of the room and closed the door.

"Cam..."

"How's he doing?" he interrupted.

"I... he's... okay. Stunned, but happy."

"He must have been pretty torn up about missing out on... everything."

"Yes, he is... But he's thrilled about the baby."

"As he should be! He's the luckiest man in the world... to have the two of you..."

"Cameron...I...(throwing her arms around him)... Thank you."

Mitchell stiffened momentarily, then wrapped his arms around her. "For what?"

"For taking care of us... First me, then Chels... You've always been so good to us."

"You don't have to thank me for that."

"Yes... I do. We needed you, more than I would ever admit, even to myself. You never let us down."

"You say that as if it were a conscious decision on my part, when it was as natural to me as breathing. You know how I feel about you... About Chelsea... I love that little girl as if she were my own," he murmured.

"I know you do. And we're both so lucky to have you in our lives."

"I'm the lucky one, Lo."

"It's going to be a bit of an adjustment... going back," she sighed.

"Yeah... I figure the sooner we get back to work, the easier it'll be."

"Well, for you anyway..." she winced.

"I thought you wanted to keep working?" he eyed her curiously.

"I do," she sighed. "But I've got a review board to face, at the very least, and possible..."

"They won't kick you out of the military..." he assured her.

"No? Maybe not, but I could be re-assed as soon as we get back..." she cringed.

"I can't see Hammond doing that, or O'Neill... Or Caldwell even. Atlantis is your home now."

"I hope you're right."

"I can't imagine Pegasus without you," he frowned at the mere thought.

"Thanks...again," she smiled, hugging him fiercely.

She heard the distinctive sound of someone clearing their throat and turned to find Sheppard, Chelsea cradled in his arms, standing in the doorway watching them.

"Hey flyboy," she grinned.

"Sheppard," Mitchell grimaced.

"Mitchell," he grunted in response.

"I just came to get some tools... I'll leave you two alone now."

Mitchell grabbed the wooden toolbox he'd built and hurried out the front door. Sheppard watched him go with an almost murderous expression on his face.

"Whoa flyboy... No you don't!"

"What?" he growled.

"You are not going to turn this into a turf war."

"I'm not."

"Don't even try it, John Sheppard! You think I don't know what's going on in that gorgeous head of yours?"

She stepped forward and took the baby from him, then went in and put her back in her cradle before returning to face him. Taking his face in her hands, she made him look squarely into her eyes while she spoke. "I know how much it tears you up that you weren't here with us and he was. But John, he's your friend - OUR friend. None of this was his fault, and I won't let you take out your anger at the situation on him. Not when he's been so good to us."

"I'll bet!" he snapped.

"No! Don't!" she warned. "John, he took care of us. First me, and then Chelsea, after she was born. He saved my life!"

"What?" he became sudenly alarmed.

"These people, in the village here, have some very old-fashioned beliefs - of BIBLICAL proportions. If Cameron hadn't stepped in, posing as my husband, those villagers would have STONED me for sharing a dwelling with a man out of wedlock - never MIND being pregnant."

"He couldn't pose as your BROTHER?" he growled.

"That isn't permitted either. The point is: You owe him your THANKS for looking after your family, not your contempt or anger. John... Cameron never once got out of line. Never. He did what any good, true friend would do and took care of us until you could come and find us. Please... Don't let your anger at the injustice of the situation get in the way of your friendship. He didn't do anything wrong."

Sheppard deflated somewhat. "It isn't that I'm not grateful to him... I AM, it's just..."

"I know, baby, and I know how hard this is for you, but you can't blame HIM for it."

"I suppose not."

"He never forgot that we were married, or that you were his friend. Thank him, John, don't punish him."

"Alright..." he agreed.

"I love you," she murmured, kissing him lightly on the mouth.

Sheppard deepened the kiss, taking her breath away. "I love you, too, Sparks."

When the gate activated again, Sheppard and Logan exchanged knowing glances. That would have to be McKay, with a way to power the gate from this side and bring them all home. He knew he should take the time to pull Mitchell aside, to thank him for looking after his family, but he couldn't bring himself to leave Logan's side, or to put down his beautiful baby girl.

He'd been staring at her, memorizing every little detail, that is, when he wasn't drinking in the sight of his wife. The more they talked, as they waited, the more they realized that they HAD connected, somehow, numerous times during their separation. When Sheppard had gotten that odd feeling that he'd missed something important; that had been the night Chelsea was born. They had a connection that could never be broken. Not by time or distance. Their bond was eternal.

A few minutes later, they heard McKay approaching the cabin and Logan went to the door to greet him.

"Rodney!" she cried.

"Logan! Thank God!" he took her in his arms and hugged her tightly.

"It's good to see you."

"And you! And...(looking over at Sheppard) who do we have here?"

"It's me, Rodney." Sheppard teased.

"Yes, yes, I mean the good looking one!"

"Ahhhh..." Sheppard grinned proudly. "This (holding up the baby) would be my... um... OUR... breathtakingly beautiful daughter, Chelsea."

McKay approached them gingerly. "Oh... wow... She is quite beautiful, (looking at Sheppard) even if she looks like you!"

Sheppard beamed. "How 'bout that, huh? Chelsea, this is your Uncle Rodney, can you say 'hello, Uncle Rodney'?"

Chelsea burped.

"Close enough," Sheppard laughed. "Would you like to hold her?"

"Me?" he looked slightly terrified. "Oh, no no no... I don't... well... I..."

"She's not going to break, Rodney," Logan chuckled.

"Are you sure about that?" he asked dubiously.

"Quite," she assured him.

Sheppard gingerly placed his daughter in McKay's arms and stepped back a pace, wrapping his arm around Logan's waist. McKay soon relaxed and began smiling down at the little infant who was studying him so intently.

"She's very inquisitive, isn't she?"

"Very," Logan replied.

"That's a sign of intelligence."

"She gets that from me," Logan and Sheppard said in unison.

"Well... It's nice to see that SOME things never change," he shook his head at the two of them.

"She really is something, you guys," McKay smiled.

"Thanks," they replied together.

His face became serious and he looked over at Logan apologetically. "Logan, I'm really sorry we couldn't find you sooner."

"Rodney, that's not your fault. It's not anyone's fault..."

"Except the Genii!" Sheppard and McKay sneered together.

"Right," she said.

"You're here now... We knew you'd find us eventually... And now we get to go home... Right?"

"Right!" McKay snapped back to scientist mode. "I left the guys back at the gate to set up while I came to see for myself that you were okay. They should be about done by now, so I should get back."

"Would you send Mitchell back up here please?" Sheppard asked.

"Uh...sure..." he agreed nervously.

"I promise not to pummel him, if that's what you're worried about!" Sheppard growled.

"Oh... Okay then..."

They watched McKay go back down the path to the ruins. Logan really had missed him, obnoxious as he could be sometimes. McKay had a heart of gold, one he rarely let anyone see. A moment later, they heard the gate activate again.

"They couldn't have gotten it going already..." Sheppard murmured.

They looked down the path and saw Mitchell approaching. "John, why don't the two of you take a little walk?"

Sheppard looked at her hesitantly. Now that he had her back, he never wanted to let her out of his sight.

"We'll be fine. And we'll be right here when you get back," she promised.

As Mitchell walked up and greeted them, Chelsea began to fuss. Mitchell's first instinct had been to want to reach out and scoop the tiny girl into his arms, but he didn't do it. Sheppard hadn't missed his daughter's reaction to Mitchell's familiar presence, and his face clouded momentarily, with pain. Logan, too, was at a bit of a loss as to how to handle the awkward moment. She knew that if Mitchell didn't somehow acknowledge Chelsea's play for attention, that she would protest - loudly. But, she didn't want to further alienate Sheppard from his daughter. She did the only thing she could think of doing. Stepping forward, she wrapped one arm around Sheppard's waist, placing herself between he and Mitchell, and Chelsea right in front of Mitchell, where she brushed up against him. He discreetly took hold of one of her tiny hands, giving it a little squeeze before caressing the downy soft hair on her head. That was enough to satisfy her for now.

"Don't go too far," Logan admonished.

"Yes, dear!" Sheppard replied.

Sheppard kissed Chelsea on the top of the head, admonishing her to look after Mommy while he was gone, then lightly brushed Logan's lips with his own. Mitchell stiffened a bit, but kept a smile plastered on his face.

"See ya," he said cheerily as he followed Sheppard's lead away from the cabin.

Logan watched the two of them go. Tall, proud, stubborn as hell. It was immensely humbling to know that both those men would lay down their lives for her and for Chelsea, if the situation warranted that. It brought tears to her eyes knowing that while she loved both of them, albeit in different ways, both men were hurting, each in their own way, because they loved her and the tiny infant in her arms. Sensing her mothers' distress, Chelsea began to fuss again. Logan smiled reassuringly down at her daughter and cooed softly comforting words to her until she calmed. Chelsea latched on to one of her fingers and squeezed it tight, causing Logan to chuckle.

"You have your fathers' grip, little one..."

"Logan."

She froze midway inside the door and turned around.

"Daniel!" she cried.

"It really is you..." he croaked.

"And you," she smiled, tears coming to her eyes.

He covered the distance between them in mere seconds and took both mother and daughter into his arms. "My God..." he croaked, tears streaming down his face.

"I missed you," she said tearfully.

"I missed you too... You know, we really have to stop these long separations!" he snorted.

"Okay by me," she sniffed.

Daniel pulled back a bit to, first, look at her, and then down at the baby. "You gonna introduce us?" he teased.

"Oh!" she chuckled and held up the baby. "This... is Chelsea," she announced proudly.

He smiled, looking Chelsea directly in the eyes, and took one tiny hand in his. "It's nice to meet you, Chelsea. You are VERY beautiful!" he grinned. Looking back up at Logan, he winked, "Even if she looks just like her father!" he teased.

Logan rolled her eyes and shook her head. "No denying that, I suppose."

"I suppose you have to make it legal now, huh?" he asked.

"Legal?" she asked quizzically before it dawned on her what he meant. "Oh! No... Daniel, we've been married for some time now."

"You what?!" he asked incredulously.

She blushed. "We... uh... We got married when we had that six week leave on Earth... A few weeks after Tom's funeral."

"REALLY?!" he grinned. "I knew it!"

"What?"

"Not about that, specifically. I knew Sheppard had deeper feelings for you than he was admitting, I didn't know you returned them, but... Yeah. The two of you together makes sense."

"Well...I'm glad you think so," she chuckled.

"Are you worried about the military?" he asked.

"Shouldn't I be?"

"I don't know, sweetie... I...I can't see them punishing you, at least not severely. The two of you are the same rank, after all - by the way, congratulations on the promotion, and..."

"What?" she interrupted him.

"No one told you?"

She nodded her head negatively.

"Colonel Caldwell is now General Caldwell: you, Sheppard and Mitchell were all promoted to full-bird Colonel's. We received word the day you and Mitchell disappeared, so of course we had no way of telling you two..."

"Wow... Full-bird... Well, that probably won't be for long, at least not for me and John anyway."

"Don't be too sure, Lo. I doubt it'll be as bad as you've been imagining," he smiled.

She shrugged. "I hope you're right. I don't want to leave Pegasus, neither does John but... We'd both resign if they tried to separate us."

"I'm sure... Especially after you being stranded here for so long. Try not to worry, though. Between Hammond, Jack and Caldwell I'd be willing to bet they come up with a way to keep you... BOTH of you...here."

Logan smiled wanly. "I can always hope."

"May I?" he asked, looking down at Chelsea.

"Of course," she grinned, handing the baby over to him. "I hear you have one of your own, a boy?"

"I do... We do... His name is David. He seems to have a mad crush on Riley Caldwell, but I think *this* one could turn his head," he joked.

"Fatherhood suits you, Daniel."

"As does motherhood for you."

"I can't wait to meet young David. Does he favor you?"

"Not as strongly as Chelsea does her father, but yeah... he looks a lot like me."

"Your eyes?"

"Yes."

"Lucky boy. Those baby blues of yours have caused many a heartbreak!"

"Right!" he laughed.

THIRTY YARDS EAST

"I wanted to thank you...for taking care of my family," Sheppard began uneasily.

"Not necessary," Mitchell shrugged.

"Yes...it IS. If you think I don't know how hard that had to be for you, you're wrong."

"Look, John...It's not like it was a conscious choice on my part. We're soldiers, professionals out in the field. It's what we're trained to do; watch each others' six..."

"I know... And I know that was only part of it."

"Beg pardon?" Mitchell eyed him warily.

"I know how you feel about Logan,." Sheppard reminded him.

"I've never lied to you about that."

"I know, and I respect you for it. That's also why I KNOW how hard it had to be for you to be so close..." Sheppard winced.

"Things never got out of line," Mitchell assured him.

"I would have known that even if Logan hadn't told me."

"You and I are friends, John, separate from Logan. I never would have gone there," Mitchell swore.

"I know."

"I'm really happy that you've got your family back."

Sheppard brightened. "So am I."

"Congratulations, by the way. On your marriage AND your daughter." Mitchell smiled warmly, knowing what it had to mean to him.

"Thanks man..." he beamed happily. "I... Cam, I really do appreciate everything you've done for them."

"You'd do the same for me, right?"

"Yes, I would."

"Enough said then," Mitchell nodded.

"Probably not, but I'll let it go... One more thing, though?"

"Yeah?"

"Chelsea... I... It's going to take a little while for her to bond with me..."

"John, I..." Mitchell cringed, knowing what had to be coming.

Sheppard held up a hand to stop him. "No, I... it's okay... I'll be alright... But, Chelsea... her whole world is about to change, enormously, and she'll be in an unfamiliar place, with unfamiliar people. I know she's still so young, but babies can sense these things, right?"

"Well, your daughter sure can, I don't know about other babies," Mitchell beamed, clearly besotted with the young Miss Sheppard.

"I think it would be too hard on her if you suddenly just... vanished... from her life."

"To tell you the truth, it'd be hard on me, too," Mitchell eyed him, somewhat surprised. He'd been expecting for Sheppard to ask for some space, so he could bond with his child.

"So please... Don't be a stranger? Don't feel like you have to stay away."

"I'll do my best," Mitchell smiled, relieved and grateful.

"I know it's a lot to ask..."

"Not really. I'm gonna miss the little pipsqueak!"

"Thanks again, Cam... For everything."

"You're welcome, John."

Sheppard was a little surprised to find Daniel at the cabin when he returned with Mitchell. Though, on second thought, he realized he probably shouldn't be THAT surprised at all, given the history he and Logan shared. Daniel greeted Mitchell with a bear hug and told him he was happy and relieved that they'd both been found safe. The two men excused themselves, to give Sheppard and Logan a little privacy, and headed back to the others who were working on powering up the gate.

Logan smiled up at Sheppard, happy to see that he seemed much calmer after his talk with Mitchell.

"Nice to see that he's still in one piece," she teased.

"Hey, I said I'd behave, didn't I?"

"That you did."

"Now...(taking her in his arms) I would like my wife's undivided attention for a while..."

He dipped his head towards her and captured her mouth in a passionate kiss that left little doubt in her mind just HOW happy he was to have her back in his arms again. Dizzy with emotion, Logan clung to him as his mouth explored hers hungrily. His scent flooded her senses, washing away all care that someone could walk in on them at any moment.

"God, I love you, Sparks!" he moaned into the curve of her neck.

"I love you, too, John..." she gasped breathlessly.

They were interrupted by the insistent wailing of a tiny Sheppard.

"Have I mentioned that she's about as patient as YOU are?" Logan giggled.

"Great!"

He waited a moment after she went to the other room, to catch his breath and allow his heartbeat to return to something resembling normal, then followed Logan into the baby's room. The sight of Logan nursing his daughter took his breath away. They were so beautiful, the two of them, and it humbled him to realize once again that they belonged to him. His family. His hope. His world.

He reached out and caressed the downy hair on Chelsea's head, delighted when she reached out and grasped his finger in one chubby, perfect little hand. His heart was filled with more love than he had ever dreamed possible. Logan smiled up at him, her eyes reflecting the love he felt for them, back at him. He bent down and kissed the top of Chelsea's head and then kissed Logan tenderly on the mouth. A few moments later, they heard a knock at the door. Sheppard went to answer it and found Caldwell waiting there, discreetly.

"Sir?"

"We're ready to try and activate the gate. We're probably only going to have one shot at this, so we'll need everyone standing by and ready to go."

"We're ready, sir," Logan emerged from the other room holding Chelsea in her arms.

Sheppard reached out and took the baby from her while she gathered up a few things she wanted to take with her.

"More than ready," she smiled.

Caldwell led them back down the path toward the gate where the others waited patiently. Both she and Mitchell had a look of anticipation on their faces as the tech's began manually dialing the gate. Anticipation mixed with a touch of dread. They collectively held their breath as the seventh symbol engaged and then locked. Logan felt tears sting her eyes as the vortex whoosed forward and the wormhole stabilized. Sheppard placed one arm around Logan's shoulder, holding Chelsea in his other arm, and led them through the gate.

As she stepped through the event horizon into Atlantis, Logan looked around and blinked the tears away. She was home. But for how long? Weir rushed forward and embraced her, whispering words of welcome and encouragement in her ear. Logan smiled dazedly at her and looked around. She'd been hoping that there wouldn't be a crowd assembled and waiting to welcome them back; that would have been too overwhelming for her.

Sheppard proudly introduced her to their daughter, and Weir cooed and crooned to the tiny girl, marveling at how much she looked like Sheppard. She seemed not in the least surprised, or taken aback by the fact that he and Logan had progressed from friendship to intimacy or that they had produced a child as a result.

Once everyone was back and accounted for, the gate shut down, leaving them all standing around at a loss as to what to do next. Caldwell took the lead and sent everyone off to either work or go back to bed. Mitchell and Daniel were to return to Genoa, where Teal'c, Teyla and Carter were waiting for them. He discreetly ordered Sheppard to take his wife and child back to his quarters and get them settled in for the remainder of the night, so they could get some much needed rest.

Everyone followed his orders dutifully, and with the exception of a few on-duty officers welcoming her back as she passed them in the hall, Logan made it back to Sheppards' quarters relatively unnoticed. She breathed a huge sigh of relief as the door closed behind them and she was free to collapse in Sheppard's arms. She cried profusely for a few minutes, then calmed herself enough to nurse Chelsea while Sheppard made a place for the tiny infant on their bed surrounded by pillows to keep her secure.

After giving the baby over to Sheppard, Logan reacquainted herself with the quarters they'd shared for the most part, since they'd first become lovers. As she stepped into the bathroom, her eyes fixed longingly on the shower enclosure. Sheppard came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her against him.

"You know, the way you're looking at that shower makes me feel oddly... jealous," he teased.

"I haven't had a HOT shower in soooooo long," she murmured longingly.

"Chelsea's fast asleep, so why don't you indulge yourself?" he asked, kissing the top of her head.

"You don't mind?"

"Sweetheart, you can do whatever you want," he assured her.

She squealed, turned in his arms and threw her arms around his neck, kissing him soundly. He was about to suggest that he join her in the shower, but was interrupted by a quiet, yet insistent knock at the door.

As much as she longed to linger in the shower, Logan was extremely tired and, before Sheppard could join her, she had come out and flounced down on the bed, comfortably wrapped in his fluffy robe. Sheppard sat down beside her and turned her so he could towel dry her hair. Logan sat there, dreamily letting Sheppard minister to her, and enjoyed every moment of it. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw something that made her gasp.

"What in the...?"

"Caldwell brought it over," Sheppard explained. "That was him at the door."

"I didn't even think to ask," she murmured moving over to examine what Caldwell had brought them.

"This... This was Sammy's," she sniffled, overcome by emotion and fatigue.

"Yeah. He knew we didn't have one and he thought you might appreciate it."

"How thoughtful," she sniffed back tears.

"I thought so, too."

Logan bent down and kissed her sleeping daughter as she lay comfortably in the cradle. Sheppard must have put her in there as soon as Caldwell brought it in. It was a beautiful cradle, and Logan deeply appreciated the sentiment that had caused Caldwell to bring it to them.

Too exhausted even to put on nightwear, Logan fell back onto the bed and curled up against her husband. She was asleep within moments. Sheppard smiled down at her, kissing her softly on the forehead. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly against him. Tehy could talk in the morning, right now, all he wanted was to hold her close and make her feel safe and loved.

"G'night, sweet-pea," he murmured to his daughter and soon drifted off to sleep as well.


	42. Chapter 42

Sheppard was jolted awake by Logan thrashing around and mumbling in her sleep. She'd called out his name a few times, as if she was searching for him. It hit him hard that she must have spent many nights, like him, calling out for him to find her. While it was somewhat comforting to know that she loved and missed him every bit as much as he had her, it tore him up, knowing how much pain it had caused her to go through everything she'd been through without him by her side.

"John!" she cried and then bolted upright in bed, looking around dazedly. "Cameron?" she called out, still half asleep.

"Cameron's not here, sweetie, but *I* am," he murmured, reaching out his arms to her.

Logan turned and tried to focus on him in the dark. "John?"

"Yeah. It's okay...You're home now," he assured her.

"I thought...(burying her face in her hands)... I thought I was still on that planet..." she cried.

"I know..." he whispered.

Logan buried her face in his chest as they sank back against the pillows. Sheppard held her close, whispering words of comfort and assurance until he felt her body begin to calm. "I missed you so much," she murmured.

"I missed you, too."

"I'm sorry I broke my promise to you," she whimpered.

He stiffened for a moment. "What promise?"

"I told you I wouldn't let anyone take me away from you again..."

"Logan... Honey... You didn't have any control over what happened. No one did, except the Genii. It wasn't your fault, and I don't blame you at all."

"I love you so much, and I knew how it had to be tearing you up that I was gone... again..."

"Not your fault," he repeated.

"When I learned that I was pregnant, I was so happy, but..."

"You knew I'd want to be there to see you through it," he finished for her.

"Yes."

"And that it'd tear me up that I wasn't there for the birth," he added.

"Yes."

"Yeah, Sparks, that's hard but I have you back - BOTH of you - against all odds. There were people who wanted me to give up, who said we'd never find you, but... here you are. And I couldn't be happier about..."

Right on cue, the baby began to fuss and whimper. "Can't say she doesn't have timing," Logan chuckled.

Sheppard hopped out of bed and padded over to the cradle to peer down at his daughter. His smile widened as he picked up the wriggling baby and carried her over to the bed. "What's all the fuss, cadet?" he murmured, softly nuzzling her face.

"Someone's hungry," Logan smiled.

"You have your fathers' appetite," he noted.

"Yes... She does," Logan winced.

Sheppard placed her in Logan's arms and stepped back to watch them both. He had never felt more complete in his life than he did right now. He thought he had, when he and Logan had gotten married, but the addition of their daughter made him see that they'd only been part-way there at the time. Once Chelsea had latched on and settled in, Logan patted the bed next to her. Sheppard eased himself onto the bed, careful so as not to disturb Chelsea, and draped his arm around Logan's shoulder. She sighed contentedly, and rested her head on his shoulder.

"I love you, flyboy."

"I love you, too, Sparky. And in case I haven't said it yet? Thank you (kissing the top of her head) for giving me this beautiful child."

The following morning Sheppard rose early, quietly dressed, and tiptoed out of their quarters, so as not to disturb them. He made his way to the infirmary and approached Dr. Beckett.

"Hello Colonel, how's the family?" he asked cheerily.

Sheppard beamed. "Great! I was wondering, though... I don't suppose you have a supply of bottles and formula anywhere around here?"

"Indeed I do. I had a feeling you might be needing them. AND a supply of disposable nappies. I'm sure Logan will appreciate THOSE after a couple weeks of having to hand wash dirty nappies!"

Sheppard winced, then chuckled. "No doubt! Thanks Doc!"

"And Colonel?"

"Yeah?"

"That's a bonny family you have there, son," Beckett smiled.

He beamed proudly again. "Yes it is, thank you."

"For what it's worth... We won't, none of us here... we won't have them splitting you up again. Whatever it takes, son. You belong here, ALL three of you."

Sheppard was deeply touched. "Thank you, Carson. That means everything to us." He shook Beckett's hand and headed out the door.

Before he could make it back to his quarters, he bumped into Weir in the hall.

"How's the family, Colonel?"

"Good, good... They're settling in."

"I see you had to make a run for supplies," she smiled.

"Yeah...We weren't prepared for...You know..." he stammered uncomfortably.

"Yes...About that, John..."

"Elizabeth look, I'm really sorry we couldn't tell you, that we couldn't tell anybody..."

Weir held up a hand to stop him. "I understand, John, I really do. I wish it could have been different, but it was the way it was. I can't say I'm all that shocked that you and Logan would end up together. As for what we do about it now...?"

"We'll take whatever punishment we have coming, Elizabeth, as long as they don't try to separate us - put us in different places - We'd both resign before we accepted that," Sheppard told her.

"Understood. I want you to know, though, that we are all going to do whatever we can to make sure that doesn't happen. Personally speaking, I think that the separation the two of you endured this past six months or so was MORE than enough punishment for any actual or perceived misdeeds you might have committed."

"I hope they see it that way at the top," he sighed.

"I don't want to lose you, John, or Logan...again. Neither does General Caldwell. We're standing behind you."

Sheppard was touched, again, by the outpouring of support they were receiving from the very people they'd been forced to deceive in order to be together. He was humbled by both their forgiveness and unyielding support.

"Thank you, Elizabeth... I can't tell you how much that means to us."

"You guys are family, John, and family sticks together. Now, with that out of the way, I'm really looking forward to getting to know the newest member of our Atlantis team!"

Sheppard beamed with pride. "She's really something," he grinned.

"She's a dead-ringer for her father, physically... I can't wait to see the other ways in which she resembles you!" she laughed.

"She's certainly got my appetite!" he laughed.

"Speaking of which, you better get those things back to Logan."

"Yes," he grinned, beginning to walk away.

He thought better of it, then turned around and kissed Weir on the forehead. "Thanks Elizabeth, for everything."

"You're welcome, John. Tell Logan I'll stop by when she's feeling up to visitors?"

"Sure thing!" he walked off down the hallway, whistling to himself.

When he arrived back in his quarters, he found Logan sourly muttering to herself as she washed out the diaper she'd just changed for Chelsea. Sheppard victoriously held the disposable diapers aloft and winked at her. Logan looked at the diapers, then up at Sheppard, her eyes full of gratitude, and dumped the dirty diaper down the garbage chute before throwing herself into Sheppard's arms.

"I wish I could take full credit for this," he chuckled. "But it was Beckett who thought of the diapers first. I just went there looking for baby bottles and formula..." He paused at her surprised expression.

"I...um... We haven't really talked about bottles versus nursing, but I'd like to pick up the slack for you once in a while."

Logan smiled up at him gratefully. "No, John... That's great, you wanting to help with feedings."

"And stuff..." he added.

"I'm more than happy to let you change her diapers..." she trailed off with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"I'll bet!" he snorted. "I saw the look on your face when you were washing that thing out..."

"Imagine how bad it was without modern conveniences! Now THAT was fun," she grimaced.

"And it's something you'll never have to do again!" he promised, kissing her soundly.

A sudden squawk from the bedroom caught their attention, and Sheppard smiled down at her and winked.

"I'll get this one," he said.

TWO DAYS LATER

Sheppard opened the door and was practically run over by a dozen or so twittering women. He turned to stare quizzically at the women who he now saw were all carrying bags and boxes festooned with pastel colored ribbons and bows. Weir was holding a giant balloon bouquet, which she presented to a startled Logan.

"What's this?" Sheppard asked.

"This..." Carter began. "Is Logan's baby shower!"

Logan took a step back in amazement. They'd both expected everyone to be furious with them for keeping their relationship a secret for so long. "A shower? For me...?" she gasped.

"Since we couldn't do it BEFORE the baby was born, we're doing it now!" Fraser said.

"I...I...don't know what to say..." Logan stuttered.

"Just sit back and enjoy it, Logan." Teyla told her.

"John, you're more than welcome to stay, unless you're uncomfortable in the presence of so many women," Weir said.

"Outnumbered is more like it," he laughed. "So, if my lovely wife doesn't mind, I'm just going to leave you ladies to have all the fun."

He looked to Logan for confirmation that it was okay with her and, at her nod, he quickly kissed her and bolted from the room. The women waited until the door closed before dissolving into giggles.

"Well, then... Where is that beautiful baby of yours?" Weir asked.

Logan hopped up and went into the other room to retrieve her daughter. When she came back, the others "oohed" and "awwed" over the tiny little beauty, every one of them remarking on how she'd inherited Sheppard's hair. Chelsea seemed to take it all in stride as the women took turns holding and cooing to her, while Logan opened gift after gift. When she'd gotten to the bottom of the pile, Carter announced that they weren't finished yet and ran to the door.

Logan's eyes widened as Carter wheeled in a beautiful old-fashioned stroller, more like an English Pram, and announced that it was a gift from General Hammond. Next came an intricately carved wooden crib, a gift from General O'Neill. Then came an adorable changing table, which McKay and Beckett sent jointly. Lastly, she brought in a lovely musical baby swing, a gift from General Caldwell. Each gift brought new tears to her eyes and a lump to her throat. It was beyond generous, what these people were doing for them, and she felt completely unworthy.

"Thank you," she sniffed, looking around at all the gifts. "Thank you so much...I don't know...I can't imagine how you were able to do all this... so quickly..."

"It pays to have connections!" Weir winked.

"You are all... too kind..." Logan croaked.

"There should be no doubt in your mind, whatsoever, that you are loved by all of us, or that you were missed terribly during the time you were away." Teyla hugged her affectionately.

"Thank you," Logan sniffed again.

"And we're all going to do whatever it takes to make sure both you and John remain in Atlantis... together... with your daughter." Carter assured her.

"That's right!" The others chimed in unison.

"That means so much to us... It was... awful... not being able to tell you all... about us..." she stammered.

"It's something we can all understand, Logan," Weir told her.

"And apparently something that didn't really surprise any of you!" Logan chuckled.

"Not necessarily true," Weir corrected. "I think we were all pretty surprised, initially... Then, the more we thought about it, the more it made sense. You and John were made for each other."

"Yeah? Well WE think so," Logan agreed.

"How is John dealing with fatherhood?" Fraser asked.

Logan beamed happily. "After the initial shock, you mean?"

They all laughed as they imagined the look on Sheppard's face when he found out.

"He's been really great... He's fallen head over heels in love with her, of course. He needs to master the fine art of diaper changing, but he's been wonderful with her."

"I can't get over how MUCH she looks like him," Kitah said.

"She's a virtual clone... And I can say that with authority since I've known him since we were babies!" Logan chuckled.

They spent the rest of the afternoon chatting, eating and helping Logan set up a makeshift nursery in one corner of the bedroom. Chelsea was still tiny enough to sleep in the cradle Caldwell had loaned to them, so she kept that at the foot of their bed, while the crib went into the corner, flanked by the changing table. The swing was set up near the balcony door. The pram stayed in the outer room, ready for an evening stroll along the pier.

By the time Sheppard returned, most everyone had gone. He looked around in wonder at all the gifts they'd received for the baby. It didn't even look like his quarters anymore, not that he was complaining. Weir waited for everyone to leave before approaching them.

"Just so you know, we already have plans to move the three of you to larger quarters, one with an additional bedroom for the baby."

They stared at her incredulously. "Elizabeth... You don't even know if we'll be here much longer." Sheppard gasped.

"Yes I do. I'm more than confident that you will be. That being the case, you definitely need larger accommodations. All this (pointing around the room) is not likely to be the last of the gifts you'll be getting, I'm sure."

"Elizabeth... That's so..."

"Practical?" she smiled.

"Generous," they replied in unison.

"Uh-oh... Now I KNOW it's time to go, when the two of you start talking in unison," she laughed.

Both Sheppard and Logan hugged and thanked her again and Sheppard showed her to the door. Turning to face his wife, he smiled and held out his arms to her. Logan stepped into his embrace as a single tear slid down her cheek.

"We are SO lucky to have these people in our lives," she murmured.

"And on our side," he agreed.

"Where's the cadet?" he asked, looking around.

"Sleeping," she murmured.

"REALLY...?" he waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"Yes..." she smiled up at him.

"Wanna make-out?" he asked.

"ALWAYS!" she tightened her arms around his waist.

TWO DAYS LATER

Logan let out a wolf-whistle when Sheppard walked into their quarters. He was in dress-blues, like herself, looking even more drop-dead gorgeous than usual. She'd always loved him in his dress uniform, though he rarely had occasion to wear it, especially here.

"Back atcha, Mamasita!" he leered.

"You hear that sound?" she asked.

Sheppard listened intently. "No... What sound?"

"THAT, my love, is the sound of all the hearts you've just broken, letting them see you like this and the word is out that you are OFFICIALLY spoken for."

"Har-har," he snorted. "But, speaking of heartbreakers," he swooped in and dipped her backwards, stealing a kiss as he did so. "You look mighty fine for an old married woman," he teased.

"Charmer!" she slapped at him playfully. "How's my hair?" she asked.

"I like it better down," he replied honestly.

"Yes, dear, I know, but not on duty. Especially not in front of a review board! We've flaunted enough regs, don't you think?"

"I suppose..." he sighed wistfully. "You ready to walk into the lion's den?"

Her face clouded. "Not really, but we have no choice, right?"

"It isn't the review board you're worried about, is it? It's Chelsea."

Logan winced. "She's not even a month old and they want me to leave her in another galaxy?!" her eyes began to tear up.

"Awww... Sweetie, I'm sorry... I thought I told you. Janet is coming with us to the SGC, she's gonna watch Chelsea there for us."

Logan brightened immediately. "What?! Really?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry I forgot to tell you," he hugged her fiercely.

"You're forgiven!" she smiled and kissed him.

They broke apart at the knock on the door. "That must be Janet," Sheppard said, heading for the door.

"Hi, you two. Ready to go?" Fraser asked.

"Ready as we'll ever be," they responded together.

"Good thing you two won't be standing up there at the same time!" she chuckled, shaking her head.

"I'll get Chelsea," Sheppard said and disappeared into the other room.

"How are you REALLY?" Fraser asked.

"I'm fine... mostly."

"It'll work out, Logan, I'm sure of it," Fraser said, giving her hand a squeeze.

"From your lips..." Logan sighed.

Sheppard emerged from the bedroom with a little pink bundle in tow. "Ready?" he asked.

"Let's do it," Logan said, taking the diaper bag from Sheppard.

They were surprised to find that neither Weir nor Caldwell were in the control room to see them off, but they had no time to dwell on it or even question it. Fraser took the diaper bag from Logan, and stepped through the event horizon. Holding Chelsea securely in his arms, Sheppard winked at Logan and the three of them went through together. They were met on the other side by General Landry, standing at the bottom of the ramp. Sheppard quickly handed the baby over to Fraser, so that both he and Logan could salute the General.

"At ease, Colonel's," he said. "And welcome back to Earth." Then to Logan he added, "Colonel Devane, it's good to see you in one piece. We thought we'd lost you there for a while."

"Thank you, sir. It's good to be back in uniform again." she smiled nervously, wondering how long she would actually be allowed to wear that uniform.

"If you'll follow me, I think we're ready for you."

"Yes, sir!" they replied together.

Landry led them to the conference room overlooking the gateroom. Logan was ordered to wait in the General's office, while Sheppard was taken before the review board first. Sheppard flashed her a confident smile and then followed the General inside. He was surprised to find that he knew each and every member of the board, and knew them quite well. He stood until ordered to take a seat at the small table directly in front of the board.

As ranking officer, General Hammond spoke first. "Colonel John Sheppard, do you understand the reason for the convening of this review board?"

"Yes sir, I do," Sheppard replied.

"Do you have any questions before we begin?"

"No sir."

"Very well, let's begin then. For the record, the board consists of myself, General Jack O'Neill, General Harold Landry and General Steven Caldwell; all of whom have experience within the Stargate Program and Homeworld Security."

Sheppard answered questions for the better part of two hours. they questioned him about his military education, training and experience, first on Earth and then in the Pegasus Galaxy. Finally, the subject turned to his relationship with fellow Colonel, Logan Devane, and the surprise birth of their child.

Sheppard freely admitted to having a personal, as well as professional relationship with her, pointing out that every higher-up in the chain of command had always known that the two of them were close, that they'd in fact, grown up together, and it had never gotten in the way of the duties they performed. His admission that they were married, rather than simply fraternizing appeared to go a long way toward softening their demeanor.

"When did the two of you get married?" Hammond asked.

"When we returned to Earth for my father's funeral, sir."

Landry tried to hide a smile. "So, when Ba'al abducted you from that winery in Northern California, you were already married?"

"Yes sir," Sheppard confirmed.

"Never would have guessed," Landry admitted.

"Thank you, Colonel Sheppard. That'll be all for now," O'Neill said.

Sheppard stood, snapped to attention and saluted the four General's.

"Please send Colonel Devane in when you leave." O'Neill said.

"Yes sir."

Sheppard left the room, flashing Logan a hopeful smile as she stood there anxiously. "Your turn," he said.

Logan went to the door, pausing to take a deep breath and then stepped inside and repeated the same procedure Sheppard had earlier. Although she didn't know it at the time, she was asked the same questions Sheppard was asked, until they came to the day she and Mitchell were hurled through the Stargate to an isolated planet and stranded there.

She gave a detailed account of what had happened there, how they realized they were stranded, how they continued to search, in vain, for the DHD that no longer existed. She explained how the people in the village adhered to a strict religious code, that did not allow men and women to live together, not even brother and sisters past a certain age, and how they would have stoned Logan to death had she and Mitchell not pretended to be married, especially once they'd learned that Logan was pregnant.

"Why not tell them you were brother and sister and just live separately in the village?" Landry asked.

"I wouldn't have been allowed to be alone with Colonel Mitchell, not to continue searching for a DHD or to go anywhere with him. We needed to stay in close proximity to the gate, so we'd know if anyone came looking for us - and we could warn whoever came through that there was no way to dial out. We needed to be able to move around freely, to speak without having a chaperone there... It was... very primitive... by our standards."

"I see." Landry nodded. "And how far did this pretense go between yourself and Colonel Mitchell?"

"I beg your pardon, sir?" her eyes widened slightly, though she had known they might go there.

"Colonel Devane, you were trapped on an isolated planet together, with little to no hope of getting back home, or being rescued. Do you mean to tell this board that the two of you, professionals though you may be, never once felt tempted to turn that pretense into a reality?"

"I... Yes sir, that is exactly what I'm saying. Neither Colonel Mitchell nor myself crossed any boundaries. What we did, the pretense we engaged in, we did it for our own survival. At no time did either of us engage in any inappropriate behavior."

"Did Colonel Mitchell know you were married?" Hammond asked.

"I informed him of that shortly after we became stranded."

"Colonel Devane, who delivered your child?" Landry asked.

"Colonel Mitchell did, sir," she replied without flinching. "As he would have with any other medical field-ops necessity."

"Didn't they have doctors or something in that village?" O'Neill asked.

"They had a healer, but I went into labor very suddenly, in the middle of the night and in the middle of a thunderstorm. There was no way and no time for Colonel Mitchell to go and get him."

They continued to question her for another hour, longer than they had Sheppard, before excusing her. By the time she joined Sheppard in Landry's office, her stomach was tied in knots.

"How'd it go?" Sheppard asked.

"I dunno," she shrugged. "Have you seen Janet?"

"No..." he was cut off by the sound of approaching footsteps.

They were surprised to see Weir escorted through the office, where they were waiting, to the conference room. They did not speak, but Weir winked at them before disappearing through the door. The rest of the day, they watched as, one by one, virtually all of their colleagues were marched into the conference room to speak before the board. Logan was able to duck out several times, so she could feed and cuddle with her daughter. When it was Fraser's turn to speak to the board, she handed Chelsea over to them.

The four General's asked each one of the *witnesses* the same question:

"Have you ever known Colonel Sheppard and Colonel Devane to act inappropriately or unprofessionally while on duty - or to put other personnel in jeopardy in order to ensure the safety and well-being of one another?"

The answer came back the same from every single person who testified: "No. Never."

It was well into the evening by the time the board had finished questioning everybody. After a few moments deliberation, Landry came out and ordered Sheppard and Logan to return to the conference room.

AUTHOR'S NOTE ******** _ **HUGE**_ CREATIVE LICENSE TAKEN WITH A.F. REGS HERE********

Logan and Sheppard stood at attention before the board and waited somewhat nervously for their decision. They would accept whatever the General's decided, but part of that acceptance might mean one or both of them resigning their commissions.

"Colonel Devane, Colonel Sheppard, it is the decision of this review board that you remain on active duty in the Pegasus Galaxy..." General Hammond began.

Neither one of them dared breathe.

"Colonel Sheppard will resume his duties, as before, directly under the command of General Caldwell. Regarding the matter of punitive measures, it is the decision of this board that Colonel Sheppard shall forfeit six months pay."

'No problem there,' Sheppard thought to himself. It wasn't like he needed money to live in Atlantis.

"Colonel Devane, it is the decison of this board that you, also, remain on active duty in the Pegasus Galaxy..." Hammond continued.

"However, Colonel Devane will no longer, at least for the foreseeable future, be leading an SG-Team on off-world missions. It is the decision of this board that Colonel Devane shall assume the duties of Head of Security for the Atlantis base, answering directly to General O'Neill or myself under the command of Homeworld Security, rather than Pegasus Command. Further, it is ordered that Colonel Devane forfeit all pay for six months," Hammond finished.

"Any questions?" asked O'Neill.

"No, sir." They replied in unison.

"Colonel Sheppard, you will return to active duty in one week. Colonel Devane, we can discuss plans for you when we return to Atlantis," said Caldwell.

"Yes, sir." They replied, again, in unison.

"You are dismissed," Hammond informed them.

They saluted, turned and walked out of the room on shaking legs. When they were sure they were alone, and unobserved, Sheppard scooped Logan into his arms and kissed her happily.

"How the hell did THAT happen?" she asked in disbelief.

"I don't know, and at this point, I really don't care. All I care about is that we get to go home - TOGETHER - and we get to keep doing our jobs..." he paused suddenly and looked over at her.

"Are you okay with their decision to make you H.O.S?" he asked.

"Oh...Yeah...I...yes."

"Wow...That's succinct, hon," he teased.

"I just... We never did have a chance to discuss it, but... I... don't you think it's a good idea if ONE of us isn't constantly going off-world on dangerous missions?"

"Yesssss, but?"

"No but's... I really would have a hard time leaving her to go traipsing all over the galaxy now. I think... this works for us."

"Can you live with it?" he asked.

"Yes, I can... I'm a little... sad... maybe, that I can't go off like I used to, but..." she trailed off with a sigh.

"But?"

"I guess it means more to me now to 'stay home' than go running around the galaxy chasing bad guys. And I'm still doing my part to safeguard Atlantis."

"You're sure?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"I'm sure," she managed a little half-smile.

"Okay then... What say we go find the cadet and take her home?" he chirped.

"Yes... What say we," she agreed.

They strode down the hall together, a new bounce in their stride now that they knew they could remain together in Atlantis.


	43. Chapter 43

On their way to pick up Chelsea from Fraser's temporary quarters, Sheppard was waylaid by a couple of pilots he knew, who wanted to catch up on what he'd been doing. Logan cheerily sent him off with them and continued on to Fraser's quarters. When she turned down the hall, she bumped into Fraser, who was conspicuously baby-free. She explained that she'd been called to the infirmary, but had left Chelsea in capable hands. Logan thanked her and watched her walk away.

As she opened the door, she heard a male voice speaking in very animated terms. Mitchell. She hadn't seen him since they'd been rescued and she'd missed his constant, steady presence. She smiled at the sight of Mitchell lying on his back on the bed, Chelsea sprawled on his chest, listening raptly while he read her a story.

Mitchell saw her come in, but he didn't miss a beat in the story he was telling. He had Chelsea's full attention and she didn't want to interrupt them. She'd been wondering how aware her daughter really was about Mitchell's sudden absence from her life. Her fussiness lately could have been about any number of the changes she'd recently undergone in her young life, but looking at the two of them now, she was struck by how big a role Mitchell had played since her birth, and even before. She would have known his voice from the womb, of course, and then his touch for those two weeks when he'd been *father* to her.

She had bonded quickly with Sheppard, and growing moreso every day, but... she sighed sadly. She must, on some level, have missed Mitchell once she was brought to Atlantis and he returned to Genoa. It was clear how much Mitchell had missed Chelsea. He'd always lit up when he held her, but he seemed especially happy right now. Logan turned away for a moment as the guilt and pain threatened to overwhelm her suddenly. However unintentional, she was responsible for causing this man a great deal of pain. She knew he loved her, and loved Chelsea, as if they were his own. For a while, they had been, sort of. She also knew there was nothing she could do about his pain, and that saddened her even more.

Logan loved Sheppard beyond all reason, and she would continue to do so forever. There was nothing she could ever do to change that, nor would she ever want to. That didn't mean, however, that she couldn't feel... affection... for Cameron Mitchell. She had grown to love him during the time they'd been stranded together, but that love was _very_ different than the love she felt for Sheppard; and definitely not the kind of love that Mitchell felt for her and longed for in return.

"So... What's the verdict?" he asked, jolting her from her reverie.

"Oh! Uh... we get to stay in Pegasus..."

"Sweet! I knew you guys would be okay," he smiled warmly.

"I didn't see you go in, but I assume you put in an appearance before the board?"

"Yep. Told 'em they'd be damned fools to take either of you away from Atlantis."

"I see... Damned fools?"

"Yep, THOSE words precisely... Was it...awful for you?" he eyed her with concern.

"The waiting was the worst part... Cam..."

He held up a hand to stop her. "I spoke only the truth, Logan."

"Of course you did, I wouldn't expect otherwise. I just wanted to say..."

"You don't have to thank me," he interrupted her again.

"Yes... I do... And not just for today."

"We've talked about this before, Logan... There's nothing more to say about it," he reminded her.

"You know how much you mean to me... to _us_... don't you?"

Pain washed across his eyes for just a split second before he answered. "I do."

"Chelsea's really missed you, you know?" she shifted focus away from herself and onto the baby.

Mitchell brightened. "I've been missing her, too. I keep waking up in the middle of the night, wondering why she isn't demanding to be fed..."

"You don't have to stay away... Please, Cam... You know you can come see her anytime..."

He smiled wanly. "I know... I haven't been, you know... It's been hectic, trying to catch up on what's been going on while we were gone, getting back into the routine..."

"Of course... You are back to leading SG-1, aren't you?"

"Yes. Carter was actually relieved not to have to LEAD anymore," he nodded, clearly relieved.

"More time to geek?"

Mitchell laughed at that. "Something like that."

Chelsea had enough of watching the two of them interact and felt it was time they paid more attention to her. She let out a disgruntled squawk and began to squirm in Mitchell's arms.

"Hey, hey now!" he mock-scolded her. "What's with the attitude, Missy?"

"I think she'd prefer your undivided attention," Logan chuckled.

"You may not have any siblings yet, young lady, but it's not too soon for you to learn the concept of sharing..." he informed her, walking to the other side of the room, bouncing and talking to her and she immediately calmed down, staring raptly at his face.

Logan and Sheppard were the last ones to return to Atlantis. They'd had a difficult time extricating themselves from the well-wishers at the SGC, as well as the ones who wanted to fuss over the baby. They'd been allowed to take a short side trip, before heading home, to collect a few personal items from storage and to do a little shopping for the baby. One of the things they'd retrieved from storage was the wedding album that had been hastily thrown together. They were now free to display those photographs in their quarters, since their marriage was no longer the well-kept secret it had once been.

Logan had also had a nice chat with General O'Neill, during which she thanked him profusely for his generosity and understanding in regards to... well... _everything_. He assured her that he knew she would continue to serve with honor and professionalism, just as she'd always done before. He reminded her that he'd witnessed her professionalism and dedication during her tumultuous relationship with Daniel - how she'd never let their personal relationship interfere with her duties - even when Daniel ascended and was gone for so long.

Sheppard's conversation with O'Neill was slightly less warm and fuzzy. O'Neill had warned him, in no uncertain terms, that he was now responsible for two souls that he personally held precious: Logan and Chelsea. Sheppard assured him that he felt the same way and that he would do everything in his power to make sure they were happy and loved and safe. He also thanked O'Neill for the crib he'd sent and promised to send pictures on a regular basis so that he could see how Chelsea was growing, as well as extending a personal invitation for him to visit his family whenever he wanted.

As they walked up the ramp toward the Stargate, they were startled but happy when O'Neill, Hammond and Landry came in and announced that they would be joining them for a short visit to Atlantis. Out of deference to their higher ranking officers, they stepped aside and let the three General's go through the gate first, then followed suit a moment later. When they emerged on the other side, they were stunned to find a crowd of people surrounding the gateroom.

"What's this?" Sheppard asked uneasily.

Weir and Caldwell stepped forward, to join O'Neill, Hammond and Landry. "This...(pointing around at the crowd)...is a surprise for you two... uh... three," she announced.

"We figured that you weren't able to do it up right the first time, since you didn't have all your friends and colleagues there to help, so we thought you might want to renew your wedding vows, in front of witnesses," O'Neill smirked.

They were completely taken aback and simply stood there staring around the room.

"Is that a no?" O'Neill prodded.

"No!" they shouted in unison.

"I mean...Yeah! We'd love to do this," Sheppard corrected.

"Great!" O'Neill grinned.

"Logan? If you'd like to change first?"

"Do I have time?" she asked.

"You are the bride," Hammond chuckled. "We can't really start without you!"

"Do you have something to wear?" Fraser whispered.

"In the bag I sent ahead of us..." she replied breathlessly.

Logan was led off by Fraser, Weir, Teyla and Carter to change her clothes, while Sheppard remained behind with Chelsea, who already looked adorable in a gauzy, white dress. The men took turns goo-gooing with the baby while they waited and Sheppard was introduced to the chaplain who was there to perform the ceremony.

She barely had time to take in the grandeur (to her anyway) of the new quarters she'd been assigned with Sheppard. It was bigger than she could have imagined, or hoped for, with plenty of room for the baby and her things. She quickly found the bag she'd sent ahead from Earth and ran into the bedroom to change. She gaped at what was, to her, an enormous bedroom with a private bath and access to the balcony. The sight of her dress laying out on the bed brought her back to the task at hand. She changed quickly and then went back to the other room to show the girls.

They all pronounced their approval, then set about helping her with her hair and makeup. By the time they were through, Logan felt as beautiful as she looked. Tears stung her eyes as she surveyed her friends gathered around her.

"This is how we wanted it to be the first time, but..." she choked up.

"We're here now," Weir said.

"And we always will be," Carter added.

"Thank you... All of you..." Logan croaked.

"Let us have no tears now, on this happy day," Teyla admonished.

"Right!" Logan sniffed.

Sheppard had eyes only for Logan as the music began and Logan appeared at the top of the stairs. She was wearing the same dress she'd worn when they were married in San Francisco and, though he never thought it possible, she looked even more beautiful than she had on that day. His eyes followed her as she descended the stairs and walked towards him on the arm of General Hammond.

Chuckles erupted all around as, upon catching sight of her mother, Chelsea began to babble incoherently as she lay slightly propped up in Fraser's arms. Sheppard, still in his dress uniform, reached out and took her hand in his, smiling happily as they faced the chaplain. It was a beautiful ceremony, and there were many happy tears shed throughout the room while they exchanged vows. When they'd finished their vows and the ceremony was over, Sheppard took her in his arms and passionately kissed his bride to the raucous applause of everyone present.

A huge reception followed and continued on well into the evening. By the time all the festivities were winding down, Logan and Sheppard were exhausted. Fraser had taken Chelsea back to her temporary quarters, so as to give the not-so-newlyweds one night alone together, several hours before Logan and Sheppard packed it in - but not before taking time to thank everyone for all that they had done.

As she stood before them, Logan's eyes settled briefly on a few of the people who had been so important to her over the years. They were all still there: O'Neill. Daniel. Teal'c. Carter. Fraser. Weir. Teyla. Hammond. McKay. Beckett. Lorne. Bates. Her breath caught... Mitchell... They all meant so much to her, and she was eternally grateful that she would be allowed to stay here with them. Her eyes finally settled on her husband. THIS was what life was all about. THIS is part of the reason they did what they did and why continuing to fight the Wraith was so important.

They took their leave, after Logan tossed her bouquet, of course. Weir endured no end of ribbing when she ended up being the one to catch it. Logan hadn't aimed it directly at her, but she was happy Weir had been the one to catch it. It was her turn now to find someone worthy of her.

Logan giggled girlishly when Sheppard hoisted her into his arms upon reaching their quarters.

"I've already been here, remember?"

"That doesn't negate tradition," he reminded her as he carried her over the threshold.

"Wow..." he murmured as he looked around with wide eyes.

"It's huge, isn't it?"

"Yeah... The quarters are pretty big, too," he teased lecherously.

Logan slapped him playfully, then kissed him deeply until, weak with desire, he set her back on her feet.

"I love you, Logan," he murmured.

"I love you, too, John."


	44. Chapter 44

Alarms were blaring all over the city when Logan charged into the control room.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Long range sensors are picking up a signal in Delta quadrant," Zelenka informed her.

"Wraith?" she asked.

"Doesn't look like any Wraith signature we've seen before," he replied.

"You don't recognize it?" brows knitted together in puzzlement.

"Sorry Colonel, it's one we've never seen before," he said warily.

Caldwell and Weir rushed into the control room from opposite directions and headed up the stairs towards her.

"What have we got?" Caldwell asked.

"Dr. Zelenka picked up an unknown ship headed our way," she informed them.

"Unknown? So it's not Wraith?"

"At least not anything Wraith we've seen before," she muttered.

"How long before it arrives?" Weir asked.

"At it's current rate of speed... About two hours," Zelenka informed them.

"Cloak the city," Caldwell and Logan ordered together.

Zelenka immediately turned on the cloaking device and waited for further instructions while keeping an eye on the approaching vessel.

"Let's get word to all our off-world teams to either get home now, or sit tight until we give them the all-clear," Logan ordered.

Bates, who was never far from her side now that she had taken over as Head of Security, immediately began dialing the gate addresses where the four off-world teams were working.

"If it's not Wraith, who else could it be?" Weir asked.

"As far as we know, there is nobody else capable of interstellar travel," Caldwell replied.

"We've certainly never run into anyone who even came close. Ronan's people might have been capable before they were decimated by the Wraith, but they're so scattered..." Logan trailed off.

"Whoever it is, let's just make sure we don't give away our carefully guarded secret, alright?" Weir sighed.

"Works for me," Logan quipped.

"Keep us informed, Colonel?" Caldwell said.

"Yes sir," she replied.

Logan had been back to work for two months now, and this was the first incident that had even remotely threatened the security of Atlantis in all that time. At times she had been extremely bored by the repititive nothingness going on but, at other times, she was grateful for the routine. Her schedule allowed her to spend a great deal of time with Chelsea, for which she was eternally grateful. She could often zip down to the nursery just to hold and cuddle her daughter at virtually any time of the day.

Lyta and Kitah had come up with the idea for the nursery, since babies now seemed to be popping up all over the city. Several of the Athosian women took turns manning the nursery, so they never had a shortage of able caretakers at their disposal. Logan trusted Lyta and Kitah implicitly with the care of her daughter, knowing that they cared for her as lovingly as they cared for their own children. Logan was also pleased that Chelsea would be growing up around Daniel's son and Caldwell's children. The three infants had become fast friends - inasmuch as babies could form friendships - that was. They'd remarked on how, whenever one of the babies was fussy or unhappy, all they had to do was place them in close proximity to the others and they would calm right down.

Another interesting thing was how Hope, now a busy toddler, would often appear to "watch over" the three infants. She would be off playing, then suddenly stop what she was doing and make a beeline over to the babies to check on them. She appeared utterly enchanted with them and would babble incessantly to them whenever she came near, as if sharing an important insight or bit of news with them. Teyla and Teal'c had done a marvelous job with her. She was a happy, secure child, and very loved by her adoptive parents. Logan had been amazed, upon returning, to find that she appeared to have less and less a Wraithlike appearance than she had at birth.

"Colonel Devane?"

Bates interrupted her reverie. "Yes, Lieutenant?"

"I've contacted all the teams. Two are returning immediately, but Major Lorne's and Colonel Sheppard's will be remaining off-world for the time being," he reported.

"Problems?" she asked.

"No ma'am."

"Good. I'd like you to make sure the cloak and the shields are running at full capacity and that we don't have any glitches please?"

"Yes ma'am," Bates saluted and pulled Zelenka aside to run a full diagnostic on the "security-blanket" around the city and the mainland.

"Logan?"

She turned to find Caldwell standing in the doorway. "Hi," she greeted.

"What's happening with that incoming ship?"

"Nothing, zip, zero, zilch, nada, bupkis..." she replied absently.

"Logan...?"

"Sorry sir... We don't know anything more about it, or its origins than we did an hour and a half ago. We're secure though, as is the mainland. They won't see us, whoever they are."

Caldwell stepped inside and closed the door. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"I know you better than that... What is it?" he prodded.

She let out a long, deep sigh. "Really sir, it's nothing."

"It's getting to you, isn't it?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"What?"

"Cabin fever. It's not like it hasn't happened before."

"I'm fine, Steve."

"I know you are. But I also know that going from field work to what basically amounts to deskwork is a difficult transition."

She smiled up at him. "I guess you would, wouldn't you?"

"Yes I would... How bad is it?"

"Really, it's not that bad. I do enjoy being able to go down to the nursery whenever I want, and being able to spend evenings with my baby..."

"I understand, Logan."

"I know you do, and really, I'm not complaining. You all could have booted us out of here altogether, so I'm not about to look a gift horse in the mouth," she assured him.

He nodded then came over and sat on the edge of her desk. "Logan, never for a moment doubt that what you are doing here now is very valuable. Your experience in the field is what makes you especially qualified to ensure the security of this base and the mainland. You know how to look for situations that some pencil pusher wouldn't even dream of."

"Thank you, Steve... Your confidence in me means the world," she smiled warmly at him.

He leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. "My confidence in you is something you EARNED a long time ago."

"I won't let you down, Steve, I promise."

"I know that. Now, what say we go see what that ship is up to?" he stood up and headed for the door.

Logan pushed back her chair, stood up and followed him from the room. When they reached the control room they found that nothing had changed, as far as identifying the owner or occupants of the approaching ship. Even with the long range scanners and sensors, the now visible ship remained a mystery.

"Sir... Where is the Daedalus right now?" Logan asked.

"She's enroute from Genoa, should be here any moment now, why?"

"Maybe Hermiod will be able to identify them," she ventured.

"What makes you think so?"

She shrugged. "I dunno. Wishful thinking maybe, but the Asgard have been *out there* a lot longer than we have. Maybe he's run across a few more races capable of intergalactic travel, too."

As if on cue, a radio transmission came in from the Daedalus. "Atlantis, this is Novak, we are cloaked and assuming geo-sync orbit above the planet."

" Daedalus, this is Caldwell. Welcome back. I need to speak with Hermiod, so if you could please have him beam down to Atlantis control immediately?"

"Yes sir."

An instant later, Hermiod stood in the control room next to them. "Greetings General Caldwell, Colonel Devane."

"Hello Hermiod," Logan smiled at him.

"I understand there is a ship approaching that you have been unable to identify," he said, getting right down to business.

"Yes..." Logan nodded, punching up the screen showing the approaching ship. "This one here. It doesn't fit any known Wraith signature we have, and we don't know of any other race in Pegasus technologically advanced enough to have something like this, so..."

"Do you recognize it?" Caldwell asked.

Hermiod studied the image for a moment, then the data streaming in from the sensors. "It seems somewhat familiar to me, but I am afraid I cannot place it."

"Think, Herm, think!" Logan urged.

Bates pulled Logan aside and whispered in her ear. "Uh...General?" Logan pointed to the monitor. "The ship has settled into orbit above the planet now."

"Above the city?" he asked.

"No sir. They're somewhat northeast of our position...(pointing) and they're scanning the area."

"Well, no one's been able to detect us through the shields before, let's hope our luck holds," Caldwell grunted.

Logan, Caldwell, Weir, Bates and Hermiod all watched Zelenka's monitor, held their collective breath and waited.

ON BOARD THE ALIEN SHIP

"Anything?" Tarik asked.

"I'm not picking up any life signs, aside from plant and animal life, on the planet," came the reply from a nearby technician.

"Animal? What manner of animal life?" Tarik stared at him, pleased but surprised.

"Fish, foul... some mammal."

"Interesting... But nothing else? No sign of civilization?" he prodded.

"No, Tarik..."

"And the atmosphere is compatible with our needs?" he went on.

"It is."

"We may have found what we've been looking for then."

"Shall we send a team down to scout the land?" the technician asked.

"Yes... I want Gere and Loteh to lead them," Tarik replied.

"Very well."

Tarik stood on the bridge and looked out over the vast expanse of sea surrounding the land mass on the planet. They'd been searching for safe haven for so long. Far too long now. He scarcely dared to hope that their long search was finally at an end. His people had almost completely been annhilated at the hands of the Goa'uld, and only a few hundred remained to try and rebuild their once thriving population. They'd finally left their old galaxy after searching in vain for a suitable planet - one far enough away from more primitive people's - and come to the Pegasus Galaxy in hopes of a more safe and solitary existence.

Finding this planet had been an unexpected stroke of luck. The fact that it was uninhabited - something that made no sense given the vast planetary resources - was extremely fortuitous. Once they'd ensured that the planet was, indeed, suitable for their needs, they would be able to settle in and begin rebuilding their lives. Prudence dictated that they eventually explore some of the other worlds in this galaxy, to see what other life forms might exist here, but first and foremost, they had to establish their colony.

"Colonel Devane! I'm picking up life signs on the mainland!" Zelenka shouted.

"What? The Athosians? They know better than to go past the perimeter during a lockdown!"

"I don't think it's the Athosians," Zelenka informed her.

"Why?"

"The life signs just... appeared...Out of nowhere."

"As if they were beamed in?" Caldwell asked.

"Exactly."

"So they're from the ship... How close are they to the village?"

Zelenka checked again and shook his head. "Very. Five kilometers to the west and they'll bump right into the shield."

"Crap!" she muttered.

"There's no time to intercept them by jumper," Bates announced.

"No... Daedalus?" she looked up at Caldwell.

"That'll work, but again, we run the risk of detection... They may not be Wraith, but that doesn't necessarily mean they're friendly either."

"True... I don't think we have much choice at this point, though, do you?" she asked.

"No, we don't. Take Bates and... how many life signs, Doctor?"

Zelenka checked again. "Ten."

"Take two teams with you," he ordered.

Logan tried to refrain from smiling as she stood aside with Bates to be beamed aboard the Daedalus and then transferred to the mainland. Caldwell radioed the Daedalus and gave them instructions before Logan and Bates disappeared from the control room in a flash of bright light. Within a few minutes, two full security teams from the Daedalus met them on the bridge for transport to the mainland. While the ship maneuvered into position, to hide in the sun long enough to de-cloak, transport them and then re-cloak, so the people on the unknown ship could not see them. Logan instructed Novak to beam them down about a kilometer away from the life signs on the surface so that they could observe the newcomers, hopefully without being seen.

Moments later, the light flashed again and Logan found herself standing on the mainland. She quietly dispersed her security team and went in search of the strangers. It didn't take long for them to locate them. They had split up into two teams of five each, as Logan's people had, but the strangers remained fairly close together. Something about them struck her as being familiar, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. She had hoped to simply observe them from a distance, but unfortunately, they were heading right for the Athosian village.

Signaling silently to Bates, she gave the order to surround and contain them. They quickly encircled the cautious newcomers and, with a wave from Logan, the Lantean teams emerged from cover, stunners aimed at each one of the newcomers. Startled and alarmed by the sudden appearance of armed men, the strangers pointed their weapons back at them.

"Hold!" ordered Logan, stepping forward.

Ten pairs of eyes followed her as she stepped out of the trees and walked into the circle her people formed around them.

"Which one of you is the leader?" she asked.

Gere stiffened and took one step forward. "I lead these men."

Logan moved to stand before him. "Thank you. Would you care to tell me what you and your people are doing here?"

"I was wondering the same thing about you and yours."

"I'm sure. But that doesn't answer my question."

"No, it doesn't."

Logan eyed him speculatively. "Does that mean you're not going to answer my questions?"

"That is a safe assumption."

"I see. Okay, let's try it this way. You and your people are on MY turf, and on my turf, we play by MY rules, which means that if I ask a question, I expect an answer. We treat you with respect, you show us the same courtesy. Deal?"

"I'm afraid not."

"You know...(turning to look at the faces of the others) There's something awfully familiar about you people, but I can't quite..."

At that moment, Logan caught sight of a device on the sleeve of one of the men's shirts. Her eyes widened as she recognized what it was and she gasped in recognition.

"Ma'am?" asked Bates anxiously.

Logan waved him off and returned to Gere, studying his face intently. Gere returned her gaze with as much curiousity.

"You... It can't be!" she exclaimed.

"What?" asked Bates.

Before she could answer, the entire group was transported all together, to the newcomers' ship. Logan's people were instantly surrounded, and weapons were aimed directly at their heads.

"Now we are on... what did you call it... MY turf," Gere said smugly.

"So it seems," she replied.

"And now you will answer our questions."

"Sure, no problem."

"Ma'am?" Bates murmured.

"It's alright, Bates. Stand down everyone. I know who they are," she told them.

"Do you now?" Gere asked.

"I do, though I'm not quite sure how you came to be here," she nodded, more than a little curious.

"Who is it you think we are?" Gere asked.

"Gere! Who are these people?" an angry voice said from the doorway.

Logan turned and gasped in surprise for the second time. The man in the doorway paused at her reaction to the sight of him and stared at her curiously.

"Why do you look at me this way?" he asked.

"I KNOW... you..." she said.

"You are mistaken... We know no one in this galaxy."

"Not here... I know it's been a long time but... I would know you anywhere."

He continued to stare at her in confused fascination. Whoever she was, she was certainly the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. He knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that if he had ever met her before, he certainly would never forget her.

"Narim... It's Logan Devane... We met on Earth."

Pain flashed through his eyes for a moment when she spoke the name "Narim." His reaction hadn't escaped her, but she stood there and waited for him to respond.

"I'm afraid you are mistaken," he said finally.

"I remember you quite well, and your friends, especially Omak."

"I am not who you think I am."

"No?" she asked. "But you ARE Tollan."

"Yes."

"Well, if you aren't Narim, you certainly bear a rather striking resemblance to him," she said.

"My name is Tarik... Narim was my brother... My _twin_ brother," he said sadly.

Then what they'd suspected long ago was true: Narim had been killed in the attack on Tollana by the Goa'uld. "Narim is..."

"Dead," he confirmed.

"I'm sorry... We'd suspected as much, when his communication was cut short all of a sudden, but when I saw you..." she shrugged.

"You knew my brother well?" he eyed her curiously.

"A friend of mine did."

He stifled a gasp. "You're not referring to... Samantha Carter, are you?"

"I am," she smiled.

"How is it possible that the Tau'ri managed to find their way here without the aid of ships or..."

"Originally we came through the stargate," she said.

"It was my understanding that the Tau'ri did not possess an adequate power source for such a long journey."

"We didn't...back then. We have...evolved...some, since then," she shrugged.

"Clearly," he smiled.

"Listen, Tarik... I would love to sit down and discuss things with you, but I need to ask you to send my people back down to the planet where you found us. My superior will have noticed our sudden disappearance and is likely already mustering the troops as we speak."

He studied her thoughtfully for a moment before replying. "You must also have some sort of cloaking technology, for you to be able to go undetected by our sensors."

"Yes."

"We chose this planet because there were no detectable human life signs here," he grimaced.

"Understandable. Tarik, I have to tell you, I'm quite familiar with the Tollan propensity towards distrusting those you view as primitive, however, if I can offer one piece of advice?"

"Certainly."

"This galaxy is free of the Goa'uld, as is the one we came from...now...however, there are beings here that make the Goa'uld look downright... childish in comparison."

"How so?"

"They are called 'Wraith' and they are very technologically powerful. They are also deadly. Long story short - they 'feed' on humans - and when I say 'feed' I really mean FEED, as in to consume for nourishment."

The Tollans looked appropriately horrified. "You are serious," he gasped.

"I am. They are the reason we've hidden our city and the village on the mainland. It was the ONLY way to keep them from destroying us and gaining access to Earth and our home galaxy."

"That is... horrible."

"Yes, it is. If you believe nothing else I say, believe that. They are extremely dangerous, and if you decide to make one of the planets here your new home, you need to know that they are not only technologically advanced, but numerically so. Please, Tarim, my people will gladly meet with you to discuss this and other matters, we can also help you find a suitable world for your people, if you let us. But for now, I really need to get my men back down to the planet before all hell breaks loose."

He paused, measuring the honesty in her words and tone, then nodded. "Very well. We will send them back. Are you willing to remain a little while longer?"

"I am - provided I can contact my superiors?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

"As you wish."

"Ma'am, I think I should stay with you," Bates suggested strongly.

"If I'm going to be away for a little while, I'd feel better knowing you were watching over the city, Lieutenant."

"But..."

"I'll be fine," she stated emphatically.

"You have my word, she will not be harmed." Tarik said.

Bates stared him down for a moment, then returned his gaze to Logan. "Yes, ma'am."

A moment later, Logan's people vanished from the Tollan ship and appeared back on the mainland, where another group of Lanteans were already searching for them.

"You're WHERE?!" Caldwell's exasperated tone was unmistakeable.

"I'm on board the Tollan ship, sir."

"Why?!" he demanded.

"Well...uh...I'm establishing diplomatic ties..." it sounded like more of a question than a statement.

"Colonel Devane... I'd like you to return to the city immediately," he said.

"I...yes sir..."

"Colonel Devane, this is Weir, please feel free to bring your new friend back with you, I'm sure we both have a lot of questions."

"Agreed...Obviously, for security reasons, you'll want us to transport back to the mainland first?"

"Obviously," Caldwell snorted sarcastically.

"I'll contact you when we reach the surface, Devane out."

Caldwell shook his head, tension in every line of his body. "Devane or Sheppard... It's ALWAYS Devane or Sheppard..." he muttered.

Back on the Tollan ship, Logan turned questioningly to Tarik. "You realize the incredible amount of trust I'm placing in you by agreeing to this?"

"I do," she smiled. "It is in the best interests of your people, too, Tarik. I can give you my word that we will not try to tell you what to do or how to live, or even demand an exchange of technology as terms for an alliance between our two peoples. I don't know how much your brother told you about us, or where we come from, but it is in our nature to HELP people whenever and wherever we can."

He seemed somewhat amused by that last statement. "You believe you can _help_... us?" he asked.

"You may be more advanced, technologically, but we know the neighborhood. We know the enemy - and we've managed to reduce their numbers significantly - but they're still out there. We've explored many worlds in this galaxy, and we can show you several suitable ones for you to choose from, if you decide to stay."

"Why would you do this?" he asked, clearly taken aback.

"It's what we do, Tarik. We're not always successful, but we do try."

"I see. And what of how my former government betrayed the people of Earth?"

Logan stiffened for a moment as she thought back to what had precipitated the Goa'uld attack on Tollana. "That was a long time ago,"

"Indeed."

"I think we're big enough to admit that it was not a betrayal by your entire civilization. Personally speaking, I think your people would have been outraged by the deal your governing council made with the Goa'uld," she told him.

"They would... those of us who survived were outraged,." he nodded.

"And do they blame the Tau'ri for defending ourselves?"

"Some do harbor some ill will, but most understand the situation your people were put in. Some of know that you simply couldn't stand by and let the Goa'uld destroy your world without so much as a fight."

"Then we're agreed, the past is the past," she smiled broadly.

"I will accompany you back to your city, along with those of us who are on the new governing council," he told her.

"How many?" she asked.

"Five of us, in total."

"Not a problem. While I cannot disclose the location of our city, at this point anyway, I can assure you that you will be free to contact your people any time you wish."

"Thank you."

"So...(looking around)...Who's coming with?" she asked.

Tarik motioned and four men who'd been standing back stepped forward, including the man she'd intercepted on the surface, Gere. Logan moved to stand next to Tarik. A moment later, she stood on the mainland. Keying her mic, she immediately called the Daedalus.

"Daedalus, this is Colonel Devane. There are six of us ready for transport, please inform Atlantis command."

"Understood, Colonel," Novak said.

One second she was standing on the mainland, the next, she was on board the Daedalus looking at Novak's smiling face. "Long time no see," Logan deadpanned.

"Yes ma'am, are you ready?" Novak bit back a smile.

"Ready."

Another bright flash of light and she was standing in the Atlantis conference room. She shook her head, from the slight head-rush of so many transports so close together. Caldwell and Weir were standing at the head of the conference table, Caldwell looking stern and forbidding, Weir was smiling warmly in welcome. Logan saluted Caldwell before speaking.

"General Caldwell, Dr. Weir, allow me to present members of the governing council of Tollan. Tarik, these are my superiors, General Steven Caldwell and Dr. Elizabeth Weir."

"Welcome," smiled Weir.

"Thank you," Tarik replied.

"Shall we sit?" Weir motioned to the chairs around the conference table.

After several hours they decided to take a break and stretch their legs. Caldwell gave Logan permission to show the Tollan delegation around the city and then departed to check on the off-world ops. Weir also excused herself and left the delegation in Logan's capable hands.

"Your city is most impressive," Tarik said glancing around.

"Yes it is, but we can't really take the credit for that, since it was built by the Ancients."

"I see... Still, for your people to have mastered the Ancient technology... You have come a long way since our two people's first met."

"That we have."

"The shield technology you possess...Is that Ancient as well?" Gere asked.

"Some. The shields around the city, many cities throughout the galaxy are of Ancient design, but our ships' shielding is Asgard, as is the transporter technology."

"We know of the Asgard, but we have never encountered them before," Tarik replied.

"They are one of our closest and most powerful allies. In fact, the Daedalus has an Asgard crew member on board."

"Really?" Tarik seemed genuinely intrigued. "I should very much like to meet him."

"I think that could be arranged," she said.

When they reached the mess hall, Logan asked if any of them were hungry. They replied that they were, and she invited them to join her for a bite to eat. They were intrigued by the many choices offered and soon the six of them were enjoying their food. Not that she noticed, or paid any particular mind to such things, Gere seemed quite unable to stop looking at her. Tarik had, initially, been equally enchanted by her beauty, but, having now met Elizabeth Weir, found himself more drawn to her some reason. Weir's beauty was somewhat more understated - quieter - than Logan's. But they both had a genuineness about them that spoke of honesty and trustworthiness. Logan was a bit more guarded than Weir, whom he suspected (correctly) of possessing a diplomat's soul.

Logan, as a soldier, would naturally be more 'closed off' than Weir, but that only served to heighten Gere's interest in her. Bates, of course, had noticed his intense fascination with Logan and had kept a close watch on the Tollan delegate. He wouldn't be the first man to develop inappropriate feelings for the Colonel, and probably wouldn't be the last. He could do nothing about the man's feelings, but he could make sure that he didn't get out of line. As they conversed, Logan saw Weir wave to her from the doorway, then step aside to allow Carter to look inside. She nodded imperceptibly and turned to Tarik.

"Tarik? May I speak with you privately for a moment, out in the hall?" Logan asked.

He looked surprised, but not displeased. "Certainly, Colonel."

She led him out to the hallway. "You remember when I mentioned Samantha Carter to you?"

"Yes."

"Would you be at all interested in meeting her?"

His eyes widened in surprise. "She is here?"

"She is. I'm sure she would very much like to meet you, but if you aren't comfortable with that..."

"I would be honored. My brother held her in the highest esteem."

She led him farther down the hall to a room near the end. Logan opened the door and ushered him inside. A tall, blonde woman was standing there with Dr. Weir. He watched her intently as she turned to face them and saw first-hand why his brother had been so taken with her at first glance. She was lovely, and intelligence glittered behind her clear blue eyes.

"Tarik, may I present Colonel Samantha Carter; Colonel, this is Tarik of Tollana..."

Carter's eyes watered slightly at the sight of him. It was like stepping back in time and meeting Narim for the first time. "I'm pleased to meet you," she stammered.

"Likewise... May I call you Samantha?"

She nodded. "Yes, of course."

"I believe I have something that used to belong to you," he said.

"Oh?"

"Schroedinger."

"You have Schroedinger? He's still alive?" she gasped in amazement.

"He ran from Narim's home during the bombings... I found him just as I was getting ready to step through the stargate. I knew Narim had been...lost... He was very fond of that cat."

"And vice-versa," she chuckled.

"Narim spoke very fondly of you, Samantha, and often."

"I was very fond of him, too. He told me he had a brother, but not that you were a twin."

"He meant to introduce us, but..."

"I was very sorry to hear about what happened to him."

"Thank you."

Logan broke in before the conversation got too personal.

"I uh... better get back to our other guests," she stammered.

"Yes, I'll leave the two of you to speak in private, if you'll excuse us, Tarik?" Weir asked.

Tarik gave her a half-bow. "I look forward to resuming our discussion, Dr. Weir."

Logan and Weir excused themselves and left the two of them alone.


	45. Chapter 45

As they walked back to the conference room, Gere pulled Logan aside when he heard the sound of children's voices. "There are young one's here?" he asked in shock.

"Yes, several."

She led him to a large room down the hall and around the corner. Hope was crawling around on the floor and Sam was playing with a huge pile of Lincoln Logs when they walked in. Sam took one look at her and launched himself off the chair he occupied.

"Lolo!" he cried, plowing into her outstretched arms.

"Hi Space Cowboy!" she chuckled.

"You see Chessie?" he asked.

"Yes, I'm here to visit all of you, but just for a few minutes. Sam, can you say hello to our visitor? This is Gere," she held tightly to his hand as he looked up shyly at the stranger.

"Hi," he said.

Gere squatted down so that he was eye-level with the young boy, who clearly worshipped Logan Devane. "Hello Sam, how are you?"

"I fine," Sam murmured.

"Young Sam is General Caldwell's son, and that little one over there is his daughter, Riley; They are my God-children."

"God-Children?" he blinked at her curiously.

"Something of an Earth-tradition. Basically, I have promised their parents that if anything ever happened to them, I will take care of the children. In more religious circles it means that I have agreed to be responsible for their Spiritual well-being and education."

"General Caldwell must have a great deal of trust in you," he noted.

"Yes, he does, and I take it very seriously. I delivered young Sam here, so I've been looking out for him ever since."

"I am confused. Are you a soldier or a doctor?"

Logan chuckled. "I get that alot. I am a soldier, who also happens to have medical training - what we call a 'Medic'," she explained.

"You have many talents," he observed.

She led him to an anteroom and headed straight for a crib on the end, where she picked up a small pink bundle. "This... (holding up a sleeping baby)... is my daughter, Chelsea," she beamed proudly.

His eyes widened. "Your... daughter?"

"My pride and joy," she nodded, an expression of happy contentment on her face.

"So you are... mated to someone?" he surmised, greatly disappointed.

"I am... My husband is also a soldier; a Colonel, like myself. He's currently off-world on a mission."

"He is a very fortunate man."

"Thank you, I try to remind him of that often!" she quipped jokingly.

She gently kissed her sleeping baby and placed her back in her crib, then turned and guided him back out again. "Samuel Caldwell, front and center!" she called.

Sam ran right up to her and executed a perfect salute.

"Excellent, Space Cowboy. I'm leaving you in charge of entertaining Chelsea, when she wakes up. Think you can handle that?"

"Yes, ma'am!" he saluted excitedly again.

"Good man, now give us a kiss!" she demanded.

Sam planted a sloppy kiss on her cheek and went back to playing with his toys. Gere took one last look around the nursery, his expression one of longing, then followed Logan out of the room.

"I take it you have no children of your own?" she asked.

"No. We have very few young, in fact. Our search for a new home has necessitated that we put off having off-spring until we can get settled somewhere."

"I see. All that is left of your people are on that one ship?"

"Yes, sadly."

"How many?"

"A little over two hundred."

"I'm sorry we couldn't do more to help you, when the Goa'uld attacked."

"Tarik was right. Perhaps if our government had more faith in the Tau'ri and less trust in the word of a Goa'uld, we might have been able to avert what happened. Their own arrogance caused our downfall, not anything your people did or didn't do."

"I have to admit that I agree with your assessment, but I am sorry you had to pay for what they did."

"Thank you. You're very kind."

"Hardly," she chuckled. "But I'll take the compliment."

When they arrived back in the conference room, the discussion was already underway.

"We have many outposts sprinkled throughout the galaxy; it's easier to protect the worlds we have promised to protect from the Wraith. But there are a great deal of suitable worlds out there for you to begin rebuilding your civilization. My people can take you, or we can give you the coordinates," Weir explained.

"That is a very generous offer," Tarik said.

"We try to be good neighbors," she smiled. "Heaven knows, if you decide to stay, you'll need good neighbors to off-set the bad ones."

"The Wraith?"

"Exactly. I don't mean to sound discouraging, but knowing what you went through at the hands of the Goa'uld... This galaxy is not the peaceful refuge you were probably envisioning," Weir warned.

"Every galaxy has its equivalent of the Goa'uld menace."

"I suppose so," she admitted. "Does this mean that you plan to stay?"

"We have traveled a very long way... and we must settle soon."

"We'll do whatever we can to help you. In the meantime, you are welcome to remain in Atlantis, if you wish, until you decide what it is you want to do."

"You are most kind and generous," Tarik smiled.

Logan returned to her quarters later that evening, following a walk on the pier with her daughter. She was pleasantly surprised to find Sheppard home early from his off-world mission.

"Hey flyboy!" she chirped happily.

"Hi gorgeous! And hello cadet!" he reached out and took Chelsea from the stroller.

"How's Daddy's girl?" he cooed, kissing her face.

Chelsea babbled happily, if incoherently.

"Have you been taking good care of Mommy while I was away?"

Logan watched him lay on the bed with Chelsea atop his chest as he babbled and cooed incessantly to her. She fell deeper and deeper in love with him every time she saw him with their daughter. He was every bit the amazing father she always knew he would be. After a few moments, Sheppard caught her watching him out of the corner of his eye.

"What?" he grinned sheepishly.

"Oh... I was just wondering when it'll be MOMMY'S turn?" she chided him playfully.

"Mommy gets her turn when the cadet goes to sleep," he waggled his eyebrows at her.

"Promises, promises," she murmured, sashaying into the bathroom to run a bath for Chelsea.

"I hear we have some visitors," he called out.

"Yup!"

"You knew these guys before?"

"Not these particular guys. SG-1 rescued a group of Tollans who were near death because of volcanic eruptions on their planet. They were supposed to be rescued by their own people, but their ship was too late getting there. Carter befriended one of them, or rather he befriended her - he had a wicked crush on her - and we developed a sort of friendship with them."

"Until the Goa'uld got involved?"

"Right. Anyway, one of the men we met today, Tarik, is the twin brother of that man."

"What happened to his twin?" he asked.

"He was killed when the Goa'uld attacked Tollana."

"That sucks. So, how do you think it went?"

She shrugged. "Personally, I think they're going to stay - actually, I don't think they have a choice, not that they came right out and admitted it. Their whole population is all on board that one ship, and they've been traveling for a very long time."

"You think they're out of supplies or something?"

She nodded. "Supplies, food, fuel... All of it. We made it clear that it would be no picnic for them living in Pegasus."

"How'd they take it?"

"They were suitably horrified, but like I said, I don't think they have a choice. They're far more technologially advanced than we are, but they're still going to need our help... At least at first."

"Do you trust them?"

"Not implicitly, but they seem like good enough people."

Sheppard carried Chelsea into the bathroom, removed her clothes and began bathing her. She squealed and splashed until Sheppard was as soaked as she was.

Logan shook her head and laughed. "You know, you'd be better off just taking her with you into the shower!"

"I'll remember that for next time," he grinned and continued making faces at his daughter.

Logan held out a towel. "Gimme," she said.

Sheppard handed the squirming bundle to her and headed for the shower. Logan quickly dried, diapered and dressed Chelsea in a lightweight sleeper before settling in the rocking chair to nurse her. Fortunately, Chelsea was very tired, as she didn't nurse for too long before falling asleep in her arms. Logan gingerly stood up and carried her to her crib, settling her in without waking her up.

Sheppard was still in the shower, so she slipped out of her clothes and into the shower behind him. He smiled as he felt her arms come around him and felt her press against his back.

"And I was just about to get out," he told her.

"But I need you to scrub my back," she replied.

"Is that all?" he turned to shoot her a meaningful glance.

"Well, you DID say it was Mommy's turn, once Chelsea went to sleep..."

"That I did," he grinned, backing her up against the wall and covering her mouth with his own.

Over the next few days, Sheppard's team, along with SG-1 escorted the Tollan delegation to several different planets they felt might be suitable for their needs. One of the planets had been the site of an Ancient abandoned city that they had decided not to place an outpost on, since there was another outpost very close by. They had, however removed all the equipment and databases, leaving behind only a shell - buildings - that was ready to occupy should they have the need. Sheppard thought this planet would fulfill any need the Tollans might have, both now and in the future. The Lanteans could provide shield technology to protect their new city while they got settled in, so they wouldn't have to be concerned about attack from the Wraith.

The Tollans seemed to agree with his assessment, as this was the only planet that had so far piqued their interest. Sheppard preferred dealing with Tarik, for the most part, because Gere was often sullen and apparently annoyed with Sheppard for some reason. Tarik, on the other hand, seemed a friendly sort, and he was quite taken with Weir. Sheppard knew how lonely Weir had been since coming to Atlantis, and he thought (though he'd never admit it) that Tarik might be good for her. Clearly, he thought to himself, he'd been hanging around his wife too long!

Mitchell had noticed the way Gere reacted to Sheppard and he'd been keeping a close eye on him throughtout their travels. Before long, he detected a pattern to Gere's behavior and found the possible reason for his unprovoked animosity. The only time Gere ever really paid attention to Sheppard was when someone brought up the subject of his wife and daughter. Logan's brief time on board their ship had made quite an impression on the Tollans, one he understood all too well. A beaming Sheppard was all too happy and proud to extoll her virtues to anyone who asked. It was during these times that Gere appeared to be very interested in what Sheppard had to say, then he would immediately revert to his sullen behavior. He was jealous!

"What?" Sheppard stared at Mitchell incredulously.

"I'm telling you, John, I was watching the guy and he's got it bad."

"He spent all of...what...an hour total with her?"

"This is Logan we're talking about, John," he reminded him. "That doesn't really surprise you, does it?"

"Right. Well, I guess I shouldn't be that surprised," he admitted.

"Just thought you should know," Mitchell smiled.

"Yeah, thanks Cam... Hey, I'm going to pick up Chels from the nursery, you wanna come?"

"Sure!" he readily agreed.

As they rounded the corner and headed to the transporter, Sheppard was intercepted by a young Sergeant full of questions for him.

"Go ahead, Cam, I'll be there in a minute," he said motioning Mitchell on ahead of him.

Mitchell was surprised to find Bates lingering near the nursery when he arrived. The man was looking a bit dour and suspicious.

"Bates? What's up?" he asked.

"Just watching," he replied.

"Watching what? Or should I say who?" Mitchell looked in, following his gaze.

"That Athosian woman, Kerin. Everytime I come in here to pick up my kid, she's in there..."

"Isn't she one of the caretakers?" Mitchell asked.

"Yeah... Sort of... But she never really pays attention to the other kids... Not much anyway."

"What do you mean?" Mitchell's spidey-senses were immediately queued up.

"She's... She spends a lot of time with Sheppard's kid," he said.

"Oh? How much time?" Mitchell frowned. He knew the history there.

"More than she should...*I* think..." Bates sighed.

Mitchell eyed the woman rocking Chelsea. She sure did look like she adored the baby in her arms, something he completely understood, but... Bates was right. There was something *off* about her. Sheppard had told him about how, when he and Logan had been lost all those months, this woman had offered to "ease his pain and loneliness" he felt at losing his best friend. She'd virtually thrown herself at him, and Sheppard had had to tell her, in no uncertain terms, that he was already spoken for. Now, it appeared, she had decided to refocus her attention on Sheppard's child.

After a few moments, Mitchell strode confidently into the nursery, stopping briefly to greet some of the older children. Sam idolized Mitchell every bit as much as he idolized Sheppard, though he didn't see him as often. He executed a perfect salute, bringing a warm smile to Mitchell's face, who returned his salute crisply.

"SitRep, Space cowboy!" Mitchell ordered.

"Situation secure, sir!" Sam giggled.

"Excellent! Keep up the good work!" he saluted Sam again and headed for the Athosian woman rocking Chelsea.

"Good evening," he drawled.

The woman stiffened, but remained cordial. "Good evening Colonel Mitchell."

"I see you have my favorite girl there," he smiled.

"I was just about to feed her," she replied.

Mitchell checked his watch. "Isn't it a little early? She doesn't usually eat at this hour."

"She got a little off schedule today," the woman stammered.

"I see... Well, I'm actually here to pick her up, so you don't need to worry about feeding her," he said.

As expected, the woman bristled. "But I understood that her father would be picking her up today!" she protested.

"He was delayed," Mitchell explained.

"We aren't supposed to release the children without permission," she stammered.

"Am I to understand that you think I might be trying to abscond with this infant without her parents permission?"

"I just don't feel... comfortable... releasing her without... How long will Colonel Sheppard be delayed?"

Mitchell stared at her for a moment. "I'm really not sure, but in the meantime, you can hand me the baby and we'll be on our way."

"Maybe if I call Colonel Sheppard..." she trailed off stubbornly.

Exasperated, Mitchell keyed his mic. "Colonel Sheppard, come in."

"Sheppard here," came the reply.

"What is your ETA to the nursery?"

"I'm not sure... You don't mind picking her up for me, do you?"

"Not at all, not at all, but if you'd kindly inform the warden here that it's alright... we'll be on our way back to you."

"Warden? What? Yeah, you have my permission!" Sheppard replied.

Mitchell turned toward Kerin. "Satisfied?" he asked.

She nodded gloomily. "I... take my responsibilities very seriously."

"And it's admirable... Now, if you please?" he held out his arms for the baby.

After a moment's hesitation, she reluctantly placed Chelsea in his outstretched arms. Mitchell cuddled her close and looked around for her diaper bag. "Thank you...Do you have her bag?" he asked.

Kerin went into the other room and brought back her bag, dropping it on the floor at his feet.

"I hope she doesn't fuss... She's not too fond of strangers holding her," she said icily.

Mitchell was completely taken aback. "I'm hardly a stranger," he replied.

"She's not used to you anymore, Colonel."

He looked down at the smiling baby. "It appears you're mistaken about that. Goodnight, Ma'am."

He left the nursery feeling decidedly uneasy. Bates was right. She had a very unhealthy attachment to the baby. One he suspected had more to do with the baby's father than with the child herself. He made a point of bringing it to Sheppard's attention when they ran into each other a few minutes later.

"I'm telling you man, it was damned creepy," Mitchell said.

"Are you sure you're not overreacting?" Sheppard asked.

"I'm sure. Haven't you seen it? I mean hasn't she given you any indication that she hasn't completely given up on the idea of... you know... the two of you... together?"

"Not that I've noticed," he admitted.

"Then again, the only woman you ever see is Logan, so I guess that doesn't surprise me, but hey... I'm telling you, there's something not quite right there."

Sheppard nodded thoughtfully. "Okay, well, I'll pay closer attention tomorrow and see if I get the same sense you're getting."

"Good," Mitchell said.

"In the meantime...I was planning on taking the cadet here down to the mess... You wanna join us?"

"Sure thing!" Mitchell jumped at the chance to spend more time with her.

Sheppard beamed with pride as the people in the mess hall fussed and cooed over his daughter. He and Mitchell took turns holding her while the other ate and then took turns trying to feed her the new baby cereals they were starting her on. By the time they were finished, both Sheppard and Mitchell were in desperate need of a shower, as Chelsea seemed to have more fun flinging her food around than actually eating it. Still, both men were completely besotted with the child who, in their eyes, could do no wrong.

Sheppard invited Mitchell back to their quarters to continue playing with the baby, but Mitchell declined, citing his need to get back to his own base, report in and clean up. Sheppard and Chelsea walked him to the gate, and Mitchell warned him one last time about the Athosian woman, Kerin. Sheppard promised to monitor the situation and take whatever action necessary to ensure the security of his family. He took the baby for a brief walk on the pier and then went back to his quarters to clean them both up and wait for Logan to return.

This time he decided to take Logan's advice and simply bring Chelsea into the shower with him. It took a little more effort to learn to balance the squirming baby in his arm while trying to wash his own hair and body, but he managed to accomplish both, and Chelsea loved the feel of the shower spray against her skin. She gurgled and cooed the entire time, so he stayed in longer than normal, just to play with her in the water.

He'd been somewhat terrified, at first, when it came time for him to care for the baby on his own, he'd been so afraid he might somehow hurt her or do something wrong but, he'd really come to enjoy and treasure the time they shared together on their own. When they were done in the shower, he dried her off and dressed her in her pajamas then settled in the rocker with a bottle and began to tell her a bedtime story. Her eyes never left his face as he spoke softly to her, sometimes reaching up to touch his face, until her eyelids began to flutter sleepily. He kept talking to her, in lower and more hushed tones until he was sure she was fast asleep. He held her, cradled in his arms for a little while after that, just staring down at her perfect little features. It humbled him to know that this perfect little life had been entrusted to he and Logan. The love he felt for this child and her mother was the fiercest, most primal feeling he'd ever experienced.

ELSEWHERE IN THE CITY

"Colonel Devane?"

Logan stopped and turned around to find Gere walking towards her.

"Gere, how are you?"

"I am well, thank you; and you?"

"Very well, a little tired, but well. What can I do for you?"

"I was wondering... are you familiar with the planet your people have designated P5W-971?" he asked.

"Yes, very... My team was the one who went in, initially, to check it out," she informed him.

"Ah... and do you think it a suitable planet for our needs?"

Logan thought for a moment. "Actually, I think it would be perfect. There is already an existing infrastructure, that should make things much easier in the beginning. Good location, lots of room to grow. I think it's probably the best option out there for you. Didn't John go over all this with you?"

"I might have missed some of the discussion. At any rate, I do trust your opinion," he nodded.

"Oh, well, thanks for the vote of confidence. Is there anything else you needed?" she asked.

"No, thank you. I'll let you get back to your duties."

"I'm off-duty now. Haven't seen my daughter for hours and I'm getting a bit antsy."

"Is she still in the nursery?" he asked.

"No, no, she's with my husband."

He managed to hide the sour look at the mention of her husband. "Well then, I certainly don't want to hold you up. Goodnight Colonel Devane."

"Goodnight Gere... And uh, Gere?"

"Yes?"

"When I'm off duty, my friends call me Logan," she told him.

He smiled broadly at that. "Thank you for including me in that group. Goodnight Logan."

She turned and walked down the hall at a brisk pace. Gere watched her go, a look of longing in his eyes. When she had disappeared from view, he silently berated himself for his foolishness. The woman was unavailable. Completely unavailable. Yet, he could not seem to help himself. Try as he might, he could never seem to put her out of his mind for very long. Years ago, he'd sworn to his dearest friend, Narim, that he would not allow himself to suffer the same fate as Narim: To fall in love with a woman so completely out of his reach. Narim had warned him then, that the heart wanted what it wanted, and sometimes one had no control over who it was that won his heart. Such was the case with Narim and his love for Samantha Carter.

Gere wondered to himself if it was something about Earth women that captivated his kind in such a way, or if it really was as random as Narim had said. Either way, Gere knew he was doomed to the same fate. Tollans were very monogamous. Almost obsessively so. With no effort whatsoever, Logan Devane had captured his heart, and she didn't even know it. He wondered if Narim had ever discussed the Tollan ways of love with Samantha Carter. If he'd told her that the Tollans, once falling in love with someone, they fell for life. Had he lived, Narim was doomed never to share his life with any woman, save it be Samantha Carter. He understood now, the pain and longing Narim had suffered all that time, for he too, was now suffering the same agony.


	46. Chapter 46

For several weeks, the Lanteans went about helping the Tollans establish their new colony. They helped with construction and setting up shields, and planting crops for food. The Tollans were certainly more gracious and accepting of their help than they had been previously, probably because they'd very nearly been wiped out of existence.

Tarik, at least, was more amenable to establishing relations than his predecessors had been. He'd recognized long ago how helpful the Earthlings had been to the Tollans, how they had, in fact, saved their people several times, only to be rewarded by the Tollan governments' betrayal. The Earthlings had proven themselves over and over again, and were most deserving of their trust. This was not to say, however, that they would be sharing their most 'dangerous' technology with the humans, but as far as he was concerned, there was no reason not to share 'some' weapons technology. The Tollan Ion cannons had ultimately proved useless against the Goa'uld, but they might just be of use against the Wraith.

These things, in particular, he'd discussed at length with Elizabeth Weir and General Caldwell. The Tollans would, of course, stipulate that these weapons were to be used only in defense of the Pegasus Galaxy, not Earth. There was still too big of a risk that the technology could be abused and turned against the people of their own world. Weir agreed with this assessment and offered no resistance to the stipulation. In fact, there were a great many things Tarik and Weir agreed upon. Tarik felt as though, in Weir, he'd found a kindred spirit.

As for Gere, he wasn't sure whether to be disappointed or relieved by the fact that Logan Devane was not involved in negotiations between the Lanteans and Tollans. Her role as Head of Security for Atlantis did not call for her to play a part in negotiations. He suposed he should be grateful that he wouldn't be tortured by her constant presence in those meetings, but he longed just to be near her. Yet, when he found any odd excuse to visit Atlantis, he was often pained to find her with her husband nearby. Logic told him he had no one to blame but himself, for it was he who chose to seek her out, but he found himself blaming and resenting John Sheppard more and more, irrational as it might be.

As fate would have it, he was given the opportunity one day to intervene on her behalf with one of the female caretakers in the nursery. He'd seen Logan tiptoe into the nursery and followed her. Logan appeared to be having a bit of a disagreement with the woman, who apparently objected to Logan sneaking in to peek at her own daughter while she was napping.

"But if you happen to wake her, it will throw off her schedule," the woman said.

Logan stared incredulously at her. "Isn't that for ME to worry about, Kerin?"

"Yes, of course, Colonel, but you are not the one who..."

"Do NOT finish that sentence!" Logan warned.

"My dear woman, am I mistaken or are you actually refusing to let Colonel Devane visit with her own child?" Gere asked, his tone decidedly icy.

"No...of course not!" she protested.

"Then kindly step out of the way, please?" he stepped between Logan and the woman called Kerin.

Kerin haughtily stepped aside and Logan dashed to her child's crib. Gently picking up the baby, Logan held her close, cradling her against her chest securely. She then reached down and grabbed a cloth bag and made her way back to where he stood.

"Colonel Sheppard and I will be taking her for the rest of the day, Kerin." She strode out of the room without looking back.

Gere studied Kerin's face thoughtfully, a mask of barely controlled fury. He wondered why she held Logan in such contempt. "Whatever your feelings are, madame, I strongly suggest you don't consider ever crossing Colonel Devane," he warned her and then strode out of the room.

Caldwell looked at her curiously as Logan passed his office on the way to her own, carrying Chelsea in her arms. "Colonel?" he called out.

"Yes sir?" she stopped and stepped back into the doorway of his office.

"The nursery's not closed, is it?" he asked before noting the thunderous expression on her face.

"No sir..." She stepped inside and closed the door behind her. "May I speak with you, sir?"

"Of course."

"I... You know I have the utmost trust in Lyta and Kitah for that matter, but... do you... what is your impression about Kerin?"

Caldwell studied her face for a moment. He wondered if she'd heard the rumors floating around about Kerin's crush on Sheppard, but he saw no trace of jealousy there. "I don't know her that well, Logan."

"Oh..." she trailed off, her brows knit in concern.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"I'm not sure... I just got a weird vibe... coming off of her..." she shook her head.

"What do you mean?"

"I went down there to steal a peek at Chels and she... Steve, it was like she was trying to keep me away from my own child!"

"What?" he asked incredulously.

"I don't... It was weird, you know... She was actually standing in my way, as if she were guarding the door, and she was spouting off about not interrupting Chelsea's schedule and such... I thought maybe I might have been overreacting but..."

"You don't typically do that," he pointed out.

"Yeah... I know. I wanted to ask Lyta about her but she's not in your quarters."

"She went to the mainland for a visit. What about Kitah?" he wondered as he came around his desk to take Chelsea from her arms.

"They must have gone together. I... Steve, I know I'm still on duty but, I couldn't leave her there with Kerin..."

"Don't worry about it. It's been pretty quiet around here. John should be back soon..." he sing-songed for Chelsea's benefit. "Take off early, Logan. It's fine."

"Are you sure? I wouldn't ask but..."

He held up a hand to stop her. "Hey, I get it. I'm a parent, too."

"Do you think I'm being paranoid?" she asked, somewhat embarrassed.

"Not at all. Trust your gut, I always have."

She smiled up at him gratefully. "Thanks."

"Logan, there is something you should know, and apparently no one else has seen fit to tell you," he grimaced. He was loathe to start trouble, but she did have a right to know.

"What's that?" she arched an eyebrow at him warily.

"Sheppard's probably not even aware of it, since you are the only woman he ever has eyes for, but this woman... Kerin... I believe she does have a bit of a crush on John," he told her.

"A crush?"

"For lack of a better word," he shrugged.

"I thought it was just me but... She has tried to catch his eye before... Before we were together, I mean. She's one of the reasons I finally told him how I really felt about him."

"They never dated... did they?" he stared at her.

"NO! No, never, but not for lack of effort on her part," she assured him.

He nodded. "Follow your gut, Lo. If something feels off about her then we'll keep her out of the nursery."

"Thank you, Steve, really, thank you," she stood on her tiptoes and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

"I'll talk to Lyta when she gets home and find out if she's noticed anything off about her too," he assured her and planted a tender kiss on Chelsea's downy soft head. "I can't get over how much she looks like John... Only prettier!" he teased.

"I don't see why not, Sammy looks more and more like you every day!" Logan countered.

ONE HOUR LATER

"She _what_?!" Sheppard barked angrily.

"I thought maybe I was just being paranoid, but other people have seen it too," Logan sighed.

"Yeah, Cam said something about it the other day, but that was just her not wanting to let HIM take her..."

"What?!" she squawked, cutting him off.

"I didn't have a chance to tell you," he admitted sheepishly.

"Why not?" she demanded.

Now he really looked sheepish. "We were...uh...busy...with other things."

"John..."

"Are you complaining?" he leered.

"No... I... _Stop_ that!" she stammered. "What did she do to Cameron?"

"Nothing really... Just gave him a hard time about picking up the cadet," he shrugged. "Mitchell said it was more about the vibe she gave off than anything she actually did."

"Yeah... I got that vibe. John, I don't want her taking care of Chels anymore."

"I don't either," he agreed. "The thing with Cam can be explained...sort of...but her giving YOU a hard time? There's no excuse for that!"

"She's still carrying a torch for you," she told him.

"That's what Cam said," he admitted.

"He's right," she told him.

"Yeah well, maybe I should have known," he sighed.

"Why do you say that?" she asked.

"Something that happened when you and Mitchell were... gone..." he trailed off uncomfortably. He hated thinking about that dark time in their lives.

"What did she do?" Logan asked through gritted teeth.

"She just tried to... make me *feel* better..." he muttered, going a little red in the face.

"And how did she do that?" Logan's eyes flashed angrily.

"Keep in mind that no one knew about us at the time... Just that we were very close..." he shook his head.

"Uh-huh..."

"When I got back to my quarters one night, she was... waiting for me there."

"Waiting for you... And?" she prodded.

"She thought that it would help ease my pain if she... offered... herself to me..." he stammered awkwardly, now fully beet-red..

"Offered herself to you... like on a platter?" she snarked.

"More like on my bed..." he admitted.

"I see," she seethed. "And she was dressed...how?"

"Uh...actually she wasn't..." he swallowed around the hard lump forming in his throat.

"So she threw herself at you... NAKED?!" she demanded hotly.

"Uh...yeah..." he nodded.

"That little bi..."

Sheppard held up a hand to cut her off. "I swear honey, I kept my eyes averted the whole time!"

"Once you saw she was naked, you mean?"

"Well, yeah... I mean I was surprised to find her there, in my room and when I saw that she was... you know..."

"NAKED?"

"Yeah...I just turned around. I saw her clothes sitting on a chair, so I kind of tossed them over my shoulder at her and told her to get dressed."

"Did she?"

"Not at first..." he admitted.

"What did she do?"

"She tried talking me into...you know...But I made it clear that I was already spoken for and was not the least bit interested in what she was offering."

"So she gave up?"

"I DID have to tell her a few times, but yeah...she eventually gave up."

"Apparently she hasn't given up completely," Logan snorted.

"Come on, Sparky...You're not really jealous, are you? Of _her_?"

"Jealous? No! Furious? YES!" she snapped.

"Logan..." He stopped at the expression on her face.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she stared into his eyes.

"It wasn't important... I never even gave it another thought after that... Not until Mitchell told me what happened in the nursery."

Logan glared angrily up at him. "She's had a thing for you... all this time...John..." she shook her head and walked away.

"Nothing happened...It wasn't important..."

"She's been watching our daughter, John. Touching her... holding her..." She felt sick just thinking about it.

"She hasn't done anything, up to now, and she won't get the chance, even if she wanted to. Are you really THAT upset that I didn't tell you?"

"Yes!" she snapped again.

"Logan... Come on! It's not like we tell each other every teeny-tiny, little mundane thing!" he reminded her.

"She was naked in your bed! OUR bed, to be more precise... She's in _love_ with you, John, probably OBSESSED... You think that isn't something you should share with me?!"

"I didn't think it was that serious! Besides... Have YOU told ME everything that went on between you and Mitchell while you were gone?"

Logan wheeled on him. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," he mumbled, instantly regretting it.

"No... It's not 'nothing.' You've obviously been holding onto something for a while now, so get it out now," she told him.

"There's no point... Forget I said anything."

"How am I supposed to do that? Say what's on your mind, John."

"Nothing," he insisted.

"Don't lie to ME, I know you too well... You're not actually wondering..." she paused to look into his eyes.

"What?" he asked defensively.

"You don't honestly believe that Cameron and I..."

"What?!"

"Do you think that we... had sex?" she gasped, disbelief warring with anger.

"No!" he shouted.

"John..."

"Look... Okay... I admit, it bothered me for a while. I know you two never actually...did...anything... But yeah, I noticed there was only one bed in that cozy little cabin the two of you built. I know you had to pose as husband and wife so the villagers wouldn't kill you, but yeah! It BOTHERED me. I know damn well how Cam feels about you, and how hard it had to be for him, sleeping in the same bed with you, breathing in your scent night after night, and having to keep himself from reaching out and touching you..."

"He's our FRIEND!" she reminded him.

"I KNOW! But do you know... do you have any idea how many times, once you got back, you'd wake up in the middle of the night and call out to him?!" he croaked.

Logan felt like she'd just been kicked in the gut. "Yes... I do... I also know that YOU are the one I called out to FIRST. For a long time, I was afraid that our rescue was just a dream... or wishful thinking. It took me a while to really believe that we were home to stay."

Sheppard deflated a bit. "I know..."

"I thought you got past all that and that you and Cam were back on track. I thought you trusted him."

"I did...I do... And we are," he assured her.

"It doesn't sound like you've gotten past it, and it doesn't sound like you trust him... or _me_."

"That's not true! You KNOW I trust you, there's never been any question about that!" he shouted defensively.

"Then how can you think I would..."

"I DON'T!"

"But the time we had together... when we were stranded... It still bothers you."

"Of course it bothers me! I wouldn't be human if it didn't bother me! I wasn't there for you when you needed me most. He was. He took care of you. He delivered our child. He raised her for the first two weeks of her life. The three of you were a FAMILY! Yes... It bothers me!"

"So you resent... us," she murmured sadly.

"NO! Not you, Sparks, not Mitchell. I envy the _time_ he had with you, I envy that he was able to share your pregnancy with you, that he was there for Chelsea's first breath, her first cries, her first feeding. I envy that HIS was the first voice she knew and focused on as a... father... But I don't resent _him_. I resent the Genii who sent you guys there in the first place - the ones who made all that possible."

"Then why..." she shook her head.

He shrugged, knowing already what she was asking. "Just a stupid way of pointing out that we aren't privy to every detail about what goes on when we're out of each others' presence. Stupid, I know."

"I love you, John. I would never..."

"I know that, Sparks, and I love you, too... So much..." he reached out and took her face in his hands. "I'm sorry I hurt you."

Logan threw her arms around his neck and pulled him close. "I love you," she murmured before covering his mouth with her own.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"Just...PLEASE, don't let her anywhere near our daughter," Sheppard asked.

Kitah smiled reassuringly at both of them. "Do not worry. I understand your concern and I agree with your decision. Her behavior was beginning to concern me, as well."

"Thank you," Logan smiled. "If she tries to force the issue, will you call one of us?"

"Certainly," she promised.

As they took their leave and headed down the hallway, Logan looked apprehensively back over her shoulder.

"She'll be fine, sweetie," Sheppard assured her.

"I know... I know... I just..." she trailed off with a shrug.

"Breathe," he ordered, stopping to take her hands in his as he made her look up at him. "We're both here today. If Kerin tries anything, or gets out of line in any way, we're here to deal with it. Daniel is here today and Bates, from what I understand has been keeping an eye on her, too."

"You think I'm being silly?" she asked.

"No...I think you're acting like a concerned mother," he replied.

"Alright..."

He looked up and down the hallway to make sure it was clear. "Now... Give Daddy a kiss before someone comes."

Logan eagerly threw her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately. By the time she pulled back, Sheppard was shaken and more than a little aroused. "Damn, Sparks..." he croaked.

"A little something to keep you going for the day," she chuckled.

"Keep me going? More like keep me in pain..." he groaned.

"If you're lucky, maybe we'll get to meet for lunch..." she teased.

"If I can hold out that long..." he moved to take her in his arms again, but she wriggled just out of his reach and backed down the hallway.

"Gonna be late..." she sing-songed. "Love you babe!" she called out and then jogged down the hall toward the transporter and out of his line of vision.

Sheppard stood there, willing his body to cool down. All this time, and she could still make him as randy as a teenager with one kiss! God, he loved that woman!

As she arrived for her morning briefing, Logan walked into the conference room and into what was clearly a very intense, private moment between Weir and Tarik. They weren't *doing* anything, but it was obvious that they'd been in the middle of an intimate conversation.

"Sorry," she winced. "I can come back," she took a few steps backward.

"No, Logan, it's all right. Please come in," Weir smiled.

"O-kay..." Logan murmured.

"It is good to see you again, Colonel. It has been a while."

Logan smiled up at Tarik. He was a good match for Weir. She had to admit that she'd never seen Weir looking so happy before.

"It is good to see you, too, Tarik. How are things going on Tollana?"

"Very well. Thanks to all the help we have received from your people, my people are ready to move in permanently."

"That's great!" Logan smiled.

"Yes. My people are very pleased."

"So what brings you to Atlantis?" Logan asked, as if she didn't know.

"Aside from the opportunity to see...(looking at Weir) a few people here, I have come to discuss the building and placement of a Tollan Ion Cannon on Lantea."

"Fabulous!" Logan exclaimed.

"The Tollans will, of course, construct the weapon, but once it is complete, we will transfer it here."

"Thank you, Tarik. Your trust in us means so much."

"It is the least we could do," he smiled down at her.

"We deeply appreciate it, too. With our shields and cloaking capabilities, and our cover remarkably still intact, we haven't needed to utilize the city's defenses, such as they are, but it is nice to know we HAVE them, should our cover eventually be blown."

"Indeed. I must say, the cloak and shielding technology you have given us for Tollana are incredibly effective. Hopefully, we will be as lucky as you have been in avoiding detection by the Wraith."

"I hope so, too."

Bates came in to join the briefing, followed by Caldwell and Sheppard, who leered momentarily at Logan before taking his seat. Once McKay and Beckett appeared, they were able to begin the briefing.

THREE MONTHS LATER

Logan stood in the tower and watched as, in the distance, the Tollans worked on installing the Ion Cannon they'd constructed for the Lanteans. O'Neill and Daniel had been non-plussed when the Tollans first offered it to them, and hadn't really believed they would get it until they actually saw it in place on Atlantis. O'Neill had gated in from Earth to watch the installation for himself.

Given his past experience with the Tollan government, he was still somewhat skeptical about their sudden willingness to share this technology with the people from Earth. But even he had to admit, upon meeting and talking with Tarik, that they genuinely seemed sincere in their desire to strike up a more balanced alliance than the previous government had.

Caldwell came in behind her and stood next to her at the window.

"How's it going?"

"So far, so good," she said cheerily.

"I guess I don't need to tell you how excited O'Neill is about..."

"Us having a big-honking space gun?" she finished for him.

Caldwell laughed. "It IS pretty cool," he said.

"Yeah, it is." she grinned.

"Any problems with that Athosian woman, Kerin, lately?" he asked.

Logan's face clouded over for a moment. "No..." she murmured.

"That's good."

"Yeah... I just... I dunno Steve... I honestly didn't think she'd cave so easily," she admitted.

"You WANTED a fight?" he teased.

"Oh no! God, no... I just... I can't let go of the feeling that she's up to something."

"If she is, she won't be able to carry it off. The kids are closely monitored. Lyta says she hasn't even shown her face since the day they told her, three months ago, that her services were no longer required. Still, no one is letting down their guard."

"Good to know!" she chirped.

"So... When are you going to share the big news?" he asked.

Logan gawked up at him in dismay. "Big news?"

"Come on Logan, we go back a long way, right?" he grinned at her.

She nodded mutely.

"And I've already been through this twice, myself, though not from the same perspective, but... I know you and I know the signs well enough to recognize it when I see it."

And, he thought to himself, he knew from firsthand experience how... compelling... Logan could be, and that there was no way Sheppard could practice restraint or always take precautions in the face of such constant temptation.

"Steve, I..."

"You're pregnant again, aren't you?" he said.

She couldn't help the smile that crept over her face. "I, uh... Well... Yes," she stammered.

"Congratulations," he hugged her gently.

"We... uh... were waiting to get past the first trimester before we told anyone... You know, just in case."

"I understand. How far along are you now?"

She blushed prettily. "Three months exactly..."

She smiled thinking back to that night three months before. What had started out as a full-blown fight, had ended in passionate lovemaking and the unintentional, but welcome, conception of their second child. They hadn't planned on having another child so soon, Chelsea was only six months old at the time, but they weren't at all unhappy about it.

"I'm really happy for you," Caldwell said.

"Thank you," she said, hugging him again.

"And don't worry, I won't say a word," he promised.

"We were about to break the news anyway... It's alright if you tell Lyta."

"Okay, Lyta only," he nodded.

The door opened and they turned to find Gere standing there.

"Gere," Logan called out. "Nice to see you again."

"And you, Colonel Devane," he replied, eyeing Caldwell suspiciously.

Caldwell had been standing just a little too close to Logan for his comfort, and he wondered what he had just walked in on. He'd been sure that he was not the only man to fall for Logan's charm and beauty, but he had not expected Caldwell to be one of them.

"Gere, you remember General Caldwell?"

"Yes, of course," he said somewhat stiffly.

"Good to see you again. I better be getting back to the control room. Colonel, Gere," he nodded perfunctorily and swept out of the room, leaving them alone.

"I did not mean to interrupt," Gere said.

"Not at all! We were just watching your progress on the Ion Cannon. Very impressive, by the way," she smiled happily.

"Ah," was all he could manage in the face of that smile. Her smile always made him feel like his knees were on the verge of buckling. By the time he was ready to speak again, the opportunity was lost. Mitchell came striding into the room and interrupted them.

"Hey there gorgeous..." he cut himself short as he caught sight of Gere with her. "Er... Colonel Devane... I was just looking for (looking at Gere) your _husband_ ," he said, careful to put the emphasis on the word "husband" for Gere's benefit.

Sure enough, his intent netted the reaction he'd expected. Gere favored him with a sour glance before turning back to look out the window. Logan looked at Mitchell suspiciously for a moment. She hadn't missed his emphasis on that word any more than Gere had, but she didn't understand why he would do that.

"He's...uh... down at the construction site with General O'Neill," she informed him.

"Ah!" Mitchell grinned. "Why don't you walk me down there?" he asked.

"You don't know the way?" she asked, only slightly teasing.

"I will take him," Gere offered suddenly.

"Okay. I'm expecting a call soon anyway. Colonel Mitchell, you're in capable hands."

Gere started to lead him out of the room, but Logan pulled Mitchell aside long enough to whisper "BEHAVE!" in his ear. Mitchell smiled down at her with an innocent look on his face, then followed Gere outside.

As they entered the transporter, Mitchell glanced down at Gere and did exactly what he knew Logan would hate. "You are aware of how devoted she is to her husband, right?"

Gere stiffened and did not look up. "I am well aware of Colonel Devane's marital status, Colonel Mitchell."

"Good," he replied, and left it at that.

O'Neill and all the senior staff, as well as the Tollans shared a celebratory dinner that evening. The mood was joyous, and the food was delicious. Logan had informed Sheppard that Caldwell had guessed their secret, so they decided to share the news with everyone in attendance. Logan sat back, more than happy to let Sheppad make the announcement.

He stood up and tapped his spoon against the side of his wine glass. "May I have your attention please?" he asked.

All eyes turned toward him, expecting that he was about to make a toast.

"This was just going to be a simple announcement, but I think I will make a toast, if you'll all join me?" he said.

Turning to Logan, who was now blushing furiously, he began:

"I'd like to propose a toast, to my unbelievably beautiful wife, Logan. Who not only puts up with me, happily for some reason, but has given me an equally beautiful child, AND who is now about to honor me even more with another child... To Logan!" he raised his glass.

"Logan!" everyone called out and took a drink before pandemonium broke out.

"You're pregnant?!" Weir exclaimed.

"Again?" said McKay.

There were well wishes all the way around and O'Neill even came over and hugged her. Sheppard had pulled Mitchell aside earlier and told him the news in private. The only one in attendance who was not wearing a happy smile was Gere. He plastered as much of a smile on his face as he could muster, but it wasn't genuine.

Dinner was followed up by music and dancing, though O'Neill had to call it an early night, since he was due back on Earth for a meeting in Washington. He sought them out before he left and congratulated both of them again, then pulled Sheppard aside and whispered some crack about giving his poor wife a break between this baby and the next.

Logan was tired but happy as she danced the night away with her friends and colleagues. Throughout it all, Gere watched from the sidelines, utterly miserable. His mind knew that he could never have her, but his heart wanted her all the same. He wasn't aware of it, but Mitchell and then Bates kept an eye on him as he watched Logan longingly from across the room.

"You seeing this?" Bates asked Mitchell.

"Yeah... I've seen the way he looks at her."

"Something we should warn the Colonel about?" Bates went on.

"Sheppard or Devane?" Mitchell asked.

"Well, uh... I meant Colonel Sheppard but maybe we should warn Colonel Devane, too," Bates nodded.

Mitchell thought about it for a moment. "She won't believe it... but Sheppard will. Of course he'll probably beat the guy to a pulp, but..."

"Not good for interplanetary relations, eh?" Bates snorted. He could picture Sheppard doing that very thing, if suitably provoked.

"I mentioned it to him once before, but he didn't seem to think it was anything to worry about," Mitchell told him.

"He's probably used to men drooling over his wife," Bates chuckled.

"He should be... Remember, they grew up together... He's been watching guys hit on her since they were kids," Mitchell reminded him. "What about that Athosian woman, Kerin? Have you seen her around lately?"

"No sir. She's made herself pretty scarce since she was ejected from the nursery."

"Let's hope that's a permanent development," Mitchell grunted.

"I'll keep an eye on her, sir," Bates promised.

"Good man, Bates. It's not that she can't handle herself or anything, but now... in her condition..." he trailed off meaningfully.


	47. Chapter 47

The next three months passed uneventfully, and Logan's pregnancy was progressing normally. As had been the case with Chelsea, Logan's pregnancy was hardly noticeable at six months, unless you looked directly at the tiny protuberance of her tummy. She and Bates had been having lunch together in the mess hall, when he suggested a visit to the nursery. Logan was always amenable to visiting her daughter, who at twelve months old now, was a VERY active toddler. She'd found her feet two months before, and now she was toddling all over the place, keeping both her and Sheppard very busy.

Young Hope was extremely helpful while Chelsea was in the nursery. She kept a close eye, still, on the Jackson, Caldwell and Sheppard babies, who apparently had a knack for going in three different directions all at once. Bates' own son, now almost four, had formed a fast friendship with Sam Caldwell and the two were nearly inseparable, unless one of their favorite soldiers were around, then they had eyes only for their heroes.

As they neared the nursery, Logan was surprised that she couldn't see any of the adults through the windows in the hall. She almost always saw a number of women up and running around after the children.

"Odd..." she murmured.

"What?" Bates asked.

"There are no..."

Her sentence was cut off by a sudden flash of light coming from the nursery door. Logan pressed herself flat against the wall and drew her zat. Bates was on the floor, unable to move as the result of a direct hit from a stunner.

"Go away!" a female voice shouted from within the room.

"Kerin!" Logan muttered to herself. She'd known the woman's absence had been too good to be true.

"That's not gonna happen, Kerin!" she called out.

Logan keyed her mic and called quietly for backup. Ordinarily, Logan would have no problem whatsoever with taking the woman down, physically, if necessary, but she didn't want to risk the baby she was carrying getting hit by a wraith stunner. Not to mention the fact that Kerin was, in all likelihood, holding her daughter.

"What do you think you're doing, Kerin?" she asked, trying to keep her tone as even as possible.

"I just wanted to see her... hold her... No one would let me in... She's grown so much..." she trailed off absently.

"Yes she has. Now you've seen her, Kerin, so just put her down and walk away."

"I...can't... (her voice changed suddenly) You don't deserve her, Colonel...or John... You don't deserve either of them!"

Logan rolled her eyes. 'Great!' she thought. Now the woman had become psychotic. "And why is that?" She had to keep her talking, at least until backup arrived.

"You... you went away... when you were supposed to be married... You went away with that Colonel Mitchell! You left him and took up with another man. You don't love John... He may believe that nothing happened between you, but I know better!"

"What is it you think you know?" Logan asked.

"You gave yourself to Colonel Mitchell!"

"No I didn't," she argued calmly.

Of course Kerin was the first or only person who believed that. She'd heard some of the rumors and had seen the judgment in gaze of some people around the city. She never let it bother her, because she knew the truth, and so did the people she knew and cared about most. Really, all one had to do was look at Chelsea and Sheppard to know that he was, in fact, her father and not Mitchell (as some of the rumors purported.)

"I can see through your lies, Colonel... I saw the way you looked at him before..."

"You mean when I had amnesia?"

"I don't understand your words, but it doesn't matter! They are ALL LIES!" Kerin cried. "This baby should be mine! And she will be! And John will leave you so we can be a family!"

"Well, that's not gonna happen," she told her as calmly as she could under the circumstances.

Kerin appeared in the doorway holding Chelsea in front of her, as she suspected she would. Upon catching sight of Logan, Chelsea began to babble and kick her feet excitedly.

"Mama!" she said, reaching out a small hand towards her.

"You see? She knows who I am!" Kerin cried victoriously.

"She was talking to me, you FRUITCAKE!" Logan said through clenched teeth.

"Mama," Chelsea repeated.

"Hi sweetie, just a minute, okay?" she spared her daughter a smile and a nod of reassurance.

"Mama!"

"Back away!" Kerin ordered.

"No Kerin. I won't do that."

"I WILL shoot you," she warned.

"I'm sure you'll try, but there is NO way I'm letting you leave here with my daughter."

"My daughter!" she screamed. "Mine! Do you hear me?! My baby! Mine and John's!"

Chelsea looked at the woman with wide, surprised eyes. Her little brow furrowed and she looked back at her mother for reassurance.

"Put her down and you can go," Logan said.

"She comes with me!"

"Not gonna happen..." Logan shook her head slowly as, at the other end of the hall, she finally saw signs of her backup. In her ear, she could hear Mitchell's voice coming over the radio.

"Logan...easy... She won't get away," he assured her.

She didn't have time to wonder what Mitchell was doing there, she was just glad that he was. "Put her down," Logan ordered again.

"NO!"

Chelsea began to cry, which only enraged Logan. "Put her down, now... You're scaring her!"

Chelsea was crying in earnest, reaching her arms out for Logan. "Mama, mama, mama!" She began twisting her little body around in Kerin's arms and kicking her feet. As she twisted around, she caught sight of Mitchell inching his way silently down the hall towards them. As soon as she saw him, she let out a squeal and tried to reach out to him. "Cammin!" she cried.

Kerin whirled around and pointed the stunner at him, causing him to stop dead in his tracks, arms raised.

"Take it easy, Kerin, no one's gonna hurt you," he said calmly.

"Liar!" she screamed.

Chelsea was now alternating between calling out to Logan and to Mitchell. All she knew was that she didn't want to be where she was.

"Chelsea, baby... Calm down for Mama, now, okay?"

Kerin snapped. "I told you... _I_ am her Mama!" she shrieked and pointed the stunner at Logan.

Logan had no cover to shield herself behind, standing out in the open hallway as she was. She couldn't fire at Kerin with her zat because Chelsea would be caught in the blast. All she could do was stand there and watch as Kerin's finger began to pull on the trigger. It felt like things were moving in slow motion as she focused on that trigger finger. Logan placed her arms protectively over her abdomen and tried to turn away, hoping that would give the baby at least some measure of protection from the stunner blast. As Kerin pulled the trigger, Mitchell launched himself between the two women just as the stunner fired. He caught the blast on his left side just before it would have hit Logan. He went down hard and lay there, unable to move, facing away from them.

Logan took advantage of Kerin's momentary distraction at missing her intended target and lunged toward her. She ripped Chelsea from Kerin's grasp easily enough, but that brought the woman's focus right back to her.

"NO!" she screamed, aiming the stunner at her again.

Logan placed Chelsea down on the floor against Mitchell's side and draped his limp arm protectively over her little body. Mitchell's eyes were open, but he was completely helpless to do anything to stop Kerin. As Logan turned to face her again, she was already pulling the trigger.

Suddenly, a shot rang out from down the hall as Logan dove out of the way. She looked up and saw Kerin looking past her with a stunned expression on her face. The stunner fell from her grasp, then she fell to her knees and finally slumped over, face down and didn't move.

Sheppard was by her side in an instant. Taking her in his arms, he pulled her onto his lap. "Logan...baby... are you okay?"

She stared up at him for a moment before answering. "I...yes..."

"Are you sure?" his voice was strained, and he looked on the verge of tears.

"I'm okay," she said.

Lorne was already moving the limp form of Kerin out of the way and into another room. Sheppard looked over at Mitchell, who was watching them with relief in his eyes. Chelsea was still crying, though less so now. She looked up at Shepaprd with wide eyes and then held out her arms.

"Dada?"

"Com'ere sweet pea," he held out his free hand to her.

She untangled herself from Mitchell's arm and toddled over to her parents. Sheppard held them both in his arms, rocking and soothing them. Logan clung to Chelsea desperately, tears streaming down her face. Beckett appeared with a few nurses to take care of the fallen nursery workers. He approached her first, but she waved him off in Mitchell's direction. Sheppard stood, lifting both Logan and Chelsea in his arms.

"John...what..."

"I'm taking you to the infirmary," he announced loud enough for Beckett to hear.

"I'll be along shortly," Beckett called out.

Sheppard started to walk away, stopped, then turned back to stand over Mitchell, who was being loaded onto a stretcher. He looked him right in the eye and smiled gratefully.

"Thank you," he whispered.

Mitchell blinked and then Sheppard walked away, his family cradled in his arms.

Logan lay very still while Sheppard held her hand through the ultrasound procedure Beckett was performing. Chelsea was wedged between herself and Sheppard, as neither of them were ready to let her out of their sight. Sheppard was pointing at the screen, trying to show Chelsea her baby brother or sister.

"The baby's fine, luv," Beckett assured her. "Maybe a wee bit put off by the gymnastics demonstration earlier, but unharmed."

Logan smiled gratefully over at Beckett. "Thank you Carson."

"Tak u," Chelsea mimed without looking up.

Beckett patted her head and then held out his arms for her. "I think the wee princess is a bit hungry, you two... I'll just take her for a bit - I promise you, she'll be fine," he added when they looked like they were about to protest. "We'll take good care of her."

Sheppard finally nodded, hugging his daughter tightly. "Be good for Uncle Carson, sweet-pea. Give Mama a kiss," he instructed.

Chelsea leaned down and planted a wet, sloppy kiss on Logan's cheek then went willingly into Beckett's arms. They waved goodbye and Beckett closed the door behind him. Logan immediately dissolved into tears and buried her face against Sheppard's chest. His eyes were tearing up as well as he held her snugly against him. He'd come so close to losing his entire family. Too close. There were those who would probably call him a cold-hearted #######, but he didn't particularly care that Kerin was dead.

Yes, she was deluded, and very likely psychotic, but she'd damned near destroyed his family. Beckett had confirmed that a hit from the stunner weapon would likely have killed his unborn baby, or at minimum, would have rendered the child a vegetable. The fetus simply could not have handled the disruption to their developing systems that a stunner would deliver. A stunner blast could also have dislodged her placenta causing Logan to hemorrhage and possibly bleed to death. Under the circumstances, shooting her had been the only way to save Logan and the baby. Kerin would have taken Chelsea, had she escaped, and possibly have killed her too. No. Sheppard had done the only thing he could do, and he didn't regret it.

"She can't hurt us ever again," Sheppard murmured to her.

Logan looked up at him tearfully. "Is she dead?"

He nodded solemnly. "Yeah, she is."

"She would have killed us, if she could...I...I..." she shook her head, unable to finish that thought.

"Well, she didn't...And we're all fine now."

"Cameron?" she asked.

"He's...uh...sleeping it off, but he's fine."

"You know that he... he took that stunner blast to save us..." she said, rubbing a hand over her barely protruding belly.

Sheppard put his hand on her belly next to hers. "I know."

"Lyta? Kitah? The others?"

"They're all sleeping it off, and they're all fine."

She nodded. "Good."

"You need to sleep, too."

"John..."

"No! Now you heard Beckett. Everything is fine with you and the baby, but he doesn't want you up and running around for another twelve hours, just as a precaution. You had a hell of a scare and your adrenaline levels were way up. So you keep that fine ass of yours in bed until Beckett clears you."

She opened her mouth to argue, but knew better when she saw the look on his face. "Can I lay down in OUR quarters instead of here?"

"Much as I'd like that, NO!" he shook his head firmly.

"What's the dif..."

"The difference is that Beckett had all the gizmo's and gadgets to monitor both you and the baby, and IF something goes wrong, you're already here where you can get treated right away."

"Alright," she caved.

"I love you, Sparks..." he whispered, burying his face in her hair.

"I love you too, Flyboy..."

There was a knock at the door and then Caldwell entered, concern etched all over his face. "Logan... Are you okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," she assured him.

He arched a skeptical eyebrow at her. "Sheppard?"

"She is, so are Chelsea and the baby. We all just got a bit...scared...there for a while. Logan's going to stay overnight, just as a precaution."

"How's Lyta?" Logan asked.

"She's fine. We're gonna let her sleep it off through the night, so it looks like we're both bachelor fathers' tonight," he replied.

"Great! We can tag-team the kids," Sheppard smiled.

"Where _is_ Chelsea?" Caldwell asked, looking around.

"Beckett took her, she was hungry," Sheppard replied.

"Why don't you go and take her to the mess for a real dinner? I'll be fine here," Logan said.

"We can bring dinner here..." Sheppard began.

"I'm supposed to be resting, remember? I won't be able to do that if I see all the junk you're bound to let her have!"

"Junk? I'll have you know that everything I feed her comes from the four basic food groups," he protested.

"YOUR four basic food groups! Fat, sugar, grease and salt!"

Sheppard looked to Caldwell for support, but Caldwell held up his hands. "Don't look at me, I get the same thing from my wife!"

After staring at the same spot on the ceiling for the past three hours, Logan finally gave up on trying to sleep and quietly got out of bed. She hadn't experienced any cramping or bleeding, no discomfort whatsoever, in fact. Sheppard had brought Chelsea back after dinner to say goodnight to her mother, and to bring her some pajama's, a robe and a change of clothes for the morning. She'd teasingly scolded Sheppard about allowing Chelsea to have ice-cream - something she knew from the tell-tale chocolate stains spotting Chelsea's clothes - but she didn't really give him too hard a time about it. She'd kissed them both goodnight and sent them on their way.

She snuck out of her room and tiptoed down the hall until she found Mitchell's room. He was lying in bed but, she was pleased to find him as wide awake as she was. He smiled happily when he saw her and lifted a hand in greeting. She came over to stand by his bedside, taking his hand in hers, then leaned down to kiss him tenderly on the forehead.

"Thank you, Cam..." she murmured.

"My pleasure," he drawled.

"Yeah... I've always found getting stunned by one of those things to be so pleasurable myself," she teased.

He reached over with his other hand and touched her belly. "Everything's okay, right?"

She held his hand there and nodded. "Yes, in fact if you just keep your hand there, the new cadet will probably..." she smiled as the baby picked that moment to kick.

Mitchell grinned happily. "Another all-star soccer player!" he teased.

"Or a dancer," she winced.

"So... why are you still in the infirmary if everything is okay?" he asked, brow furrowed in concern.

"Just a precaution. John wanted me to be here just in case something happened and Beckett agreed."

"He doesn't think anything WILL happen, does he?"

"No, not really, but it's better to be safe than sorry, right?" she sighed.

"Damn straight! You gonna hate me if I agree with them?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Kinda figured you would," she shrugged. "How are YOU feeling?"

"Aside from the needles...? I'm just peachy. I can even stand up... if no one's watching me."

"I really can't thank you enough, Cam. If you hadn't..."

"I'd never let anyone hurt you, Lo...You know that."

"Yes," she smiled weakly. "Yes, I do. Doesn't mean I can't be eternally grateful, does it?"

"Not necessary."

"It wasn't just me you saved, Cam...You saved my baby..." she began to tear up and Mitchell instinctively pulled her into an embrace to comfort her.

"I'd do it all again in a heartbeat, just to keep you guys safe..."

"I know," she sniffed.

They chatted about mundane things for a while until Logan was ready to go back to her room. She was hugging him and had just kissed him on the forehead when she heard someone clear their throat behind her.

"I don't think her husband would appreciate that," said an angry voice.

Logan looked over her shoulder. "Excuse me?!"

A pair of angry brown eyes were glaring daggers at Mitchell from the doorway. "Don't you think she's been through enough?"

Mitchell glared back. "Don't you think you should mind your own business?"

"I'm just looking out for her well-being, unlike yourself."

"You should get your facts straight before you make unfounded accusations, pal. That IS what you're doing, right? Making an accusation?"

"I am," he nodded. "And I'm _very_ well aware of how you tried to insinuate yourself into her life before,"

"ARE you now?" Mitchell's eyes were glittering darkly now.

"Yes, I _am_. And though I don't know him well, I'm quite sure Colonel Sheppard wouldn't appreciate you pawing at his wife. In fact, I think her husband would be quite displeased!"

Logan had been watching the two of them as if she were witnessing a game of tennis. "Her husband certainly wouldn't speak about her as if she weren't in the room!" she snapped.

The force of her words was enough to make him look at HER instead of Mitchell. "You should not be in here, Logan," he said.

"I shouldn't be visiting with my friend? The same friend who, just a few hours ago, saved the life of my unborn child and very likely my OWN?"

"His reasons for doing so are not quite as noble as you believe."

"You don't know him! And clearly you don't know ME!" she seethed.

"Lo...Take it easy..." Mitchell whispered.

"No... You know what? I can take it from here. Go back to sleep, Cam. I'll see you in the morning," she started walking toward the door.

"Like hell..." Mitchell began, throwing the covers off himself.

"Cameron! I can handle this!" Her eyes were flashing with anger and her tone was clear. She neither needed or wanted his assistance.

Mitchell stayed put, but continued to glare at his antagonist. "I swear, if you so much as lay one hand on her..."

"Goodnight Cameron!" Logan said forcefully and strode out of the room.

As she stepped into the hall and let the door close, she wheeled on him. "What the HELL was that?!" she demanded.

He was taken aback by the force of her tone. "I... as I said, I am simply looking out for your well-being," he explained.

"And what gives you the audacity to step in and make assumptions about my friends? Hell... JOHN's friends, for that matter?"

"That man is no friend to Colonel Sheppard."

"You couldn't BE more WRONG. Dammit, Gere! You don't know _him_ , you don't know _John_ and you certainly don't know _me_. You don't know our history. Our _true_ history. You don't know ANYTHING about us and you have no right to make accusations like that about any of us!" she bellowed.

"I know what a man in love looks like, and that man..."

"I am perfectly aware of what Cameron Mitchell's feelings are. For me, for John, for all the people here. I am not a child or some innocent waif who needs guidance from an older, wiser soul! You have no right to make assumptions or accusations regarding me or ANYONE in my life!"

"I never meant to offend you..."

"Well you _did_. And you offended one of the most decent men it has ever been my privilege to know! And I am _furious_ with you!"

"I apologize then."

"I accept your apology, but I would like to know what could possibly make you believe you had any right to do what you did."

Gere studied her face for a moment. She had no idea how he felt about her. How could she not see it, every time he looked at her. "I...assumed, perhaps incorrectly, that we were...friends."

Logan gaped at him incredulously. "And that would make it okay?!"

"I merely acted to protect you, however misguided the execution might have been."

"It's not that I don't appreciate the sentiment, Gere, but I am a grown woman. I've been making my own decisions for a long time now. I know who my friends are and who they aren't. I can appreciate an honest dialogue when a friend of mine disagrees with something I might do or have done, but... Gere...You were WAY out of line."

"Again, I apologize. I never meant to anger you."

"Well you did. And if you knew me at all, you would know just how much I loathe things like that and just how angry it makes me. So, in the future, don't take it upon yourself to assume the worst and attack my friends."

"As you wish," he murmured.

"Now goodnight!" she motioned for him to leave.

"May I... walk you back to your room?"

"No thank you! Please go... now."

"Very well. Goodnight Logan," he said and walked away.

Logan watched him go, still seething with anger. Mitchell had been watching their exchange through the window. He could see how upset and angry Logan was and he'd been getting increasingly concerned. When Gere left, he watched Logan standing there, clearly trying to compose herself, for a few moments. He was just about to climb out of bed when he heard her gasp in pain.

"Cam!" she cried out.

He still didn't have full control over his legs, but he shot out of bed and stumbled to the door in time to see her clutch her belly, pain etched on her face. He picked her up and carried her back over to his bed, where he lay her down gently and called for help.

"What is it, Logan? What's wrong?" he asked anxiously.

"The baby," she gasped, still clutching her belly tightly.


	48. Chapter 48

Beckett arrived a moment later. "What happened? What's she doing in here?"

"She was arguing with that Tollan guy, Gere, out in the hall and then she started having pains..." Mitchell hurriedly explained what happened.

Beckett began barking orders to his staff, ordering tests and the ultrasound equipment.

"Easy now, luv, we're gonna see what's going on in there..." he cooed to her.

Logan tensed up when another pain hit and she reached out to grab Mitchell's arm. He sat on the bed behind her and cradled her snugly against his chest, with one arm draped protectively across her front. Logan held onto his arm, pressing her face into his shoulder as she rode out the pain.

"Cam..." she gasped. "I can't...lose...the baby..." she cried.

"Don't you worry, sweetie...Doc Beckett's gonna take care of both of you...Try to relax...Try to stay calm..." he cooed.

Beckett looked up at him, impressed with his cool head under the circumstances. "Do you know the breathing, then?" he asked.

"Uh...yeah...We went over that when Chels was on the way..." he looked slightly panicked at the thought that this child might very well be coming far too early, but he kept his head.

"Don't worry son, it'll just help her relax a bit and help to control the pain... Can you do it?"

"Sure...sure...Right, Lo? You remember..." he smiled reassuringly at her.

She nodded uncertainly. "Okay..." she winced.

Mitchell got up, helping her to lay back against the pillows, and took her hand in his. The other hand he used to gently stroke her hair back away from her face.

"Okay sweetie...Just look at me...You know what to do...Just breathe now..." he spoke calmly and softly to put her at ease. "Atta girl, try to slow down your breathing...good...nice deep breath..."

She looked into Mitchell's eyes and tried not to think about the pain. Letting him set the pace, she did her best to follow suit.

"That's right, sweetie, just look at me...breathe...good! Squeeze my hand when it gets too bad...relax..."

She was laying on her side, staring intently into Mitchell's eyes and trying to stay focused. She didn't want to deliver this child prematurely, so she focused all her will on controlling her breathing and her contractions.

Sheppard suddenly burst into the room, pausing only long enough to take in the scene around her. Beckett was looking over her ultrasound scans and test results, while Mitchell was whispering to her and holding her hand. Mitchell motioned him over, but did not look up. As Sheppard came over, Mitchell stood up and moved over, to allow Sheppard to take his place.

"What are you..." he was slightly panicked.

"Just breathe with her, John...She knows what to do," he smiled encouragingly, placing Logan's hand in Sheppard's.

"Johnny," she croaked.

"Shhhh, shhh...Help me get the hang of this breathing thing," he murmured.

Logan continued her rhythmic breathing and soon Sheppard was following suit. She wasn't in as much pain, but her contractions were coming fairly regularly. Sheppard had been told a little bit about what had happened, but for now, he was at a loss to do anything but what he was doing, helping her to remain calm. He'd left Daniel and Kitah in charge of Chelsea, so he was free to concentrate solely on Logan and what she needed. He had a lot of questions for Beckett, but he didn't dare break eye contact with Logan until her condition stabilized. He kept a tight lid on his anger, for now, but he swore silently to himself that if anything happened to her or the baby, Sheppard would take out his anger on the Tollan, Gere.

He was vaguely aware of Beckett and Mitchell talking in the background, and he wanted to know what they were discussing, but there was no way for him to hear without Logan hearing it too, and he didn't want to upset her further. The grim look on Mitchell's face told him that the hews wasn't good, though, and he fought down a rising sense of panic.

"I'm sorry, Johnny..." Logan murmured between breaths.

"For what? This wasn't your fault," he cooed.

"I shouldn't have gotten so angry..." she said tearfully.

"Don't worry about that now...Just breathe, Sparks...Everything is going to be okay," he assured her.

"Chels?" she asked.

"She's fine, didn't even wake up when I took her to Daniel's," he smiled reassuringly.

"Good," she gasped as she lost focus and another pain hit her hard.

"Easy now, Sparks...breathe...breathe... Just look at me..."

"Like that's so hard?" she teased.

"Heh! Just look in my eyes, baby...Do you see how much I love you?" he murmured.

She smiled wanly up at him. "Yeah...Do you see how much I love you?"

He bent down and kissed her tenderly on the lips. "I do," he whispered.

"So what's it mean?" Mitchell asked Beckett, out of earshot of the others.

"It means we've got to do something to stop her labor, or she's going to end up delivering that baby... tonight!"

One of the nurses came up and whispered something in Mitchell's ear, prompting him to nod and look toward the door. He excused himself to Beckett and went out into the waiting room. All present were Caldwell, Weir, Daniel and McKay. A moment later, the door opened again to admit Bates and Fraser. He waved Fraser past him and she soon disappeared into the infirmary.

"What's going on?" Caldwell demanded.

"Logan's in early labor..." he informed them.

"Brought on by what? I thought she was fine earlier."

Mitchell nodded. "She was...at least until she got into it with that Tollan guy...Gere."

"What do you mean 'got into it' Colonel?" Weir asked.

"We were talking, Logan and I, and this guy comes in and starts making all kinds of cracks and accusations about inappropriate behavior and how she shouldn't be there and..."

"Oh boy!" said Caldwell and Daniel simultaneously, both knowing full well what her reaction must have been.

"How bad?" asked Daniel.

"She was _pissed_...As I'm sure you can imagine... She let him have it with both barrels and would have kept going if he hadn't given in and apologized."

"What were you doing at the time?"

"She wouldn't let me interfere... (looking to Daniel) You know what she's like...I just kept my head down and my eye on what was happening. She was okay until after he left, then all of a sudden - BAM! She gets this god-awful pain and went into labor."

"They CAN stop it, can't they?" Daniel asked.

Mitchell shrugged. "They're trying but... Beckett's pretty worried. Hopefully he and Doc Fraser can come up with something together to stop it."

"Do you want me to go pick up the Tollan, sir?" Bates asked.

Mitchell looked at Caldwell and shrugged. "I'd like to do a lot more than just pick him up, General, but I don't imagine that that's my call to make."

Caldwell nodded, his jaw clenching angrily. "As much as I agree with you, Colonel, it doesn't appear that he's done anything really criminal."

"He hasn't," Weir confirmed.

"We CAN, however, restrict his movements within the city, as well as his access to Colonel Devane, for the time being, at least."

"Consider it done sir," Bates said and headed out the door.

"Colonel," Weir began. "What prompted Gere to behave that way?"

Mitchell, Caldwell, McKay and Daniel all snorted in unison and shook their heads.

"What?" she asked.

"The guy's in love with her, Doctor," Mitchell replied.

"What makes you so sure?" she asked, getting the same snorting reply from the four of them.

"The vehemence with which he made the accusations was a pretty good indication of how he felt, but Bates and I both noticed the way he's been looking at her."

"I see. And you three (pointing at Caldwell, Daniel and McKay) don't seem particualrly shocked or surprised that Gere would fall for her."

"Been there," Daniel said.

Caldwell simply shrugged.

"She's a beautiful woman, Elizabeth, funny, charming, intelligent, strong... Why wouldn't he fall for her?" McKay said as though all of that should be as obvious to her as it was to them.

"Yes, she is all that, but the man hasn't really spent all that much time with her..."

She stopped when they all snorted again.

"Then again, I guess he wouldn't need to?" They all shook their heads negatively. "Well, then, I'm going to go notify Tarim about what's happened and explain to him why it would be better for Gere to steer clear of Atlantis, at least for a while. Keep me posted about Logan's condition?"

Caldwell nodded. "I will."

Inside, Beckett and Fraser were working feverishly to come up with a way to halt Logan's labor. The baby could survive, if delivered now but its chances for survival were slim. Sheppard had managed to keep her relatively calm and she didn't seem to be advancing further into labor, but that could change at any moment.

"Logan darlin', you're doing brilliantly," Beckett said encouragingly.

He was looking over her most recent ultrasound scan with Fraser. Sheppard smiled encouragingly down at Logan, who was exhausted but calm. Her contractions had lessened in both severity and frequency. At the moment, it looked like she was responding to the medication they'd given her to halt her labor, but it would be several hours before they would know for sure whether or not she'd be out of the woods.

Fraser encouraged her to try and get some sleep, as she'd been up for over twenty four hours now, and fighting to stave off early labor for ten of those hours. She was too tired to argue, so she gave in easily enough and closed her eyes. She drifted off almost immediately, eliciting a sigh of relief from Sheppard. When he was sure that she was deeply asleep, he pulled Beckett and Fraser aside to have a private conversation.

"How is she REALLY?" he asked.

"REALLY, John, she's doing very well," Beckett assured him.

"In fact, I'd be willing to bet that it was more sheer force of will than the medication keeping her from going into full-blown, irreversible labor," Fraser added.

"That's Logan," he sighed.

"What about the baby? The baby's okay, too, right?"

"The baby's fine. Heart rate, blood flow, everything appears to be normal. The wee one is likely to be a bit cranky, given what they've gone through, as I mentioned earlier, but there's been no damage." Beckett said authoritatively.

"Good...good," he yawned, nearly as exhausted as Logan himself.

"Why don't you get some rest, too, John. You won't be any good to her if you're wiped out," Fraser suggested.

"I need to stay with her...I should have stayed with her last night," he said.

"Now, now, lad...That's not your fault any more than it is hers," Beckett assured him.

"If I'd been here, she never would have even gotten out of bed."

"You don't believe that, do you?" Fraser smiled.

"Yeah...well...maybe..." he admitted.

"Rest, John...We'll wake you up if something comes up."

"I'll just...be right here..." he said, taking his seat next to her bed.

"Alright...Try not to worry, okay?" Fraser asked.

"I'll try...but have you MET my wife, Doc?" he said snarkily.

Fraser laughed. "Point taken," she grinned.

Sheppard put his head down, resting against Logan's side, and closed his eyes.

Three days passed and Logan seemed to have completely recovered from her ordeal. There had been no other signs of her slipping back into early labor and she finally felt secure enough to breathe a sigh of relief. Sheppard had been by her side day and night, leaving only at her insistence to eat or to check on Chelsea, who remained in Daniel and Kitah's care.

Tarim had stopped by to pay her a short visit and to apologize for Gere's behavior. He assured her that Gere would not be paying her a visit any time soon, and that he'd been mortified and consumed with guilt over any part he played in causing her to go into labor. Logan assured Tarim that she did not blame Gere for what happened to her, at least not entirely, but she did admit to feeling rather uneasy about his assumptions and assertions. Tarim assured her, again, that Gere would not cause her any further problems and then left her and Sheppard alone.

"You look like hell," she informed him.

"Yeah...? Well you look beautiful," he countered.

She smiled and reached up to caress his stubbled cheek. "I never said you weren't beautiful, babycakes..." she murmured.

He arched an eyebrow at her. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were flirting with me," he leered.

"Mmmmm...Must be out of practice...I AM flirting with you," she said.

"Well then..." he sat back and grinned lasciviously at her. "Proceed!"

She chuckled and then proceeded to tell him eveyrthing she was planning on doing to him, and with him, when she fully recovered.

"Promises, promises," he teased, though he'd clearly been affected by those promises.

"Just you wait, big guy...When I get the go-ahead...Well, let's just say, you'll be begging me to stop!"

He looked at her very seriously and said: "NEVER!"

As he moved to stand over her, the door opened and Mitchell peeked his head inside.

"Feel up to visitors?" he asked.

"Sure!" she said.

He walked in and Logan smiled even more when she saw who he'd brought with him.

"Chels!" she cried.

"Mama-Dada!" Chelsea squealed when she saw them.

"Hey!" grinned Sheppard as Mitchell put Chelsea down on Sheppard's lap.

Chelsea gave him a big, sloppy kiss then immediately reached for Logan. "Mama!" she gurgled.

"Here," she reached out for her daughter.

Sheppard gingerly placed her on the bed, next to Logan rather than on her lap.

"Be gentle," he admonished.

Chelsea happily snuggled into Logan's arms, resting her head against her side.

"Mama missed you," Logan cooed to her.

"Miss Mama-Dada," Chelsea replied.

Logan smiled gratefully up at Mitchell. "Thank you for bringing her here," she said.

"My pleasure," he grinned. "I'll...uh...just leave her here with you for a while," he drawled.

"No...Cam...You don't have to leave," she said.

"This is your time with her...We've already gone for a walk and had some...uh...fruit..." he stammered.

"Ice-keeem!" Chelsea squealed.

"And...uh...ice-cream..." he admitted sheepishly. "But it was fruit-flavored," he added with a self-redeeming effort.

"You're as bad as John..." Logan chuckled, shaking her head.

"What can I say? I'm a soft touch! Anyway...I'll be back later to pick her up."

"You wanna have dinner with us?" Sheppard offered.

"Oh...sure, love to!" he replied.

"No more ice-cream!" Logan warned.

"Okay," Sheppard and Mitchell answered simultaneously.

"I'll be back in... an hour?" he looked at Sheppard.

"See you then!"

The following day, Sheppard held her hand while Beckett gave her afinal exam prior to discharging her from the infirmary. They were somewhat nervous, although there hadn't been any more sign of her going back into labor, but Beckett was all smiles.

"Alright then, luv, everything looks good," he beamed.

"Good?" Sheppard asked.

"Good. The wee one is fine and so is Mum. I still want you to take it easy for the next week, no rushing right back to work, and we'll check on you in a week," he said.

"Okay...good," Sheppard said, still somewhat unsure.

"You know..." Beckett began. "With all the uncertainty of the past few days, I never brought it up, but...You know we did numerous ultrasounds and..."

"What?" They replied nervously.

"Nothing to be worried about, now. I was just wondering...Are either of you curious about the gender of your newest little bairn?"

Logan and Sheppard exchanged glances.

"I mean *I* know but, I can keep that to myself, if you prefer. We haven't discussed it before...And we didn't have the option with the little lass, since you weren't here luv, but..."

"I'm curious," Logan admitted.

"Yeah?" Sheppard looked at her.

"It'd be nice to actually call the baby him or her instead of 'it' or 'the baby'... Maybe make it easier to actually pick a name, not to mention personalize the nursery a bit more..."

"You really want to know?" Sheppard asked.

Logan nodded. "Yeah, I want to know."

"Me too," turning to Beckett. "So? Are we having a son or daughter?"

Beckett smiled and pulled out some ultrasound stills. "Logan, you can probably read these better than John here, but (pointing) here is the head, and right here we have the wee fingers..." he went on showing them the various body parts.

Sheppard got Logan and Chelsea settled back into their quarters, then happily went in search of the snacks Logan had asked for. He bumped into McKay on his way to the mess hall. McKay was suprised, and pleased to see him in such high spirits. "Logan must be doing well?" he asked.

"She's great!" Sheppard beamed.

"And the baby?" he asked.

"The baby is perfect!" he beamed some more.

"That's great... So that's why the whistling and the humming?"

"Who's whistling and humming and why?" Mitchell asked, coming around the corner.

"Sheppard," McKay replied.

"Then everything is...?"

"Great!" replied Sheppard.

He'd wanted to wait, but he couldn't contain himself. He reached into his pocket and withdrew the ultrasound photo that Beckett had given him and held it out for them to see.

"What are we looking at?" McKay said.

"That gentlemen," he said pointing at the image, "is a picture of my... son!"


	49. Chapter 49

Atlantis welcomed Nicolas Sheppard into the world right on schedule. This time, Sheppard was right by Logan's side as she gave birth to his child, and he'd fallen in love with her all over again. As with their first, this child bore a striking resemblance to his father, from the unruly dark brown hair, to the identical birthmark on his tiny tush. Chelsea had the same birthmark, so they weren't really surprised to see it on their son.

Gifts poured in from Earth and the Pegasus outposts and soon, they found themselves in need of even bigger quarters. They now had a suite with three bedrooms. Weir had warned them that if they continued to reproduce at their current rate, they would need to consolidate an entire wing for the Sheppard clan.

Chelsea was wonderful with her new baby brother, though she was scarcely more than a baby herself. She was enchanted by this new, smaller version of herself (though both kids were actually smaller versions of their father!) She babbled non-stop to him as if he understood every single word she said. He would stare at his sister intently as she "spoke" to him, which greatly amused their parents.

"Dad was right," Sheppard murmured to her as they watched from the doorway.

"About?"

"Kids. Remember when he was on us about having kids?" Sheppard smiled.

"Yes, I do. And yes, he WAS right," she agreed.

They were interrupted by the small, chocolate haired mini-Sheppard tugging at Logan's pant leg. "Feed Nic," she said simply.

They looked over at the cradle and almost on cue, Nicolas began to fuss.

"How does she do that?" Sheppard asked incredulously.

"Maybe they really CAN talk to one another?" Logan chuckled.

Sheppard bent down and picked up his daughter. "Come on sweet-pea, what say we go down to the mess and rustle up some lunch for you too?"

Chelsea put a hand on either side of his face and looked him right in the eye. "Good Dada," she smiled.

Sheppard felt his heart turn over, as it always did when it came to his family. "Well, I try, sweet-pea...I try," he grinned back, planting a kiss on her forehead. He melted even more when Chelsea wrapped her arms around his neck and laid her head on his shoulder. He leaned over and kissed Logan deeply, then turned Chelsea to face her mother.

"Give Mama kisses," he said.

"Love Mama," she replied, kissing her mother and giving her a quick squeeze.

"And Mama loves you," she beamed.

Now tired of waiting, Nicolas began to protest loudly as he became more demanding for sustenance.

"Uh-oh, feed Nic," Chelsea warned.

"I'm on it!" Logan chuckled.

THREE MONTHS LATER

Logan stood in the control room with Caldwell staring at the screen before them. Two large blips were moving inexorably toward the planet, and there was no mistake about who or what they were.

"Think our cover's finally been blown?" she asked.

"Not necessarily. We've had a few near misses before," Caldwell replied.

Sheppard and Weir soon joined them in the control room. Their finely tuned security procedures were already implemented. The village was already under cloak and Atlantis was about to cloak. All non-essential electronic equipment had been ordered shut down and civilian personnel had been ordered to quarters until the threat was over. Everything was checked and triple-checked to make sure they were giving off no detectable signal, E.M. or otherwise.

Over the years, they had perfected the art of camoflauge, but they were still amazed that the Wraith had never caught on to the fact that the city they thought destroyed, was in fact completely intact, and thriving. They had pulled out all the stops trying to find the Lantean Alpha-Site, but thus far, they'd been unsuccessful. Their cloaking and shielding technology had kept cities on many worlds safe from culling and the humans on those worlds were also thriving.

The four of them, Logan, Sheppard, Caldwell and Weir, took an inordinate amount of pleasure in the fact that they seemed to have the Wraith chasing their tails trying to find them, and through them a path to a rich new feeding ground.

"They don't seem to be turning away," Zelenka informed them.

"Let's stay calm, people. We've been here before," Caldwell instructed them.

"All the off-world teams have been warned or recalled, so we don't have to worry about the gate activating at an inopportune moment," Sheppard reported.

"Good. Everybody just sit tight now," Caldwell replied.

None of them took their eyes off the screen as the two blips drew closer and closer.

"Weapons systems?" Caldwell asked.

"Both the chair and the cannon are primed and ready, if we need them sir," Bates replied.

The Daedalus had been cloaked and shielded, along with the city and village, in case they were needed to fight off the hive ships. The tension mounted in the control room as everyone collectively held their breath and waited to see if their cover would hold. The Wraith ships finally stopped, but they held in orbit above the planet.

"Are they over us?" Caldwell asked.

Zelenka double-checked his readouts. "No. No, they're over the mainland."

"They're scanning," McKay added.

"For us?" Sheppard asked.

"Probably just looking for any life signs on the planet," McKay replied.

"Think they were tipped off?" Weir asked.

"By who? WE haven't told anyone out there about Atlantis surviving," Sheppard said.

"Then what are they looking for? And why?" Caldwell muttered.

"How close to the village are they?" Logan asked.

"They're on the opposite side of the land mass," Zelenka replied.

"Well, that much is good. If they send a landing party..."

Logan was cut off by McKay's sudden announcement. "They just transported about twenty or so down to the surface!"

They all exchanged worried, yet puzzled glances. What WERE they looking for? The hive ships had thus far taken no aggressive action, but that didn't mean they wouldn't if they found the village.

"If they expand that search to the other side of the mainland, they could bump right into the shield and our secret would be out," Sheppard mumbled.

"We're gonna have to decide what we're gonna do...And fast..." McKay warned, pointing at the monitor. "Two darts heading for the mainland right for the village."

"CRAP!" Caldwell, Logan and Sheppard said in unison.

"This is going to have to be perfectly synchronized," Caldwell explained.

"If we fire the Ion cannon at the same time the Daedalus de-cloaks, they might not notice where the shots are coming from. We'd have to take out the ones on the ground at the same time, to make sure they can't get a message out..." Sheppard said.

"We have no choice but to risk contacting the Daedalus to coordinate this...The darts and the ground forces will have to be taken out by the 302's," Caldwell informed them.

"No jumpers?" McKay asked.

"If even one of them sees a jumper and is able to get a message out they'll know we're here," Logan explained.

"Wait...The ones on the ground...What if we had the Daedalus beam them directly to the brig?" Logan asked.

"That way, they don't have a chance to get a message out AND they haven't seen anything that could give away our position," Sheppard grinned.

"Yeah...They already know the Daedalus is still in Pegasus, so they wouldn't be suspicious seeing it suddenly appear out of nowhere. They engage with her and they wouldn't see the shots coming from the Ion cannons. Plus, we may just be able to get some intel from our spankin' new prisoners!"

"Brilliant!" Caldwell smiled.

"That's why you pay me the big bucks!" Logan quipped.

"Let's get it done," Caldwell ordered.

They risked a quick data transmission to the Daedalus, informing them of the plan. They were to make sure all the cells used for the Wraith were doubly secure and have extra S.O.'s standing watch over them. Sedative gas would be pumped into the cells so the Wraith could be disarmed and secured without a fight, or the risk that one of them might be able to get a distress call out. There was also a chance that one or more of them might activate their personal self-destruct device once on board the ship.

At the appointed time, the Daedalus de-cloaked, as though just appearing from hyperspace and the offensive began. The twenty Wraith on the surface were beamed aboard the Daedalus and then the ship immediately began firing on the hive ships. One was destroyed with the first volley, having been taken completely by surprise. The other turned and left orbit to come directly at the Daedalus and was taken out by the Ion cannon, with Sheppard at the controls. The 302's had been launched the moment Daedalus de-cloaked and had taken out the darts within seconds.

Everything went off without a hitch. McKay and Zelenka checked and re-checked all the readings and scans and confirmed that the Wraith had not had time to send out a transmission before the hive ships and darts were destroyed. The twenty Wraith beamed aboard the Daedalus had succumbed to the sedative gas almost instantaneously upon beaming into the brig. Only one of them had reached for his self-destruct button, but he'd been overcome before he could manage it. S.O.'s wearing breathing apparatus entered the cells as soon as they were sure the Wraith were indeed unconscious. All of them were bound securely and then searched for any hidden weapons or communication devices. Once the prisoners had been secured, they turned off the gas and waited for them to awaken.

Logan left Bates in charge and accompanied Caldwell and Sheppard to the Daedalus. They offered Colonel Fox and his crew congratulations and thanks for a job well done. Even given how incredibly well-trained and disciplined they all were, it was still an impressive feat to have pulled off what they'd done, and Caldwell made a point of letting the entire crew know how proud he was of the job they were doing. When they were done with that, they went down to the brig to check on the prisoners. Of the twenty, only two were beginning to show signs of coming around, but they weren't there yet.

"What do you think they were doing?" Sheppard asked.

"Your guess is as good as mine," Caldwell shrugged.

"They didn't even bother scanning the oceans, so it might not be that our cover was blown... at least not entirely."

"Maybe they were looking for the Athosians?" Logan ventured.

"For food?" Sheppard asked.

"Or intel. They didn't even check the mainland for survivors after we made it look like Atlantis was destroyed. Maybe they just remembered that they were there and thought they could tell them where we're hiding?" Caldwell said.

"Maybe..." Logan said absently, her attention suddenly riveted to the monitor. "That one's awake, what say we ask him?"

"Yes... What say we?" Sheppard agreed.

They watched for a moment while the Wraith shakily got to his feet and began looking around in confusion. He checked to see if he still had his weapon, and then looked for his self-destruct. Unsuccessful on both counts, he turned to the other four Wraith in the cell with him and checked them for weapons.

"They've been disarmed, too," Sheppard said over the speaker.

The prisoner looked up and around to find the source of the voice speaking to him. "Who are you?" he asked.

"I was about to ask you the same question," Sheppard replied.

"I will tell you nothing," he said defiantly.

"We'll see. In the meantime, make yourself comfortable. You're going to be there for a long... lonnnng time."

Logan shook her head, smiling. "You're having too much fun with this, aren't you?"

Sheppard smirked. "Maybe just a little."

"How long before he starts in with the 'I am your death' schtick?" Caldwell asked, trying not to smirk himself.

"Not long, I'll bet," Sheppard grinned.

"Twenty minutes?"

Sheppard shrugged. "An hour, tops."

The three of them sat back and waited for the inevitable chest thumping and threats to begin.

Having just one Wraith repeat the same threats about sucking the life out of them was annoying enough, but to have twenty of them doing it, all at the same time, was completely off the scale. They weren't accomplishing anything this way, so they decided to gas them all again and then remove a few to solitary cells where they could be managed more easily. Without their cohorts, the Wraith displayed much less bravado. They were still arrogant and threatening, but it certainly was a lot less noisy.

Each of them took one of the three separated Wraith and interrogated them individually. Of the three of them, Caldwell seemed to be the one who was most enjoying the process. It wasn't often he had the chance to do things like this, being that he rarely went off-world, so the novelty hadn't worn thin. He also seemed to be the only one who was getting anywhere. Logan's prisoner had steadfastly refused to even speak to her, beyond his initial protests at having been captured and confined. She also suspected he had a bit of a chauvanistic attitude about dealing with a woman, much less a human. She found that very interesting, that a Wraith could be a chauvinist, given their matriarchal culture.

Before long, Sheppard and Logan gave up on the ones they'd been trying to interrogate and came to watch Caldwell work. Even Sheppard had to admit that he was masterful. It didn't take him long to glean the information they'd been hoping to get: WHY the Wraith had come to Lantea. What they learned had been sobering.

They hadn't come to seek food, or the Lanteans in particular. What they were looking for was a place to hibernate. The humans had made things so difficult for them that they were resorting to desperate measures to ensure their survival. This meant that most, or at least half of them, needed to "sleep" so that the others could store up enough food for the others. They wouldn't sleep for nearly as long as they usually did, but they had to do something to keep from starving.

"The tide really is turning," Logan murmured.

"There are still so many of them," Sheppard said.

"Yes but... If even half of them go into hibernation, it might make it easier for us to hunt them down and destroy them," Caldwell said.

"We'll definitely need more intel, but it does sound promising," Sheppard agreed.

Within three weeks, they had acquired all the intel they were likely ever to get out of their prisoners. Keeping one prisoner had always been relatively easy for them, but twenty captive Wraith soon began to take its toll. They had begun moving them from the Daedalus to the Atlantis brig, not quite sure what to do with them next. Killing them outright felt like stooping to their level, but they knew holding them indefinitely, without a food source might be the ultimate in cruelty. Either way, they could not afford to let them go, especially now that they knew Atlantis had survived.

Several of them had already attempted to escape and ended up dying in the attempt. Still, the others kept on trying until only two of them remained, choosing discretion as the better part of valor. They had been livid, upon transfer to the Atlantis brig, to learn that they had been duped when they thought Atlantis had been destroyed. It had to be humiliating for them to realize that they'd been bested by mere humans. Sheppard, of course, enjoyed their discomfort immensely.

His spirits were high, as he returned to their quarters and he suggested to Logan that a family picnic at the beach might be in order. Logan cheerily agreed and set about getting the things they would need for the kids together while Sheppard ran down to the mess to rustle up the food for their picnic. Nicolas, of course, had everything he needed in Logan, and Chelsea would eat virtually anything they let her put in her mouth. This was just another way in which she resembled her father.

Logan smiled and took a deep breath as their favorite beach came into view. It had been so long since she'd been surfing and she couldn't wait to hit the waves. She and Sheppard had agreed to take turns with the kids while the other surfed and Sheppard, gentleman that he was, graciously offered to take the first watch over the kids. Once they'd unloaded the supplies and the kids, Logan took her board and ran out into the surf. Chelsea watched her with intense interest as she dove under the crashing waves to emerge farther and farther out.

Chelsea pointed at her and looked at Sheppard questioningly. "Mama?" she asked.

"Watch baby... Mama's gonna ride the waves," he smiled reassuringly.

She watched wide-eyed as Logan began paddling ahead of a big wave and then stood up on her board. Chelsea clapped as Logan rode the wave all the way to the shore, waved and then ran back into the water.

"Wanna ride!" Chelsea squealed as Sheppard held onto her securely.

"It's in your blood, baby, but you're still a little young," he told her.

Young Nicolas was barely four months old but he'd already developed a love for the water. When he woke from his nap, Sheppard took Chelsea and Nic down to the shoreline and allowed Chelsea to play in the smaller waves while he gently dipped Nicolas in the water to gauge his reaction to the colder water. He shuddered at first and then he seemed to take to it like a duck to water.

"That's my boy," Sheppard chuckled.

Chelsea was just waiting for an opportunity to slip away from Sheppard and paddle out to her mother. She was as brave and as bold as either of her parents and constantly kept them on their toes. Sheppard was ready for it when she finally made a break for the deeper water and he scooped her up with his free arm. He carried both kids back to the blanket and dried them off.

After a while, Logan tired and returned to the shore to rejoin her family. She felt invigorated and free for the first time in months. Rather than taking a seat on the blanket, she plopped herself down, dripping wet, onto Sheppard's lap and planted a searing kiss on him.

Dazed but pleased, he shook his head and grinned up at her. "Okay...You HAVE to tell me what I did to deserve that so I can do it again!"

"Thank you for doing this," she murmured.

"You're welcome," he smirked.

"And I will thank you PROPERLY later... when the kids are asleep," she promised.

"N'kay..." he grinned happily.

"Ches ride waves!" Chelsea demanded.

"Not yet, you don't sweet-pea!" Logan told her.

"Wanna," she protested.

"What if I just take her out for a little..."

"JOHN!" she cut him off.

"We'll just sit on the board for a little bit," he murmured.

"She's not even TWO," she said nervously.

"She swims like a fish, we've already seen to that," he countered.

"Yeah... in calmer water, not in the waves."

"Ride waves, ride waves, ride waves," Chelsea sing-songed insistently.

"I'll be careful, I promise," Sheppard said pleadingly.

The two of them together were an impossible force to resist so she reluctantly caved in. "Just for a little while," she muttered.

Sheppard scooped up his daughter before Logan could change her mind. "Thanks Mama!" they said as they charged for the water.

Logan shook her head and looked down at her smiling son and felt her heart constrict. "You have your fathers' lethal smile, my love... God help any girl that crosses your path!" she chuckled.

LATER THAT NIGHT

Logan and Sheppard stood in the darkened room watching both their children sleep. Both of them were exhausted from their afternoon at the beach, though Chelsea fought her fatigue to the end. When they'd returned to the city, she'd made a point of telling anyone who would listen how she'd *surfed* with Daddy. In actuality, they'd spent the majority of their time in the water bobbing up and down on the swells while sitting on Sheppard's surfboard. Although, he did, much to her horror, bring her in a couple of times on a smaller wave. As promised, they'd both remained seated, Chelsea clenched firmly in his arms and on his lap. She, of course, loved every minute of it and was now a confirmed surf-addict.

"You see? Safe and sound and snug in their beds," Sheppard grinned.

"Mmmm-hmmmm... You about gave me a heart attack, though, when I saw the two of you ride that first wave in," she groused.

"She LOVED it!" he protested.

"I know she loved it, and now you've created a monster!"

"What?" he looked at her in mock indignation. "You love to surf, too!"

"Yes dear... But I'm all grown up," she murmured.

Sheppard grinned and then turned to leer down at her. "Yes you are," he whispered. "And now it's time for the grown-ups to play," he reached out and pulled her to him. Logan kissed him eagerly, unable to stay miffed at him for very long. He swept her off her feet and was carrying her to their bedroom when they heard an urgent knock at the door.

"Nonononononono," Sheppard pleaded.

"It must be important, at this hour," she said, every bit as disappointed as he.

"It better be," he growled, setting her back on her feet and straightening out his clothes before going to answer the door.

When the door opened he was very surprised to find Teal'c standing there, looking dark and dangerous. "Teal'c... What's wrong?"

"I must speak with you, Colonel Sheppard," he announced simply.

"Okay... Come on in," Sheppard motioned him inside.

"I am here because of Hope," he said.

Logan gasped from behind him. "Hope? She's alright, isn't she?"

"I am afraid not," he replied, anger flashing in his eyes.

"What happened?" Sheppard asked.

"Hope has been having nightmares for some time now. We were told that this is normal with children, especially when they feel their parents are threatened or in danger."

"Sounds normal," Logan said.

"In fact it is not, Logan Devane. Not in this case."

"What are her nightmares about?" Sheppard asked.

"The Wraith."

"Does that really surprise you, given her lineage?" Sheppard asked.

"It is not surprising on its surface, no. However, these nightmares are very specific - rather, they are not truly nightmares in fact."

"What do you mean?" Logan asked.

"We believe now that Hope has somehow telepathically been connected to the Wraith prisoners here in Atlantis - and they are feeding her some rather gruesome images!" his eyes had darkened considerably as he spoke.

Logan knew Teal'c better than most people and she was quick to recognize that he was at his limit. He'd controlled his anger and protectiveness enough to come and seek them out rather than to go and do what he wanted to: Kill the Wraith prisoners.


	50. Chapter 50

Another frantic knock at the door brought them all to their feet. Teyla was standing there, blind panic in her eyes.

"Teyla?" Teal'c began.

"She is gone!" she cried.

"Hope? When?" he asked.

"A few minutes. I left the room for only a moment and when I returned, she was gone!"

None of them had ever seen Teyla so completely freaked out before. It was very disturbing.

"Go!" Logan told them.

As much as she wanted to go with them, she had responsibilities there to attend to first. Teal'c, Sheppard and Teyla hurried out the door and ran down the hall. It was not yet terribly late, so she knew Rylin would still be up. She was extremely happy that they'd finally settled on a sitter for the children - one who would be available during non-working hours. Rylin was the teenage daughter of Lyta's sister. They'd been quartered very near to the Sheppard family for the express purpose of being nearby and available to the couples with young children, and they were well compensated for those child care duties.

As she suited up, Logan called Rylin on the intercom and asked her to come stay with the children while she and Sheppard were out on an emergency. The girl showed up just moments later and, after a brief explanation, Logan was soon dashing off down the hall to aid in the search for little Hope. Keying her mic, she first called Bates and ordered him to gather the security teams, then she called Sheppard.

"Anyone think to check the brig?" she asked.

"The brig? There are guards, she couldn't...(looking at Teal'c) could she?" Sheppard asked.

"It is possible," Teal'c said.

"Brig it is then," Sheppard said and the three of them hurried back in the other direction.

Hope stood in the doorway staring tearfully at the two Wraith prisoners. They'd called to her, telepathically, and lured her down to the brig. The poor child was defenseless against that call. They had been filling her head with all kinds of images, none of them pleasant, and all of them designed to build a wedge between her and the humans who cared for her. Even now they were telling her that the humans would use her for experiments and eventually kill her, just as they had killed her REAL parents so they could steal her. While she didn't understand much of what they told her, she understood the feeling behind it. It was they who compelled her to steal Teyla's hand-held stunner and use it on the guards so she could gain access to the brig. Now they were trying to get her to shut down the security system locking them in the cell.

Hope was reaching for the controls to the cell shield when Teal'c, Sheppard and Teyla charged into the brig. She cried out in fear and pain as the Wraith sent her a stern command to fire at them. Unable to help herself, the tiny girl wheeled, pointed the stunner at them and fired. Teal'c and Sheppard were both partially hit and then Teyla, who barely dove out of the way in time to avoid receiving a full blast. All three were on the floor, struggling to regain control of their limbs.

"Hope..." Teyla gasped. "Listen to Mama..."

The Wraith bombarded Hope with images and instructions in an effort to drown out Teyla's voice. The child was crumbling under the weight of the onslaught. She was horrified at what they'd made her do to her parents and to Uncle John.

"Mama..." she pleaded.

The Wraith then turned their attention to Teyla, whom they sensed they could reach in the same manner. She'd just made it to her feet when the onslaught came. Grabbing her head, she screamed and sank back to her knees. Teyla fought desperately for control as they tried to take over her mind as others had done in the past. With two of them working on her together, she was rapidly losing the battle. The pain from their attack was excruciating, but she somehow managed to hold on.

Hope, in a vain and desperate attempt to stop the attack on her mother, reached for the controls and shut down the shield. A moment later the Wraith emerged from the cell and began walking toward Hope. Suddenly, Teal'c managed to move his arm just enough to fire a few zat blasts at the first Wraith, who was kneeling before his tiny daughter. As the first one went down, the second Wraith grabbed the stunner from Hope's hand and fired it at Teal'c. The big Jaffa went down and didn't move.

Logan arrived just as he was aiming another blast at Sheppard, who was struggling to aim his P-90 at the Wraith. She fired off about five shots, throwing the Wraith back against the wall. When he recovered, all too quickly for her taste, and lunged toward Hope Logan fired off five more shots. This time, the Wraith went down, though not for long. When he moved to fire at her, she nailed him with another five shots. Finally, he stopped moving and then died.

Hope crumpled to the floor next to Teyla and cried her little heart out. Logan checked Teal'c and Sheppard for injuries, and once satisfied that they were alright, she moved to check on Teyla and Hope. The poor little girl was terrified and heartbroken over what she'd just been through. Logan helped Teyla to a sitting position and picked up Hope to place her in Teyla's lap.

"Teyla?" Logan gave her a gentle shake. "Teyla, are you alright?"

"I am well enough... now..." she croaked, looking down at Hope's tearful face.

"Mama," she cried. "Papa's hurt," she pointed at Teal'c.

"Papa will be fine, sweetie," Logan assured her. He is just sleeping right now."

Still crying, she looked at Sheppard. "Uncle John?"

"He's sleeping, too, honey. But they'll be fine," Logan assured her.

"I'm scared..." she cried.

"I know baby, but those guys can't hurt you anymore... Or ever again."

After giving her report to Caldwell, Logan went down to the infirmary to check on the new patients. Teal'c and the guards Hope had taken out by stunner were due to be released in the morning. Teyla and Sheppard had already been released, but little Hope was to remain for observation. The truth was, even Teyla agreed that it was possible the Wraith had left some, as yet, unknown commands planted in her mind and they wanted to be sure that she wouldn't harm herself or anyone else.

Logan agreed to let Bates post a guard, surreptitiously, outside the room she would be sharing with Teal'c for the night. They all adored Hope, and most had all but forgotten her lineage over time, but it was clear now that the child could have become a security risk. It had taken Teyla a long time to be able to fight back, telepathically, against the mind of the Wraith, but Hope was just a small child. She didn't yet posess the strength or the will to fight off a full-grown Wraith, much less two.

They all agreed to try and keep Hope's part in the attempted escape as quiet as possible, to keep people from ostracizing the poor child. There were many who would be afraid of her, if they knew what had happened, and they would behave accordingly. The only people who really needed to know, did know, and they would leave it at that.

Logan bade the others goodnight as she led a still tingling Sheppard back to their quarters. After checking on the children and sending Rylin back to her quarters, Logan decided to take a hot bath before turning in herself. She was surprised when Sheppard slipped into the tub and settled in behind her. She leaned back against his chest and sighed contentedly as he wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled the curve of her neck.

"You should be resting," she murmured softly.

"I am," he sighed.

She looked over her shoulder at him and smiled. "How restful is it going to be, sharing a bath with me? You know what ALWAYS happens whenever we're in close proximity... Especially close NAKED proximity..."

He groaned and pressed his lips against the warm skin of her neck. "You know, one of the worst side effects of those damned Wraith stunners is that, even after you're finally able to move again, you don't really get all the feeling back in your... erm... nether regions... for a while," he groused.

"Ah... You never told me that before," she said sympathetically.

"It was never an issue before," he shrugged. "Now, here I am with my gorgeous, naked wife, all to myself and I can't even..."

Logan suddenly turned and planted a deep, searing, passionate kiss on his mouth, cutting him off in mid-sentence. Sheppard was breathless when she finally broke the kiss and looked up at him in her most vixenish way. "Wha..." he mumbled.

"Just checking," she teased.

He shook his head and then wagged a finger at her. "That's just so... wrong..." he chided her.

"Ah, sweetie... I'm just trying to fulfill my wifely duties... You know... doing my part to keep the home fires burning?"

He chuckled and pulled her back against him. "It's not that the spirit isn't willing, Sparks... It's just the flesh is..."

Logan chuckled softly. "It's okay, Flyboy. You'll just have to make it up to me tomorrow," she said.

"Count on it," he grinned eagerly.

"I always do," she murmured.

TWO DAYS LATER

"You're what?!" Logan squealed with delight.

"Don't tell me you're surprised," Weir replied sheepishly.

"I suppose I shouldn't be, but... Elizabeth, that's fantastic!" Logan hugged her.

"What is fantastic?" Teyla asked as she entered the room.

"Yeah, what?" Carter added.

"Elizabeth?" Logan prodded.

"Tarik and I... We're getting married!" she beamed.

"What?! That's great!" Carter gushed.

"That IS happy news," Teyla agreed, hugging Weir.

"When?" Carter asked.

"Haven't set a date yet, but sooner rather than later," Weir replied.

"You'll be having the wedding here, right?" Logan asked.

"Of course! We wouldn't dream of having it anywhere else."

Kitah and Lyta soon joined them in celebrating the happy news. The women chatted and giggled for the better part of an hour until Sheppard happened upon them.

"Well, this is a happy contingent," he noted.

The women looked at him, suddenly clamming up guiltily.

"What?" Sheppard asked uncertainly.

All at once, they broke out into fits of giggles, making Sheppard one very uncomfortable man. "What'd I just walk in on?"

His obvious discomfort merely added fuel to the fire and the women erupted into raucous laughter. Even Logan couldn't help him.

"I'm just gonna...go...now..." Sheppard stammered and began backing out the door.

Out in the hall, he bumped into Caldwell and Lorne, who were about to go into the room he just exited. Sheppard held up a hand and shook his head negatively. "You guys do NOT want to go in there!" he warned.

"Why? What's wrong?" Caldwell asked, somewhat alarmed by the look on his face.

"There are six women in there and they're acting very... strangely."

"Define strange?" Caldwell said.

"SIX women?" Lorne asked eagerly, clearly excited by the prospect.

"Down fella, they're all spoken for," Sheppard said.

"You were saying?" Caldwell reminded him.

"They're all laughing and giggling. Every time I opened my mouth, it just got worse..." he shook his head.

Caldwell smiled, evidently familiar with such behavior. "Girl talk," he muttered.

"Huh?" replied Sheppard and Lorne.

"Girl talk. You know, when women have a chance to get together, away from work and away from men and kids... They're probably talking about us."

"Us?" Sheppard asked.

"Men."

"Why?" Lorne asked.

"Who knows... They like to vent about our bad habits, or the stupid things we do, that kind of stuff." Caldwell shrugged.

"They're pretty worked up in there... Do we mess up that much?" Sheppard asked.

"No. But, you get enough of them together and it turns into a sort of feeding frenzy. Who's in there anyway?" Caldwell asked.

"Logan, Elizabeth, Teyla, Carter, Kitah and Lyta."

"We'd better go," Caldwell warned.

"Why?" Lorne asked.

"Trust me, you don't want to be in the line of fire when they decide to break it up," Caldwell informed him.

TWO MONTHS LATER

"Since when?!" Logan and Sheppard blurted in unison.

"Apparently there are more than a few who want to break with the leadership, and they want our help to do it," Weir informed them.

"Sure they do," Logan muttered.

"Why should we believe them?" Sheppard asked.

"No one said we do, I'm just saying the overture has been made," Weir replied.

"And you're considering it," Sheppard said in disgust.

"They can't all be bad, John. You know that as well as I do."

"The mistrust and animosity they have towards all outsiders... It's practically genetic, Elizabeth."

Logan nodded her head. "He's right, you know. We never could convince any of them that they were wrong about us before, why the sudden change of heart?"

Caldwell looked over at Weir and shrugged. "Revolution has to start somewhere," he said.

"It would be nice if we could stop fighting them in addition to the Wraith for a change," Weir pointed out.

"Yes, it would be, but look at who were talking about!" Sheppard muttered.

"I understand your position, John, and yours too, Logan. Neither one of you has any reason to trust them, but think of the possibilities!"

"We have!" They chimed together.

"I mean the possibilities of a REAL alliance. If they are on the level and we do help them oust the old government in favor of a new, friendlier more open-minded one..." she argued.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, everything would be sunshine and daisies. Pardon me if I don't buy it!" Sheppard said irritably.

"The bottom line is, we need to find out whether or not they ARE on the level, Colonels. If it's a trap, we'll be ready for them; if not, then we have a duty and an obligation to help those who ask for our help. Colonel Sheppard, if you don't feel like you can be involved, we can always send Mitchell's team out there," Caldwell said.

Sheppard bristled. "I can handle it," he grunted.

"Are you sure? No one would blame you if you wanted to sit this one out," Weir said.

"I can handle it!" he repeated.

"Okay then, let's work on our strategy," Caldwell said.

Logan and Sheppard exchanged concerned looks, knowing full-well what the other was thinking, but neither said anything further. They discussed all their options and perfected their strategies over the next few hours. One decision, which made them feel a little better, was that they would not bring any of them back to Atlantis until and unless they were absolutely sure they were on the level and had proven that they could be trusted.

Even then, Sheppard was still sure he didn't want even a single Genii anywhere near his family. He hadn't forgotten how they'd almost cost him his family before. He would never get back the time he'd lost with Logan during her first pregnancy, or missing out on Chelsea's birth and first few weeks of life. Stranding them on that planet may not have been their original intention, but it was a direct result of the Genii's unwavering hatred toward the Lanteans. These rebel-Genii might be able to convince Weir of their sincerity, but Sheppard would remain skeptical and suspicious no matter what.

Weir spent six weeks meeting and negotiating with the rebel Genii, trying to iron out terms for an alliance, not only against the Wraith, but against the existing Genii government as well. All negotiations were conducted off world at a neutral location, to ensure the security of both parties. After a grueling process, Weir finally agreed to allow the Genii reps to come to Atlantis, though they referred to their home as "New Lantea" so as to throw off anyone who might want to blow their cover.

With the exception of the Tollan, none of even their closest allies in the Pegasus Galaxy knew that Atlantis had survived the Wraith attack all those years ago. As far as they were concerned, the Lantean Tau'ri had established a new colony on another world after escaping through the stargate just before the city was destroyed. The ruse had held all these years, and they weren't about to let anyone, much less the Genii, find out otherwise and expose them.

As far as Weir was concerned, she believed everyone on the contingent she met with genuinely wanted an alliance and an end to hostility between their two peoples. The stories they told were of a vengeful dictator who wanted to destroy the Lantean Tau'ri at all costs and steal the technology they possessed. Cowan was portrayed as an evil despot who would gladly sacrifice as many Genii lives as it took to achieve that goal, and anyone who opposed him was either put to death or bound into slave labor in the radiation filled labs under the surface for the rest of their lives. They also told of mass abductions on other planets, for the sole purpose of acquiring more people for forced labor.

Sheppard, having met the man, believed this part to be true. In many ways, Cowan and his ilk were not much better than the Wraith. They cared nothing for the lives they took or ruined, stopping at nothing to achieve their goals. But Sheppard was not convinced that these rebel Genii were any more trustworthy than the government they sought to overthrow. He remained aloof and distant to any overtures made by them and kept a keen eye out for any sign of a double-cross.

Logan was of the same mind as Sheppard, not only because he was her husband, but because of her own experiences with the Genii; Kolya especially. She, Bates and Sheppard had worked out a strict plan to keep any Genii vistors isolated and far away from any of the command and control centers of the Ancient city they were using as New Lantea. Caldwell and O'Neill could not be swayed by Weir's impassioned arguments that these few Genii could be trusted, especially one young woman in particular who had lost her entire family because of Cowan and the Wraith, so Logan suggested passing off one of their other cities as New Lantea.

They all agreed that they would much rather go to the trouble of relocating themselves temporarily, than to risk exposing Atlantis unnecessarily. There were already several science teams in residence, as well as a strong military contingent, so all they needed to do was to move in a few key members of the senior staff in order to make their ruse work. Weir and Tarik moved in, as did McKay, Beckett, Teal'c, Teyla and Hope, Daniel and Kitah, with David, Caldwell and his family, and finally Logan and Sheppard with their kids.

Once everyone and everything was in place, Sheppard took a several teams to the rendezvous point to meet and bring back the Genii rebels. Logan and Bates had gone over everything with a fine tooth comb and felt confident that none of the Genii would be able to breach their security protocols. The Daedalus had even been placed on alert, so they could be there at a moment's notice, should the need arise. Even in her heightened state of readiness, Logan felt the spike in her adrenaline levels the moment the rebel Genii set foot through the gate.

Her eyes met Sheppard's as he stepped through the gate and gave the order to shut it down. There were six representatives in all, but they were surrounded on every side by Logan's S.O.'s and Sheppard's team. Daniel and Weir stepped forward to greet and welcome them to New Lantea. The Genii were understandably nervous and quite taken aback by the modern facility. Their own technology and infrastructure paled in comparison, and it was all they could do not to gawk at everything.

"I trust there were no problems... on either side?" Weir asked.

"All went well," replied Vanu, the rebel spokesperson.

"Good, I'm glad to hear it. If you'll all follow me, we can all have a seat in the conference room."

Weir led them through a door at the far end of the gateroom. Present for the discussions on their side were Weir, Daniel, Caldwell, Sheppard, Logan, McKay, Beckett and Teyla. The Genii reps were Vanu, Roth, Deria, Jaci, Feres and Kiel. Of the six of them, only Roth, had any military experience, the rest were farmers and laborers. On the surface, they appeared to be everything Weir believed them to be, but that did little to convince anyone but Daniel and Weir.

Logan soon found herself bored silly by diplomatic issues and the like and it was all she could do to focus on the business at hand. Maybe that was their plan: To have the Lanteans so incredibly bored and lethargic so they wouldn't see an attack coming. Sheppard noted the fleeting smirk on her face and winked at her from across the room. He knew her so well. Fact of the matter was, he'd been thinking along those same lines. He tended to zone out, much in the same manner as General O'Neill did, when it came to diplomacy or technobabble. It wasn't that he didn't understand it, he just wasn't interested.

Caldwell brought both of them back with a sharp glance in their directions. He knew them well, too. He'd seen their eyes glaze over as the discussion droned on and on. Much as he would like to zone out himself, he knew it was important for them, for ALL of them to pay attention and look for any discrepancies or signs of subterfuge on the part of the Genii.

By the time they adjourned for a break, Logan thought she would lose her mind. Lunch had been prepared for them and Weir asked Logan, Sheppard and Teyla to escort their guests to the mess hall, and to show them a little bit of the city on their way. They did as requested, followed by McKay and Beckett. They took turns answering the questions posed by their visitors and tried desperately not to show the hostility they felt towards them.

"You do not trust us," Feres said to Logan when they sat down to eat.

Logan paused a moment before answering. "No, I don't," she replied honestly.

"My people have given you scant reason to," she admitted.

"You have nooooo idea," she said.

"Dr. Weir has told us some of what you have endured at the hands of some of the Genii. All I can say is that WE are not THEY," she smiled warmly.

"Fair enough," Logan murmured, trying to be diplomatic.

"I...WE... should very much like to hear your stories about doing battle with the Wraith. Even though your city was destroyed, you still manage to do considerable detriment to their ranks," Roth said admiringly.

"A lot of luck, some skill and a strong will to survive," Sheppard said.

Suddenly Jaci gasped as she looked across the room. Rylin had just entered with Kitah and the children. They all turned to see what she was staring at and immediately Logan and Sheppard jumped up to head off Chelsea, who squealed in delight at the sight of her parents.

"Mama, Daddy!"

Sheppard reached her first and scooped her up in his arms. Nic was now squirming and squawking in Rylin's arms, wanting his parents as well. Logan took him in her arms and planted a kiss on the top of his head.

"Unca Roddey!" Chelsea called out, waving to one of her favorite "uncle's".

"Hi kid!" he waved back.

Jaci looked at him, surprised etched across her face. "You keep children here? At a military installation?" she asked.

McKay looked from her to the children. He knew that neither Sheppard or Logan wanted to share any details about their children, but there was no denying who they belonged to, even if the children hadn't already given it away. "Uh...yes..." he stammered.

"This is our home, Jaci. Are soldiers not entitled to have families, too?" Teyla intervened.

"Of course... We just... Children aren't allowed anywhere near the military facilities on our homeworld."

"You will find there are a great many differences between our people and yours," Beckett pointed out.

"Indeed," Feres said.

In the interests of civility and good relations, Sheppard and Logan reluctantly brought the children over to introduce them to their visitors. The Genii were respectful and complimentary, remarking how much both children looked like Colonel Sheppard, and congratulating them on being able to balance soldiering with family life.

Nothing, in particular, set off any major alarms for Logan, but she got the sudden, unshakeable feeling that something was amiss. No one did or said anything even remotely threatening, or suspicious, but her gut was screaming that something was wrong. Sheppard noticed her expression and was instantly on guard himself. For the rest of the day, they remained alert for any sign of trouble, but trouble never came.


	51. Chapter 51

AUTHOR'S NOTE: To Guest 64: Thank you most kindly for your generous and thoughtful reviews. Your feedback is MUCH appreciated! END AUTHOR'S NOTE

In the three days since the Genii rebels arrived in the Ancient city nothing untoward happened. Most people there were beginning to relax a bit more, believing that the rebels were no threat. Neither Logan or Sheppard ever relaxed their stance on the matter, however, and they remained as vigilant about security as they had been from the moment they learned they'd be coming.

Logan could not shake the feeling that something was horribly wrong, but there were no outward indications of trouble in any form coming from the rebels. Even acknowledging that Weir might be correct about her feelings about the rebels being based solely on her experiences with other Genii, she still couldn't bring herself to trust them.

Another week passed and still there were no problems. Almost everyone in the Lantean camp was starting to lean toward the idea that these rebels were really sincere in their desire to break away from the current regime and form a partnership with the Lanteans. There were now but a few who remained suspicious of their true motives: Logan, Sheppard, McKay, Teal'c and, fortunately, Caldwell. As military commander, he had final say in releasing any restrictions placed on the rebels, and since he didn't completely trust them, he was not inclined to do so.

When yet another week passed without incident, Caldwell was hard-pressed to come up with a reason not to formalize an alliance between their two peoples. He had shared this with them over dinner one evening, and asked them to come up with something concrete, or the matter might be taken out of his hands.

That night, Logan and Sheppard sat down and discussed what had or hadn't happened that might indicate the need for further questioning of the rebels. Try as they might, they couldn't come up with one single shred of evidence to support their reasoning not to trust the Genii. No, they didn't really NEED the Genii as allies, but it would be very nice if they didn't have to worry about having them as enemies, constantly looking over their shoulders for Genii operatives, in addition to the enormity of defending themselves and others against the Wraith. They went to bed that night without any proof or plan as to how to get to the truth concerning the rebels.

Logan woke the next morning to find that, not only had the sun already risen in the sky, but it was well past noon! She looked over and found Sheppard still sleeping beside her. She bolted upright and was immediately overcome with pain and nausea. She cried out, grabbing her head and sank back against the pillows.

"John," she gasped. "John, wake up!" she cried.

A terrible feeling of dread suddenly washed over her, she threw the covers off and tried to get to her feet. To her horror, she found that she was unable to stand. "JOHN!" she yelled, causing herself even more pain, but she was rewarded by a low groan from her husband. Logan dropped to the floor and began crawling toward the other bedroom.

As she reached the doorway to the childrens' room, she could hear screams emanating from down the hall. The same scream that came from deep in her soul when she looked into the empty bed and crib of her children.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" she screamed.

There was a loud thump from the other room. Sheppard reacted instinctively to his wife's agonized scream, though his legs and arms were slow to respond. "Logan?" he croaked, crawling toward the childrens' room.

Adrenaline pumped into her system and Logan got to her feet through sheer force of will. She staggered back out to find Sheppard on the floor. "The kids..." her face was white.

"Where...?" was all he could manage.

"They're gone!" she cried.

Sheppard too, pulled himself to his feet and stumbled along behind her. "Gone...? What?"

Logan made her way to the door and out to the hall. She could hear Kitah and now Lyta screaming hysterically on either side of their quarters. S.O.'s were lying in the hallways, barely able to move, but struggling to get to their feet. Sheppard grabbed a P-90 from one of them and took off toward the control room. Logan went to Caldwell's quarters. He and Lyta were in the same physical state as everyone else appeared to be. Caldwell looked over at her helplessly, as he tried in vain to comfort his wife.

"Yours too?" he asked.

Logan nodded. "And Daniel's..."

The shock was beginning to wear off, and the anger to take over. "Genii!" she hissed and then hurried out as fast as her shaking limbs would allow.

Sheppard beat her to the quarters where the Genii had been housed. Where every S.O. assigned to them lay or sit on the floor in varying states of incapacity. "They're all here except for the one called Vanu," he informed her.

"Dammit! I knew it!" she seethed.

She was barely keeping a lid on her rage. The thought of the Genii, any Genii, so much as touching her children was maddening. But they didn't just have hers; it looked like they had all the Lantean children - even Hope! Logan knew that losing her temper at this point wouldn't help the children, so she kept a tight grip on her emotions. She would save her rage for the ones holding their babies.

They roused the S.O.'s, at least well enough to guard the remaining Genii, then sent a few to rouse Beckett and to inform Caldwell and Weir about what was happening. They then set their angry sights on the rebels, who were looking around as though they had no idea what was going on.

"Where... is... she?" Sheppard demanded, holding his gun on Roth's head.

"She...?" he looked around, somewhat confused still.

"The one called Vanu. Where did she go?" Logan asked.

"Vanu? She was here when we all retired for the evening...She...is missing?" Jaci asked.

Logan wheeled on her angrily. "Lose the innocent act! We want to know where she is NOW!"

"We do not know," Roth stated.

"What has she done?" Feres asked.

"You know damned well what she's done!" Sheppard shouted.

"No, we don't," Feres argued.

"The children! She's taken the children and YOU all helped her do it!" Logan screamed in fury.

"The children? NO! None of us helped her...We were trying to make an alliance..."

"More like you were looking for a way to get to us," Sheppard countered.

"No," said Roth. "If she has done this, then she acted alone."

"She couldn't have acted alone! She couldn't have gotten all the children by herself!" Logan shouted.

"Then she was working with someone who isn't one of us!" Roth countered defensively.

"I should have known..." Feres muttered.

Both Logan and Sheppard jumped at that. "Should have known WHAT?!"

Feres looked fearfully at them. She knew well the reputation both held with the Genii. These were not ones to be trifled with. But, Vanu had seemed so sincere, so weary of the feud. She believed Vanu to be done with old grudges.

"SPEAK!" Sheppard shouted, making Feres jump.

"Vanu... She had reason to..." she trailed off, looking to her fellow Genii for support.

"WHAT?!" Logan demanded.

"I believed in her when she told me she held no grudges... Now it appears I was wrong."

"What grudge?" Sheppard asked.

"Vanu... She is a Mhott by marriage, but she is, by birth, a... Kolya."

ELSEWHERE IN THE GALAXY

Vanu kept watch over the two sleeping children. It hadn't been her intent to KEEP them, but now that she had them, she had no intention of parting with them. They owed her. Sheppard and Devane... They had taken her family from her and now she'd repaid them in kind. She smiled as she thought about how pleased her brothers would have been to know that she'd avenged them in such a way as to inflict the maximum amount of pain possible. She'd heard countless warnings about the Lanteans, Sheppard and Devane in particular, but she'd pulled off her vengeance without any problem and very little effort.

True, it had been hard to look at either one of them with a smile plastered upon her face, when what she'd truly wanted to do was take their lives the way they'd done to her brothers. But, this way was far more satisfying. They would suffer pain, for the rest of their lives, knowing that they'd lost their precious children as a result of their crimes against the Genii and the Kolya's in particular.

At first, she had toyed with the idea of executing the children, but quickly discarded that. It would be better to leave Sheppard and Logan agonizing over what specific fate had befallen them. Had she killed them, they would, at least, have closure. If they didn't know whether the children were alive or dead, or where they were, they would suffer a thousand times over. This was further sweetened by the knowledge that she could now mold the children into her own image of what they could and should be. They would grow up to hate and despise their parents, perhaps to one day FIGHT their parents, as the Genii did.

The oldest was two, still young enough that she would soon forget all about her parents. The boy was roughly a year younger than his sister, he would be even easier to mold. She wished that the two of them didn't look so much like their father, Sheppard, but she could live with it. They had not yet woken, but they would soon and she needed to move before they did. The Lanteans were no doubt awake by now, though still somewhat incapacitated by the gas she'd used. They would be coming after her, but they wouldn't find her. All they would have is the first world she gated to once she had all the children. She'd left there almost immediately after her arrival.

Once the gas had been released, and everyone incapacitated, it had been so easy to pluck the children, one by one, from their beds, laying them side by side in front of the gate and easing them through to the open arms waiting on the other side. The ease with which she'd accomplished this made her question, for the hundredth time, how her brothers had been taken down by such incompetent soldiers.

It mattered little now. She had avenged them. They could rest in peace. She and her husband would raise the Sheppard children as their own. Perhaps one day, those children would be the ones who finally take the lives of Sheppard and Devane. She dialed the gate and then picked up a sleeping child in each arm. This would be the fourth world she set foot on since leaving New Lantea. They would never find her, or the children, once they reached their final destination.

Hope lay very still, pretending to be asleep. She'd been extremely confused and very dizzy when she first woke up, and unable to control her arms or legs. She felt a bit stronger now, but she didn't want anyone to know that. She had no idea where she was, but once her head began to clear, her instincts and everything her parents had taught her began to kick in.

The first thing she needed was what Uncle John called "Intel." Information about who these people were and why they had taken her. Whatever the reason, she knew it couldn't be good. When she had gleaned enough to determine that they were scientists, Hope's blood ran cold. Her parents had warned her long ago that others would fear her, because of her lineage. Some would want to kill her outright, while others might want to conduct experiments on her. She was truly safe only with her Lantean people and the Athosians.

A little while later, she learned something new that nearly made her heart stop with fear and loathing. The scientists who had her were Genii! Enemies of her people second only to one - The Wraith. The visitors to New Lantea must have tricked them so they could get their hands on her... But what had they done to the others, to her parents, in order to get their hands on her? Both her parents would fight to the death to keep her safe. They were fierce warriors, not easily defeated. Perhaps they had been drugged somehow, like she had been?

"You can stop pretending now, little one," said a cold voice from across the room.

Hope took a deep breath and opened her eyes to find the man and woman staring at her intently. Her hands and feet were bound with strong ropes. As small as she was, they still feared her. This gave her a small amount of satisfaction. She sat up slowly and looked them both in the eye.

"Why have you taken me?" she asked.

They exchanged surprised looks. Her voice was much different than they'd expected.

"Actually, we didn't take you," the woman smiled. "You were more of a ... gift."

"A gift?" Hope asked, forcing herself to remain calm.

"We were told that a young Wraith child was found abandoned on another world. We offered to take you in."

"Out of the goodness of your hearts?" she sneered.

The two exchanged looks again. "You doubt our good intentions, young one?" The man said.

"Indeed. My parents would never abandon me, I was stolen."

"You give your kind far too much credit, little one," the woman said.

"My kind?"

"The Wraith are not known for their compassion, or their loyalty."

"My parents are not Wraith." Hope argued.

"Your lineage cannot be denied, though I confess it is barely detectable except to those who know what to look for. I wonder, young one, how it is that you appear so human," the man studied her face clinically.

Hope fought down a rising sense of panic. "What are you willing to do to learn the answer to that?" she asked.

"Whatever it takes," the man replied.

Hope shook her head and turned away, clutching the teddy bear her father had given her. At least she still had that. She would do whatever it took to hold onto it, for it was more valuable to her than they could know.

UNKNOWN PLANET I

"We are your Mama and Papa now," the woman said.

David Jackson didn't understand much, at his age, but he knew something was terribly wrong. "NO!" he said firmly.

The man looked at his wife and rubbed her back consolingly. They had lost their only child, a boy, just six months previously. This child, so bright and handsome, was a dream come true. There would be no more children born to them, due to complications from the birth of their own son. When they'd heard about the young orphaned boy, they knew it was fate that they should be the ones to take him.

"Don't worry, Kiyah. He is young; he will forget his first parents soon enough, and he will come to love us as much as we already love him."

"I know you are right, Haru. I guess I just did not expect to see such hostility in his eyes. He is so young for that."

"He may have seen the Wraith... take his parents..." Haru whispered so that the boy wouldn't hear him.

That thought nearly broke her heart and she instinctively moved to take the boy in her arms.

"NO!" David shouted again, backing away from them.

"Give it time, dear. He'll come around."

David kept looking around, hoping to catch sight of his parents, his friends, anyone familiar. This place was strange, these people were strange. He felt very unsafe. He wanted his parents, NOW. He reached down and picked up the teddy bear his father had given him and squeezed it tight. His father would come for him. Uncle John, Uncle Teal'c and Uncle Cam, too. They would find him and they would take him home. He wondered where his friends Riley and Chelsea were, and if they were as scared as he was.

UNKNOWN PLANET II

Riley Caldwell WAS scared, and every bit as alone as David Jackson was. Not only were her parents gone, but her older brothers were, too. Where was Hope? Hope always looked after her and David and Chelsea when their parents were away. She didn't know who these people were who were always trying to hold her, but she didn't want to have anything to do with them. She wanted Mama and Daddy. She wanted her brothers. Earlier she'd seen a woman outside who looked very much like her Aunt Logan, but when the woman turned around, she could see that it wasn't her. She began to cry, inconsolably, when she realized that there wasn't anyone here that she knew.

"She'll come around, Tais. She just needs time to recover from the death of her parents."

Tais looked at her husband. "I'm sure you are right. I wonder though, who is this Sam and Hope she asks for?"

"I don't know... Friends maybe?"

"She is so beautiful, Eagin. The daughter I always wanted... She WILL love us, won't she?"

"In time, dear...In time."

UNKNOWN PLANET III

Torus defiantly stared down the man holding him captive. He knew enough to keep his mouth shut about who he really was, though he wasn't sure what his kidnappers had already told the man about him. When he'd first awoken here, he'd almost panicked when he saw that his brother and sister weren't with him. Not because he wanted them in the same position, but because he somehow knew that each of them were alone. Riley would be terrified, and Sam would be scared, though he would do his best not to let it show. He'd promised his parents he would always watch out for them and he'd failed them.

He looked down at the chains binding his feet to the ground. They were strong. If he were going to make a break for it, he'd have to do it when they were moving him from his makeshift cell to the fields. He was still but a boy, but this man didn't care. All he wanted was someone to do the manual farm labor. He had several boys doing work around the farm, but Torus was the only one who needed to be chained up so he wouldn't run away.

When he'd first tried to run, upon waking, his "master" informed him that he would be meerciful the first time only. If he tried to run again, he'd been assured that the "master" would inflict far more punitive measures than simply chaining him up. He'd seen the scars on some of the other boys, so he had a pretty fair idea of what those punitive measures would be.

He knew his parents would be searching for him, but there was no telling how long it would take for them to track him down. He was sure his brother and sister had been taken as well, but they were far too young for farm labor - for any labor - so it was safe to assume that they were sent somewhere else, even to another world. The Genii were to blame for this. Those they had come to trust, against his father's better judgement, had betrayed them.

He would be patient for now. He would watch and learn the routine of the man who called himself his "master." He would find a way to escape and this time, he WOULD escape. Even if it were only long enough to send a message through the stargate. He forced himself to concentrate on the mission at hand, and not to think about what his siblings were going through. That would drive him crazy and it would make him reckless.

NEW LANTEA

"Yet you didn't see fit to inform us of this?" Weir glared angrily at Feres.

"You would not have let her be part of the negotiations," Feres said.

"With good reason!" Weir pointed out.

"Yes, I see that now. But I believed her when she said she wanted no part of the old ways... the old feuds... I believed she deserved a chance to show you that she could be trusted."

"And LOOK at what that decision has cost my people!"

"We never wished any harm on your people, Dr. Weir, I hope you can believe that. I am deeply sorry for the part I played in allowing this to happen. The others, they had no idea who Vanu really was. They are not to blame." Feres said sincerely.

Weir was already swimming in guilt, anger and fear. It was at her insistence that they'd even begun negotiations with the rebels in the first place. It had cost them dearly; a price none of them were willing to pay. It was one thing to put their own lives on the line to fight the Wraith - or any other enemy that might cross their path. It was another thing entirely to place the children at risk. She was glad she'd at least listened enough to go along with the idea of using this base as a cover instead of taking the rebels to Atlantis. The damage would have been... She shook her head, not wanting to even think about how it would have left them completely open to attack by the Genii. They wanted Atlantis at least as much as the Wraith did.

Caldwell had mobilized every available team in the galaxy to join in the search for the children. Their determination and anger was an awesome thing to behold. For the first time since meeting the Lanteans, the Genii rebels knew true fear of someone other than the Wraith. Yes, these people could be protective and generous, but they were swift to action when even one of their kind was threatened. Now one of them had incurred that wrath by stealing the most innocent among them: their children. Roth understood where they were coming from, having been in the military. He knew they would obliterate anyone who stood in the way of them retrieving their young - even if it meant wiping out the entire Genii population. Something he was sure they could have done long ago if they so chose.

He'd already known that Sheppard and Devane were a force to be reckoned with - they had quite a reputation among the Genii. But now he'd seen the same fire in the eyes of all of them. The eyes of the Athosian women, Kitah, Lyta and Teyla were as full of fire and retribution as the men. Some had expected them to dissolve into a puddle of grief and fear, but he knew the Athosians to be fierce warriors in their own right. They were not about to stand idly by while their men went out to search for their young. He blamed none of them for the hatred they felt toward his people. The Genii had unreasonably and unnecesarily taunted and attacked these people since the day they'd met. They continued to view them as the enemy, rather than embracing them as the powerful allies they could be and it had cost his people greatly. Many hundreds of Genii had been taken in the cullings as a result of their government's petty views regarding the Lanteans.

He'd offered his help, in trying to track down Vanu and the children, not that he expected them to accept it. He told them everything he knew about where Genii strongholds were located and how to avoid them. He'd all but begged to be taken along - unarmed, of course - but he didn't blame them for not trusting him after what Vanu had done. Whatever the outcome, Roth would be pledging his life and loyalty to the people of Lantea. If that meant remaining a prisoner for the rest of his life, so be it.


	52. Chapter 52

"They could be anywhere by now," Sheppard muttered angrily.

It was just as well that they'd left to begin the search immediately upon recovering full use of their limbs and faculties. If they hadn't, he felt reasonably sure that he would have killed every last one of the rebels himself, just as the others might have done - especially Teal'c. He took a moment to look around at the other teams who had assembled in record time to assist in the search. He allowed himself a brief moment to feel the sense of pride and kinship he held for all of them.

"We can't afford to miss anything," Caldwell said.

"No we can't," Sheppard agreed. "We have no way of knowing where she took them from here - how many planets she might have jumped trying to cover her tracks.."

Mitchell looked over at Logan, who was standing atop a rise about ten yards away. He knew she was barely holding it together, so she could find her children. White hot rage churned in his gut as he thought about all the missing children, most especially Chelsea and Nicolas. He loved those kids as if they were his own. It killed him to think about the pain Logan and Sheppard were feeling, not knowing where their children were, but knowing that the Genii were holding them.

"Logan?"

She started when he called to her. "Cam..."

"We'll find them," he assured her.

"I know. We HAVE to."

"I promise you... they WILL pay for this," he said.

She turned to look up at him, fire in her eyes. "I know that, too."

"Okay, Major Lorne and two teams will stay to search the planet by jumper. The rest of us will move on and spread out as necessary," Caldwell said.

"Understood," Sheppard said, motioning to Lorne to carry out the General's order.

"Let's move!" called Caldwell from his position at the gate.

Logan and Mitchell hurried down the rise and streaked through the gate. Lorne and the other teams piled into jumpers and split up to search the planet. Once the gate was clear, the ground seemed to open up and a young couple emerged from an underground tunnel. The man was carrying a vigorously squirming bundle in his arms. His hand had been clamped over the boys' mouth to prevent him from calling out to the ones who'd just left. He had to release his hold on the boy's mouth so he could dial the gate and the boy immediately started to scream.

"LET ME GO!" he screamed at them.

"You will not be harmed, boy, but it is not safe to remain here. Those people would harm all of us if we stayed," the man said.

"Those were my parents!" Sam yelled.

"You tell falsehoods, young one."

"My father will kill you for this!" Sam screamed again.

"Hush boy!" the man snapped as the gate activated.

Sam started squirming even more, kicking and trying to flail his arms, desperately trying to free himself from the man's grasp. In the distance, he could see one of the jumpers turn and head back toward the gate just as the wormhole engaged. They must have seen it.

"Let me go!" he landed one hard kick squarely on the man's shin, causing him to stumble and fall to one knee.

He instinctively let go of the boy to catch himself as he fell and Sam took full advantage of the opportunity to escape. He ran toward the apporaching jumper as fast as he could, but the man caught up to him and lifted him off his feet. Throwing the boy over his shoulder, he held his legs tightly to keep him from kicking him again. Sam rained ineffectual blows across the man's back but it wasn't enough to make him let go.

"NOOOOO!" he cried as they crossed the event horizon before the jumper could reach them.

UNKNOWN PLANET

"They have taught her well, for one so young," he observed.

"She does seem very protective of him, doesn't she?" Vanu smiled in amusement.

"See the way she holds him, though she is scarcely older than he is?" Mertahn asked.

"Indeed. It is rather charming," she admitted.

"You have put us in great danger, Vanu."

"You have always wanted a son, husband, now you have one. And a daughter."

"Yes. I wonder, did you stop to think about what kind of life we can give them? We will be hunted across the galaxy."

"They will never find us. Do you disagree with what I have done? You hate them as well, do you not?" Vanu asked.

"I do, mostly for the pain they have caused you. I will support you, Vanu, and I will raise these as my own, but my eyes are wide open. Our life will not be as easy as you imagine."

Vanu smiled arrogantly. "The ease with which I obtained the children tells me otherwise, Mertahn. They are not nearly as formidable as we have been led to believe."

"Perhaps. But you caught them unawares. They will not make the same mistakes again," he warned her.

"You worry overmuch."

"I think not, wife, but we are now in this together and we will make the best of it. They are indeed fair children, and appear to be quite bright for tiny ones. They will make a fine addition to our family."

"I thought you would be pleased," she smiled. "Come, let us begin schooling them in our ways. The girl must be taught obedience first."

Vanu crossed the room and Chelsea instinctively tightened her grasp around her baby brother. "NO!" she said defiantly, glaring at the woman.

"You will learn your place, girl. One way or another," Vanu smiled.

UNKNOWN PLANET II

Hope rubbed her arm where they had pricked her with a needle to take her blood for testing. She wondered how much they would take before she had none left to give. She couldn't remember ever feeling so... angry... before. She resented feeling so helpless. She'd thought she might have a chance to escape once they turned their backs for long enough, but these people were not about to trust anyone with Wraith blood in them, no matter how small the amount. They kept her tied up always, whether they were present or not. It gave her a small amoutn of satisfaction to instill even a little fear in them, as they had done to her. Hope looked longingly at the window across the room. If only she could get free of the ropes that bound her.

"Very interesting indeed," the woman murmured as she turned toward Hope. "You are definitely more human than Wraith."

"I know," Hope replied disdainfully.

"Do you know also how this came to be?" she asked.

"No."

"A pity. It would make my work so much easier... On the both of us," she said pointedly.

"When my parents come for me you will wish you never laid eyes on me."

"I told you, little one, your parents won't be coming for you; they are dead."

"I do not believe you."

"I do not _care_ if you believe me or not. You will never leave this place."

Hope turned away, trying not to lose faith. Her parents WOULD come. She knew it down deep in her soul. Her father's anger would be a force to behold, as would her mothers'. These people would not know what hit them when her parents found them.

K3R-472

Lorne dialed the coordinates they'd seen on the DHD before the couple disappeared through the wormhole with Samuel Caldwell. He couldn't afford to stop even long enough to send a message to Weir or Caldwell. Not if he wanted to catch up to the boy before they could disappear to yet another world. He drove the jumper through the gate and immediately began scanning for life signs as soon as they cleared the other side.

His efforts were rewarded when they got a solid lock on three life forms in close proximity to the gate. As soon as the wormhole shut down, he had Fowler dial the gate to prevent them from escaping to anywhere other than where THEY wanted the three to go. If they bolted for the gate, they would wind up right at the search team's front door. The couple stayed hidden in the thick brush near the stargate, hoping that would provide them enough cover to elude their pursuers.

"I TOLD you!" Sam said victoriously.

"Who are you... really?" the man asked.

"Sam," he replied.

"What is your homeworld, boy?" the man demanded.

Sam kept his mouth shut, knowing it was important for him to keep quiet about where he was from.

"Where are you from?" the man shouted.

"I won't tell you anything!" Sam shouted defiantly.

"I have seen those ships before..."

"Where?" asked the woman.

"They are Lantean," he informed her.

They looked again at Sam, the horror of their situation dawning on them.

"You are... Lantean?" asked the woman.

Sam still refused to answer, but struggled to bite back a smile.

"We are deceived!" the man said. "This is no mere orphan... Vanu has deceived and betrayed us!"

"Why?"

"The two she kept with her... She must have known they would come after her. The others... they were a ruse... a smokescreen to buy her time to escape and hide!"

"What do we do?" she asked, clearly terrified now.

"We let him go... Maybe that is all they want... Maybe they will simply take him and go."

Sam smiled. "Don't bet on it," he muttered under his breath.

The man released him but Sam, instead of running away, merely walked a few leisurely paces away and waited. He saw the jumper land at the edge of the brush and began waving his arms around to catch their attention. The man and woman watched him in horror, realizing what he was trying to do. It didn't take Lorne and his men long to reach the boy, who was all too happy to be swept safely into Lorne's strong arms. He immediately pointed to where the couple was hiding and the chase was on. Lorne's team easily caught up and cornered them.

"We didn't know!" the woman screamed.

"We were deceived!" the man said.

"We had no idea he was Lantean... We were told his parents were dead..."

Lorne ordered them bound and taken back to the jumper.

"Where's my dad?" Sam asked.

"He's out looking for you and your brother and sister," Lorne told him.

"They were stolen too?" Sam gasped, horrified.

"I'm afraid so, buddy. But we're gonna find them, just like we found you. Is it true what they said about being lied to?"

"I dunno... They were talking about someone named Vanu and they did say that she lied to them so she could get away with two others... Does she have my brother and sister?"

"I'm not sure, buddy... She took David, Hope, Chelsea, Nic, Torus and Riley, too."

"Why?" he asked sadly.

"I don't know, buddy. I guess she wanted to hurt your parents and taking all you kids was the best way for her to do that."

"She didn't hurt them, did she? She didn't shoot them or anything?" he asked fearfully.

"No! No, not at all, Sam. They're all fine... They're just missing you guys, so let's hurry up and get you back, shall we?"

"Yes sir," Sam grinned and wrapped his arms around Lorne's neck.

K3R-472

"Say again?" Caldwell blinked down at his wife.

"I said we have Sam here, General. Major Lorne was able to retrieve him not long after you left the first planet you were on. He's safe and Dr. Beckett is checking him out as we speak."

Lyta hugged her husband as she listened to the news from New Lantea.

"That's good news... He is... He's okay, right?" Caldwell asked.

"He seems just fine, General. He's a very brave boy," Weir smiled.

"Yes... He is. Thank you Doctor. Please... Please explain to him why we can't come back just yet?" Caldwell asked.

"He understands. He knows his brother and sister are still out there and he wants you and Lyta to bring them home," Weir informed them.

"We will... Tell him we will... And that we love him," Lyta told her.

"Will do. Weir out."

Caldwell gave his wife one more squeeze and then turned to face the others. His relieved smile was short lived as his mind centered on the two children he still had out there, as well as the other three still missing.

"One down, five more to go," Logan nodded.

"Right. And we _will_ bring them home... ALL of them."

"Where to now, sir?" Sheppard asked anxiously.

"We need to finish the search here... Talk to everyone we can find and then root out the ones we can't see. Split up into teams of two and cover every inch of this place."

UNKNOWN PLANET

Hope kept a careful eye on her captors through the window as she quietly extricated herself from the chains that bound her. Once she'd been able to grab some of the paper from the table, she'd made quick work of chewing it up and pressing it into the locking mechanism on the chains. It worked almost as well as the chewing gum her father snuck her occasionally. And it kept the lock from clasping. Once free of her restraints, she grabbed her teddy bear and silently crept out the back door.

She stayed low to the ground and close to the surrounding vegetation and soon made her way to the stargate. She waited a while to make sure no one else was around and then ran for the DHD. She dialed as fast as she could while still keeping an eye out for anyone who might be close by. She was very near tears when the wormhole engaged and she ran for the event horizon.

Suddenly, out of no where, a man streaked out of the trees and tried to block her way. Hope gave her bear one good squeeze and darted out of the man's grasp. But, just as she neared the gate, he caught her by the foot and held on tight, causing her to trip and fall face forward. Her bear flew from her grasp and into the event horizon. Hope kicked and twisted, pummeling the man with all her might, but he did not release his grasp on her. She looked back in dismay as the wormhole disengaged, finally surrendering to the tears that had been threatening to come for days.

Alarms were blaring in New Lantea as a small teddy bear came flying through the now open gate. The signal had been unmistakeable. Weir hurried across the room when the gate shut down and picked up the furry traveler. She looked bleakly over at the control room.

"Did you get it?" she asked.

"Yes ma'am, we got it!" came the ecstatic reply.

"Let's get ahold of Teal'c and Teyla now!" she ordered, hugging the bear to her. "Hold on Hope."

"Are you certain?" came Teyla's anxious question.

"It's hers alright. She probably couldn't get to the gate herself and tossed it through to help us find her."

"We are on our way," Teal'c said grimly.

When the gate shut down, Teal'c dialed the new coordinates and they all rushed through, weapons drawn and ready.

Hope had been dragged back to the lab, kicking and screaming the entire time. They finally gagged her and were preparing to inject her with a sedative when Teal'c kicked in the door. His face was a mask of anger as he took in the sight before him.

"Release her!" he ordered.

The two held their ground, unwilling or unable to move.

"Release her or I will kill you where you stand!" he growled menacingly.

The man released his grip on Hope and stepped back a pace, his eyes wide with fear.

"Step away," Teyla shouted, an equally murderous expression on her face.

"Don't you know what she IS?" the woman asked.

Teyla leveled an angry gaze at her. "She... is our daughter, and we have come to take her home!"

"Your daughter!" the woman looked disgusted.

"She is Wraith... An abomination..."

"Be silent woman!" Teal'c ordered.

Teyla moved forward and began to undo the chains that bound her daughter. As she removed the gag from Hope's mouth, Hope let out a mournful wail.

"Mama!" she cried, throwing her arms around Teyla.

Suddenly, the man lunged for Teyla and Hope, a dagger in his hand. Before he could reach them, Teal'c brought him down with a single shot to the head, then pointed his gun at the woman.

"You KILLED him!" she cried. "Over a WRAITH?!"

"And I will do the same to you if you, too, fail to cooperate." he warned.

Teyla lifted Hope in her arms and carried her out of the room, Lyta following her.

"Where are the other children?" Teal'c asked.

"What children?" she replied.

"Those who were stolen along with my daughter," he said.

"More Wraith?" she asked.

"No," Caldwell said, stepping in.

"I have no idea what you're talking about. That one was the only child we were offered..."

"For the purpose of?" Caldwell asked.

"Experimentation," Logan hissed angrily, pointing out the contents of the room.

"You conducted experiments on my daughter?" Teal'c asked, anger clouding his face again.

"We were told she was orphaned... Abandoned by her kind..."

"Told by whom?" Caldwell asked.

"One called Vanu. She mentioned no other children. You have your Wraith spawn - Now take it and GO!" she yelled.

"Tread softly woman, for I would just as soon shoot you than hear your wretched voice. Do not expect that we will simply leave you here after what you have done!" Teal'c shouted at her.

Caldwell called for restraints and had the woman bound for transport back to New Lantea. There she would face tougher interrogation than they had time for here.

Teyla accompanied Hope back to New Lantea where she could be examined by Beckett and made to feel safe again. Teal'c held her for a few moments before letting her go with her mother, just to assure himself that she was truly okay. Once they were safely away he turned his attention back to the search for the other children.

The others had already begun turning the village upside down in an effort to find the still missing children, or at least some clue to where they might be. Sheppard found Logan sitting on a boulder just outside the edge of the village. She was staring off into the distance. He called out her name, but she didn't appear to hear him. He reached out and touched her on the shoulder, causing her to jump about a foot off the boulder.

"Hey, easy Sparks, it's just me..." he cooed.

Logan buried her face in his chest and took a few deep breaths. Sheppard wrapped his arms securely around her and simply held her. He knew all of her unspoken fears, and shared every one of them.

"They aren't doing that to Nic or Chels, baby... They only did it to Hope because of her Wraith blood."

Logan nodded but didn't say anything.

"We'll find them, Sparks, I promise you."

"I know, John... And when we do... Just promise me you won't stop me from killing that b*tch!" she said fiercely.

Sheppard looked down at her, hate and fear and anger in her eyes. It tore further at his already anguished heart to see her this way.

"I won't stop you," he promised.

"I won't either," Caldwell said from behind them.

Logan turned to face him, seeing the same feelings mirrored in his eyes for his own children. Before she could say anything, a woman came running down the path toward them. They watched her approach, guns drawn and raised, until she stopped before them.

"Please... I want to help," she said.

"Help how?" Caldwell demanded.

"I have...information..."

"What kind of information?" Sheppard asked.

"My husband and I... we were approached by someone offering orphaned children..." she said.

"Someone?" Caldwell prodded.

"I... it didn't sound right to me, so we... turned her down."

"Her? It was a woman?" Logan asked.

"Yes... Her name was Fauni. She said her friend worked with orphaned children, to help them find homes."

"And you didn't believe her?" Caldwell asked.

"It wasn't just that... She seemed... strange, somehow... Almost afraid and too eager."

"Where is this Fauni now?" Logan asked.

"She is not of this world, but I will give you the address of where we met her. I... I hope this helps you find your children..."

UNKNOWN PLANET

Torus looked into the eyes of the fourth boy who approached him in two days. They all wanted their freedom as much as he did! He had to wonder, however, if he was being set up. He really had no way of knowing whether or not any of them could be trusted. They COULD be Genii, for all he knew. He hadn't told them yet, about the plan he was working on, just in case any of them were spying on him for Farmer Butthead, as Torus affectionately referred to him.

In all fairness to the other boys, however, the ruthless farmer treated them at least as badly as he treated Torus, so he'd decided to err on the side of hope rather than caution. Once he had a definite plan worked out, he would begin to bring the other boys in on it.

UNKNOWN PLANET II

Young David was faring much better than his parents dared to hope. The couple who took him in already loved and cherished him after only a few days. David, of course, was not buying into it, he simply wanted his real parents back, but these people were nice enough, and they treated him like a prince. There was nothing he could do for himself but sit and wait for his parents to come and get him.

UNKNOWN PLANET III

Eagin smiled through the doorway at the sight of Tais rocking the sleeping child. She was indeed a beautiful girl, and would only grow more beautiful each day. At heart, she was a sweet child, though she cried often and could throw one whopper of a tantrum when she wanted to. Usually when one of them tried to explain that her parents were gone and would not be coming back, or if they tried to take her stuffed teddy, as she called it, away from her.

Tais had gotten a little better at changing the subject rather than trying to push the matter. She would come around in time, and come to love them as her new parents. They just needed to be patient. He was a bit concerned about the little information they'd been able to get from her. They knew her name was Riley and that someone, presumably her father, had been a military man somewhere - a General, she'd said.

She continued to insist that she had not one, but two brothers and an Uncle (they assumed that was what she meant by "Unca") named Shep, who was apparently very good with guns. It was this Uncle who gave him pause, rather than her father, whom he knew to be deceased. If this Uncle decided that he wanted to raise his niece after all, he might be forced to fight for the child. He was no military man, by any means, but he would fight anyone who tried to take the child from them, Uncle or no. He was confused about the brothers she mentioned, as well. He'd been led to believe that Riley had no family left. Perhaps she had brothers at one point but had lost them in addition to her parents. It did not even occur to him that he and Tais had been misled about her situation.


	53. Chapter 53

"Shouldn't we have been able to pick up a signal by now?" Sheppard asked.

It had been nearly a week since the children were stolen and they had only recovered Sam and Hope so far. Hope's beacon was the only one to have been activated in all this time, which did not bode well for the other children. The younger ones may not have correctly activated their beacons, due to their age and inexperience, but Torus should have been able to activate his. This was all assuming, of course, that the items containing the covert homing devices hadn't been taken from the children when they were abducted. Hope's hadn't, obviously, and Sam had forgotten to put his (located in the chain he wore around his neck) back on after bathing the night they were stolen, but what of the others? Had their teddy bears been taken away from them? Was that why they were unable to pick up any signal from their devices? Nik was far too young to understand the directive they gave to all of the Atlantis children, but Chelsea understood, as did David and Riley. The three of them were never without their Teddy Bears no matter where they went.

The search party stopped when Kitah suddenly gasped and nearly fell to the ground. Mitchell was closest to her and reached out to catch her before she could fall, easing her gently to the ground while Daniel made his way back to his wife.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"I...there is a pain..." she winced.

Logan moved in to check her vital signs and examine her. "Where Kitah?"

"Here," she pointed to her lower abdomen. "I... already know..."

"Know what?" Daniel asked.

"I am sorry, Daniel... I wanted to wait for a happier time to tell you..."

Logan gasped in realization. "Kitah... Are you..."

"With child...yes..." she nodded.

Daniel's eyes widened. "What?!" he asked.

"Dr. Beckett confirmed it the day the children were taken..." she winced.

"Why didn't you tell me? You shouldn't be traipsing around out here in your condition!" Daniel scolded mildly, ecstatic and worried at the same time.

"That is why I did not tell you. I needed to find our son... I wanted you to be focused on him, not me," she explained.

"Kitah..." Daniel shook his head. He understood, but he was not happy that she'd put her life at risk, or their unborn baby's life at risk. "You have to go back."

"No...I will be fine..."

"NO!" Caldwell and Logan said in unison.

"Kitah, you aren't doing David or your unborn child any good if you put yourself at risk. Daniel won't be able to focus if he is worried about you - He can do that if he knows you're safe and in Dr. Beckett's capable hands." Logan informed her.

"I would feel better if you were there to look after Sam," added Lyta.

"And Hope," Teyla chimed in.

At first, Kitah looked like she would argue the point, but she sighed and then nodded her head. "Very well," she agreed.

"Dr. Jackson, make sure your wife gets back through the gate and then you can rejoin the search," Caldwell ordered.

They watched as Daniel lifted his wife off the ground and carried her back to the stargate, then continued on their way.

UNKNOWN PLANET

"David, we have decided to give you back your... Teddy... since it gives you comfort, but please, do not try to run away again. It is not safe out there... the Wraith could attack at any moment."

"Roddy!" David squealed. His eyes lit up as the man held out the bear he'd been given long before he could even remember. He didn't know why, exactly, but he knew all he had to do was give the bear a big squeeze in just the right place and his parents would come for him.

He grabbed the bear and ran for the room they had given him, squeezing as hard as he could. They exchanged curious glances, wondering what it was that so enamored him of the stuffed toy. He was so fond of the thing that he would do anything, obey any command they gave him as long as they did not take his toy away from him.

ELSEWHERE

"I've got something!" McKay declared.

"What?!" Caldwell said as they all crowded around McKay.

"It's faint, but it's definitely there..."

"Who?" Teal'c asked.

"It's uh... David's beacon..."

"David?" Daniel asked hopefully, having returned just as McKay made his announcement.

"It's David alright, see?" He held the screen up for Daniel to see.

"Have you got a fix?" Caldwell asked.

"It's coming from...Here?!" he looked perplexed.

They'd already covered most of the planet's villages and towns but had found no sign of the woman they were looking for or any of the children.

"Underground?" Sheppard speculated.

"Lock it in, McKay... Let's go get him!" Caldwell ordered.

Between themselves on the surface and the jumpers in the air, they were able to triangulate the location of David Jackson's beacon. A small home on the outskirts of a fairly large village. Within moments, they had the home surrounded and waited for Caldwell to give the order to storm the place. Once he had confirmation that there were only three people inside, including David, Caldwell gave the order.

Logan and Sheppard burst through the front door, while the others came in through every opening they could find. The woman rushed to another room and snatched the boy from his bed, holding him tightly against her in a protective stance.

"Who are you?"!" the man demanded.

"You first!" Sheppard shouted.

"I will tell you nothing. This is MY home!"

Daniel stepped forward and pointed to the boy. "And that, is my son."

Upon hearing his voice, David began to squirm, trying in vain to see his father. "Daddy!" he cried.

"It's alright son, we're here to take you home," Daniel smiled at him reassuringly.

"Daddy... I brave..." he cried.

"I know, David... Mama knows, too."

"Where Mama?" he asked.

"She is back home watching over Hope and Sam, and waiting for you," Daniel replied.

"Hope... Sam... Where Chessie and Riwey?" he asked.

Daniel looked into the eyes of the woman who still refused to let go of his son. "Please... Let him go..."

She stood her ground, shaking her head. "No... No... He is ours now."

"You heard him...*I* am his father."

"She say Daddy dead... Mama, too!" David said petulantly.

"You told my son we were dead?" Daniel's eyes darkened with anger.

"My God..." Logan murmured, horrified.

"That is unbelievably cruel," Teyla said.

The man took a step forward and held up a hand. "That is what we were told."

"I'll bet!" Caldwell said.

"Give me my son!" Daniel ordered.

"Give Daddy!" David echoed, twisting around and reaching out for his father.

The woman looked at her husband who nodded somberly. "But... we..."

She reluctantly set David down and he immediately rushed into Daniels' arms and burrowed his face in between Daniel's neck and shoulder. Daniel struggled to hold back tears as he clung to his son. He pulled back to look the boy over, just to make sure he was okay.

"Auntie Lolo!" David squealed as he caught sight of her behind Daniel.

"Hi squirt!" she smiled, holding her arms out to him. "Come, let me have a look at you."

"'Kay!" he agreed readily, knowing he was as safe with Logan as he was with his father.

Logan took him and walked outside, followed by Daniel, who held him while Logan checked him over to make sure he wasn't injured or ill.

"We were told he was... orphaned..." the woman cried. "We loved him... as we would have our own..."

Caldwell studied her intently. He believed she was telling the truth, but he was still angry. "If you are really victims, as we all were when the children were stolen from us, then you will help us find the person who did this - and the rest of our children."

"Children? There were more than one?" the man asked.

"Yes... There were several taken, my own included. Tell us where you got the boy."

Haru reluctantly told them everything he knew, while Kiyah softly wept in the corner. She kept stealing longing glances out the window at Daniel and David. Logan had come back inside, after thoroughly checking David over, and was now watching Kiyah to make sure she didn't do anything stupid. At her wits end, the woman suddenly snapped at Logan.

"You have no idea...You don't know what it's like to lose a child..."

Logans' eyes blazed angrily. "And you don't know what you're talking about!"

Mitchell moved to stand behind Logan, whispering in her ear in an effort to calm her.

"What would you know about it?"

"I have TWO children who were stolen by that woman and they are still out there somewhere, so don't speak of things YOU know nothing about!"

Kiyah looked somehwat mortified at what she'd been told, but she was still too grief-stricken to sympathize. "She probably took them for good reason! She knew they were going to loving homes and families..."

Logan wheeled angrily on her. "ALL of our children HAD good homes, with loving parents, you self-righteous b*tch!"

Mitchell wrapped his arm around her waist from behind and pulled her away, knowing that the two women would soon come to blows, and that Logan would wipe the floor with the other woman.

"Easy, Lo...Come on...That's it...Let's go find John..."

Teyla moved in to take Logan's place watching Kiyah, though she looked about as happy about it as Logan had been. Caldwell watched their exchange dispassionately. Had the woman continued to push things, Caldwell couldn't and wouldn't have blamed Logan for losing the tenuous control she had over her emotions already. He should, as her C.O. but he wanted to beat the truth out of these people just as much as she did.

"What?" Caldwell said, returning his attention to Haru.

"The woman you seek... She is here. Not three homes down the way."

"You're sure?" he asked.

"Very. We were planning on having her for evening meal to thank her, again, for bringing us the boy..." he said sadly.

"Show us." Caldwell ordered icily.

She stood at the window watching for an opportunity to make her escape. There were so many of them! Even when she agreed to help Vanu, she'd been afraid that something like this would happen, despite Vanu's assurances that it would not. She'd done this because of her devotion to Acastus Kolya. She'd been in love with him for as long as she could remember, and though he had never really returned her feelings, she remained devoted to him to this day.

The people whose children they'd taken were all responsible, in some way or another, for the death of Acastus and his brother. She agreed that they had to pay for what they'd done, and like Vanu, she agreed that taking their precious children would be the best, most painful way to exact vengeance. Acastus would approve, she believed, and that was what had made her follow through with the plan.

Now THEY were here, and she had no doubt that they now knew about her involvement. Haru and Kiyah would most certainly have told them where they got the boy and her life would be forfeit. At least Vanu had gotten away with the Sheppard children. No matter how much they tortured her, she would not, indeed COULD not tell them where to find Vanu. Sheppard and Devane would never get their children back, even if the others did. They, at least, would suffer for the rest of their lives.

There was no way she'd be able to escape from them. There were far too many, and they were angry. She let out a heavy sigh and accepted her fate. She was comforted by the fact that she would soon be with her beloved Acastus. She let the curtain fall back in place and went to sit in the bedroom and await her inevitable fate. She hoped that both Sheppard and Devane were with those at Haru's home. she wanted to see the pain in their eyes before she died. She wanted to be able to give Acastus at least some measure of peace in the next life. She didn't have long to wait. Soon enough there were bodies converging on her from every corner of the room. She simply sat there and waited for someone, preferably Sheppard or Devane, to speak first.

"You are the one called Fauni?" Caldwell demanded.

She regarded him icily. "I am."

"You are the one who helped Vanu steal our children?" he asked.

"I am."

"Where are the rest of them?"

"I will tell you nothing."

A man, who could only be Sheppard stepped forward and stared hatefully down at her. She knew he was Sheppard before he opened his mouth. His children bore a striking resemblance to him. "You WILL tell us where the children are, one way or another," he seethed.

She smirked up at him. "You are Sheppard."

"I am."

"And which is Devane?" she asked, looking at the two women behind him.

Logan stepped forward. "I am," she identified herself.

"You two... You will suffer the most."

"We aren't the only ones who have missing children," Sheppard said.

"No you are not, though I have no doubt that the others will be found more easily. But, I should tell you that no matter what form of torture you employ, I will not reveal the whereabouts of _your_ son and daughter."

"Just ours?" Sheppard asked.

"That is correct."

"Why?" asked Caldwell.

"These two, more than any of you are responsible for the deaths of the Kolya brothers."

"What are you? Another sister? A cousin?" Logan asked coldly.

"Neither. But you will pay for what you did to them... To Acastus..." she trailed off sadly.

"Ah... You were in love with him," Logan deduced.

"Indeed. And now he has been avenged, as has his brother."

"So it would be news to you that Kolya was in love with my wife?" Sheppard taunted her.

Fauni's eyes flashed angrily. "Never! Not Acastus..."

"Oh yes. Very much so." Sheppard countered.

"And for this you killed him?!" she was outraged.

"Actually, that was me," McKay stepped forward.

"You?" she stared at him in disbelief.

"Yeah... He was about to kill Colonel Devane, among others, and someone had to stop him. Fortunately, I don't have any children for you to kidnap, but I happen to hold the missing children very dear."

"I will tell you _nothing_!" she screamed.

"We'll see about that," Caldwell reached out and pulled her roughly to her feet.

Fauni was taken to the kitchen and bound securely to a chair. They didn't have the time nor the inclination for niceties, and he knew that his superiors would be horrified at what they were planning to do, but he really didn't give a damn. When the woman was secure, he sent the others out of the room and called for Logan. He spoke with her in hushed tones, and the woman noticed that Devane's eyes sparkled just a bit at whatever he told her. She took a deep breath and waited for the torture to begin.

Logan rummaged around in her medical bag and pulled out a smaller bag. Inside the smaller bag was a dark blue plastic case containing hypodermic needles, syringes and a vial of some type of liquid. Fauni watched as Logan methodically filled the syringe and turned toward her. Caldwell took up a position directly behind her, pressing down on her shoulders to keep her from trying to stand. Since her arms and legs were already bound, it was easy for Logan to find a vein and she wasted no time injecting the drug into her system.

Outside, Mitchell was pacing back and forth with Sheppard, wanting desperately to go back inside. "Do you know what they're doing?" he asked Sheppard.

"I have a pretty good idea," he shrugged, wanting to be part of it as well.

"Sodium Pentothal?" Mitchell asked.

"Probably. Either that or Caldwell is letting Logan beat the shit out of her," Sheppard said grimly.

Mitchell studied his face. "I doubt that... I don't think that'd work on her, in fact I think she'd welcome it. Plus, I don't hear any screaming."

"I got that feeling, too. Like she can't wait to be with her beloved Kolya," he looked disgusted as he said it.

"We'll find them John. I promise, I'll never stop looking until we do."

Sheppard gave a half-hearted smile and shrugged. "Thanks Cam... I know you will."

"What is it man?" Mitchell asked.

"That woman, she made it sound like... I don't think she knows where Nic and Chelsea are," he admitted breathlessly.

"We WILL find them John... No matter what."

Inside the house, the drug was beginning to take effect. Fauni felt herself relaxing despite the immediate peril she was in. "What... What was that?" she asked blearily.

"A little something we call truth-serum," Caldwell answered icily.

"I won't help you," she persisted.

"Ah, but you will... Not intentionally of course, or willingly, but you _will_ answer our questions."

Caldwell spent about fifteen minutes interrogating the woman who, despite her best efforts to fight the drug, could not seem to resist answering each and every one of his questions. She gave him the names and locations of every person who had taken in a Lantean child, seeming to revel in the fact that she had managed to cause them so much pain. The one thing she wouldn't tell them was the location of the Sheppard children.

Logan was rapidly losing control. "Tell me where my children are!" she shouted.

"I cannot... Even if I wanted to, I could not."

"Why is that?" Logan asked.

"We knew you would come looking for them. Vanu really didn't care whether or not you found the others, they were but a diversion, meant to cause you maximum pain, but..."

"But what?" Logan stared directly into her eyes.

"The only children she never wanted found were yours... She... WE wanted you to suffer for the rest of your lives wondering what happened to them. For this reason, Vanu never told me where she took them, or who she gave them to... Or even if she planned to keep them alive..."

Logan impulsively slapped her then kicked the chair over. Caldwell hurriedly grabbed her from behind to keep her from beating the life out of the hateful woman laughing up at her from the floor. Logan was screaming and flailing around, trying to break free from Caldwell's grasp. Mitchell and Sheppard charged into the room at the sound of Logan's screams.

"Take her!" Caldwell ordered.

Sheppard and Mitchell wrestled Logan out the door and away from prying eyes. For a few moments she fought them, trying to get back inside. Sheppard whispered and cooed to her, trying to soothe her anger. Eventually, she began to calm, or rather to stop fighting, and she slumped to the gound, dissolving into tears.

"What happened?" Sheppard asked.

"She... told us where the other children are..." Logan gasped.

"Nic? Chels?" Sheppard asked.

"Johnny... She doesn't KNOW where they are... or if they're even alive!" she wailed.

"What?!" he gasped.

"That was their intent all along. They never wanted us to know what happened to them... Just OURS..." she sobbed.

NEW LANTEA

Daniel escorted David back to New Lantea, along with a few S.O.'s who were bringing the woman called Fauni for further questioning. Daniel smiled as he entered the infirmary to find his wife resting safely under the care of Dr. Beckett. Kitah looked up when he entered and very nearly jumped right out of bed when she saw her son cradled in Daniels' arms.

"David!" she cried, holding out her arms to him.

"Mama!" David squealed, nearly launching himself onto the bed.

Daniel deposited the squirming child on the bed and leaned down to kiss his wife, then stood back to watch the joyful reunion. Beckett came over and placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"How are they?" he asked.

"Mum and bairn are both fine. Kitah was a bit dehydrated, but we've remedied that. I assume Logan examined young David before you came back?"

"Yeah, she checked him over," he said, an intense wave of sadness coming over him.

"What's wrong?" Beckett asked.

Daniel pulled him aside, out of earshot of Kitah and David. "The woman who came back with us, Fauni... She told them where to find the other children..."

"That's great!" Beckett exclaimed.

"EXCEPT... for Nic and Chelsea," he finished.

"What? Why?"

"She doesn't know where Vanu took them, or if she even kept them alive. She wanted John and Logan to suffer more than the rest of us, I guess."

"That's just... unspeakably cruel..." Beckett said angrily.

"Yeah..."

"How are they holding up?" Beckett asked.

"Not very well. They have each other, so that's some comfort, but... Logan started losing it when she found out what they planned for her kids. She's okay now. As okay as she _can_ be under the circumstances but..." Daniel trailed off.

"Her military training will keep her from losing it completely... At least until they find the children."

"Daniel?" Kitah called to him.

"Yes?" he was instantly at her side.

"Where Chessie and Riwey?" David asked.

Kitah stiffened at the expression on Daniels' face.

"They're still away, son. Remember? Aunt Logan and Uncle John are still out looking for them."

David looked around the room again. "Where Nic?"

"He's with Chelsea, son."

"Lolo sad?" he asked.

"Yes David, she's very sad."

The boy appeared to be deep in thought, then he suddenly thrust his teddy bear into Daniels' hands. "Give Lolo," he said simply.

"That's very generous of you, son. But Aunt Logan wants you to hold onto this, so she knows that YOU are safe."

"Where Sam?" he asked.

At that moment, Sam burst into the room. "Hi!" he said cheerily.

David reached out his arms to the older boy. "Sam!"

Sam hugged the boy and turned to look up at Daniel. "The others?" he asked.

"Not yet, but your Dad knows where your brother and sister are and he's gone to get them," Daniel assured him.

"Good. What about Nic and Chelsea?" he asked warily.

"They're still looking, but they'll find them," he assured everyone present. "Speaking of which... I need to get back."

Kitah started a bit, but said nothing. Daniel looked down at her, determination in his brilliant blue eyes. "We have our son back, Kitah... But..."

Kitah held up a hand to stop him. "Go Daniel..." she said firmly.

"I'll be back," he promised.

He kissed David and Kitah, then gave Sam a reassuring hug and promised to tell his parents that he was fine. As he was leaving, Weir was coming in with Hope. He stopped long enough to hug the girl and told Weir that Beckett would fill her in.

UNKNOWN PLANET

Torus looked disbelievingly at the boy called Runer. Runer had wakened him after sneaking into his cell and held up the bracelet his parents had given him long ago. His bracelet! His salvation! He reached out tentatively and took it from Runer and quickly hit the tiny button that would activate the beacon. Then he turned to look into Runers' eyes. "Why did you do this?" he asked.

"I want to be free too... The master... he is..." Runer shuddered and almost gave in to tears.

Torus reached over and placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "The others?" he asked.

"They are still sleeping. It is very late, the master will not be up for hours."

"He is no one's master anymore," Torus assured him.

"We will go now?"

"We go now," Torus said.

The two boys made their way silently to the cells containing their fellow conspirators. Only the ones he knew he could trust. He had every intention of freing the others, but not until he was sure he and his friends were safe. His father could free them, once all the Lantean children were safe and back home. He felt a tug at his heart at the mere thought of his brother, sister and friends all being subjected to what he'd been through. Yes, they were too young for the manual labor he'd been forced to do, but they could be being groomed for such work in the future.

Once all his friends were free, Torus led them away from the farm and toward town. He was unfamiliar with this world, but the other boys had drawn detailed maps of the area outside the farm and where the stargate was located. He knew his brother and sister were not brought to the same world as he, or rather he'd been told as much. He wanted to go off and search for them, but he knew his parents wouldn't want him to go off traipsing around the galaxy alone. As much as it pained him, he knew he had to go back to New Lantea.

As the group made their way silently into town, hiding behind the houses as they went, some movement caught his eye and he ordered the boys to flatten themselves against the ground. Torus waited and watched the house where he'd seen the curtains moving.

Caldwell raged inside the empty house where they'd been told they could find little Riley. The couple who was supposed to be living here were no where to be found. It looked like they had packed up in a hurry and left with only that which they could carry. He was further dismayed to find Riley's teddy bear on the floor by the door. They would have no way to track her now.

"Wait!" McKay cried out.

"What is it?" Caldwell demanded.

"I'm getting a signal..." he said jubilantly.

"Riley..." Caldwell said dejectedly, holding up the bear.

"No... besides that. It's Torus!" he declared.

"Where?"

"It looks like right where she said he'd be."

Neither Caldwell nor Lyta appeared able to move. Logan and Sheppard knew better than the others the agony they felt at having to choose between their two missing children. Logan stepped forward and took his hand in hers.

"Go... I'll keep a team here and we'll question everyone about where these people went. Someone has to know something."

"She's right, sir. You two need to go to where you KNOW Torus is. We'll keep looking here," Mitchell said.

"I...She..." Caldwell stammered.

"You can't be in two places at once, sir. Torus has managed to drop some breadcrumbs and you have to get to him before they move him too. We'll find Riley," Sheppard insisted.

Caldwell nodded reluctantly, clearly torn about what to do. Lorne and two other teams went with Caldwell and McKay, but before they could get very far, they were approached by a woman two houses down.

"You are looking for Tais and Eagin?" she asked.

"We are."

"What have they done?" she asked.

Caldwell studied her for a moment. "They have our daughter."

"I knew something was wrong," she muttered.

"What do you mean?" Lyta asked.

"They told everyone the child was an orphan they had taken in, but they seemed..."

"What?" Caldwell prodded.

"Afraid. Especially whenever a stranger stepped through the ring."

"As if they thought someone might come and take her from them?" Caldwell asked.

"Yes."

"Do you know where they went?" he asked.

"I do."

"Tell us," he demanded.


	54. Chapter 54

Torus stared in disbelief at the sweet face staring out the window. Riley! His heart soared. So, they had lied to him about his siblings as well as his parents. To think, he had been about to leave this place - and leave his brother and sister behind as well. It angered him to no end. Runer crawled up beside him.

"Why do we hesitate?" he asked anxiously.

Torus pointed at the window. "That is my sister, Riley. I cannot leave here without her and my brother."

"We haven't much time before the master discovers we are gone." Runer warned.

"Go!" said Torus. Go to the ring and dial the address I gave you. Take this!" he said, thrusting his bracelet into Runers' hand. Wait for several moments before you go through, or they will not unlock the shield. You must press the button here (showing him) repeatedly so they will know you are a friend and not an enemy. I will retrieve my brother and sister, but you must send help through so we can get back."

"But...Torus...We cannot leave you."

"You must! I have to help them and I do not know how many are holding them. We will need help, so you must go!"

Runer nodded reluctantly, then turned and led the other boys away toward the stargate. Torus inched his way closer to the house and his sister. He only hoped she would not cry out at the sight of him and alert anyone who was holding them. When he got close enough for her to be able to see him, he slowly stood up, pressing a finger to his lips to show her to be silent. The moment she saw him a huge smile crept across her face and she began to jump up and down. He shook his head and kept pressing his finger to his lips, silently urging her to be quiet.

Riley calmed down and looked behind her to see if anyone was coming. No one approached, so she turned her attention back to her brother, who was now standing on the other side of the glass, smiling at her. He could not raise the window and concluded that it was locked. He pointed at the lock on the top of the window and Riley ran to get something to stand on so she could reach it. She managed the lock and held her arms out for Torus as he slid the window up. He crawled in through the window and reached down to pick up his wriggling sister.

"Tor!" she cried.

"Shhhhh, Riley, you must be quiet," he warned.

"Where Sam?" she asked.

Torus pulled back to look at her. "He's not here with you?"

"No Sam..." she confirmed.

"Okay, they must have been telling me the truth about that much. Where's teddy?" he asked.

Her eyes filled with tears and her lower lip began to tremble. "Teddy lost," she whimpered.

"Okay, sis, it's okay...I'm gonna take you home now."

"Home! Mama, Daddy!" she chirped.

"Yep! Hush now... Let's go back out the window..."

"Put that child DOWN!" a voice ordered from behind him.

Torus froze and tightened his grip on Riley before turning to face the source of that voice.

"I said put her down!" the angry man ordered.

"I will not, sir," Torus said defiantly.

"How dare you come into my home and try to steal my child?!" he hissed.

"How dare I? How dare YOU, sir?! She was stolen from MY home, along with my brother and I. I have come to take her home."

"Tor!" Riley clapped.

"You are mistaken, young one... She is MY child," the man insisted.

"No!" Riley yelped, throwing her arms around Torus. "MY buddar!" she cried.

"Eagin? Who is this boy?" Tais asked as she entered the room.

"Buddar!" Riley yelled again.

"Eagin?" she asked again, turning pale.

"He claims that he is her brother and that he's come to take her home," Eagin told her.

"But... they said she had no family... And he's but a child himself," she shook her head.

"I was stolen as well, ma'am, but I escaped and now I've come to set my sister free as well," Torus informed her.

"But you have no parents to care for you..." she began.

"That is a LIE!" Torus yelled. "We _do_ have parents, and powerful friends. If you know what's good for you, you will let us go before they get here."

"You are full of bluster, boy, but I do not believe you. You are, no doubt, planning on selling this girl to the highest bidder!" Eagin accused.

"No! Tor buddar!" Riley protested her little arms clinging fiercely to her brother.

Runer was in the middle of dialing the address given to him by Torus when the ring suddenly lit up and an incoming wormhole formed. The boys scattered and hid. Runer was surprised to see armed soldiers come pouring through the ring, but he somehow knew that these soldiers were here for Torus. He bravely stepped forward before the last of them came through the event horizon and called out to them.

Torus remained in place, his arms firmly wrapped around the body of his sister. The man had a gun, but he would not shoot as long as he held Riley in his arms, for fear of hitting her. The man she'd called Eagin was livid with anger and fear, and the woman, Tais, was simply fearful. One moment they were all standing there staring at one another, the next, they were surrounded by soldiers. Lantean soldiers! Torus almost cried when he saw the tall, commanding form of his father come through the door.

"Mama!" Riley cried as her mother entered. "Daddy!"

She began squirming in Torus' arms, trying to get to her parents, but Torus would not release her. To get to their parents, she would have to first get past Eagin and Tais, and they weren't moving.

"Wait sis," he urged.

"Mama, Daddy!" she looked at Torus in confusion.

"Be still, my love," Lyta called out to her.

"Who are you?" Eagin demanded, though he already knew the answer.

"We are her parents and we've come to take her back home." Caldwell informed them.

"No!" Eagin countered.

"No?" Caldwell arched an eyebrow at him. "Trust me, you do NOT want to stand between me and my children," he warned icily.

"The girl is ours now," he persisted.

"What are you, deaf or stupid?" Sheppard asked, taking up a position behind Caldwell and edging Lyta out of the line of fire.

"We were told..."

"That she was an orphan, we know," Mitchell cut her off.

"You were lied to... duped, by one who wanted to cause us pain. She stole our children and gave them to couples like yourselves, hoping that we wouldn't find them." Caldwell said.

"You cannot take her from us..." Eagin insisted.

It was obvious that they had grown attached to the child in a short period of time. Caldwell just hoped that they wouldn't be stupid enough to try and fight them for her. "Torus?" Caldwell called out.

"Yes father?"

"Take your sister to the window and hand her to Major Lorne."

"Yes father!" he grinned.

"NO!" Eagin cried, aiming his gun at Torus' back.

"Don't even THINK about it!" Caldwell warned, his P-90 pointed at him.

Sheppard had his P-90 aimed at the woman, who was now crying profusely. "I'd listen to the man," he warned.

Eagin turned to see the weapon pointed at his wife. He held for a moment, then lowered his weapon in defeat. Torus rushed to the window and handed Riley to the waiting Major Lorne. Lorne then motioned for him to climb out as well. Torus looked back at his father, who nodded, then did as he was told. Once the children were safe, Caldwell's team lowered their weapons, but held their position. Lyta rushed from the house to see to her children outside.

"Now... what are we to do with you?" Caldwell asked.

Tais sank to the floor and began to cry. Eagin looked down at his wife, and knowing he had failed her, yet again, raised his weapon and fired at the man who had taken their child. Caldwell spun around as the slug drove into his shoulder. At once, Sheppard and Mitchell opened fire on the man, hitting him several times.

"Nooooooooo!" the woman screamed, racing to the side of her fallen husband.

"He gave us no choice, ma'am," Mitchell said angrily, shaking his head.

Logan rushed to Caldwell's side and began assessing his wound. Caldwell was conscious, but in great pain. Logan pressed her hand firmly over his wound to staunch the bleeding. Tais was still screaming and Logan called for someone to remove her. Bates and Teyla half-dragged / half-carried the woman from the room while Mitchell checked Eagin for a pulse.

"He's still alive," he informed the others.

Logan struggled with her training and her thirst for vengeance and finally shook her head. "Send him back through the gate, maybe Beckett can save his worthless hide," she hissed.

Sheppard called for some men to take him back to the gate and then went with Mitchell to inform his wife that they would try to help him. Logan turned her full attention to Caldwell. "Talk to me, Steve... How ya doing?" she asked.

"Peachy," he grimaced.

Lyta came rushing in and gasped when she saw her husband lying on the floor, covered in blood. Logan held up a hand, motioning for her to hand her the medical bag she'd dropped a few feet away. Once Lyta handed it to her, she motioned her away.

"Go back to the kids, Lyta, they're going to be scared and they need you. I promise I'll take care of Steve; he's going to be fine."

Lyta looked as though she might protest for a moment, but she nodded, gave Caldwell a quick kiss and went back outside. Caldwell reached up and squeezed Logan's hand.

"Thank you... I didn't want her to see me...like this..." he gasped gratefully.

"I know, tough guy..." she smiled.

"Feels a little like old times, eh?" he joked.

She knew he was referring to the time they'd been trapped in the rubble of the collapsed room in Atlantis years before.

"Kinda," she smiled. "Steve, I need you to be as tough as you were back then, okay? I have to check your wound to see if the bullet is still there."

"You're the boss," he winced.

Back in New Lantea, Eagin was rushed immediately into surgery, and Weir welcomed back Lyta, Torus and Riley. Lorne also accompanied them, followed by Teyla and Bates escorting Tais, and gave her a full report about what had happened. Weir was horrified at what had gone down and waited anxiously for the others to stabilize and transport Caldwell back.

Upon their return, Beckett let Dr. Halpern to finish up with the injured Genii so he could tend to Caldwell. The bullet remained imbedded in his shoulder, so Beckett had to operate on him in order to remove it. With Halpern being the only other doctor present and him being currently occupied, Beckett enlisted Logan to help him in Caldwell's surgery. Initially, she had planned to simply deliver him into Beckett's care and go back out to search for her children, but Beckett needed help and she was the only one available to help him.

Sheppard assured her that he and the others would continue to search while she was helping Beckett and sent her on her way with a kiss. Mitchell and Sheppard re-formed their teams while Bates interrogated the woman, Tais. She explained to him that the only reason her husband did what he did was because he felt he had failed her again. They had been told that he was the reason they were unable to have children of their own. He knew how devastated she had been at the news and had made it his life's mission to somehow give her the children she so desperately wanted. The fact that they had lost the only child they'd been able to secure had been more than he could bear.

Tais had been unable to help them with any further information about the other children who were still missing. She had not even known that there had been other children. She was suitably horrified to learn just how those children had come to be scattered through the galaxy and swore that she hadn't known anything about Vanu's plans ahead of time, nor where she might be now. Unable to get any further information out of her, Bates focused his attention on Fauni.

By the time they finished operating on Caldwell, Logan was competely exhausted. Beckett insisted that she get some rest, but Logan was determined to go back out and search for her children. No matter how much Beckett, Weir and Bates protested, Logan remained determined. Seeing how she was nearly dead on her feet, Beckett took extreme measures to ensure that she would rest, for a few hours at least. As Logan bent over to lace up her boots, Beckett moved in behind her and injected her with a sedative. Logan angrily brushed his hand away, but it was too late. She was already swaying on her feet when the darkness swept over her and crumpled into Beckett's arms.

"You WHAT?!" Sheppard bellowed over the radio.

"She was exhausted, John. She needed to rest and she was refusing. She isn't going to do the kids any good if she's dead on her feet. For that matter, neither are you. A few hours rest wouldn't hurt you either," Beckett said.

"How could you just... Doc, you know she's going to be furious when she wakes up." Sheppard shook his head and looked over at Mitchell.

"Better angry and alert than asleep on her feet and wounded like the General," Beckett retorted.

Mitchell shrugged, clearly not wanting to get in the middle of it, though that was right where he was. He could see both points of view.

"How long before she wakes up?" Sheppard asked.

"I'd like her to get another hour, at least. I'd like you to come back and get some rest, too, Colonel."

"Not gonna happen, Doc, but don't worry, I'm fine."

"Yeah, that's what Logan said, too." Beckett muttered.

"We'll check back with you in about an hour," Sheppard said.

"You're not planning on being here when Logan wakes up?" Beckett asked.

"Are you kidding?! _You_ did this, Doc, now you have to deal with the consequences. Good luck. Sheppard out!"

Beckett sat back and looked over at a sleeping Logan. She was one of the sweetest people he'd ever met, but Sheppard was right, she had a wicked temper under certain circumstances. She would be furious with him, but he stood by his decision. He had no doubt that she would have ended up getting herself either hurt or killed out there in the condition she'd been in. Still... He felt it might be prudent to have Bates or one or two of the S.O.'s present when he woke her up. Better yet, he thought... then got up and went to check on the General's condition.

"What's the matter, Doc? You look a little... nervous," Caldwell eyed him curiously.

"Come with me, General, we're going for a little ride," Beckett replied, taking hold of the gurney he was lying on.

On the way to Logan's room, Beckett told Caldwell about having to sedate her to force her to take some much needed rest. He was pleased to see that the General agreed with his decision, but somewhat displeased to see the amusement in Caldwell's eyes.

"What?" he asked.

"She's gonna be _pissed_ ," Caldwell snickered.

"That's why YOU'RE here, General... You're going to keep the lass from tearing my head off."

"From my bed?!" Caldwell chortled.

"One word from you and she'll... well, she won't throttle me at least," Beckett swallowed audibly.

"No guarantees, Doctor, but I'll do my best," Caldwell shook his head, his eyes alight with amusement.

As expected, Logan was beyond livid when Bckett finally roused her. The few hours of uninterrupted sleep had done wonders to restore her strength and clarity. Unfortunately, it also gave her the strength for a full blown tirade. Caldwell allowed her to vent for a short time before stepping in, figuratively. With a sharp command, Logan ceased ranting and turned to look at her commanding officer.

"Enough, Colonel. You needed the rest, you refused to comply with the CMO's orders, so you were forced to comply. Now, suck it up and move on," he told her.

Logan swallowed what she was about to say, clamped her mouth shut and nodded affirmatively. At this, Beckett took the opportunity to beat a hasty retreat.

"Thank you. Now, if you're ready to go back on duty, I will allow you to join Bates in interrogating that woman... Fauni... See if we can get any more intel out of her," Caldwell told her.

"Yes sir," her eyes gleamed at the prospect.

"And Logan?"

"Sir?"

"For what it's worth, I promise we won't give up until we bring your kids home, too."

"I... Thank you sir... It's worth a lot. How are YOU feeling, by the way?" she asked, somewhat sheepishly.

"I'll be fine, Logan."

"Good," she smiled and started to leave, then thought better of it and came back to plant a gentle kiss on his forehead. "I'm glad you're okay, Steve."

"Thanks," he smiled. "Now, get going, and don't terrorize Beckett anymore for doing what he _had_ to do."

"Yes sir," she saluted smartly and took off to find Bates.

Bates filled her in on eveyrthing they'd gotten from the woman so far, which was nothing more than they'd learned before. Bates did share his opinion that he wasn't sure if the woman hated Logan more than she feared her or if it was the other way around. Still, he felt like they might be able to use that to their advantage. Logan kept that theory in mind as she entered the woman's cell and began pacing back and forth in front of her. Fauni watched her silently for a few moments, waiting for her to speak, and as Bates predicted, she became more and more uncomfortable and decidedly uneasy.

"I thought you would have killed me by now," she finally said.

"Don't think it hasn't crossed my mind," Logan hissed.

"Then why haven't you?"

"Because you haven't told us everything you know yet," Logan replied.

"How can you say that? I've answered every one of your questions because of that drug you gave me!"

"Maybe we just haven't been asking the RIGHT questions."

Both women turned to find Sheppard standing in the doorway. He looked exhausted, but the fire in his eyes hadn't diminished one bit. Logan looked deep in his eyes, seemingly communicating with him on some level no one else could hear or understand. After a moment, Logan nodded slightly and stepped aside.

"So, has anyone told you that we've retrieved all the children, except my own?" Sheppard asked coldly.

"No they haven't," her eyes shifted from him to Logan and back again. "That IS good news."

"On the contrary," he countered. "It just serves to make _us_ more dangerous. We can now focus just on finding OUR children without having to worry if the others are safe. You know our reputation, do you not?"

Fauni looked genuinely frightened for the first time. "I do."

"Believe me, whatever you've heard is nothing compared to the ferocity we will employ to protect our children. Are you beginning to see where I'm going with this?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

Fauni nodded, her eyes wide and frightened - finally. She had thought they would kill her, quick and clean, and she would be with her beloved Acastus again, but that was not what they had in mind at all.

"I don't care what it takes, or how many Genii I have to kill... I WILL find my children and I WILL get them back. Between Colonel Devane and myself alone, you're looking at a _very_ high body count. When you add in our friends and fellow soldiers... Well, you're probably looking at total annihilation of the Genii. DO YOU DOUBT ONE WORD OF WHAT I AM TELLING YOU?!" he shouted in the woman's face.

"No! You can't do that. No one else was involved with stealing your children... They are innocent!" she cried.

"So were our _children_ , but you chose to use the most innocent and vulnerable to exact your revenge. You didn't even stop to think about how much you were hurting the children, did you?! All you cared about was getting revenge! Well you know what? Acastus Kolya wasn't WORTH it! He was weak and blind and his hatred ended up costing hundreds of Genii lives that WE could have saved!" he snarled.

"Liar!" she screamed.

"Even HE saw the error of his ways toward the end. Even HE admitted that the Genii had been foolish not to take advantage of the proposed alliance between our people. Now YOUR foolishness will cost more Genii lives!" Logan barked.

"No!"

"Tell me where my children are!" Sheppard hissed, his eyes cold, steely and determined.

"I don't know!" she shouted back.

"Tell me where Vanu took them!" he demanded.

"I don't know where she ended up!" she admitted.

Sheppard jumped on that and flashed a quick glance at Logan. "I didn't ask where she ended up... That's an interesting choice of words..." he mused.

Fauni sank back in her chair and clamped her mouth shut. The drug was wearing off and she had a bit more control over whether or not she talked.

"Do you know where she went when she first left you?"

"I'm done talking," she said defiantly, hoping to goad one of them into killing her out of anger.

"I think not... You have family back home, don't you?" he countered.

Fauni's eyes widened in fear but she did not speak.

"It doesn't matter," he shrugged. "I know that you do."

"You won't use them as leverage against me... You Lanteans always pride yourselves on avoiding such tactics," she sneered.

"Apparently I didn't make myself clear earlier... I will do _whatever_ it takes to find my children. That means ANYTHING, including using the people YOU love to get what I need."

"They are Genii... They will understand..." she murmured uncertainly.

"Will they? When you are right there, watching and able to stop what I WILL do to them if you don't cooperate?" he asked.

"You would make me watch?" Fauni asked, horrified.

"You'll have a front row seat," he chirped. "You can explain to them why _they_ have to suffer for the things _you_ helped set in motion. We have a saying where we come from: _In for a penny, in for a pound_. You started this, you get to be there for the results. Now, we _can_ avoid such nastiness if you'll just tell me what I need to know."

"You are as evil as Vanu said you were..." she hissed.

Logan approached, leaned over and looked her directly in the eye. "You ain't seen nothing yet, cupcake!"

"I do not believe you will do what you say... I do not believe your superiors will allow you to..."

"LOOK AROUND YOU WOMAN! Do you see anyone here protecting you? Anyone who even remotely looks like they would stand in my way?!" he shouted.

Fauni looked around the room, but there were only the three of them there, herself, Devane and Sheppard. The one called Bates had left the room upon Sheppard's arrival.

"Where did Vanu go when she left you?" Logan asked.

"I won't... I won't tell you!" she screamed, shaking her head.

"Oh yes... you will," Sheppard nodded at Logan, who moved over to the table and pulled out the same bag Fauni had seen her use earlier.

Sheppard stood behind the woman and held her firmly down by the shoulders while Logan pulled out a syringe, filled it and came over to stand before her.

"One more time, Fauni... Where did she go after she left you?" Sheppard growled.

"No!"

Without hesitation, Logan took her arm, found a vein and jabbed the needle in, somewhat harder than she really needed to. She waited a few moments, to give the drug a chance to work through her system. "That was a stronger dose than last time, and since you haven't had anything to eat for quite a while now, you should be feeling pretty sick soon... Now, let's start again, shall we?"

Weir and Daniel were standing ouside, watching the proceedings on the monitor. Weir was decidedly uncomfortable, but she wasn't interfering. She looked up at Daniel, who was watching everything play out with a mix of admiration and sadness in his eyes.

"Dr. Jackson?" she shuddered.

"Yes?" he glanced down at her.

"Please... Remind me in the future, never to piss that woman off?" she told him.

Daniel grimaced and managed a half smile. "Yeah... it's definitely not a good idea to get on her bad side."

"You KNOW where she went when she left you." Sheppard demanded.

"Yes."

"Where did she go?" he prodded.

"I don't know the name... of the planet..." she admitted to her own horror. The drug was definitely stronger this time.

"But you know the coordinates."

"The... what?" she blinked, confused.

"The _symbols_... You know the symbols," he clarified.

"Oh...yes..."

"Excellent! Now we're getting somewhere. Tell me the symbols."

"I... I don't...want to..." she was struggling against the compulsion of the drug.

"I'm aware of that, but you'll tell me anyway before I really lose patience," he warned her.

Logan put a drawing in front of her with all the gate symbols on it and untied one of her hands so she could point out the correct ones.

"Show us!" Logan ordered.

After a few moments of inner struggle, the woman finally began pointing them out.

"Thank you. Now point them out in the correct order," Sheppard ordered.

The woman had now lost all fight and quietly complied with his demand. Once they had the symbols, Logan called for some S.O.'s to come and stand guard over Fauni and, as an afterthought, she asked them to call Beckett to minister to her after they were gone.


	55. Chapter 55

While Logan was some distance away questioning some of the locals, Bates waited with Sheppard and Mitchell.

"Your wife can be very scary sometimes," Bates informed him.

Sheppard grinned and shook his head. "You have NO idea, Lieutenant!"

"Yeah, well... I know *I* will never do anything to cross her, that's for sure!" he chuckled.

"Wise choice, Bates... Very wise," Sheppard nodded.

"Yeah, and yet she still sent in Beckett to make sure she was okay after you two were done with her..." he seemed genuinely bewildered by that.

"Well... The Colonel can be funny that way, Bates..." Sheppard grunted.

Mitchell was doing his best not to snicker. He, too was familiar with Logan's temper and knew better than to end up on the receiving end of it. "So... What'd she do to Beckett for drugging her?"

Bates grinned anew and shook his head. "She started ripping him a new one until the General stepped in. Guess he figured we still needed Beckett!"

Sheppard looked across the way at his wife. The forced rest had done her some good, but he knew she was still teetering on the edge, just as he was. They had gone to the coordinates provided by Fauni three days ago, and had been tracking Vanu's movements ever since. She had been careful to cover her tracks, but not careful enough, it seemed. There had been several people who had seen her come and go. Most weren't anxious to get involved, but there were a few who openly cooperated.

Problem was, they had no idea how close they were to actually finding her. Vanu had known they'd come after her, so she made a point of covering a lot of ground, in an effort to confuse or lose them. They were all tired and cranky and, though they refused to admit it, Logan and Sheppard were scared.

When the trail ran cold, Mitchell called a temporary halt to the search, so they could all rest, regroup and strategize on ways to pick up the trail again. Sheppard drew Logan aside, some distance away from the others where she could feel free to drop her guard. She was barely holding it together as Sheppard took her into his arms and held her close. She was finally able to admit to him that the thought of her babies being scared and calling out for her was eating her alive. She couldn't stand the thought of her children alone and frightened, wondering where their parents were. She broke down in Sheppards' arms and cried her heart out.

Mitchell kept the others occupied so they wouldn't notice Logan or Sheppard. It tore him up inside to see the pain the two of them were in, aside from his own fear and pain at the unknown fate of two children he loved as if they were his own. His simmering rage threatened to boil over as he thought about the two children who HAD to be frightened and wondering about their parents. Since the others had been told that their parents were dead, there was little doubt that Nic and Chels had been told the same thing. Blocking that out of his mind for now, Mitchell ordered his teams to fan out and begin re-questioning the locals, on the off chance they might have missed someone.

Back in New Lantea, Roth had called a meeting with Weir and Caldwell. A meeting he'd been asking to have for days. He was finally granted an audience with both of them, though neither was really in the mood to deal with him.

"I can help," he insisted.

"I'm sure you could, but I'm less sure that you really would," Caldwell growled.

"The rest of us were duped by Vanu, just like you were. We are not part of what she has done and we are as horrified as you are. We were sincere in our desire for an alliance, still are, for that matter."

"And we should believe you... why?!" Caldwell sneered, openly hostile.

"We are trying to save what is left of our people. You are our best hope of achieving that. I sincerely want to help you get the remaining two children back safely, and I'm sure I can do that."

"What makes you so sure?" Weir asked.

"I once served in the military, I knew Acastus Kolya and his brother, but I never agreed with their politics or their methods. I never met their sister before we began our negotiations, they never even mentioned they HAD a sister, but... I know the way the Kolyas think. I still have contacts out there. Those who would not even speak to your people; they will speak to me. I can get information that your people can't. Please... let me help?"

Weir looked sideways at Caldwell. "We'd really like to believe you."

"Let me prove myself to you. Let me go with your teams, they can guard against any possible escape you think I might make. I know my people have given you no reason to trust us, but I swear to you, my intentions are honorable."

Caldwell pulled Weir aside to discuss the matter. "I don't like it..." he began.

"Neither do I, but he does have a point."

"What if it's another trap?" he asked.

"What if it's not?" she countered.

"Look, Elizabeth, I want to believe him, I really do. I want those kids back..." he trailed off, biting back a fresh wave of anger and helplessness.

"If it's just him... And our people stay with him every moment, so he can't set up a trap or contact anyone else..." she ventured.

Caldwell struggled between his desire to find the children and his inherent mistrust of the Genii. "We need to talk to John and Logan before we decide anything," he finally said.

Two hours later, they met him at the gate on the world where they'd lost the trail. He was met with hostility, which he expected, but he was treated fairly enough. Certainly more fairly than any of them would have been treated by the Genii. He went straight to Logan and Sheppard and swore his loyalty to them and promised, on his life, that he would do whatever he could to help them find their children.

Mitchell, Carter, Teal'c and Roth went back to the village and began to question the villagers once again. Initially, they received the same responses as before, but one woman recognized Roth and called out to him.

"You align yourself with these?" she asked him incredulously.

"I do," Roth replied. "They are not the monsters our government has painted them to be. Rather, they could be the salvation of all our people."

"Truly?" she asked.

"Truly. Had our government aligned with them, we might not now be on the verge of extinction. With their protection, our kind could have been flourishing and safe from the cullings."

The woman, Lurie, looked at each one of them for a moment, searching for the truth in their eyes. Finally, she nodded and picked up a stick to begin drawing in the dirt.

"I have seen this woman of whom you speak. She was here not a week hence. She did have two young ones with her. You say they were stolen from their parents?"

"Yes," Mitchell nodded. "They were."

"I helped her to carry some supplies to the ring. These are the symbols for the world where she took them, though I do not believe that was her final destination."

"You are sure of these symbols?" Roth asked.

"Very."

"Thank you," Mitchell said.

"I hope you find them."

"We will," he assured her.

They ran back to where the others were waiting and filled them in on what they'd learned. Within moments, they were ready to resume their chase.

They continued to search for the next three days, gating to six more planets until finally, they caught a break. In the village, Roth was recognized by some of his old comrades. People, like he, who were tired of the old Genii regime. Roth explained to them what had happened and they readily agreed to help. It wasn't long before they discovered that many people in the village had been recruited by Vanu and her husband to help them. Several of the Lanteans had already been accosted, as they spread out among the villagers to question them.

Apparently, they'd been told that Vanu and her "family" were survivors of an attack by the Lantean people, and that they were being hunted so the Lanteans could kill them and steal their children. Many of the villagers bought into her story and agreed to help them should the Lanteans show up. Soon they were confronted by armed bands of villagers who were trying to kill them by any means possible. Rather than use deadly force, the Lanteans relied on stunners to incapacitate their attackers.

During the fracus, Logan and Sheppard got separated, but were able to maintain contact over the radio, so they each knew the other was unharmed. Sheppard ended up with Roth, Teal'c, Teyla, Carter and McKay, while Logan had Bates, Lorne and Mitchell with her. The other teams were scattered throughout the numerous villages in the area.

"You know," Mitchell began breathlessly. "With the amount of fight these people have in them, Vanu HAS to be here."

Logan nodded. "That's what I was thinking, too. If she weren't, they wouldn't be trying so hard. They would have just sent us off on a wild-goose chase or something..."

"But where?" Bates asked.

Logan shrugged. "Someplace well-concealed... Underground, maybe?"

Mitchell nodded. "Could be... We need to turn one or more of these people... Get them to give her up."

Sheppard and the others were trying to make their way back to Logan's location when they were suddenly ambushed by a group of villagers intent on keeping them from going in the direction they were headed. A fierce fire-fight ensued and in the distance, Sheppard saw a man suddenly dart out of a building about 75 yards from where he stood. He could only make out the man's form and the fact that he was carrying... something... And that something was squirming. Instinctively he knew it had to be one of the children. He motioned to the others, who nodded understanding, and began firing their stunners at anything that moved, in order to clear a path to wherever the fleeing man was going.

Logan radioed for two teams to reamin by the gate and not to let anyone near it, for fear that Vanu would escape yet again. They were close now. She could feel it. Mitchell pointed out a shed behind one of the homes they were about to search. It looked more like an outhouse, but if it was, it was in an odd place in relation to the house.

"Whaddya think?" Mitchell asked.

"Could be," she shrugged.

As they moved to surround it, Bates called out that he saw the front door burst open as he went past it. A woman, carrying a blanket covered bundle charged out and ran toward another building three homes down. As the woman flung open the door, the blanket covering her burden slipped off and Logan caught sight of what, or rather WHO, was under it.

"Chelsea!" she cried, running faster.

At the familiar sound of her mothers' voice, Chelsea really began to struggle and kick at the woman holding her. "Mama!" she called.

The woman ran inside, but the four of them quickly caught up and followed her into the barn-like structure. She was having a hard time opening the hatch-like door, which obviously must have led to an underground facility. The door itself was heavy, but she was struggling to hold onto the now screaming, flailing child in her arms.

"Mama! Cammin!" she cried as she looked over Vanu's shoulder.

In a heartbeat, they had Vanu surrounded and she knew it. After giving the four of them a long, hard stare, she pulled out a gun and held it to Chelsea's head. Rage and fear engulfed Logan as her eyes met Vanu's.

"Let her go," Logan ordered, through clenched teeth.

"I have nothing to lose...now..."

"I _will_ kill you!" Logan warned.

"You'll do that anyway. This way, I take her with me," Vanu countered.

Chelsea stopped struggling to look up at the woman holding her, then look over at her mother. "Mama?"

Logan could hear the fear and confusion in her daughter's voice, and through sheer force of will, she calmed herself enough to speak calmly to Chelsea in Ancient. Mitchell, too, saw the fear in her eyes and wanted nothing more than to crush the woman who put it there. He looked at Logan, willing to follow her lead. He'd never put in the time to learn the Ancient language, but he understood some of what Logan was saying to Chelsea. She was assuring her daughter that everything would be alright, and that her father was also there and they would be bringing her and Nicolas home. Once Chelsea began to calm, Logan turned her attention to Vanu again.

"You have nowhere to go," she said. "It's over, now give me back my child!"

"I think not!" Vanu shrieked as she cocked the handgun she had pointed at Chelsea.

Logan abruptly shouted at her daughter in Ancient, warning her to duck her head. Chelsea complied without hesitation and several shots rang out.

ELSEWHERE

It took them a while, but Sheppard and the others finally managed to corral the man in the center of the village. Sheppard allowed himself to breathe a sigh of relief when he saw that the man was indeed holding one of his children. He couldn't allow himself to wonder, at that moment, about where the other child was. Not until he made sure the one he could see and almost touch was safe.

"Dada!" Nic blurted upon seeing him.

"Hey cadet, I've been looking for you," Sheppard assured him.

The few villagers who'd gathered around were watching the exchange with interest. The boy had called the Lantean man "Dada" not Mertahn, who had claimed to be his father. As they watched the boy stretch his tiny arms out to the Lantean man, they began to wonder if anything they'd been told was true. After all, the Lanteans had not used killing force on them, when they would have been justified in doing so after being attacked by the villagers. Indeed, if anything Vanu and Mertahn had told them had been true, the Lanteans would have simply slaughtered all of the villagers without giving it a second thought.

"Dada!" The boy called out again, his little arms outstretched toward him.

As they alternated between looking at the boy and the Lantean man, there was not a villager among them who could deny the resemblance between them. The boy was a tiny mirror image of the man.

"Do you see now?" Roth called out to them. "Do you see who is telling the truth (pointing at Sheppard) and who is not?" (Pointing at Mertahn)

The villagers dropped their weapons and several of them walked away in disgust.

"Give me my son," Sheppard ordered.

"No."

"I will kill you," Sheppard growled.

"Where is my wife?" Mertahn asked, ignoring the threat.

"I was about to ask you the same thing," Sheppard snorted. "Does she have my daughter?"

Mertahn smiled. "So... She remains free."

"Not for long," Sheppard replied. "I'm sure my wife has caught up to her by now..." he let the implied threat hang in the air.

Mitchell cradled the weeping Logan and Chelsea in his arms while Bates and Lorne moved the lifeless body of Vanu out of the way and covered it up. Both were shaken, but uninjured, thanks to Logan's marksmanship. Chelsea had done precisely what her mother instructed her to do, without a second's hesitation. Vanu had no time to react before Logan's first bullet hit home deep in her shoulder. Vanu instinctively reacted by dropping Chelsea, who was scooped up by Mitchell before she could hit the ground. He instantly rolled over her, shielding her tiny body with his own to prevent Vanu from shooting her. But it was Logan Vanu aimed her weapon at now, and Logan who fired three more shots into Vanu, bringing her down for good.

Bates and Lorne had moved in, quickly separating the woman from her gun and then checking to make sure she really was dead. Mitchell continued to shield Chelsea as he got up and carried her over to a bail of hay in the corner of the barn. Logan stood, frozen in shock, for a moment before hurrying over to take her daughter in her arms. Her knees buckled as she picked her up, and Mitchell pulled her down onto his lap where he cradled both of them in his arms. He knew Logan wasn't crying because she'd killed Vanu, but out of relief and joy at having her daughter back, safely, in her arms. He looked back over his shoulder at the covered body of the woman who had caused so much pain and anguish over the the last few weeks. If Logan hadn't killed her, HE would have.

Chelsea was crying because her mother was crying, and couldn't seem to stop. She burrowed snugly in between Mitchell and Logan and let the both of them comfort her together. When Logan was finally able to get control of herself again, Chelsea calmed and reached up to pat her face.

"Where's Daddy? Where's Nic?" she asked.

Logan dried her eyes and looked up at Mitchell. "Good question, baby. What say we go find them?" she croaked hoarsely.

They soon found Sheppard and the others congregated around Mertahn and Nic, apparently in the middle of the same kind of standoff Logan had with Vanu. Logan breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of her very much alive son, struggling in the arms of the strange man. When Mertahn caught sight of her, or more accurately, the sight of her holding CHELSEA, a look of shock and grief came over his face. He knew that the only way anyone could get the girl away from Vanu would be to kill her. Vanu had given him a detailed description of Logan Devane and he knew, without even asking, that it was she who was holding the girl in her arms.

"Mama!" Nic cried upon seeing her.

"Hi little man!" Logan chirped.

"Ches!" he cried, pointing at his sister.

Sheppard looked over at them, relief in his eyes at the sight of them. He waved to an ecstatic Chelsea but imediately returned his attention to Mertahn and his son, who was still in the line of fire. Logan quickly assessed the situation, handed Chelsea over to Mitchell, drew her sidearm and went to stand beside her husband.

"You are Devane?" Mertahn asked.

"Obviously," she replied.

"And my wife is..."

"Dead," Logan finished for him.

His face contorted in grief and his arms tightened around Nic. A small knife appeared in his hand and he raised it toward the boy's throat. Both Sheppard and Logan stiffened and cocked their weapons, aimed directly at his head.

"Don't do it!" Sheppard warned.

"There's no reason for you to die, too." Logan said.

"Without my wife... There is no reason for me to live," he told them.

"You don't have to take my son with you! If you want to do yourself in after we've gone, we can't stop you, but you don't have to hurt the boy!" Sheppard said.

"I am already dead, but before I go, I can avenge my wife!" Mertahn cried.

"What about the rest of your family? Do you care about them? All your vengeance is gonna do is hurt THEM, because I swear, if you harm my son I will hunt down every last member of your family and I will kill them!" Sheppard cried.

This gave Mertahn pause for thought. He still had brothers and sisters, though his parents had long ago been taken during the cullings. He had not wanted this war with the Lanteans, but he loved his wife and would have done anything for her. There was little doubt in his mind that Sheppard meant what he'd said. He WOULD go after his family and he WOULD kill them all.

As he mulled this over, young Nic began to get restless and began kicking his legs. Logan shouted to him, in Ancient, to kick the man holding him. Nic looked up at the man and then landed a solid kick to his groin. Mertahn cried out in pain and let go of the boy, who landed squarely on his feet, teetered over then began to crawl toward Logan and Sheppard. Mertahn pulled his arm back, to throw the knife he was holding at the boy when both Logan and Sheppard screamed "NO!" Two shots rang out and the knife slid out of the suddenly lifeless fingers. Mertahn slumped to the ground, two bullet holes in his head, just as Nic reached his parents.

"Mama, Dada," he cried out, reaching up for them.

Sheppard bent over and scooped the boy into his arms, keeping him turned away from the sight of the dead man on the ground. Nic was enveloped by both his parents, laughing and crying as they held and kissed him.

"Ches! Ches!" he called for his sister, who had been taken inside one of the nearby homes so she wouldn't see what was going on.

"Where is Chelsea?" Sheppard asked, looking around.

"Cameron," Logan sniffed.

The three of them went off to find Mitchell and Chelsea while the others dealt with the aftermath of their ordeal. A smiling Mitchell handed Chelsea off to her father while he stole some cuddles and kisses from the newly recovered Nicolas Sheppard. Logan stood back for a moment, saying a silent prayer of thanks, as she watched her now reunited family before joining in on the hugs and kisses. when Mitchell would have walked away to give them some privacy, Sheppard was the one who pulled him back in and asked him to stay.

The Sheppard family made one quick stop at New Lantea before heading home to Atlantis. They wanted to show Fauni that they had indeed found their children and let her know that her hopes for vengeance had been thwarted, as virtually all Genii vengeance plans had been before. She didn't believe them until Mitchell paraded both children past the window in front of her. Her scream of rage and frustration was like music to their ears.

"And THAT, woman, is the last you will ever see of my children, or any Lantean children, for the rest of your miserable life!" Logan snapped.

Sheppard smirked as his wife sashayed victoriously out of the room and joined their children, hugging them close in full view of the window in front of Fauni.

"You know," he began, grinning wickedly. "I really can't blame Kolya for falling in love with her... She's the most extraordinary woman who ever lived." With that, he swept out of the room and joined his family.

Mitchell escorted them to the gate, intending to see them off.

"Cammin come?" Chelsea asked.

Mitchell leaned over and kissed the top of her head. "Not this trip, sweet-pea," he said.

"Cam!" Nic pointed at Mitchell with a pout on his face, matching Chelsea's.

"Why don't you come?" Sheppard asked, looking every bit as disappointed as the kids were.

"Are you sure? I thought you'd want to get the kids settled back in and have a quiet evening," he asked.

"You're kidding, right? A quiet evening with these two?" Sheppard snorted. "I'll need all the help I can get just to wear them out enough to make them sleepy!"

Logan nodded. "He's right," she pointed out. "Please... Come with us."

"Cammin come!" Chelsea demanded.

"Cam!" echoed Nic.

"Sounds unanimous," Sheppard chuckled.

"Okay then," he shrugged, happy to oblige. "C'mere squirt!" he said, holding out his arms to Chelsea.

Chelsea launched herself into his arms and held on tight. When they reached the gateroom, Weir told them that Beckett would meet them in the Atlantis infirmary to give the children a complete check-up. She also told them that Caldwell was back in Atlantis recuperating from his gunshot wound, and looked forward to seeing the Sheppard children as soon as Beckett checked them over.

They thanked her and then stepped through the gate. They were greeted on the other side by O'Neill and Caldwell. O'Neill had been kept appraised of everything that had been going on and he was enormously relieved to see the entire Sheppard clan step through the gate together. He greeted both children with gifts, two stuffed dogs, since even he wasn't brave enough to give them real dogs without consulting their parents. The children hugged and thanked O'Neill before he sent them on their way.

Mitchell lingered behind for a while to give them a full report, while Sheppard and Logan took the kids to the infirmary. O'Neill hardly blinked when Mitchell informed him of the events leading up to the deaths of the two Genii, Vanu and Mertahn. There was no doubt in his mind that the shootings had been thoroughly justified, and wasn't sure he would even fault them if they'd fired without provocation.

Beckett checked out both kids and gave them both a clean bill of health. He prescribed a good dinner and then off to bed, though he warned them that the kids were very overstimulated at the moment and it would probably be hours before they could actually relax enough to fall asleep. Mitchell soon joined them and then accompanied them back to their quarters. He'd already arranged to have dinner sent down, as he knew the kids were tightly wound and didn't need the extra excitement of well-meaning staff members ooh-ing and ahh-ing over them tonight.

Logan left Sheppard and Mitchell in charge of entertaining the kids while she took a shower before dinner. She needed a few minutes to herself so she could decompress without worrying the children. She stripped off her clothes and stepped into the steaming shower. Letting the water flow over her body, she let go of all the pain and tension of the past few weeks and sank to the floor, letting the tears come that she'd held back for so long. Sheppard hadn't seen her face when she went into the other room but Mitchell had. He nudged Sheppard and pointed toward the bedroom.

"Maybe you should jump in the shower, too, John... I've got these two."

Sheppard glanced quizzically at him, then nodded. "You guys be good for Uncle Cameron," he admonished them.

"Kay," Chelsea said.

"Kay," Nic echoed.

Sheppard went into their bedroom and closed the door behind him. He quickly stripped off his own clothes and joined Logan in the shower. His heart broke as he saw her sobbing on the floor of the shower and gathered her into his arms. His own tears mingled with hers and the shower spray. He held her tightly, crying with her until their tears were spent.

By the time they emerged from the bedroom, completely composed now, dinner had arrived and Mitchell was getting them into their high-chair and booster seat. As Logan looked around the hastily erected dinner table, she smiled contentedly. THIS was the way it was supposed to be.


	56. Chapter 56

The following morning, they enjoyed a festive breakfast in the mess hall. Dozens of people came by to welcome the children home and fuss over them. O'Neill came by and pulled them aside for a brief conversation while the kids were occupied with Mitchell.

"Before I say anything else, you two need to know that this is not up for discussion, debate or negotiation; so I don't want to hear any arguments or protestations, especially in that weird tandem talking thing you two do, alright?"

"Yes sir," they replied in unison.

He rolled his eyes. "You two are officially on leave as of (looking at his watch) right now, actually. Three weeks."

"I..." Sheppard began.

"But..." Logan started.

"Ack!" O'Neill raised a hand to stave off any arguments. "What'd I just say? No arguments. Colonel Mitchell tells me you've been toying with the idea of taking the kids to Disneyland or something, so now would be a good time to do that."

"I..."

"But..."

"Ack! Arrangements have already been made for your housing and transportation, so I suggest you start packing."

"I..."

"But..."

"ACK!" O'Neill fixed them both with a no-nonsense glare. "I swear, I never saw two people with such an aversion to leisure time as you guys..." he muttered. "I'll be returning to Earth at 1150 hours, and I expect you and your kids to escort me back home, so be at the gate and ready to go by then."

When neither of them said anything, O'Neill rolled his eyes again in exasperation.

"Well?!"

"I..."

"Umm..."

"You aren't going to fight me on this..." O'Neill told them, rather than asking.

"I..."

"No sir, we aren't going to fight you," Logan finally blurted out. " Thank you for being so generous."

Sheppard shrugged and cracked a half-smile. "I was gonna say that," he said.

"Oh... Okay then," O'Neill grinned.

"But..."

"Here we go!" he groaned.

"I was just going to point out, sir, that John and I weren't the only ones who had their children kidnapped and..." She stopped as O'Neill held up a hand.

"And you aren't the only ones who have been granted leave to recover and bond with the kiddies again. The others have already been re-establishing their familial bonds - after all, their kids were recovered pretty quickly, while yours took a bit longer to track down... Of course they are SHEPPARDS, so nothing can ever be easy with them, but I digress... You _will_ take this leave, you _will_ bond with the kidlets over some big fun with a giant mouse or something and you _will_ enjoy yourselves for a change... Clear?"

"Crystal sir," they replied in unison.

"Your kids don't do that, too, do they?" he asked.

"Yes sir, they do," Sheppard smirked.

"Great... Pretty soon the four of you will be talking in unison... It'll be like sensurround at a movie thater..." he continued mumbling to himself as he walked away. "Remember! 1150 hours!"

McKay approached from behind them. "Hey guys, what's up?"

Sheppard flashed him a bemused smile and shrugged. "We're going to Disneyland!"

The kids were all wide-eyed in wonder as they made their way through the SGC and then to the surface of the Cheyenne Mountain complex. Chelsea was the first to mention the thing that immediately struck her as odd.

"Where's the ocean?" she asked.

"There is no ocean here, sweet-pea. But there will be when we get to California," Sheppard assured her.

"Oh," was all she could say.

As they approached the car they'd be taking to the airport, she stopped again and looked around at all the cars and exchanged a puzzled glance with her brother. "No jumpers?"

"No jumpers here either," Sheppard chuckled.

Chelsea gravely shook her head. "Not good," she said.

Logan smiled up at Sheppard. "She sure has a lot of you in her."

He smiled proudly. "Not that there's anything wrong with that... right?"

She laughed and kissed him. "I kinda like you, so I guess it's alright with me!"

"Come on cadets, let's get moving!" Sheppard said and loaded the family into the car.

Chelsea was a little bit more impressed with the plane ride than she had been with the car, but she didn't like the popping she felt in her ears. Jumpers definitely gave one a smoother ride, but she admitted that this was a little fun. When they finally hit California and she was able to see the ocean, she got very excited.

"Surf?" she asked her father.

Sheppard looked over at Logan who flashed him a cautious glance.

"Maybe. We'll see, sweet-pea," he hugged her tightly.

Nic was unusually quiet and at first they were afraid that he might be getting sick, but it just turned out that he was simply taking in all the new sights and sounds of the strange new world around him. His limited vocabulary kept him from verbalizing everything he was taking in, so he just sat and watched. Both children recognized signs showing Mickey Mouse as they neared the resort where they would be staying and they became very animated.

"Mickey really here?" Chelsea asked.

"Yep! And you get to meet him tomorrow!" Logan replied.

They got themselves and the children all settled in and unpacked, then took them downstairs to the pool so they could "swim" and check out other fun activities the resort had to offer. They were taken aback by the great number of children who were there, as they were used to primarily being around adults. They didn't talk much when another child approach, but they were fascinated by everything that they did.

Soon enough, the rigors of their long journey caught up with all of them and they decided to call it a night. they'd be heading into the park in the morning and they wanted the kids to be rested enough to enjoy their adventure.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

Logan collapsed on a bench and pulled Nic out of his stroller so he could watch his father and sister playing in Mickey's Bounce House. They'd spent most of the past few hours there in Toontown. Logan thought Toontown might be an excellent place to torture Genii prisoners, as it would be more effective at driving them wiggy than anything they could come up with in the military.

She and Sheppard had discussed the possibility that the crowds might frighten or intimidate the children, and they did to a point. Then the children seemed to be able to simply tune out and enjoy the experience. She and Sheppard, on the other hand, had a much harder time with the crowds. They'd gotten so used to life in Atlantis that every day, mundane Earth hassles, such as crowds and traffic, were rather jarring for them.

As she shared a bottle of water with her son, a man approached and asked if she minded if he and his son took a seat on the bench with them. She nodded, a smile in place, but when she got a good look at his face, she felt something even more jarring. She KNEW him! Or at least she felt like she did - or should.

"Something in my teeth?" he smiled teasingly.

There it was again. That undeniable sensation that she knew him. "I...no...I'm sorry...Have we met before?"

"Oh... I don't think so. I'm quite sure I would remember you," he grinned.

"Oh... I guess you just remind me of someone I know then..." she shrugged, clearly intrigued.

At that moment, Nic took advantage of her distraction and began dumping the bottle of water over his head, dousing her as well. She gasped in shock as the cold water ran down her front. "Nicolas Sheppard!" she gasped, grabbing the bottle out of his hand.

She didn't see the reaction he had when she said the name "Sheppard" but he looked like he'd been struck by lightning as she stood up and turned the young boy around so that he could see his face for the first time. Shock mixed with hope lighted in his eyes. He handed her some napkins to dry herself with and pondered his next move.

"Hot," Nic said in his own defense.

"Yes sweetie, I know... You Sheppard boys are sure impulsive though!" she chuckled.

It had been refreshing...Sort of.

"You okay?" The man asked.

"Yeah...It was nice... sort of. It IS hot," she smiled over at him.

"Mike Simmons," he stuck out a hand to shake hers. "And this is my son, Matt."

Logan shook his hand, still a little taken aback at how familiar both he and his son seemed to her. "Logan Sheppard," she smiled. "And this is Nic, as you heard. My husband and daughter are in the bounce house over there."

"My other son, too. We decided to take a breather," he sighed.

"Smart thinking," she observed.

They chatted for another twenty minutes or so and Logan still couldn't shake the feeling that she should know them. He was looking at her with the same speculative expression on his face that she had, but neither of them broached it with the other. She learned that he and his boys were staying at the same hotel as they, and that he was also military - Marines, though, not Air Force, and a Major. He became increasingly intrigued when she told him that both she and her husband were in the Air Force and that they were based out of Cheyenne Mountain, though he didn't pursue it any further.

Sheppard called out to her to let her know they were exiting the bounce house and asked her to meet them at the exit. She nodded and began gathering up her things.

"That was your husband," he said it more like a statement than a question.

"Yes, John... Colonel John Sheppard."

Mike nodded and told her it was nice to meet her and he hoped they might meet again, maybe at the hotel or something. She shook his hand and bade him and his son farewell. They watched her go and Matt looked up at his father.

"She's nice."

"Yes she is."

"Pretty too," Matt added.

"Very," Mike responded.

"Why did that baby look so familiar, Dad?"

"He did, did he?" Mike mused.

"Yeah... It was like I've seen him somewhere before. Kinda weird."

"Hmmmmm. Well, let's go see if we can get your brother to come out so we can go chow," he said distractedly.

Later, Logan told Sheppard about the man they'd met while waiting for he and Chelsea. She asked if he'd ever met anyone by that name or rank and shared with him the odd feeling that she knew him somehow. But Sheppard could think of no one he'd ever met with the name of Simmons in the Marines.

They went on about their day and put all thought of the man behind them. The children were floored when they were able to meet most of their favorite characters from the Disney movie DVD's they'd been sent in Atlantis. Chelsea, especially, was awestruck when she was able to meet Ariel, from the Little Mermaid, as she aspired to be a mermaid herself one day. But then her focus became torn when she met Tinkerbell, the pixie. Each represented two of her biggest loves: Swimming and flying. What was a girl to do? Nic was enthralled with Buzz Lightyear and kept making buzzing noises throughout the rest of the day.

By the time they made it back to the hotel, all four of them were exhausted and starving. They decided to dine in the hotel restaurant, rather than wait for room service. It was there that Logan again encountered Major Mike Simmons. He and his boys were sitting at the table next to theirs. Sheppard was very nearly stunned when he saw them and leaned over to whisper to Logan.

"You're right...He really does look...familiar," he whispered.

"Mike, this is my husband, John and our daughter, Chelsea. Nic, you already know," Logan introduced them.

Mike and Sheppard shook hands, each eyeing the other curiously.

"My sons, Matt and Ryan. Boys, say hello to Colonel Sheppard and Colonel Sheppard," he chuckled.

"I actually go by Devane at work... Less confusing that way," she smiled and shrugged.

"So, where are you stationed, Mike?" Sheppard asked.

"Twenty-Nine Palms, right now, but I'm hoping for a transfer soon."

"Have we met before?" Sheppard asked, unable to shake the odd feeling of deja-vu.

"Logan asked me the same thing and, no... We haven't met."

"You seem awful familiar to me," Sheppard told him.

"Likewise," Mike replied.

When dinner arrived, they stopped chatting and everyone devoured their meals. When they were through, the children were very nearly falling asleep in their seats, so they had to excuse themselves to get them into bed. As it turned out, they were all on the same floor, so they shared an elevator ride up to the tenth floor and went their separate ways.

They quickly got the children washed up and dressed for bed and both of them were asleep as soon as their little heads hit the pillows. They watched them sleeping for a few moments, reveling in the joy of having them safe and happy and back in their arms. Sheppard made sure the doors were locked and secured then joined Logan in the shower. As tired as they were, they were never too tired, it seemed, to make love. It had been several weeks, actually, since the last time they had and they were hungry for it. Since they'd been together, they had never gone this long without making love before; except of course for that dark period when she'd been stranded with Mitchell for so long.

After their heated interlude in the shower, they checked on the children and then crawled into bed and made love again before falling asleep in each other's arms. The following morning, she went downstairs to have a quick workout in the hotel gym while Sheppard wrangled the children. As she was leaving the gym, she once again bumped into Mike Simmons. He seemed oddly pensive, however, so Logan decided to come right out and ask him.

"Tell me, Mike, why is it that you seem so familiar, yet we've never met?"

He studied her carefully for a moment before answering. "I have an idea about that."

"Care to share?" she prodded.

"You mentioned that you've known your husband since childhood?"

"Yes, more like since birth actually, why?"

"Sheppard isn't exactly an unusual name, but it caught my attention."

"Because...?" she prodded.

"You... If I mentioned the name Colonel Thomas Sheppard to you..."

At that, Logan suddenly gasped as she realized just why this man seemed so familiar to her.

"I see you do know the name," he smiled warily.

"I... Oh my God..." she stammered and turned to go look out the window.

"How is it that YOU know the name, Logan?" he prodded.

She looked up at him. "Something tells me you already know the answer to that. Tom Sheppard is... _was_ John's father. God... It's so obvious now, I can't believe I didn't SEE it," she said looking into the familiar green eyes. "He was YOUR father, too, wasn't he?"

Mike said nothing, but responded by nodding his head affirmatively.

"How can that... I've known Tom Sheppard all my... I GREW UP with him... With John... He never would have... But you..." she looked up at him questioningly. "You look... just like he did... at your age. And your boys... They look so much like John when he was their age. How could I not see it right away?"

"I think you did, Logan. The second you laid eyes on me you thought you knew me."

"Yeah, but... I couldn't have imagined that... If Tom were a different kind of man, maybe, but... There's no way he would ever..." She was so stunned she couldn't form a complete sentence.

"Let me help you out here. Tom Sheppard was my birth father. I was adopted."

"He would never..." she trailed off, shaking her head.

"My biological parents were only sixteen years old when I was born," he explained.

"He would never have given you away!" she insisted.

"From what I understand, he was never told about me. Apparently, my biological mother's parents weren't too fond of him and strongly disapproved of their relationship. When she turned up pregnant, they shipped her off to some boarding school or something and he was never the wiser."

"I... Now THAT I can believe. If Tom Sheppard knew he had another child out there somewhere, he would have moved mountains to find you. He would have demanded custody or at least visitation. He never would have abandoned you. In fact, they were devastated that they couldn't have any more children after John was born."

"Well, I guess that's somewhat comforting to know. I understand he passed away a while ago?" he asked, disappointment in his eyes.

"Yes..." she paused. "He did... We miss him terribly. He never knew his grandchildren, they were born after he died."

"So he was a good man? I mean, I have his service record, but you can only tell so much from that. He seemed to be well-liked and respected."

"He was."

"Big on family?"

"Very. He... told us before he passed away that he wanted us to have lots of children..." she paused and looked up at him again. "God... This is so... I'm sorry... this is so surreal."

"For me, too. I only learned all of this about six months ago, shortly before my adoptive mother passed away."

"I'm sorry."

"Thank you. She told me who my biological parents were and then I went digging from there. Imagine my surprise, when the very man I'd been looking for, for months, ended up crossing my path at Disneyland of all places! I was getting nowhere with the millitary."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"All I could get was Tom's service record and the information that his only survivor was a son by the name of John, who also happened to be in the Air Force. I couldn't get any intel on John himself..."

"Our work is extremely classified," she nodded.

"I gathered that when I kept running up against a brick wall. When I met you, and you mentioned Cheyenne Mountain, that brick wall made more sense."

"How so?"

"I don't know any of the details, but I have run across references to a top secret project being run out of that base, numerous times. That transfer I told you I was hoping for? I put in for Cheyenne Mountain," he informed her.

"Something tells me you know a lot more than what a few references would give you, if you want to be transferred there so badly."

He chuckled softly and arched an eyebrow at her. "And something tells me that you and John are smack-dab in the middle of it."

"If we were, we certainly couldn't tell you... So... what is it you're looking for, from John, I mean?"

"To be honest, I really don't know. I was beginning to lose hope that I'd actually ever find him. Now? I don't know what I expected in the first place. Maybe just to see him? Talk to him? Learn about our father?"

"John is very big on family, too. I mean, this'll come as quite a shock to him, but..." she trailed off with a wide smile.

"He seems like a great guy, from the little contact I've had with him so far."

"He is. He's the best man I've ever known," her eyes glowed with love.

"Good to know."

"Where are your boys?" she asked.

"Upstairs, with the hotel babysitter."

"We have to go tell John," she told him.

He gasped and took a step back. "Now?"

"Yes... Right now."

Sheppard just sat there, stunned at the news. He, of course, had recognized that there was *something* familiar about Mike Simmons, but until Logan actually spoke the words, he hadn't put it together. Yes, he DID look like his father at that age. Strange that it hadn't jumped right out at him when they first met, but then the mental image he carried in his head of his father was a much older, more seasoned man. Like Logan, he'd initially found it hard to believe that Tom Sheppard had fathered a son before him. But once they explained the circumstances, he was able to let go of the denial and see the truth staring him back in the face.

"I have a brother," he thought to himself.

There was no denying the resemblance between them, or the resemblance between their children. As Logan had told him, the Sheppard genes ran strong. Mike's boys resembled him every bit as much as Sheppard's children looked like him. None of them looked anything like either one of their mothers at all. Logan watched Mike's boys playing with Chelsea and Nic in the other room and shook her head, marveling at the resemblance between the four of them.

Sheppard was taking the news better than she hoped he would. They had both grown up as an only child, so she knew what a gift it was for him to learn he had a brother after all. She didn't expect them to bond and become close overnight, but it was important for Sheppard to form some kind of relationship with his brother, as difficult as logistics made that. It wasn't like they were going to be able to speak regularly, on the phone, the internet or in person, given that they lived in one galaxy and Mike in another. She was glad that, as a military officer, he understood the regs they were forced to abide by, and he understood that Top Secret and Classified really meant just that. If he did get the tansfer he'd requested to Cheyenne Mountain, that would make things much easier, but it all depended on whether or not he got the posting.

Sheppard and Mike were chatting a bit more easily now, asking one another tentative questions, so Logan decided to give them a little privacy and went to play with the children. As fate would have it, Mike had been planning to take his boys to Sea World the following day, just as they were planning to do the same. She decided to take this opportunity to get to know his boys a little better, while she had the chance. Matt was six and Ryan was eight. Both boys seemed to be more seasoned, for lack of a better word, than other children their age, which she suspected, had a lot to do with the death of their mother two years before.

When she came in and sat down, Ryan left his brother playing with Nic and Chelsea while he came over to sit beside her. She smiled down at him warmly and waited for him to make the first move.

"Can I ask you something?" he asked timidly.

"Sure sweetie," she replied.

"Colonel Sheppard and my dad... They're brothers aren't they?" he asked.

Logan hesitated for a moment, not sure how much she should say, or what Mike may have said to them already. "What do you think?" she asked.

"I think they are... I mean... they look a lot alike. Like me and Matt. And (pointing) like Nic and Chels. And my dad has this picture in his wallet, of us when we were little... and Nic looks a lot like us in that picture."

"You're very observant," she noted.

"That's what my dad says," he grinned.

"And what has your dad told you?"

"Not much... He told us before, about him being adopted and maybe having some brothers or sisters out there that he never knew about. I didn't know we were coming here to meet you though."

Logan smiled and put her arm lightly around his shoulders. "Actually, that wasn't planned at all."

"No?"

"Nope. It was a happy accident that we just happened to be here at the same time as you guys and we bumped into each other."

"A happy accident?"

"Yes," she smiled.

"I didn't know there could be happy accidents."

"Now you know. How do you feel about having an Uncle and cousins you never knew about?"

"And an Aunt too... right?"

"Right. Since I'm married to your Uncle, that does make me your Aunt."

"I think it's pretty cool. I like Nic and Chels, even if they are still babies, they're pretty cool."

"We think so," she chuckled.

"I don't have a mom, you know."

Her eyes softened at the sad tone in his voice. "I know, sweetie, I heard. I bet you miss her a lot."

He nodded. "Yeah. But now we have an Aunt... Are you gonna come live with us?" he asked hopefully.

"I'm afraid not, sweetie. We live very, very far away from here, but we can keep in touch."

"Really?"

"Really," she nodded, giving him a reassuring squeeze.

"I think you're really pretty," he said shyly.

"Well, thank you Ryan... and I think you and your brother are VERY handsome. You must have a lot of girlfriends!" she teased.

"Girls are YUCKY!" he said vehemently.

Logan laughed and bent down to whisper conspiratorially in his ear. "You know... Chelsea over there is a girl, and so am I."

"Yeah, but she's my cousin and you're my Aunt, not a girl."

Logan chuckled. "Oh, I stand corrected."

As they chatted, Logan noticed that he seemed to be leaning into her more and more, until his head was nestled against her side. It broke her heart to see how much he missed his mother, and how much he needed a mother-figure in his life. Matt too, for that matter.


	57. Chapter 57

The following day, they all left the resort and headed south to Sea World. Nic and Chelsea had never seen sea life before, of course they were very young, so they really hadn't been exposed to wild-life on the whole. They were a bit nervous when Chelsea, who became totally enchanted with the dolphins, started chattering incessantly about not having any of them in *their* ocean at home. Mike looked over at them quizzically, not quite sure what to make of her slip-up.

"What does she mean *your* ocean back home?" he asked.

Sheppard shrugged and tried to brush it off. "Kids!" he shook his head and tried to distract everyone by pointing out the penguin exhibit. "Oh look! Penguins!" he grabbed Chelsea by the hand and ran ahead of the others.

Mike looked over at Logan. "I wasn't aware that there were any oceans near Cheyenne Mountain, or do you guys have a summer house near the ocean?" he asked.

Logan shrugged. "Something like that, yeah."

"One of those areas I'm not supposed to ask about?"

"Something like that," she smiled to soften the blow.

"Alrighty then... What say we go see the penguins?" he chirped.

Later in the day, they had booked time for the children, with the exception of Nic, to go swimming with the dolphins. Sheppard and Mike accompanied them, since Chelsea couldn't go it alone, and they took turns helping her. She loved the dolphins so much she didn't want to get out when it was time to go. When they were finally able to pry her from the water, a weepy Chelsea once again let slip some information about where they came from.

"Daddy... We have to take them back to Lantea!" she demanded.

This time it was Logan's turn to remove Chelsea from an uncomfortable position. Since she had to get dried off and changed anyway, Logan used that as an excuse and let Sheppard deal with Mike and the boy's inevitable questions.

"Lantea?" Mike asked.

Sheppard shrugged, well aware that Matt and Ryan were also watching him intently, waiting for an answer. "The housing complex where we live," he said simply.

"And they have room for dolphins?" Ryan asked.

Sheppard just shrugged again. "Don't listen to Chels, she wants them to come live in our bathtub!"

The boys laughed and went off to change back into their clothes. Mike studied Sheppard's face for a moment before speaking. "Another one of those things I shouldn't ask about..."

"Right," Sheppard winced. "Sorry man," he added.

"Hey, I understand. I may not have the security clearance you have but I get it."

"Yeah, well... Something tells me you know a lot more about Cheyenne Mountain than you're allowed to say."

"I've heard... a few things..." he admitted.

"Who have you talked to about getting transferred?" Sheppard asked.

"Just my C.O. so far."

"Hmmmm... Maybe an intro to someone higher up might help," Sheppard ventured.

"You don't have to do that, John. If they take me, I want them to do it on my own merits."

"And you will... believe me. All I'm saying is it doesn't hurt to meet the right people."

THREE WEEKS LATER

"Why is it every time you come to Earth, you always leave with a new... (looking pointedly at Logan) acquisition?" O'Neill asked with a grin.

Sheppard shrugged. "Just lucky, I guess, sir."

"Believe me, General, I think we were even more surprised than you were," Logan said.

"Well, I've started looking into his service record, which coincidentally was already on my desk for review by the way. If he's got what it takes, I have no problem bringing him into the SGC."

"He really wants to make it on his own merits, sir," Sheppard began.

"And if he makes it, that WILL be the reason he made it. You haven't twisted my arm," O'Neill assured him.

"Make sure you TELL him that, sir? I don't want him to think that I... that WE had anything to do with it," Sheppard asked.

"Yeah, sure, ya-betcha!" O'Neill winked. "Oh wait... he doesn't do that weird tandem-talking thing you two do, does he?"

"No sir," they replied in unison.

"Excellent." The wormhole engaged and O'Neill turned to look down at Chelsea. He held out his arms to the pint-sized, female version of Sheppard. "C'mere squirt!" he ordered.

Chelsea went willingly into his arms and squealed when he picked her up and spun her around. She hugged him affectionately and thanked him for the art set he gave her.

"You take good care of your parents now, okay squirt?"

"Okay sir," she replied seriously.

"And keep an eye on that baby brother of yours!" he added.

"Aye sir," she saluted smartly, causing O'Neill to grin.

"You two," he said looking at Sheppard and Logan.

"Yes sir?" they replied in unison.

O'Neill shook his head. "Try to stay out of trouble? At least for a little while?"

"Will do, sir!" they replied together.

O'Neill gave Chelsea and Nic a hug and a kiss, then stood at the bottom of the ramp to watch them go. As they disappeared through the event horizon, he turned to look up at the control room where Hammond and Landry were watching. Time to get back to reviewing those files. Sheppard hadn't tried to use his influence to get his brother transferred to the SGC, and he could have. All he did was mention that he'd learned about his brother's existence, what the circumstances were and that Mike Simmons had already put in for the transfer.

He had to admire Sheppard's restraint, Logan's too, for that matter. If Mike Simmons turned out to be anything like his younger brother, O'Neill WANTED him for the program. Men like Sheppard were hard to find. Of greater interest, at least from a strategic point of view, would be to find out if Mike Simmons possessed the Ancient Gene, as Sheppard did. If he did, and if he were able to operate Ancient technology as effortlessly as Sheppard, he would be a great asset to Earth's defenses. The chair weapon had been moved from Antarctica to the SGC, where it would be more readily available in the event of an attack from space.

O'Neill sighed deeply and resolved to get down to business. He was actually looking forward, now, to meeting at least ONE of the candidates they'd be considering for posts at the SGC.

ATLANTIS

All was quiet and rosy for several weeks after the Sheppard family returned home to Atlantis. They had plenty of pictures and souvenirs to share with their friends and colleagues, along with the news that Sheppard now had a brother. They were as stunned as he and Logan had been, but as long as he was happy about it, they were happy for him. They marveled at how similar the two men were in appearance, and how much the children resembled their respective fathers. They all found it funny that Mike Simmons was also in the military, though as a Marine, rather than Air Force, and that he might one day wind up at the SGC. Caldwell promised to notify Sheppard the moment he heard, one way or the other, about Simmons transfer.

It didn't take long for them to get back into their regular routine, Sheppard leading off-world missions, and Logan oveseeing security. The children were thriving, happy and loved. Sheppard had even broached the subject of possibly adding to their brood, taking Logan completely by surprise, which was not an easy thing to do, considering how well they knew one another. For her part, Logan definitely wanted more children, but young Nicolas was only a year old, and she wanted to wait at least another year before trying for another baby. They'd had Chelsea and Nic so close together, she thought it might be a good idea to have at least two years between pregnancies this time. Sheppard was fine with this, especially when Logan pointed out how much fun they could have "practicing" to conceive their third child.

As it happened, though, the people of Atlantis were happy to celebrate the news that Teal'c and Teyla were expecting THEIR first child together. Hope was overjoyed at the idea of having a baby brother or sister, as she'd been beginning to believe that her parents would never have a baby! With that joyous news, Logan and Sheppard were happy that they'd decided to put off having another child for a year, barring any unforseen "accidents" that might happen.

On the heels of Teal'c and Teyla's news, came the news that Tarik and Weir were also expecting their first child as well. Atlantis was rapidly becoming less a military base and more a colony with each new addition. That being understood, O'Neill and Hammond thought it wise to begin treating it as such by moving a few more civilians into the mix. Scientists and contractors and the like, as well as their families. School teachers would be added, as the Atlantis children were growing fast and those who were already school-age needed a more formal education than they were currently receiving. And with all the other outposts they'd established in Pegasus, it was no loonger necessary to keep Atlantis as a strictly military facility. The news was welcomed by those who had been in Pegasus for so long, as well as those who had recently arrived. For many, the idea of raising their families there, in Pegasus, was extremely appealing.

Sheppard and Logan secretly hoped that one day, Mike Simmons and his sons would also come to live there. Mitchell, while ecstatic for Sheppard, was also somewhat... saddened... almost, at the thought that Simmons would likely take his place, in a manner of speaking, with the Sheppard family. He knew it was juvenile on his part, but over the years, he'd come to think of John Sheppard as a brother and not just as a friend. They'd gotten to a place where Mitchell's feelings for Logan were an understood and accepted state of being, one that never came between them. Mitchell's love and devotion to the children was without bounds or conditions. If Mike Simmons became part of their every day life, where would he fit in? He struggled with his inner child for days before it finally dawned on him that he would always have a place with them, no matter who else came into the picture. He felt downright foolish when he looked back and realized something he already knew, but had allowed himself to forget (for a short time): They loved and valued him just as much as he did them.

Within a month, Mike Simmons was cleared to work at the SGC, as expected. He did indeed have the same ancient gene as Sheppard and seemed to be able to operate ancient technology almost as effortlessly as Sheppard. His first two weeks at the SGC were spent learning and training on the ancient technology. He would be one of the men who would operate Earth's ancient defenses in the event of an attack. For his part, Simmons couldn't remember ever feeling so happy or fulfilled in his work as he was since coming to the SGC. His boys were happy in their new home and in the base school they attended at Cheyenne Mountain.

What he'd found curious, at first, was the fact that Logan and Sheppard were not there. It took him a few days to get up the courage to ask, but General Landry had been expecting the question, knowing the familial ties there, and he was happy to share the information with him. Simmons already knew that they had several off-world sites, or outposts, but he was a little surprised to find out that his brother and sister-in-law were posted off-world. That, he thought, would explain Chelsea's comment about not having dolphins in *their* ocean.

After his first two weeks, Simmons was granted a 24-hour leave to go and visit with his off-world family, and even to take his two sons with him, provided they were blindfolded prior to entering the gateroom. Such a secret was far too big to expect young boys to keep from their friends. The day they were to leave, Simmons explained to the boys about the need for security, a concept they pretty much understood, and the reasons why they would need to be blindfolded for a short time. They thought it a great adventure and they were eager to see their new family members again.

The three of them waited outside the gateroom while the stargate was dialed and did not enter the room until their blindfolds were secure and the wormhole had been established. Even after the past few weeks, Simmons found himself somewhat awestruck by the wonder of gate travel to other worlds. He'd never been through the gate before, but he'd been assured that it would be smooth sailing. Landry was there to see them off, and even helped lead one of the boys up to the open wormhole, since he couldn't see. Simmons saluted Landry, then took each boy by the hand and led them through the event horizon. A heartbeat later, the three of them stumbled through the other side, emerging in the Atlantis gateroom. Weir and Caldwell stood there, smiling, to welcome them.

"Major Simmons, I presume?" Weir said.

"I... yes, ma'am," he stammered, then saluted General Caldwell.

"Welcome to Atlantis, Major. If you'll follow us, we'll get you settled in your quarters."

"Yes sir," he replied, keeping a tight grip on his boys' hands.

Once they left the gateroom, the boys were allowed to remove their blindfolds and they looked around in awe at everything they were seeing. They were well disciplined enough that they didn't speak or cry out with excitement at what they were seeing, at least not in front of the General.

"These are my sons, Ryan and Matt, sir. Boys, say hello to General Caldwell and Dr. Weir."

"Hello," they chimed together.

Weir and Caldwell couldn't help but laugh at that, causing Simmons to look at them curiously. "You'll have to forgive us, Major... The boys... Well, they kind of reminded us of Logan and your brother," she chuckled softly.

"How so?" he asked.

"Let's just say they tend to talk in stereo... a lot. Do your boys usually do that?"

"All the time," he shook his head.

"We're used to it," Weir smiled.

"May I ask... where are my brother and Colonel Devane?"

"They'll be here shortly," Caldwell replied. "We thought it would be nice to surprise them."

"Oh," Simmons shrugged.

They were led to spacious quarters, in the same wing where Logan and Sheppard were housed. Simmons couldn't believe his eyes when the doors opened and he looked around. This was far better than any quarters he'd lived in during his military career. He shook his head and marveled at how fortunate his brother was to have gotten such a sweet post as this one. A few moments later, the doors opened again and Logan and Sheppard stepped through.

"You wanted to see us, sir?" Logan and Sheppard said in unison.

Caldwell stifled a grin and then pointed behind them. "Actually, THEY wanted to see you."

Logan and Sheppard turned and gasped when they saw Simmons and the boys. "Mike?!" they chimed in unison.

"Hey guys! Long time no see!" he grinned.

"Aunt Logan, Uncle John!" the boys called out and rushed forward to hug them.

"Boys!" they chimed together again.

Logan and Sheppard turned to see Weir and Caldwell grinning at them.

"Surprise!"

"Yeah... How...?" Sheppard stammered.

"We figured it might be nice, seeing as how your brother is now working at the SGC. It'll make it easier for you guys to stay in touch," Weir explained.

"Thank you," Sheppard murmured gratefully.

"We'll leave you to get reacquainted with the family, but we expect to see you all at dinner tonight," Caldwell informed them.

"Yes sir," all three officers chimed as one.

After they'd gone, Sheppard turned back to his brother. "How long can you stay?"

"They only gave us 24 hours, but it's better than nothing at all, and incredibly generous of them."

"Yeah... Well... What do you think of the place?" Sheppard beamed at him.

"It's incredible... And you've been here..."

"A LONG time!" Logan finished for him.

"This is... This is unbelievable!"

"It's home...to us..." Sheppard smiled contentedly down at his wife.

"Couldn't imagine living any place else," she agreed.

"I can see why," Simmons chuckled.

"Where's Chels and Nic?" Ryan asked.

"They're in the nursery. Shall we go and get them?" Logan replied.

"Yeah!" The boys chimed together.

By dinnertime they'd shown Simmons and the boys as much of Atlantis as they could without showing the boys TOO much. Simmons was simply dumbfounded by the splendor of the place. He thought he had it good at the SGC, and he did, but he knew that one day he too wanted to be posted at Atlantis. One day, after he'd proven himself at the SGC. He felt like a kid at Christmas when Sheppard took him for a spin around the planet in one of the jumpers, and then even allowed him to fly it himself for a little while. He was a pilot himself, but nowhere near as seasoned a pilot as Sheppard. Sheppard was dying to take the boys up, just to see their reaction, but that was one of those things they knew would be unfair to expect them to keep quiet about. What boy in his right mind wouldn't be bragging profusely about flying around in a spaceship?!

Logan had kept the boys busy in the city while he and Simmons were out flying. She introduced them to all their friends and colleagues and even took them for a swim off the east pier, with Mitchell along to help her out. He kept a close watch on Nic and Chelsea while she swam with Ryan and Matt and then they traded off. Chelsea was eager to swim with the big boys, so Logan kept Nic with her while Mitchell carried Chelsea around on his back. All in all, they had a wonderful time. The boys really liked Mitchell, something that didn't surprise her a bit, and they proclaimed him the coolest soldier they knew... After their father and Uncle, of course.

As Sheppard led them to the mess for dinner, everyone was tired, hungry and excited. The boys saw Mitchell and dragged him over to their table to join them. Simmons could see that Mitchell, Logan and Sheppard were all very close, and his niece and nephew fairly worshipped the man, so he knew Mitchell had to be a good man. It irked him somewhat, from a purely juvenile point of view, that Mitchell and his brother were so close. He envied that closeness, and the time they'd spent together, wishing that he'd met his brother sooner in life. The more adult part of him realized, though, that it was normal for them to have formed the bond they had over the years. After the experiences they'd shared and the threats they'd endured, it was natural for people to develop close bonds under those circumstances. Some of his own closest friendships had been born during deployments.

He'd been surprised to learn, from Sheppard, that Mitchell had been the one to deliver Chelsea, and the circumstances that surrounded her birth. To have been separated from Logan for so long, especially during her first pregnancy, it had to be hell for him. He even worked up the courage to ask his brother how he'd been able to handle the closeness that had developed between Logan and Mitchell as a result of that experience.

Sheppard shrugged and chuckled a bit. "It was hard alright. At first. But, he took care of them, protected them... I owed him for that. Took me a while to let go of the other stuff and focus on just the gratitude, but once I did, it brought us even closer together."

"That's great. Not sure I could have been so... gracious... in your place though."

"No?"

"No disrespect intended here bro, but Logan is... Well... You gotta admit, he had to have been hard-pressed not to... develop feelings for her during all that time."

Sheppard nodded. "Yeah, well I've been watching guys fall at her feet all our lives. A lot of them have been jerks, of course, but Cameron... He's a true friend, Mike. Whatever his feelings for Logan, he'd never betray our friendship."

"I'm glad you have a friend like that, John. That's very rare."

"I know. Logan has been there, literally from birth and the only one I really let in. I mean, REALLY close. I had plenty of friends back on Earth, but no one like her. Cam Mitchell is the only other person I ever let get anywhere near as close to me as Logan has always been."

Simmons nodded.

"And now... I have a brother!" Sheppard grinned.

Simmons grinned back. "I hope one day we can be that close."

"I think we can," Sheppard admitted.

"Good to know," Simmons said.

Dinner was a festive affair and all the children were exhausted by the time they finished their meals. Chelsea had crawled into Mitchell's lap and was falling asleep and Nic was already fast asleep in Simmons' arms. Matt was resting his head against Logan's side, desperately fighting off sleep and Ryan was doing his level best to stay awake and involved in the conversation between Mitchell, Sheppard and Simmons. It made him feel special, and quite grownup, that they were including him in the conversation.

Soon enough, though, it was time for bed. Mitchell offered to carry Chelsea back to their quarters, so Sheppard took the slumbering form of his son from Simmons' arms. They all walked back to their quarters together and the boys were pleading with their father to be allowed to sleep in their cousin's rooms that night. Logan and Sheppard exchanged glances, each knowing what the other would say, and Logan told Simmons they would love to keep the boys overnight. It would give him a chance to explore Atlantis some more without worrying about the boys. He thanked them graciously, after offering them an out, and accepted their offer. He'd actually been hoping that he'd be able to run into the lovely Doctor they'd introduced him to earlier.

After they got the kids settled in for the night, Logan shooed them all, Mitchell, Sheppard and Simmons, out of their quarters for some quality male bonding time. Sheppard felt guilty leaving her there with all the children, but she assured him that it was perfectly fine with her. They were all asleep, after all, and she wanted him to be able to spend some more time with his brother before they had to go back to Earth the next day. Logan would catch up with some reports she had to write and then go to bed.

Sheppard leered hungrily at her. "Save me a place?" he murmured softly.

"Don't I always?" she smiled seductively as the heat sprang up between them.

Mitchell was in checking on the children, so he missed the heated exchange between Logan and Sheppard, but Simmons caught it and knew he'd never been so envious of another man in his life. When Logan excused herself, Simmons looked over at his brother and shook his head.

"What?" Sheppard grinned stupidly.

"Bro... I don't know how you manage to tear yourself away from that woman!"

Sheppard looked over his shoulder, continuing to grin broadly. "It ain't easy, man... But knowing that I have HER to come home to... It just makes life that much sweeter!"

"You are one lucky S.O.B., you know that?" Simmons shook his head.

"I sure do!"


	58. Chapter 58

SEVERAL MONTHS LATER

"Colonel Devane to the control room!"

Logan jumped when the call came over the city-wide. Bates' voice seemed rather tense when he made the call, so she knew it had to be bad. She was already on her way there, so it didn't take her long to make it all the way at a sprint.

"What is it?" she asked, looking around for signs of trouble.

"Not here, ma'am. It's SG-1, but..."

"What?"

"It's some woman, we have audio only."

"What the... put her through," Logan ordered, keying her mic. "Colonel Mitchell are you reporting an emergency?"

"I am Enara of the Vollians. I am calling on behalf of the one called Mitchell. Listen carefully, for I will not repeat this: The one called Mitchell is ill and requires medical attention. He has refused the assistance of our healer and is instead calling for the one called Logan. We have granted this request, but know this: ONLY the one called Logan may come here and tend to Mitchell. Anyone else caught trying to come through will be captured and killed."

Logan stared at the others incredulously. "He asked for Logan and not for either Dr. Beckett or Dr. Fraser?" she asked.

"He was very specific, despite his rising fever. What is your answer?"

Weir and Caldwell exchanged dubious glances. The last thing they wanted to do was let Logan go into hostile territory, alone and unarmed. But they both recognized the stubborn set to her jaw and knew they were in for a fight.

"Can you tell us what has made Mitchell ill?" Logan asked.

"We are unsure."

"I... We need to know what medical supplies to bring..." she insisted.

"We cannot help you there."

"Logan... You know I can't let you do this," Caldwell warned.

"General... You know I have to... I can't just... There has to be some reason he asked for me specifically..." she pointed out.

"Like?"

"He... maybe he knows that I could get him out of a bad situation where neither Beckett or Janet could... He wouldn't put me in jeopardy..."

"I'd say this qualifies as jeopardy!" he snapped.

"Where are the other members of SG-1?" Weir asked Enara.

"If you are referring to the three people who were with Mitchell, they will be sent back where they came from unharmed."

"Then why not send Mitchell back, too?" Logan asked.

"I'm afraid that is quite impossible."

"Why?" she prodded.

"It will be explained when the one called Logan arrives. You have our word that Logan will be returned unharmed once Mitchell has suffiently recovered."

"And we're just supposed to trust you on that?" Caldwell scoffed.

"I am afraid you have little choice. What is your answer?"

Logan looked pleadingly at Caldwell. "Please sir... Whatever is going on there, Colonel Mitchell must believe that I can handle it and get us both out."

"Colonel..." he trailed off warily.

"Please sir..." she pleaded.

He knew Logan would never forgive him if he refused and something happened to Mitchell, or God forbid, if he died. But he had to weigh that against putting yet another of his Colonel's, a highly valued member of his staff at that, in harms way. He looked over at Weir for support, but saw the same question in her eyes. In the end, he relented, against his better professional judgement, and decided to let her go.

"Alright, Colonel... With conditions!" he added.

Weir keyed her mic and informed Enara that they would be sending Logan as soon as they gathered up all necessary medical supplies.

"Name your conditions, sir," Logan said.

"First off, you wear a tracking device. Secondly, we find some way to hide some weapons you can use, if necessary. Third, you will have a backup radio hidden in with the supplies, in case they take your primary one away. Fourth, you are to report in every thirty minutes..."

"If they let me," Logan reminded him.

"And fifth, I'm sending the Daedalus out right now. It'll take a while for them to get there, but they'll be able to pull you both out if you're unable to extricate yourselves."

"Agreed," Logan said distractedly.

"Head down to the infirmary and collect everything you and Beckett think you might need."

"Yes sir," she excused herself and bolted from the gateroom.

Weir looked up at Caldwell sympathetically. "Which one of us gets to tell Sheppard that we let her go?"

Caldwell shook his head. "Hopefully we'll have them both back before Sheppard returns from his mission."

"And what do you think the odds are on that?" she asked.

Caldwell shrugged. "Not good," he admitted.

Within fifteen minutes Logan had everything together that she might need. Everything she and Beckett could think of anyway. She promised to call Beckett and describe Mitchell's symptoms as soon as she could assess his condition, and if the Vollians allowed her to. She quickly went and kissed the children goodbye, they were both napping, so no explanations were necessary at this time, then went straight to the gateroom.

A few moments later, Caldwell and Weir grimly watched Logan disappear into the open wormhole, each hoping that Sheppard wouldn't return until Logan had returned safely. As soon as she stepped through onto Volla, Logan was instantly surrounded by a dozen armed warriors. She did as she was told and did not try to fight them as they searched first her, then the supplies she carried with her. The moment the wormhole closed behind her, one of the men immediately began dialing the gate again and she gasped to see Carter, Teal'c and Daniel bound, gagged and blindfolded, being led out of the trees to her right.

"Hi guys," she greeted, letting them know she was there.

"Logan?" Daniel asked.

"Yeah. You guys okay?" she asked.

"We're fine," Carter assured her.

"Where is Mitchell?" Logan asked.

"We do not know, Logan Devane. We were separated from him when..."

"Enough!" the warrior commanded sharply as he grabbed Carter and thrust her IDC device into her hands. "Send your signal and be on your way. We are people of our word."

Carter stood there, clearly torn about what to do.

"Go, Colonel. I'll see to Mitchell. The others are expecting you," Logan assured her.

"I..."

"Go. All of you," Logan prodded.

"They have been refusing to leave before this, without the one called Mitchell," the warrior informed her.

"We have this thing about not leaving our people behind," Logan explained.

"So they said."

"Go. Now," Logan insisted.

After a moment, Carter took a step forward and the others fell into line with her. Daniel hesitated before stepping through the event horizon. "Logan..."

"I'll be fine, Daniel. No one is going to hurt me, they want me to help Mitchell. Now go!" she insisted.

With that, Daniel stepped through and they were gone. Logan turned to the warrior. "Now, take me to Mitchell."

Enara studied her coldly. "Who are you?"

"She is the one called Logan," the warrior replied.

Enara's eyes flashed angrily. "Is this true?"

"Yes."

"The others did call her by that name before they left."

"Mitchell neglected to mention that you were a woman," she said disdainfully.

"He probably has a few other things on his mind right now," Logan reminded her.

"Indeed. You ARE a healer, are you not?"

"Something like that," Logan replied. "Now, if you'll take me to Mitchell, we can see about fixing whatever is wrong with him."

"You are not even curious about the reason Mitchell is not permitted to leave?"

"Sure I am. But right now I'm more concerned about making sure he's alright, so if you'll take me to him?"

"Very well. Perhaps Mitchell should be the one to tell you anyway."

Enara led her down the hall and around the corner. She was surprised at the opulence of the room but didn't say anything. Mitchell was ensconced in a huge bed, ornately carved and covered by big, fluffy blankets. She could see the fever in his eyes, even from five feet away. He was shivering under all those blankets and his voice was scratchy as he moaned and obliviously called out her name.

"Logan..." he groaned miserably.

"Hey, Space Cowboy..." she called out to him.

He was delirious with fever, but the sound of her voice brought an instant reaction. "Logan..."

Enara motioned her over to the bed and sent her servants away. Logan quickly crawled up onto the bed and pulled the blankets down. they had him dressed in some heavy woolen robe and Logan shook her head. "Nononono...Are you TRYING to kill him?!" she asked angrily.

"What?" Enara asked, suddenly alarmed.

"Why do you have all these blankets on him? And this ridiculously heavy robe?" she snapped.

"He was cold," she said defensively.

"He has a fever!" Logan snapped again. "You're making it worse by covering him like this!"

She pulled all the blankets, save one, completely off him, then set about removing the robe encasing him. Mitchell shivered more violently as she did this, but she didn't let that stop her. Enara gasped as she saw Mitchell's skin being bared before her eyes and turned away.

"What's your problem?" Logan asked testily.

"I am not permitted to see him... thus...Not yet..." she replied.

"Whatever," Logan growled as she continued stripping Mitchell down to just his pants.

When she was done, she chose one light blanket to cover him and then began checking his vital signs.

"Logan..." Mitchell groaned.

"I'm right here, Cam... Can you open your eyes for me?" she cooed. When he didn't respond, she began to worry. "Come on baby, don't do this to me... Open those gorgeous big blue eyes for me..."

ATLANTIS

"What?!" Caldwell bellowed.

Carter looked up at him, deeply mortified at what had happened back on Volla. "I'm afraid so, sir. They had us surrounded before we knew what was happening - it was so...sudden..."

"There was nothing we could do or say to talk them out of it," Daniel added.

"Sonofa..." Caldwell muttered, turning away. "So we sent the absolute worst person in there that we could have?"

"Possibly..." Carter admitted.

"And you're sure Mitchell did nothing to... encourage... this?" he asked.

"Yes sir. He barely spoke while we were there, and he never so much as even looked at Enara."

"Well, there's nothing we can do about it right now... The Daedalus is enroute and they can pull them both out when they get there. Colonel Devane has a tracker on her. Do any of you know what's wrong with Mitchell?"

"No sir... Once we were captured, the three of us were isolated from him. They told us he was sick, but nothing else. They had me dial in here and then they locked me back up with the others. The only reason I DID dial in was because they told me Mitchell needed a doctor... I thought you'd send Beckett or Fraser, though."

Caldwell nodded. "Mitchell asked for Logan."

They exchanged curious glances. "He must have figured she had a better shot at freeing them than either Beckett or Fraser," Carter pointed out.

"That's exactly what Logan said," Caldwell winced.

VOLLA

Logan worked ferociously to bring Mitchell's fever down. She had no clue what was causing his illness, but he was in bad shape. After drawing blood, she called Enara over and handed her the vials.

"Please, send this back to my people. They can analyze it there and maybe come up with the right medicine to treat him."

"You do not know what is wrong with him?" Enara asked.

"No... It could be a number of things. I need... help... to figure out what's wrong. Please... If you care about him at all, you will send those through to my people and let me speak with the other healers on my world."

"No one else may come."

"I understand that, but the equipment I need is THERE. Let me speak to my people, please."

Enara hesitated for a moment and looked over at Mitchell. He was shivering and tossing around fitfully in his sleep. "Very well," she agreed, handing Logan her radio. "I will let you know when the circle has been activated.

"Thank you," Logan smiled appreciatively.

Enara left and Logan set about trying to bring Mitchell back to a conscious state. "Come on Cam..." she murmured softly. "Wake up, please?"

It took another ten minutes for Enara to return and inform her that the gate was opened.

"General Caldwell?" she asked, keying her mic.

"Yes?"

"I need to speak with Dr. Beckett right away," she requested.

"Right here, Colonel," came Beckett's reassuring voice. "What have you got so far?"

"His fever is extremely high - 105 right now. I'm doing everything I can think of to bring it down, but it's not working."

"You need to get some fluids into him then," Beckett began. "Can you start an IV?"

"Sure... Any other suggestions?"

"Not right now. We're rushing the blood sample you just sent through to the lab so we should have some answers for you soon. In the meantime, what are his other symptoms?"

Logan recited everything to Beckett, then thought to check one more thing. "You don't suppose he's been bitten by something, do you? I mean, it doesn't seem to be anything he ate, and no one else is sick here."

"Could be... Do you see any marks on him?" Beckett asked.

"Lemme check," Logan muttered as she began checking his body for signs of any type of bite or wound.

"What are you doing?" Enara gasped indignantly.

"I'm checking to make sure he wasn't bitten by some kind of bug or something!" she hissed.

Enara turned away. "You take liberties with this man... You are not..."

"Oh please!" Logan interrupted her. "It's not like I haven't seen him before!"

Enara's eyes grew wide and angry. "What do you mean?"

"Aha! There..." She saw a large red welt on Mitchell's leg, just above the ankle, where his boot would end. There were red streaks leading from the site, letting her know that poison had been released into his system, and she informed Beckett of what she found. As she turned and her eyes met Enara's, Logan paused as it suddenly dawned on her exactly what was going on. Enara wanted Mitchell for herself!

"He didn't tell you?" Logan asked, a wicked glint in her eye.

"I am not permitted, by our laws, to speak directly to him. Why? What is it you think I should know?" she asked, her eyes narrowing suspiciously.

"This man... He is my... mate..." There. She'd stepped in it now.

"YOUR mate?! But he was to be mine!" Enara cried.

"Why do you think he calls out for me? We have other, more skilled healers," Logan taunted, trying not to smile at the expression on her face. She was enjoying this far more than she should, under the circumstances.

"He... never told the holy ones he was spoken for."

"He... WE... generally don't give away personal information about ourselves." She was taking a huge risk, angering Enara the way she was. But she felt extremely protective of Mitchell. And what WAS it with the women in this galaxy who always felt the need to take a mate by force?!

"The decision has already been made. You are on our world now, and you must abide by our laws."

"If you're telling me that your laws require me to relinquish my mate..." Logan trailed off questioningly. Of _course_ that's what she was telling her.

Enara held up a hand. "We will leave this up to the council."

She waited until Enara walked away before popping off. "Council-schmouncil... Not planning on being here that long cupcake!"

Logan was busy tying a tourniquet around Mitchell's leg when she heard him moan and felt him stir.

"Logan..."

She plastered her brightest smile on her face and climbed up next to him. "Hey Space Cowboy," she chirped.

Mitchell was struggling to regain full consciousness. "Lo...?"

"Wake up, Cam... Open your eyes for me," she pleaded.

"Logan?" he croaked hoarsely.

"Can you open your eyes for me?" she prodded.

"Hurts," he said.

"I know, sweetie, but I need you to focus, okay?" she murmured softly, gently caressing his face.

"Really you?" he asked.

"You've gotta open your eyes and see for yourself..." she insisted.

"Dreaming," he mumbled.

"I'm here, Cam... And I promise, I'm gonna get you out of here."

"Dream..." he murmured, starting to drift off again.

Logan forced down a rising sense of panic and reached out to take his face in her hands. "NO! No, Cam, you're not dreaming, this is real. I'M real. Now, you stay with me, okay?"

"Logan..."

"Cameron Mitchell... You open your eyes, flyboy, and acknowledge!" she ordered forcefully.

Mitchell's eyes snapped open and he tried to focus on her.

"That's it, flyboy, look at me...Now focus..."

He tried to concentrate on her face and after a moment or two, her face came into clearer focus. "Lo?"

"Yeah," she smiled, reaching out to caress his face again. "Stay with me, okay?"

"Kay..." he croaked.

"Think you can swallow some water?" she asked.

"Thirsty," he nodded weakly.

Logan lifted his head and let a few drops of water trickle slowly into his mouth. It took a while but she managed to get a significant amount of water into him, which she hoped would help with his fever. Mitchell smiled gratefully up at her, and reached up to brush her cheek with his fingers.

"Thanks," he murmured weakly.

"You're welcome, hon... Cam?"

"Mmmhmm?"

"Did you see what it was that bit you?" she asked.

He looked puzzled for a moment before answering. "Oh... yeah... Big, ugly... black thing."

"Like a spider?"

"Not really... Not so many legs... Hurt like hell..." he mumbled.

"Where were you when it bit you?"

"Courtyard... Still there... maybe... Went down fast..." he started coughing and couldn't finish what he was saying.

Logan held his head while he coughed, but called to the guards to go out to the courtyard and see if they could find the bug that had bitten him. She handed them a containment jar and asked them to put it in there so she could send it back for analysis. When they'd gone, she turned her full attention back to Mitchell, who was looking up at her curiously.

"Logan... Dammit baby... What are you _doing_ here?" he asked, suddenly deeply concerned.

"You don't remember?" she replied.

"No..."

"You asked for me..." she reminded him.

"I did? No... I wouldn't... not you... these people are nuts..." he warned her.

"Yeah, I get that... I hear you've captured the heart of the local... princess, is it?" she teased him.

Mitchell winced and looked away. "Never even talked...her..." he croaked.

"Yeah well, you know, a guy who looks like you, sometimes all you gotta do is smile and they drop at your feet," she teased.

"Not you..." he rasped absenty.

"I'm here, aren't I? You don't think I'm gonna let some spoiled little princess steal you away and have her way with you without a fight, do you?"

His eyes widened at that. "Logan... NO! Ritual... You have to... go!" he gasped in horror.

"Not gonna happen, flyboy. Now don't you go getting all worked up, I'm trying to get your fever down. Everything is under control and help is on the way, so don't worry."

"Didn't ask... for... you," he murmured rapidly fading again.

"They told me you did. We figured it was because you knew I stood a better chance of getting you out than Beckett or Frasier. I _am_ a little faster on my feet, you know."

"Didn't... wouldn't... put you... danger..." he stammered, on the verge of panic.

"Everything's fine, Cam, so hush. Can you drink some more water for me?" she cooed.

He nodded weakly and let her pour the water down his throat. Things were getting fuzzy again, but he needed to tell her. He HAD to warn her what would happen if she interfered with their plans. The darkness was beginning to crash down on him again and he was finding it hard to speak.

"Cam?" She could see him physically weaken before her eyes. "Cameron!" she cried.

"Logan..." he croaked.

"Stay with me!" she demanded. "Cam! Stay with me!"

"Can't..."

"Yes you can! Now you suck it up, Colonel, and you hang tough. You're NOT going to let some little bug get the better of you."

"Sorry..."

"No! I won't let you go! We NEED you! The children need you! Chelsea's back home right now, waiting for you. And Nic, you promised to take him swimming, remember? Please, Cam, you have to fight!" Tears were streaming down her face as she pleaded with him.

Even in his weakened state, he managed to reach out and cup her face in his hand. "So...beautiful..." he murmured.

"Thanks... So are you... and strong and determined. We need you to fight Cam, you've got to fight."

"You... I need... to tell you..." he mumbled.

"Tell me when we get back home!" she demanded.

"No... Have to... before..." he rasped.

"Cameron please!" she begged.

"I...love...you..."

"I love you, too, flyboy, and I need you, so stay with us!" she told him.

"Kids... John...too..." he mumbled.

"We know, sweetie, and we don't want to lose you."

"Sweetest thing...ever...was...your...kiss..." he stammered.

"That's nice of you to say..."

"Truth..."

"Shhhhhh..." she whispered, stroking his hair.

"One more?" he murmured.

"One more... what?"

"One more... before I... go..." he pleaded.

"You're not going anywhere, flyboy, do you _hear_ me?" she said vehemently.

He reached up and pulled her down until her face was right in front of his. She knew he was weak, so she didn't fight him. "Logan..." he breathed and then covered her mouth with his own.

She could feel the tears streaming down her face to mingle with his as his mouth tenderly explored hers. When he finally released her, he sighed deeply then closed his eyes.

"Cam?" she blinked. "Cam?!" she reached down and checked his pulse.

His pulse was weak and thready. "Cameron don't do this!" she pleaded.

He'd fallen completely unconscious and she couldn't rouse him. She could feel herself beginning to panic and when the guard came back with the ungly black bug, she snapped at them to send it back through the gate to her people. Enara returned to ask about Mitchell, but Logan was in no mood to coddle her.

"He's dying, you stupid twit! All because you decided you had to have him and keep him here!" she hissed at her.

"I did not intend for this to happen. Can you not cure him?"

"If we were back home, we could, but not here. You must let us go!"

"No."

"You want him to die?!"

"No, of course not. But I do not believe you are being truthful with me. I believe you are trying to trick me."

"LOOK AT HIM!" Logan shouted. "Does this look like a trick? He's barely breathing and he is going to die if you don't let me take him home!"

"Have your other healers... Your doctors come here."

"They can't bring the lab with them! All the equipment we need..." Logan was frantic now.

"If there is nothing further you can do for him, then you must leave."

"Leave? Leave him HERE?!" she yelled incredulously.

Enara nodded. "Yes."

"NO!"

"Then you must fight."

"FINE! Once he's better, I'll be only too happy to fight you, Enara, but right now, we have to focus on helping Cameron."

"You said there is nothing else you can do for him." At that moment, about two dozen armed warriors swept into the chamber and leveled their weapons at Logan.

"Now? You want to fight now?!" she shrieked incredulously.

"It is the council's decision. Our traditions must be upheld," she told her.

Logan looked down at Mitchell's face. "And if I win?"

"Then you will take my place as leader of my people."

"What if I don't want to be leader?" Logan frowned.

"Then I suggest you lose quickly."

"And this fight... What do I have to do to win? How far do we have to go?" she asked.

"It is a fight to the death, of course."

Logan rolled her eyes. "Of _course_ it is..."

There was no doubt in her mind that she could take Enara in a fair fight, but she didn't want to leave Mitchell's side. He was fading fast and she needed to get him out of there. The guard hadn't found the small earpiece in her ear, nor had they found the radio transmitter hidden in the lining of her jacket. She keyed the device, hoping against hope to hear SOMEONE on the other end, but all she heard was faint static. The Daedalus hadn't yet arrived. The longer she stood there and argued, the longer she would be prevented from helping Mitchell, so she had no choice but to agree. She wasn't yet at the point where she *wanted* to kill Enara, but she would, if it meant saving her friend. Nor did she have any intention of staying to become the leader of these people once Enara was dead.

"What is your answer?"

"Fine. I'll fight you," Logan replied.

Logan soon learned that these people weren't messing around when they said "fight to the death," as she looked up and down at the sword they'd handed her and around the large room across the hall from where Mitchell lay. She'd never actually fought with a sword before, but she figured it couldn't be too different than the stick fighting Teyla and John had taught her. Principle had to be similar anyway. She kept her radio keyed on as she stepped forward to face her foe in the circle the warriors had formed in the room, just in case the Daedalus arrived while she was fighting.

"You should know, I am the most skilled sword-fighter on my world," Enara warned her as she circled Logan.

"Thanks for the warning," Logan snarked. "Now, are we gonna dance, or are we gonna fight?"

Enara nodded. "We fight!"

With that, she lunged at Logan, who easily parried the first blow and struck back. Enara deftly avoided her strike and continued to circle her prey. She was testing Logan, trying to determine her weaknesses. Logan, a skilled combat fighter in her own right, recognized this and did her best to avoid giving anything away. The two struck and parried for several minutes, feeling out the other's skill, but Logan was rapidly becoming impatient. The longer they did this, the longer Mitchell would lay there without treatment. As much as she wanted to avoid it, Logan decided to fight more aggressively, to force Enara's hand. She couldn't afford to let this fight go on much longer.

First blood was drawn when Enara managed to parry a particularly vicious strike by Logan, though her blade managed to graze Enara's thigh as she blocked it from hitting her side. She gasped and instinctively grabbed her thigh for a moment. Logan saw her advantage and began to press harder. Somehow, Enara managed to parry her increasingly aggressive blows, but she could do nothing more than defend herself. She would tire, eventually, as long as Logan did not tire first. Logan continued to press her advantage, fueled by her increasing anger toward this woman, and these people who put Mitchell into the position he was in right now. It was because of them that he hadn't been able to come home and get the help he needed to combat the poison ravaging his body. As her anger built and began to boil, Logan managed to back Enara into a corner and down on one knee. Just as she was about to strike, she heard the static in her ear change and then someone called out her name.

"Colonel Devane, do you read us?"

'Hermiod!' Her mind screamed in silent recognition. "Do it _now_!" she barked, hoping Hermiod had been able to get a fix on Mitchell's location with the tracking device she planted on him.

"You are too far apart, Colonel, I can only bring one of you aboard at a time," Hermiod informed her.

"Mitchell!" she cried out, still raining blows on an exhausted Enara.

A heartbeat later, a collective gasp went around the room as a bright flash of light from across the hall illuminated the hallway. It was enough to momentarily distract Logan as she turned to look out the corner of her eye when they heard cries of Mitchell's disappearance.

"NO!" Enara screamed and finally struck back.

Logan sidestepped her blow, but not in time to avoid it completely. She deflected the brunt of it, but she received a small gash to her forehead and then to her shoulder. She gasped in pain, but an instant later, she was standing on the Daedalus, still holding her sword up defensively. Blood dripped down the side of her face as she stood there, processing the fact that she was now someplace else.

"Colonel Devane?"

"Hermiod..." She shook her head and looked around.

Mitchell was laying on the floor, being attended to by two medics. "Colonel Mitchell... How is he?" she immediately went to his side and took his hand in hers.

"It's not good, ma'am," said Parsons.

His pulse had been weak before, but now it was almost imperceptible. "We have to get him back to Atlantis...The gate..."

"He's not going to make it, ma'am..." Parsons began.

"Don't SAY that!" she screamed at him. "He HAS to make it!"

Hermiod, who had been scanning Mitchell's life signs, stepped in to intervene. "He is correct, Colonel Devane. I am afraid Colonel Mitchell is on the verge of..."

"NO!" she screamed. "There _has_ to be something we can do!"

Hermiod blinked. He had never seen her lose her temper or her composure in front of him before. "There is one thing we can try," he informed her.

"Please, Herm... Anything... Just... Just SAVE him," she pleaded.

"We can place him in the stasis chamber I have on board."

Logan started in surprise. "You have one... here?" she asked.

"Indeed," he replied.

"Yes... Please... Now?" she asked.

Between herself, Parsons and Klein, they were able to get Mitchell into the stasis chamber in a room just off Hermiod's quarters. Hermiod then set the controls and sealed Mitchell inside. Logan stared at the handsome face, now seemingly frozen inside. He appeared to be sleeping, but was, in fact, in a deep coma, on the verge of death. Logan traced the outline of his face over the glass barrier as the tears flowed down her cheeks. She didn't care right now if people saw her crying. There were many people on board who already knew the bond she and Sheppard shared with Mitchell. More than a few who called Mitchell a friend themselves, who were deeply concerned about him, too.

Parsons approached her warily. "Ma'am?"

"Yes?' She replied without turning around.

"I need to check your wounds," he murmured.

She looked over at him, apparently confused. She'd forgotten that she'd been nicked by Enara's blade. "I'm fine, Parsons."

"Yes ma'am, but Dr. Beckett will have my head on a platter if I don't at least clean those wounds."

Logan nodded meekly. "Very well." She took a seat nearby and let him clean and dress the superficial wounds on her forehead and shoulder.

"I'm supposed to inform you that the Daedalus is underway and we'll be arriving at Atlantis in a few hours. They are working on an anti-venom as we speak. General Caldwell figured you wouldn't want to leave the Colonel here, so he instructed us to bring you both back with us, rather than trying to send you back through the gate."

Logan nodded, but did not speak. With Mitchell in stasis, it would give them more time to find a cure, she knew this, but it did not comfort her much. They would have to remove him from stasis to administer the anti-venom, and he could still die before it had a chance to work. As much as she tried to push that thought away, she KNEW how weak he really was. She KNEW how close he was to death. She also knew he never would have said or done what he had back on Volla if he didn't FEEL certain he was about to die. He never would have kissed her if... She shook her head and forced herself to squeeze back a fresh wave of tears. No! She wouldn't allow herself to think about that! They WOULD find a cure and they WOULD save him!

Back in Atlantis, Sheppard and his team had just arrived home from their mission to find gloomy faces all the way around. He knew instantly that something was terribly wrong and his eyes began scanning the room for Logan. Caldwell pulled him aside and led him to his office for a private conversation.


	59. Chapter 59

Sheppard stood there, quietly fuming, while Caldwell explained everything that had happened. Despite the fact that he KNEW there was nothing anyone could say to dissuade her, he was still furious that Caldwell and Weir had allowed her to go. It wasn't that he wasn't deeply concerned about Mitchell, he was. But Logan was his life!

"She's fine, John. Other than being worried sick about Mitchell. I spoke to her right before you came back."

"She SAYS she's fine or she IS fine?" he asked angrily.

"Hermiod confirmed that she's okay, too."

"What about Mitchell?" he asked, unable to hide his concern.

"It's not good, John. Hermiod placed him in the Asgard stasis chamber he had on board the Daedalus but, from what I understand, Mitchell's condition is... very serious."

Sheppard frowned. "He's not... He's not gonna... die...?"

All Caldwell could do was shrug.

"No... He's gonna be fine," Sheppard insisted. "Logan'll take care of him and Beckett'll find a cure..."

"I hope so," Caldwell nodded.

"When will they be back?"

"A couple of hours," Caldwell replied.

"But as long as he's in stasis, he can't get any worse, right?" Sheppard asked, concern etched all over his face despite his assertion that Mitchell would be fine.

"Right."

Sheppard nodded and walked over to look out the window. "You're sure Logan's alright?" he asked.

"Yes."

"You know she'll blame herself if anything happens to Mitchell," Sheppard pointed out.

"I know."

"Not that anything's gonna happen to him, you know, I'm just... rambling..." he trailed off.

"I know."

"How close is Beckett to finding a cure?"

"I dunno... He's been working on the blood samples Logan sent back, and the bug itself she managed to send back right before..."

"Logan's never fought with swords before..." Sheppard said absently, cutting him off.

"She must have held her own pretty well, in spite of that. Carter tells me this woman, this princess on Volla, she's supposed to be some sword-fighting prodigy or something."

Sheppard nodded and allowed himself a slight, wry grin. "She still wouldn't be any match for a pissed off Logan Sheppard," he shrugged.

"You're right about that," he nodded. "... and apparently she wasn't."

"Logan is..." he trailed off with a smile, picturing her sword-fighting.

"I know."

Sheppard glanced over at him. "Yeah, of course you do..." He often allowed himself to forget that Caldwell had also been in love with Logan, once upon a time.

"They're both gonna be fine, John. We have to believe that."

"I do... I do..." he said unconvincingly.

"Go get cleaned up and see your kids. I'll let you know as soon as the Daedalus arrives."

Sheppard nodded and slowly walked out of the room.

TWO HOURS LATER

Sheppard made it to the infimary moments after Logan and Mitchell were beamed down from the Daedalus. He nearly gasped when he saw the bandage on her forehead from across the room. She was speaking intensely with Beckett when he arrived, so he waited for her to finish.

"Please... Carson... Tell me you have SOMETHING?!"

"Not yet, luv, but we're not giving up. You know we have more time now that he's in stasis, Logan. That gives us the time we need to get it right."

"Yes... Of course... He's just so... Carson, he's so weak..." she stammered, fear in her eyes.

"I promise you, I'll do everything I can to save him."

Logan nodded. "I know..."

"Now, how about you? Shall we check those wounds of yours?" he eyed her warily.

"No, Carson, I'm fine!" she snapped.

"I'm sure. But if I'm not mistaken, your husband just walked in and you know he won't stand for you not getting checked out - by ME - and he'll be a bloody pain in the arse until I do."

Logan looked over and flashed Sheppard a weak smile of acknowledgement. "Alright," she mumbled.

Beckett led her over to another room, motioning for Sheppard to follow them. When he came in, he gave her a hug, but jumped back in surprise as she winced when he squeezed her.

"What...?" he looked down at her in concern.

"I'm sorry... It's nothing..." she said, unconvincingly.

Beckett shook his head and had her remove her jacket. Both he and Sheppard gasped when they saw blood slowly seeping through the dressing on her shoulder.

"Logan! what the hell?!" Sheppard demanded.

"It's just superficial," she assured him.

"Yes, luv, but it's still a nasty slice. Was this a sword then?" Beckett asked.

"Just the tip, she never really got close enough to..." she trailed off with a shrug.

"Dammit Logan!" Sheppard barked at her when Beckett stepped aside to get some antiseptic.

"I'm fine, John."

"Like hell, Sparks. What were you thinking?" he demanded.

"I was THINKING that I had to save a friend... OUR friend!" she retorted angrily.

She knew he was just concerned about her, and that his anger was borne out of worry, for both her and for Mitchell.

"She'll be alright, John," Beckett assured him after probing her wound. "It doesn't require stitches, but it's going to smart for a few days."

"She shouldn't have been hurt to begin with!" Sheppard barked.

"No, she shouldn't have been, but it was her own damned fault for getting distracted in the middle of a fight!" Logan snarled.

"A fight she never should have been in!" Sheppard countered.

"And I should have just left him there to DIE?!" Logan snapped and then began to cry.

Sheppard immediately took her in his arms and held her close. His anger at what had happened dimmed and all he cared about was making sure Logan and Mitchell were okay. "No... Of course not. I'm sorry Sparks," he whispered.

Beckett excused himself and left Sheppard there to comfort her. He immediately went to the lab to check on the progress of the scientists trying to come up with an anti-venom for Mitchell.

"I had to, Johnny... I had to go," Logan sniffled.

"I know baby, I know..."

"He... he's... so weak..." she cried. "I'm scared. Really scared."

"Did he...know...? Before he slipped into the coma, did he know how bad it was?" he asked.

She nodded miserably, fresh tears streaming freely down her face. "Yes," she wailed. "I tried to tell him... to make him fight... He wanted us to know how much he... you and the kids..." she was rapidly losing the ability to speak coherently.

Now that she was here, safely wrapped in Sheppard's arms, she could finally let go of the last of her control and let the grief wash over her. Sheppard would take care of her. He would see her through it until she could stand on her own again. Logan closed her eyes and cried her heart out.

TWO DAYS LATER

Logan sat with both Nic and Chels on her lap as they kept vigil over Mitchell's still form. They had decorated his room with pictures drawn by the children, though Nic's were more scribbles than anything really recognizable, but they were cheery and colorful. The children had known, despite assurances from Logan and Sheppard, that something was terribly wrong. Especially when they'd asked for their Uncle Cameron. Logan had barely been able to hold her composure. Sheppard had been the one to explain to them that Mitchell was sick and that Dr. Beckett was taking very good care of him.

They had pleaded with Sheppard to be allowed to see him, but Sheppard, believing it might frighten them to see Mitchell that way, had gently refused. Chelsea begged to see him, but Sheppard remained steadfast. Finally, after much anguish and many tears, he sat down with Logan to discuss it and they agreed that it was probably doing them more harm than good NOT to see Mitchell.

He explained to them beforehand, that Mitchell would be sleeping in a very special bed, to help him get better, and that they wouldn't be able to touch him at all, but they could talk to him and let him know how much they loved and needed him. He warned them not to be frightened because he didn't wake up, as it was necessary for him to sleep so he could get well. Both children seemed to take things in stride and were simply relieved to be able to see his familiar face through the glass front of his special bed.

Chelsea chattered incessantly to him, telling him in her own sing-song way about everything she'd been doing since she last saw him. Logan smiled as she described, in detail, each picture she had drawn for him and then tried to explain what it was that Nic had drawn for him. Logan felt a little better, too, as she watched and listened to her children chatter away. She wanted to believe that, on some level, Mitchell could hear them and that it would help him fight for his life.

Sheppard popped in and out of the infirmary as he went on about his routine. He tried not to show Logan or the children how worried he was about Mitchell, though he didn't really hold out much hope that he could hide his feelings from Logan. He'd never been able to do that. Ever. Still, he kept up a brave face. Fraser had come in to help Beckett and the other doctors and scientists try to come up with a cure, and they'd even sent samples back to Earth to be examined by an entomologist just to cover all their bases.

There was nothing left for the rest of them to do but watch, wait and hope. Carter, Teal'c and Daniel were nearly inconsolable in their grief and guilt over what had happened. Caldwell and O'Neill had assured them over and over again that there was nothing they could have done to prevent what happened, or to protect themselves against the greater numbers they faced. Had Mitchell not been bitten by that bug, they very well may have been able to find a way out, eventually, or to at least effect a rescue later on, but none of them seemed to be buying it.

Nearly a week passed and still they seemed no closer to finding a cure. Logan urged them not to give up, since Mitchell could remain in stasis for a long time to come without doing any further damage. she refused to allow anyone to even consider the possibility that they might not be able to save him. For their part, Beckett and Fraser worked tirelessly, day in and day out.

Simmons had come when he heard about Mitchell, to try and console Sheppard and Logan, as well as offer moral support to Janet Frasier, whom he had hit it off with extremely well the first time he visited. They had grown very close in that time, and Simmons was an enormous comfort to her as she struggled to help Beckett find a cure for Mitchell. As happy as Logan was that Mike and Janet had found each other, she was too worried about Mitchell to give it much thought.

Another week passed and still they had no answers. The SGC had sent in a temporary replacement for Mitchell, something that didn't sit well with either Sheppard or Logan. Caldwell wasn't happy about it either, but he agreed that it was necessary. SG-1 had to get back out there and he knew it. They grumbled, but in the end, they managed to pull it together and go back to work.

Unbeknownst to all of them, however, Mitchell was very much alive, if trapped, inside his own body. His dreams were vivid and elaborate. Much like Logan had when she'd been in her coma, his life replayed over and over in his mind as he slumbered. He relived everything, from childhood on. His first X-302 flight. His promotion to Lt. Colonel. The battle over Antarctica. The fulfillment of his dream: his assignment to the SGC. The first time he laid eyes on Logan Devane. The birth of a child he loved as if she were his own. The taste of Logan's lips. The deep, emerald eyes, twinkling with joy and mischief. The pain mixed with happiness as he watched his best friend renew his wedding vows to the woman they both loved.

Sheppard watched his wife toss and turn fitfully in her sleep. She hadn't been sleeping well for the past several weeks; ever since Mitchell had gone down. He hadn't been sleeping well either, but he was more concerned about Logan. Suddenly she bolted upright in bed and cried out.

"No!"

Sheppard immediately took her in his arms and tried to calm her. "Shhh, shhhh...It's okay Sparks..." he cooed softly.

She was breathing heavily, wide-eyed and perspiring. After a few moments, she allowed herself to relax a bit into Sheppards' embrace.

"What can I do?" he asked.

"Just...hold me," she sniffled.

They lay there for a few moments, spooned together. Logan traced her fingertips across the arm he had draped over her stomach and tried to focus only on the sound of his breathing. She mentally kicked herself, again, for losing it. She was not the only one who was suffering over Mitchell's fate. Mitchell was Sheppard's best friend and he was hurting, deeply, too. It was grotesquely unfair for her to be the one who was constantly receiving comfort from him. HE needed comfort, too.

"I'm sorry John," she murmured into the darkness.

"For what?" he asked perplexed.

"For being such a wimp..."

"Logan...honey," he began inccredulously. "You are the farthest thing from a wimp there could be."

She rolled over to face him, her hand tracing the outline of his jaw. "You give me comfort every minute of every day. And all I do is take, take, take."

"That's not true," he countered.

"He's your best friend, John... when do _you_ get to be comforted?"

"Sparky... YOU are my comfort. YOU are my strength. YOU are my hope. Am I worried? Sure! I'm pissed, even... Mostly because it never should have happened, but also because I feel so... helpless. There is nothing I can do for him. To help him. But I can take care of the people he loves. You, the kids. That gives me... It makes me feel like I'm doing... SOMETHING."

"And that makes you feel better."

"You know it does."

Logan nodded. "I need to take care of you, too."

"You do."

"I just...I..." she trailed off as she began to cry softly.

"What honey?"

"God, I'm so selfish!" she wailed.

"Not a chance!"

"I just think about... John, you are the strongest man I know..."

"Stronger than Teal'c or Ronan?" he teased.

"As far as I'm concerned... And I mean on the inside, too, flyboy. And no one can hold a candle to you, in my eyes, but... Cam, he comes a little close, in a way. And if he can be taken down... so easily... By some stupid little bug..."

"I know, it's not right."

"He just... John... If anything ever happened to YOU..."

He pulled her face against his chest and gently stroked her hair. "So...THAT'S what's been at the heart of all this," he whispered.

"Mmmmmm..."

"You think I don't have the same fears about losing you? Again, I mean?"

"I know you do."

"And the stakes are even higher, now that we have the kids."

Logan nodded.

"I can't imagine my life without you, Sparky... I don't WANT to even try."

"Me either," she sniffled.

"I love you so much," he murmured.

"I love you, too, John."

TWO WEEKS LATER

A bleary eyed Beckett stumbled into Caldwells' office, looking wild and disheveled. "We've got it!" he announced.

Caldwell sat there for a moment before it registered. "An antidote?" he asked.

"Yes, yes, yes!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, yes, yes!"

Logan and Sheppard happened to be passing by at the time and they exchanged curious glances. "What's going on?" Sheppard asked.

Beckett went straight up to Logan and kissed her on the forehead. "We've got it, luv!" he said victoriously.

"You DO?!" they asked in unison.

"We need Hermiod down here," Beckett said as he ran out of the office.

"I'll call," Caldwell held up a hand. "Go!"

Logan and Sheppard chased off after Beckett, who reached the infirmary a full sixty seconds before them. Frasier, equally bleary-eyed and excited, was already there, standing over the stasis chamber. While they explained to Logan and Sheppard what steps they would take to try and revive Mitchell, Hermiod was beamed down into the infirmary.

"Greetings all," he said simply.

"Hermiod... Hi," Logan stammered.

"If this doesn't work... He can... You can put him back into stasis, right?" Sheppard asked, concern etched over the handsome features.

"Indeed. The stasis will prevent his condition from deteriorating any further, however, it will also prevent the antidote from working through his system as well," he warned.

"He was so weak... when we put him in there," Logan said absently.

"Aye, but he's a strong lad, with a pretty fair will to live, I don't think he'll give up without a fight, luv."

Logan looked over at Sheppard. She'd told him that Mitchell knew he was close to death, and that he'd almost been resigned to it. All they could do now was hope that he gave himself a chance to respond to the antidote they'd come up with.

"Will he hear us when you bring him out of stasis?" Sheppard asked.

"That depends on whose theory you subscribe to about coma patients. I believe he'll be able to hear you, even if he can't physically respond." Beckett explained.

"So do I," Frasier agreed.

"With this device," Hermiod began, holding up a small display. "I can monitor his brain function and determine whether or not he responds to your voices."

"Okay... Good," Sheppard shrugged. "Are we ready?"

He and Logan stepped back and let the three of them do their work. Just before Hermiod released Mitchell from stasis, Beckett injected a vial of the antidote into his body. They all watched, over Hermiod's shoulders, the device he held and watched as the readings began to change and fluctuate.

"Talk to him," Frasier told them.

Logan and Sheppard took up a position on either side of him, each taking a hand in theirs. "Hey buddy, it's John."

"I'm here, too Space Cowboy. We really need you to wake up."

As they continued to talk to him, Mitchell's mind began to respond. Images flashed before him, faster than when he'd been in stasis. Everything was murky around him, but he thought he could feel someone holding his hands. He struggled to pull himself out of the darkness and to make sense of the voices around him.

"I believe he hears them," Hermiod announced.

"Keep talking," Beckett encouraged.

He could feel the pain again. He was still alive. He thought it had been over there for a while. Perhaps it still was, he thought, as another wave washed over him. Everything was still dark and murky, the voices were muted and strange to him, but also familiar. He tried to force himself to push down the pain so he could focus on the voices.

For several hours they sat by Mitchell's bed and talked to him, begging and pleading for him to open his eyes. The good news was that he didn't seem to be deteriorating any further, so that was giving the antidote time to work through his system. The longer it had, in order to do its work, the better Mitchells's chances for recovery. They were still worried, however, that he hadn't yet shown any sign of waking up. His brain function seemed to be normal, though Hermiod informed them that he appeared to be dreaming.

"Like I was when I was in a coma?" Logan asked.

"Very likely," Beckett replied.

He and Frasier encouraged them to keep talking to him while they went on about their business in between monitoring his condition. Sheppard had Rylin bring the children for a short visit, and they were delighted to see Mitchell without the glass barrier between him and them. They each gave him a kiss and chattered a bit before Rylin took them back to the nursery.

"Wake up Unca Cammen," Chelsea admonished before she left.

"Yeah... Wake up Uncle Cameron," Sheppard echoed.

They began to talk to him about the children and how much they missed and needed him, but they weren't really looking at the handsome face anymore. The first thing he saw when his eyes popped open was some multicolored blob hanging on the table beside the bed. His eyesight was blurred and unfocused, so he wasn't really sure what it was he was seeing. He blinked several times to try and clear his vision, but even when the colors became a little clearer, the object in the picture still eluded him.

"What is that?" he asked casually, his voice raspy and dry.

"A picture from Nic..." Sheppard replied absently before realizing it was Mitchell's voice, and not Beckett's.

"Cam?!" Logan asked.

"Hi gorgeous," he murmured.

"Sonofa... When did you wake up?!" Sheppard asked, grinning madly.

"I dunno... I saw that...thing... and I was trying to figure out what it was, but now I know," he smiled happily.

"Oh really?" Sheppard asked.

"Yeah, it's obvious."

"Soooooo? What is it?" Logan tested him, knowing full well what it was.

"It's me, flying a jumper," he replied.

Logan and Sheppard exchanged glances. "You heard us talking about it!" he accused.

"Nope! Can't you tell? That (pointing at one blob) is me, no question. And the bigger thing here (pointing again) is the jumper."

"Very good," Logan smiled, then bent down to kiss him on the cheek. "Welcome back, Space Cowboy."

"Thanks... How long was I out?"

"You don't really want to know..." Sheppard was interrupted by the arrival of Frasier and Beckett, who shooed them out of the room so Mitchell could be examined.

Out in the hall, they called Caldwell and Weir to have them spread the good news: Mitchell was finally awake, and from the look of things, he was doing well.


	60. Chapter 60

Mitchell lay in bed staring up at the ceiling. He was bored out of his mind, but he wasn't nearly strong enough to get out of bed and walk around. He still had some of the toxin in his body, but the antidote seemed to be doing its work. He would drift off to sleep at the drop of a hat though, something he found very unnerving, but at least he always woke up. And THAT was something he thought would never happen again. When he'd lost consciousness back on Volla, he was absolutely sure he would never open his eyes again. He didn't remember much of what had happened, at least he wasn't sure what was a dream and what was reality - they seemed to be intermingled.

What he did remember, however, were the dreams he had while in a coma, or rather the memories he had been reliving. He now understood what Logan had been going through when she'd been the one in a coma, although the consequences for him hadn't been as severe as they had been for her. He was extremely grateful, however, that he hadn't suffered any memory loss. While some of his memories were less than blissful, they were still HIS and he didn't want to lose them.

"Unca Cammen!" came Chelsea's sudden cry of delight.

"Hey squirt!" he grinned broadly as Sheppard lifted her up onto the bed.

She hugged him fiercely then settled into the curve of his arm and held out her most recent piece of artwork.

"Wow! That is beautiful, Sweet-pea. I love all the pictures you drew for me."

Chelsea grinned up at him. "Make feel better?"

He hugged her tightly to his side. "MUCH better, thank you."

"Still sick?" she asked.

"Yes, but the doctor tells me I'm getting better."

"Good."

"Where's Nic?" Mitchell asked.

"Bath... Nic make messes," she replied simply.

Mitchell looked over at Sheppard, who winced slightly. "A _big_ mess," he confirmed.

"Do I want to know?" Mitchell grimaced.

"He... uh... smuggled some chocolate pudding out of the mess and uh... painted his room..." Sheppard informed him.

Mitchell tried his level best not to laugh.

" _Big_ mess," Chelsea nodded.

He could see that Sheppard was also trying very hard not to laugh and called him on it.

"Yeah well... Let's just say that Logan didn't see the humor in the situation. I figured it was best to get the cadet here out of the line of fire for a while."

"Mamma mad!" Chelsea shook her head.

"I'll bet," Mitchell said, not looking at Sheppard for fear that they'd both burst out laughing.

"She'll uh... Probably be bringing Nic here later to visit you... If she doesn't kill him first. I'm supposed to go clean it up while she's out."

"You laughed in front of her, didn't you?" Mitchell asked, still fighting back the urge to laugh.

"Daddy laugh _hard_!" Chelsea tattled.

"I couldn't help it!" he squawked defensively. "I mean... You really should have seen it."

"I'd have been in trouble, too, then!" he chuckled.

"Well, listen... I'm glad you're feeling better. I promised the cadet she could visit you twice today. Can we bring you anything back later?" Sheppard asked.

"Pizza?" he pleaded.

Sheppard laughed. "I'll see what I can do." (Holding his arms out for Chelsea) Say bye-bye to Uncle Cameron, Sweet-pea."

"Bye Unca Cammen!" she planted a wet kiss on Mitchell's cheek. "Wuv you!"

"I love you, too, squirt. Come back and see me again soon?"

"You bet!" she replied, launching herself into Sheppard's arms.

"See you later man," Sheppard shook his hand.

"Thanks for bringing her," Mitchell smiled.

"Any time. Later!"

"Later," Chelsea echoed.

ONE WEEK LATER

Logan stepped through the Genoan stargate and smiled in greeting. Her arms were laden with goodies and "presents" for Mitchell from the children. He'd been home for two days now and doing remarkably well, considering what his body had been through. She and Sheppard had wanted him to remain in Atlantis, where they could keep a close eye on him, but he'd insisted on going back to his own place. And since Frasier was here as well, they knew they had no reason to argue with him.

Sheppard was off on a mission and Lyta and Rylin were watching the children, so she took this opportunity to come and check up on Mitchell's progress. If he continued to improve at the rate he had been the past few weeks, he would be cleared for full duty in another week or so. She stopped to chat with several people she knew along the way to Mitchell's quarters. It did feel good to get away for a while, even if it WAS just to another base.

Just as she went to knock on his door, the door slid open. She stood there for a moment, blinking, then stepped one foot inside. "Cameron?" she called out.

She heard the sound of the shower coming from the other room, so she was going to leave his gifts on the bed and come back later. As she did so, a half-dressed woman emerged from the bathroom, shrugging herself into her shirt. Logan stood there, staring at her questioningly, and didn't speak. She didn't recognize the woman, but she did recognize the emblem on her uniform shirt. Medical team. she was a nurse.

"Excuse me, may I help you?" the woman said indignantly.

Logan looked around to make sure she did have the right quarters before responding. Mitchell's things were there, so she WAS in the right place, although apparently at the wrong time. "Excuse ME, I was looking for Colonel Mitchell."

The woman noted the medic emblem on Logan's uniform and huffed a bit haughtily. "Colonel Mitchell is indisposed at the moment, but I can assure you, he does not need a medic, he's being well taken care of!"

"Is that a fact?" Logan arched an eyebrow at her.

"Shall I give him a message for you?" she asked, pointing to the door.

"Why not? Just tell him Colonel Devane stopped by," she said, a hard edge to her voice.

The woman gasped, but softened only a little. "Oh, I beg your pardon Colonel... I didn't know you were... I thought Dr. Frasier sent you."

"Civilian?"

The woman nodded.

"Been working for the military long?"

"Five years."

"And yet you still don't recognize the rank insignia on a person's uniform after all that time?" Logan continued to glare at her.

"I didn't see it... I just saw the medic insignia..."

"You mean the one right below my rank insignia?"

"I...Yes, Colonel. I beg your pardon."

"I wonder... Does Dr. Frasier KNOW the kind of specialized care you offer her patients?" Logan asked.

"I... no... It's just..."

At that moment, Mitchell came striding into the room wearing nothing but a towel and a smile, which quickly faded the instant he saw Logan. "Lo... Colonel!" he gasped.

"Are we done here?" the woman asked impudently.

"Oh yeah, so done..." Logan waved her away, never taking her eyes off Mitchell.

"I'll see you later," she said to Mitchell and hurried out the door.

"Logan..." he began.

"I brought you some presents from the kids and some goodies... Though apparently, you've already had your fill of goodies for the day," she said, remembering the sizable "goodies" overflowing that push-up bra the woman had on.

"Logan..."

"I came to see how you were feeling... Much better, I see. I have to get back to Atlantis now," she said.

"No! Logan, come on!" he called out to her.

"It's none of my business, Colonel," she said.

"Don't be like that, please..." he groaned.

"I should warn you, though, as a friend and all? I don't think she's the type to be very discreet, so if you have big plans for..."

"Logan!"

"What?!" she snapped angrily.

"It's nothing serious, really."

She shook her head. "Again, none of my business, except I will say this, please don't bring her anywhere near my children?"

"I would never... Wait a minute!" he moved to stand in her way when she headed for the door. "What is WRONG with you?"

Logan looked up and into his eyes. She had no answer for that. She couldn't say exactly WHY she was so angry, and that made her even angrier!

"Are you telling me that YOU never got lonely, before you and John..."

"I never said..."

"Do you have any idea how LONG it's been since I..."

"NO! And I apologize for being so snippy. It's none of _my_ business, I know that, so now I'm just going to take me and my nose out of _your_ business."

"Logan..."

"Except for one more inappropriate comment... She's (pointing at the door) not good enough for you, Cam, not by a long shot, and you deserve better!"

"Not good enough... Geez Lo, it was just the one time, she knows that. It's not like I'm gonna marry the woman or anything. I was just... just feeling..."

"Horny?" Logan offered.

"To be honest YEAH! Is that a crime?" he snapped defensively.

"No."

"Maybe she wasn't the best person to... conjugate with... but she's the only one who offered..." he shrugged.

At this Logan laughed out loud. "Yeah, RIGHT!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

" _Look_ at you, Cameron Mitchell!" she stepped back and let her eyes roam over his body. "Women go nuts for men like you. They're probably three deep in line just for a shot at hopping into the sack with you!" she laughed.

All he could think was "Not you," but he kept that to himself.

"Look, you're a big boy and you're free to do whatever you want, with whomever you want. It's really none of my business and I'm sorry I made an issue of it. From now on, I'll keep my opinions about your... conquests... to myself."

"I hate that you're mad at me."

"I'm not mad at you... I just... The woman rubbed me the wrong way, and for what it's worth, I don't think she's as casual about you as you are about her, so be careful."

"I will," he promised. "Now please... Stay and visit with me?"

LATER

Sheppard tried, unsuccessfully, to stifle a grin as Logan relayed everything that had happened in Mitchell's quarters on Genoa. He knew exactly what had motivated her to bare her teeth at the unfortunate nurse. He believed that she was unsuitable for Mitchell, as Logan had superb instincts about that sort of thing, but he also knew that his little encounter with her meant very little, if anything, to Mitchell. He'd been where Mitchell was, back in the days before he and Logan got together. Military life could be very lonely. Excruciatingly so for those stationed so far from home.

Military regs being what they were, it wasn't easy to find women who weren't considered off-limits. As long as she was civilian, Mitchell was perfectly within his rights to burn off a little steam between the sheets where he could find it. Add to that the fact that he had recently very nearly died, Sheppard would be surprised, nay SHOCKED, if Mitchell didn't feel the need to sow a few wild oats.

Logan was highly protective of the people she loved, especially those she considered "family." If this nurse were the viper Logan perceived her to be, then it was no wonder her protective instincts kicked in. He, Sheppard, wasn't really laughing at her, but the image of her dressing down said tart who likely had some dastardly plans for poor Mitchell. He loved watching Logan in lioness mode, though Mitchell was no child, she obviously felt that he needed to be protected; lest his baser instincts wind him up in the kind of trouble he really didn't need.

"Did you draw blood?" he teased.

"No... Not yet..." she said, eyeing him with a warning glare.

"Easy, easy, easy, Sparks! I believe you. She was probably the worst kind of tart imaginable - I'm with you!"

"He deserves better," she said defensively.

"I agree."

"Then you don't think I'm a total b*tch?"

"Never!" he replied honestly.

He drew her into his arms and held her close, breathing in the unique scent of her hair. "I love that you're so protective of the people we love."

"Even when I behave like a raving lunatic?" she muttered.

"Especially then," he leered down at her.

Without another word, she reached up and pulled his face down to hers, kissing him passionately. When she finally released him, his eyes were glazed with desire. "When..." he coughed. "When is Rylin coming back with the kids?" he asked.

"In an hour..." she smiled.

He swept her off her feet and headed for their bedroom. "Oh... good!"

THE FOLLOWING NIGHT

Simmons was whistling, softly, to himself as he made his way down the hall toward his guest quarters. His "date" with Janet Frasier had been the most fun he'd had in quite a while. She was an amazing woman, beautiful too. She was great with his kids, who adored her, and he was becoming quite fond of her now young adult daughter, Cassandra. Cassandra was attending college back on Earth, and he made a point of keeping a watchful eye over her.

He'd never expected to develop the kind of feelings he held for Janet, not after the loss of his wife years before, but he found himself falling for her more each day. She was very open and unassuming, and she had a GREAT sense of humor. She had a tendency to draw him out of himself and the shell he'd built around himself. He never had been one who cared for long distance relationships, but he found that he didn't care so much anymore, as long as it meant he could be with Janet. He was lost in thought as he rounded the corner and ran smack into Sheppard.

"Whoa, hey there Bro!" Sheppard chuckled.

"Sorry John," Simmons grinned.

"Have a good time?" Sheppard asked knowingly.

"The best!"

"That's great, Mike. I had a feeling about you two," Sheppard grinned.

"She's...amazing."

"That she is."

"What are you doing up and about?" Simmons asked curiously, checking his watch.

"Nic...He's got a bit of a cold, so I'm headed to the infirmary to get him some medicine."

"Poor little guy," Simmons said sympathetically.

"Yeah, he's pretty miserable."

"Logan worried?"

"Of course... She always thinks it's her fault when one of the kids gets sick or something... One of those working mother kind of things, I guess."

"She's a phenomenal mother," Simmons pointed out.

"Yep, and a phenomenal wife," he winked.

"You're one lucky S.O.B. John."

"Tell me something I _don't_ know! You want to walk with me, or are you turning in for the night?"

"I'll come with you, I'm not really tired yet."

TWO WEEKS LATER

"A SKATEBOARD?!" Logan asked. "John, she's only two!"

"Yeah, but she's got great balance," he replied.

"No two year old has THAT good of balance, or coordination."

"You should see her..." he trailed off, knowing that he'd inadvertantly let the cat out of the bag.

"You just gave it to her, honeybuns... Are you telling me she can ride it already?"

"Uh... Well... Funny thing..."

"You've been teaching her on yours?"

Bingo. Busted. He looked down at her sheepishly, then smiled.

"She's really good, babe, and she LOVES it!"

"Of course she loves it! She's loves EVERYTHING you love!" Logan barked.

"You're not really mad, are you?" he asked hopefully.

"That depends... Where have the two of you been riding?"

"In the gym, only in the gym, I swear!" he crossed his heart.

"As long as you haven't tried taking her out on the piers..." she eyed him suspiciously.

"I swear, not once!"

A frantic knock at the door interrupted them. Sheppard was surprised to find Tarik there.

"I need your help!" he said to Logan.

"What is it?"

"It's Elizabeth... Dr. Beckett is off-world and Dr. Frasier is busy with Teyla."

"Wait, is she in labor?" Logan asked.

"Yes!" he replied, taking her by the hand.

"And you want ME to deliver the baby?"

"Please, please! You must..." he pleaded.

Logan flashed back to the last time she'd been forced to deliver a child and shuddered at the memory. It was true, she'd delivered two healthy infants of her own, but she hadn't really had a choice there. There was a part of her that still blamed herself for the death of Shannon Caldwell, and probably always would. She did not want to be responsible for anything happening to Weir as well. Sheppard was all too aware of Logan's feelings on the matter, but he knew her instincts would kick in and she wouldn't refuse to help.

"Logan?" he nudged her gently.

"I...Yes, of course I'll come..." she murmured.

Sheppard stayed with the children, until he could summon Rylin to watch them, while Logan went with Tarik to the infirmary. Weir was in full-blown labor when they arrived, frightened and in pain. As Tarik had told her, Teyla had suddenly gone into labor, on Genoa, so Dr. Frasier had her hands full there. Beckett was off-world, and they hadn't been able to reach him yet. There were several nurses on duty, but they were part of a new rotation, and none of them had ever delivered a baby before.

Logan's instincts did kick in and she immediately took charge of the infirmary. She began barking orders to the nurses and asked for an incubator to be wheeled in. She instructed Tarik to take his place by Weir's side and to do whatever he could to comfort her. They had already gone through the Lamaze training, so he soon began helping her breathe through the contractions. She was almost fully dilated and already beginning to feel the uncontrollable need to push. Logan calmed her down and started talking her through the stages of labor.

She shut out the voices from the past and focused solely on what needed to be done. Within an hour, she lay a healthy, wet, squalling, squirming baby girl on Weir's chest. Everything had gone beautifully and, thankfully, Weir hadn't experienced any complications. Almost immediately after she had Tarik cut the cord, Beckett burst into the room in full scrubs. He took in the situation at a glance and waited for Logan to make the next move.

"Doc... Nice of you to join us!" she teased happily.

"Well, it looks like you've got everything under control here," he congratulated her.

"It's all yours now, Doc. You take it from here," she said, enormously relieved.

"Alright then, luv. Good work."

Logan left the room on now shaking legs, eternally grateful that nothing had gone wrong. Sheppard was right outside to greet her, taking her in his arms and telling her how proud he was of her.

The following day they visited Teyla, Teal'c, Hope and their newest addition, Bra'tac, named after Teal'cs mentor, Master Bra'tac. He was indeed a hale and hearty lad, and the whole family beamed with pride. Hope was thrilled to have a baby brother to dote on. Teal'c informed them that both Ry'ac and Master Bra'tac would be arriving within a few days so they could meet the new addition as well. Frasier arrived while they were visiting, to check on her patients, and congratulated Logan on delivering Weir's bouncing baby girl, whom they later learned would be named Nerina, after Tarik's mother.

They didn't stay long, knowing how tired Teyla must be, and returned to Atlantis within the hour. Mitchell was staying with the kids, so Logan and Sheppard decided to take one of the jumpers out and spend the evening on their private beach on the mainland. Logan was unusually quiet as they flew, and Sheppard decided it was best to leave her to her private thoughts, though he was sure he already knew what she was thinking about. After they landed, and Sheppard laid out a blanket for them on the beach, he took her in his arms and held her quietly while they looked up at the stars. After a few moments, he finally broke the silence between them.

"Do you wanna tell me, or shall I guess?"

"I was just thinking..." she said absently.

"Uh-huh..."

"With everything that's happened recently...I..."

"Yes?" he prodded.

"Maybe we shouldn't wait to have another child."

"I kinda thought that was what was on your mind."

"You know me too well," she smiled.

"Got baby-fever watching Teyla and Elizabeth?"

"Not them, so much... I just... You know how upset I was when Cameron was..."

"Yes."

"It just reminded me that life is too short, and far too precious to...you know...try and control..."

"You sure that's what you want?" he asked.

"If you do," she replied hesitantly.

"You know I do... I'm all for it, in fact, I believe it was me who suggested it, but if you're not ready, hon, there's no need to rush..."

She reached over and placed a finger on his lips. "I'm ready."

"Yeah?"

"I don't... There's really no reason to wait... I'm healthy. Nic will be over two years old by the time the next one comes along..."

"Sweetheart, you don't have to convince me, I'm ready whenever you are."

She fell silent and smiled up at him. "I'm ready."

Sheppard rolled on top of her and played with the buttons on her blouse. "You're sure?"

"Very," she purred.

"Shall we have a practice run, then?" he grinned wickedly.

"By all means," she murmured and pulled his face down to hers.


	61. Chapter 61

"You're kidding!" Caldwell said incredulously.

"No sir," Sheppard replied.

Caldwell could almost hear him grinning over the radio as he spoke. "How deep does it go?"

"Deep, sir, Mckay said it runs deeper than anything we've come across before."

"Excellent. So even sharing it 50/50 with the Tollans, we'll be able to mine that deposit for years, right?"

"Right!"

"I'll notify General Hammond right away," Caldwell said.

"WAIT!" McKay piped up excitedly.

"What is it, Doctor?" Caldwell asked.

"General... You're not gonna believe this!"

"I might if you tell me," he prodded.

"There's more to this planet than just Trinium, General..."

"Oh?"

"We just found an enormous deposit of Naquada!"

"Say again?" Caldwell asked.

"Naquada! The vein is huge! Probably as large as the Trinium!" McKay shouted excitedly.

"Sounds like we've hit the jackpot, gentlemen."

"Yes sir," Sheppard said.

"Okay if I notify General Hammond now?" Caldwell snarked.

"Oh.. .sure... Go ahead," McKay stammered.

"Let Tarik know that Hammond will be contacting him soon, so they can get together and hammer out an arrangement for sharing the find."

"Will do, sir. Sheppard out."

Caldwell turned and looked at Logan, who was smiling over at him. She was no scientist, but she knew how important the find was. They hadn't expected to find either element here, after exploring Pegasus for so long, but it made sense that the Naquada, at least, would be here. The Ancients used Naquada for much of their technology, so it stood to reason that they would have to have a supply here.

"Good news," she smiled up at him.

"Yeah," he shook his head. "They're gonna be doing handstands at the Pentagon. I'd say we just justified our budget requests for the next ten years or so!" he grinned.

"Let's hope so!" she replied. "You wanna tell Elizabeth, or shall I?"

"I'll talk to her after I speak to General Hammond."

"Very well, I'm going to go check with Bates on the shift change." Logan said, excusing herself.

Zelenka caught up with her as she made her way downstairs to Bates' office. "Did they say what I thought they said?" he asked excitedly.

"Yup!"

"That's wonderful!" he cried out and took off down the hall mumbling happily in Czek.

HOURS LATER

Simmons popped his head into Logan's office and greeted her brightly.

"Howdy Colonel!" he chirped.

"Mike! Hey, I didn't know you were coming," she stood up and came around her desk to give him a hug.

"Last minute kind of thing. I won't be staying long this trip."

"Have you already seen Janet?" she teased.

"No, not yet."

"But you PLAN to..." she trailed off meaningfully.

"Yes, Colonel Matchmaker!"

HAH! You don't need me to matchmake for you two. You found each other without any help from me!"

"True, true. So, how's everyone doing?"

"We're great!" she replied brightly.

"John tells me you guys are trying to have another baby?"

"John speaks the truth. We were going to wait a while, but... What's the point?"

"I think it's great. I'm really happy for you guys."

"Hasn't happened yet, but..." she shrugged, beaming happily.

"You're having fun trying?" he finished for her.

"How are the boys?"

"They're doing well. They miss you guys, but they're enjoying school, growing like weeds, and...(pulling out an envelope) I have some new pictures for you."

Logan smiled as she took in the two handsome faces. "They look just like John did as a kid...You too, I imagine... Undeniably Sheppard."

"Must be kinda surreal for you... Having known him back then and then seeing the boys now."

She nodded. " All of them really. Nic and Chels are ALL John," she laughed. "Not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm kinda fond of his looks myself!"

"Is he off-world today?"

"Yeah, 'fraid so... We found another apparently abandoned planet that might hold some more deposits of Naquada or Trinium."

"P98-442 not enough?" he teased.

"You know the Pentagon, Mike, too much is never enough! He's not due back for a while; he'll be sorry he missed you."

"Guess I'll just have to catch him next time," he shrugged.

"Mm-hmm... And you better get your ass over to Genoa to see Janet while you can," she scolded.

"On my way," he said, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek.

An hour later, a bleary-eyed Logan was hurriedly finishing up the reports she had to turn in by the end of the day. She hated paperwork with a passion, but she found that if she just hunkered down, sucked it up, she could usually get all of it done in one sitting. As she was putting the finishing touches on her report and signing her name, she caught a flash out of the corner of her eye.

"Hey sweetie, I didn't know you were back," she smiled.

When he didn't say anything, Logan stopped and looked up at him. "John?"

He simply stared at her, an odd, almost confused, but loving expression on his face. She looked down for a split second to close the file she was working on and when she looked up again, he was gone. "John?" she called out.

No reply. He couldn't have gotten far though. As she stood up to go out in the hall, she was overcome with an intense feeling of sadness and desolation. It hit her like a physical blow and she staggered backwards gasping for breath.

No... _**JOHN!**_ " she cried out.

In a moment she was out the door and down the hall. She saw Weir and Caldwell standing by the ops console and noticed that the gate was dialing. She thought she heard someone say something about Sheppard being late reporting in. She ignored Caldwell's call to her and flew down the stairs just as the wormhole engaged. Simmons entered the control room at that moment and saw her flying down the stairs and moved to go after her.

"Logan!" he called.

She hit the floor and sprinted through the gate without stopping or looking back.

"What's wrong?" Simmons asked, looking over at Caldwell and Weir.

"Don't know. She bolted out of her office and down the steps without a word," Caldwell shrugged helplessly, deeply concerned.

"Where'd she go?" he asked.

"KR5-118... Sheppard and Mitchell are there with the Tollans," Caldwell replied.

"Looking for more Naquada, right... So why..."

"They're late checking in. We were dialing the planet to see why when she came running through." Weir added.

"Did she know that they're late checking in?"

"She might have heard us mention it while she ran by, but... Something set her off before that."

"Permission to go after her, sir?" Simmons asked.

"Go," he nodded emphatically.

Simmons grabbed a P-90 and a radio and then ran through the gate after Logan.

"Colonel Sheppard, Colonel Mitchell, please respond," Caldwell demanded.

"Major Lorne?" Weir asked.

"Lorne here," came the reply.

"Where are Colonels Sheppard and Mitchell?" Caldwell demanded.

"They're some ways away, sir. My team is securing the gate area, as ordered. May I ask why Colonel Devane came running through here, sir... And now Major Simmons?!" he sounded as confused and alarmed as they were.

"Where is Colonel Devane now, Major?" Caldwell asked.

"She took off in the direction Colonels Sheppard and Mitchell took the Tollans."

"Are you able to raise them on your radio, Major?" Caldwell asked.

"No sir... It's likely they're out of range. It's my understanding that they needed to get to the other side of this... gorge... They thought they might have found more of what we were looking for."

"We're sending another team through to guard the gate, when they get there, I want you to take Major Simmons and go find Sheppard and Mitchell, and the others. Understood?" Caldwell ordered.

"Yes sir."

Logan raced across the clearing as the teams pulled Mitchell onto the cliff. Logan could see the rope around him as he sank to his knees and covered his face. The others were standing around in stunned silence. "JOHN!" she called out.

Mitchell instantly sprang to his feet and moved to intercept her. "No!" he cried out, grabbing her and dragging her to the ground.

"Where _is_ he?!" she demanded.

"Logan..."

"No! Where _is_ he, Cameron?!" she cried desperately.

She managed to wriggle free of his grasp and hurl herself to the edge of the cliff, where Teal'c grabbed hold of her before she could tumble over the side. "Tell me where he is!" she demanded frantically.

"He is... gone..." Gere replied, only to be thrown backwards by an angry and devastated Daniel.

"SHUT... your... _mouth_!" he warned menacingly.

The cliff was very high, overlooking a very deep gorge. As she stared down, Logan could barely make out a still form at the bottom of the gorge.

"Gone?!" she murmured. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" she screamed.

Mitchell came up behind them and wrapped his arms around her as she struggled against both Teal'c and Mitchell.

"We have to get to him!" she screamed.

"We will," he assured her. "We are..."

"Now... We have to get to him NOW!" she screamed. What the hell was wrong with everyone? John was lying there, hurt, probably badly, and they were all standing around doing nothing. "MOVE!" she shouted.

"We can't get down that way, the ropes aren't long enough. We're going to have to go all the way back and around to get to where he is," Carter explained. That was the reason they'd tried a rope-crossing to begin with, but that had ended in disaster.

"Then let's GO!" she shrieked.

"Not you," Daniel said. "You don't need to..."

"He is MY husband, and he needs me! You aren't going to stop me!" she shrugged out of Mitchell's arms again and sped off in the direction Carter pointed out.

Daniel looked over at Mitchell's tear-stained face questioningly. "You know that's the _last_ thing she needs to see!" he said.

"Yeah, I do," he coughed. "And it's probably the only way she'll ever believe it."

"I know, but... Cameron... She can't see him like that!" Daniel complained.

"You know we can't stop her... All we can do now is to be there for her when..." he shook his head. "She's not ready to accept it yet, hell, I don't think I am either, but there's no way we're gonna stop her."

"She is strong. Surely she will come to..." Gere began.

"I thought he told you to SHUT YOUR MOUTH!" Mitchell barked at him.

"I believe it would be wise to send for Dr. Beckett, Colonel Mitchell," Teal'c pointed out.

"Yeah... Sergeant Rollins... Contact Atlantis and have them send Beckett out, and explain to them what happened. Tell them we're going to retrieve..." his voice cracked with emotion and he couldn't finish his order.

The rest of them began to follow Mitchell as he sprinted after Logan's rapidly disappearing form. Before they got far, though, he remembered to tell Gere and his team that they were not needed on this particular errand, nor were they welcome to witness what was about to come. He left no doubt in their minds that he would just as soon throw any one of them over the cliff if they failed to leave as requested.

Even as fast as Logan was moving, it didn't take him long to catch up to her and match her pace. He didn't try to dissuade her from going, he knew he couldn't, but he would be there for her when she reached the bottom, and what lay there. He didn't bother to hide or wipe away the tears that fell, nor did he attempt to speak to Logan. He merely offered quiet support as they made their way down the long path that circled down the side of the mountain to the floor of the gorge, which took at least two hours to accomplish.

He knew she had seen what he had. Some part of her had to know what they would find once they reached him, but she still clung to the hope that Sheppard was... He choked on the thought. When they reached the bottom, they followed the river back to the point where they had seen Sheppard lying. Incredibly, when they got there, Sheppard was nowhere to be found.

"John?!" she called out. "JOHN!"

The others fanned out and began searching the surrounding areas. There was no way that Sheppard could have gotten up and walked away, they all knew that. The amount of blood on the nearby rocks alone told a grim story. Even with the river washing away some of it, there was still far too much blood there for anyone to have survived.

"Where _is_ he?!" she demanded, frantically looking around.

"The river?" Teal'c ventured.

They all turned toward the river. It was possible that he'd been carried off by the current, as he'd fallen so close to the shore. If that were the case, he would also have been swept over the waterfall about a hundred yards downstream.

"Find him," Mitchell croaked.

Logan was crying inconsolably now, deep, heart-wrenching sobs that tore everyone to pieces. "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" she screamed.

LATER

Logan sat by the river's edge for hours while the rest of them searched. She refused to leave, or even to move. It was almost as though she expected him to suddenly appear there beside her. Mitchell kept watch over her, from a respectful distance, and kept anyone from going over to try and talk to her. She was lost in despair and grief, and it broke his heart. He kept a tight lid on his own grief, for now. Sheppard was his closest friend, and the one man he'd always felt comfortable confiding in. Suddenly, something made Logan sit up straighter and she began looking around.

"Logan? What is it?" he asked.

"I... What Gere said about John... That he's...gone..."

"Don't think about Gere right now, sweetheart," Mitchell said.

"No... I... He's wrong... He HAS to be... Even if John..." she trailed off as she looked down at the blood on her hands and clothes.

"He'll never really be gone, Logan..." Mitchell assured her.

"No... I know, but... He... where's Daniel?" she asked looking around.

"Here!" Daniel called out then made his way over to her. He sat down next to her and put an arm around her, pulling her close. He could feel her slender body shivering, from more than the cold, he imagined.

"Daniel... He could still be... If John thought that he wasn't going to... you know... survive..." her voice cracked with emotion. "He'd never leave me... He wouldn't..."

"What are you saying, sweetie?" he asked, though he was sure he knew.

"What if he didn't get taken by the river?" she asked.

They stared at her blankly.

"He'd do what he had to do... so he could come back to us..." she tried to smile, but her teeth were chattering.

"Honey, what..." Mitchell began, but one look at Daniel told him that Daniel knew where she was heading with this.

"Are you... Do you think he ascended?" Daniel asked.

Mitchell closed his eyes and turned slightly away so she wouldn't see. He knew, through his own conversations with Sheppard over the years that he wouldn't allow himself to be bound by any rules that would prevent him from helping people, especially Logan and his children.

"It's possible... If he saw no other way out, he would... If it meant that he could come back to us..." she ventured.

Daniel looked down at her long and hard, gauging his next words very carefully. "I suppose it's possible... But... how would he feel about being bound by the Ancient's rules about non-interference?" he asked.

"He wouldn't... need to, really. He would have just chosen to come back and take human form again."

"Sweetie, it doesn't work that way..." Daniel shook his head. She knew this. If only from her own experience with him all those years ago.

"You came back!" she shouted. "Janet did..." she began crying again. "John would do whatever it took to stay with us!"

She needed to believe that Sheppard HAD ascended, because by now, she could no longer deny the fact that there was no way for Sheppard to have survived a fall from such heights. She was grasping for any way, any chance to hope that he would still come back to her, as he always had before. For his part, Daniel hoped that she could be right, that Sheppard had indeed ascended and that one day he would return to them. But he knew that ascension didn't really work that way. One could not cheat death by ascending and then choosing to retake human form. The Ancients wouldn't allow it. He himself had been gone for over a year, Janet had been gone for several years. Each of them had been sent back because they had violated the rules and stepped in when they had been expressly forbidden to.

Mitchell, too, hoped that Logan was right, but the look on Daniel's face told him otherwise. Beckett approached and told her that they needed to get her away from the water's edge and back to the city.

"NO! I have to stay here... He'll be back!" she insisted.

"The others'll keep looking luv, but you're shivering from the cold and the shock and you're not doing yourself any good by..."

"I don't CARE!" she shouted.

"Come on, luv..." he pleaded.

"No! Daniel, _tell_ him. John will be back, and he'll need us so he can get home again!" she insisted, on the verge of losing it completely.

They could see that she was getting hysterical in her grief, so Beckett made the same hard choice he'd had to make earlier that year. He slipped a syringe out of his jacket pocket and motioned for them to hold her still. Mitchell balked, but Daniel forced himself to hold onto her.

"No Daniel! What are you doing? NOOOOOOO!" she screamed as Beckett plunged the needle into her hip.

"NOOOOOO!" she wailed, hitting out at Daniel, who wisely backed away a little.

Mitchell moved in and took her in his arms as the sedative rapidly took effect. She looked so betrayed as he smoothed the wild hair back off her face and cradled her against him.

"He needs me..." she cried weakly.

"Shhhhh..." Mitchell cooed.

"Cam, please... He'll be back..." she pleaded, her eyes glazing over.

"We'll keep looking," he promised.

"John..." she cried and then drifted into unconsciousness.

Beckett checked her vitals then nodded to Mitchell, who picked up her limp form and began carrying her to the jumper parked at the bottom of the trail. She was so cold and he asked Daniel to cover her with his jacket until he got her inside the jumper. Simmons caught up with them and climbed aboard while Mitchell settled Logan on one of the bench seats.

"How is she?" he asked sadly.

"Not good," Mitchell croaked.

"You had to sedate her?" he winced.

"Unfortunately," Beckett replied.

"How are you holding up?" Daniel asked.

"I'm managing," Simmons answered, barely holding his own emotions in check.

"I'm so sorry, Mike." Daniel said.

"Thanks... He... John was my brother, but... I..." he trailed off as a tear slid slowly down his face. "Logan is the one... He's been part of her life since the day she was born... She's the one who's..." he stopped as the tears began to fall in earnest.

They spent the rest of the trip home in silence, only to be met with silence when they landed in the jumper bay back in Atlantis. Beckett tried to get Mitchell to take Logan to the infirmary, where he could monitor her, but Mitchell refused, insisting that Logan would prefer to be in her own quarters.

"Where are the kids?" he asked Weir.

"They're with Janet..." she sniffled.

Mitchell nodded. "That's best, for now. She's uh... not up to... you know... Not yet."

Weir and Caldwell stepped aside and allowed Mitchell to carry Logan to the nearest transporter. Simmons stood there for a moment, then cleared his throat and turned to Weir.

"Where does Janet have the kids?" he asked.

"Her quarters, in Genoa."

"If you'll excuse me, I'd like to go check on my niece and nephew?" he asked Caldwell.

"Of course. I've already notified General Landry about what happened and told him you wouldn't be home tonight."

"Thank you, sir."

They watched as Simmons walked away and headed for the gateroom.

Caldwell then turned to Daniel. "I need to know what happened," he said.

"Yeah...I know..."

He and Weir led Daniel to Caldwell's office and closed the door behind them.

BACK ON KR5-118

Yehra looked up at the man who'd just entered the cave dwelling.

"Have they gone?" she asked.

"Not yet. They seem quite determined." Busek replied.

"And quite cruel. How they could throw that man from the cliff... What manner of people give so little value to life that they could murder one of their own?"

"They are not a people we want anything to do with."

"It is fortunate they have not detected our presence, Busek. Let us hope that our luck continues to hold."

Busek looked at her questioningly for a moment. "I wonder, Yehra, was it all of them who threw the man from the cliffs, or just a few?"

She shrugged. "I did not see. I saw the man falling and I saw the men on the cliffs above him. Does it matter how many did the deed, if the others simply stood by and watched?"

"No," he shook his head sadly. "I suppose not."

"This world is no longer safe for our people, Busek. As soon as these out-worlders leave, we must do the same."

"You are sure they would come back?" he asked.

"I am. They seemed to be looking for something before they threw the man from the cliffs. My heart tells me they will not stop until they find it. I will not chance that these murderous people would treat our people any better than they did one of their own."

Busek nodded. "I will let you know the moment it is safe to travel."

After he left, Yehra thought back to the events she'd witnessed earlier in the day. She cringed at the memory of the stranger falling to his death, helpless to prevent it. She could not speak to the intent of the ones she had not seen, but there was one she had seen who demonstrated...pleasure...yes, she was sure she had seen pleasure in his eyes as he passed by her hiding place in the bushes. It was then that she knew she had to protect her people from them.

ATLANTIS

Shock and an overwhelming sense of sadness hung over the city as news spread about the fate of John Sheppard. Everywhere one went in the halls, people were either crying or walking about in shocked silence, almost robotic-like. John Sheppard had been well-loved and respected by the people here. Those in the control room watched through the windows, from their seats, as their commanders received a full-briefing from some of those who had been there to witness Sheppard's demise.

"So he and Gere were the only ones to fall when the ropes snapped?" Caldwell asked.

"They were the ones farthest out. Bell and Williams were only about three feet from the edge when the rope snapped. They landed on our side and still had a firm grip on the line. Gere went down, he apparently landed on a tree or root system...something, so he didn't fall all the way down..." Daniel explained.

"And Sheppard?"

"He...uh...He had a pretty firm grip on the line when it snapped, but he was slammed up against the face of the cliff on the other side. I'm not sure how it happened, maybe when it first snapped, but he dislocated his shoulder, and when he hit the wall, he said he felt his arm break," Daniel croaked.

"So he only had one good arm?" Weir asked.

"Yes. Mitchell got another line set immediately and John tried to hold on, but...He...Mitchell was about three feet from him when his strength gave out and he... fell...He said something to Mitchell right before that...I don't know what it was...Mitchell lunged to try and catch him, but he wasn't close enough..." Tears began streaming down Daniel's face again.

"How did you find Gere?" Weir asked, trying not to picture John Sheppard falling helplessly.

"He...uh...he called out to us...for help...We couldn't see him at first, it was pretty misty and there were a lot of shrubs and tree parts sticking out of the side of the cliffs. It took us a while to get him back up the side again. Logan arrived shortly after that, right about the time we'd pulled Mitchell back across the gorge to us."

"And you guys think Sheppard's... body... was swept down the river...after he...?"

Daniel cringed at the memory. "We could see where he... came down... There was blood... all over the rocks... It was very close to the edge, it's the only logical explanation for why his... body... disappeared."

"And what of Logan's theory? That John ascended?" Weir asked hopefully.

Daniel looked down sadly. "I would like to believe... But honestly, I don't see the others allowing that. IF he ascended and, for his sake, I hope he didn't simply just... die... I don't see the others allowing him to just turn around and unascend again... As a way of cheating death..."

They all fell silent while they processed that last bit of information. The loss of John Sheppard was an enormous one, for all of them, and the effects of such a loss would be far-reaching, on many levels. Many had called him friend as well as leader. His ease and expertise with ancient technology had been invaluable over the years. There were few people Caldwell, himself, trusted more than Sheppard, in the field or on the base, and he would miss him terribly, as a warrior and a friend. Logan was one of only a handful of people he trusted the way he trusted Sheppard, but she was not likely to be in any condition to perform her duties for a long while.

He tried to push away his own grief, but was nearly overcome at the thought of how Sheppard's loss would affect her and the children. It tore him up as he realized that those children would not really remember the father who loved and cherished them so deeply. That all they would have of him would be photographs and stories, maybe vague memories or images of the man who'd been their father. Logan would, of course, do her best to keep Sheppard's memory alive in them, but he also knew that the mere thought of them growing up without him was enough to tear her apart.

John Sheppard had been her rock, her world, for her entire life. How was she supposed to go on in a world without that, without him, especially when that was all she'd ever known? Yes, Logan was strong. Stronger than anyone he'd ever met, but she had her limits. He was sure that trying to build a life without Sheppard in it, would be far beyond that limit. She had her children, yes, but would that be enough to keep her from shutting down entirely? He believed that the kids could be her salvation, if she hadn't already shut down. That was one of the reasons Beckett had for sedating her. He knew she was on the verge of losing it, as cold reality began to settle in her mind. He hadn't wanted her to shut down. He wanted her to rest, to have a chance to work through the shock and to see her children, so she could realize that she still had a reason to go on.

Caldwell was dreading having to tear Mitchell away from Logan's side, so that he could be debriefed. He'd been putting it off, out of respect for Mitchell's own grief over losing his best friend. His superiors would be demanding it though, and soon. The military machine had to keep humming, even after a loss as devastating as this one. All of his people knew that, but it still didn't make it any easier. They were a tight knit bunch, the Pegasus contingent, not just the Atlantis team. They would be reeling from this loss for a long time to come.

Seeing that Daniel was very near the end of his rope, he dismissed him, so that he could go and be with his own family, though he was sure his first stop would be at Logan's quarters, to check up on her. He told everyone else to take a break as well, and resolutely went off to retrieve Mitchell.


	62. Chapter 62

Mitchell sat in the corner of her darkened bedroom and just watched her sleep. When they first arrived, he'd carefully stripped off her bloodstained clothes and put a nightshirt on her, all while keeping his eyes respectfully averted. He then proceeded to wash the blood off of her hands with a washcloth, until every last trace of Sheppard's blood was gone. When he'd accomplished that, he took her clothes to the incinerator chute, as they would never come clean in the wash, and he didn't want her to face looking at the bloodstained clothes.

Once he had her comfortably settled in, he'd sent for a change of clothes and then stripped down and took a quick shower, so that he wouldn't have any of Sheppard's blood on himself when she woke up. While in the shower, he'd allowed himself to vent a little of his grief, so he would be stronger when Logan needed him. He wanted to see the children, just to make sure they were, indeed, alright, but he couldn't bear to leave Logan while he made the hop to Genoa.

Now, all he could do was watch over her, and think. He'd tried, desperately, to get the image of Sheppard falling out of his mind, but it kept playing over and over and over again. He felt guilty and responsible, for not being able to reach his injured friend in time to save him. She hadn't blamed him for Sheppard's death, yet, but she'd been in shock and denial before Beckett administered the heavy sedative. Once that wore off, she would blame him, and rightfully so. He should have been the one to go across first, not Sheppard. He should have been the one who fell to his death in that gorge. John had a wife, a family... Mitchell had neither. A soft knock at the door brought him our of his reverie. He stood slowly and walked out to the other room to answer the door. Caldwell and Simmons stood there.

"I thought you were with the kids... Are they okay?" he asked, deeply concerned.

Simmons held up a hand. "They're okay, Cam. I figured you'd be worried about them, so I wanted to reassure you. They know something's wrong, though. Damned if I know HOW they know, but they do."

"Do they know about John?" he gasped in horror.

"No... No, we didn't tell them, but they've been antsy, and asking for their parents every ten minutes or so. Janet's doing a good job of keeping them distracted."

"Good...good..." Mitchell murmured gratefully.

"How's Logan?" he asked.

"She's still sleeping."

"Dr. Beckett tells me she's likely to sleep for a few more hours," Caldwell said.

"Yeah..." he looked back in the direction of the bedroom. "Too bad she can't stay asleep until she's worked through all the grief..."

"It'd be nice if it worked that way," Caldwell agreed.

"General Caldwell tells me that you still have to be debriefed, so I offered to stay with Logan..." Simmons began.

"No!" Mitchell blurted out.

"Excuse me?" Simmons said, somewhat taken aback.

"I'm sorry... Look, no offense, Mike, but if she wakes up and sees you there, it'll freak her out," he explained. "You look so damned much like him, and she's going to be confused when she starts to come out of it..."

"I see your point," Simmons admitted.

"She's going to sleep for hours, Mitchell. I promise you, we won't take long for debriefing. You'll be back long before she wakes up." Caldwell assured him.

"I... She might..." Mitchell stammered.

"Come on, son. The sooner we get this over with, the sooner you can come back," he prodded.

"I... Very well, sir." Mitchell finally gave in.

"Dr. Beckett was planning to come by to check on her anyway, and he may just give her more sedative to make sure she sleeps through the night. He figures it might give her body the strength she'll need to get through what she has to go through in the next few days," Caldwell informed him as they walked down the hall.

True to his word, Caldwell didn't keep him long, and he made it back to Logan's quarters within twenty minutes. It had been excruciating for him to tell them every little detail of what had led to Sheppard's death. Especially so when Weir asked him what it was John had said to him right before he fell.

"He... asked me... to take care of his family," he croaked hoarsely. "He made me promise..."

Mitchell felt a fresh wave of tears wash over him as he recalled the look in Sheppard's eyes. He knew he couldn't hold on, and his last thoughts were for his family. He'd known, of course, that Mitchell would take care of them, but Mitchell knew he needed to hear the words, so that he could have at least some measure of peace. He swore that he'd take care of them, but at the same time, he was urging John to hold on for just a few moments longer. Then he'd seen the resignation in his eyes as his fingers began to slip. Mitchell closed his eyes and shook his head, trying to clear the image from his mind again.

Beckett had come while he was gone, and he had given her an extra dose of the sedative to make sure she slept the rest of the night. Mitchell hoped that her dreams were laced with images of happier times, with John and the kids, and not the horrific ones of her husband lying dead at the bottom of the gorge. After sending Simmons back to Genoa, he went in and sat next to Logan on the bed, gently brushing her hair back from her face. He allowed himself to cry a little more, then planted himself in the chair he'd taken earlier in the corner of the room.

Weir, Caldwell, Daniel and O'Neill were standing together in the hallway outside Logan's quarters. Both O'Neill and Hammond had come when they heard the news, but both men felt helpless to comfort anyone, much less Logan. They'd grown extremely fond of Sheppard since he joined the Atlantis expedition, and they felt his loss keenly. Suddenly, they heard Logan screaming from inside her quarters.

Their first instinct would have been to rush inside and make sure she was okay, but they knew that would be a mistake. Mitchell was with her, and he was closer to her than any of them now, even Daniel. The time they'd spent, stranded together, had bonded them in a way that she'd never bonded with them. What she'd shared with Mitchell during that time, though not the physical intimacy she'd once shared with Daniel, had brought them as close as any two friends could be. Not as close as she and Sheppard had been, of course, but closer than she'd been to anyone else, even Daniel.

"No, no, no Cameron, NOOOOOOOOOOO!" she screamed.

"I'm sorry, sweetie, I'm so sorry," he cooed, holding her tightly against him.

"We have to go back! He'll be waiting for us..." she wailed. "He might be confused, or... he might not remember right now... Daniel didn't know who he was, at first... _Please_!" she pleaded.

He gently explained that they had had people searching for John all night long and that they wouldn't leave until ordered to do so.

"But... he NEEDS me," she wailed inconsolably. "Please Cam, PLEASE?!"

He continued to hold and rock her until she wound down out of sheer exhaustion. Even then, she continued to quietly cry.

Out in the hall, Dr. Heightmeyer had joined the others and was advising them on how to proceed.

"Honestly? The best thing for her psyche right now, would be for the search teams to find his body."

"The best thing for her would be if Sheppard weren't dead at all, Doctor!" Caldwell scolded.

"Of course. What I'm saying is... Especially given the past they've shared, what happened to Logan before, in Afghanistan. She's going to hold onto the notion that Sheppard somehow managed to survive that fall. That he's still alive out there somewhere and will be returning to her."

"Or that he's ascended as a way to cheat death and come back?" Daniel added.

"Yes, or that. after all, you came back, as did Dr. Frasier. Logan needs concrete proof that he's gone, or she will never allow herself to believe it."

"How do we help her accept it, if we don't find his body?" Caldwell asked.

"Like I said, I don't know that she can, or will, if there's no body. She needs time and patience and love. She needs to feel... safe. She needs to focus on everything she still has here, and not just on her loss."

"That's a tall order, Doctor." Weir said.

"I'm aware of that. But we have to try."

INSIDE THE SHEPPARD QUARTERS

"Please, please take me back, Cam?" Logan begged.

"They haven't found him yet, sweetie, we'll be the first ones they notify, if they do."

"They're looking for a body, not HIM!"

Mitchell looked down at her and took her face in his hands. "Logan, honey, listen to me... Why did you go tearing out of here before anyone even knew that anything was wrong?" he asked.

"I...I..."

"What?" he prodded.

"He... I saw him, Cam... In my office," her lips quivered as she spoke.

"You saw John in your office?" he asked.

"Yes... He was just standing there, looking at me... And I... knew..."

"What did you know?" he prodded gently.

"That he was... that he needed me."

"How?" He knew the answer, based on what she'd just told him, but she needed to make the admission.

"I...got very cold... all of a sudden, and I felt this... pain... I couldn't breathe, I couldn't speak... And I just... knew."

"Knew what, Logan?"

"That he was gone..." she sucked in a deep, pained breath. "I... FELT... him go..." she began sobbing again and buried her face in his chest.

After a few days, and at Heightmeyer's insistence, Caldwell allowed Mitchell to take her back to the planet, so she could see for herself that Sheppard was not there. She was calmer now, mainly for the sake of the children, who were simply too young to understand the concept of death. She and Mitchell and Simmons had explained, as best they could, that their father was... gone... Though there was still a part of her that did not fully believe that. They had no idea what she meant when she explained that their Daddy would not be living with them anymore, and in their limited vocabulary, they demanded to be taken to where he was.

It was extremely difficult for her to look at Simmons; he resembled Sheppard so strongly. So, she constantly found herself averting her eyes whenever he was around. It wasn't that she didn't want him there, it was just...hard. Though so similar in appearance, his was not the face she ached to see coming through the door. Mitchell had been rock-solid in his support, and he'd been a great source of strength and comfort, but, as expected, her children were the ones who saved her sanity. They gave her purpose. They made her wake up every morning and gave her a reason to remember to breathe. Were it not for them, she knew she would have curled up into a ball and willed herself to die.

She didn't fight him when Mitchell told her it was time to go home. She nodded sadly, then picked a bunch of wildflowers and placed them on the spot where she'd seen Sheppard lying motionless, at the bottom of the gorge, next to the river. She'd gasped, upon seeing the still bloodstained rocks, but she held onto her composure. Holding out a hand to Mitchell, she asked him to take her home to her children.

Busek watched them curiously, from his hidden perch high above. The woman was incredibly beautiful, and desperately sad. It gave him pause, for apparently not everyone among his people wanted the man to perish the way he had. He wondered who the woman was, and if she knew that the man accompanying her had been one of the men who'd taken part in the murder of the one she so clearly grieved. He was almost tempted to warn her, but that would mean exposing himself and his people, and he could not do that.

SEVERAL DAYS LATER

The memorial ceremony for Sheppard was excruciatingly sad, for everyone in Atlantis. If Logan hadn't been operating in a fog, she might have been pleased and touched to know that many members of the International Committee had even been in attendance, along with the Generals Hammond, O'Neill and Landry. As it was, Logan couldn't remember much about the ceremony, since during the entire day, she kept hearing a repeating chorus of "Nononononononono" in her mind.

Yes, she knew he was gone. She'd felt it. She believed it, for the most part anyway. Maybe it was simply that she had now numbed herself to the pain, at least as much as she could. Her grief wrapped around her like a shield, and she used it to keep everyone at bay, with the exception of her children. She would not allow anyone to get close enough to break through the shield she'd put up around herself. She was too... raw.

watch?v=BwyWmqV_RJc

There was only one part of the ceremony that she even remembered clearly. Toward the end of the ceremony, the children were allowed to take the wreath of flowers and gently push it through the gate, in silent homage to their father. It was purely symbolic, sending the wreath through to the world where he died, but it gave the children some small sense that they were sending their Daddy a final gift. She held on to her stoic soldier composure, but only just barely. The children cried, not because they really understood, but because everyone else was, and because they missed their father.

She was surrounded by people who loved her, who had loved John, but she never felt so completely alone in her entire life. Her soulmate, the biggest piece of her, had been ripped from her life, and there was nothing there but a big, gaping hole where her heart used to be. She'd assured Mitchell that she would go on, whatever that meant, for the sake of her children but, she admitted, that she would never be the same again.

The others could see how raw and exposed she felt and they did their best to keep a subtle buffer zone around her. The mourners were sincere in their desire to reach out to her, to express their condolences, but it was all so overwhelming and, they were afraid, it might prove to be too much for her to handle in her fragile state. So the ones closest to her made sure they were always near enough to head off the crush of mourners who wanted to speak with her. Pretty much everyone was gracious enough to understand that she was in too much pain to deal with them, everyone except Gere of the Tollan. When Daniel tried to head off his advance, he was met with a hostility he hadn't expected. Gere was determined to speak with Logan, and nothing Daniel said to him seemed to be dissuading him. Simmons noticed this and, rather than interceding directly, he went to Tarik and asked him to please send Gere away, lest he upset Logan any further. Tarik agreed and gently but firmly escorted Gere back through the stargate.

"How are you holding up?" Weir asked Simmons.

"I'm...okay...I think. I wish I'd had a chance to get to know him better, but...I'm happy for the time we were able to share. I just hope that Logan allows me to...try...and help her through this."

"She doesn't often ask for help," Weir informed him.

"So I understand. She's quite strong..." he observed.

"And stubborn," Weir added.

"Yes... And quite vulnerable right now. What is the DEAL with that Tollan guy, Gere?" he asked.

"I think he's been in love with her since the day they met, and will be to the day he dies," she explained.

"Oh?"

Weir shrugged. "It's a...Tollan thing," she explained. "When they fall, they fall hard, and for life. Tarik's brother fell for Sam Carter years ago, and loved her til the day he died in a Goa'uld attack on his planet. He knew that they would never be able to really be together, but he couldn't help it. He chose to be alone, rather than live a lie with some other woman he could never truly love."

"That's really very...sad. You don't think this guy is dangerous, do you? I mean now that John is...He won't try to..."

"No, I don't think so. violence is extremely rare in Tollan culture, usually only in defense of their people or their world."

"Good to know. He just seemed so determined to speak to her... Even when Daniel told him she couldn't handle it right now."

"He'll back off, now that Tarik has had a chance to explain to him."

"Good."

He felt a tug on his pant leg and looked down to find Nic staring up at him. "Unca Mike," he said, lifting his arms up. "Up!" he demanded.

Simmons smiled and picked up his nephew, hugging him tightly to his chest for a moment. Nic snuggled into the curve between his shoulder and neck and stuck his thumb in his mouth. The thumbsucking was new, and probably a result of missing his father. "Where's your sister, sport?"

Nic pointed across the room. "Unca Cammen," he said around his thumb.

"You hungry?"

Nic nodded.

"What say we go grab a bite to eat?" Simmons asked.

Through the fog, Logan kept a close watch on where her children were at all times, and who they were with. She was relieved to see that they stuck close to either Mitchell or Simmons, who were more than happy to carry them around. She knew they were safe with these men, and it gave her a chance to... breathe... a little.


	63. Chapter 63

SEVEN MONTHS LATER

There was something inordinately satisfying about blowing a Wraith hive ship out of the sky. Once they'd ascertained for certain that the hive ship had not been able to send out any type of message, telepathic or otherwise, the people of Atlantis were able to revel and celebrate another successful test of their weapons systems. They knew the ion cannons worked, they had before. But it was still nice to see that the system could be counted on. Logan opted out of the congratulatory hugs and slaps on the back, however, choosing instead to go back to her office and begin writing her reports. Caldwell and Weir watched her go and exchanged knowing glances.

"She still won't allow anyone to get too close," Caldwell shook his head.

"Yes... She's behaving almost as if physical contact would burn her skin or something," Weir noted. "She seems better, otherwise, but she's just not as open and... I don't know... She's still so guarded."

"It's been seven months," he began. "But then that's nothing really, compared to spending your whole life with someone."

"No, it isn't. She IS getting better, though. She's come a long way back from where she was seven months ago..."

"Yeah... I hate to think what would have happened to her if she didn't have the kids..." Caldwell said.

"I think we both know the answer to that," Weir replied.

"She'd have to know that Sheppard wouldn't want that!" Caldwell said, clearly shaken by the thought.

"Sure. But how do you convince a broken heart of that? Or a broken spirit?" Weir sighed.

"Well, It's all a moot point, right? She _does_ have the kids, and they're the ones who gave her a reason to go on with her life."

"Right, so no worries then."

Daniel walked up behind them as they spoke. "I hear we have one more less Wraith Hive ship to worry about. How's she doing?" Motioning to Logan.

"When the hive ship blew up, I think that's the first time in seven months that I've seen her smile at something other than the children," Caldwell told him.

"That's a good sign."

"She still won't let anyone get close to her," Weir added.

"Yeah... I noticed that. The other night I reached out and put a hand on her shoulder in the mess hall and she about jumped out of her skin. She was nice about it, but she definitely put some physical distance between us."

"I would have thought she'd feel more comfortable with you, given your past together and your long-standing friendship," Weir said.

"Yeah... I think that might actually make it worse," he winced.

"How so?" Caldwell asked.

"She's... She doesn't want to be close to anyone any more, except for the kids of course. Doesn't matter if she's known someone for five years or five minutes, she's got that wall up and it doesn't look like it's coming down any time soon."

"She needs more time," Caldwell observed.

"And patience," Weir added.

"And space," Daniel said.

"We'll give her whatever she needs. We already lost Sheppard, we're damn sure not gonna lose her, too!" Caldwell stated, then turned on his heel and walked away.

LATER

Logan stood out on the balcony looking out to sea. It had taken six months for Simmons and the others to convince her that it might be a good idea to move to new quarters. Not that she needed smaller or even larger quarters, just that it might help her to make a fresh start by living in quarters she'd never shared with Sheppard before. Purely symbolic, of course, but she finally recognized the validity of their argument.

The new quarters were in a different wing entirely, as if the distance between her old and new quarters would be enough to put more distance between her and her grief. Still, it didn't hurt to try. She still had all of John's things, so it wasn't like she was leaving him completely behind her, as if she could ever do that.

The children liked the new quarters and their respective bedrooms, that was all that mattered to her. Chelsea was now three years old, and Nic was two. She had her hands full with both of them, who seemed to be growing like weeds. In them, as with Ryan and Matt, she saw John on a daily basis. In them, she saw his beautiful green eyes gazing back at her adoringly. His smile, his facial expressions... they were both nearly carbon copies of their father, Nic a little bit moreso than Chelsea, since she was a girl, but she was definitely a feminine version of John Sheppard. Rather than making her sadder, she was enormously grateful to have these two loving tributes to the man she loved with her entire being. John would always live on in them, and she was finally able to find some comfort in that.

She was still rather twitchy about anyone other than the children trying to touch her, though she wasn't entirely sure why it bothered her so much. Yes, she knew that she would never feel THAT connected to anyone after losing John, but... They WERE her friends, after all. Why couldn't she accept a comforting hug now and then? Perhaps she just didn't really WANT to be comforted? Perhaps that meant letting go of the last vestige of denial she felt about losing John? She wasn't sure. She knew it worried them, and she was trying to be more accommodating, but she still wasn't quite ready to let go just yet.

At least with her children she could be free and open. It had taken her several months before she'd felt able to acquiesce to the children's request for her to sing to them again at bedtime. She'd felt, for a long time, that she'd lost her voice, she knew she'd lost her spirit there for a while, but she just couldn't bring herself to sing, not even for them. They would settle for a tune on the guitar, but even that had been stretching it for her. Heightmeyer finally said something, by way of explanation, that made sense to her: "A wounded soul doesn't feel the joy in music." She didn't always get it right, where Logan was concerned, but that made sense to her. And Chelsea had finally gotten her to dance with her, during their exercise time. That hadn't been easy, either, but after forcing herself a few times, she was able to let go a little and allow herself to enjoy dancing and playing with her daughter.

She gasped and suddenly checked her watch. Speaking of exercise, she was running late to pick up Chelsea for their workout "date" in the gym. She dashed out the door and down to the daycare center. Chelsea scolded her a bit, for keeping her waiting, but she was soon happily chattering on about her morning activities. They spent an hour in the gym, just the two of them, and had a great time. Afterwards, she ran Chelsea back to the daycare, but had to return to the gym, as Chelsea had forgotten her little "workout bag." As she turned to leave, she saw Gere standing in the doorway.

"Gere!" she gasped. "You startled me."

"I apologize. I did not mean to frighten you," he said with a smile.

"I didn't say you _frightened_ me, I said you STARTLED me," she corrected him irritably.

She hadn't so much as spoken to the man since that incident where she went into premature labor after arguing with him about Mitchell.

"Again, I apologize."

"Fine. I have to get back to work soon, so if you'll excuse me?" she muttered.

"I wonder if I might have a moment of your time?" he asked.

"What is it, Gere?"

"I wanted to express my condolences... I wasn't allowed to do so at the memorial..." he trailed off.

"Thank you. Is that all?" she was being quite snippy with him, she knew, but there was something about him that was setting her off.

"I wanted to see... how you were doing."

"Ducky, thanks!" she sniped.

"Please, Logan, I really just want to help."

"That's very kind of you, really, but I don't need any..."

"You still grieve for him," he observed, cutting her off.

"Yes, of course I do... I am..." she stammered uncomfortably. She didn't want to discuss Sheppard with anyone, least of all Gere.

"It has been a year already," he pointed out.

"So I should be over it by now?" she sneered derisively.

"You are allowed to feel happiness again, Logan, you have every right to..."

"My children give me happiness," it was her turn to cut him off.

"You are allowed to feel pleasure again, too..." he stopped at the look on her face.

"Back off, Gere, you are way over the line now!" she warned.

"Please... I mean no disrespect, on the contrary, I want only to make you happy."

"If you want to make me happy then stand aside and let me leave," she said through gritted teeth.

"I have waited a long time for you..."

Okay, Logan thought, this is going from bad to worse. "Gere, I've already _warned_ you, now I'm _telling_ you, get away from the door and leave me alone!" She felt suddenly very naked and exposed, especially without her sidearm.

"I...can't...do...that...Not anymore."

She watched with growing dread as the look in his eyes changed from one of longing, to one of predatory hunger. "You don't have a choice," she said.

"In that you are correct. Do you remember when we talked about how my people mate for life?"

She refused to answer him.

"You knew then that I had feelings for you. Those feelings have only gotten stronger over time. You are free to be with me now. Allow me to love you freely. You and your children..."

"NO!" she barked. "No, Gere, _never_."

"Please do not say that," he rushed forward and tried to take her in his arms.

She instinctively blocked his attempt and pivoted away from him. "You are _out_ of your mind!" she said, backing away from him.

"That is entirely possible, nevertheless... I will do what I have to do," he murmured.

"What is that supposed to mean?" she asked.

"Everything... Everything I have done, I did so we could be together."

The dread that had been washing over her now became a cold, hard lump in the pit of her stomach. "What do you mean?" she asked. "What have you done?"

"What I had to do, of course."

"Which is?"

"I built a life for us... to share... a place, a HOME where we can be together. I wanted to surprise you, but I never get a chance to speak with you... Not with your guard dogs patrolling your very doorstep... Always in the way... Always... like Sheppard..."

"Gere, leave now, before things turn really ugly."

"It can be beautiful, you know... It WILL be beautiful, I will show you." With that, he unexpectedly lunged for her and tackled her to the floor. Logan came out swinging and kicking, anything to get him off of her, but the more she fought, the stronger he appeared to become. "I love you, Logan, with every fiber of my being..." he said breathlessly, trying to hold her down.

"You just keep your fibers away from MY being!" she yelled, furious.

"Why do you fight me so?"

"Because you're creeping me out, you _lunatic_. I don't love you, I don't WANT you!" she screamed, freeing her right hand and landing a hard right cross to his jaw.

Gere instinctively reacted by punching her back. Blood spurted from her bottom lip and she gasped in shock at the blow. Renewing her efforts to break free, she continued to kick out any way she could, desperately trying to throw him off of her. She nearly broke free, but the sudden tearing of her blouse and the sight of exposed skin seemed to fuel him further.

"If you will not come to me freely, I will have to show you here, how wonderful it can be for us," he warned.

"NOOOO!" she screamed as his mouth came down hard on hers.

She bit his lip, drawing blood, then managed to hit him again when he drew back to look at her in surprise. She kept punching at him until she was able to get her legs under him and throw him over her shoulder. His Tollan weapon skidded across the floor and she immediately ran after it, but he grabbed her around the waist from behind before she could reach it. She continued to kick and punch at him, but it all seemed ineffectual. He had her feet off the floor, so she couldn't fight his forward momentum as he moved them toward a pile of exercise mats resting against the wall.

What she could do, however, was a nifty little manuever that Sheppard had taught her long, long ago. Once Gere had her near enough where she could use the wall for leverage, she simply "walked up" the side of the wall and flipped over his shoulder, so that she was now behind him. She delivered a hard, swift kidney punch to his left side, dropping him to his knees, then another to his right, which sent him face down on the floor. She quickly turned around and tried to locate his weapon, but in so doing, she didn't see him get back up and lunge at her again. As they continued to struggle, Gere's mind flashed back to a time a year previously. A time when he had fortuitously set everything he wanted into motion:

 _Sheppard winced in agony as he hit the protruding tree roots. It took a moment for his vision to clear, so intense was the pain. Gere looked at him, in stunned shock as they both hung precipitously from the roots extending from the side of the cliff wall. Both men were equally shocked that Sheppard hadn't fallen to his death, but had bounced off the wall into the very safety net that Gere had._

 _"Hope you don't mind me just dropping by," Sheppard said wryly, despite the excruciating pain. "Mind giving me a hand?" he asked, though Gere was one of the last people he preferred to have to ask for help._

 _"And why would I do that?" Gere responded seriously. He had been overjoyed to see Sheppard lose his tenuous grip just scant seconds earlier._

 _Sheppard froze and looked over at him. Sh*t! Gere had him right where he wanted him. Sheppard had gone from KNOWING he was about to die, having said goodbye to Mitchell not seconds before, to feeling a sense of reprieve when he bounced off the cliffs and into these tree roots. He couldn't use his right arm to hold on, and his left was rapidly losing its grip - again. Now, looking into Gere's eyes, Sheppard knew with certainty - again - that he was dead._

 _"Logan deserves better than you, Sheppard. And I will see that she gets everything she deserves."_

 _Gere smiled malevolently at him as he began stomping on Sheppard's left hand. Just as he took a breath to call out to Mitchell, his hand slipped and he began to fall. Gere watched him fall until the mist obscured his view. He couldn't believe his luck, at having Sheppard land right in his lap, as it were, and he took it as a sign that his plans had been blessed and now it was time to make his move._

"Sheppard wasn't worthy of you!" he said, dodging another of her blows.

"What did you _do_?!" she asked.

"I freed you from your burden," he said, quite mad now. "And now I'm going to take you away from this place, full of nothing but bad memories."

She threw him off of her and he rolled over, surprised to find his weapon right by his side. He picked it up and aimed it at her. "This will only stun you, Logan..." he said, squeezing the trigger.

"NO!" she screamed and dove away.

The blast hit her left leg, and she lost all feeling in that leg, but continued to try and drag herself away from him.

"I killed him so we could be together," he informed her.

THAT made her stop and turn back. Pure, seething, white-hot rage and hatred ignited in her eyes, intense enough to give him pause. She threw herself at him and knocked him to the ground. They rolled around on the floor, fighting for control of the weapon, which skidded away again when she punched him right in the face. He hit her, hard, across the face, causing her to see stars, but she landed a little closer to the weapon. As her hand drew near, he grabbed her legs, to keep her from getting any closer to it, and tried to pull her back. Her blouse was now torn almost completely off her body, and it was only making Gere more aggressive.

When the wepon was mere inches from her fingertips, she heard a noise across the gym and used the momentary distraction to kick free of him with her good foot. Grabbing the weapon, she rolled over and fired right at his face. At the same time, a zat blast, fired from somewhere behind her hit him and he went down in a heap at her feet.

"Logan!" she heard a familiar voice call out to her. Two voices, actually.

She looked up and saw Mitchell sprinting towards her. Behind her, she heard Simmons call out her name. "Logan?"

Mitchell scooped her up in his arms, after removing his jacket and placing it around her shoulders. She didn't fight him, but collapsed against his chest and began to sob inconsolably. Fearful that she was hurt, when she didn't pull away, he lifted her off the floor intent on heading for the infirmary.

"He's not dead," Simmons told them, after checking for a pulse.

"Too bad!" Mitchell acidly.

Still sobbing, Logan glanced up at Mitchell. "He... killed... John!" she wailed.

"What?!" Mitchell and Simmons froze and exchanged glances, utterly stunned.

"He...told...me..." she sobbed.

Though they wanted to hear everything, Mitchell was far too worried about her to stop, so he continued on to the infirmary. When they burst through the door, Beckett looked up, startled.

"What's this then? Logan, what happened, luv?"

"She was attacked in the gym... By the Tollan... Gere..." Mitchell said, breathless with fear and anger.

"The same one..." Beckett began.

"Yeah, same guy."

Caldwell was first to arrive in the infirmary, upon hearing the news. He'd been livid, wanting to cut off all ties to the Tollans in his anger, but Weir talked him into letting her and Tarik handle the situation. Tarik had been mortified to learn what Gere had done, and he assured them that he would have Gere severely punished for his crimes, so the Lanteans wouldn't have to be bothered. But Caldwell had refused to allow Gere to leave Atlantis and had him immediately sent to the brig. Tarik thought it best, for the time being, to remove himself from the city, while the anger was so fresh in their hearts. He did not want to be a constant reminder of what they had suffered at the hands of a Tollan. He assured Weir that they would work things out later, gave her a kiss and left to handle things on Tollana.

Caldwell listened at the door as Logan explained how Gere had been the one who killed, rather than saved, Sheppard that horrible day the year before. It had been a miracle that he'd bounced off the wall and landed in that protruding root system. A miracle that should have resulted in the safe rescue of John Sheppard, but instead, ended in his murder at the hands of a demented madman.

Mitchell held her as she cried over this new revelation. It was evident that she felt responsible for what Gere had done, and Mitchell fervently assured her that she was in no way responsible for Gere's actions. She hadn't had any contact with him in over two years and she'd done nothing to encourage his advances. The one responsible for Sheppard's death, for his _murder_ , was Gere.

The wounds that were just beginning to heal in Atlantis were now ripped open again, as word spread through the city about what had REALLY happened to Sheppard. Weir was as furious as the rest of them, but she was also concerned about the possible backlash against the Tollan people for the actions of one man. Her husband, the father of her child, was one of the leaders of the Tollans, and she feared for his safety when he set foot back in Atlantis. She knew that hers were good people, but they were angry. Incredibly, rightfully angry. Gere would pay for what he'd done. It wouldn't be enough, but he would pay.

Daniel arrived, just as Beckett came out of the exam room, and they pounced on him. "How is she?"

"Well, she's pretty bruised up, and one of her ribs is cracked. She's got a badly sprained wrist and ankle. The cut on her lip won't require stitches, it should heal fine in a bit. There's no internal bleeding, and he never had the chance to finish what he started."

Daniel gasped and looked from Caldwell to Beckett. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, she wasn't raped, though it was clear that, that's what he intended. She put up one hell of a fight, General. I hope he looks a hundred times worse than she does," he added grimly.

Their faces had flushed red with anger as Beckett spoke.

"He should be dead, Doctor," Caldwell hissed. "I saw him when they took him to the brig. Logan gave at LEAST as good as she got," he said with a small sense of pride in her.

"When can we see her?" Daniel asked.

"I gave her something for the pain, so she'll be nodding off soon. I let Colonel Mitchell stay with her, since she was finally allowing SOMEONE to hold her for a change. Why don't you wait until she's out, then you can just have a quick peek."

They nodded. "Thank you, Doctor," Caldwell said.

"She should stay here tonight, so we'll need to make arrangements for the wee ones," he added.

Simmons arrived at that moment and stepped in. "I'll take care of them tonight, if I have your permission to stay, sir?" he asked Caldwell.

"Of course. I'll let General Landry know what happened and he can inform Hammond and O'Neill."

"Thank you, sir."


	64. Chapter 64

"It HAS been nearly two years! Do you intend to remain alone for the rest of your life?"

Logan looked over at Lyta. The woman meant well. She, too, had lost a husband before, so she did know and understand where Logan was coming from. Granted, she hadn't known her husband as long as Logan had known Sheppard, but she knew loss. She also knew that a new life, and a new love was possible. At least it had been for her, Caldwell and Daniel. All of them had lost a spouse and went on to find happiness with someone new. That didn't mean it could happen for her, nor that she WANTED to find someone new.

"I appreciate your concern, Lyta, I really do. I'm just not interested in moving on... that way."

"Perhaps one day."

"John is a very tough act to follow," Logan sighed. "But you don't have to worry about me."

She looked over at her children, who were playing with Ryan, Matt, Sam , Riley and Mitchell. She laughed as the children tackled Mitchell and then began piling on top of him. He was enjoying this immensely, she knew. It was a nice diversion for him, after a hard days work. He heard her laughing, which was music to his ears, and looked helplessly over at her.

"Little help here?" he pleaded.

"I thought you had everything under control!" she teased.

"That was til the little rugrats started piling on all over me!" he whined.

She decided to have mercy on him and called out to the children. "Who wants ice-cream?"

As one, the children peeled off Mitchell and came running over to her and Lyta. "Me!" they chimed together.

"Hey! What about ME?!" Mitchell called from the floor.

"I will take them, you help that one!" Lyta laughed, pointing at Mitchell.

Logan walked over and looked down at the seemingly helpless man lying on his back. "You call yourself a soldier?!" she teased.

"I was outnumbered!" he protested.

"Pathetic!" she turned to walk away.

Mitchell reached out and grabbed her foot, causing her to trip and go down. He was instantly upon her, tickling her sides mercilessly. "Pathetic, am I?" he growled teasingly.

"Yes!" she roared, unable to keep from laughing.

"Pathetic?! Who's pathetic NOW?!" he persisted.

"You are!" she cackled raucously.

"Who?!"

"You!"

"So stubborn... Well, we'll see how long you can take it!" he taunted as he easily flipped her onto her back and continued tickling her.

Logan laughed so hard she could barely catch her breath, but she still didn't give in. After a while, an exhausted and defeated Mitchell finally relented. "Damn woman! I've never known anyone so stubborn and determined in my life!" he breathed.

"Come on, _Shaft_ ," she teased. "You've always known that about me!" she laughed.

His eyes locked on hers and he nodded slowly. "Yeah... I guess I have."

"I thought you wanted ice cream," she said, clearing her throat.

"Yep," he replied, rolling off of her and reaching down to help her up. "Logan?"

"Mmmmm?"

"It was really nice, hearing you laugh like that again," he said seriously.

"It felt good. Weird... but good," she admitted.

"I hope you do it more often," he smiled happily.

"Well, I won't have much choice if you keep tickling me like that, will I?"

"I'm gonna have to remember that," he chuckled.

TWO MONTHS LATER

Logan stood in the doorway and watched silently for a while. After a few moments, McKay turned around to find her watching him.

"Hey!" he called out in greeting. "What brings you to my lab?"

"I heard you were conducting human experiments down here, so I've come to thwart your evil machinations," she teased.

"Har, har!" he chuckled good-naturedly. "What REALLY brings you down here?"

"Can't an old friend just pop by and visit?" she asked.

"No offense, dear, but you tend to have an almost allergic reaction to the... What did you call it? Doldrums of science?"

"Yes, Rodney, but I love YOU!" she chirped, walking over to plant a kiss on his cheek.

"Same here," he replied, somewhat flustered by her uncharacteristically cheerful demeanor. "How are the kids? Been meaning to drop by and visit with them."

"They're fine, growing like weeds and they miss you," she scolded him.

"I'll make a point of it, then."

"Speaking of missing you..." she trailed off with a deep breath.

"Yes?"

"Rodney, why have you shut yourself up in this dank, musty old laboratory?" she asked.

He looked around indignantly. "My lab is neither dank nor musty, thank you, and as for why I'm working here? I AM a scientist, you know!"

"I know... And I'm sure it's all very fascinating stuff," she taunted.

"Stuff? Science is not STUFF! What the..." he trailed off as it dawned on him that she was trying to get a rise out of him.

"Ah... I see... Having a little fun with the geek, are we?" he nodded.

"Just a little. You were actually more fun when you were part of a field unit..." she trailed off meaningfully.

"Oh. Yes. Well... I'm not... anymore..." he stammered.

"I realize it's taken me far too long to come down here and speak with you about this, but... Why, Rodney? Why did you hang up the space boots?" she asked, clearly troubled.

"I... just... I'm needed here... more... than out there," he stammered, clearly uncomfortable.

"Not true," she countered. "Please... tell me?"

He looked away, a pained expression on his face. "It's just...not...the same...I guess."

"Nothing is," she nodded. "I know you miss him, not that you'd freely admit it, but you and I both know that John wouldn't want this (indicating the lab) for you. You became a field man, Rodney. You were invaluable to him, didn't you know that?"

He looked stunned for a moment. "I suppose..."

"He'd hate it, knowing that you had locked yourself away down here, instead of being out there on the front lines."

He shrugged. "What about Teyla? She's not out there either!"

"Not yet, but then she had a little better excuse than you do. She took time off to be with her kids. She'll be going back out there very soon. What about you?" she prodded.

"I don't think... You know I don't work well with others!" he yelped.

"Mmmmm... Sometimes. But since when has that ever bothered you?"

"Well... Never, but it's different now."

"I think we've already established that," she nodded.

"I... I'm in the middle of some very important experiments."

"That most people on your science team can handle. What happened to John... Rodney, it wasn't your fault. It was Gere's."

"Yes, well, I still feel like... We...*I* should have known. I should have been more alert," he admitted sadly.

"For what it's worth, if that rope hadn't snapped, I don't think Gere would have had the balls to do what he did. He was handed the means to do what he'd wanted to do for a long time, and it made committing murder easy for him. There was no way to protect John from that sort of freak occurance. None of you could have saved him, but I _know_ you tried." She had been meaning to tell him that for some time.

McKay stood silent for a moment, then took her in his arms and hugged her tightly. "I do miss him," he admitted.

"Me, too. I always will. But, you and I both know he wouldn't want you to be anything less than who and what you are. Please Rodney, go back out there. Honor him by doing the work that you both loved. Mike needs you just as much as John did."

"I'll consider it... I'll talk to Sam and... We'll see."

"Fair enough," she smiled warmly at him.

"Now, what about _you_?" he eyed her speculatively.

"What _about_ me?" she blinked.

"When are you going to start... I don't know... opening yourself up to new... experiences?" he asked, turning the tables on her.

"Is that your roundabout way of asking me if I'm ready to *date* again?" she asked suspiciously.

"Sort of," he admitted sheepishly. It had been a long time.

"Rodney..."

"I hear there are a number of eligible bachelors circling your vicinity, just waiting for an opportunity to..."

"Not gonna happen!" she laughed.

"You know John wouldn't want you to be alone," he scolded.

"I'm not alone. I have two beautiful children and some very wonderful friends." What she knew and they didn't, was that while Sheppard would hate the thought of her being alone, he would also hate the thought of another man laying one finger on her, let alone anything else. Just as she would if their positions were reversed.

"Yes... but what about YOU?" he prodded.

"Again... What _about_ me?" she countered.

"Logan, you're a young, vibrant woman. You and John were very... _passionate_... people... And people have...needs..."

"Rodney!" she laughed nervously.

"I'm just saying, is all... John wouldn't want you to be alone..." he repeated himself.

"Well, I appreciate your concern, but... Let's just say John is a tough act to follow, and I wouldn't put anyone in the position of trying to fill his um, rather sizable... shoes..." she winked at him. "It wouldn't be fair."

"Okay... But sooner or later..." he trailed off.

"Let's just leave it at that, okay?"

He smiled and nodded. "Okay."

"And make sure you come see the kids?"

"I promise," he assured her.

"And talk to Caldwell about going back out there!" she prodded. "I meant what I said - Mike needs you."

"We'll see!"

Gere. Logan shook her head as she walked down the hall away from McKay's lab. She hadn't given him a moment's thought in months. She hadn't seen or spoken to him, in fact, since he'd attacked her and revealed how he had murdered Sheppard in cold blood - all in the name of his demented notion of love. He had been incarcerated since that day - first in the Atlantis brig and then the secure prison facility on Earth at Area 51. The Tollans hadn't been happy about it - thinking they were better equipped to mete out punishment for his crimes - but they had finally agreed. She had faced him just the one time. The morning after his attack on her. He had begged and pleaded for her to understand and accept his love. She had fixed a steely-cold glare at him and told him in no uncertain terms to take his idea of love and to go to hell - after rotting in prison for the rest of his natural life. Then she had turned on her heel, ignoring his hysterical screaming, walked out and never looked back. Death would have been too easy for him. It would have allowed him to escape a lifetime of torment that he so richly deserved.

TWO MONTHS LATER

"No!" Chelsea cried defiantly. "I want Uncle Cammern!"

Logan held the child on her lap, alternately trying to comfort her and find out why all of a sudden she was afraid to go to sleep. She was becoming increasingly upset and Logan had been unable to calm her down.

"Honey, Uncle Cameron's not here right now, he's in Genoa," she explained patiently.

"Don't care... _Want_ him..." she cried.

Logan sighed deeply, at the end of her rope, and keyed her mic. "Airman Kestler?" she called.

"Yes ma'am?" he replied immediately.

"Could you please dial Genoa and ask Colonel Mitchell to come over?" she asked, sounding as weary as she felt.

"Yes ma'am, right away."

She looked down at her daughter's tear stained face and smiled. "Okay sweet-pea, you heard Mommy, right? Uncle Cameron will be here soon."

Chelsea nodded but did not speak, then buried her face in the curve between Logan's neck and shoulder.

"I wish you'd tell me what's wrong."

"Want Uncle Cammern," she repeated.

Ten minutes later, Mitchell arrived at her door, breathless and frightened. "What's wrong?" he asked, looking around as he burst inside.

"Ask _her_!" she said, placing the squirming girl in his arms.

"Uncle Cammern..." she cried, bursting into fresh tears.

Mitchell melted as she wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist - clinging to him like a spider-monkey. "What's wrong baby-doll?" he asked softly, rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head.

"Want you," she sniffled, trembling in his arms.

"Okay... I'm here... Everything's gonna be okay, but you gotta tell me what's wrong."

"Scared!"

He looked at Logan, who shrugged helplessly. "Of what? You know your Mama would never let anything happen to you."

She refused to speak or to let go of him, and she cried for Logan when she left the room to check on the miraculously still sleeping Nicolas. Mitchell looked at her questioningly again but all she could do was shrug and throw up her hands.

"She won't tell me either," she said.

"Well then... What say we just have a seat here, all of us together, and wait til Miss Chelsea feels like talking?" he suggested.

They all crowded together on the small sofa, Chelsea on Mitchell's lap with her face buried against his chest, and Logan curled up next to them.

"All comfy?" he asked.

"Yep," Logan replied.

"Yep," Chelsea sniffled.

"Okay then... What shall we do?" he asked.

"Movie?" Logan asked.

" ** _NO_**!" Chelsea cried, burrowing further into Mitchell's embrace, her whole body trembling even more.

"Ah..." he arched an eyebrow at Logan. "I think we're getting somewhere."

Logan looked at him quizzically. "Children's movies shouldn't scare her like this."

"Is that all you have here?" he asked.

"Yeah."

"Chelsea, honey, you didn't sneak any movies you shouldn't have, did you? From one of your friends maybe?" he asked.

Chelsea wouldn't look up and meet his eyes.

"Chelsea, Uncle Cameron asked you a question," Logan prodded her.

She finally looked up at him, guilt written all over her face. "I didn't sneak it..." she replied evasively.

"What _did_ you do?" he asked mildly, no hint of reproach in his tone.

"The boys... I heard them talkin bout... ghosts... How dead peoples are ghosts, and since Daddy's dead... I wanted to see him, so I sneaked in when they were watchin, but..." she began to cry all over again.

It tore their hearts out as they realized what she must have been thinking and how terrified she must be at the thought of her father being some cliche ghost monster now.

"Chelsea, sweetie... Those things aren't real... And your father is not a ghost," he murmured to her comfortingly.

"A spirit creature," she sniffled.

"Not like in those stupid movies, sweetie, I promise. Your dad could never turn into anything that would ever hurt or scare you. Your dad is a good and protective kind of spirit, like an angel, that watches over you, your brother and your Mama."

"Not scary?" she asked, her bottom lip trembling.

"Never," he promised.

"Never," Logan agreed, fighting back her own tears. "Your father loved you and your brother more than anything, and he will always be with you, in your heart and in your memories..."

"And in your Mama, too," Mitchell added.

"Miss Daddy," she sniffled.

"I do, too," Logan assured her.

"So do I," Mitchell said.

"Uncle Cammern stay here tonite?" she asked.

Mitchell looked over at Logan, who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. She looked back at him questioningly.

"I don't have anywhere else to be," he whispered.

"I... uh... Okay... But you do have to go to bed, Miss. No arguments!"

"Kay... Uncle Cammern put me to bed?" she asked.

"You bet, sweet-pea!" he stood up and threw her over his shoulder to carry her to the bedroom.

"And don't wake up your brother!" Logan called out.

Twenty minutes later, Mitchell joined Logan out on the balcony and followed her gaze out to sea.

"Thanks... For dropping everything to come running," she murmured, handing him the bottle of Irish Whiskey she'd been drinking from.

"There was nothing to drop, Logan," he told her, noting that she was already well on her way to becoming drunk and he was quite inclined to join her. What Chelsea had told them about Sheppard - how she was afraid he'd turned into one of those monsters from the movie she'd seen - it had shaken him to the core. It had also re-opened a wound that still hadn't healed. Clearly it had done so for Logan too.

"Nothing and no ONE?" she teased, trying to lighten the mood.

"Nope," he shook his head and downed a few more gulps.

"I find that very hard to believe," she sighed, taking the bottle from him and taking a healthy swig.

"Do you?" he arched an eyebrow at her while taking back the bottle.

"Mmmm-hmmm..." she murmured.

"Well, _believe_ it cupcake!" he teased, feeling the whiskey start to kick in.

"CUPCAKE?! You're calling ME a cupcake?!" she glared at him in mock outrage.

"Sorry, I meant SWEET-cakes... I think..." he ammended.

"You know, that's really not much better..." she trailed off and took another drink.

"Still hurts, doesn't it?" he murmured after an uncomfortable moment or three of silence.

She knew exactly what he was talking about. Chelsea's words had rocked her to the core. It _had_ been a long time. Over two years, in fact, but despite whatever progress she made toward healing, there were times when she could be completely ripped open at the heart and feel the loss just as keenly as when it was new. The void left by his passing was still there. Still huge. It was agony. She still ached for his loving touch. **_John's touch_**. She WAS lonely, too, very lonely, despite what she'd said to McKay and anyone else who tried to broach the subject with her, but she didn't want another man. It hurt less when Mitchell was around. But dear God, she still missed Sheppard so much. There were times when she could swear that she felt him nearby, but then she would turn and find him gone and the pain would wash over her anew. She took the bottle from Mitchell's hand, tipped it back and downed several more swallows. She would never get over him. Never stop missing him. Never stop wanting him. Never stop needing him.

TWO MONTHS LATER

She had been making progress the last two years, coming out of her grief little by little, allowing herself to trust people again and being able to laugh. And then she'd taken a turn for the worse once more. Closing herself off, retreating behind those iron walls of hers. She would brush off anyone's concern and blithely go on her way, stubbornly refusing to discuss anything other than work or her kids. Even Mitchell couldn't get through to her and she actually trusted him more than anyone. She hadn't been eating. Hadn't been sleeping well. She was running herself ragged and now she was ill. So much so that Caldwell had found her lying unconscious on the floor outside the transporter near her quarters. He had scooped her up and run to the infirmary.

THIRTY MINUTES LATER

Caldwell paced outside her private infirmary room as Beckett sat, rocking an inconsolably sobbing Logan. He hadn't thought it possible, but she'd shut down even more when Beckett had returned to discuss her test results. She had let out a heart-rending wail and now was on the verge of hyperventilating, so fierce was her sobbing. Mitchell came barreling down the hallway, his face stricken and fearful.

"What happened?" he asked, freezing in place as he heard Logan's sobs. "My God, what _happened_?!"

Upon hearing his voice out in the hallway, Logan's sobbing intensified and Mitchell burst into the room, prepared to do battle with anyone who had hurt her.

"Not a good time, lad," a shaken Beckett told him, his eyes straying to Caldwell behind him in silent pleading for help.

Caldwell took hold of Mitchell's arm. "Come on Mitchell."

"Logan?" Mitchell tried approaching her, only to freeze in place when she shrank back and turned away.

"Go on now, lad... I've got her," Beckett told him, cradling her in his arms. "And General?"

"Yes?"

"Could you send for Dr. Fraser, please?" Beckett asked. Logan hadn't _asked_ for her, but he knew she _needed_ her right now.

Both Mitchell and Caldwell froze again, fearful that whatever was wrong with her was too much for him to handle alone.

"Please," Beckett prodded.

TWO HOURS LATER

Fraser closed the door and stood there for a moment, taking a deep breath. She found Mitchell and Caldwell at the end of the hall, both of them coming to their feet as soon as they saw her.

"Cameron, you can go in now," she told him. "She's asking for you."

Mitchell wasted no time and practically sprinted to her room. Caldwell eyed Fraser, concern etched all over his face. "Doctor?"

Fraser took Caldwell by the arm and walked him over to a secluded corner. "I know you're worried, Steven," she began.

"Just tell me she's okay?!" he pleaded with her.

"She asked me talk to you. She's not up to facing you herself, which is silly, if you ask me, but anyway..."


	65. Chapter 65

"Say again?" a stunned Mitchell stared at Logan. She was still pale, save for the twin patches of deep pink staining her cheeks.

"Pretty sure you heard me the first time," she murmured.

He was reeling. His heart was racing as his mind went back to that night. The pain. The booze. Logan. Finding solace in each other - for just a little while. Bliss... and then crushing reality. They had made love and then fallen asleep (or to be more precise: passed out) wrapped in each other's arms. He'd awoken a few hours later, still fairly drunk, breathing in the scent of her hair, a smile on his face. She had stirred, ever so slightly and he tightened his arms around her. She let out a deep sigh and murmured a single word in her twilight state: "John."

That night had not been the beginning of something new and wonderful between them. It had effectively been the end. The end of his futile yearnings. The end of any hope for a future with her as anything other than a friend. A beloved friend, to be sure, but never more. He had finally accepted it. Even before she woke up, bleary-eyed and confused, then horrified at what they had done. She'd apologized profusely, tears streaming down her face. And apologized more. He'd tried not to take offense at the utter horror on her face, and it was easier to take when she'd gone on and on about how sorry she was to have taken advantage of him - not that he felt taken advantage of in the slightest, but that was the way she saw it. She swore that she'd never meant to use him. Never meant to hurt him. She swore it would never happen again and begged him to forgive her.

And then the wall went up. She didn't avoid him. Didn't ignore him. She wasn't short or mean or cold. She never blamed him for what they'd done. But she never allowed herself to be alone with him again. Ever. The children or other people were always present. Always. Until this moment.

"Pregnant..." he murmured.

He was astounded. Ecstatic, in fact. Not that he allowed it to show. She was clearly _not_ ecstatic. He supposed he understood that and tried not to let it hurt. They were in two different places after all, emotionally speaking. He'd come to accept that she would never love him the way he loved her, and had begun to let go of that dream. Now she was carrying his child.

"One time," he shook his head.

"You're a real one-hit wonder," she snuffled tearily.

"Who knew?" he quipped.

"I'm sorry," she murmured softly.

He looked her in the eye. "That you're pregnant?"

"That it doesn't change... anything," she told him. "That I continue to hurt you, no matter how much I... That I can't give you everything you deserve..."

"Logan," he held up a hand to stop her, then reached for hers and clasped it tightly in his own, refusing to let go even though she tried to pull away. "Everything happens for a reason. Now, I have no idea what the reason may be for this, and maybe neither of us will know for a long time, or ever, but I'm not _unhappy_ about it. I would have been tied to you for the rest of my life, regardless. You are my family. If nothing else, you're my family. You, Chels, Nic... John, in spite of the fact that he's gone. We're having a baby, as unplanned and unexpected as that is, and I can't be sorry about that."

She nodded. "You know it's not the fact that it's yours, right?"

It was his turn to nod. "I think so."

"I do love you, Cameron. I do. I love you _so_ much. You mean the world to me. To Chels and to Nic. I just... I'm..."

"Until death do us part never really applied to you and John, I know," he nodded. "He was _it_ for you."

Pain washed over her face and fresh tears slid down her face. "I hate how much that hurts you."

"I need for you to let that go," he told her.

"How can I?" she sniffed. "I can't stand that I have caused you so much pain and can't seem to do anything but..."

"Because I have," he murmured, cutting her off. "Yes, I will always love you. But I'm a big boy and I may have a thick head, but I _have_ come to accept that we will always be what we have always been. And that's _no_ small thing," he added quickly. "The circumstances may be less than ideal, but I love you and you love me, we're already family, that will never change, so life will just continue on. We'll have one more child to raise, it's just that this one will have _my_ blood... and hopefully my hair..."

She managed a chuckle at that. "Can we do this Cameron? The complications... The kids are going to be so confused. Can we really do this? "

"We can," he nodded. "Of course we can. The kids will take their cues from us, and no one else really matters."

SEVEN MONTHS LATER

Once again, those closest to Logan and Mitchell gathered in the waiting room within the infirmary and waited for news. McKay was pacing nervously, with Carter teasing him that HE looked more like the expectant father. Suddenly, the doors opened and a beaming Mitchell waved them over. Simmons led Nic and Chelsea over to Mitchell so they could see first.

"This..." he said holding up a bundle wrapped in a baby blue blanket. "Is your new baby brother, Scott..." he announced.

"A boy!" Weir squealed.

"Congratulations, Colonel!" Caldwell said, a huge smile on his face.

"And this..." he went back and wheeled a clear bassinet forward. "Is your baby sister, Cadence."

"TWINS?!" McKay gasped.

"You never told us!" Weir accused.

"Me either!" Simmons said.

"We wanted it to be a surprise," Mitchell shrugged, grinning from ear to ear.

"Mission accomplished!" Caldwell laughed.

"Pretty!" Chelsea said in awe.

"They tiny!" Nic pronounced.

"Yes they are, little man, so we have to be very careful with them," Mitchell reminded him.

"No wrestlin?" Nic asked, somewhat disappointed.

"No... You have your cousins for that," Simmons chuckled.

"Where's Mommy?" Chelsea asked.

"She's resting, right now, sweet-pea. She's very tired. But I promise, I'll take you to see her as soon as she wakes up."

"And me!" Nic chimed in.

"And you, sport!" Mitchell promised. "I better get these two back before the nurses come hunt me down," he said.

"I've never seen him so happy," Carter said after he'd left.

"Well, he's finally got _almost_ everything he ever wanted," Daniel pointed out.

"True," she admitted.

Mitchell brought the twins back to Logan's room and settled them together into one bassinet. When he was sure that they were still content and sleeping, he turned his attention to Logan, who was also still asleep. She'd been phenomenal throughout her labor, and subsequent C-Section, when Beckett determined that the babies just weren't going to come out the conventional route. He'd been just as awestruck when they pulled his son from her body as he'd been when he delivered Chelsea. Then, when his daughter was safely delivered, Mitchell knew _near_ -complete fulfillment. He didn't have the girl, but he had two unbelievably beautiful, healthy children with her. It was enough.

TWO DAYS LATER

Fraser finished examining the babies and gently placed them back on Logan's lap. She had already examined Logan, who was enduring the post-partum rush of hormones and emotions and had been tearful on and off for several hours now.

"They're both very healthy," Fraser assured her.

"Thank you," Logan sniffled.

"I have to say," Fraser smiled at her warmly. "You do make beautiful children."

"Thank you again," Logan smiled back before gazing down upon the twins.

They were beautiful. Tiny. Perfect. Beautiful. They both had Mitchell's amazing blue eyes. If only John were there to see them...

"Logan..."

"I keep... I know it's... They are..." she trailed off, unable to form a coherent sentence.

"Even now?" Fraser asked. "You don't think that you and Cameron can..."

Logan shook her head negatively. "You know I love him. I do. And I am grateful for these two beautiful children. But it was never... I mean... I told you, didn't I? What happened?"

"Sort of," Fraser nodded.

"I still don't really remember. How we ended up in bed. All I can remember is being on the verge of waking up and thinking John was beside me... I can't even... God, I was so mortified at myself."

"For being human? For needing comfort?" Fraser shook her head. "You're too hard on yourself."

"For using him like that," Logan corrected her. That was how she genuinely saw it. "Cameron deserves better. He always has. I should love him, Janet. I mean, I do, but it's..."

"Not like John," Fraser finished for her.

"He's _it_ for me, Janet. I get that some people are lucky to find love again after a death or divorce, but..." she paused to take a deep breath. "John was it. My one and only. And I can say that with some authority because I had known love before. Daniel was..."

"I remember," Fraser nodded.

"No one could ever live up to John - who and what he was. Ever. And it would be grotesquely unfair for me to ever allow anyone - especially Cameron - to try. To play second best? I love him too much to do that to him. Not that I could do it to anyone else, I mean, but never to Cam."

"So, you both just go on like you have for the last seven months? Parent together, but nothing more?"

Logan nodded. "Life goes on. I've accepted that for the sake of my kids. I had my shot at true love, and it was amazing. Now I have to find a way to come to terms with the fact that these two... they won't know... " she couldn't finish that thought. Couldn't bring herself to voice or even breathe the words into existence that they would never, none of them, see John Sheppard again. Even after all this time, she just couldn't quite fully accept it. She probably never would.

THREE MONTHS LATER - UNKNOWN PLANET

Busek stared down the much bigger and stronger man before him. "You treat her badly," he sneered.

"I won't argue that," Adahm admitted.

"She deserves better," Busek said coldly.

"I won't argue that either."

"Then why do you treat her thus?" he demanded.

"I wish I knew, Busek. I really do." He had a theory, but it was nothing he could explain to the man standing before him.

Busek deflated somewhat when he saw that Adahm was as mystified as he was. The man seemed genuinely regretful about his treatment of his wife. He was not abusive in any way, of course, but it was clear that he did not love Yehra anywhere near as deeply as she loved him. He did seem to care about her, true, and that was at least SOMETHING. In all truthfulness, he supposed he could not really fault the man, especially given what Yehra had told him. Adahm had not really been given the chance to fall in love with Yehra for himself. Yehra had told him that they were mated almost immediately upon his waking, and she had never looked back.

She had also never considered the consequences of her actions either. Yes, she had the child she had longed for all these years, but not the life she'd longed for. She'd accomplished what she'd set out to do, take Adahm for her mate, but it had not given her what she truly wanted. His heart. Though he knew what Adahm's reaction would surely be, he felt Yehra had little choice but to tell him the whole truth. To restore, fully, that which she had taken out of mercy. She was losing him anyway.

As often happened over the years, he thought back to that day, years before, when he'd seen that sad, beautiful woman crying near the place where intruders and a foul murder had driven them from their home on that planet. Perhaps she was the reason Adahm had never been able to give his heart to Yehra, who more than deserved it. Perhaps SHE had been mated to him first? And perhaps Adahm's heart remembered her, where his mind did not. Looking back over the years, he thought that was as plausible an explanation as anything else.

"Where did you just go?" Adahm asked, watching him intently.

"Just thinking," Busek brushed off the question.

"About?" he prodded.

"About a time before... Before you couldn't remember," he fudged.

"Anything I should know?"

"Perhaps. But it is something only Yehra can tell you."

Adahm looked at him, clearly annoyed. "You know she won't. She never discusses the past with me," he said.

That was something he'd always found extremely disconcerting. She would brush off his questions by saying that nothing in the past mattered as long as they still had each other. But he'd been growing more and more uneasy about her steadfast refusal to discuss his past with him. It was almost, he felt sometimes, as if she didn't really know as much about his past as she'd claimed.

"I believe it is time you forced the issue with her," he admitted reluctantly.

"Why?" Adahm asked curiously.

"For her own good. And for the good of your family, as well as your own peace of mind."

"Busek! What have you done?!" Yehra demanded angrily. Neither of them had heard her approach them from behind.

"What you should have done long ago... Yehra, you must tell him!"

"NO!"

"You MUST. I will stand beside you, whatever the outcome, but you cannot continue on like this. It is not fair to either of you."

"Can I be part of this conversation?" Adahm asked irritably.

"It is not important, husband..." Yehra said shakily.

"I beg to differ, WIFE, and it's high time I had some answers!" he demanded angrily.

"Why?! What is it you wish to know?" she cried.

"For starters I'd like to know, REALLY, why I have no memory of my past."

Yehra drew herself up angrily. "Very well, please sit down."

"I don't want to..."

"Please Adahm, it will be best for you," Busek interceded.

Adahm sat, cross-legged on the ground and Yehra came to stand behind him. She reached out and touched the top of his head. Concentrating hard, she found the thread she sought and gave it a mental tug. Instantly, Adahm's mind flashed on a man's face he did not recognize, staring malevolently at him as he held on to some protruding tree roots on a cliff wall, far above the ground. He was in pain... his arm and his shoulder felt like they were on fire. An instant later, he was falling and all he could see was an image of the most beautiful, golden haired woman he could possibly imagine, then there was darkness. As Yehra released him, he gasped at the intensity of the memory.

"That... what the hell was that?!" he asked, still feeling the pain he'd experienced in that memory.

"THAT is why you don't remember!" Yehra screamed at him. "Do you think I wanted you to have to live with THAT?!"

"I was... dead?" he asked incredulously.

"Murdered!" she confirmed.

"Okay... then how is it I'm still walking around?" he asked.

"Yehra possesses the gift," Busek explained.

"The gift?"

"The gift of healing. She brought you back, even from death, so strong is her love for you."

Adahm looked at Yehra's tear-streaked face. "Thank you," he said.

"I did what I did out of love," she cried.

"I get that... But..."

"No one should have to live with the memory of what they did to you."

"They?" he blinked at her, confused. "And who were _they_? Why did they try to... kill me?" he asked.

"That is not important!" she cried. "They are gone now, and you will never have to worry about them again."

"I have a right to know!" Adahm countered.

"Why? Why do you even wish to remember such pain?" she shouted.

"Because it's MY pain, Yehra. MINE. You took my memories to spare me that pain, and I understand why you did it, but I need to remember now, or I will never be happy."

"No!" she cried and ran off.

"Yehra!" he called out to her.

The sound of his son's crying stopped him from going after her. He turned around to find the boy standing in the clearing looking up at him. "Dada?" he cried. Adahm scooped him up and carried him back to their home. He did his best to calm the boy's fears and assured him that his mother would return shortly.

She did return, though many hours later, after Adahm and their son had fallen asleep. She tiptoed in and took the sleeping boy from his father's arms and laid him on the pallet in his room. When she returned, she found Adahm tossing fitfully in his sleep. He was murmuring something inaudible in his sleep, and it sent a cold stab of fear through her heart. Especially when he called out " _Logan_!" in his sleep. It wasn't the first time.

ATLANTIS

Logan shot bolt upright in her bed, instantly awake and gasping for breath. She looked around the darkened room, though she found nothing amiss. Mitchell, Nic and Chelsea were still out, and the twins were sleeping peacefully in their cribs. She'd opted for a nap, rather than dinner in the mess, but she didn't feel like she'd been asleep for very long. She'd been dreaming about John again. It had been happening more and more frequently the past few weeks. She was sure it was because she'd been thinking about him, the third 'anniversary' of his death was a week past, and her thoughts usually drifted to him more often than usual when that date approached.

It wasn't that she wasn't reasonably content with her new life. It was odd, though. She'd thought that she'd felt his presence, or spirit, many times over the past three years, but it felt particularly strong now. She could swear she'd heard him call out to her. Rather than comforting her, she felt almost a sense of foreboding about it. Something was wrong. Maybe, she thought, he was trying to warn her about something to come?

KR5-118

Adahm walked around for a while after they arrived, trying to find a familiar landmark. His memories were coming back, bit by bit, but they were a jumbled mess. Images of people flashed with lightning speed, but he could not give names to any of them, with one exception. The woman, whose image made his heart stop, her name was Logan. He didn't know how he knew it, for sure, but he loved her, with his entire being. Who was she? How had he ended up with Yehra?

As he reached the edge of the cliff, his memories became more vivid. He looked down, and were it not for the heavy mist, he knew precisely where he would find the protruding tree roots he'd been shaken from by the man with the wild eyes. What had he said?

" _Logan deserves better than you_ "

Something like that. So he had tried to kill him...Well, technically succeeded in killing him, over the woman called Logan. Picturing her beautiful face, he understood how the man could be driven to madness over her. Feeling the overwhelming love for her that he felt, but did not understand, he could certainly understand it.

As soon as he could picture the symbols in his mind, he had come here, stopping only long enough to write a quick note to Yehra and grab his son. He was not so cruel that he would take her son and disappear without any hint as to what he was doing. But, he had to have some answers, and she wasn't about to tell him the truth. Now some new symbols were popping into his mind as he focused on the mental image of Logan's face.

"Home?" he murmured. "Is that where I'll find her?"

"Mama?" the boy asked.

Adahm looked down at him. "I don't think so, cadet." She should have been though.

He had yet to remember if Adahm was truly his name, but he went anyway. He quickly made his way back to the ring and began punching in the symbols.

ATLANTIS

"Colonel Devane to the control room," came Kestler's voice over the city-wide.

"On my way," she replied absently.

As expected, Rylin was already heading down the hall when she opened the door. "They're still sleeping, and the Colonel has Chels and Nic in Genoa!" she called out as she raced down the hall.

UNKNOWN PLANET

"No, I am sorry, but I do not recall ever hearing anyone speak of a 'Lohgahn' before," Busek told her.

She had risen before Adahm woke up and stole out of their home before he could have the chance to try and persuade her to restore his full memory.

"You gave him only the memory immediately prior to his death?"

"Yes. It was but a few moments, just to show him there was no reason for him to..." she trailed off.

She knew she was only kidding herself. Rather than dissuading him from pursuing the matter, as she'd thought the horror of that memory would, it had served only to make him more determined.

"Perhaps this Lohgahn is the one who pushed him from the cliff?" Busek ventured.

"I do not think so," she admitted grudgingly. In fact, she _knew_ so. Would that it had been. "His voice was not one of fear or panic when he said it," she added fearfully.

She had never told Busek the whole truth - though he was her closest friend. He never would have allowed her to do what she'd done. Never. And she simply couldn't have risked it.

"Then perhaps this Lohgahn was the woman I told you about. The one I saw crying at the river's edge. The one who left wildflowers there," Busek said

"You believe her to be his..." she couldn't finish her sentence.

"Mate? Yes, I believe it is possible. It would certainly explain much."

"What have I done, Busek?" she cried, knowing full well everything she had done. Yes, she'd known all too well what she was doing, and she hadn't cared.

"What you did, you did not do out of malice."

"No, but I suspected, as you did, that the woman you told me about could be someone special... to him. I did not want to accept it, because I loved him."

"And now you are paying the price for your actions, no matter how well intentioned."

"I truly believed that they would try to kill him again, if he went back to them." Another lie.

"I know, as did I."

"I will lose him, Busek. I cannot lose him!" she cried out of sheer panic.

"You have his son, Yehra. You will never lose him completely..."

They were interrupted by people shouting outside. "Yehra! Yehra!"

Yehra and Busek ran outside to see what the commotion was about. A young hunter came running up to them.

"Why did he go?" Filar asked anxiously.

"Who?" asked Busek.

"Adahm. He went through the ring with your son!"

Yehra gasped in surprise. In all the times he had gone off before, he had never gone through the ring.

"Did you see the symbols?" Busek asked.

"Yes..." he drew them out with a stick in the dirt and Yehra gasped again. She turned around and went back into Busek's home.

"Do not trouble yourself about it, Filar. Adahm will return." When he went back inside, he found Yehra crying softly in the corner.

"He has gone back to where it began," she cried.

"How could he? How could he know those symbols?" Busek asked.

"I do not know. Perhaps I let out more of his memory than I intended to..."


	66. Chapter 66

"That's the fourth time someone has dialed in but we're not getting an IDC or radio transmission and nothing has impacted the shield," Kestler informed her.

He knew what her next question would be and he was really dreading it.

"Do you know where they're dialing from?" she asked, as expected.

"Yes ma'am," he hesitated.

She gave him an odd look. "Annnnnd?" she prodded.

She couldn't say why, but she found that she wasn't really surprised when he told her. Caldwell and Weir were both on Earth at the moment, and with Mitchell in Genoa she was the ranking military officer in Atlantis right now. Perfect! "Are you sure?" she asked.

"Yes, ma'am."

The gate shut down and Logan immediately had Kestler dial back, hoping to connect before the person or persons on the other side dialed Atlantis again. It took a few tries, but they were finally able to make a connection.

"Call Lorne and let him know what's going on," she ordered. "And get Bates up to speed too." She ran down the stairs as soon as the wormhole engaged and grabbed a P-90, a zat and a tactical vest.

"Ma'am! Don't you think you should..."

She stopped and turned to look up at him. "I'll be fine, Airman. Just follow my orders!" she said and stepped through the event horizon.

What she found, when she stepped through on the other side, was enough to shake her to the very core.

ONE HOUR LATER

After conducting a thorough search of the planet, Mitchell dialed Atlantis to report in. "Kestler, are you sure this is where she came?"

"Yes sir," came his reply.

"Well she's not here now! No one is!" he snapped.

"We'll find her, Cam," Carter assured him.

"What the hell was she _thinking_?" he shook his head.

That was a rhetorical question, of course. He knew what she was likely thinking when she learned that someone on THIS planet was trying to reach Atlantis. The same thing he thought upon hearing the news. John Sheppard. At least that was the first thought that popped into his head. Not that Sheppard was alive or anything, but that it had _something_ to do with him. Even if he hadn't come to that conclusion on his own, the reaction of Chelsea and Nic would have been enough to convince him. Both of them had been chattering away, in the middle of their meal when all of a sudden, they let out a gasp of shock, dropped their forks and went deathly pale. He saw Chelsea mouth the word, "Daddy" before immediately bursting into tears. Nic quickly followed suit and both children launched themselves into his arms. The call from Atlantis came in a few minutes later. Lorne telling him that Logan had gone to investigate something on the last planet she should ever set foot on again. It had taken him some time to calm the children enough to explain that he was going to go find their mother and figure out what had happened. Then he'd left them in Fraser's capable hands and returned to Atlantis.

UNKNOWN PLANET

Yehra stood over the sleeping pallet and studied the woman's face. She was indeed quite beautiful. Very soon, Busek joined her.

"This is the woman you saw before?" she asked.

"Indeed."

"She _is_ quite lovely," Yehra admitted grudgingly.

"Quite... Yehra, what are you planning to do?" he asked suspiciously.

"What makes you think I am planning anything?" she replied.

"The look in your eyes, for one thing." He knew her all too well.

"Where is Adahm?" she asked, ignoring his question.

"He is secured in your home, as you asked. He has been given the draught you made, but he remains quite agitated. He has been calling out for her since we brought them back."

"How would she know to find him there?" she asked.

"I do not know, but it was apparent that she did not expect to see him."

"It was when she first saw him that she fainted?" she winced.

"Yes. The color drained from her face and I heard her say something, then she fainted."

"What did she say?"

"She called him... _Jahnn_ , I believe. She was very surprised to see him. Adahm immediately tried to go to her, he fought rather fiercely, in fact. He seemed quite concerned that we might hurt her," he looked at Yehra again. "A baseless fear, I am sure?"

"You are afraid that I might hurt her?" Yehra asked incredulously.

"It pains me to say that I am unsure WHAT you will do. It is clear that this woman is Adahm's true mate, regardless of what you or I might wish."

"Mmmm..." she murmured non-committally.

Suddenly the woman cried out and then sat upright, looking around in confusion. "John?!" she called.

Busek motioned Yehra out of the room and he slowly approached the woman. "Greetings," he said in a friendly tone.

"Where am I?" she asked warily.

"You are in my home. You were brought here when my people found you unconscious," he explained.

"Unconscious..." she looked around. "What happened?"

"I am... unsure..." he replied.

"Where are my things?" she asked.

"They are in the other room, nothing has been touched."

"I need to contact my people."

"I am afraid that is not possible. Not right now."

"Oh? And why is that?" she asked suspiciously, still trying to get her bearings.

"You came to our world, armed for battle... I am afraid our elders will want to speak with you regarding your intentions."

"For defense, more than for battle," she corrected him. "So, I'm a prisoner?"

"More of a guest, I would say, than a prisoner."

"But you won't let me leave or contact my people."

"Not yet. I am sure this will be allowed in due time. You keep looking around... I'm sorry, how are you called?"

"Logan Sheppard," she replied.

"What is it you are looking for, Logan Sheppard?" he asked.

"I just... For a moment, when I came through the stargate, I thought I saw... someone..."

"Several someones, actually," he informed her.

"No... I mean someone that I lost. Are you... Is everyone alright here? You're not in some kind of danger? The Wraith maybe?"

"We are safe here, though the Wraith have made it necessary to move around quite often."

"I see..."

"Why do you ask?" he stared at her, clearly puzzled by her concern.

"I guess it has something to do with that someone I told you about... I had a feeling he was trying to warn me about something... I guess that sounds pretty silly, huh?"

"Not at all. This someone you speak of... He is..."

"Dead. He was killed three years ago," she said sadly, pain etched upon her face. It was evident (to him) that she didn't fully believe that to be the case - that she had never really accepted his loss.

"In battle with the Wraith?" he asked, knowing the answer already.

"No. Actually, he was murdered by a man who... Well, let's just say that he wanted what his rival had."

"You?" he asked, his heart sinking for Yehra.

"Yes."

"Did he succeed in his quest?"

"NO! No, never!" she replied vehemently. "I'm not really sure why I'm even telling you this, me being a prisoner and all."

"You were shaken by... what you believe you saw."

"That's one word for it," she smiled.

"This someone of yours, does he have a name?"

"John. His name is John Sheppard."

"He was... your... mate?" Busek prodded.

"Yes."

"I am sorry. It must have been heart-breaking for you, to lose him in such a way."

"To lose him at all. It's been hard on our children as well."

At the mention of her children, he gasped in horrified reaction. "Children?"

"Yes. He left behind a son and a daughter who worshipped the ground he walked on."

"That is...horrible..." he said sincerely.

Logan hadn't missed the change in his demeanor, but she wasn't sure what to make of it.

"Please," he began backing toward the door. "You must rest and recover. I will send for you when the elders have gathered. There is tea on the table next to you, if you like."

"Thank you," she murmured, watching him go.

If she didn't know any better, she'd say his reaction was one of regret, or even guilt. She went over and smelled the tea, pouring herself a cup. It smelled wonderful and tasted even better. She had two cups before she began to feel very sleepy. The tea! She realized it too late. There was something in the tea that had a sedative effect. Damn! How could she be so far off her game?!

LATER

He waited until the last of them had gone from the room. He'd known Yehra would have one of her special draughts given to him, but he also knew how to counteract it. He'd let them believe he'd succumbed to the effects of the sedative so they would leave and he could use the counteractive draught hidden in the cupboard. He took a few swallows and began to feel a bit more lucid. He dared not wait too long, knowing they would return to check on him.

He quietly made his way to the window and, after checking to make sure no one was around, he quickly climbed out and headed toward Busek's home. He'd seen them take Logan there before they dragged him back to the home he shared with Yehra. His stomach churned at the thought that they might have hurt her. He was still so confused, but he knew that Logan was his life, and he would do anything to get to her and keep her safe.

He checked all the windows, finding the one in the rear bedchamber open. He climbed inside and began looking around the darkened room. There, on the bed, he saw her. She appeared to be unconscious still, though he wasn't sure how that could be. People who fainted didn't generally remain unconscious for hours on end. A quick search of the room turned up a teapot and cup. The telltale smell told him that Yehra had prepared a draught for her, too.

He sat on the bed beside her and reached out to brush a strand of hair from her face. His heart turned over as he stared down at her beautiful face. He had to get her out of here and back to... Where? He couldn't remember the name of the place he had been entering the symbols for. He reached down and gently took her in his arms. Her hair smelled sweet and fresh, and holding her like this was so comfortable and familiar... and right.

"Logan," he whispered in her ear. "Logan," he repeated frantically, patting her face a little. He cursed himself for not thinking to bring some of the couteractive draught with him. "Logan!" he repeated again.

This time he was rewarded with a soft moan, but he also heard a noise coming from somewhere in the house. He lay her down again and went to check at the door, to see if anyone was coming. As he did so, Logan managed to open her eyes. Everything was blurry and the room was spinning. Her eyes were playing tricks on her again, she was sure. Because she was certain, even in her compromised condition, that it was John standing by the door, looking back at her.

"Logan?" he asked.

Her eyes flew open wider. That definitely sounded like his voice. She shook her head in an effort to clear her addled senses. "John..." she croaked.

He took a few steps toward her. "Logan...?" he trailed off as she gasped again.

"John?!" her voice quavered as she struggled to sit up.

"I...uh..." he didn't know what to say, so he just sat next to her on the bed again. He could see the confusion in her eyes. She had every reason to be confused. She likely thought he was dead. Still.

"Logan, do you know me?" he asked.

"John... Are you... REAL?" she whispered, unable to bring herself to reach out and touch him, lest he vanish like one of her dreams.

He reached down and took her hand in his, then placed it over his heart, so she could feel his heartbeat. "Feel real?" he asked.

"Johnny... My God...It's really YOU!" she cried, throwing her arms around him.

He pulled her onto his lap and held her tightly against him as she cried, tears streaming down his own face. THIS felt right. THIS was home. THIS was where he belonged. She pulled back for a moment to look into his eyes, her hands caressing his face, before her lips found his.

"Dada?" said a small voice.

Logan froze then tore her lips away from his and looked over his shoulder behind him. Even in the dim light, there was no mistaking who the child belonged to. She pulled away from him and crawled to the other side of the bed.

"Whozzat?" the boy asked.

Before either of them could answer him, the door burst open and several people came running inside. Yehra was not among them, but Busek was. He paled tremendously when he saw Logan and Adahm, or rather John Sheppard, together.

"Adahm... What are you..."

"Adahm?" Logan began. "His name is not Adahm."

"Please! Not in front of the boy!" he warned, looking pointedly at Sheppard, who nodded. "Take him to his mother," he told one of the others.

Logan cringed at the mention of the child's mother. As irrational as it was, she felt a sudden, intense anger and jealousy. She, too, looked questioningly at Sheppard, who clearly wanted nothing more than to have the floor open up and swallow him whole.

When most of the others had gone, she turned angry, accusing eyes on Busek. "You KNEW he was alive when you were questioning me!" she hissed.

"I was... not sure..." he stammered.

"You _knew_!" she shouted. "And you sat there, listening so sympathetically while I poured my heart out over my supposedly dead husband and father of my children!"

"Children?" Sheppard asked, clearly shaken. "Children..." he repeated, pain etched all over his face.

"Yes... What? You don't remember our children?" she gasped in horror.

"I... no... It FEELS right though..."

"FEELS right?" she asked.

"He remembers very little, Logan Sheppard, in fact until yesterday, he remembered nothing of his former life."

"I...see..." she shook her head, glancing at the lovely woman who stood next to Busek.

"Yes, John, we have two beautiful children together. A boy and a girl."

He grinned, inordinately happy about that, then he remembered the expression on her face when she realized that he had another son. A son not HERS.

"Logan... I..." he began, only to be interrupted by the door opening again.

A pretty, flame-haired woman walked in, pain in her eyes as she took in the sight of them together. "I understand we have much to discuss," she said.

"Yes," Sheppard said angrily. "Starting with explaining to my wife, my REAL wife, how it is that YOU claimed to be my wife instead."

Logan looked over at her, gasping in shock. "You?"

"What he says is true," she admitted.

"So I have YOU to thank for keeping my husband from me and my children all this time," Logan said through gritted teeth.

"Indeed," she admitted freely. "Although, I must say, when I healed him, I had no idea he was mated already, or that he had children." She was lying through her teeth and Logan knew it. The other woman knew it too - the one standing next to Busek. She hadn't said as much, and she couldn't say HOW she knew it, but she did. She let that go - for now - because of the other thing Yehra said.

"HEALED him? I saw his body at the bottom of the gorge... He was..." she couldn't bring herself to say it.

"So he was," Yehra said.

"And you were able to bring him back? To heal him?" she asked in awe.

"Yes. It is a gift that some of our people possess."

"Then I really _do_ have to thank you... For THAT. But, why did you take him away and hide him from us?"

"She thought they were protecting me," Sheppard answered.

"Protecting you? From..." her eyes widened. "From Gere?"

"Gere?" Sheppard asked.

"The man who... He was the one who..."

"Ah... Okay, I remember something about some guy with wild eyes, right before I fell."

"He pushed you," Logan told him.

"So I gathered," Sheppard winced. "Over you, right?" he winked.

"Believe me, John, he's paying for that and will for the rest of his life."

"Made his move, did he?" Something told him that Logan wouldn't want anything to do with a weasel like this Gere person.

"Something like that."

"Anyway... They were convinced that all of you were nothing but murderous rampagers, bent on destroying all life in the galaxy, or something," Sheppard went on to explain.

Logan listened as Yehra gave a (supposedly) full confession and filled in all the blanks for her. She admitted to falling in love with Sheppard at first sight, and thus wanting to keep him safe. She apologized for causing her such grief, (an apology lacking in any real conviction or honesty) but she made it clear that she still loved him and did not want to lose him. Logan could appreciate her candor in that regard, but not her methods.

"So, you have the power to restore life, so you must have the power to restore his memory, in full?" she eyed Yehra speculatively.

"Yes," Yehra replied. Though she clearly didn't want to.

"Do so, please." Logan arched an eyebrow at her.

"I..."

"There's no point in keeping him from remembering now. Would you want him to forget about YOUR son, the way you've made him forget our children?"

"No."

"He has a brother, too, nephews, and friends..." her voice trailed off as Mitchell popped into her mind. "It's not fair to keep all that from him."

Sheppard noticed the shadow cross her face for a moment and wondered what it was that had caused her such pain.

"Please, Yehra. Give him back what you had no right to take," the woman next to Busek said.

Yehra nodded and slowly stood up to move behind Sheppard. She placed both hands on his head and closed her eyes. After a moment, Sheppard cried out as his memories were suddenly restored all at once.

"John!" Logan cried out and moved to cradle his head in her lap.

After a few moments, Sheppard gasped and looked up into her eyes. "Chelsea? Nic?" he asked, tears streaming down his face.

"They're okay... A bit older now," she smiled.

"Mike and the boys?"

"All well and living in Genoa. He and Janet got married."

"Whoa! I've missed... so much..." he trailed off sadly.

"I will leave the two of you alone, for a _little while_ , to talk," Yehra said, excusing herself.


	67. Chapter 67

"God, baby... I'm so sorry..." he said, tears streaming down his handsome face as he took her in his arms.

"Not your fault, Flyboy," she told him, equally sad, clinging to him for dear life.

"Cam... I made him promise..." he pulled back and looked at her intently, noting how she flinched at the mention of his name.

"You made him promise to take care of your family," she reminded him, decidedly uncomfortable.

"Yeah... He..." he trailed off at the look in her eyes.

"You two... You and Cam?" he asked.

"You were gone a long time, John. But it's not like that," she shook her head.

"Uh-huh... How long did he wait to make his move?" his voice was tinged with anger and jealousy.

"I told you, it's not like that," she said.

"How _long_?"

Now it was her turn to get angry. "Longer than YOU, if your son's age is any indication!" she snapped.

That threw him a bit, but he persisted. "How _long_ , Logan? How long did he wait?"

"TWO YEARS!" she snapped. "Over two years! And it isn't what you think!"

"Oh," Sheppard said, somewhat mollified. Mollified and surprised. He wouldn't have thought it would take him that long.

"And YOU are the one who took it upon yourself to make him promise to take care of us!"

"Yeah... So?" he looked away sheepishly.

"JOHN SHEPPARD!" she shook her head angrily. "What were you THINKING?!"

"Well, I'm pretty sure I was thinking that I was about to die and I didn't want you and the kids to be..." he stopped short.

"To be...?" she prompted.

"Alone," he finished.

"Uh-huh..."

"But I'm not dead," he pointed out, biting back a smile.

"Clearly. But none of us knew that, did we?" she pointed out.

"Uh...no..." he admitted.

"John..." she choked back tears at the memory. "I saw where you fell... I saw your...body...at the bottom of that gorge. I FELT you... go..." she sniffled. "I saw you in my office and I knew... I ran to the gate and when I got there, you were gone. We couldn't find your body..."

He took her in his arms and held her close. "I'm sorry, baby, I'm so, so sorry..." he murmured.

"I missed you... sooooo much..." she cried.

"I know," he cooed.

"I didn't just lose my husband, you know? I lost my life-long best friend! The man who was always there to... pick me up, when I fell, the one who comforted me through... whatever... I was so lost without you," she sobbed. "I never stopped loving you."

"And so Cameron was there..."

"Yes! Just like you asked him to be! But he was my friend, my support... It's not like he tried to step right into your shoes and take over where you left off!" she wiped away angry tears.

"He's always been in love with you, though."

"Yes, he has, and he's never gotten out of line because of it. He missed you, too, John! He lost his best friend, too! It took him a while to get over that, not that he ever really did."

"Okaaaay... fair enough. You said two years, right?"

"Yeah."

"So are you guys..." he trailed off and shrugged.

"No," she informed him.

"No? Just no?" he blinked. "You're not together? You haven't gotten married yet? Haven't added to the family? What?"

She blushed fiercely, shame and guilt washing over her. "We... uh... did... um... God this is _so_ hard..."

"Just tell me," he said, taking her hand in his. He could see the pain in her eyes.

"Long story, short? Excessive booze plus excruciating pain makes for very poor judgment. It happened one time - and only one time - in my state I thought... I mean... basically, I used him. I don't really remember much but I do know that it was your face I was seeing, not his. When I came to the next morning, I was horrified by what I'd done. It never happened again, but..."

"What?" he prodded, agonized for her.

"That was all it took," she told him, shame all over her face. "Two months later, I found out I was pregnant and... I gave birth three months ago."

"Three months ago," he repeated. It hurt, he couldn't lie to himself. But he was more hurt for her - and everything she'd gone through since he'd been gone. "So... boy? Girl?"

"Yes."

"Yes what?" he asked, clearly puzzled.

"One of each," she explained.

"Twins?!" he coughed.

"Yes."

"Mitchell..." he growled, shaking his head. "...always the overachiever..."

"John!"

"Sorry... Look, I know I have no right to be... jealous... But, I can't seem to help it where you're concerned. I mean, we were... you and I, trying to make a baby before...you know... weren't we?"

"I remember... Ironically because we both realized that life was too short (looking pointedly at him) to put off having what we both knew we wanted."

"What about Chels and Nic...? Are they okay with your new... thing?"

"Thing?" she cast him a scolding look. "There is no _thing_ , new or otherwise. As for Cam? They love Cameron, you know that. And they love the twins. Chels is... quite the little Mama..." she trailed off at the wistful expression on his face.

"Three years... She's five now... And Nic is... four... Do they... Have they forgotten me?" he asked sadly, pained at the thought.

She was quick to respond to that. "NO! NO, John, NEVER! There are pictures of you all over their rooms, and the videos we shot... We talk about you alot... I never wanted them to forget you, and I... WE have done everything we could to keep you alive in their hearts and in their memories."

"We?"

"Everyone who knew and loved you - and that's A LOT of people, John."

"Oh."

"Now... What say you tell me about... _your_... son?"

He nodded. "His name is Tomas," he said.

"For your father," she noted.

"I... uh... Didn't know that at the time..." he reminded her.

"He looks a lot like Nic... and Ryan...and Matt... and Chels..." she smiled fondly.

"Sheppard genes..." he muttered softly.

"He's beautiful, John. And, his mother, this... Yehra... Do you love her...?"

"No!" he replied vehemently. "No. Not even a little."

"But you..."

"Yeah, well... She _lied_ to me about who I was, who _we_ were... I was playing the part of dutiful husband and I..." he trailed off.

"But you must have found her...attractive..." she said, trying to keep the bitterness out of her tone; trying not to think about the two of them living together as husband and wife.

"I'm not saying she's not... pretty... but... if you want to hear something really funny... not funny, funny, but ironic funny..."

"Spit it out, Flyboy," she prodded.

"That husbandly duty? One time, Logan. I swear, it happened one time and then I couldn't... I just couldn't. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know what. It just felt wrong - like I was being...

"Disloyal?" she cringed. It had been exactly how she felt. "Like you were being unfaithful?"

"Yes! I'd have these flashes, these images in my head, but they'd go by so fast, I couldn't hold onto them. One of them was your face. I had no idea who you were, but... I can't explain it. Anyway, that night, I'm pretty sure she put something in my tea," he blurted out.

"What?" she gasped.

"Yeah... You know, like she did with the draught she put in yours to make you sleepy? She has all kinds of potions and stuff."

"But you stayed."

"I didn't know anything else, Sparks."

Her heart turned over at the use of his nickname for her.

"This place, these people, they were all I knew. She wound up pregnant..." he paused at the irony. "After that, whatever ideas I might have had about leaving were..."

"Gone... You could never leave your child," she nodded.

"No... I _do_ love my son, Sparks..."

"As you should. But you don't love his mother?"

"I _care_... about her... But I could never bring myself to... I never found a way to love her..." he trailed off, shaking his head. "But, you love Cameron."

She paused for a long moment before answering him. "Yes, I do. Just like I did before you were taken from us. No more, no less."

He nodded.

"And you've always known that," she reminded him. " _You_ love him too. We grieved for you... for so long. It was hell, John... Three years, without you. Trying to carry on for the kids. The shame I feel over having been unfaithful to you... The conflicting emotions I had when I found out I was pregnant... the guilt... Trying to reconcile the need for my best friend during that time against the realization that if my best friend were there, then I wouldn't be having a baby - two babies - with anybody else... Don't get me wrong, I don't mean to say that I wish someone had mercifully taken my memories away, so it wouldn't hurt so much, but..."

"But?"

"You weren't the one walking around in a fog thinking *I* was dead and you had to find a way to move on."

"Uh... been there, sweetheart, remember?" he told her.

"Yes, I do... So you should have at least _some_ idea of how hard it was for me!" she cried.

"Granted," he nodded.

"But?"

"There's no but..."

"John..."

"Come on, you and I both know I've never been rational when it comes to you! But that being said... Sparks, as much as I hate it, I know you were never unfaithful. Circumstances put us in a terrible position. We both... we were forcibly sidetracked. And while I couldn't remember with my head, you were always in my heart. I never stopped loving you. And, hear me on this, Sparks... you have nothing to be ashamed of. Not about Mitchell, or the twins - how they came to be - none of it."

"John..."

"I want my family back..." he cut her off.

"Well... That's going to be a bit complicated now, isn't it?" she snorted.

"To say the least," he nodded.

"These people here... I don't think they're going to be too inclined to let you go, least of all, Yehra."

"They don't have a choice," he muttered darkly.

"Then there's the matter of your son. You can't leave him, or take him from his mother..." she said bitterly.

"I won't stay here, Sparks... I want _you_! I want my kids... Mike, the boys... Cam... Your twins... I want to come _home_..." he trailed off, determination in his eyes.

KR5-118

"I've got it!" McKay yelled.

"Dial it!" Mitchell barked impatiently.

"Dialing!" McKay snapped back.

As one, all three teams that had come to search for Logan raced toward the gate, weapons at the ready. They didn't even slow down as the wormhole engaged, and ran right through. No one appeared to be around on the other side, but they didn't drop their guard. Mitchell motioned for everyone to spread out and begin searching.

BUSEK'S HOME

"You don't have any recent pictures of the kids, do you?" Sheppard asked.

"Of course," she smiled, reaching into her her jacket pocket. "Everywhere I go."

He took the pictures and stared at the now older faces of his children. His heart broke as he saw just how much they had grown in three years, and how much he had missed. He then looked at a third picture showing Chelsea and Nic each holding a tiny infant in front of them. They looked happy enough. He could easily see the boy's resemblance to Mitchell, but the girl was all Logan. She finally had a child that resembled her for a change.

"They're beautiful," he said and genuinely meant it.

"Thank you," she blushed, alternately still ashamed and proud at the same time.

"What did you name them?" he asked, already falling in love with the both of them.

"His name is Scott, he's the oldest, and her name is Cadence."

"Cadence? That's pretty... She looks just like you - I mean EXACTLY like you. And Scott... You named him for Cam? His middle name..."

She nodded. "I know this is weird..."

"You could say that," he grimaced. "But we can manage."

"How are we going to get out of here, John?" she asked, changing the subject.

He shrugged. "Damned if I know, but we _will_ get home."

"Are none of them reasonable enough?"

"Yeah... some. That woman who was in here with Busek - her name is Riateh. Busek is, but he's Yehra's oldest friend. I'm just... I don't really want to hurt Yehra, but..." he shook his head.

"I know. But John, she's already hurting because you don't love her the way she wants you to; the way she loves you. Unless you have a sudden change of heart..." she trailed off.

"No! Never," he said emphatically.

"...then there's no way to avoid her pain... emotionally speaking, I mean," she sighed. "Would she come willingly... to Atlantis?"

The thought of her being anywhere near her or her children was more than a little nauseating, but it was the only way that both John and Yehra could have equal access to their son. And for Chelsea and Nic to know their new brother.

"I don't know. She's kind of a leader here, especially given her abilities..." he shrugged.

"How many people are here?" she asked.

"About a hundred or so..."

A sudden commotion out in the square caught their attention. They could hear shouts and people screaming. They ran to the window and looked out in time to see someone, they couldn't tell who, run past wearing an SG uniform.

"Mitchell and the troops," Sheppard said dryly, a smile spreading across his face.

A moment later, the door burst open and McKay stood there pointing a gun at them.

"Rodney!" Logan called out, instinctively stepping in front of Sheppard.

"Logan! We've been looking..." he stopped as Sheppard stepped out from behind her so McKay could see his face. "Oh my God! He looks just like..."

"He IS, Rodney," Logan said, grinning like a loon.

"But he's..."

"He WAS," Sheppard corrected, a wry grin on his face. "But he's feeling _much_ better now," he quipped.

"Oh yeah... That's definitely you..." McKay rushed forward and enfolded Sheppard in a great big bear hug.

Sheppard chuckled, hugging him back. "It's good to see you, Rodney."

"Oh no... I... uh... that is..." McKay stammered, glancing at Logan with a panicked expression.

"He knows, Rodney," Logan assured him.

"Does he now? Well then, someone should go and head off Colonel Mitchell... Probably me..." he stammered and turned to leave, only to find Mitchell standing in the doorway.

Logan cringed as blue eyes met green ones and locked. "John?" Mitchell gasped, unable to believe his eyes.

"It's me..." Sheppard said flatly, a myriad of emotions warring within him. Part of him was happy to see his friend, but there was also part of him that saw him as a rival, of sorts, to getting his family back.

Without another word, Mitchell rushed forward and grabbed Sheppard in an enthusiastic bear hug. "It's really you?!" he murmured.

Sheppard softened and hugged the other man back, remembering the brotherly affection he'd always felt for him. "Yeah, buddy... It's really me," he murmured back.

The others drew in a sigh of relief, both that John Sheppard was alive after all, _and_ that the two men hadn't come to blows under the clearly difficult circumstances surrounding this revelation. When the two men parted, Teyla stepped forward and hugged him, followed by Ronon, Teal'c, Daniel, Carter and Lorne. The others were still out in the village square, securing the area against any opposition they might throw up when they extracted their people.

"How...?" Mitchell asked.

"That... is a _very_ long story..." Sheppard winced, looking to Logan for help in explaining.

Mitchell hadn't missed the automatic, and almost unconscious, unity between the two of them, not that it was entirely unexpected, given their history. But, so strong and palpable was their connection that it was almost as if they had never been apart. Together, the two of them explained what had happened after Sheppard fell, how his body had been spirited away by Yehra's people and her subsequent healing of him, as well as her attempts to spare him by locking away his memories, so he would not be haunted by his own murder. It was almost... eery, how easily the two of them slipped into the same old habit of speaking in unison and finishing one another's sentences. Not eery in the sense that it was something they'd never done before, but eery in the sense that they so easily slipped back into old habits without blinking.

Each of them were secretly wondering how this would affect the dynamic between Logan and Mitchell, now that her not-so-dead husband was back. This would not be easy for any of them, especially with three new children added to the mix - not to mention the woman who very much wanted to be the only Mrs. Sheppard.

But, for the moment, the problem was how to get Sheppard back to Atlantis without throwing the locals into an uproar. He could not leave his son behind, and it was doubtful that Yehra would let Sheppard and the boy go. Yehra would have to come as well, but _would_ she? And would her people let her leave?

"The only one who can convince her is you, John," Logan pointed out.

She wasn't eager to leave him alone with the woman. Something in her eyes had made it clear to Logan that she would just as soon take his life and hers, than let him go.

"I know... I'll talk to her," he said reluctantly.

The others filed out slowly, Logan last, exchanging a long, wistful glance with Sheppard. Yehra came in, pausing to look from one to the other and then focusing on Sheppard.

"I understand you wish to speak with me, Husband?" she asked, pointedly ignoring Logan.

Logan shook her head and walked out to join the others. Yehra was actually baiting her! The others had seen it too, and they all held their collective breath, wondering how Logan would respond. Each of them knew better than to anger her, but this woman did not. That; or she did not care that Logan could probably best her, in pretty much every way. They were relieved when she didn't rise to the bait. Mitchell watched her carefully, trying to gauge what was going through her mind. He was sure that her emotions were all over the place, and he was equally sure that there was a healthy measure of guilt coursing through her as well. She would not meet his eyes, and that, he knew, was a bad sign.


	68. Chapter 68

"Yehra, in the future, please do NOT try to bait my wife like that again," Sheppard warned.

"I am your..." she began, but stopped at the hard glint in his eyes.

"NO!" he said decisively. "You are _not_ , and we both know it. I was already married when you found me. And, knowing what I know now... It's pretty clear to me that you _knew_ that. AND that I already had two children as well."

"What makes you think..."

He held up a hand to stop her. "That first memory you restored in my mind? That was a very specific memory, and you were able to pick out that specific memory from a lifetime of others. You had to be able to READ those memories in order to do that, right?"

"I...yes..." she admitted, flushing.

"So, you knew I was married, yet you kept that from me along with everything else."

"I did not read all of your memories, Adahm..."

"John! My name is JOHN," he corrected.

"John... I did not read all of them... Yes, I saw that you had a wife, but that is where I stopped. I did not know about the children, I swear to you!"

"You knew I had a wife, Yehra, and still you kept the truth from me."

"I had no way of knowing that she was not aligned with the man who pushed you from the cliff! I was protecting you!"

"Stop lying to me!" Sheppard barked. "You saw her, in my mind, in my memories, so you knew damn well how happy we were! You took that from me. You saved my life, for which I will always be grateful, but then you turned right around and took it from me again. You took me from my life, a life I loved, you took me from my wife, from my kids, my friends, my family... You put the people who love me - the people I love - you put them through hell!" he paused a moment. "Alright, I didn't really want to get into this right now, so we'll shelve all of that for the time being... Here's the problem we face at the moment..."

He went on to explain that he wanted to go home, and for him, home meant Atlantis, Logan and his children. When she began to protest, he explained that she could come with them and live in Atlantis, too. In fact, he had a feeling that the entire population of the village could come with them, to live either in Atlantis, on the mainland, or maybe even some of the other planets they had cultivated and set up as outposts. When he had finished presenting his case, she took a few moments to think about it, then nodded her acquiescence.

"What about the others? Do you think they'll try to prevent us from leaving?" he asked.

"They will not be happy about my leaving them, but I will not allow you to go without me."

He knew what she was thinking, but now was not the time to correct her mistaken notion that they would be together. He first had to get her and, more importantly, his _son_ to Atlantis, without a fight. Then he would make sure she understood that by taking her along, he wasn't promising her a future with _him_.

It was easier than they thought to convince the others. Especially when they learned that the man they'd known as Adahm came from the home of the Ancestors - Atlantis. Riateh had been a big help in that regard - for which Logan was extremely grateful. They had balked at first, as expected, when they thought that Sheppard would be taking Yehra from them, but when they learned that all of them could leave as well, they were actually eager to do so. Logan explained that they would need a few days in order to make arrangements to house all of them, but there were a few who raised concerns about them failing to return once they were gone.

"That will not happen, my friends," Yehra assured them. "They will return, if for no other reason than the fact that Tomas and I will be remaining behind with all of you, until their return. Tomas' father will not leave him for long."

Sheppard glared at her in surprise, then looked at Logan. She shrugged, then pulled him aside to whisper in his ear. "It's only for a day or so, if that... She won't do anything to lose her hold over you, so you don't have to worry about her hiding him from you. It's not ideal, but what other choice do we have?"

He nodded and walked over to talk to his son. Mitchell watched Logan's face carefully, for any hint of her true reaction to Sheppard's current situation. But, true to form, she wasn't giving anything away.

"Yehra, you have our word that we will return. And all of your people will be taken to Atlantis," he promised.

"I believe you, Colonel Mitchell," she replied, her eyes locked on Sheppard.

While these negotiations were going on, Lorne was back at the gate speaking via radio with the now recalled General Caldwell.

"Say again?" Caldwell asked incredulously.

"It's true, sir, I've seen and spoken to him myself. I'll leave the how and why up to Colonel Sheppard to explain. Colonels Mitchell and Devane are requesting that the gate room be cleared before we bring him through... To make things a little...easier."

"Okaaaay... When do you expect to be returning?" he asked.

Lorne looked at his watch, then over his shoulder. "Sometime in the next thirty minutes, sir. We're hoping anyway."

"Very well. Radio ahead when you're ready and I'll have the gate room cleared."

"Yes sir," Lorne replied.

With that, the gate shut down and Lorne made his way back to the village to inform his superiors.

Sheppard was holding his son on his lap, speaking to him in hushed, reassuring tones. The boy looked decidedly unhappy, wearing the same expression Nic always wore when he was less than pleased about something. Logan had to remind herself, when her heart screamed at her to reach out and comfort the boy, that this was NOT her son, but another woman's child. She was also acutely aware that the boy's mother was also present, and watching her like a hawk. Reluctantly she admitted that she really couldn't, or rather SHOULDN'T blame her for feeling the way she did; after all, she didn't really want some other woman, namely Yehra, to interfere with HER children in any way.

When Sheppard was ready, he kissed the boy goodbye and promised to return for him very soon. Yehra came and took him by the hand and led him back to their home, so he would not have to see his father leave with the others. It was killing him to leave his son, even for a little while, but he knew he had to, for everyone's sake. He waited while the others went through the gate until only he and Logan remained. On impulse, he reached out and took her hand, squeezing it tightly. She smiled reassuringly and squeezed his hand back.

"Ready?" she asked.

"Ready," he replied.

"We asked Caldwell to clear the gate room, so you wouldn't be mobbed the instant you get back. He and Weir are going to want to debrief you without too much fuss."

"Good thinking... Besides, I don't want word getting back to the kids before we have a chance to... you know?"

"I know."

They stepped through the gate, side-by-side. Caldwell stared at him in disbelief when they reached the other side, and Weir couldn't contain herself. She threw her arms around him and hugged him fiercely.

"Welcome home, John!" she cried.

"Thanks... It's good to be home..." he replied, glancing at Caldwell. "Nic? Chels?"

Caldwell cleared his throat, fighting back his own emotions. "Still in Genoa. Janet had to sedate them."

Both Sheppard and Logan gasped in horror. "What..."

"They knew it," Mitchell murmured, shaking his head. "The little munchkins knew something was up."

"What do you mean?" Sheppard asked.

"Before I got the call, the both of them... they were fine one minute and the next, they went white and started crying for their Dad. I thought I had them calmed down; I promised to go find Logan and they seemed okay when I left, but they must have somehow sensed... something," he shrugged.

"We had no idea what was really going on, but they did wig out again," Caldwell told them. "She had no choice but to sedate them when they got so overwrought."

"They're going to be out for a while yet..."

Sheppard froze at the sound of that voice and then slowly turned toward it's source.

"But _I'm_ here."

"Mike!" Sheppard croaked hoarsely as Simmons rushed up and enveloped his younger brother in a giant bear hug.

"It's really you," Simmons sniffled. "John, I..." he trailed off to try and regain some control over his emotions. "They're okay, John. They were just upset and confused. They couldn't really articulate what they were feeling, but I think they could somehow suddenly sense that you were back."

"Oh my God," Logan gasped. Of course they had.

"I need to go get my kids," Sheppard coughed, looking to Caldwell.

"I understand how you feel, but..." he paused to take a deep breath. "You remember the drill, don't you?"

Sheppard looked blank for a moment, then slowly nodded his head. "Sir..."

"They're going to be asleep for a while, John. We'll bring them here, but they won't be awake for hours. There's time for you to get checked out by Beckett, get the all-clear and get your bearings again."

He looked like he wanted to argue the point, but Logan gave his hand a squeeze and he simply nodded.

"On it," Simmons said, clapping him on the back before turning to face the stargate.

"Dial Genoa," Caldwell called out to Kestler before looking at Sheppard again. "You remember the way?" Caldwell smiled.

"Yes sir," Sheppard nodded.

"And John?"

"Yes sir?"

Caldwell stepped up and impulsively wrapped him in a manly hug. "Welcome home."

Logan stood by - close at hand - while Sheppard endured the standard exam, as per protocol. While neither of them said anything, it was apparent to anyone who knew them that they couldn't bear to be apart, now that Sheppard had returned from the dead. After changing into scrubs, they were taken to a private room within the infirmary, where Simmons and Fraser soon entered carrying the limp, sleeping forms of their children. Sheppard's knees buckled as he was overcome with emotion at the sight of his so much bigger children - the enormity of all he'd missed washing over him like a rogue wave. Fraser gave him a quick hug, then followed her husband out to give them some privacy. Logan held him while they both cried - first tears of sorrow, and finally tears of joy at being reunited again.

As it turned out, it had been a good thing that the kids had been sedated. Their own emotions were so raw and exposed that they needed the time to get themselves under control before trying to explain everything to Nic and Chelsea. While they waited, they talked quietly while Sheppard studied every intricate detail of his children's faces. Other than getting older and bigger, he still recognized the babies they had once been. The only times he could bear to tear his eyes away from them, was to look at Logan. He was thankful - so very thankful - to have this second chance with them. He tried to hold on to just the gratitude and not let the resentment or bitterness seep in about how much time Yehra had stolen from them. Time enough for that later. He'd been away from his family for far too long as it was, and he didn't want anything negative intruding on his happy reunion.

"I see so much of Nic in Tommy," Sheppard murmured softly.

Logan nodded. "They're both virtual clones of you."

"Do you hate me?" he asked. "For Tommy?"

She shook her head vehemently. "No! Never, John. I could never hate you, no matter what. Never. And I could never hate or resent _him_ ; you should know that. He's part of you. Hell, from the little I've seen of him, he's _all_ you! I could no more hate or resent _him_ , than I could Nic or Chels. Tell me you _know_ that?"

He smiled and nodded. "I do know that. I just... I guess I just needed to hear it out loud. I'd give anything for him to be yours though. You are the only woman I ever wanted to have kids with."

A shadow fell across her face and she did her best to hide it. But then she never could hide anything from him. "Same here."

"No, no, no, no..." he shook his head and reached out to cup her face in his hands. "None of that, Sparks. I told you, there is nothing for you to be ashamed of. So what if it isn't ideal, or how we always imagined it to be? Yeah, I wish the twins were mine, just like I wish Tommy was yours. That didn't happen. We accept it and embrace it and hold on tight to each other for the rest of our lives. There is no alternative. You are it for me, Logan Sheppard. You are my heart - my soul. Our children, yours, mine and ours - they are everything."

Tears were streaming down her face as he spoke. His words echoed everything she was feeling herself. There would be adjustments to make, no question, but for now, they were just happy to have found one another after all the time they'd lost. Despite all odds, despite the long separation, despite the pain and loneliness, despite all of it - they had a second chance. Neither of them were going to waste it.

"I _love_ you, John. I always have and I _always_ will. However uncomfortable certain issues may be or may get, I don't want to waste another moment - not when we've already lost so much time. I am _yours_ , heart and soul."

He smiled through a fresh wave of tears and took her hands in his. "Back atcha," he managed to choke out.

Just then, Mitchell brought the twins in so Sheppard could meet them before Nic and Chelsea woke up - thereby lessening some of any possible tension that might arise. The situation was awkward, but this was _Sheppard_. His brother in arms and so much more. He knew that Sheppard would come to love his twins as much as Mitchell loved Nic and Chelsea. Loving them would be all the more easy, given that they were Logan's children too. Once past the initial awkwardness, Sheppard fell instantly in love with both infants and surprised himself by acknowledging that he was genuinely happy for Mitchell. He'd known how much he'd always wanted kids. And they were beautiful babies. Cadence, as had been his initial impression, did look exactly like Logan had as a baby; with the exception of the crystal blue eyes. And Scott had all his father's features. Sheppard held them both on his lap and stared intently at them. For their part, the wide-awake twins regarded him with equally intense scrutiny. Mitchell would have sworn that they actually recognized him - not that that was possible - but still, they were totally at ease in his arms.

It wasn't until Chelsea began to stir, that Mitchell took the twins back and left them to break the joyous news to the children. When Chelsea began to thrash around in her sleep, Sheppard gently took her in his arms and began to whisper to her reassuringly.

"Daddy," she whimpered, not quite awake.

Sheppard held her close, while Logan gently stroked her dark, unruly hair. "I'm here, Sweet-pea," he cooed. "Daddy's here."

"Daddy," she whimpered again, struggling now to open her eyes.

"I'm here baby-girl," he murmured softly.

Her eyes opened and slowly focused on his handsome, smiling face. "Daddy?!" she gasped, throwing her arms around his neck, setting off a fresh wave of tears - this time from all three of them.

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy," she cried, clinging desperately to him. "I knew you'd come home!" Sheppard nodded, unable to speak as he rubbed her back comfortingly while he paced back and forth across the room.

"I missed you so much!" she snuffled.

"I missed you too, Sweet-pea," he murmured, tears streaming down his face.

After she had calmed a bit, and her sobbing eased, she pulled back to look at his face, before reaching up to gently pat his cheeks, just as she had as a baby. "Nic! Nic! Look! It's Daddy!" she cried, twisting around in Sheppard's arms to look at her still sleeping brother.

"He's still sleeping off the medicine Aunt Janet gave you guys," Logan whispered.

She shook her head and wiggled closer to Nic and touched his forehead. "Nic, wake up."

"Baby, I don't think..." Logan stopped in mid-sentence as Nic's eyelids fluttered, then opened.

His gaze was unfocused, at first, then began to clear.

"Look Nicky! Daddy's home! I told you he was coming home! I _told_ you!" Chelsea cried, beaming happily as she wrapped her arms around Sheppard's neck again and they sat on the bed next to him.

Sheppard glanced at Logan, the same question in his eyes that she had, but neither had much time to dwell on it, since Nic struggled to sit up, then climbed onto Sheppard's lap with his sister, his eyes wide with wonder.

"Daddy?"

"Hey Son," Sheppard replied, rubbing his back too.

"Not a dream?" he looked from Sheppard to Logan and back again.

"Not a dream, baby," Logan sniffled. "Daddy's really home."

Chelsea shifted slightly so Nic could wrap his arms around Sheppard's neck. "I remember you," he said and promptly burst into tears.

Outside, their friends and family had gathered and were watching through the window. Everyone, Caldwell included, were bawling their eyes out - tears of joy and wonder - completely overcome with the emotion of this reunion.

"You're not going to leave again?" Chelsea asked, though it was more of a demand than a question.

"Not if I can help it, Sweet-pea. I never want to leave you guys ever again."

"Where _were_ you?" Nic demanded.

"It's still a little confusing, and a long story, but Mom and me will try to explain," Sheppard nodded.

Intrigued, they sat calmly, quietly and listened intently as Logan slowly began to explain about the Ancient healing powers that some of the Ancients possessed, and that she believed some of those Ancient's descendents still possessed that power. She wasn't sure exactly how much they really understood, but they both stiffened and sat up straighter when she told them that, after his death, one of these people had found their father and took his body back to her homeworld.

"Why?" Chelsea asked.

"Because she felt badly about what Gere did to your father, when he hurt him."

She then took a deep breath and told them that this woman had used her healing powers to heal their father and bring him back to life.

"But... he would... why wouldn't he be _here_ if she did that...?" Chelsea frowned.

"Yes, he would have come home, but... She did something else to him when she healed him," Logan began.

"What?" asked Nic.

"She was afraid that it would... hurt him too much to remember what Gere did to him, so she thought it would be kinder to take away his memories, so he wouldn't hurt anymore..."

"So he wouldn't remember us?" Nic asked.

"Right. But, your father, being the big, stubborn...man...that he is, he knew something wasn't right, so he kept asking, and asking until she had no choice but to give him back his memories."

"Daddy you're really... you're going to _stay_ with us, right?" Chelsea asked. "For sure, for sure and forever and always?"

"Yes Sweet-pea, I promise," Sheppard assured her.

They looked excited, but then they looked away, their eyes downcast.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"What about Tommy?" they asked in unison.

That shook both Logan and Sheppard to their core. How could they possibly know about him?

"Tommy?" Sheppard fumbled.

"Is he coming to stay with us too?" they asked.

"I... yes... uh... sort of..." Sheppard stammered.

"How do you two know about Tommy?" Logan asked, thunderstruck.

"He's our brother," they answered simply - as if that explained everything.

"He is," Sheppard nodded.

"Okay then," Chelsea chirped.

"But we didn't tell you about him... yet," Logan pointed out.

"We already knew," they replied in unison.

"How?" Sheppard and Logan asked.

They paused, looking to one another for the answer and, finding none, they shrugged. "Dunno."

"I'll share my room with him," Nic changed the subject.

"I... uh... we still have a few things to work out, but that's very nice of you," Sheppard replied, nervously eyeing Logan.

"Why?" Chelsea asked. "He's our brother, he should live with us. Like Scotty and Cadence."

"It's not quite the same," Sheppard winced.

"Why?" they asked.

"Well..." he hadn't expected to tackle this question so soon.

"Guys, Tommy's mom would be very sad if he didn't live with her, but they'll be close by and you can see him every day," Logan jumped in.

Sheppard smiled at her gratefully.

"Tommy's mom?" they blinked at her in confusion. "But you're Tommy's mom."

Words failed her. She opened her mouth, then closed it again. Sheppard was likewise frozen.

"Aren't you?" Nic prodded.

"No guys," she finally managed. "Like with the twins..." she paused to take a deep breath. "How Uncle Cameron is their Daddy, Tommy has a different Mommy, like Scotty and Cadence have a different Daddy."

"We're still a family, just... different," Sheppard nodded, hoping they would accept this and leave it at that.

Neither of them looked like they were buying it though. Chelsea looked from her father to her mother and back again, then caught Nic's eyes. Something unspoken seemed to pass between them and Nic nodded slightly.

"Okay," they said.

"Okay," Logan and Sheppard nodded, both of them still completely thrown for a loop.


	69. Chapter 69

By the time Beckett finally cleared Sheppard and released him from the infirmary, the children were barely able to keep their eyes open. But, they wouldn't allow themselves to fall asleep, for fear that Sheppard would be gone when they woke up again. It tore their hearts out to see how fearful the kids were. It was understandable, but heartbreaking. Even when they got back to their quarters, they refused to sleep in their own rooms unless Sheppard were there with them. Logan herself couldn't help but feel somewhat fearful about losing Sheppard again, so she readily agreed that it would be best - for that night at least - to allow the kids to sleep with them; all of them together, in one bed, except for the twins, since Mitchell was keeping them overnight so they could focus on the work of re-integrating their family. Aside from wishing for a little privacy with his wife, Sheppard didn't really mind. With each passing minute, it was clear how much he had missed of their lives - how much he had missed them; even when he couldn't remember them. No, he was in no hurry to leave them - even for a little while.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"And you think there are Ancients among them?" Weir asked, clearly intrigued.

"Pretty sure. And I'm pretty darn sure Yehra is one of them. I mean, she WAS able to bring me back to life, so..." Sheppard shrugged, his eyes on the form of his daughter sitting just outside the conference room.

Nic had relaxed somewhat when it came to letting Sheppard out of his sight. Of course it helped that Bates was a great distraction. But Chelsea would not be so easily distracted. She had insisted on accompanying her parents to the meeting, even if she couldn't come inside, and she would not be deterred. For their normally exceptionally well-behaved daughter to behave so completely out of character, they knew that her fears were running deeper than they'd hoped. Caldwell had no problem accommodating her - within reason - so, on her promise of good behavior, he'd allowed her to take up a watch just outside the conference room, where she could keep an eye on Sheppard.

"A living, breathing Ancient..." Daniel's eyes lit up.

"How many among them do you think ARE Ancients?" Caldwell asked.

"I'm not sure. I've only seen maybe a handful of them demonstrate what you might call some special type of ability. Or who seem to have more... knowledge... than the others. Yehra is the only one I've seen... uh... up close..." he said, uncomfortably, unable to meet Logan's eyes.

"What was her reaction to learning about Atlantis?" Daniel asked.

"She was... intrigued, and I'm pretty sure she was trying to act surprised, but I don't think she was. If any of us are supposed to believe she was telling the truth about not reading all of my memories, then she probably didn't know that this is where I came from."

"Well, we already know she isn't telling the truth about _that_ ," Mitchell coughed.

"If she is one of the Ancients, do you think she'll admit to it?" Weir asked, trying to keep them on track.

"I honestly don't know."

"Well, we won't find out anything if we don't get them here," Caldwell pointed out. "Do we have housing for them, yet?"

"We've moved all personnel from the north tower and cleared it for them, sir. There's plenty of room for them there, it's secure and far enough removed from stargate operations to keep any of them from wandering in and out of the control room." Logan informed him.

"Colonel Sheppard. Are you ready to bring them in?" Caldwell asked.

"Yes, sir."

"Five teams, and I want a full escort from the gateroom to the north tower. We can't have them wandering the halls... At least not yet."

"I have escort teams chosen and standing by, Sir." Logan said.

"Let's do this," Weir said.

Caldwell glanced out the window at Chelsea and blew out a heavy sigh. "Is this going to be a problem for the Cadet?"

Logan and Sheppard exchanged a wary glance then looked at Chelsea - who still hadn't taken her eyes off her father.

"Sorry Sir," Sheppard murmured.

"It'll get easier," Weir assured them. "She's welcome to hang out with me, if that helps?"

"Or me," Caldwell offered.

Sheppard looked at Logan, then shook his head. "We'll talk to her."

The others filed out, each of them stopping briefly to talk to Chelsea, while Sheppard and Logan hung back to wait for the room to clear. They watched as each one approached their daughter, but the only one who was able to get her to look away from Sheppard was Mitchell. Even then, it was just for a few seconds. Then she hugged him and returned to her vigil once again.

"We're going to have to find a way to nip this in the bud," Sheppard sighed. "I don't want her to be upset or scared, but..."

"Life has to return to normal eventually," Logan finished for him.

"I'm not exactly in a rush, but yeah... I do need to get back out there. I've been away from the fight for too long as it is."

Logan nodded. He did need to get back out there. No question. His strength and skill had been sorely missed the past three years. She had her own demons to fight in that regard, but there was no question that he had to do it. She had absolute faith in him. What had happened before never would have happened, if not for Gere. And then Yehra. A fluke. No, Sheppard could more than handle himself out there and she knew it. Now they just had to convince their daughter to remember and trust in everything she knew about her father.

"Chelsea."

She immediately hopped off the chair she'd been sitting in and rushed to her father's side. "Yes Daddy?"

"We need to have a little talk," he told her, picking her up and plopping her on his lap.

Logan took a seat next to them, her eyes fixed on their daughter.

"You want to leave again," she frowned.

"It's not like that," Sheppard shook his head. "It's not, and I need you to hear me on this, okay?"

"Okay," she replied.

"You wanted me to bring Tommy here, right?"

She nodded emphatically. "We have to."

"Right. So that means I have to go back to Ordana to get him..."

She nodded again. "And his mom, I know."

"Okay good," he chirped. "So you understand that I'm just going to go there and come right back, and you're okay with that."

"Of course," she smiled brightly.

"Good," he arched an eyebrow at Logan. That had been too easy. Especially considering she hadn't let him leave her sight even to come to the meeting. "Good. And I promise, I'll be right back. You have nothing to worry about."

"I know," she chirped.

"Do you?" Logan asked suspiciously.

"Yes Mommy," she nodded.

"Not to sound ungrateful, but... why? I mean, you wouldn't let me come to the meeting here without you, so..."

She rolled her eyes and let out a long suffering sigh. "Because I'm coming too," she said simply, her tone brooking no argument.

Logan blinked and her jaw dropped. Sheppard sputtered and shook his head.

"Chels... I can't take you off-world," he told her.

Her face fell and her eyes clouded over. "Daddy... you can't go alone."

"I won't be alone," he assured her. "Uncle Cam is coming, and Lt. Colonel Lorne, Uncle Rodney, Ronon, Teyla..." he trailed off. "A buncha people, so I won't be alone."

She set her jaw stubbornly, an internal struggle over what to say, or how much, was going on in her little head. "They were with you before..." she trailed off.

If Logan hadn't been sitting down, her knees would have buckled at the implication. She was right, of course, up to a point. All of them had been on that fateful mission three years before and it hadn't prevented Sheppard from being lost to them. Sheppard was gutted by that half-spoken admission of lost trust - even in Mitchell.

"Chelsea Sheppard," Logan was the first to find her voice again. "You know what happened to Daddy wasn't their fault. Have you been blaming them all this time?"

She shook her head but didn't avert her gaze. "No."

"Gere was a very bad man and he wanted to hurt Daddy. It was just dumb luck that he got the chance to do it where the others couldn't see him or stop him. There is no one on Ordana who wants to hurt Daddy. They all love him."

"Please don't make me stay!" Chelsea cried. "Please Daddy! Please don't go without me!" she threw her arms around his neck and sobbed inconsolably. "I have to be there..."

"Why do you have to be there, Sweet-pea?" he whispered, rubbing her back as he spoke.

"To make sure," she snuffled. "I have to make sure."

He looked helplessly at Logan, who was as torn up as he was over her anguish. "Make sure of what, baby? I mean, I get that Teyla's been working with you on self-defense and all that - Mommy told me, but if you can't trust someone as big and strong as Uncle Cam, or Ronon to watch my six, then..."

"It has to be me," she insisted. "Not just for you... Tommy... he's scared. He needs me too."

THIRTY MINUTES LATER

They hadn't been able to budge Chelsea one inch and she'd become so overwrought that they were either going to have to sedate her, or keep Sheppard from going to retrieve his own son. Caldwell spoke with Heightmeyer and she agreed that since there was likely no danger, she should be allowed to go with her father for this one quick trip. She needed to see for herself that there was no danger or threat. Needed to feel some sense of control or that she was helping, in order to get over this fear of losing him again. She agreed that it could only help the boy too, to have someone close to his own age to talk to about his new home - sibling or not. They didn't like it, but in the end, they relented and allowed her to go along. This time.

Chelsea had thanked them profusely and swore to her mother that she would protect Sheppard while they were gone, as well as Tommy. They still didn't understand just how she thought she could protect him whereas trained soldiers could not, but that was a discussion for another time. If nothing else, Chelsea could certainly run interference and keep Yehra from trying to seduce Sheppard, she smiled to herself. Petty, she knew, but she also knew that Yehra was not about to let Sheppard go easily. While she hadn't said as much, Logan had the impression that Chelsea knew it too and fully intended to put a stop to any notion that Sheppard would live with her instead of with them.

She didn't have time to dwell on it though, since the others were ready to go and she needed to get to her own duties. She might have preferred to go with Sheppard as well, but she knew that wouldn't be a good idea for several reasons. And it was important for her to stay behind to coordinate the escorts and make sure everyone was assigned quarters and accounted for after the last of them stepped through the gate. As the wormhole engaged, Sheppard gave Chelsea's hand a squeeze and cast a longing look up at Logan in the control room before leading their teams through the stargate to Ordana.

It took several hours to get Yehra's people settled in the north tower once they returned. As expected, those who knew what to look for, saw a hint of recognition in Yehra's eyes when she arrived through the stargate and looked around. It was, at least, somewhat familiar to her, as though she'd been there before, or someplace very similar. Sheppard was carrying Tomas in his left arm, and holding Chelsea's hand with the other. Yehra trailed slightly behind them until she caught sight of Logan watching her, then she reached out and took Sheppard's arm and held on tightly. Logan was not the only one who saw her deliberate move, however. Weir, Caldwell, Mitchell and Daniel were all watching her very closely. Mitchell's eyes flashed angrily as he saw how the woman purposely tried to provoke Logan, or hurt her... Or both. But as much as it annoyed her, Logan simply shook her head and kept right on doing what she was doing.

Sheppard managed to shake his arm free after a moment, and following Yehra's eyes, he saw Logan turn away and go on about her job. Sheppard flashed Yehra a warning glare and shook his head. "I'm not going to warn you again, Yehra...STOP IT!" he growled through gritted teeth.

She looked sufficiently contrite, until he turned away, then she smiled slowly, very satisfied with herself. Sheppard might not have seen her sly smile, but Chelsea had.

"Oh she has no idea who she's messing with," Daniel observed.

"If she doesn't knock it off, she'll find out soon enough," Caldwell said.

"She can't possibly think that kind of behavior will win Sheppard over to her, could she?" Weir asked.

"Maybe she really didn't read all of Sheppard's memories... Or she'd know she was playing with fire," Mitchell said.

Once everyone else was settled in, Weir and Caldwell called a meeting with Yehra and the Elders from her village. Tommy was left in the capable hands of his Uncle Mike. As Sheppard, Chelsea and Bates escorted Yehra and her people down to the conference room, they unexpectedly bumped into Nic, who was on his way to the mess hall with Fraser for a snack.

"Daddy!" he cried out, launching himself into his arms.

"Hey Buddy!" he said, hugging him tightly.

Yehra watched this exchange with great interest; her mother's eye taking in every detail of the boy's features. He, too, looked exactly like his father, just as her own son, Tomas did. The elders, too, noticed the uncanny resemblance between Nic, Tomas, Chelsea and Sheppard, but made no comments. Chelsea kept a watchful eye on Yehra during this exchange, carefully taking note of the vibe coming off her in waves and strategically placed herself between her father, Nic and Yehra.

"Are you not going to introduce us husb..."

Sheppard wheeled on her angrily, silencing her with a glare, then returned his gaze to his son. "Nic, Daddy has to go into a meeting now, but I promise we'll come find you as soon as I'm done, okay?"

Nic thought about it for a moment, then looked around. "Where's Tommy?"

"With Uncle Mike," Sheppard informed him. "Maybe they'd like some ice-cream too," he suggested.

"Excellent suggestion," Fraser smiled. "We'll go meet up with them.

"Okay Daddy. We'll save you some ice-cream!" Nic grinned, hopping down to take Fraser's hand before turning back to Sheppard again, his eyes clouding over. "Daddy?"

Sheppard squatted down until he was eye-level with him. "Yeah buddy?"

Nic threw his arms around his neck and hugged him fiercely. "I missed you."

Sheppard held him tightly for a moment, struggling to keep his emotions under control. "I missed you too, Buddy."

Even Yehra could not miss the sadness and regret in their eyes over so much time apart, and for the first time, Yehra began to feel a slight twinge of guilt over what she'd done. As she watched the woman lead the child away, she saw him look back over his shoulder and blow a kiss to his father and sister.

"I love you, Daddy!" he called out.

"I love you, too, Nic!" he replied.

Busek stepped forward, blocking Sheppard's view of Yehra. "He is a handsome child, Sheppard..."

"Thank you. Right this way, please..." he said, continuing to lead them on, Chelsea - ever watchful - at his side.

TWO DAYS LATER

Yehra and Tomas were escorted by Bates to the gym for a little exercise and recreation time, but Bates was surprised to find Logan and Nic already there when they arrived. He watched Yehra's expression as she took in the sight of Logan dancing with her son. They seemed to be having a marvelous time, and he hated to intrude, but he knew she wouldn't be happy knowing that Yehra, of all people, was watching her when she wasn't aware of it. He cleared his throat and called out to alert Logan to their presence, much to Yehra's annoyance. Logan stopped in mid-step and turned to look at them. He could tell she was less than pleased to see Yehra, but that was only because he knew her so well. Her expression betrayed nothing of what was going on under the surface.

"L'tenant BATES!" Nic cried and charged over to him.

Bates hugged and kissed him affectionately before losing his attention to Tomas.

"Hi Tommy!" Nic greeted his little brother with a high-five, then looked up at the dour-faced woman holding Tomas' hand curiously and. Nic hadn't officially met her before and had no idea who she was.

"This your babysitter?" he asked him.

"Mama," Tomas told them.

Nic shifted his gaze to Logan and then up to Yehra. His body had stiffened, but he gave no other outward sign of distress. Nevertheless Bates reacted quickly to diffuse the sudden tension he could sense in Nic. "We can come back later when you're through, Ma'am," he offered.

"It's alright, Lieutenant, I see no reason they can't play together, unless Yehra is uncomfortable, of course?" she looked at the other woman questioningly.

"Not at all," she replied disdainfully. "I was actually hoping to meet Adahm's other child."

Logan clenched her jaw as Nic looked up at them. "Who's Adam?"

Logan patted the top of his head reassuringly. "She means your father."

Nic shrugged. "His name is JOHN," he corrected. "J-O-H-N, John!"

"I stand corrected, little one," Yehra smiled down at her, overly sweetly. "And who might you be?"

"Nicolas Sheppard," he replied politely. Without Chelsea there to act as a buffer, he could sense the full intensity of the woman's swirling emotions.

"I'm very pleased to meet you," she said, her voice sickly sweet again. And she meant it. She was happy to meet him, and she actually liked him.

"Is it alright if Tommy plays with us for a little while?" Nic asked.

"I suppose that would be alright."

She had no problem with the two boys spending time together. Had no problem with the fact that they were brothers. They should be close. The girl, on the other hand? She may look like her father, but Yehra suspected that she was more like her mother. The child never left her father's side when Yehra was around. She spoke very little and was always polite, but Yehra could sense that the child didn't trust her. That she blamed her for losing her father for all those years. Worse still, the child could sense Yehra's feelings too, even in spite of her best efforts to hide them. It made her nervous and uncomfortable. That child was trouble, and she didn't want Tomas anywhere near her.

The two children ran off to play with the "Lincoln Logs" stashed in one of the cabinets, leaving Logan to face Yehra.

"Such handsome children you have, Colonel... Of course they, like Tomas, look just like their father."

Bates rolled his eyes at the fully intentional and none-too-subtle dig.

"Of course," she replied, refusing to rise to the bait. "Tomas looks just like Nic did... John too, for that matter, at that age."

"I understand you have... other children... as well? Infants, if I'm not mistaken?" Yehra eyed her appraisingly. She didn't like being reminded how long she had known Sheppard.

"Yes, twins. A boy and a girl," she said proudly.

"And you left such helpless ones alone?"

"Certainly not!" Logan protested, but managed to hold her temper.

"Ma'am, the Colonel here is an exceptional mother, and her children are ALWAYS well-cared for. Your comments are uncalled for," Bates said warningly.

Sheppard had spoken to him already, warning him that Yehra would likely try to incite an argument, or worse, with Logan, and he wanted Bates to make sure Yehra didn't get out of line.

"Oh, I didn't mean to imply otherwise, I assure you. After all, my husband must have seen SOMETHING in her to have consorted with her in the first place..."

At another warning glance from Bates, Yehra stopped what she was doing. Logan glanced away, to make sure the children were nowhere within hearing distance. That "husband" comment she made HAD struck a nerve, but she wasn't about to give her the satisfaction of showing it.

"So, your new husband, he is a warrior as well?" Yehra went on.

"I believe you've already met Colonel Mitchell, ma'am," Bates reminded her. "...And..."

"And he's not my husband, but you already know that. Yehra... Listen, we're going to have to get something straight, right here and right now..." Logan began.

"And what might that be?" she asked icily.

"There's no denying that we're in an awkward position, circumstances being what they are, but there's no reason our children should have to suffer because of it."

"Meaning?" she arched her eyebrow suspiciously.

"Meaning that it would be very bad for them to see the two of us at each other's throats. They are _innocent_ children, and they have done nothing wrong. They never asked for any of this. They should feel free to play and be with one another without fear that their mothers will resort to name-calling and arguing."

"Is that what you think I'm doing?"

"I'm just saying... There's no reason we can't be civil to one another, if only for the sake of the children."

She continued to eye Logan suspiciously. "And what do you tell your children of me when I am not around?"

"What am I supposed to tell them? You are their brother's mother, and as such you are to be treated with the utmost respect. Always."

Yehra felt a knot in the pit of her stomach. She had not expected to actually...like...this woman. Or respect her. It infuriated her to no end that Logan WAS likable. She wanted her rival to be an utter shrew, if only to justify her own jealousy and insecurity. Not only was she incredibly beautiful, but she was a GOOD person. Even she could see that. And it was something that just made her hate and resent Logan more.

"I see," was all she said.

"I hope I can expect the same courtesy from you?" Logan added pointedly.

"Of course... If you will excuse me now, I did come here to play with _my_ son."

"Certainly," Logan smiled.

As he watched the angry woman walk away, Bates beamed with pride at the way Logan kept her cool. She was hundred times the woman Yehra was, classy as hell, and she didn't deserve the kind of treatment she had been receiving from that woman.

"What are you smiling at, Lieutenant?" Logan asked.

"You, ma'am..."

"Because...?"

"You're a class act, ma'am."

"Thank you, Lieutenant."

"Just calling it as I see it."

"You were awfully quick to jump to my defense there..." she noted.

"Colonel Sheppard warned me that she would probably step out of line and that I should do my best to keep her from doing so. But, I would have done it anyway."

"Oh?"

"We go back a ways, ma'am... And, don't we protect our own?" he asked.

"That we do, Bates, that we do. And, thank you."

"Anytime... And anything you need..."

Logan looked over at the children, laughing and playing on the floor, under the watchful eye of Yehra. She hated to pull Nic away from his brother, but she had to get back to the twins, as Janet was about to go on duty over in Genoa soon. "Nic? Say goodbye to your brother, for now. We have to get back home," she called out.

They were both disappointed, but they were well-behaved, well-disciplined children, who knew better than to argue.


	70. Chapter 70

Sheppard was in the gym shooting baskets with Chelsea, when Mitchell walked in. Neither man had spoken, in private, to the other since Sheppard's return and with Chelsea still stuck to Sheppard's side, it didn't look like this chance meeting would be a good time for a private conversation. He wasn't about to even try to chase Chelsea away. He knew, better than most, how excruciating the loss of her father had been for her. They both smiled at him in welcome and Sheppard waved him over.

"Hi Uncle Cam," Chelsea chirped happily as her shot landed in the basket.

"Hey Sweet-pea," he replied, coming over to pick her up and swing her around.

"Play with us?" she arched an eyebrow at him before looking over at her father.

Sheppard nodded, bouncing the basketball a few times before passing it over to Mitchell. "Maybe with you on my side, we can actually keep up with her," he quipped.

Chelsea chuckled and shook her head. "Should I go easy on you?"

ELSEWHERE

Logan stepped off the transporter and headed down the hall toward the control room when a small projectile, came flying down the hallway right at her. She instinctively reached down and grabbed said projectile, otherwise known as... "Tomas?" she said, settling him strategically on her hip.

"Nic an Chels pretty mama!" he greeted happily, reaching out to pat her face.

She smiled, completely disarmed by the boy. "Thank you, handsome, now what are you doing running around Atlantis, alone?" she asked, looking around for Yehra or Sheppard.

"Find Dada," he explained.

"Ah, I see... Well, I think I can help you with that, but where is your Mama?"

"Mama seep!" he announced.

"Oh... Okay... Shall we go find Daddy then?"

"Dada!" he grinned and then threw his little arms around her neck and hugged her tight.

Logan felt her heart turn over as he held onto her. He was so much like Nic, and every bit a Sheppard, through and through. His intelligence and sweetness shone through his eyes as he looked into hers and then patted her face gently again.

"Pretty!" he said.

"Thank you. You have your father's charm, little man," she replied.

She could easily find herself falling madly in love with the little boy, if she weren't already. She could ignore, almost completely, who his mother was because, like her two oldest children, Tomas was all Sheppard.

"Where Nic? Where Ches?" he asked, his hands up in the air as he asked.

"Chelsea is with your father and Nic is still in school."

"Skooool?" he repeated.

"Yes."

"I go skoool?" he asked.

"Not for a while, little man, you have a little more growing to do," she chuckled, holding him close as she walked.

"I go you?" he asked.

"To find your Daddy? Yes."

"I _stay_ you...?"

She smiled regretfully down at the handsome little face. "I would _love_ to hang out with you, Tomas, but I think... your mama would miss you."

He frowned a bit at that and shook his head emphatically. "No... Mama miss _Dada_ \- no Tomas."

He said it without malice or petulance, and it utterly broke her heart. "I think your mama would miss you alot if you weren't there."

At that he patted her face again, then laid his head on her shoulder and snuggled against her, just the way Nic and Chelsea used to do. She felt her heart melt even more as she rubbed his back and stroked the unruly soft, dark hair. She was quite certain, as she walked down the hall carrying him, that if Yehra happened to come along, the woman would try to throttle her for daring to touch her son. She was also sure that she didn't much care, at that point; though SHE would most assuredly come un-nutted if Yehra touched any of her children.

GYM

Sheppard was on the other side of the gym to retrieve the basketball that had gotten away from them. Mitchell waited, Chelsea on his hip.

"Uncle Cam?"

"Yeah baby?"

"Do you know Tommy's mom?" she asked, her expression guarded, but not fully.

"I've met her," he nodded.

"Is she like Gere?"

The question shook him deeply. "What makes you ask?" he stalled, glancing over her head at Sheppard, who somehow sensed that he needed to give them a little space.

"My gut," she replied.

"Okay," he paused. "And what is your gut telling you?"

"She... she... " she shook her head, trying to find the words. "She doesn't like Mommy. The way Gere didn't like Daddy. Kind of."

Oh Jim Dandy, the girl was sharp. But, if that's what she was thinking, it didn't make sense for her to be clinging to Sheppard, rather than Logan. She wasn't wrong - Yehra definitely wanted Sheppard - obsessively so.

"What makes you think that?" he asked, stalling for time to think. "Has she done or said something...?"

Chelsea shook her head and looked him right in the eye. "Not in words. Not to me. But I can tell."

"How?"

She shrugged and blew out a sigh. "I dunno. I just... know."

"If you're worried that she'll try to do to your Mommy what Gere did to Daddy..."

"No," she shook her head. "I think she's afraid of Mommy."

Mitchell smiled. "As she should be," he winked.

"She wants Daddy to go live with her again," she told him.

"Not gonna happen, Sweet-pea," he assured her, taking note that she didn't specify Yehra _and_ Tommy.

"I won't let her take him away again," she said.

"Is that why you won't let him go anywhere without you?" he prodded.

"Mostly," she nodded.

"What have we here?"

Both men, but not Chelsea, jumped when they heard her voice and turned to find Logan standing in the doorway, young Tommy perched on her hip.

"Tomas?" Sheppard asked as they approached.

"He's fine. I bumped into him when he was wandering the halls - alone - looking for you! Apparently, he has the same Sheppard wanderlust the rest of you have."

"Hi Mommy! Hi Tommy!" Chelsea grinned at them as Mitchell set her on her feet.

"I...uh...Thanks for looking out for him," he said as she handed him over into his arms and hugged her daughter.

"Of course," she smiled, reaching out to ruffle his hair. "He's quite the little charmer."

"Where's Yehra?" Mitchell asked.

"Mama seep," Tommy told them.

"Oh boy," Sheppard grimaced. He didn't like this at all. How could she be so careless?

Logan arched an eyebrow at him and Mitchell immediately put out his arms for Tommy. "Come here, big guy."

Tommy looked at Sheppard, who nodded, then willingly allowed Mitchell to scoop him up and carry him a few feet away to retrieve the basketball, Chelsea trailing along, but still keeping a watchful eye on Sheppard.

"I can't believe she did this!" Sheppard whispered harshly.

"I kept expecting her to run across us in the halls before I got to you," Logan admitted.

"She should be _grateful_ you found him," he growled.

"Not likely," she sighed. "Not that she'd want him to be hurt, but having _me_ find him..." she trailed off with a shudder. "Much as I'd like to be a bigger person, I can't say as I'd react any better if she touched Nic, Chels or the twins."

"Huge difference," he snorted. "And that won't happen."

"I know you're in a difficult position, John, and I don't want to make it any harder on you," she sighed. "Tommy's more than worth putting up with his mom and I trust you to deal with her."

"Thanks babe," he murmured. Her trust and belief in him meant everything. That and their family.

"I love you John," she told him.

"I love you Logan."

LATER THAT EVENING

They had finally managed to pry Chelsea away from Sheppard, on the condition that Mitchell and Ronon would not leave his side the whole time she was gone. Logan had convinced her to go for a walk on the East pier with her, Nic and the twins. She was nervous and jumpy at first, but Nic held onto her hand and kept her busy with non-stop questions about everything. When they reached the mid-way point, where they often went swimming with their mom, or Mitchell, they ran into Caldwell, who had gone out for a run. Nic and Chelsea took a seat on the stairs leading down to the water's edge while Logan conversed with Caldwell.

"How are you handling it all - _really_?" he stared at her.

"Honestly? All I care about is that John's back. He's home and we're re-building our life and our family. Tommy's a joy and I already love him - how could I not? So yeah, Yehra's like a little mosquito flitting around - annoying, but otherwise inconsequential. The kids love him and..."

A sudden splash cut her off in mid-sentence and they looked over to find both Chelsea and Nic gone.

"NO!" Logan cried, running to the edge of the pier. She could see two figures pop up out of the water and begin splashing around.

"I'm on it!" Caldwell said as she turned a stricken gaze to the twins.

He tore his shirt off and removed his boots, then dove off the pier and into the water near the children. Within moments he had both of them in his arms and he was swimming for the stairs that led back up to the pier. Logan was beside herself with worry and then anger. They had never once gone into the water without an adult accompanying them, or without asking permission first. What had gotten into them?!

An hour later, the children sat on Chelsea's bed in her room while Sheppard and Logan laid down the law, together.

"Both of you know better than to do something like that!" Sheppard scolded.

"Yes sir," they chimed in unison, eyes downcast.

"And what if General Caldwell hadn't been there to fish you out? Your mother was there, alone, with the TWINS!"

Neither of them said anything. What could they say? In fact, neither of them could give any kind of answer, let alone a good answer, as to why they had suddenly charged down the stairs and jumped into the ocean.

"You know how much we love you and that your safety means everything to your mother and I, and part of keeping you safe means you have to follow the rules."

"Yes sir," they chimed again.

"You really scared me," Logan chided them.

"We're sorry," they said in unison.

"There will be no repeat of this behavior, do we make ourselves clear?" Sheppard asked.

"Yes sir," they replied, their heads bobbing together.

Sheppard looked over at Logan, as if to ask if she had anything further to say. She shook her head negatively.

"Okay... Both of you are grounded tomorrow, and early bedtime tonight... Hit it," he said sternly.

Nic hit the ground running, and Chelsea meekly climbed under the covers on her bed.

Sheppard gave her a hug and kissed her gently on the forehead. "I love you, sweet-pea."

"I love you, too, Daddy."

Then Logan stepped in and did the same, "I love you, baby. Sleep tight."

"Love you Mommy," Chelsea said, then rolled over to face the wall.

They then went to Nic's room, where he was already waiting in bed for them to come in. Sheppard and Logan both hugged and kissed him goodnight, as they had with Chelsea.

"Love you, buddy," Sheppard told him.

"I love you, Nic, sleep sweet," Logan said.

"I love you guys," Nic replied.

Logan then went to check on the twins who, to her dismay, were wide awake and *talking* to one another across the room.

"What are you two doing up?" she asked wearily.

As she neared Scott's crib, she knew precisely why he was up. "Ooo-kaay, buddy, that answers THAT question!" she chuckled, picking him up and carrying him over to the changing table.

Sheppard watched her from the doorway, feeling his heart turnover as he watched her. For a moment, time seemed to turn back and it was Chelsea that she was tickling and cooing at. Then Cadence, seeing her mom with Scott, began to squawk and demand to be tended to.

"Okay, okay... I'll be right there."

"Need an extra set of hands?" Sheppard asked, coming all the way into the room.

She hesitated for a moment, then shrugged and motioned him over to Cadence. She watched him as he bent down and gently scooped her up into his arms, making faces at her in the process. Cadence was, as most girls usually were, utterly captivated by his face. She studied him intently as he laid her down on the other changing table and checked her diaper. Several times she reached out to touch his hair and she cooed whenever he looked her right in the eye. Logan thought back to a time when it was Chelsea in his arms, rather than Cadence, then looked away in case he happened to turn around, so he wouldn't see the pain in her eyes. Once the children were all squared away, and smelling fresh again, Logan went to put Scott back in his crib.

"Is... uh... Cam coming over to say goodnight?" Sheppard asked.

"He's already been here. He fed them and put them down... the first time..." she replied.

"Oh... so, he won't be popping by any time soon then..."

"Nope," she replied, taking Cadence from him and putting her back in her crib, then she quietly left the room.

Sheppard found her on the balcony. This had been the first time since his return that they'd actually been alone together, without any of the children around. He wrapped his arms around her from behind and she let out a deep sigh before resting her head against his chest. They didn't speak for several minutes, choosing instead to let the peace wash over and envelope them.

"This is nice," he finally said.

"Yes it is," she agreed.

"Alone at last," he whispered.

"Whatever can we do to fill the time?" she snarked. She knew what she wanted to do. What she'd wanted to do since finding him alive and well.

"I have a few ideas about that," he said, turning her in his arms to face him.

"Please enlighten me," she teased playfully.

He pulled her close and whispered several ideas in her ear, all of which made her smile, giggle and blush and all of which sounded absolutely heavenly.

"Ready when you are," she murmured.

He froze for a moment and looked her in the eye. "Are you sure?" he asked. "I know it's been a while, and things are... well.. complicated... I don't want to push, so if you're not ready..."

She stopped him with a hand over his mouth. "I love you John. I always have, I always will. Things only have to be complicated if we allow them to be and I've lost too much time with you already. I'm all in, Flyboy. Always and forever."

"Always and forever," he repeated before covering her mouth with a searing kiss that left both of them weak in the knees.

THE FOLLOWING MORNING

Sheppard had just stepped out of the shower when he heard a knock at the door. Wrapping a towel around his waist and donning his robe, he hurried out to answer it. Logan had left moments before to take Nic to school and the twins to the nursery. Chelsea had once again steadfastly refused to leave him and was playing in her room while he showered.

"Good morning, husband," she said.

He was instantly irritated. "Yehra... How many times do we have to go over this? I really don't want to hurt you, but I won't give you false hope either. And I do remember asking you never to intrude on my family home."

"Adahm..."

"JOHN! My name is JOHN!" he hissed.

"I am sorry... It does take some getting used to..."

"What are you doing here?!" he demanded. "Where's Tomas?"

"He sleeps," she shrugged dispassionately.

"And you left him ALONE, after what happened before?" he asked, referring to the time he wandered off on his own and Logan found him.

"He is but right across the way," she said defensively, indicating Rylin's quarters.

"What are you doing here?" he asked again.

"I thought we might...talk..."

"Talk about what?"

"Our future, of course."

"OUR future? As in...?"

"Yours and mine... and Tomas'" she added, almost as an afterthought.

"Yehra... WE...(pointing from her to himself) don't have a future. Not together, anyway. I will always be part of my son's life, but I will not be part of yours. I really thought I'd made that perfectly clear."

"I'd hoped you had changed your mind..." she trailed off, pushing past him and planting herself on the sofa.

"What?!" he squawked. "Why would I... How could you... what would make you... NO!" he stammered.

"She will come to see the truth," she said.

"The truth?"

"That you belong with me...with us..." she smiled serenely.

"You couldn't be more wrong," Sheppard corrected her. "You couldn't be more wrong about that if you tried."

"Husband..."

"Stop calling me that! I am not YOUR husband! I'm HERS, and hers alone. Got it? I belong to Logan, heart, mind, body and soul. Logan and only Logan! ALWAYS only Logan."

"She does not want you..."

"You're wrong about that too," he forced himself to bite back a smile of satisfaction, recalling all the ways Logan had shown him the night before just how much she wanted him - still.

"I can make you happy...Ada... John..."

"No, Yehra... you can't. And I can't give you what you want, so I will never make you happy either. I don't want to be cruel, but you need to hear me on this: I don't love you. I could never love you. For three years, even without my memories I couldn't love you because, even without my memories, I still loved Logan. Always only Logan. The sooner you accept that, the better off you'll be."

"Why can you not at least try?" she begged.

"What did I just _say_?!" he yelped.

"We were happy..."

"For the last time, no, we _weren't._ Please Yehra... don't put yourself through this, don't put our son through this."

"I would not hurt our son!" she protested.

"You ARE hurting him! Every time you try to force us into this picture you seem to have of familial bliss, you hurt him."

"No!"

"Yes. Please, stop... Think about _him_ , for a change. Accept that you and I have no bond beyond Tomas, and we never will."

Yehra looked up at him sadly. "I love you..."

"I'm sorry. Really. I'm sorry that you're hurting. You need to let go, so you can move on."

She shook her head and stood up to face him. "You will see."

Sheppard shook his head and backed away from her. He really hated having to hurt her this way, she had saved his life, after all. But he had never been one to lead anyone on, or give them false hope. As grateful as he was that she'd brought him back, he was almost equally as angry that she'd taken his memory from him for so long, especially since she knew that he already had a wife.

"I will show you..."

"My Daddy asked you to leave."

They turned to see Chelsea standing in the doorway to the hall. Ordinarily, Sheppard would have chastised her for speaking to an adult that way, but not this time.

"This is not a matter for young ones," Yehra hissed at her.

Sheppard immediately placed himself in front of Yehra, blocking her view of his daughter. "Don't," he eyed her warningly.

"I'm not afraid of you!" Chelsea told her as she came to stand next to Sheppard. "I know more than you think I do!"

That sounded like a warning, if not a threat. Sheppard put his arm around Chelsea and pulled her against him.

Yehra turned cold eyes on the child and smiled humorlessly. "Do you now?"

"Yehra," Sheppard growled.

"She dares much, this one," she told him. "Like her mother, no doubt."

"More than you know," Chelsea hissed, her eyes fixed on Yehra, full of cold steel. Every bit as intimidating as her mother could be when provoked.

"That's actually a compliment," Sheppard smirked, inwardly proud and a little scared of his daughter at that moment. "Now, I'll ask you once more, do not come here again. This is the home of my wife and I - along with our family and you do _not_ have a place here."

"We shall see," she murmured under her breath as she turned to walk away.

"I won't let you hurt my Daddy," Chelsea called after her.

Yehra froze for a moment, then slowly glanced back at her over her shoulder.

Chelsea could feel a sudden pressure pushing against her, but she held her ground. "Or my Mommy."

ATLANTIS ARBORETUM

"I do not know why she behaves thusly," Riateh shook her head sadly.

"You're nothing like her," Logan observed.

"She was not always as she is now. She has always been one of our strongest leaders. My people have ever looked up to her, for guidance and strength. Her gift is rare among our people."

Logan looked over at her. "The healing... you mean?"

"Yes... I... Colonel Devane..."

"Logan, please..."

"Logan, I cannot apologize or atone for all that Yehra has taken from you."

"YOU have nothing to apologize for, Riateh. What she did, she did alone, including taking it upon herself to heal my husband. For that, I owe her, and I will always be grateful."

"You are a most generous soul," Riateh smiled warmly.

"Hardly," Logan chuckled.

"I cannot fathom, given the kindness your people have shown us, why it is that Yehra has held so much back, concerning my people... Who we are."

Logan shrugged. "You are... the Ancients, are you not? At least some of you?"

Riateh looked at her in surprise. "She has told you this?"

Logan chuckled again. "No...No... John figured that out, once he got his memory back."

"I see."

"So?"

"We are... of the Ancients, as you say. We are descended from a race called the Alterrans. My people settled in this galaxy not long after the ones you call the Ancients came here."

"I understand there was some kind of...split... between two factions of your race. Those who thought they should be worshipped as Gods, and those who didn't believe in... interfering... in the lives of... lower life forms such as humans."

"Yes, that is true. My people, the Alterrans, were initially forced to follow those who believed they were Gods..."

"The Ori?"

Riateh shuddered at the mention of the name. "Yes... But they managed to escape, and they found their way here, where they rejoined their brothers and sisters and found peace."

"Lucky for them."

"Indeed. Not all the Ancients, as you call them, left this galaxy when the others went back to... Earth. Some of them were trapped, with no way to get back to Atlantis in time. I am descended of those."

"But not all of you are... Ancients..."

"As time passed, there were fewer and fewer of my people who were... true blood..."

"So they had to mix with humans, thereby diluting the bloodlines?"

"Yes... Little did we know, though, that the Ancient bloodlines continued to grow... among the humans..."

"Some of us have the Ancient gene that allows us to use Ancient technology..."

"Do you not understand, Logan?" Riateh studied her for a moment.

"Understand what?"

"It is more than a single gene that lives within you... Yehra recognized this, as did I, when we encountered your... John..."

"I... What do you mean?" Logan blinked at her.

"You do not simply have the Ancient gene, Logan... You ARE Ancient, just as I am, and Yehra, and some others among my people."

"I beg your pardon?"

"It runs truer in some of you than in others, but it is true. Your lineage is as pure as my own. So is John's. If there are as many peoples on Earth as you have said... The odds that all or nearly all of your ancestors being of pure Ancient... It is astronomical... Then for you to mate with another of so pure a bloodline..."

"My children?"

"They continue the line, unbroken."

Logan was dumbfounded. "Wow," was all she could manage.

As they rounded the corner, they ran into Mitchell, who was strolling the twins around the city. "Hey!" he called in greeting.

"Cameron..."

"What's wrong?"

"Wrong? I... uh... nothing!" she said, kneeling down to kiss her babies. "Are you having fun with Daddy?" she cooed.

"We're getting ready for a marathon," he quipped.

"Uh-huh..." she smiled and looked over at Riateh, who nodded almost imperceptibly to the unspoken question in her eyes.

"Cameron... You remember Riateh.".

"Of course, it's nice to see you again."

"And you..." she trailed off, looking at Logan.

"Cadence and Scott, you know as well."

"Yes. They _are_ beautiful children... The very image of their parents, too."

"Thank you," they chimed in unison.

"Uh... Cam... Riateh has been telling me some very interesting things... Care to tag along and hear about it?" she asked.

"Sure! We'd love to."

LATER THAT AFTERNOON

"Are you serious?" Sheppard asked.

"I'm serious... And I believe Riateh was serious. She's certainly been more honest and open with us than any of the others."

"So we've been wrong all this time about what it means to be an Ancient?" Weir asked.

"Maybe so," Beckett replied.

"It would certainly explain a lot," Caldwell mused, looking over at Sheppard.

"What?" Sheppard asked.

"For one thing, why some of you are better able to use and control ancient technology than others. I mean, as Ancients go, don't some of them have more... powers... than others?"

"I see where you're going with this, and yes... Some Ancients possess the ancient healing powers, while some do not. It stands to reason that the same would apply to other...talents...as well." Daniel explained.

They all turned to look at Sheppard and Logan curiously.

"Don't look at us!" they said in unison.

"Neither one of us has the ability to heal or anything," Logan added.

"How do you know?" Daniel asked.

"Daniel...I..."

"No, really... It's not something you've ever really tried to do before, so..." he trailed off.

"Maybe we should ask Riateh?" Mitchell suggested.

"You think she can just look at someone and know what gifts they have?" Weir asked.

"She might," Logan murmured.

"What?" Caldwell asked.

She paused for a moment. "She... knew the twins were... full blooded... the moment she saw them."

"Yeah, but she knew YOU were..."

"But not Cameron..." Carter pointed out.

All eyes turned to Mitchell.

"It was news to me, too," he shrugged.

"I thought you had the gene therapy," McKay said.

"I did...The way Riateh explained it to us... My genes or whatever were latent... or inactive, or _something_..."

"It sounds like we should be talking to Riateh, then," Weir said.

"Will she talk to us?" Caldwell looked at Logan.

She shrugged. "I don't see why not."

"Then let's call this a meeting until we're able to bring Riateh in," Caldwell said, getting to his feet.

As the meeting broke up, Sheppard pulled Logan aside and waited for the others to leave. "So, according to her, our kids are..."

"Full-blooded Ancients," Logan finished for him.

"And we... You and I?"

"Descended from a long, long, long line of full-blooded Ancients, making US full-blooded Ancients."

"Wow," he said shaking his head.

"Yeah."

"You...uh... You like her, don't you?" he asked.

"Actually, yeah, I do... She's honest and straightforward... She reminds me a lot of Shannon Caldwell."

He thought about that for a moment. "She is...kind of, isn't she?"

"She's probably the only one out of the bunch that I do feel comfortable with..." she trailed off, wanting to avoid any discussion involving Yehra.

"Even Tomas?" he asked lightly.

Logan smiled warmly. "Oh, nooooo... That little charmer is a joy to behold," she told him honestly.

"I'm glad you feel that way."

"You had to know that I would, John."

"I did... But given the circumstances..."

"Please...Let's not go there, okay? Tomas is an innocent in all of this, I could no sooner blame him than blame the twins... And YOU don't... harbor any bad feelings... about them, right?"

"Hell no, they're great!"

"Good...Then we need never speak of any of this ever again..."


	71. Chapter 71

Logan waited in the gate room, one hand on Chelsea and the other on Nic as they waited for the special surprise they were about to witness. There had been two weeks worth of frenzied activity; construction and the like, all leading up to this moment. The kids had no idea what was about to happen, but they knew it was big. Sheppard joined them a moment later, with Mike Simmons and the boys. Mitchell was up in the control room with the twins, watching from above with Riateh, who seemed just as excited as all the kids who were appearing around the room to witness what was coming. Suddenly, the gate activated and the wormhole engaged. Logan felt the kids tighten their grip on her hands and turned to smile over at Sheppard. He moved over to stand by them, holding Tomas in the crook of one arm and taking Nic's other hand in his.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Ready!" they chimed together.

Soon, a crowd of people, scientists by the look of them, started pouring through and then... All the kids gasped as first one then another dolphin was wheeled through the event horizon in front of them. There were people who were pouring water over them, to keep them hydrated.

"DOLPHINS!" Nic and Chelsea cried together.

"Doffin!" Tomas echoed his brother and sister excitedly.

They were quickly moved out to the balcony, where a crane had already been set up to lower them into the specially prepared enclosure in the water below. Two more dolphins came through, to the children's delight, and they watched in fascination as the same procedure was repeated.

"Took long enough," Sheppard murmured to Logan.

They had suggested this years before, after they had taken the kids to Sea World.

"What took them so long to approve this?" he asked her.

"I think it just got dropped for a while... with everything else that was going on... I'm glad they finally did it."

The kids began pleading to be taken down to the oceanic aquarium off the south pier, where the dolphins were being housed prior to one day being releasd into the wild. They were doing their best to put them off, but the kids were so excited, it was hard to get them to understand that the dolphins were somewhat stressed out by their intergalactic move, and they needed to rest and adjust to their new surroundings before they could entertain visitors. Just then, McKay came over, smiling like a kid himself, and asked the kids if they wanted to go down and get a closer look. Sheppard and Logan exchanged defeated looks and glared at McKay for getting the kids all amped up again.

"Rodney!" Sheppard growled.

"Nono, it's okay... They can see them through the observation window in the lab," he explained.

"Can we?" they pleaded together.

"Alright..." Sheppard relented.

Logan looked up at the control room and motioned for Mitchell to meet them downstairs. She was pleasantly surprised when Riateh accompanied him and the twins down to the aquarium, and grateful to have the extra hand to help juggle all five children.

The children were entralled, watching the dolphins swimming around in their new enclosure. They all had their little noses pressed up against the glass and giggled every time one of the dolphins came right up to them.

"Wanna swim with them!" Nic proclaimed.

"Ah... Not today, buddy," Sheppard told him.

"But..." Chelsea began.

"They just got here, and they need time to adapt. It's not like when you went swimming with the ones at Sea World," Logan cut her off.

Just then, the lead marine biologist walked in and greeted them. "Hi everybody!"

"Hello Dr. Martinez," Logan greeted. "Children, this is Dr. Martinez, and he's in charge of the new aquarium and research here."

"Hello Dr. Martinez," they chimed in unison.

"I see you like our new friends," he observed.

"YES!" they replied enthusiastically.

"Well, I'm about to go up and see if they'll eat anything... Would you like to come up and watch?"

"YES!" they squealed together, then looked up at Logan and Sheppard pleadingly.

They exchanged glances and Sheppard nodded. "Okay... But no noise, and I'm coming with you!"

They all followed Martinez up to the surface and stood back while he ran through a series of tasks before pulling out a large bucket of feeder fish. He invited the children to come closer, but Sheppard didn't want Tomas so close to the edge. Mitchell was holding Cadence and Riateh was holding Scott.

"I'll take him," Logan offered.

"You sure?" he asked.

"Yoyo," Tomas squealed happily, eagerly stretching his arms out to her.

"No problem" she smiled as Tomas wrapped his arms around her neck, then yawned sleepily and settled comfortably on her hip, thumb in his mouth, to watch his brother and sister.

Mitchell looked over at her and smiled in amusement. "Yoyo?" he whispered.

"He's having a bit of trouble with his L's," she shrugged. "Like Sam did at his age."

"Ah!" he grinned.

Within moments, the boy was fast asleep with his head resting on her shoulder.

"He seems quite taken with you," Riateh observed.

"The feeling's mutual," she smiled back. Who wouldn't love Tomas? He was a great kid.

"It is a shame he does not get this kind of attention from his mother," Riateh told them.

Logan's face clouded over and she rubbed his back comfortingly. "I... uh... Thought it was just my... personal feelings that..."

"Do not misunderstand," Riateh began. "Yehra does love the boy. She has wanted children for many, many years, and Tomas was the answer to her prayers."

"She sure doesn't act like it," Logan groused.

"I am afraid she has let her focus shift overmuch. When she began to realize that she might lose... John... She became..."

"Obsessed?" Mitchell supplied for her.

"Indeed. She has lost much of who she used to be, in her obsession."

"If she's not careful..."

"She has been counseled about this... It may take... time..." Riateh informed them.

"He knows... Tomas, I mean..." Logan said sadly.

"What?!" Mitchell asked, taken aback.

"He told me... That day I found him wandering the halls, he told me that his mother missed John, not _him_..." she trailed off as tears stung her eyes.

"Poor kid," Mitchell said through clenched teeth, holding a little more tightly to Cadence.

"She's missing... so much..." Logan said absently. She actually felt sorry for Yehra. It wasn't that she didn't understand her attraction to Sheppard - she got _that_. But to so completely ignore her own son? The child she'd apparently longed for and dreamed about for so long?

Mitchell looked down at her. "You know, seeing you, holding him like that... It's like watching you with Nic," he smiled at the memory of Nic at that age.

"He looks just like him, doesn't he?" she asked.

"It's uncanny."

Seeing how Tomas was getting to be quite heavy, dead weight really, in her arms, Mitchell found a chair for her to sit in, cradling the sleeping boy on her lap. They watched for a while longer, until the twins began to fuss.

"They're tired," Logan murmured. "I better go put them down..."

"I think you already have your hands full, Logan. I can go put them down for a nap," Mitchell said.

"I...uh...You're going to need help..."

"I can help, if that is alright with you?" Riateh offered.

Logan smiled up at her. "You don't mind?"

"Not at all," she assured her.

"Thank you. I appreciate that."

Mitchell had expected her to bristle at the offer, but she totally surprised him. He squatted down and let Logan kiss Cadence, and Riateh did the same with Scott. After they had gone, Sheppard ambled over to her, a lazy smile on his face.

"Where'd everybody go?" he asked, gently stroking Tomas' hair.

"The twins were due for a nap," she explained.

"Oh... And you let her... help?" he tried to sound casual.

"Sure, why not?"

"You're usually so... territorial... when it comes to the kids, I mean..."

"I told you, I trust her."

"It really doesn't bother you?" he eyed her speculatively.

"No...actually, it really doesn't..." she sounded somewhat surprised herself.

"Shall I take him for you?" he asked, squatting down beside her.

"Nah... He's okay. It'd probably just wake him up."

"Watching you with him... It's like seeing you with Nic, all over again," he said sadly.

"We were just saying that... He's so much like Nic, in so many ways."

"Daddy!" Chelsea called out.

"Uh-oh... Duty calls... You're sure you don't mind?" he asked.

"We're fine... This is... relaxing... for me."

Later that evening, Logan found herself alone with four very overstimulated children. Normally so well-behaved, Nic and Chelsea were literally bouncing off the walls. The twins were unusually fussy as well. She took a deep breath as Nic streaked, buck-naked, through the living room and back into his bedroom. Chelsea soon followed, ranting about Nic taking one of her dolls or something. She was holding onto Scott, and trying to wrangle Nic into the bathtub when she heard a knock at the door. Hoping that providence had stepped in and prompted Rylin to stop by and see if she was needed, she abandoned her efforts at getting Nic corralled and headed for the door.

She was surprised to find, not Rylin, but Sheppard standing there. She had locked the door, which had become SOP as a preventative against any children escaping and hadn't been expecting him back so soon. He took in her frazzled appearance at a glance and immediately stepped up.

"What the..."

Just then, buck-naked-Nic came flying through the room again, with Chelsea close behind. He wasn't sure whether to laugh or...

"Help?" she looked up at him pleadingly.

"Tell me he doesn't do that all the time now?" he said pointing at his son's naked rear as he ran through the room again.

"Well... He is YOUR son," she shrugged.

He did laugh out loud at that. "Well, yeah... But I don't generally run naked through the halls..."

"I seem to recall a time in our lives when you felt the same need to be just as... free..." she teased.

"Hey, I was what? Nic's age?" he countered.

"Actually, I was thinking about six or so years ago..." she said and sailed out of the room to answer Cadence's cries.

He stared after her, unable to speak for a moment as he thought back to the time before they had the children. He wasn't the only one of them who tended to hang out at home sans clothing during that time. In fact, any time they weren't on duty or required to be elsewhere, they had very little, if any, need for clothing. He shook his head, as buck-naked-Nic came streaking through the living room again.

"Attention on deck!" Sheppard barked, causing Nic to skid to a dead stop.

Nic pivoted and stood still, looking up at his father. A moment later, Chelsea appeared and took a place beside her brother.

"Now... What is all this chaos here?" he asked.

Twin pairs of emerald eyes looked up at him and both sets of shoulders shrugged at the same time.

"What say we give poor mom a break and behave the way you know you should?" he asked.

"Yes sir," they chimed together.

"Excellent. Cadet Nicolas Sheppard?"

"Sir?"

"Looks to me like you have personal cleaning detail right now?" he arched an eyebrow at his son.

"Yes, sir..." he replied dejectedly.

"Hit it," Sheppard motioned to the bathroom.

"Cadet Chelsea Sheppard?"

"Yes Sir?"

"What is it YOU are supposed to be doing right now?" he asked.

"Cleaning my room until Nic gets out of the bath."

"Hit it!" he pointed to her bedroom.

Both children did as they were told without further resistance. As much as she hated to admit it, Logan thought as she listened from the twin's room, there were just some times when a man's deep voice made all the difference. Not that the children ever really gave her a hard time, or that there was ever a time when she couldn't handle them, it was just nice not to HAVE to all the time. She settled into the rocker, a twin in each arm, and fed them their evening bottles as she rocked them. Now that it was quiet in their quarters, the twins were calming down nicely.

Sheppard supervised Nic's bath, making sure he scrubbed every last inch of his body, then made sure he got into his pajamas and settled down with a book while Chelsea took her turn in the bathtub. At five, she was getting a bit old for Sheppard to "help" her, but she wanted him to stay in there with her anyway. He sat on the toilet while she chattered on about school, her friends, the dolphins and nothing in particular. These times with his children meant the world to him; he had missed more than half of their young lives so far.

Once Chelsea was squared away, he tiptoed into the twin's room to find Logan sitting helplessly in the rocking chair. A sleeping twin in each arm. She hadn't wanted to move, fearful of waking one or both of them up. Sheppard came over and gingerly picked up Scott, then placed him in his crib, while Logan rose and gently placed Cadence in hers. She stood back for a moment, just to make sure they were still asleep, then quietly tiptoed out of the room, Sheppard close behind her, and closed the door. Breathing a huge sigh of relief, she turned to look up at him.

"Where's Nic and Chels?" she asked.

"Reading... In their rooms..."

Logan gaped up at him in surprise. "What'd you do? Give 'em cough medicine?" she teased.

"Nah... I think the bath calmed them down quite a bit. Chelsea wore herself out talking..." he chuckled.

"She gets that from you," Logan teased and walked down the hall toward their respective rooms.

Before she reached the door, the radio crackled to life and she heard Kestler's voice.

"Colonel Devane to the control room, please?"

She stopped dead in her tracks and cursed lightly under her breath. "I better go get..."

"I'll stay with them," Sheppard said. "Go."

"But..."

"Hey, the hard work is already done, we'll be fine, no need to bother Rylin. Go."

Logan kissed him, lightly on the mouth. "I'll be home soon," she said, and headed for the door.

Sheppard watched her go, a huge smile on his face. Yep. Life was good.

Logan quickly took care of business and was on her way back to her quarters when... _something._.. told her to go down to the aquarium. She couldn't put her finger on it, but she felt the urgent need to get down there as quickly as possible. She headed for the nearest transporter and then sped down to the aquarium as fast as she could.

She didn't see anything out of the ordinary at first, and there was no one around. Everything was dark and quiet, except for the dolphins, who had begun splashing around and crying out. Logan went up to the surface pool to see what the fuss was all about. When her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she scanned the area around the pool, then the pool itself. She gasped in horror at what she saw there. On the other side of the pool, a small body was being held up, near the edge of the pool, by the nose of one dolphin.

"Tommy!" she screamed, kicking off her shoes and diving into the pool.

The dolphin held the boy above the water until she reached him, then swam out of her way. Logan turned him over and checked his breathing. His face was a little blue, and she couldn't hear him breathing. She got him to the edge and lifted him onto the side, then climbed out and began checking him over more thoroughly. He wasn't breathing and he had no pulse.

"Nonononono baby!" she cried, and immediately began CPR. "Come on, baby!"

Her radio was fried from diving into the pool, so she looked around in between breaths and called for help. Finally, one of the technicians heard her and she ordered him to call for a med team. He immediately ran for a radio and did as she asked. A moment later, Tomas began to sputter and cough, water streaming out of his mouth and nose as he did, then he began to cry. Logan held him tightly against her, tears streaming down her face.

"It's okay, baby... I'm here... You're okay, you're okay..." she cooed.

Tomas clung weakly to her, still coughing. "Yoyo..." he croaked.

"Yes, baby, I'm here..."

The med team arrived and she went with them to the infirmary to explain to Beckett what had happened. She ordered one of the nurses to send word to Sheppard, and to Rylin, so she could watch the children. One of them handed her a dry set of scrubs, which she quickly changed into before going back to Tomas' side. Within minutes, Sheppard burst into the infirmary and scanned the empty beds, looking for his son. Logan waved him over from the bed at the end.

"Tommy?" he asked.

"He's okay... He's okay," she assured him as he wrapped his arms around her.

"What happened?" he asked, his heart pounding.

"He was in the dolphin pool," she explained.

"What? He doesn't know how to swim!" Sheppard cried.

"He... what?" she looked up at him in shock.

"There were no lakes or oceans... And I didn't..." he trailed off, guilt and anguish in his eyes.

"There was a dolphin in there, who... helped him..." she told him.

"It what?" he asked, confused.

"When I got there, it was keeping his head above the water, with its nose..." she explained.

"Why... Why were you there?" he asked. "Is that where they called you to...?"

"No...I...just...Something told me to go there..." she explained.

"You saved him..." he squeezed her tightly against him.

"That she did, lad." Beckett informed them. "If she hadn't gotten to him when she did..." he trailed off meaningfully.

"Thank you..." he murmured. "Thank you, thank you, thank you," he said and kissed her fervently.

"He's going to be...okay...right, doc?"

"He's still not out of the woods completely, we need to make sure all the water has drained from his lungs, to avoid a secondary drowning, but...he's one lucky little boy."

"Can we stay with him?" Sheppard asked.

"I wouldn't even try to keep you away," he assured them.

Logan held his trembling body, unconsciously rubbing his back and, alternately, stroking his hair. She hadn't seen him so scared since the children had been kidnapped by the Genii years before.

"What was he doing there? Alone?" Sheppard murmured, to himself more than to her.

"I don't know..." she replied.

"He was sleeping, when I left... He was with Yehra..."

"This is not your fault, John," she said, taking his face in her hands and looking him right in the eye.

"I should have taken him with me..."

"He was _sleeping_ ," she reminded him. "And he was with Yehra."

"She doesn't... Yehra hasn't been watching him very carefully... You know that as well as I do."

"Do you want me to send someone to wake her?" she asked.

"Honestly? NO! But she has the right to..." he shrugged, clearly not wanting to deal with Yehra right now.

All he wanted was to be there, with his son, and with Logan. A moment later, Mitchell came in, followed by Teal'c.

"We heard what happened... Is he okay?" Mitchell asked.

"He seems to be," Logan told them.

"Thanks to Logan," Sheppard added.

"Indeed. We heard this as well," Teal'c smiled and bowed to Logan.

"I'm off-duty now, I can take the twins tonight, or all of the kids, if you need me to," Mitchell said.

"I..." she looked at Sheppard before turning to Mitchell. "I'd really like to stay with Tommy, if you don't mind?"

"Not at all, whatever I can do to help."

"Yoyo..." Tomas croaked, trying to sit up.

Logan reached into the bed and picked him up. "Shhhh... it's okay, baby..." she cooed.

Sheppard began rubbing his back. "Hey there pal, you gave Daddy quite a scare..." he murmured.

"Dadda...Yoyo..." he coughed.

Daniel came in then, quickly looking around and seeing that everything was under control. "Everyone alright?" he asked.

They all nodded.

"Cam... The twins are asleep..."

"Nic and Chels, too," Sheppard added.

"You might as well just stay there, rather than taking them all back to..." she trailed off.

"No prob," he assured her.

Tomas was getting more and more relaxed in Logan's arms, a sure sign that he was falling asleep again. She turned and looked questioningly at Sheppard, who nodded and leaned down to kiss the top of his son's head. Logan held him a moment longer, trying to reassure herself that he was, indeed, alright before putting him back into bed. Suddenly, the door opened and Yehra strode in. Her expression changed from one of concern to one of utter fury at the sight of Logan holding her son in her arms, and Sheppard's hand on Logan's back.

"Take your hands _off_ my son!" she demanded furiously.

"Maybe if you..." Sheppard began angrily.

"No... It's okay, John..." Logan stopped him with a hand on his arm.

Yehra snapped at that. Out of the corner of her eye as she placed Tomas gently on the bed, she saw Yehra reach out and grab the zat from the gunbelt of the S.O. who had escorted her to the infirmary. She instinctively pushed Sheppard out of the way, and stepped in front of the bed holding Tomas, who would have been hit by the blast. The blast hit her, full-force, and she crumpled to the floor.

"NOOOOO!" Sheppard screamed.

Mitchell tackled Yehra to the floor as she prepared to fire a second blast at Logan, and the zat went skidding across the floor. Yehra screamed hysterically as Mitchell and Daniel subdued her and Teal'c retrieved the weapon. Sheppard knelt by Logan's side, then picked her up and placed her on the bed next to Tommy's. The S.O. handcuffed Yehra and began dragging her, kicking and screaming, away. All the noise woke Tomas, who began to scream in terror.

"My son... My family..." Yehra screamed. "You leave them alone!"

"Get her out of here!" Sheppard ordered, standing between Logan and the screaming Tomas.

Mitchell stepped forward and picked up the terrified child. He whispered and cooed reassuringly to the boy until he began to calm. Beckett came running a moment later.

"What happened?" he asked, horrified.

"Logan...She..."

"Logan Devane was hit by a blast from a zat-nik'a'tel," Teal'c explained.

Beckett looked down at her and shook his head as he examined her. "It never fails... Any time one or both of you is in here..." he muttered. "Who shot her?" he looked around.

"Yehra," Sheppard replied icily.

"She could have hit the wee one!" Beckett cried.

"She almost did... If Logan hadn't moved in front of his bed..." Daniel began.

Beckett finished checking her over, then re-checked Tomas. He pronounced them both alright and ordered everyone to leave, so they could both rest. Mitchell handed Tomas back to Sheppard and promised to take good care of the kids while they were gone. Sheppard reached up and placed a hand on Mitchell's shoulder, looking him right in the eye.

"Thank you, man... Really."

"You bet," Mitchell smiled, patting his hand reassuringly.

When everyone had gone, Sheppard pulled a chair over between the two beds and sat down, cradling Tomas in his lap.

"Yoyo?" the boy croaked, pointing weakly at Logan.

"She's okay, buddy, just sleeping."

He yawned and rested his head against Sheppard's chest. "I seep too," he announced.

"Good idea," he murmured, kissing the top of his head, and rubbing his back.

He never took his eyes off the still, unconscious form lying in the bed next to him. She had saved his son twice in one night. His son by another woman. Proving, he thought, what he'd already known forever: She would love and care for any child of his, no matter what the circumstance.

Logan finally began to stir a few hours later. She rolled slightly to her side and began to mumble incoherently. Sheppard reached out and squeezed her hand, just to let her know she wasn't alone. She let out a heavy sigh, as his hand closed around hers and mumbled again, something he understood this time.

"John..."

She was still fast asleep, but he was happy to see that he was still a player in her dreams. He let his head fall back against the chair and closed his eyes. In moments he, too, was fast asleep. Some time later, Logan woke up when she felt a tugging on the blankets covering her bed. She was still quite dazed, and wasn't really sure where she was.

"Yoyo?"

Her eyes popped open in time to see Tomas climb up on the bed next to her.

"Yoyo?"

"Here baby," she weakly held her arms out to him.

He climbed under the covers with her and settled comfortably into the crook of her arm. She placed her other arm protectively over his little body and rested her cheek against his head.

"Dada seep," he whispered.

"Mmmm-hmmm...Tommy should sleep too," she murmured softly.

"N'kay... Tommy seep Yoyo?" he asked.

"Sure thing baby...Shhhh now... Let's not wake Daddy."

Beckett came in later to check on them and found the three of them asleep that way, but he didn't have the heart to wake them, so he left them alone, and gave the staff orders that they were not to be disturbed.

Sheppard woke first, and seeing Tomas tucked snugly and securely in Logan's embrace made his heart turn over. This was the way it should have been all along. Logan should have been his mother. She was already more of a mother to him than Yehra had been in the last year. He knew he still had to deal with her, with what she had done, but he couldn't seem to tear himself away from Logan and Tomas.

The boy woke up as Sheppard stood up and stretched his arms and legs. "Dada?" he called to him.

"Shhhhh, come here buddy," Sheppard picked him up and sat on the other bed, putting Tomas on his lap. "Let's not wake up Logan, okay?"

"Yoyo seepy?"

"Yes, son, very sleepy."

"I eat?" he asked.

"You're hungry?"

"Yes hungee!" he said, accompanied by a loud rumbling in his tummy.

"Well, that's a good sign... What say we see about getting you some breakfast?"

"Good," he whispered.

Sheppard stepped out into the hall and flagged down one of the nurses, asking her to have some food brought for Tomas. While he had his back turned, Logan's eyes popped open and she bolted upright. The sudden, quick movement cause a wave of pain and dizziness and she cried out, grabbing her head and falling back against the pillow.

"John!"

Sheppard spun around, putting Tomas down in the nearest chair and hurried to her side.

"Logan? I'm here... What's wrong, Sparks?"

"The baby?" she asked, trying to look around.

"He's okay, he's fine..." he assured her.

"Yehra..."

"Locked up. Everything is alright now, I promise."

"The kids?" she asked.

"They're fine, too. Cam's with them... Try to relax..."

She looked over at the bed next to her. "Where's Tommy?"

"Here!" he called out from the chair by the door.

"Hey sport!" she smiled.

"Hungee Yoyo?" he asked.

"Not right now, baby... But you should eat," she said.

"Nurse get," he said simply.

"Ah... Room-service," she grinned.

The nurse came in, carrying a tray loaded with food, and set it down on a small table on the other side of the room.

"Yay! Food!" Tomas called out.

Sheppard went over to get him situated and then left him happily munching on waffles while he came back to Logan's bedside. He noticed the tears forming in her eyes as she looked over at Tomas.

"He's fine... Thanks to you..." he assured her.

"She could have... if she'd hit him with that zat..." she began crying softly, burying her face in her hands so Tomas wouldn't hear her. Sheppard sat on the bed and gathered her into his arms, holding her tightly against his chest.

"She didn't, because of you. You protected him... Now, she's paying the price..."

"I dunno, Johnny... How can I blame her?" she asked.

"What? How can you..."

"If I had walked in on her, snuggling with one or more of MY children... I can't say that I might not have done worse."

"Logan...You would never put a child at risk... Any child, much less one of ours...No matter HOW mad you got. She didn't even care that her own son was caught in the crossfire..."

She pulled back and looked up at him, unconsciously reaching out to stroke his stubbled cheek. "Are you okay?" she asked.

"I'm fine... Now..."

"You sure?"

"Yeah..." his head dipped and he quickly captured her lips with his own, branding her with a searing kiss.


	72. Chapter 72

Beckett had pronounced both her and Tomas well enough to return to their respective quarters, but with Yehra currently in a holding cell, she wouldn't be available to care for him. Logan had to bite her tongue to keep from commenting that she hadn't exactly been doing a bang up job of caring for him since their arrival in Atlantis. Instead, she enthusiastically agreed that of course he should come stay with them. He was, after all, Sheppard's son and sibling to her own children, and she had been taken off-duty for the next two days. They had plenty of room and she had plenty of time to help him become acclimated to their home.

Since Sheppard still had to deal with Yehra - not something he was eager or inclined to do right away - he put it off in favor of getting Tomas settled in his new home. Sheppard put Nic in charge of helping Tomas settle into the room they would now share, though from the looks of it, the boy already felt quite at home there.

Mitchell had been in the process of bathing the twins, in an effort to have them fresh, clean and dressed before Logan arrived, but he hadn't quite made it. He handed one wet twin to Sheppard, his eyes pleading for help, and insisted that Logan at least sit down and rest while they took care of everything. Sheppard followed Mitchell to the twin's room, and between the two of them, whose former camaraderie genuinely appeared to be resuming, they got the twins dried, dressed and content in their little bouncers. Logan was immensely pleased to see the two of them reforging the bond they had shared before.

Mitchell had done a good job of keeping the asylum, as she affectionately referred to their home, in order while they were gone. It didn't necessarily surprise her, as he had always been highly organized, but things had been so hectic the night before.

The city-wide suddenly crackled on and broke the peaceful, happy familial moment.

"Colonel Sheppard to the detention area."

His eyes locked on Logan's and he knew that he couldn't put off the confrontation any longer. Logan smiled gamely and shrugged.

"Yehra?" Mitchell asked.

"Yeah... Best to get it over with, I suppose," Sheppard replied.

"Need a wingman?" he asked.

Sheppard paused for a moment, then looked over at Mitchell and smiled. "You know...I probably do..."

"Let's do it," Mitchell clapped him on the back.

Each of them gave the kids a hug and a kiss, then turned and waved at Logan as they headed for the door.

"Be back soon," Sheppard called out.

"Take your time, we're fine here."

She felt tears sting her eyes as they left. But, for once, they weren't tears of sadness or pain. They were tears of happiness. Sheppard and Mitchell really were finding their way back to the friendship they'd shared before, and that was better for everyone, especially the children.

As Sheppard and Mitchell made their way down to the detention area, Sheppard was momentarily pulled aside by one of the Alterrans. He waved Mitchell on, who was only too happy to confront Yehra on his own. When the door opened, Yehra jumped to her feet, anticipating the arrival of Sheppard, but she was greatly disappointed to see Mitchell instead.

"They told me Adahm would be coming... I heard them call him..."

"Adahm... You mean JOHN, right?" he needled her.

"Yes, yes... Where IS he?" she demanded.

"He'll be along shortly."

"When?" she demanded impatiently.

"When he's ready... He's had to... you know... make arrangements for your son... Whom, I understand, you haven't even asked about all night...?"

To her credit, she did look appalled at herself. "How... is he?"

"Your son?"

"Yes!" she snapped.

"Sorry, I had to make sure, since the only HE you seem to be interested in is John Sheppard..."

"How is my son?" she asked irritably.

"He's fine... _now_... Although, if Logan hadn't done what she did, TWICE, your son might be dead right now..."

"No!" she cried.

"Did you even know that Logan was the one who pulled him out of the water and saved his life?"

Her face took on a very sour expression. "No..."

"It's true. She was on her way back to her quarters and SOMETHING, we'll call it a 'mother's instinct,' just told her to go down there, and THAT is when she saw him in the water. She pulled him out, got him breathing again and made sure he was taken to the infirmary."

"I am... grateful... for _that_..." she admitted, an underlying tone of loathing in her voice. "But had she sent for me, I could have healed anything that ailed him!" she said defensively.

"She DID send for you, but guess WHAT?! You weren't where you were supposed to be! And where was THAT? In your quarters! And, had you been where you were supposed to be, your son wouldn't have gone off looking for his parents, or fallen into the water to begin with!"

"I... I... wasn't far..." she stammered.

"We know that, NOW. For all the good it did your son, since he managed to slip out - AGAIN - without you noticing. Let's see, where DID they find you? Dead asleep in adjacent quarters, with the whole seduction scenario all set up in case you managed to lure Sheppard away from his wife and family. A scenario, I might add, that never would have worked!" Mitchell barked.

"There was a time when..."

Mitchell held up a hand to stop her. "That time, if it _ever_ existed, has long passed. I've known John Sheppard for a long time, so I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt that he has told you, in no uncertain terms, that he is _not_ interested in pursuing a relationship with you, now or ever!"

"We have a son together..."

"And he has TWO children with the woman he has loved since birth, if not before that!" Mitchell bellowed.

"A woman you, yourself, bedded during the time he was gone!" she pointed out.

"And I know, better than anyone, the strength of the bond they shared. The bond they ALWAYS shared, and the bond they will ALWAYS share for the rest of time!" he said, not even bothering to disguise the pain in his voice. "Yes, I loved her, I did for a long, LONG time, but I know exactly where I stand in all this... do _you_?"

"I am his wife..." she cried.

"No, you're NOT... You never were. No more than I was her husband. Not in any legal terms, and certainly not in her heart. That's where John lives, now and forever...And his heart is where she lives. Circumstances brought us together one time - one time, Yehra. Against all odds, we managed to conceive our twins - that should be familiar to you, since you were only bedded by John ONE time. But I love and respect her enough to let her go and find a way to parent our kids without asking for anything more. If you love John as much as you claim you do... You need to do the same. For the sake of your son, if not your own."

SHEPPARD QUARTERS

"Mommy?"

Logan smiled at her eldest daughter. "Yeah, Sweet-pea?"

"I don't think you should talk to that lady again. Ever."

She felt her stomach clench. She knew exactly who Chelsea was referring to and she didn't like any of this touching her children in any way. "She is Tommy's mom, Chels..."

"She doesn't act like it," Chelsea countered. Far wiser than her five years should allow for. "She doesn't care about him, not really. She just wants Daddy and... and..."

"And what, baby?" Logan prodded.

"She's going to try and hurt you again."

She blinked a few times, trying to come up with any words of wisdom to impart to her young, though highly perceptive child. She couldn't argue her point - she knew damn well that Yehra would just as soon kill her as look at her. She was every bit as obsessed with Sheppard as Gere had been with her and they all knew how much that obsession had cost them.

"Daddy's going to do everything he can to get her the help she needs, baby. Her heart is sick right now, and that can make a person do crazy things. But she's Tommy's mom, and he loves and needs her just as much as you, Nic and the twins love and need me and Daddy. I know all of this scares you and I know you want to help and try to protect us, but that's our job, Chels. Mine and Daddy's. It's our job to protect you kids, not the other way around."

"You should be Tommy's mom," she declared.

Logan smiled at the thought. "I would love that - so much. But he has a Mom, Chels, and you need to remember that. It would make Tommy very sad to hear anyone talk badly about her."

"Tommy loves you," she shrugged. "Like a Mommy, I mean."

"That's very nice to hear, and I love him too. But I couldn't steal him from his own Mom. Do you know how I would feel if someone tried to steal any of you from me?"

"Bad," she nodded.

"So, we need you to be kind, baby. Remember how you would feel if anyone said bad things about me or Daddy. Remember that your brother loves his Mommy and there's nothing wrong with that. "

"What if _she's_ the one making him feel bad?"

ATLANTIS BRIG

"Hi kids," Sheppard said as he walked through the door.

Mitchell smiled and turned around to see Sheppard enter the room. Yehra was much more subdued than she'd been when Mitchell first arrived. She could see, finally, the contempt in Sheppard's eyes. Contempt for _her_! Everything Mitchell had said to her was true. She had been behaving abominably, and she knew it, but she couldn't seem to stop herself. She had horribly disregarded her son, a child she had desperately wanted and yearned for, for so long.

She'd already been beyond furious to learn that Sheppard had been with Logan, while she'd waited for him in the spare quarters next to her own, in the hopes of seducing him back to her bed, but then when she saw Logan Devane holding HER son in her arms, Sheppard at her side... Everything had gone... red! All she wanted was to be rid of her nemesis, her rival, and she would have done anything at that moment to be rid of her.

"I'll...uh...leave the two of you alone to talk," Mitchell said.

Sheppard stopped him, with a hand on his shoulder. "No, please stay."

"You sure?" Mitchell asked.

"Yeah... I'm not sure I trust myself ALONE with her..."

"I'll just...be over there then," Mitchell said, pointing to the far corner of the room.

"Adahm..." she began.

"JOHN!" Mitchell and Sheppard snapped in unison.

"Please...I can explain..." she pleaded.

"Really?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Yes, I..."

"You can explain why it is that you left our son alone, AGAIN, so that he could wander the halls unattended and get into a position that very nearly killed him?"

"I..."

"And you can explain WHY you pointed a dangerous weapon, one that most likely WOULD kill a small child like him when fired at him?" he asked angrily.

"I did not fire the weapon at _him_!" she protested.

"He was directly in your line of fire!" Sheppard countered.

"I...did not see..." she stammered.

"He was RIGHT THERE, Yehra! Right in front of you! If Logan hadn't thrown herself in front of him, you would have hit him instead of Logan!"

"No!"

"Yes! That was the second time in one night that she saved our son, from dangers that YOU put him in!"

"She is... always... in the way..." Yehra sobbed.

"And you know what? She always will be. How many times do I have to tell you that?"

"I cannot bear her... coming between us... Trying to take my place..."

"It was never YOUR place! Never!" he lowered his voice to spare Mitchell what he was about to say. "She didn't come between us because there is no US! She was there FIRST, Yehra. Hear me, for once! She is my first, last and ALWAYS! She is the only woman I will ever love... EVER!" he hissed. "Always only Logan."

"But she gave herself to... _him._.." pointing at Mitchell.

"Because she thought I was dead and she was out of her mind with grief and pain! A belief you encouraged, by the way, when you knew I was already married!" he seethed.

"I gave you back your life," she murmured.

"Yes... Yes, you did, and I am grateful for that, I really am. Do you know why?"

She shook her head.

"Because of _her_... Because of my _children_... I am grateful that you healed me because it means I get to be with THEM!"

"I did not mean to... our son..."

"I know you love Tomas, Yehra... But you have not acted like it since coming here. HE knows that, too. Did you know that he knew you cared more about me than you do about him?"

"NO! I love my son!" she cried.

"Then _act_ like it! Get over this obsession of yours. It has already cost you my respect and your freedom, do you really want it to cost you your son?"

"No!"

"You needn't be so cruel!"

Sheppard spun around to find Busek standing behind him in the open doorway. Mitchell put his hand on his zat, just in case.

"No?! Are you even _aware_ of why she's in this cell?" Sheppard asked.

"I understand there was some sort of misunderstanding between..."

"She nearly killed our son, Busek! Get your facts straight before you start defending her!" Sheppard bellowed.

"She would never harm her own son!" Busek said.

"She left him alone, AGAIN, and he almost drowned. Then she aimed and fired a weapon at Logan, with our son directly in the line of fire. I'd call that harming him!"

Busek looked at Yehra, who was sobbing uncontrollably. "This...is true?" he asked.

"Yes, it's true!" Sheppard snarled.

"Then she was out of her head, not in control of her actions..."

"No kidding!" Sheppard barked.

"This has something to do with the Devane woman..."

"You mean my _wife_? The woman she stole me from? The one she allowed to believe that I was dead?"

"Yes..."

"The woman who saved HER (pointing at Yehra) son's life TWICE in one night?!"

"She..." he looked over at Yehra, who was becoming angry with every mention of Logan's name. "Please... allow me to speak with her... alone?" he asked.

"Sure. Take all the time you need!" Sheppard smiled, motioning to Mitchell. "I really have nothing more to say to her."

"No...please... _Adahm_!" she screamed.

"JOHN!" Sheppard and Mitchell called back in unison.

As they walked out the door, Mitchell nudged him and shook his head. "I gotta hand it to you man, when they fall for you, they do fall hard!"

"But why do I get all the whack-jobs?!" he asked.

"Are you calling Logan a whack-job?" Mitchell teased.

Sheppard arched his eyebrow at Mitchell. "No... But you _have_ seen her when she's REALLY pissed..."

Mitchell froze in mid-stride, his eyes widening as he thought about it. "Good point."

TWO WEEKS LATER

Mitchell wearily made his way to his quarters after a long, two-day mission off-world. He checked his watch, wondering if it was still early enough to go check on the twins, but he saw that it was just too late, and all the kids would be in bed by now. He missed them terribly, but he knew he couldn't go barging in on Logan and Sheppard at this hour.

"Colonel Mitchell?" a soft voice called out to him.

"Riateh," he smiled. "What brings you down here?" he asked.

"I was restless, so I decided to take a walk. You are up late."

"I just returned from an off-world mission," he explained.

"I see... I had wondered where you'd gotten to," she smiled.

"You did?" he asked, pleased that she had thought of him at all.

"I noticed you were no longer around, yes," she blushed.

"Oh," he smiled awkwardly.

"I was afraid you might have come to blame all of us, for the actions of Yehra..." she admitted.

"I would never do that," he told her. "What she did, she did on her own. The rest of your people have given us no cause for concern, you, least of all."

"I am glad you feel that way."

"Well, I'm glad you're glad," he smiled warmly at her.

"Your family is well?" she asked.

"Last I heard... I haven't seen the twins in over two days."

"You must miss them terribly."

"I do," he admitted openly.

She stared at him thoughtfully for a few moments before speaking. "Yehra's deeds did more damage than she ever intended."

"That may be true, but she still did what she did knowing full well that the man she wanted was already spoken for."

"I do not defend her," she assured him.

"I didn't think you would," he smiled reassuringly.

She looked like she had a lot on her mind, and suddenly, he didn't feel quite so tired anymore. "Would you like some company... on your walk?" he asked tentatively.

"I would, thank you, if you are not over-tired?"

"I'm fine," he assured her. "Shall we?" he asked, offering his arm for support.

She gently eased her hand through the crook of his arm and began walking with him. Riateh had not been able to put him out of her thoughts for several weeks now, and she had not only noticed his absence the past two days, but had missed his presence more than she cared to admit. She hadn't wanted to involve herself with any man who was still emotionally attached to another woman, but she had been drawn to him since the day they met. There was a kindness and a nobility in his eyes that she'd been unable to resist, as much as she tried. And Logan was someone she considered a friend. Someone she hoped would be a great friend, for many years to come. Despite the circumstances she found herself in, with the return of her presumed dead husband, Riateh felt that Mitchell still belonged to Logan, in a sense, and she wished to have no part in hurting her new friend, however unintentionally it may be.

In the past few weeks, she had learned much about the connection between Logan and Sheppard. Heard and seen it. Whenever one of them looked at the other, that connection was vividly apparent. They were soulmates. Mated for life, no matter what had been thrown in their path. Their hearts knew it. Their souls knew it. Everyone in Atlantis knew it, including Mitchell. She had felt his pain, at first, and his joy at having his friend back. The awkward situation they all found themselves in - mainly due to Yehra's machinations - hung over them - at first - but she was impressed at how quickly they had managed to regain the friendship they had once shared. Mitchell's resolve and, primarily, his nobility had won her over completely. She knew she dared not hope to compare to Logan, in his mind or his heart, for he had loved her for a very long time, but there was a part of her that did hold onto the hope that maybe one day, Cameron Mitchell might look at HER and feel as she was beginning to feel.

For his part, Mitchell found himself surprisingly relaxed and comfortable with Riateh. She was quite lovely, and very understanding. She had a great sense of humor, and seemed to *get* all of his jokes. Mostly, she just made him feel better when she was around. She was very easy to talk to, as well. And Logan seemed to like and trust her, which meant there would be no problem with her if Riateh were around the twins... on occasion.


	73. Chapter 73

"Will you never learn, Yehra?"

"Please Dear Busek... Tell me YOU have not turned against me, too?"

He shook his head sadly. "I have not."

"The others...The council...They have all turned against me... Adahm will never..."

Busek drew a deep breath and held up his hand. "Yehra, STOP!" he pleaded. "I beseech you."

"What is it?" she blinked at him in confusion.

"You know his name is John... John Sheppard," he admonished her.

"He will ever be Adahm, to me..." she smiled wistfully.

"That man does not exist. He never did. You _must_ accept that."

"How can I? That would be like ripping the heart from my body!" she cried.

"Even though he has asked it of you? This man you claim such devotion for. You will not respect him enough to address him by his own name? And Yehra... You have not even asked..."

"Yes, yes... How is my son? Does he miss me?" she sighed.

"Tommy, as they have all taken to calling him, is well."

"And does he miss me?" she persisted.

How to tell her the truth? That the boy barely remembers her at this point? He could not be so cruel to reveal that truth. "I am sure he does. But he is happy and well taken care of."

"Adahm is a good father."

"Yes, _JOHN_ is a good father, and a good man. He has great love for his family..."

At that Yehra broke into a wide grin. "You see? He _does_ love me..."

"No Yehra. I told you, his love is reserved for _his_ family. His children, ALL of them, and his wife, _LOGAN_."

A thunderous expression came over her face at the mention of Logan's name. "No..."

"You will never be free or happy if you do not find a way to deal with this and move on, Yehra. I do not want that for you. You must let go of this obsession. Mend your heart and your mind, healer. Return to who you were before. Do you not care... Do you not want to see your son grow into manhood?"

"Of course I do..." she cried. "I love my son!"

"Then prove it! Heal yourself, Yehra! Begin the work of letting go this obsession and allow yourself to heal; to open yourself to the possibility of a future."

"It is so... difficult...Without Adahm..." she trailed off, her eyes glazing over.

" _JOHN_!"

"...I have no reason to..."

"STOP! Your _son_ is your reason to get well. Your son is your reason for going on!"

"Does he ask for me?"

"Yehra..." he shook his head. He knew she was asking about Sheppard and not Tommy.

Something in his eyes sent a chill down her spine and she snapped to attention. "Who is caring for my son? His father..."

"Yes, his father," he said evasively.

"She does not... _She_ does not come near him... TELL ME!"

"They ARE husband and wife, Yehra..." he trailed off meaningfully.

"But, she has... discarded him...She pushes him away..." she said desperately.

"No... Never. That will never happen. They are true soulmates, Yehra. You have seen for yourself that not even his supposed death could sever the connection they have."

She screamed, fury in her eyes. "NOOOOOOOOO!"

"Accept it, old friend. There is nothing you can do to change who they are to one another. To persist in this madness merely serves to hurt everyone - even yourself - and especially your son."

"I will _not_ yield, Busek! She _cannot_ have him!" she cried.

"Him? To which him do you refer?" he arched an eyebrow at her, knowing full well which _him_ she meant.

"Adahm..."

"Of course... And THAT is why you will never be free of this prison," he paused to indicate the cell she was residing in. "THAT is why you will never be a part of your son's life. THAT is why he will one day look to Logan as his mother..."

"NOOO!" she shrieked.

"Yes!" he pushed, trying to shock her back into some semblance of sanity.

"She has ruined _everything_..." Yehra sobbed.

"It was not she who ruined lives, old friend. I am sad to say that it was YOU who ruined them. Several, all at once. You have wanted children for as long as I can remember, and yet you toss the beautiful son you were blessed with aside... all in pursuit of a man who does not and will not ever love you. You have ruined everything you have, Yehra. I am afraid you have no one to blame but yourself."

"It was...HER..." she protested.

"No, old friend. I have come to know her, quite well. She is not the villain you have convinced yourself she is. She is kind and loving and loyal and strong and incredibly, incredibly brave. I can... ANYONE can see the love they have for one another with a mere glance between them. She lavishes all the love your son deserves on him, as any true mother would. She loves him because he deserves it, and because he was born of the man SHE loves."

"I will not hear this!" she turned and walked away from him.

"You MUST hear this! Hear ME, Yehra. I want my friend back, whole and happy."

"You have gone over to HER side, Busek... She has tricked you as well. But I will not be deceived."

"No Yehra. I am your friend, and I ever shall be. But, I see the truth of things, and I will not let you sink further into darkness."

She turned away and paced around the cell. "Where is my son? Why has he not come to visit me?" she asked, a crazed expression on her face.

"He is... away..."

"Away... What do you mean?" she asked suspiciously.

"They have taken him, along with the older children, to their homeworld for a few days. A... vacation... I believe they called it."

"THIS is their homeworld..." she said, confused.

"Oh no... Their homeworld is called 'Earth.' They came here from there, in the hopes of finding the ancestors. You know this."

"She has taken my son?"

"THEY have taken him, together, on this trip. They will return soon."

"And you allowed her to take my son?!" she cried.

"His FATHER took him... I cannot and would not try to prevent his father from spending time with his son."

"Get out..." she said quietly.

"Yehra."

"GO!" she barked.

"Very well... But I will be back."

EARTH

"Wassat?" a wide eyed Tommy asked excitedly.

"That, son, is a..."

"FERRIS WHEEL!" Chelsea cut him off with her excited squeal.

"...Ferris wheel..." Sheppard finished.

"Wassat?" he asked again.

"Only one of the funnest things you can do here," Sheppard bent down, picked him up and swung him up to sit on his shoulders.

"You never said we was coming here!" Nic said exuberantly, eyes alight with excitement.

"Surprise!" Logan grinned.

"WOW!" Chelsea and Nic chimed together, taking in all the sights and sounds of the amusement park.

Although neither of them had ridden on a Ferris wheel before, they knew what it was, because each of them had a picture in their bedrooms of their parents standing in front of one. Sheppard had explained to them, in great detail what the thing was and how much fun it could be.

"First stop, Ferris wheel?" Sheppard asked.

"YAY!" cried the kids.

Sheppard rode with Nic and Tommy, while Logan and Chelsea rode together. When the ride first went up, Logan could hear Nic cheering excitedly that it almost felt like flying in a jumper. She laughed, but had to agree that it did almost feel like flying. Chelsea's eyes grew round as they neared the top and she could see everything for "miles". Together, she and Logan mapped out their next destination and the next and the next.

Several hours and many rides later, the family took a break and decided to grab a bite to eat before trying out any more rides. Though he was fighting it, they could tell Tommy was already exhausted. They picked a quiet place and managed to get some food into him before he finally succumbed to sleep. The rest of them took their time eating, so it would give Tommy a chance to sleep before they headed out into the park again.

"You remember Disneyland?" Sheppard was shocked at Chelsea's declaration.

"Sure!" Chelsea said.

"You were all of two years old, sweetie..."

"I know but... it really wasn't _that_ long ago... Plus we have all the pictures AND we found Uncle Mike there, remember?" she asked.

"I remember," he chuckled.

"Are we going back there?" Nic asked hopefully. He didn't remember their previous trip, except for what he saw in the pictures.

"Not this trip, buddy. We don't have quite enough time, but we can next time, if you want."

"Okay," he said, only slightly disappointed.

"And the beach?" Chelsea asked.

"And the beach," Sheppard assured her.

"You don't like the beach back home?" Logan asked.

"No, I love it, but... I wanna surf some different waves sometimes," she smiled.

"Oh really...?" Logan asked, arching an eyebrow at Sheppard.

"Don't look at me!" Sheppard chuckled. "You know I haven't had a chance to take her since I got back."

"Uncle Cameron did," Chelsea explained.

"And I can boogie-board good too!" Nic chimed in.

"Great... Buncha daredevils I have on my hands!" Logan groaned.

"But Mommy, you LOVE to surf!"

"Yes, I do... But *I'm* a grown-up!" Logan countered.

"Yeah, but honey, we were out there when we were kids..." Sheppard began.

Logan fixed him with a level gaze. "Keep it up, darling, you and the young ones'll be sharing a bed tonight..." she purred sweetly.

"Sorry kids, you're on your own!" Sheppard said, throwing his hands up in the air.

It didn't take much to rouse Tommy from his quick power nap, and the toddler was ready and raring to go again.

Later that evening, Logan sat in a chaise lounge by the pool and watched Sheppard frolic with Chelsea and Nic in the hotel swimming pool. Tommy had fallen asleep again, so she was holding him snuggled up against her in the chaise. It had been a VERY good day and they had many pictures to take back to Atlantis with them to remind the children of this special time. Logan needed no pictures to remind her though. She sighed softly as she met Sheppard's eyes across the pool from her and smiled. Times like these were forever etched in her memory.

ATLANTIS

Riateh peeked through the doorway as Mitchell sat rocking the twins in their room. He too had acquired new quarters; one large enough to accomodate himself and the twins. There were three bedrooms in all, but for now, while they were still so young, Mitchell and Logan preferred keeping the twins together. She smiled at the image of big, strong warrior, snuggled up with the two tiny babies. They were the very image of domestic bliss.

She tiptoed away, wanting to give him some privacy with his children. His parents had left Atlantis earlier that evening, which was why the twins hadn't gone with Sheppard and Logan to Earth. His parents had been granted access on a strictly limited and highly restricted basis. They came through the stargate under heavy sedation and returned to Earth the same way. Neither of them had any idea that they had traveled to another planet, let alone another galaxy during these rare visits. Watching him now, she could tell that, although he loved his parents dearly, their visit had taken a toll on him. There had been several times throughout their visit that Mitchell had, had to step in and defend Logan to his mother. Riateh was not at all uncomfortable with that, as she and Logan were friends, but she knew Mitchell had been concerned that his staunch defense and support of Logan might alienate her.

His mother was a truly lovely woman, who loved her son beyond measure and wanted only for him to be happy. She'd been bitterly disappointed to learn that he and Logan were not together, despite having created two beautiful children, and that was something she couldn't help but blame Logan for. It was incomprehensible to her that Logan could possibly choose any man over her beloved son - even if that man were her previously presumed dead husband. Riateh was pleased that his parents seemed to genuinely like her, and approve of the relationship they were building, but somewhat concerned that his mother still held a grudge against Logan for not marrying her son in spite of this.

Riateh had, had one chance to briefly pull Mitchell aside and assure him that his parents would eventually forgive Logan, as long as he, Mitchell, were happy. He took the hint and went about projecting as much happiness as he could muster. His parents eventually stopped harping on Logan and focused on Mitchell's life NOW. By the time they left, they were thoroughly enamored of Riateh, and they had both given their promise to try and get over their anger and disappointment with Logan.

She turned when Mitchell came into the room from the nursery. She smiled warmly up at him as he wrapped his arms around her. "You are tired," she observed.

"Yeah, a little," he yawned.

"More than a little, I think," she smiled, reaching up to lightly caress his face.

"Yeah well... I'm too wired to sleep," he yawned again.

"Is that so?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

He looked down at her and smiled happily. "Have I thanked you yet, for putting up with my parents?"

"Several times," she grinned.

"I know it was alot to deal with, between them and the twins..."

"I have no complaints," she informed him.

"No? That's amazing..."

"It does not bother me, the way you defended Logan to them, she murmured, anticipating his questions about the subject."

"You sure about that?" he asked skeptically.

"Quite sure. Logan is my friend, and we grow closer every day. She has given me a great gift by trusting me with helping you to care for her children. _And_ by trusting me with _you_."

"Me? I get what you're saying about the kids, she's very particular about who gets close to them, but... _me_?"

"She is very protective of you, as well, Cameron. You have always held a special place in her heart, and you always will."

"That's uh... And you're okay with that?" he asked incredulously.

"I am," she smiled.

"Not to look a gift horse in the mouth but... why?"

"We both had lives before we knew one another. How can I hold it against you that yours included another woman - one who gave you your children?"

"I..." he shook his head, unable to articulate an answer.

"Logan could have, if she were a different person, made things extremely difficult and uncomfortable for... the two of us... She could have forbade me to be anywhere near her children. She could have disapproved of our relationship and worked to... thwart...any growing bond between us."

"She would never..."

Riateh put a finger over his lips and chuckled. "Not _never_ , Cameron. I am sure there have been women in your life that she did not approve of."

He chuckled as well, thinking back on some of them. And yes, she could be vociferous in her disapproval if she chose to be. "Point taken," he grinned.

"I am fortunate, not only to have her approval where you and the children are concerned, but to be able to call her friend. She is an amazing woman, possessed of more gifts than even she knows. I am honored to be called her friend."

"That's very nice of you to say."

"I mean it."

"I know you do. And all of that makes my life, our lives, so much easier." He pulled her closer against him and bent down to lightly brush her lips with his own.

Her arms encircled his neck and she pressed her body against his. She knew he was tired, but it felt so good to be in his arms, to breathe in the scent of his skin. Warmth spread through her as his lips began trailing kisses down the side of her neck and across her shoulder. She knew if she didn't pull back soon, she would not be able to do so at all.

"I thought you were tired," she murmured in his ear.

"I'm getting my second wind," he whispered back.

EARTH

"What are we going to do about her?" Logan asked softly.

She and Sheppard were carefully watching Chelsea and Tommy in the shallow end of the pool. Like all Sheppards before him, Tommy had taken to the water like a fish. He was learning as quickly as his siblings had, but they were still watchful of him, and very proud of how patient, loving and attentive Chelsea and Nic were with him.

Sheppard shook his head and sighed deeply. "I don't know, Sparks... What _can_ we do?"

"Do you think she will ever get... better?"

"I'd hope so, for her sake," Sheppard replied.

"Not for Tommy's sake?"

He shrugged again. "Tommy's happier than I've ever seen him. Happier, more secure... Definitely more loved," he smiled, pulling her more tightly against him. "You're more of a mother to him than Yehra ever was... I'll always regret that... part..."

"Not Tommy..." she began, looking up at him in shock.

"No, no... I just... You are the only woman I ever wanted to have kids with," he explained.

"We have a beautiful family," she reminded him.

"Yes, we do..." he squeezed her affectionately.

"Think this is what your Dad had in mind for us?" she asked.

"I'm sure. He did want us to have LOTS of kids, well, we have five now... I'm sure he's out there (waving his arm around) somewhere, probably laughing his ass off right now!" he grinned.

"Probably!" she chuckled in agreement. "Are you going to see her when we get home?"

"I don't know if that's such a good idea. She just gets worse every time I do. She claims to want to see Tommy, but she practically ignores him every time I take him down there... I can't do that to him."

"I agree... But... Can we really keep on going with her in that limbo? Someday Tommy will start asking questions."

He shrugged again. "I don't know what else to do. Heightmeyer has been trying to get through to her, but she hasn't had any success."

"As much as I hate what she did to us... I feel sorry for her."

"Yeah, me too. But, we didn't do this to her. There was something already... broken... in her that made her this way. I feel guilty, a little, for whatever part I played in sending her over the edge, but..."

"You said it yourself, John. We didn't do this. You're not responsible for what she's brought down on herself. Even her oldest friend sees that, and he knows her better than anyone."

"Yeah... In the meantime, we have to continue building that new life for ourselves."

"Yes..." she smiled. "One that doesn't include tigers, please?" she teased, referencing the children's sudden desire to have one just like the one they saw at the zoo earlier that day.

"They can play with McKay's cats," he agreed.

"Be glad they didn't want the elephant!" she chuckled.

"Believe me, I AM!"

"Daddy look!" Tommy called.

They already had their eyes on him, so he waved, took a deep breath and then dipped under the water to begin swimming to his big sister. When his head came back up, they both applauded and told him what a great little swimmer he was.

"So... When we get back... Too soon to teach the twins to swim?" he teased.

She slapped playfully at him. "Much!" she said firmly. "Sort of. We'll see."

"Hey," his face suddenly turned serious. "Who the hell is that kid hanging around my daughter?" he asked, pointing at a young boy who was in the pool near Chelsea and smiling adoringly at her.

"Easy big fella," Logan cooed. "He's no older than she is."

"Yeah, well... You see the way he's looking at her?"

"John, they're FIVE!" she laughed.

"Exactly... So she doesn't need any boys hanging around drooling over her..." he looked so distraught at the thought that she didn't have the heart to laugh at him.

"God help her in a few years when boys REALLY start to notice her!"

"You're assuming that I'll let her out in public when she hits her teens?" he asked, completely serious.

"Suppose Sam Caldwell takes an interest in her one day?" she asked.

"Hah! I KNOW about those Caldwell men...So... HELL no!" he huffed.

Now she couldn't stifle her giggles. If he was this worried about boys now, he was going to be inconsolable by the time Chelsea hit her teen years.

"What are YOU laughing about? You... You had me to look out for you when we were kids, you know... to keep the riff-raff away!"

"Yes, my father thought I was so safe with you," she giggled.

"You were!"

"Uh-huh... Suppose he'd found out that the one who was supposed to keep other boys lips away from mine was the very one who gave me my first kiss..."

He paused for a moment, smiling as he thought back to that moment. "It would have been SOOOOO worth the ass-kicking I would've gotten!" he leered at her.

"Uh-huh..."

"That... was a _great_ kiss," he whispered seductively in her ear.

"Yes, it was... That, and every kiss since then," she murmured.

"Tell you what... Once we get these monkeys wrangled up and put to bed, I'll help you relive that memory," he suggested.

She looked up into his eyes and smiled softly, tracing a fingertip along the line of his jaw. "Deal," she murmured.

Heat flared between them as they gazed into each other's eyes. With supreme effort, Sheppard tore his eyes away and back to the kids.

"Alright you monkeys! Time to pack it in!" he called out hoarsely.

ATLANTIS - TWO DAYS LATER

Riateh stared at Yehra through the bars of her cell. She seemed calmer, but the outward calm did little to cover the raging desperation in her eyes. She had known Yehra for many years, had looked up to her as well. This was not the Yehra she had known and called friend before. That Yehra was gone. Looking in her eyes now, Riateh felt almost certain that THAT Yehra would never come back.

She felt sad. For Yehra. For her son. For Busek, her oldest friend. For the people she could have helped as a healer, and all those she could have taught to use the undiscovered gifts they had but didn't recognize. She was not one to judge. After all, she had found what Yehra never really had: Love. Requited love. Her young relationship with Cameron Mitchell was burgeoning, growing every day.

Riateh knew how much love Yehra had in her to give, but she wasted it all on the one man who never could, or would return that love. She could have moved on and one day found real love with someone who would return her feelings, had she accepted that Sheppard would never give his love to anyone but Logan. But she wouldn't. No matter how much they tried to reason with her. No matter how many times they begged and pleaded with her to rid herself of her obsession. All she could see was Sheppard.

"You are one of them now," Yehra said tonelessly.

"You might be surprised to find how many of them are... like us," Riateh replied.

"Impossible," she scoffed disdainfully.

"It is so, Yehra. And you have much to share with them, if you would but let go of this cruel obsession. If you would but come back to us, whole and sane."

"I do not care about the others," she sighed.

"No, I fear that much is true," Riateh nodded, deeply sad.

"Where is Adahm?"

"There is no Adahm, old friend."

"He calls himself by another name, but he will ever be Adahm to me."

"And you will ever be longing for a man who does not exist and never will."

Yehra finally looked directly at her, as though seeing her for the first time since she entered the room. "You have found love, little one," she observed flatly.

"Indeed."

"One of these here...?"

"The one called Cameron Mitchell... He is a fine man, Yehra. Strong and brave."

"Is he not the one who took... that woman... to wife when..." she trailed off.

"They never married, Yehra. You know this. Her heart and soul have always belonged to John Sheppard."

"And why would you settle for second best? That is what you wish for me... To settle for less than what I desire..."

"I do not settle, Yehra. Cameron does not hold on to the false hope that Logan will one day choose him over John Sheppard. He has opened his heart again and we have found our way to one another. It could be thus for you, if you would let go."

"Never..." she said sadly.

"Then... You have my pity..."

"Keep it! You will need it for yourself when that wretched woman decides to weave her spell over Mitchell again and steals him from you the way she stole my Adahm..."

Riateh turned and walked slowly out of the room. She made her way back to Mitchell's quarters, barely holding back tears as she went. When she got there, she clung to Mitchell, burying her face in his chest and sobbing.

"What's wrong?" he asked, deeply concerned.

"I am just...sad..." she replied.

"What happened?" he asked, concerned.

"I went to see Yehra..." she sniffed.

"Ah...Yeah, that'd make anyone sad..." he admitted.

"It is such a terrible...waste..." she sniffled.

"Yes, it is... It was very sweet of you to try getting through to her," he praised her.

"It is hard to help someone who doesn't want to help herself."

"Yes," he nodded, holding her close. "Can I ask you something, honey?"

"Of course. Anything."

"Last night, you said something... It didn't really register at the time, since I had... other...things on my mind."

She blushed at the memory of their first time, sharing their bodies together. "As did I," she smiled.

"Anyway..." he coughed. "You mentioned something about Logan having more gifts than even she realized... what did you mean?"

"I think I'd like to know the answer to that as well."

They turned at the sudden, familiar voice, to find Logan standing in the now open doorway, smiling. Nic and Tommy were standing beside her.

"Hey!" Mitchell greeted.

"Uncle Cam!" Nic shot forward, launching himself into Mitchell's arms.

A moment later, Tommy followed his brother's lead and did the same thing, surprising all three adults. Mitchell hugged them both close, alternately swinging one then the other through the air before placing them back down on their feet.

"How was your vacation?" Riateh asked.

"Short, but good."

"That is good to hear. Where are John and Chelsea?" she asked.

"They'll be along shortly, they stopped to talk to Rodney... Are the twins asleep?" she asked.

"Yeah... Put them down half an hour ago..." Mitchell replied.

"Oh..." she looked crestfallen. "I probably shouldn't wake them then."

He could see how much she missed them. "We can take them back to your place without waking them, I know you've missed them."

"I have...so much..." she admitted. "Were they good for you... and your parents?" she asked anxiously.

"They were great. You should have seen my Dad's face when Scotty threw up on his shoes!" Mitchell teased.

"No! He didn't...?" she gasped.

"He is teasing with you, Logan!" Riateh stepped in.

"I'm just... gonna take a quick peek at them, if you don't mind..."

"Go ahead, we've got the boys," Mitchell assured her.

She tiptoed into the nursery and watched her two youngest as they slept peacefully. She had missed them terribly while they'd been away, but she had never worried about their safety or well-being while they were with Mitchell and Riateh. All she wanted to do right now was take them in her arms and breathe in that heavenly baby scent.

"They are well, Logan." Riateh appeared behind her.

"I know... I never had any doubt about that. I just missed them."

"I imagine so."

"Thank you... for taking such good care of them... And Cameron."

Riateh blushed. "I enjoyed doing so."

"He is a wonderful man, Riateh."

"Yes...He is."

"I want you to know... We haven't REALLY had a chance to talk about it, but... I am happy the two of you... found each other."

"I am pleased to hear you say that," she admitted.

"Really...I couldn't think of anyone better...for him... I trust things are going...well?"

Riateh blushed again. "Very well, thank you."

"Good."

"And for you and John?"

Logan beamed happily. "VERY well," she said.

"We must talk...soon."

"Agreed!"

They heard the inevitable sound of Chelsea arriving as she squealed: "Uncle Cameron!"

"Hey there, squirt!" he lifted her off her feet and spun her around. "Have you GROWN since last I saw you?" he teased.

"I have to tell you ALL about our trip!" she gushed excitedly.

"And I can't wait to hear ALL about it," he replied, settling her on his hip.

"But that will have to wait til tomorrow, at least," Logan said, coming in from the nursery.

"Awwww..." Chelsea pouted.

"Awwww..." Mitchell protested.

"Don't start!" Logan warned.

"Alright... Listen squirt, I promise: Tomorrow, you can tell me everything, okay?"

"Okay!" she smiled and hugged him tight.

"Twins asleep?" Sheppard asked.

"Yeah... We'll carry them back for you, it looks like you have your hands full with these three," he laughed. "Maybe give you a head-start?" he looked at Sheppard.

"Good idea... It's gonna be hard to get these ones settled down enough to go to sleep," he admitted.

"Okay then..." Mitchell looked over at Logan and smiled.

"I'm just gonna go...peek at them first..." Sheppard said, as eager as Logan to get the twins back to their place.

They watched as Sheppard tiptoed softly into the nursery and looked down at the twins. They were so beautiful, he thought, and he loved them every bit as much as he loved the three he had fathered. They were, after all, a part of Logan. After a few moments, he went back out to the other room and they wrangled the other kids together, then set out for their own quarters.


	74. Chapter 74

"So... The trip was good?" Caldwell asked casually.

"The trip was great, thank you... again..."

"My pleasure. You earned it, though."

"Hmmm..." she murmured distractedly.

"What's wrong? You've only been back for two days!" he chuckled.

"Oh...Sorry...Nothing really."

"Logan...this is ME, remember?"

"Seriously Steve, nothing is WRONG, I promise."

"Then why are you so... distracted?"

"I...just...Do I really need a reason? I mean I have five kids now, six if you count John... sometimes..." she shook her head.

"Granted," he smiled. "You're not thinking of retiring, are you?" he asked, clearly horrified at the notion.

"No! Steve, God, no... I love my job and I couldn't imagine... No!" she chuckled. "I'm afraid you're stuck with me until they pry me out of here with a crowbar...or a crane..."

"Well, GOOD! I'd really hate to lose you...For a lot of reasons."

"Thank you."

"Is it Yehra?" he asked gingerly, knowing he'd hit the nail on the head as soon as her back stiffened.

"Partly," she admitted.

"How is the boy?" he asked.

"He's fine... wonderful really. It's incredible how much like Nic he is," she smiled fondly.

"Does he ask for her?"

"No..." her eyes grew a little sad. "He used to, but now... It's almost..."

"Almost what?"

"Almost as if he doesn't remember her...Or he doesn't want to. Don't get me wrong, I _love_ that little guy, just as much as my other children, but...I dunno...It's kind of sad."

"For him?"

"Well, yeah, in a way... He's such a great kid, bright, funny, talented, yet his own mother can't or doesn't see him. I find that very sad. She's missing out on so much. And he... he's missing out on his mother's love."

"No he's not," Caldwell said.

"Sure he is..."

"No, he isn't, Logan. He has _your_ love. You're a million times the mother she could ever be. It's obvious that you love him, I've seen you with him and you shower him with as much affection as you do all of your kids. He's not lacking for anything."

"I... thank you for saying that, Steve, and I hope you're right. On the one hand, it's nice that he doesn't have to see her in the state she's in right now, that wouldn't be good for him...But someday, there's gonna come a time when he starts to wonder why his own mother didn't..."

"Perhaps," he nodded. "But he's also gonna look back and see how much he was loved and cared for by _you_. That's what he'll have to hold onto."

"I just don't ever want him to feel like he was unworthy or anything."

"He never will, because of you. And because of John. Neither of you would let any of those kids grow up without a strong sense of self-worth."

"Thanks... You're too kind," she smiled and leaned up to plant a kiss on his cheek.

"Just calling 'em as I see 'em," he grinned. "And I gotta hand it to you... all of you... for the way you've all handled everything, between yourselves and the kids... Those kids now have the best - of all of you - and they never have to worry about being in the middle of some heated custody battle or anything."

"We're very lucky."

"Yes you are," he grinned again.

Just then, she saw Riateh pass by her office and she remembered the comment she'd overheard when she went to pick up the twins from Mitchell's quarters.

"Steve?"

"Hmmm?"

"How much have the Alterrans said about their relationship to us?" she asked curiously.

"Uh, well, just since you've been gone?" he asked.

"I guess...I just...Remember when they first mentioned that some of US are actually Ancients as well?"

"Yeah..."

"Don't suppose they've actually narrowed that down to specifics, have they?"

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Well, that whole whoever-has-the-gene-is-actually-an-Ancient-but-doesn't-know-it thing is really pretty vague..."

"True... Look at Mitchell, he had the gene therapy, right?"

"Right... The gene wasn't detected in him prior to coming here, but yet they, or rather Riateh, says that he IS an Ancient...If that's not confusing..."

"Right... Maybe we should try pinning them down a bit more. Did something specific happen to make you wonder?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Just something I overheard her say when we got back."

"About?"

"Me...I think..." she shrugged.

"What was it?"

"Something about me having more *gifts* than even I realized or something like that."

"Well, that's enough to make me curious!"

"You want me to gather the Alterran councillors?" she asked.

"Set it up for this afternoon?" he asked, standing up and heading for the door.

"I'll let you know what time," she assured him.

"And Logan," he looked back.

"Yes?"

"Welcome back... You have been missed."

She smiled. "It's good to be back."

THREE HOURS LATER

Riateh looked around the conference table and shrugged. "I do not know why the gene was not detected in Cameron Mitchell, prior to him receiving this gene therapy you have spoken of," Riateh began. "But the fact of the matter is, he IS what you call an Ancient, as are all those who possess this marker."

"See, now I don't get that... Either we're completely wrong about what it is this gene really means, how it makes us able to operate ancient technology, or you guys just have a very different definition of what, or who, is an Ancient," Sheppard said.

"As I explained to Logan, it is not so cut and dried as you might believe. As with any physical or genetic trait passed on by one's ancestors, this...gene...it can be...diluted...over time through each generation. Most humans of your world have had this gene completely wiped out through the ages, but there are those, who through fate, or what have you, have descended from purely Alterran, or Ancient, bloodlines. People like yourself and Logan, for example. Then there are those who possess the gene, but their abilities or gifts are not as strong in them as they are in you."

"So that's why operating ancient technology is virtually effortless for people like Logan and John, while others have to really work at it?" Weir asked.

"Precisely. I have not met many of your people here, so I cannot tell you how many are of as pure a lineage as Logan or John, or Cameron."

"Sounds like you're the one I need to help me with my research," Beckett smiled at her.

"I will be happy to help," she agreed readily.

"As will all of us," Busek assured them.

"Riateh, when you speak of these...gifts, or abilities...To what are you referring?" Logan asked.

"Healing, for one."

"Like Yehra?" Sheppard asked.

"Precisely. It is fairly rare, even among our people. Not all of us were healers, even back then. The plague would not have wiped us out so completely had more of us possessed the healing ability."

"And there are others among you, besides Yehra, who have this ability?"

"A few, but they are more limited in their abilities than Yehra, who is of pure lineage. They could not, for example, have done what Yehra did in healing John Sheppard. Yet they are capable of healing some disease and injury."

"Interesting..." Logan murmured.

"Well, I think this would be a good time to take a break for now," Weir announced.

As the group began to break up and go off in separate directions, Logan remained in her seat and stared out the window, lost in thought. Sheppard went up behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders.

"Do I need to show you the penny first, or will you put it on my tab?" he teased.

"You mean you don't already know what I'm thinking?" she asked.

"You're wondering what special gifts Riateh was talking about when she mentioned yours."

"See that? Keep your pennies," she smiled.

"Some gifts must be discovered on their own," Riateh had come up behind both of them.

"So you know, but you aren't going to tell us?" Logan asked.

"I cannot simply look at you and know WHICH abilities you possess, only that you possess many."

"Cryptic much?" Sheppard teased.

"I am sorry... I hope you know that I would tell you, if I knew."

"I believe you would. You'll have to forgive us, Riateh. The ascended ancients we've dealt with have always insisted that they could not interfere, or HELP we lower life forms... Even when on the brink of annihilation... It's been a bit... frustrating, to say the least."

"I imagine so," she smiled.

"So why haven't we noticed any of these greater abillities you speak of?"

"I cannot say, really. I suppose it is like any other talent. One never knows they possess such a talent until they try to use it."

"Is it really that simple?" Sheppard asked.

"You tell me, John... Has it not always been simple for you to use the technology? Almost effortless, in fact."

"Well, yeah, but most of this stuff is machinery or equipment..."

"It comes to life with a thought or touch?"

"Something like that, yeah."

"What makes you believe that your other abilities would not work in the same way?"

Logan and Sheppard exchanged curious glances. "I don't know," they said in unison.

"Perhaps you should try it," she encouraged them.

LATER THAT DAY

"I think you're trying too hard," Daniel said simply.

Logan turned and glared at him. "Well, she said that we should try..."

"Try and _what_... exactly?" he asked.

She stared at him for a moment, perplexed. "I don't know Daniel... _Something_!"

"Well, sweetie... It's not like oh... singing...for example. You KNOW what singing is, so you can actually TRY doing it. How are you supposed to try and do... anything... if you don't have at least SOME idea of what it is you want to try and do?" he asked.

She blinked a few times and kept staring at him. "Good point."

"Thank you... Seriously though... I think you might be putting too much pressure on yourself to try and make something happen."

"When have you ever known me not to do that?" she asked with a slight frown.

"NEVVVVERRRRR!" he laughed.

"Alright, alright... You have a point... How's Kitah doing, by the way?"

"Good, good... You wanna come see the baby?" he asked.

Kitah had just given birth to their third child, a girl, named Alyssia Claire. Her older brothers, David and Mel, were already utterly besotted with her. All three children had the same remarkable blue eyes as their father, as opposed to Kitah's brown. Like her own children, Daniel and Kitah's brood all bore a distinct resemblance to Daniel.

"I'd love to see the baby!" she smiled.

Daniel led her to their quarters and stuck his head inside the door. Kitah was sitting on the sofa, Alyssia asleep on her shoulder. The boys were playing in their room, quietly for a change. Kitah motioned them inside and Logan tiptoed quietly into the room and took a seat next to Kitah.

"I'll only stay a minute; I just wanted to take a quick peek at her," she whispered.

"Would you like to hold her?" Kitah asked.

"I don't want to wake her," Logan said.

"She is not likely to wake now, she has just eaten."

She gingerly handed the tiny, pink bundle to Logan, who expertly took her in her arms and held her close so she could look down on the perfect little face.

"She's so beautiful," Logan whispered.

"Thank you," Kitah beamed.

"Very different from having boys, isn't it?"

"Very!" Kitah agreed.

"You and I have been greatly outnumbered in our respective families," Logan said. "About time we started turning the tide."

"Agreed!" Kitah chuckled, reaching out to softly caress Daniel's face.

"David has been asking when he could have a play-date with Chelsea."

Logan chuckled softly. "If John has his way, he's going to bar her from seeing any boys until she's thirty, but I'll see what I can do."

"Hey, I'm with John," Daniel said. "I don't want any boys around this little one...well...EVER!" he admitted unashamedly.

"When we were on earth, John saw this little boy playing with Chelsea in the pool and I swear, I thought he was going to come un-nutted and throttle the poor little guy!" Logan told them.

"Can't say that I blame him," Daniel defended Sheppard.

"Please, Daniel... He was FIVE, just like her!"

"It's never too soon to set some boundaries..." he grinned.

"You guys are hopeless!" Logan shook her head.

Alyssia took that moment to suddenly scrunch up and let fly with a rather large expulsion of gas, followed by the rapid filling of her diaper. Daniel winced and reached his arms out to her.

"That sounds like my cue," he said.

Logan handed him the baby and stood up to take her leave. "And I should be getting back to work," she gave Kitah a hug and promised to set up a play-date with the kids.

TWO WEEKS LATER - FAUX NEW LANTEA

"You're kidding, right?" Logan asked.

"I assure you, I am not," Roth replied.

"You don't really expect us to trust them, do you?"

"Of course not. I do hope that you have learned to trust me, though."

Logan eyed him warily. She'd really had very little contact with him over the years, since he'd helped them retrieve the children after they'd been kidnapped. He had proven himself, then. But they had kept a tight reign on him since that time. To this day, he still knew nothing about Atlantis, nor did any of the other rebel Genii. They still believed that Atlantis had been destroyed and that the earthlings were operating out of other bases scattered throughout the Pegasus galaxy.

"You, I trust," she admitted. "Whether or not they can be trusted is a whole other matter."

"Understandable, Colonel. But if we are to make any progress at all, in liberating AND educating the Genii people, we must begin to trust."

"You know, we tried that with your little group, and it only took one woman to wreak havoc on us, in the worst possible way... Attacking us through our children... Roth, you have to understand, that is the worst kind of betrayal."

"I do understand, Colonel Devane, and I agree with you completely. That is why I'm not even suggesting that they come to New Lantea or any of your other bases. We can and should find neutral territory on which to meet. Where neither side has a clear advantage over the other, as a way to safeguard against treachery."

"Okay... Roth... I get where you're coming from, and there is a part of me that agrees with you. It would be very nice not to have to butt heads with the Genii whenever we encounter them. If they could be trusted, an alliance with them would greatly enhance our ability to fight and maybe defeat the wraith once and for all. However..."

"How do you overcome centuries of programming by our leaders?" he asked.

"I'm not saying it can't be done, Roth. Look at Teal'c...His people were enslaved for thousands of years before they were finally able to rise up, band together and, with our help, they were able to win their freedom and defeat their oppressors. But THAT took many years to accomplish. Old beliefs and old prejudice is hard to overcome."

"Agreed."

"Well, I can't make any guarantees, but I will talk to my superiors about it. I'll get back to you as soon as I know anything, fair enough?"

"Fair enough... and Colonel Devane?"

"Yes?"

"If I may ask... How ARE your children?" he asked tentatively.

Her broad smile spoke volumes. "They're well, and growing like weeds!"

"That is good to know, I am pleased for you."

"Thank you... And thank you for asking."

"I appreciate you taking the time to hear me out. You have been most generous to even consider this after everything the Genii have put you through."

"It's in our nature to help where we can, Roth."

"Still...I do appreciate it."

"I believe you truly want what's best for your people. I just hope your people want that as well."

"As long as enough of them want things to change, I believe we can accomplish what we set out to do."

"This much is true," she smiled. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I must be getting back to my duties. I'll walk you to the stargate."

He stood when she did and followed her out the door and down the hall to the gateroom. They chatted amicably while they waited for the wormhole to engage, then she bid him farewell and watched him step through. She waited a moment, then instructed the sergeant on duty to dial Atlantis.

"So, they want to try again, do they?" Caldwell asked.

"Yes sir...It's been years but they've managed to rally more Genii to their cause, enough to make him believe that they just might be successful in attempting a coup d'etat...with our help, of course."

"Of course."

"Well...The only problem with more numbers, is that it makes it harder to weed out the bad seeds, but...in order to be successful, we'll need superior numbers..."

"A double-edged sword, especially when dealing with the Genii... I'll take their proposal to General O'Neill and we can go from there. Colonel, thanks for taking the meeting."

"Yes sir, no problem."

INFIRMARY - BECKETT'S LAB

"Maybe that's the reason then," Beckett said.

"The transfusions?" Mitchell asked.

"Aye...Don't you think so, lass?" he asked Riateh.

"It is possible...It would take time for the...stronger...cells to rewrite the transfused blood cells."

"Stronger?" Mitchell laughed. "You were going to say superior, weren't you?"

"I did not want to offend," she replied sheepishly.

"No offense taken, sweetie," he assured her.

"Well that's one mystery we may have solved...How many more to go then?" Beckett joked.

"Too many to count, Doc!" Mitchell hopped off the gurney and rolled his sleeve back down. "You done with me?"

"For now...I know where to find you if I need you again."

"Just leave me enough to keep me on my feet, okay?" Mitchell clapped him on the back, then took Riateh's hand and led her from the infirmary.

"You are in a good mood today," Riateh observed.

"Any reason I shouldn't be? I mean, last night, I had one of the best home-cooked meals I've had in a long time, got to bed early; though not to sleep," he leered. "And started the day off with a beautiful, sexy woman in my bed this morning... What's not to be in a good mood about?" he grinned.

"You are easy to please," she blushed.

"Not everyone would agree with you about that, but... I am easy to please as far as YOU are concerned!" he smiled and kissed her impulsively.

"And you make me happy as well, Cameron Mitchell."

"I'd like to think so," he said softly, holding her against him as they stepped into the transporter.

"May I ask you something?"

"Sure, anything."

"These people Logan spoke of...The Genii..." she paused when she felt him stiffen at the name. "You do not like them?"

"No," he replied honestly.

"May I ask what it is they have done?"

"Honey, I could write a book, but suffice it to say, the worst thing they've done...One family in particular...They approached us under the guise of peace, proposing to form an alliance and..." he trailed off, anger burning in his eyes.

"And...?"

"They stole the children..." he said, gritting his teeth.

"What?!" she gasped. "Who?"

"Chels and Nic, they were just babies then...Daniel's son, David, Hope, Sam, Torus and Riley Caldwell..."

"How? How did they get to the children?" she was horrified.

"We were meeting with them, on another base, so they wouldn't figure out that the Wraith hadn't really destroyed Atlantis...They put some kind of gas in the ventilation system, to knock us all out, and by the time we came to, all the children were gone."

"Yet, they did not kill you?"

"Stealing the children was far worse than simply killing us...This way, they HURT us - or rather, John and Logan mainly."

"What do you mean?"

"The woman who set it all up, she's the one who took Nic and Chels. She made it pretty easy for us to find the others, but she went to elaborate lengths to make sure we couldn't find Nic and Chels. She blamed John and Logan for the death of her brothers and..."

"She wanted them to suffer."

"Yes. It took us weeks to find them... When we finally caught up to them... They almost killed the kids rather than giving them back to us..."

Riateh gasped again. "No!"

"Yeah...It was...bad."

"Thank you for telling me. Now I understand your feelings toward them."

"We could have forgiven all the other times they've...tried to betray us, but...not that..."

"I could not either. I do not know how Logan was able to go meet with them."

"She's a professional. But the man she was meeting with actually helped us to track them down."

"Oh... So he is an ally then?"

"So far..." he winced.

"Still, it must have been very difficult for her."

"Like I said," he shrugged. "She's a professional."

ONE HOUR LATER

Riateh peeked into the gym, hoping to find Logan there, but it was Teyla and Hope that she found instead. Riateh greatly admired Teyla, for many reasons. She had been stunned when she first heard about Teylas' Wraith-daughter, Hope. Amazed that Teyla and Teal'c had taken her in as an infant and raised her as their own. Riateh had always been one who believed in giving people the benefit of the doubt, but it still made her a bit... uncomfortable... to be around the child.

True, her lineage was not glaringly apparent at first glance, but if one knew what to look for, one could find her Wraith characteristics. From what Mitchell and Logan had told her, Hope looked more human with each passing year. What concerned Riateh, however, was not what was on the surface, but what lurked within. Would the child, one day in the future, turn on those who'd loved and raised her? Would her Wraith instincts eventually kick in and take over, subverting her humanity? No one knew. They all felt fairly certain that she would remain more...human...But no one could say for certain that some drastic change wouldn't occur.

For now, the young girl was sweet and loving. Fiercely protective of her sibling and her friends. Riateh watched as Teyla took Hope through her sparring practice, admiring the strength and grace they both possessed. She could see the love and adoration Hope felt for Teyla, it was written all over her face, and it shone through her eyes. Looking at her now, it was easy to see why she had managed to capture the hearts of the Lanteans, and to forget the lineage she had descended from.

Beckett had never quite managed to figure out WHY Hope was so human, as opposed to Wraith. He'd been working on it for years, from what Mitchell had told her, in the hopes of finding a way to turn all of the Wraith more... human. As of yet, he'd had no success in finding a permanent *fix*. Nor had he figured out how the Wraith had done it with Hope. It was something she found fascinating, and she planned on making a point of offering to help Beckett work on the problem.

"Riateh?" Logan was passing in the hall and saw her in the doorway.

"Logan, I was looking for you," she smiled, stepping out into the hall.

"Present and accounted for. What's up?"

"Cameron told me about your meeting with the Genii."

"Uh-huh," she nodded.

"I hope you do not mind, but he also told me about what happened a few years ago...About the children..." she trailed off.

Logan stiffened, but just for a moment. "No, I don't mind him telling you, I would have anyway."

"It must have been so...awful...for you."

"It was. And I'll be forever grateful that we got them back."

"Indeed. It must have been painful for you to meet with them again."

"Actually, it was just the one, and he actually helped us find them, so seeing him doesn't really bother me."

"Do you trust this man?" she asked.

"As much as I'm capable of trusting a Genii...? I'm not sure... I guess I do, more than any other Genii. I am grateful that he helped us, but..."

"His allegiance will always be to his own people?"

"In a sense. He has worked tirelessly for years now to make a Genii revolution happen. He seems genuinely horrified by what happened before and he swore he would spend the rest of his life trying to make it up to us... I would like to believe him."

"But you cannot?"

"Not completely, no. I know that sounds horrid, but..."

"It is understandable. I would feel the same way, in your shoes. I was not even here when this happened and I find myself not liking or trusting them!" she admitted.

"Is that because you trust Cameron's instincts maybe?" she teased.

"Perhaps. But I have come to know you and yours well. I care for your children deeply, as I care for you...It pains me to know the suffering they put you through."

"Thank you, Ri..." she smiled, touched by the other woman's declaration. "Now...Tell me, how are things going with Cameron?"

Riateh blushed. "He is...amazing."

"As are you, and you both deserve to be happy."

"We are happy..." she smiled, her eyes shining. "Are you?"

"Very!" Logan chirped.

At that moment, Sheppard and Mitchell rounded the corner and ran smack into the two women. They exchanged curious glances as they approached.

"Ladies," Sheppard greeted.

"Gentlemen," Logan replied.

"What are we up to?" Mitchell asked.

Logan quickly winked at Riateh and turned to the men. "Actually we were just talking about how the two of us, could beat the tar out of the two of you in a sparring match with the sticks..." Logan teased.

"That sounds like a challenge to me, Cameron...You?"

"Definitely a challenge... But something tells me they're up to something..."

"Well, okay then... If you're too much of a coward to..." Logan trailed off, a taunting note in her tone.

"Hey!" Sheppard yelped.

"Whoa, wait a minute, woman... Coward?! Did you just call us cowards?" Mitchell asked.

"If that yellow stripe down your back fits..." Logan chuckled.

"Okay, alright... It's _on_ now!" Mitchell said.

"Oh God..." Sheppard groaned.

"We promise to go easy on you," Riateh joined in the teasing.

"Sure you do," Sheppard muttered, wincing.

"Come on, John... Let's teach these girls some respect..." Mitchell said, clapping him on the back.

LATER THAT EVENING

Sheppard lay on the floor with the twins playing on either side of him. He'd known when Mitchell got them into that sparring match that he was about to be handed his ass on a platter, but he still had that competitive edge about him that refused to give up. He hadn't gone back to training as he should have when he returned to Atlantis, he knew that. Over three years with no training made John Sheppard a very dull boy, at least when it came to stick-fighting.

Logan, though, had been a good sport about her rather convincing victory over him. She had, in fact, gone easy on him. At least, easy for Logan anyway. What had surprised him was Riateh's natural ability. She had taken to the sticks like a fish to water, and by the time they were through, she'd had Mitchell back on his heels several times. He was even more surprised when she told them that she'd never had even one lesson prior to that. As it turned out, she had learned several moves and tactics just from watching Teyla with Hope, and how Logan sparred with Sheppard.

"What's wrong Daddy?" Nic asked, looking down on him.

"Daddy's sore, buddy."

"Why?" asked Tommy.

"Mommy beat Daddy up today," he mumbled.

Chelsea heard this as she came into the room from her bedroom and began giggling hysterically. Sheppard managed to lift his head off the floor long enough to glare at her dejectedly.

"You think that's funny shorty?" he asked.

"Yes Daddy," she giggled.

"What's so funny about it?"

"Men always think they're stronger than women cause they're bigger. Mommy taught me different," she said, shooting her mother a look of admiration.

"You haven't been teaching her... have you?" he asked Logan.

"Yeah, sure, you betcha snookums..." she replied.

"Great...We outnumber the women in this family and they can still kick our..."

"JOHN!" Logan warned.

"...Hineys!" he finished.

The children erupted into laughter at the word 'hiney,' and the twins just giggled because the others were laughing.

"Okay you monkeys..." Logan began. "Time to wash up for dinner!"

The kids ran at once to the bathroom, with the twins trying to crawl along behind them. Sheppard reached out and grabbed Cadence while Logan corralled Scott. He rolled onto his back and held her up in the air.

"You...I can still take!" he teased.

Cadence gurgled and cooed, kicking her legs excitedly as Sheppard made faces at her. Scott looked down from Logan's arms at his twin and reached out his arms for Sheppard, who looked up at him and smiled.

"Oh, I see... ganging up on me now, are you? Well, bring it on munchkins!" he growled.

Logan chuckled and, shaking her head, she deposited Scott on Sheppard's chest, then went to check on the other three.


	75. Chapter 75

Negotiations continued with Roth and the other rebel Genii for several months. Both O'Neill and Hammond had been supervising the negotiation process personally and were relatively confident that an alliance just might be possible. The off-world teams had been running into Genii strikeforces here and there all over the galaxy and they were getting more and more aggressive with each attack. Though they hadn't lost any of their people, they had come close a few times. They had been able to capture or kill every member of each strikeforce that attacked them, but that didn't stop Cowan from sending more out. Something had to be done.

Logan smiled as O'Neill sauntered into her office late one afternoon.

"Sir."

"Colonel, how's your day?"

"Good, sir... How go the negotiations?" she smiled at him, inordinately pleased that she didn't have to attend all those meetings.

"Fine, fine... I tend to nod off a lot, but Dr. Weir and General Hammond tell me things are progressing nicely. I'd have a lot more fun if you were in there with me," he grinned boyishly.

She cringed in horror at the thought. "I'm not a negotiator, sir... I'm like you, remember?"

"Right... Which is why I'd have more fun if you joined us!" he chirped.

"You aren't going to order me to, are you sir?" she turned a shade paler.

"Nah! Bad enough I have to be there, no need to take it out on you," he assured her.

"Thank you... You had me worried there for a minute."

"So... How's the family?" he asked.

"Very well, thank you."

"FIVE kids?!" he winced. "Five?!"

Logan chuckled. "I know... Hard to imagine, right?"

"Kind of," he admitted. "Once you hooked up with Sheppard, I guess I always figured you'd have your hands full enough with him."

She nodded, biting back a chuckle. "He's a handful alright..."

"I never got to tell you... After he came back... You know..."

"Thank you. I'm happy to have him back, too, sir."

Alarms started blaring and Kestler's voice sounded over the city wide.

"Off-world activation!" he announced.

Her security teams immediately poured into the gateroom, taking up defensive positions around the area. O'Neill smiled as he watched them all get into position.

"Sharp bunch of kids you have here," he grinned approvingly.

"Thank you, General, and yes, they are. I'll be sure to convey your compliments."

"Do that!" he said.

"DO we have an ID yet?" she heard Bates ask.

"It's...SG-1..." he replied.

"What? Why are they..." O'Neill began running toward the control room.

"Lower the shield! Kestler, report!" Logan ordered.

"They're taking fire, ma'am... It's the Genii!" he replied.

"Of course it's the Genii... Dammit!" Logan cursed.

A moment later, Teal'c appeared, carrying someone... possibly Daniel over his shoulder, followed by several men women and children who were all crying and yelling, and clearly terrified. More people began to pour through the gate and Logan ordered her men to secure all the civilians then called for backup. Finally Carter appeared and shouted for them to raise the shield. Carter and one of the civilians were dragging the still form of Mitchell as they came through.

"Medical team to the gateroom NOW!" called Logan.

"Report!" ordered O'Neill.

"We were attacked, General O'Neill. A large Genii strikeforce stormed the village. They began firing at everyone in sight. Women. Children even." Teal'c explained, gingerly setting Daniel down on the floor. "Daniel Jackson and Colonel Mitchell were hit as they attempted to shield the children from enemy fire."

Logan gasped as she saw the extent of their wounds. Each of them had been hit at least three times, and they were both rapidly losing blood.

"Where is that medical team?" she shouted just as they burst out of the hallway.

She had gone completely white as the seriousness of their condition hit her like a ton of bricks. This was bad. Very bad. As soon as the two men were placed on gurneys, Logan shot from the room and headed straight for the brig.

No one was more surprised to see Logan charge into the brig than Yehra. Her eyes narrowed and immediately turned cold and dark.

"What are you doing here?" she hissed.

"Giving you an opportunity to redeem yourself!" Logan snapped.

"Meaning?"

"There are two men upstairs who need your... help... If you ever want to have any hope of getting out of this cell, you will help them... NOW!" her eyes flashed with anger and frustration, mixed with fear.

"And I should help them... why?" she asked haughtily.

"Number one, it's the right thing to do. Number two, your son loves both those men. Number three, so does John. If you really want to show him that you're worthy of his respect, you will save his friends."

The two women faced one another through the bars.

"They are truly friends of his?" she asked.

"They are."

"Then I will come."

"Guard! Let her out and escort her to the infirmary!" Logan ordered.

The security shield was lowered and six guards appeared to surround her, their weapons held at the ready. Logan took a deep breath, then followed them upstairs.

The infirmary was in near pandemonium. Daniel and Mitchell were losing blood almost as fast as they could pump more into them. Beckett and the nurses were working feverishly to stabilize them, but they seemed to be fighting a losing battle. Busek arrived moments later with a man who possessed some ancient healing ability, but he regretfully told them that the men's wounds were far beyond his own ability to heal them. As they were shunted out of the way, Logan arrived with Yehra and the security detail surrounding her. She pointed at the two men on the gurneys.

"Help them!"

Yehra's eyes flashed angrily as she recognized both men instantly. "These are not the loved ones of my Adahm!" she shrieked. "These are YOURS!" she turned angrily on Logan. "I will not do this for YOU!"

"They are _John's_ friends, Yehra!" cried Busek from the back of the room.

"No!"

"Help them!" Logan screamed.

"NOOO!" Yehra screeched and then summoned all of her rage into a single thought.

In an instant, everyone standing between her and the door suddenly flew back through the air and hit the wall. Their weapons skidded across the floor as they all landed in a tangled heap of bodies on the floor. Before they could untangle themselves, Yehra held out her hand and two of the weapons flew into her hands. She then bolted for the door and disappeared through it.

"Stop her!" Logan ordered, trying to untangle herself from the others.

Suddenly the harsh, high pitched whine of the alarm on Daniel's monitor sounded.

"We're losing him!" Beckett cried.

"NO!" Logan and O'Neill cried in unison, still trying to disentangle themselves from the others.

O'Neill was first to free himself and he immediately went to Daniel's side. "Come on buddy, don't do this!" he called to Daniel. "Daniel, NO!" he looked at Beckett, who shook his head negatively.

"There's nothing I can do... He's losing too much blood..."

O'Neill shook his head and impulsively reached out to touch Daniel's face. "Not again... Daniel, please..."

The alarm on Mitchell's monitor began shrieking as well.

"NO!" Logan cried from the floor.

No one but O'Neill saw the faint light beginning to emanate from under the hand he had placed on Daniel's chest. At first. Beckett was busy pounding on Mitchell's chest, trying to get his heart started again. Logan finally managed to get up from the floor and, just as she did, she saw the light glowing under O'Neill's hand. Her eyes met his across the room and she instinctively knew what he was doing... And what she had to do.

She pushed the nurses aside and with tears streaming down her face, she placed one hand on Mitchell's head and one on his chest. She closed her eyes and mustered all the strength she had within. Focusing that strength on one thought, she became still.

"Logan... Get outta the way, lass!" Beckett cried.

"No! Leave her!" Busek called out, pointing to what O'Neill was doing with Daniel.

Daniel was partially illuminated by the light emanating from O'Neill's hands and they all watched in shock as Daniel's chest miraculously began to rise and fall again. Suddenly light flared brightly under Logan's hand covering Mitchell's chest. Slowly, she lifted her hand and moved it to where one of the bullets penetrated his body. Blood stopped flowing and they watched in amazement as the flesh began to mend and then the bullet rose out of the wound just before the wound closed up completely. She could actually feel the tissue and flesh mending beneath her hand. She moved on to the second wound and when that healed with the same result, she moved onto the third and fourth wounds, healing them as well. All the while, O'Neill was doing the same thing with Daniel, who regained consciousness just as O'Neill slumped over him.

The S.O.'s immediately rushed to him and carried him over to the next bed. An instant later, Logan began weaving on her feet and then she, too, slumped over. Mitchell regained consciousness as Logan was placed in the bed next to him.

"What the hell..." he croaked groggily.

"Dear God," Beckett gasped.

Both men were now sitting up and looking around in confusion. "What just happened?" Daniel asked.

"She...He...They..." the nurse stammered.

"They healed you... the both of you!" Beckett shook his head in disbelief.

"What?!" Mitchell gasped.

"They?" Daniel asked.

"General O'Neill... Logan..." Beckett was shaking his head in disbelief.

Mitchell grabbed his chest and looked down. There was blood all over him, but not a trace of any wounds. "We got hit... I remember..."

Daniel clutched his own chest, staring at O'Neill and then Logan. "Me too."

Mitchell launched himself off the bed and staggered over to Logan's side. "What's wrong with her?" he asked fearfully. "With both of them?"

Busek stepped forward. "The healing process is quite draining, Colonel... They just need rest," he explained.

"But..." Mitchell took her hand in his. It felt like ice. "She's cold!" he cried, grabbing a blanket from the foot of the bed and tucking it snugly around her.

"Let me see her, lad," Beckett said, easing him aside.

Daniel got out of bed and went to O'Neill. "Jack?"

One of the nurses followed Mitchell's lead and covered O'Neill with a blanket as well, then began checking his vital signs.

"Heart rate and respiration are fine," Beckett announced. "Can I get a scan on them, please?" he asked the nearest nurse.

"Jack?" Daniel called again.

He was rewarded a moment later with a low moan from O'Neill.

"Jack?" he called again.

"Daniel?" O'Neill grimaced before his eyes popped open and he bolted upright. "Daniel?"

"Hey there," Daniel smiled.

"Hey yourself... What are you..." he looked around, surprised to find himself in bed.

"I understand I have you to thank for... getting me back on my feet?" Daniel said.

"Oh...That..." O'Neill shrugged. "So why am I the one in bed?" he asked.

"Not just you," Daniel pointed across the room. "Logan, too."

O'Neill immediately tried to get up, only to be pushed back by Daniel.

"Wait a minute, Jack..."

He looked over at Mitchell's pale, concerned face. "Mitchell?"

"Sir?"

"You alright?" he asked.

"Good as new, sir... As long as Logan is..."

"Whoa!" Logan blurted out, bolting upright suddenly. She blinked, looking around the room at all the astonished faces and catching O'Neills' eye just as he winked at her. "What'd I miss?" she asked casually.

Mitchell immediately engulfed her in a great big bear hug, a tear streaming down his face. "Are you alright?" he asked.

"Yeah-huh... You?" she blinked at him, somewhat confused.

"Thanks to you," he murmured.

"Daniel?" she called out.

"I'm fine," he assured her.

A moment later, Sheppard burst into the infirmary, concern and fear etched on his handsome face as he tried to make sense of the scene he'd just walked in on. He was shocked at seeing Logan and O'Neill in beds, while Daniel and Mitchell were both on their feet.

"Logan...baby..." he rushed forward as Mitchell stepped back and took her in his arms. "What the hell's going on here?" he asked.

"John, I'm fine," she assured him.

"Better than fine," Daniel began. "Apparently your wife has finally found one of those ancient abilities Riateh said she had."

"What? And no offense guys, but I was told that you'd been shot and weren't expected to live..."

"We were," Mitchell and Daniel said in unison.

"God, it's contagious!" O'Neill groaned.

"Then..."

"They healed us," Mitchell told him.

"They...who?" Sheppard asked.

"Logan and General O'Neill," Mitchell replied.

"What?!" Sheppard gasped.

"It's true lad," Beckett confirmed.

He went on to explain to Sheppard everything that had happened since bringing Daniel and Mitchell to the infirmary, including Yehra's escape.

LATER

"It was... weird..." Logan said.

"How did you..." Sheppard trailed off.

"I honestly couldn't tell you... I saw General O'Neill put his hands on Daniel and something just made me...try..."

"You see? I told you," Riateh beamed happily at her, still clinging to Mitchell.

"But you didn't know I could do...that," Logan pointed out.

"No. But I am forever grateful that you can, and that you did," Riateh teared up again at the thought of losing Mitchell.

Her first thought had been the same as Logan's when she learned that he was near death. Beg Yehra to heal him. She'd been horrified to learn that Yehra had not only refused, but had escaped from custody in the process. Then when she arrived at the infirmary to find Mitchell healthy and whole, because Logan had healed him... Logan had won her unending gratitude and respect.

An S.O. suddenly burst into the room where they were talking and walked right up to Sheppard and Logan.

"Sir, ma'am?" the young private saluted them.

"What is it Private?" Logan asked.

"The escaped prisoner, ma'am."

"You've found her?" Sheppard askd.

"Yes sir."

"Do you have her back in custody?" Logan asked.

"In a manner of speaking, ma'am."

Just then, a gurney with a body covered by a sheet was wheeled past the room and down the hall in the direction of the morgue.

"Private?" Logan prodded.

"The prisoner is dead, ma'am, sir."

"What?" they all cried in shock.

"It appears she took her own life."

"How's that?" Sheppard asked, clearly rattled.

"They found her in the water, sir. She has a gunshot wound to her head, and there was still a gun clutched in her right hand when they found her. A search of the exterior turned up blood near the railing off the north pier."

They were all horrified.

"Thank you, Private. You're dismissed."

"God John... I'm...sorry," Mitchell said.

"She must have known there would be no way to redeem herself in your eyes after she refused to heal Daniel and Cameron," Riateh pointed out.

"Doesn't mean we'd want her dead," Sheppard murmured.

"No. But that would be far easier for her than having to face you."

"But to do this to her own son?" Logan asked angrily. "Bad enough she virtually abandons him, but..." she broke off, shaking her head. "What are we going to tell him?"

"It has been months since he's even seen her," Riateh reminded them.

"I know but..."

"Does he even ever ask for her anymore?" Mitchell asked.

"No... He's started calling Logan 'Mama' now," Sheppard informed them.

"He has?" Logan asked.

"Not _to_ you... not yet. But when he's talking to me or the kids, he refers to you as Mama, the same way they do."

"Oh..."

"You have been more of a mother to him than Yehra was," Riateh said.

"I don't know if that will comfort him when he's old enough to understand what she has done," Logan said sadly.

"He's going to grow up feeling loved and secure because he has you and John," Mitchell said.

"He need not even be told the details of Yehra's death, at least not right now. He is still far too young to understand any of this," Riateh pointed out.

"That's true," Sheppard agreed.

"What DO we tell him?" Logan asked.

"We tell him that she's gone to a better place?" he offered tentatively.

"He won't understand...Just like...Like..." she trailed off, tears streaming down her face.

Suddenly, it hit both Mitchell and Sheppard. She wasn't particularly upset about Yehra being gone, as she was over having to tell another small child that he'd lost a parent. Mitchell had been there when she'd had to tell her own children about John, and it damn near killed her.

"Nic and Chels...?" Sheppard asked.

Logan nodded miserably and buried her face in his chest. Riateh motioned to Mitchell that they should leave the two of them alone to deal with this. He stood up and came over to plant a tender kiss on the top of Logan's head, then took Riateh by the hand and led her from the room. Logan continued to cry for a while longer before finally getting herself under control.

"I'm sorry," she sniffled. "I thought I'd gotten past it..." she murmured softly.

"Hey, sweetie...You have NOTHING to apologize for. Yehra is a big reason why you even had to tell the kids I was gone in the first place."

Logan nodded. "Poor Tommy," she sniffled.

"I know this sounds cold, Sparks, but...He...probably won't even remember after a while. Cameron was right, he has you, and the fact that you were willing to take him in, as one of your own...THAT is going to mean so much more to him..."

"I hope you're right, John...For his sake."

THE FOLLOWING DAY

O'Neill found her, sitting huddled against the wind, at the end of the east pier. Her knees were drawn up to her chin and she had her arms wrapped around her legs as she sat there, gently rocking back and forth.

"Colonel?"

Logan jumped at the sound of his voice. "General!" she gasped, starting to get up.

"At ease, Colonel," he said, taking a seat next to her.

They hadn't had a chance to speak yet, following everything that had happened in the infirmary.

"Everything okay?" Logan asked.

"Peachy...You?" O'Neill smiled.

"I'm...not...sure..." she answered uncertainly.

"Had a feeling you might be a little...weirded out."

"I...yeah."

"Takes some getting used to," he said.

"To say the least!" she smiled. "Can I ask you something?"

"I didn't know I could do that either, Logan. Not until that moment when Daniel..."

She blinked in surprise. "I... really? Cause I know you healed Bra'tac before..."

"Yeah... But that was after I had my brain rewired by that ancient head-grabbing-repository-thingy."

"Oh...right..." she nodded. "Feels kinda..."

"Weird?" he finished for her, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah."

"See that! I'm not out here with you five minutes and you've already got me doing that weird... thing...you and Sheppard always do!" he teased.

Logan laughed, knowing he didn't hate that as much as he pretended to.

"It doesn't make you a freak, you know."

"Kinda feels that way."

"I know, I know...Face it Logan, we're SPECIAL!" he grinned sardonically.

"HAH!" she laughed.

"Seriously though, I am glad we were both there at the time... Judging by what happened...afterward...I don't think either one of us..."

"Could have healed them both..." she finished for him.

"Terrible choice to have to make. Though, probably more so for you, I'd imagine. You have a helluva lot of history there."

She looked up at him and nodded miserably. "I couldn't stand to lose either one of them."

"I know," he said softly and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

She leaned into him a bit and rested her head on his shoulder.

"I heard about Yehra."

"I can't believe she did that...I mean...Part of me does, she was totally delusional, but..." she trailed off and shook her head.

"You can't blame yourself, Logan."

"I let her out of the cell, Jack."

"To help Mitchell and Daniel."

"Yes, but... I should have known she wouldn't help them... She hates...HATED... me too much."

"Hard to keep that in mind when two people you love are on death's door, and you knew she had the power to save them. I was going to do the same thing."

She pulled back and looked up at him. "You were?"

"Told you, hanging out with you and Sheppard does weird things to a person..." he teased, pulling her back against him. "How did the boy take it?"

She shrugged. "He was... pretty calm, which is... sad, I think. It wasn't quite as hard as when I had to tell Nic and Chels about John."

"He's going to be okay, you know. From everything I know, or have heard, his life has GREATLY improved since coming to Atlantis. Honestly, Logan...I think he lost his mother long before he got here. And to be brutally honest, albeit completely callous, I think he traded up, when he got you."

"Jack!" she gasped.

"It's true. You love that kid as much as you do your own, and that's more rare than you might think, especially given the circumstances."

"None of that was his fault."

"Exactly. And the fact that you can see that, the fact that you can accept that and love him...It just proves my point. Now, I don't think the woman...Yehra...I'm not saying she deserved to die. I'm just saying...if there's anything good that came out of this whole mess, it's that Tommy has you."

"Thank you..."

"Care to hear some good news?"

"Always!" she grinned.

"Good... How would you and Sheppard feel about coming back to earth again, in...oh...about another month?"

"Uh... I'd say that depends on the WHY?" she eyed him warily.

"I want you to come to my...wedding!" he grinned.

"Wedding! _What_?!" she grinned. "You sly, silver fox... Who?"

"Sarah."

She blinked. "Sarah...O'Neill?" she asked.

"The once and future!" he nodded.

"WOW!" she hugged him fiercely. "That's so...GREAT, Jack...I'm happy for you!"

"Thanks! So, you'll come?" he asked.

"Yeah, sure, you betcha!" she grinned.

"Good...Try to keep it on the down-low, though...Don't want to raise a fuss."

"Understood... So, _how_ did this happen?" she asked.

O'Neill shrugged. "We've been talking... you know... keeping in touch and all... I never really got over her, you know. I don't know, maybe I was inspired."

"Uh-huh... By?"

"Well, I figured if you and John could, you know, put everything back together after all that... maybe Sarah and I could, too."

"And you did!" she beamed.

"That we did. So, for what it's worth, thank you!" he planted a quick kiss on the top of her head.

"You're welcome... And thanks for...you know...coming out here to talk to me..." she told him.

"And freezing my ass off in the process!" he teased. "Let's get back inside!" he stood up then reached down to take her hand and pull her to her feet.

The Alterrans held a quiet, dignified funeral service for Yehra within a few days of her death. Sheppard, Logan and Mitchell attended, to pay their respects to the woman she had once been, before her obsession had driven her better nature away. A few weeks after the service, Busek approached Logan tentatively and asked if he could speak with her. She invited him into her office and assured him that she harbored no ill will toward him over the actions of his long-time friend.

"You are most kind, Colonel Devane. I do not know many who would be so forgiving in your position."

"You did nothing wrong, Busek. How can I hold anything against you?"

"How is the boy?" he asked.

"He's doing remarkably well."

"That is good. He is happy?"

"Very. He adores his brothers and sisters and he seems to be thriving," she assured him.

"I am sure that much of that has to do with you, Colonel."

"Me?" she blinked at him.

"You opened your heart and home to the child of a woman who did such wrong to you."

"Tommy had nothing to do with that. He's an easy child to love."

"Indeed. He deserves better...than he got before."

"Well, he has all the love and support any child could possibly want now, and thensome!" she chuckled.

"That gives me great joy."

"For what it's worth...I am sorry about your friend. You must be devastated over losing someone so close to you. Someone you've known for most of your life."

"Indeed. Although, I think it is a fair assessment to say that I really lost her a long time ago...The moment her obsession took over. She really wasn't the same woman after that. I don't believe she ever could have come back to us again," he admitted sadly.

"I'm very sorry...I do understand that kind of loss."

He looked her right in the eye. "Yes. Because of what Yehra did."

"Yes. But... She is gone now, Busek. And I'm trying as hard as I can to hold on only to the fact that she was also responsible for healing John's wounds - for bringing him back from death's door. For that, I will always have gratitude in my heart for her. If not for her, I would have lost a lot more than three years with John."

"You are indeed most kind."

"Hardly, Busek. But I am a realist. Those are the facts. No matter how detestable her other deeds, she saved John's life. In my book, that negates a whole lotta bad."

"It is a shame she did not see who you really are."

"Thank you, but I think you give me too much credit," she shrugged.

"On the contrary," he smiled.

"You do know that you are welcome to be part of Tommy's life, right?"

"I was not sure..." he hesitated.

"You're a good man, Busek, and you care about him. There will come a time when he will need or want to know about Yehra, and there are things that only you can tell him - like how she was as a child and such."

"I...appreciate that..." he said gratefully.

"I promise you...I will always love him just as much as my other children."

"I believe that."

"Good. And I meant what I said; you are welcome to visit and spend time with him as you're able."

"Thank you, Colonel."

"In here," she indicated the closed room. "My friends call me Logan."

He smiled appreciatively. "I would be honored to be counted among your friends...Logan..."


	76. Chapter 76

Logan stood at the bottom of the stairs and watched as the jumper lowered into the gateroom and paused before the open wormhole.

"We'll check in within the hour, ma'am," Lorne's voice crackled over the radio.

"I'm counting on it, Lorne," Logan replied.

A heartbeat later, the jumper vanished through the gate. She had already turned to head back up the stairs when she caught a sudden movement out of the corner of her eye. She whirled around in time to see a small boy, Terbus, disappear through the still open wormhole.

"Terbus!" his Uncle called out, too late.

"Hold Heru! I'll get him," Logan called out.

"Ma'am?" Collins asked uncertainly.

"Look, he knows me. I'll just go and get him and then turn around and dial back home again. The kid knew his father was in that jumper, Collins." She was already jogging toward the event horizon. "Be right back!" she called out and disappeared.

On the other side, she could see Terbus still running as fast as his little legs would carry him. Which, given the distance he'd covered already, was pretty darn fast. He was already a good forty yards ahead of her.

"Terbus!" she called out.

Before she could take another step, something sharp jammed into her thigh. Looking down, she saw a tiny metal protuberance imbedded in her upper, outer thigh. As she reached for it, the world began to spin, slowly at first.

"Tranq!" she scolded herself.

She immediately keyed her mike. "Collins! Trap! Send in the cavalry!"

She wasn't even sure she'd gotten all the words out, as things seemed to be moving very slowly from her perspective. What did register, however, was the fact that the gate had just shut down. She stumbled forward toward the DHD when she saw him. Of _course_ , she thought, it would have to be THEM! She reached for her sidearm, getting her zat instead, and as she took aim at the uniformed man at the DHD, someone grabbed her from behind and knocked the zat from her already shaky grasp.

"Shit!" she cried, instinctively doubling over and sending her assailant crashing to the ground.

Unfortunately, she too, found herself on the ground, queasy and weakened from the tranq. Before she could get her feet completely under her, two more people grabbed her and began trying to subdue her. Logan fought like a woman possessed. 'Not these guys,' was all she could think. She managed to throw off those two, but there were more to take their place. A lot more, unless her vision was doubling, no... quadrupling.

She fought them off as best she could, for as long as she could, but as it turned out, it wasn't long enough. The tranq worked quickly, too quickly. Within moments, Logan had been rendered completely unconscious. The leader of the group that had ambushed her quickly ordered his men to retreat through the gate while he picked up and slung her limp form over his shoulder.

In New Lantea, alarms were blaring and Collins was nearly frantic as Poe tried and tried to establish a wormhole back to the planet. It took four tries for them to finally establish a wormhole and by this time, he had an entire platoon ready to go through. He sent them through without hesitation, but what they reported from the other side had made his blood run cold.

"What?" he croaked.

"She's not here... There are signs of a struggle, and the Colonel's P-90... No sign of _her_ or the kid. Jumper one hasn't been able to pick up any signals either."

Poe looked over at the ashen-faced Collins. "They might have opened a wormhole to another planet, sir... Probably why we couldn't get a lock for so long..."

Collins nodded. The last thing he wanted was to lose someone on his watch, if ever, but having to face Colonel Sheppard now? He shuddered... _And_ Colonel Mitchell... Not to mention General Caldwell. Why hadn't he insisted on going after the kid himself?

"Sir?" Poe prodded.

"Yes... Forrest, keep looking. We'll send in reinforcements," Collins said over the radio, then turned to point at Heru. "Detain him."

"Yes sir," Forrest replied.

"Airman... Get me General Caldwell... And have the remaining rebels restricted to quarters as well!"

"Aye sir!" Poe said.

UNKNOWN PLANET

It was dark when she opened her eyes. Had she opened her eyes? She wasn't sure at first. She concentrated on blinking her eyes a few times, just in case. Yep. She was right the first time: it was dark. Her head was pounding and her stomach was roiling rebelliously. Whatever it was that had been in that tranq, it sure packed a powerful punch. As she moved to brush a stray strand of hair from her face, she noticed that her wrists had been shackled to... something...

Closing her eyes, she tried to focus on the sounds around her. She could hear the sound of heavy machinery in the distance. Weird. Wherever she was, it smelled awful. She lay still and tried to will her stomach to calm its incessant churning. The last thing she wanted to do when meeting her captors face to face was to show any kind of weakness. Then again, if she did vomit all over their shiny boots, well... they had _that_ coming, at the very least!

The noise from the heavy machinery was only adding to the pounding in her head, and quite frankly, that was pissing her off. She wondered what had happened to the sweet little Terbus, who had, no doubt, unwittingly led her right into the nice little trap they'd set for her. She trusted the boy's father, as much as she'd been able to bring herself to trust any of the rebels, and she would be very surprised if he had been involved in setting her up. He had almost as much reason to hate the Genii leaders as the Lanteans did.

The sudden, distinct sound of booted footsteps approaching caught her attention. More than one man, she guessed... Five or six maybe... She listened and waited as the footsteps drew closer. She knew she couldn't put up much of a fight, shackled and weak as she was at the moment. Better to wait until all the effects of the drug wore off before even thinking about trying to escape. A door to her right creaked open and a sudden bright light assaulted her senses and brought a fresh new pounding to her head. She forced herself not to cry out as several people entered the room. She did not, _could not_ really, look up into their faces. Not just yet anyway.

"I see we're awake," said a condescending voice.

"Clearly," she replied.

"The effects of the drug should wear off by morning," he assured her.

"Swell," she said.

"I would apologize for the discomfort you are feeling, but I think we both know I wouldn't be sincere."

"Obviously," she agreed.

"Is it safe to assume that you know whose hospitality it is that you are currently enjoying?"

"Well, I wouldn't go straight to HOSPITALLITY or ENJOYING," she hissed. "But yeah... I know..."

"I have to be honest, I really wasn't expecting someone of YOUR importance to come through the ring, so imagine my surprise when my little trap turned up such a big prize!" he grinned wickedly.

"Are you calling me _fat_?!" she quipped.

"Hardly," he chuckled inspite of himself. "In fact, I have heard tell of your beauty, how it has driven good men, good soldiers, to lose sight of their objective... I must say though, even under your current circumstances... Those tales failed to do you proper justice."

"I'd take that as a compliment, if it weren't coming from you," she hissed.

"Tell me, my good Colonel Devane... Do you know EXACTLy to whom it is you speak?" he asked.

"I'd have to hazard a guess, but you could only be the one called... Cowan." she said.

"You are very astute, aren't you?"

"I've been told that once or twice," she admitted.

"I'm sure... Yes, my name IS Cowan, and YOU will be my guest for the foreseeable future."

"And by guest, you mean _prisoner_..."

"As you wish."

"No offense, Cowan, but if you were actually TRYING to make the single most BONE-HEADED mistake ever, you managed to accomplish it. Congratulations."

"Is that so?" he grinned.

"Oh yeah."

"I assume you're about to threaten me with retribution from your mate... Colonel Sheppard?"

"HAH! That's not a _threat_ , Cowan, that's a _promise_ , but I was going to say... he won't be alone when he comes..."

"No?" he taunted her.

"No... But this is it. My people have left you alone far too many times in the past, when we could have simply wiped you from the face of the planet. No more chances... You're a lost cause."

"So your people will go to war now... Over YOU?!" he scoffed.

"Not _me_... The principle... Humans all over this galaxy have enough to worry about from the Wraith, Cowan, they shouldn't have to worry about you, too!"

"Seems to me, I've heard that before."

"I'm sure."

"Nevertheless... With such a high value bargaining chip, I think I like my chances in this negotiation."

"You're an even bigger fool than I was told," she hissed.

Sheppard, Mitchell and Caldwell were pacing like caged animals as Collins filled them in on what had happened. Though, what he did know was very little.

"I would have gone, but she insisted, sirs... Just a quick hop out to get the kid and right back... As soon as we got the distress call the gate shut down and we tried dialing out immediately, but we couldn't get a lock."

"So their dialing fingers were faster than yours?" Mitchell asked snarkily.

"I'm... afraid so, sir."

"And that's all she said?" Sheppard asked.

"Yes, sir... She sounded...funny..."

"What do you mean?" Sheppard pounced.

"Like she was drunk or..."

"Drugged?!" Sheppard cut him off.

"Yes, sir."

Sheppard shook his head angrily. "Probably tranq'd her the minute she stepped through the gate!" he snarled.

"McKay and Zelenka are working on the DHD..."

"Why do I get the feeling this is going to be like when we had to turn the galaxy upside down to find the kids?" Sheppard asked Mitchell.

"Right there with ya, man."

"Colonels?" Caldwell said.

"Sir?" they replied.

"Why don't you go see how Bates is doing with the rebels?" he said.

"Good idea... Whose kid was it that lured her off-world?" Sheppard asked.

"Zerim... But he was in the jumper with Lt. Colonel Lorne. We figured that was why the kid went chasing after it in the first place."

"Anyone else here related to the kid?" Mitchell asked. "

"Heru... the kids' Uncle. He seems to be really broken up about this though."

"Yeah well... he _will be_ if he had anything to do with setting that trap!" Sheppard said menacingly.

Collins nodded knowingly. He sure would hate to be the one responsible for kidnapping Colonel Devane. Sheppard was out for blood now, and looked quite capable of killing anyone who stood in the way of him finding and rescuing his wife.

When they reached the room where Bates was interrogating Heru, they could see that he, too, was pacing like a caged animal. He was barely holding himself back, when it was obvious that he wanted to literally beat the truth out of the Genii rebel.

"I am telling you the truth. I had nothing to do with setting that trap, or even plotting to. Colonel Devane was not even supposed to be here today."

That much was true. Lieutenant Evers, who headed up security on New Lantea, had taken ill and Logan had been called in to check on base security measures prior to the arrival of the rebels for the strategy meeting.

"It was your nephew who lured her off-world!" Bates yelled.

"Yes, yes! I do not know what came over him. He was fine and then... as soon as your ship went through the ring, he suddenly bolted out of my grasp and ran for the ring... He is only a child, but three years of age. He could no more be a part of this than my brother or I. We have many reasons to hate Cowan and his ilk; we would never help them."

"But someone DID!" Bates shouted again.

Sheppard entered the room and slowly circled Heru. "Lieutenant Bates is right, Heru... SOMEONE did, and when I find out who it was..."

"I am well aware of your reputation as a warrior, Colonel Sheppard. It is one of the many reasons we sought an alliance with your people."

"Alright. You claim to be innocent in this... Tell me what YOU think happened."

"I wish I knew," Heru murmured. "Everyone here is completely loyal to the rebellion. Everyone here HATES the current regime, for good cause. There is not a single one among us who would help that regime, and we are the only ones, among the rebels, who knew where Lorne was taking them today."

"So you can see why we would be suspicious?" Mitchell asked.

"Yes. I am afraid so."

"Again... what do you _think_ happened? Did they just happen to have a team on that planet, at that moment, lucky enough to have Colonel Devane stumble into their midst?"

"I suppose that is possible..."

"But not likely...This was too well organized for that to be the case, and what happened to the kid?"

"I do not know..."

"Wouldn't be the first time they've used a child to strike at us," Mitchell pointed out.

"I know..." Heru hung his head sadly. "Does my brother know? Has he returned?"

"He knows that his son is missing, and yes, he has returned. He's being questioned as well."

"The child's mother?"

"His mother?" Sheppard and Mitchell exchanged glances. "If he has a mother, why didn't he remain behind with her, rather than coming with you to this meeting?"

"She was ill and unable to care for him."

"Where is she now?" Mitchell demanded.

"At home. She is not well enough to travel."

Sheppard whispered something to Bates, who immediately left the room.

"What is it?" Heru asked.

"We're sending someone to check on her." Sheppard replied.

"Check on her?"

"Yes. Tell me something... Did she know what was happening today?" Mitchell asked.

"I...no... My brother never spoke of these plans to her, for her own safety."

"So that if she happened to be captured..." Sheppard began.

"She wouldn't be able to tell them anything..." Mitchell finished. "Did he speak about these meetings anywhere near his son?"

"I do not think so... But Terbus is so young. He would not understand."

"No... But he could repeat names...of people, planets..." Sheppard theorized.

"To who?" Heru asked, appalled.

"His mother perhaps?" Mitchell ventured.

"You believe her to be involved?"

"You don't?" Sheppard asked.

Heru thought for a moment. "She has always lived in fear of Cowan and his lackeys... She would not..."

"Fear can be a powerful motivator," Mitchell pointed out.

"To betray her own husband...?"

"You tell us..." Sheppard said.

"I...I...do...not...know..." he admitted finally.

GENII

It took quite a while for the worst effects of the drug to begin wearing off, but once they did, Logan wasn't sure if she were better off or not. Her headache seemed to get worse as her head cleared and her limbs were weak and shaky. Several hours had passed since Cowan and his people left, and she'd managed to sleep during some of that time. It was a little lighter now where they kept her, at least she could make out and mark her surroundings. That would help if she managed to free herself and make a run for it.

"I wouldn't bother," came a soft, female voice down the hall.

"Is that so?" Logan replied.

"There is no way to get out."

"And I should take my...guard's...word on that?"

"I am no guard... Though I once served in the military. I'm a prisoner, just like you."

The womans tone was bitter and defeated.

"Sora?" Logan asked.

A soft gasp told her she was right. "Y...yes..."

"Have you been a prisoner since Dr. Weir released you back to your own people?"

"For almost that long, yes... Have we met before?" Sora asked curiously.

"No...But you've met my husband...My mate..."

"John Sheppard is your mate?"

"Yes he is..."

"He was not mated when last I saw him," she said wistfully.

"I arrived here after all...that..."

"Was not the stargate destroyed along with Atlantis?"

"Of course."

"To prevent the Wraith from reaching your home galaxy."

"Right."

"Then how... I thought the Atlantis gate was the only one capable of reaching your home galaxy from here."

"It is...was... But there are many gates where we come from. As long as there is sufficient power any one of them is capable of reaching Pegasus. That...and we have...other means...of traveling between here and there."

"I have heard them speak of a powerful ship that you have."

"We have more than one...and it's more than capable of blowing this facility off the planet, if need be."

"Something you could have done long ago."

"Yeah... See what we get for being so... compassionate?"

"I would have expected you to say stupid," Sora smiled in spite of herself.

"There are times when I've felt that way. Sora, why are they keeping you locked up?"

"They see me as a traitor," she replied bitterly.

"Why?"

"Because I tried to convince them that they were wrong about your people. They accused me of being brainwashed..."

"You had to know they wouldn't listen. Not anyone with any real power anyway."

"I had to try... It was the right thing to do."

"Cowan and his men don't care about that," Logan reminded her.

"I know...I tried to join the resistance, but I was taken into custody before I could meet up with them."

"Don't take this the wrong way, Sora, but why didn't they kill you? Cowan doesn't take kindly to...rebellion."

"He believes that I might provide some useful information, some day..."

"About Atlantis? The city was destroyed..."

"About your people. Cowan had hoped that the Wraith would destroy your people outright, and use the stargate to leave this galaxy altogether. When that didn't happen, when they learned about the fate of the city and that your people survived and escaped..."

"He still wants our technology."

"Of course. But even more than that...I believe he would like to see your people dead, or at least defeated and under Genii rule."

"Starting with my husband."

"Undoubtedly."

"And now that he has me..."

"I do not believe YOU specifically are the one he was trying to snare, I don't think he much cared who it was as long as it gave him leverage... Capturing you, though... That is better than he could have possibly hoped for."

"Peachy!" Logan murmured. "Well then, we're just going to have to get the hell outta Dodge!"

"Dodge? We?" Sora asked, confused.

"I'll explain it to you once we get out of here... And, yes, WE! You don't really think I'd leave you behind?"

"I...don't see any way for either of us to get out."

"My people have a saying: 'Where there's a will, there's a way.' I think we have enough will between us to find a way to escape, don't you?"

"I did not before... But you almost make me believe..."

"Believe it, Sora...I have no intention of being Cowan's bargaining chip. Can you tell me what planet we're on? Is it your homeworld or another base?"

"It is my homeworld. They believe the interference coming from the underground bunker, the radiation...They think it will hide you from your ship's sensors."

"It might... All the more reason why we need to get away from here."

"I am shackled... I imagine you are as well?"

"Yeah... Do they ever unshackle you?"

"Yes, sometimes."

"Excellent!"

"You will be heavily guarded."

"I can handle myself in a fight. And from what I understand, you can, too."

"It has been many days since I have trained or fought."

"Some things you never forget... Now, let's focus on how to get out of here once the shackles come off and we take out the guards..."

ATLANTIS

Sheppard looked at McKay uncertainly. "Are you sure?"

"Yes...why?"

"Well, it seems a bit obvious, doesn't it?" Sheppard shrugged.

"What do you mean?" McKay asked defensively.

"Their home planet would be the first place we'd go looking...They have to know that, so..."

"Why take her there?" Mitchell finished for him.

"Right."

McKay shook his head. "I don't know. All I can tell you is what I got off the DHD. Besides, it doesn't look like they even expected to acquire such a high value prisoner, so they might not have expected us to come full-force at them."

"That or they felt more secure on their home turf," Mitchell added.

"That too," McKay said.

"I don't suppose there's any chance they don't know who they really have?" Sheppard asked.

"She was in uniform... Even if the people who have her don't know her face, they know the name."

"Yeah... I figured it was too much to hope for. So, we go in!" Sheppard said decisively.

"You do," Caldwell confirmed. "But this time... We end it once and for all."

"Sir?" Mitchell and Sheppard asked together.

"What?" asked McKay.

"If she's on their homeworld... Hell... Let's face facts gentlemen, the fact that they took ANYONE, much less Logan... They're prepared to make their stand. Even Cowan has to know that he can't keep pushing like this without repercussions."

"I agree," Sheppard said.

"So the timetable for the coup has just been moved up. We go in hard, fast and with everything we've got."

"Works for me," Sheppard agreed enthusiastically.

"Are we going to wipe them all out?" McKay asked uncomfortably.

"Strictly military targets, Doctor, as always. Tell me something though, from everything you know about their technology, this bunker of theirs, how well protected would they be from the Daedalus sensors?"

"The radiation would render the sensors useless, if they haven't shut everything down. The only thing that saved them from total annihilation from the Wraith was that they were able to power everything down in time to avoid detection. If they're at full power, the sensors wouldn't be able to detect life signs, just a power source."

"But we already know where the bunker is, so finding them wouldn't be a problem."

"They'll be well fortified, though." Mitchell pointed out.

"What I was hoping for was to be able to use the transporter to beam Cowan and his people directly to the Daedalus brig, to minimize casualties."

"We wouldn't be able to differentiate life signs on the planet, even if we managed to knock out their power systems," McKay informed him.

"That can all be sorted out once they're on board," Caldwell replied.

"We don't want to beam Logan into a cell with them," Sheppard began to protest.

"I'm hoping that once she knows we're there, she'll find a way to let us know where she is."

"If she's not still drugged..." Sheppard murmured.

"You, of all people, know better than to underestimate her John," Caldwell pointed out.

"Yeah..."

"Let's work this through, people," Caldwell ordered. "I want a solid plan in place within two hours. And we're going to have to bring Roth and his people in on this."

"Sir!" Mitchell and Sheppard began to protest.

Caldwell held up a hand to head off their arguments. "We've been working with him for a long time now. They're the ones who are going to be taking control of the Genii government once the dust settles. For all intents and purposes, we've already agreed to back them as the new government..."

"Why do I feel like this is just out of the frying pan and into the fire?" Sheppard asked.

"That may very well be. But at least WE will be in control at the beginning. WE never agreed on WHEN we would turn over complete control and withdraw our people. If they prove to be as loyal as they appear to be now, there'll be no reason for us to stay beyond securing them into power. Once it's all said and done, their military will be significantly reduced anyway. They shouldn't be a threat to us for a long time to come."

GENII

Logan gritted her teeth as she heard the telltale sound of combat boots approaching. She'd hoped to have more time to work on the shackles binding her to the cot. She was surprised to see just two rather low-level soldiers enter her cell. They seemed more nervous than they should have felt, given the obvious advantage they had over her, and that immediately set off the warning bells in her head.

"Hey guys!" she greeted casually. "What's up?"

"You seem quite glib for someone in your position," one of them said.

"What?! Me, worry?!" she scoffed.

"You weren't exaggerating Pius, she is very... fetching..." the other leered down at her.

Great, Logan thought. She'd had a feeling, but there were times when she hated being right. "Does that mean you're here to let me go?" she asked.

"Let you go?" not-Pius scoffed. "Why would we do that when we have you in such a position?"

"You have been told that I'm a married woman, right? Married with children, in fact?"

"You think that matters to us?" not-Pius leered again. "A soldier's life is a lonely one..." he murmured.

"Riiiight...Well...Perhaps you should go out and find your own wife...or will none of your own women have you?"

Probably shouldn't be taunting him like that, but she was really getting sick of the Genii penchant for wanting to force themselves on women.

"There is not a single woman on this planet who can hold a candle to your beauty," Pius said.

"I could take that as a compliment if it didn't come from you," she muttered.

"I go first, Cray... You keep watch..." Pius said, putting down his weapon and reaching for his belt.

"Why do you get to have her first?" Cray protested.

"Does Cowan know you're doing this?" Logan asked, trying not to sound at all nervous. "Even HE is afraid of my husband."

"Cowan fears no one," Pius said.

"Ever heard the name John Sheppard?" she asked.

They took a step back and exchanged nervous glances. "Yes."

"He is my husband... Isn't that right, Sora?" she called out.

"She speaks the truth," replied Sora.

"He is not here... And there is no way for him to save you even if he came!" Cray blustered.

"Enough!" Pius hissed and crossed the room toward her.

Her feet were not shackled so she kicked out at his groin the instant he got close enough. Pius cried out in pain and sank to his knees. Cray lunged forward as well, only to meet the same fate. Logan pulled on the shackles with all her might, but they wouldn't come free from the wooden frame of her cot. Both men were fully enraged now and had managed to get their feet under them. They came at her from both sides and Logan felt the first twinges of fear. Fear that she might just not be able to fight them off.

Kicking and thrashing as hard as she could, she managed to hold them at bay for only a moment. When Pius finally managed to get a hand on her right leg, she screamed in rage. Her fear mixed with that rage and boiled over. All she wanted at that moment was to get them away from her and, suddenly, both men rose off the ground, gasping in surprise, then they were hurled by some unseen force through the air. They landed with a huge thud against the wall and fell to the floor unconscious.

It took her a moment to realize what had happened as she lay there, breathing heavily. She had done that. She knew it. She didn't know _how_ , but she knew she'd done it. She immediately thought back to the day Yehra had escaped from the infirmary by doing the same thing to her, O'Neill and the others. Rather than question it, she decided to go with the flow and see what else she could accomplish. She closed her eyes and focused her mind on the locking mechanism of her shackles. If she could just... A sudden metallic click made her eyes pop open and she stared in astonishment at the open shackles on her wrists.

"That was too easy," she murmured to herself.

Sora was being awfully quiet, she thought. She wondered if her mental outburst had inadvertantly caught her, too.

"Sora?" she called out as she got up off the cot.

"I am...here...What just happened?"

"Beavis and Butthead are down..." she replied. "Hang on, I'll get you out."

She found the keys and hurried down the hall to find her fellow prisoner. "Which one are you in?" she asked.

"Here..." Sora called out.

She found the right door and tried each key until she found the right one. As soon as she opened the door, she rushed inside and quickly began working to unlock Sora's shackles.

"How did you get free?" Sora asked.

"Skill," Logan replied. "Come on!" she tossed Sora's shackless aside and started for the door.

"How do you expect to get out of here? There will be more guards posted the closer we get to the surface!"

Logan shrugged. "We'll jump off that bridge when we come to it."


	77. Chapter 77

Before leaving the detention cells, Logan went back and dragged the offensive guards out of sight, behind her cot. She took all the weapons they had on them, as well as their communication devices and then bound and gagged them. It took a little more time than she wanted to waste on them, but it was better to keep them quiet when they woke up, in case they had a hard time escaping from the building.

Logan had no illusions about fighting off hordes of Genii soldiers. In fact, all she wanted right now was to get the hell out of there and through the gate. She handed Sora one gun and kept the others for herself. She allowed Sora to lead them cautiously through the building where they'd been held, but only because she'd never been there before and Sora knew her way around. Once they were out in the open, Logan would again take the lead. Once she got a look at her in the light, Sora was not at all what she had pictured. She was young, petite and pretty. Definitely not a hardened soldier, but then again, Logan's own looks were deceiving, so she didn't underestimate Sora's abilities.

Three times they'd had to hide from passersby, but thus far, they'd managed to remain undetected. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, they emerged from the building and into the bright sunlight. Logan pulled her into some nearby brush at the rear of the building, so they could hide until she got her bearings.

"Which way to the gate?" Logan asked.

Sora pointed. "That way... But much of the way is open ground, there is very little cover."

"Any idea what time it is?"

"I have no timekeeper," Sora replied.

"Can you tell by the position of the sun?" Logan pressed.

"Early afternoon, at best."

"Great..." Logan huffed.

ATLANTIS

O'Neill surveyed the vast array of soldiers who would soon be pouring through the stargate to launch an attack on the Genii homeworld. The Daedalus was already nearing the planet and, once in position, both 302's and puddle jumpers would be dispatched to begin the aerial assault. Forces from ten of the outposts they'd established in the Pegasus galaxy would also be deploying within moments of the first wave sent by Atlantis.

They had a good plan in place, and they were pretty sure that a victory could be won before a single boot set foot on Genii ground. Sheppard would be commanding the jumper squadron and Mitchell, the 302 squadron from the Daedalus. Caldwell was also on board the Daedalus, while O'Neill, who had come in from Earth, would be coordinating the attack from Atlantis.

For his part, on New Lantea, Roth watched in awe as the earthlings prepared for the assault. There was a time when the Genii had been a formidable people. They'd controlled a vast expanse of the universe, as leaders of a powerful coalition of planets. But even back then, Roth doubted that the Genii had anything rivaling that which he was seeing now. He knew there were ships and soldiers coming from other cities, other bases, scattered across the galaxy, but he did not know where they originated, or how many there would be. He had been promised that there would be more than enough troops to defeat the current regime and establish the new one.

While Roth had never once considered going against his new allies, he knew now that such an attempt would be even more foolish than he could have possibly imagined. He believed, before, that the earthlings had the power to completely destroy the Genii, but now he KNEW it for a fact. And all he'd really seen was the one strike force who was preparing to deploy from New Lantea. He'd promised Generals Caldwell and O'Neill that HIS new regime would never turn against them, and that they would always work together with them to try and defeat the Wraith once and for all.

"Last chance to back out," Bates warned.

Roth looked over at his small band of rebels standing a few feet away. "No thank you. This may be happening far sooner than I imagined, but it has been a long time coming. We need to end it, once and for all."

"This ought to do the trick then," Bates grinned, eager to engage the enemy.

"I should say so," Roth grinned back.

Back in Atlantis, Weir was speaking in hushed tones with O'Neill when the radio communication came through from the Daedalus.

"General O'Neill, this is Caldwell. The Daedalus is in position and ready to launch."

"Roger that, General. Don't suppose you've picked up any sign of Colonel Devane on the ground?"

Caldwell's jaw tightened and his expression grew deadly serious. "No, General, not yet, but we are continuing to scan the surface, just in case."

"Understood," O'Neill grimaced. "General Caldwell, you have a go."

Caldwell took a deep breath and blew it out. "Colonel Mitchell, you have a go. Clear the gate area first and make sure our people get through."

"Yes sir," Mitchell replied.

"Launch fighters," Caldwell commanded.

GENII

"I think I know a way," Sora said.

"You THINK?" Logan asked.

"Most everyone should be occupied inside the buildings right now. It is possible that we can go the long way around without being detected."

"I'm trusting you here," Logan warned.

"Come," she smiled and began leading Logan along behind the buildings.

Very quickly, Logan began to feel very apprehensive about where Sora was leading her. They seemed to be getting closer to the village instead of away, toward the gate.

"Stop," Logan reached out and grabbed Sora by the arm.

"What is it?"

"This isn't the direction we shold be going."

"I told you, we must take the long way around, to avoid detection."

"How long is the long way?" she asked suspiciously.

"As long as it takes for us to catch up to you," Cowan said from behind her.

Logan nodded. "I had a feeling," she muttered, glaring hatefully at Sora.

"Isn't that always your people's downfall, Colonel Devane? Trusting too easily?" Cowan asked.

"It might be... But when we go down, we don't tend to stay down. And we don't go down alone."

"No? We shall see... Hand over the weapons you took from my men."

Logan stood her ground without moving to do as he asked.

"How did you manage to get out, by the way?" he asked.

"She said it was skill," Sora answered for her.

"Impressive. My men are still unconscious." He turned to Sora. "Did you not see how she managed it?"

"No... But she must have gotten the key from one of them when they..." she trailed off.

"When they what?" he asked.

"When they tried to force themselves on her," she admitted warily.

"They...No...My men would never..."

The sound of Logan's humorless laughter cut him off. "Oh yes, they would, and they _did_...TRY that is."

Cowan's face reddened with anger and a hint of embarrassment. "If what you say is true, and I highly doubt that, then they got what was coming to them."

"I think so... Didn't think you would, though," she studied him curiously for a moment.

"You can believe what you want about me, but I don't condone... such behavior."

Logan cocked her head to one side. "I'll be damned... I actually believe you mean that, Cowan."

"Be that as it may, I'll ask you again to return the weapons you stole."

"I don't think so," Logan replied.

"Colonel, skilled though you may be, you are greatly outnumbered."

"Maybe so, maybe so... But I was outnumbered AND shackled in that cell, and I still managed to get out. Maybe you shouldn't underestimate me."

"Take her!" Cowan ordered.

Four men, and Sora moved toward her and in an instant, they were all flung backwards by some unseen force. Cowan took a few steps backwards, gaping at her in disbelief. Suddenly, his own gun flew out of his hand and into hers. Logan smiled and arched an eyebrow at him. Later, when she was home and safe she would look back and allow herself the luxury of freaking out, but for right now, she simply enjoyed scaring the daylights out of Cowan and his people.

"How did you...?" Cowan stammered.

"Did I forget to mention that some of my people possess the powers of the Ancients?" she taunted.

"That's not possible..." his face paled.

"I happen to be one of them," she smiled.

Before Cowan could reply, they were all thrown to the ground by the force of several powerful explosions off in the distance.

"What is..." Cowan began.

Logan sprang to her feet, a triumphant smile on her face. "That, Cowan, is the sound of a revolution!" she replied.

"The rebels don't have that kind of firepower!" he shouted up at her.

"No... But WE do," she grinned, catching sight of a 302 far off in the distance. "Goodbye, Cowan."

Logan began running full-speed in the direction of the gate, though she had to stop several times, when she was knocked off her feet by the impact of bombs hitting the ground. She knew that the 302's would only be the first wave of the assault. She guessed that they were sent to secure access, or rather safe passage, through the gate. Since they'd taken her communicator from her, she knew her best chance of a rescue would be to get to the gate area and try to flag down one of the 302's or a jumper.

Massive explosions rocked the underground compound where the Genii scientists worked to build their weapons arsenal. The attack had come far sooner than Cowan had believed it would. In fact, he had told them that the earthlings or Lanteans would try to negotiate first, for the release of their Colonel Devane. Cowan had greatly underestimated them. Or else he had overestimated their patience.

Either way, the Genii homeworld was in total chaos. The village remained safe from attack, but not the surrounding areas. In fact, the village was completely cut off. 302's were making sure no one could get out of the village by periodically dropping ordinances around the outskirts, which essentially kept the civilians safely enclosed. It also served to prevent any military personnel from being able to reach the other troops.

At first, many Genii soldiers tried to make a run for the gate, in an effort to escape the attack, but they were quickly forced back by the 302's guarding the immediate area around the gate. Still some distance from the gate, Logan had as yet been unable to get close enough to flag down any of her ships. Nevertheless, she kept running toward the gate as fast as she could. As she was about to emerge from a thick stand of brush, Sora somehow managed to catch up to her.

She tackled her from behind, completely taking her by surprise and knocking the gun out of her hand as she fell forward. They hit the ground with a thud and immediately began wrestling for control of Sora's weapon. Logan easily managed to get the upper hand and threw Sora off her. Sora rolled several feet away, then drew a knife out of her boot sheath and stood up to come at her again.

"Oh come ON!" Logan said, clearly exasperated. "You wanna do _this_ in the middle of all _that_?!" she pointed up at the ships in the sky.

Before Sora could answer, Logan was hit from behind with a full blast from a Wraith stunner. Sora slowly moved over to where Logan now lay helpless on the ground and smiled down at her.

"Not so mighty after all..." she smirked.

"At least we still have a bargaining chip," Cowan sneered.

Just as Cowan began to bend down, toward Logan's still form, there was a bright flash of light and both Cowan and Sora vanished from the surface. Mitchell, from his vantage point in his 302, smiled victoriously.

"Now THAT'S timing!" he whooped.

"Where is she?" Sheppard's voice sounded in his headset.

Mitchell sent him the coordinates before replying. "I'll circle her position until you land and get her aboard."

Sheppard checked his console and headed straight for the coordinates Mitchell had given him. Moments later he was able to make out Logan's body still laying motionless on the ground. Mitchell rocked his 302 from side to side, once Sheppard landed the jumper, then climbed higher and continued circling the area.

Sheppard lowered the hatch and, P-90 in hand, he hurried down the ramp. He'd landed the jumper only about fifteen feet from her, so it didn't take long to reach her side. Her eyes were closed, but she had a steady pulse and appeared otherwise uninjured. Without a moments hesitation, he scooped Logan up into his arms and ran back to his jumper.

Once on board, he quickly closed the hatch and then laid her down on one of the bench seats. He checked her over more thoroughly for any sign of other injuries, but it looked like she'd just fallen victim to one of the stunner weapons. Assured that she was physically alright, albeit stunned, he secured her onto the seat with the seatbelts and jumped back in the pilots seat. He'd been on the ground for less than five minutes, but he didn't want to give some Genii soldier a chance at a lucky shot to bring down or disable the jumper. He lifted off and headed straight for the gate.

"She okay?" Mitchell asked, deeply concerned.

"Yeah... She took a stunner blast though," Sheppard replied.

"Get her back... home..." Caldwell ordered. He'd almost said 'Atlantis'.

"On my way, sir."

"Make sure there are no hostiles near the gate when you dial out. The last thing we need back home are a bunch of hostile Genii running around the city," Caldwell cautioned.

"Is there any other kind, sir?" Sheppard quipped.

"I've got their six, sir," Mitchell chimed in.

"And Sheppard?"

"Yes sir?"

"I'm sorry, but you've got to turn right around and come back to the party, as soon as she's safe."

"I..." he grimaced, torn between his love for Logan and his duty. "Yes, sir."

"Don't worry, Colonel. It doesn't look like this'll take long."

"Yes sir... Sheppard out," he muttered.

As he neared the gate, he dialed to coordinates for Atlantis. Several unfortunate Genii made a break for the open wormhole before he even had a chance to enter his IDC code, so all they'd accomplished for themselves was a quick, certain death. Mitchell flew ahead of him and began strafing the surrounding area, to discourage anyone else from trying to escape through the gate.

"All clear, John!" Mitchell told him.

Sheppard entered his IDC, waited a heartbeat, then flew into the wormhole.

O'Neill had been surprised that Sheppard was returning so soon, but he ordered the shield to be lowered as soon as the IDC code was received. A medical team was already on standby in the gateroom, in case they'd had to shuttle wounded personnel back from the Genii planet. As it turned out, Logan had been the only one, so far, to need their services.

She was still unconscious as they loaded her onto a gurney to take her to the infirmary, and it was killing Sheppard not to be able to go with her. But, he knew she'd be the first person to tell him to go back to the battle, and not to let their relationship interfere with his duties. With supreme effort, he forced himself to remain on the jumper and, as soon as they cleared the room, he returned to the pilots seat and started up the jumper again. As he lifted off the floor of the gateroom, he heard O'Neill's voice crackle over his headset.

"Don't worry, son... I'll make sure she's taken care of."

"Thank you, sir," he murmured appreciatively, then accelerated through the event horizon.

DAEDALUS

Cowan was apoplectic with rage when Caldwell entered the brig to confront him.

"How dare you...You cannot...to simply...You cannot just snap people up and take them away..."

Caldwell grinned wryly, arching an eyebrow at his hypocrisy. "Why not? YOU did."

Cowan stared at him, open-mouthed. "She was on a neutral planet, I was on my own homeworld!" he countered.

"Semantics, Cowan. Did you really think I would let you use her as a bargaining tool?"

"All is fair in war..." he realized that he didn't know the mans' name.

"Caldwell. General Steven Caldwell. We've never met before, but then... meeting you now, I can see that I wasn't really missing anything."

"You are as arrogant as your subordinate, Colonel Sheppard."

Caldwell snorted. "Sheppard may be many things, but arrogant is not one of them."

"I demand that you release me at once!" Cowan shouted in fury.

"Oh... we'll get to that..."

That took the wind out of Cowans' sails. "You... intend to release me?"

"You don't think I want to have you around indefinitely, do you?" Caldwell frowned at him.

"I... am I to be used as a bargaining chip then?"

"You have no value, Cowan. Not to us, nor to our allies."

"Allies? What... allies?" he asked.

"The rebels who brought about this little Coup de 'Etat. Come to think of it, you may have SOME value to them...I believe their plans include putting you on trial for crimes against the Genii people... or something like that," Caldwell said airily.

"You have no right!"

"I have EVERY right, you sanctimonious piece of sh*t! For years my people have tried to work with you, to help you, but NO! You'd rather sacrifice your own people than accept our help. You have terrorized and antagonized my people for far too long, Cowan, and it stops NOW!" Caldwell had him pinned back against the wall of his cell.

"Colonel Devane was unhurt..." he winced.

"I'm well aware of what you did to Colonel Devane - EVERYTHING you've ever done to her - and to all of my people. Taking her... That was just the last straw, Cowan. Somewhere in that twisted, demented little mind of yours you had to know that one day you would push us too far. You had to know that eventually we would strike back - and not in some petty fashion like your strike-forces - but with the full force of our military - to crush you, once and for all."

"So you intend to turn me over to the rebels?"

"Oh yeah... Unless you piss me off; then I'll probably just kill you myself," Caldwell smiled malevolently.

Looking into Caldwell's steely eyes, Cowan finally understood the folly of his actions. He knew he had provoked a war he could not hope to win. More than that, he knew without a doubt, that his life was now forfeit. Caldwell saw all of this in his eyes as he stared down at him. He smiled again, then turned and walked away without looking back. Cowan felt his heart sink as the doors slid closed behind him.

"Do we have an ID on the woman yet?" Caldwell asked, making his way to a cell down the hall from Cowan.

"No sir, and she's not talking."

"Then let's let her stew for a while. She'll talk soon enough."

When Logan finally opened her eyes, Beckett's face was the first thing she saw. He smiled warmly down at her, brushing a stray hair off of her forehead.

"Hello luv," he smiled.

"Heoow," she croaked, still unable to move.

There was no mistaking the fire in her eyes though. He knew as well as Sheppard how much she hated getting hit by one of those stunners.

"You're home now, luv, and perfectly safe. It looks like you took one, full-force this time, (her eyes flashed angrily) so it's likely to be a while before it wears off. If you'd like, I can put you under till the worst of it is over..."

She couldn't move her head left or right, nor could she speak coherently. "Ahnn?" she managed.

"What's that darlin?"

"Ahnn?"

"John? He's fine, luv, really, and so is Cameron. Riateh is with the children and they're all fine. From what I hear, the battle's all but over now, so they should be home soon, so don't worry your pretty little head over anything."

She blinked her understanding.

"Good girl. Now then... I know how hard it is for you to have to lay there and not be able to move or speak, so do you want me to go ahead and put you out for a bit?"

Her eyes softened a bit. She was deeply grateful for Beckett's consideration. As much as she hated being helpless, she had to admit that it would be easier to just go to sleep for a while, rather than lying there waiting for the effects of the stunner to dissipate. She blinked again and saw that he understood what she wanted.

Beckett pulled out a syringe and injected the sedative into the IV line they'd set up for her to keep her from getting dehydrated. Within moments, her eyelids began to flutter and then close. Her breathing became deeper and more rhythmic. Beckett stayed by her side to make sure she was completely under and her vital signs were stable.

He looked around the infirmary, which held not one single patient from the battle on the Genii homeworld. He'd expected there to be several, if not many, wounded soldiers, but as of yet, Logan had been the only one brought in. He wasn't at all disappointed, but he was surprised. Apparently, the Genii were not the formidable enemy they had always pretended to be. He looked up and smiled when General O'Neill came in to check on Logan.

"How is she?"

"She's fine, General."

"Why is she still out?"

"Actually, I did that..."

"Beg pardon?" O'Neill looked at him in surprise.

"She woke up a bit ago, but she still couldn't move or speak... I convinced her to sleep off the effects of the stunner, rather than to just lie there, aware and unable to move."

"Ah! Good thinking. I bet she was pissed though," he grinned.

"Aye! She always is when she gets hit with one of those things."

"Can't say I blame her, Doc," O'Neill grimaced.

"Nor I. It's not the most pleasant feeling in the world."

"Never had the pleasure myself, and I sure don't plan to!" O'Neill said.

"Smart lad. Any word from the planet, General?"

"Just spoke with General Caldwell, as a matter of fact. He says it's all over now, but for the tears," he grinned.

"Good to know. And Colonels Sheppard and Mitchell?"

"They'll be back soon."

LATER - ATLANTIS

"Who?" Weir asked.

"Sora... She was supposedly being held prisoner in the same place they were holding me." Logan explained.

"Supposedly?"

"Turns out she was a plant. She turned on me the minute we hit open ground. My fault, I guess for trusting her... I should have known, even after her spending so much time here before..."

"I would have expected Sora to join the rebels, not go back to Cowan's side," Weir said.

"Yeah well..." Logan shrugged. "Guess she was re-indoctrinated or something."

"That's too bad... I really thought there was hope for her..." Weir was cut off by a sudden radio transmission.

"Dr. Weir, General O'Neill, this is the Daedalus. We're ready to transport the prisoners."

"Sweet!" Logan grinned over at Weir.

"Thank you. Beam them directly to the brig."

"Understood, ma'am. Daedalus out."

"Let me guess, you'd like to be one of the first to greet our new guests?" Weir winked.

"Yes please?" Logan chirped.

"Alright Carson?" they looked at the good doctor.

"Don't think I could stop her if I tried," he chuckled, shaking his head.

"Come on," Weir said.

Logan hopped off the gurney and followed Weir out of the infirmary. She was in much higher spirits when she walked into the brig and saw Cowan looking around the room in confusion. Sora was in the cell next to his, a grim look on her face.

"Chief Cowan, I presume?" Weir asked.

"Who are you? What place is this?" he asked angrily.

"Cowan, I'm sure you've heard of Dr. Elizabeth Weir," Logan said breezily.

"Ah, of course." he muttered.

"And who is this?" Weir asked curiously, looking at the occupant in the next cell.

"Sora," Logan looked at her oddly.

"Sora?!" she shook her head, confused.

"Not Sora?" Logan gritted her teeth.

"Not the one we knew," Weir replied.

"You took Sora's place?" Logan asked the woman.

"I have nothing to say," she replied haughtily.

"Tell me she's not another Kolya!" Logan shook her head and looked at Cowan.

"No... You effectively managed to wipe out every last one of them," he sneered hatefully.

"I'd take comfort in that if I could believe anything that came out of your mouth," Logan hissed.

"So what was the plan, Cowan? This woman was supposed to follow Logan home, but we foiled that plan by attacking your planet?"

"Not exactly," he muttered.

"I don't think I was supposed to get out at all. She was probably supposed to try and get as much intel out of me as she could before..."

"I told you, those guards were never supposed to touch you!" Cowan shouted.

"Touch you... What did they?" Weir asked, horrified.

"Just a couple of guys in DESPERATE need of some shore leave, Elizabeth. I took them out before they could do anything..."

"Well... They better hope they don't cross paths with Colonel Sheppard any time soon," Weir winced.

"Colonel Sheppard need not be concerned about his mate... She handled them quite effectively," Cowan said, grudging admiration in his tone.

GENII

At that moment, Sheppard was standing in the cell that had housed Logan for a time, and next to him stood the real Sora. Sheppard had found her, shackled and gagged in a cell down the hall and around the corner from this one. He was looking down at two still unconscious Genii soldiers, lying in a heap on the floor against the far wall of the cell.

"Any idea what happened to these two?" he asked her.

"From what I could hear, it was your mate who did this?"

"Logan?"

"They tried to..."

Sheppard's face grew dark and his eyes flashed angrily as she trailed off, knowing what it was she didn't want to say. "Tried to... what?" he prodded.

"To... violate... her."

"And she did this?" he asked.

"I only know what I heard. Yelling, a woman screaming and then the two of them crying out right before a loud thud. I could hear her telling Turfa that she'd taken them out... I don't know how."

Sheppard was torn between fury at the two unconscious men, and admiration for his wife and her ability to get out of a bad situation.

"Lorne!" he called out down the hall.

"Sir?"

"It's against everything I'm feeling right now, but get some medics in here to evac these two and see to... whatever wounds they might have."

"Yes sir," Lorne replied and set off back down the hall again.

Sheppard fought off the urge to simply shoot them and be done with it. With one last, disgusted look at them, he led Sora out of the cell and back to the surface. He should have been home by now, he thought. He knew Logan was alright, but he was aching to just hold her in his arms. With the exception of Logan, there had been no injuries or casualties reported for their side during the entire coup. Pretty amazing, given the Genii penchant for wanting to remain in control. All they were doing now was making sure the planet was secure and completely under their control. He knew his duty, though, and he would remain there for as long as Caldwell and O'Neill ordered him to be there.


	78. Chapter 78

Sheppard wearily entered his quarters to find Logan sitting on the floor, playing with the twins. He was exhausted, but her smile was like a shot of adrenaline.

"Hey Big Daddy," she murmured.

"Hey yourself," he grinned boyishly.

The twins squealed at the sound of his voice and immediately started crawling toward him. He sank to his knees and held out his arms to them. Logan watched them, smiling happily at the sight of the three of them cuddling. They loved him every bit as much as they did Mitchell. She counted her blessings that they'd been able to put their family back together, mainly because Sheppard and Mitchell were the single most amazing men she'd ever known and THEY had managed to put the needs of their children above their own needs.

"Daddy!" Chelsea's excited squeal startled her.

"Daddy?!" Nic shouted from the other room following his sister's cry.

"Brace!" Logan warned him as two small bodies shot into the room.

Sheppard secured the twins in one arm and held out the other arm to Chelsea and Nic as they barrelled into him. Logan turned to look for the missing Tommy and saw him standing in the hall doorway, looking very forlorn.

"Tommy? Sweetie, aren't you going to come say hi to Daddy?"

"Hi," he croaked.

"Tommy's hot," Chelsea announced.

"Yeah?" Logan was instantly on her feet, making her way over to the boy. "He was fine a little while ago," she said, feeling his forehead.

"Cold," he croaked.

"Yikes! Not really buddy," Logan grimaced, picking him up in her arms and holding him close against her.

"Is he hot?" Sheppard asked, untangling himself from the other kids.

"Yeah... That was sudden," Logan murmured.

Sheppard got to his feet and came over to feel Tommy's forehead.

"Wow Buddy, I bet we could pop some popcorn on that noggin of yours," he teased.

"No want popcorn," he pouted.

"Well then, how about we get you into bed then?" Logan asked.

Tommy nodded and laid his head down on her shoulder as she carried him to his bedroom.

"You want me to get the doc?" Sheppard asked.

"Maybe you should... Just to check him over?" Logan replied.

She was still wearing her headset, so she heard Sheppard make the call to Beckett while she stripped off Tommy's clothes and got him into a fresh pair of pajamas. Sheppard came in and helped him climb under the covers while Logan went to get the thermometer.

"101..." she read out loud.

"Any of the other kids been sick?" Sheppard asked.

"No. And he was fine half an hour ago," she replied.

"Probably just a bug," Sheppard shrugged, trying not to appear too worried in front of the children.

"Tommy okay?" Nic asked.

"He'll be fine, buddy. But I'm thinking you ought to bunk with Chels tonight, okay?"

A knock at the door signaled Beckett's arrival and Sheppard quickly went to let him in.

"Hello Sheppard clan!" he greeted.

"Hi!" the kids chimed together, while the twins babbled in their own language.

"A regular choir you got here Colonels," he teased.

"Don't I know it!" Sheppard replied.

Logan and Sheppard stood back and let Beckett examine Tommy, Logan answering his questions about the boy's earlier demeanor and energy. He didn't seem at all worried, but insisted on taking a blood sample, just to be thorough. Tommy was brave through that and barely even flinched when Beckett gently stuck the needle in him.

"I'm sure it's just a bug, but I'll let you know what the blood tests say. In the meantime, you both know what to do; lots of love, fluids and the like. You might want to try and keep the other children away from him for tonight, though if they were all playing together before..."

"They were," Logan nodded.

"Then they might all get it too, are you ready for that?"

"No," They replied in unison.

"Well, you'd best GET ready, just in case. I'll call you as soon as I get the results back."

"Thanks Carson," Logan kissed him on the cheek.

"Ah luv... THAT is what makes a house-call worth it!"

After he left, Sheppard sent Nic and Chelsea to wash up while he entertained the twins for a while. Logan stayed with Tommy until she was sure he'd fallen asleep. Then she and Sheppard bathed the twins and got them ready for bed.

"Where's Cam?" she finally asked, curious that he'd come home but not Mitchell.

"He'll be back soon. He may stop off and see Riateh first, though."

She smiled knowingly. "As he should!"

A naked Nic streaked past them in a blur, followed by an exasperated Chelsea, looking very serious and quite fed-up. "I tried," she scowled and stalked past them into her room.

"You handle this one," Logan grinned, shaking her head.

"I got it," he smiled and kissed her on the top of the head.

"Maybe some time tonight we'll actually have the chance for a proper welcome home..." she trailed off meaningfully.

Sheppard never received his "proper welcome home" that night, as one-by one, all the kids came down with the same illness that had befallen Tommy. He and Logan were kept busy tending to all of them throughout the night.

Early the following morning, Beckett was again summoned to the Sheppard suite to examine all of the children. He assured the anxious parents that all of the children had the same relatively mild bug and would recover quickly. He did warn them, however, that they too would likely contract the same bug, from being in such close proximity to the children. He gave them each a course of anti-virals, in the hopes of staving off the inevitable, but he didn't give them much hope of avoiding the same fate as the children.

Beckett left their suite shaking his head. He certainly didn't begrudge them having to go through that bout of illness themselves, while all five children were ill at the same time. He couldn't even recommend having someone come in to help them out, since they too might contract the bug from being around them. He'd already turned Mitchell away, right before he left the family. Insisting that he wouldn't be any help at all if he fell sick too. Mitchell was only convinced to leave after Beckett told him that he would likely reinfect the children when he came down sick, thereby starting the whole cycle all over again.

He felt badly for Mitchell, who was desperately missing the children after having been gone for so long on the Genii campaign. The last thing he wanted to do was deny him access to his own kids, but he felt it would be best, in the long run, if he didn't have any contact with them until the bug had run its course through the family. At least he had Riateh to keep him occupied while he was separated from them.

For the next twenty four hours, Sheppard and Logan kept a close eye on one another, for any sign that one of them might be coming down with the bug and, for a while, they thought they just might have dodged the bullet when Sheppard began to exhibit the first signs of illness. The fever struck him as suddenly as it had the children and then he was down for the count.

Before he had fallen ill, she and Sheppard had pulled one of the cribs into their bedroom and placed both twins into it. Nic, Chelsea and Tommy were now sleeping beside Sheppard in their bed as well. That made it easier for Logan to tend to all of them at once, since she was now virtually on her own. She dreaded the thought of falling ill herself, and not being able to take care of them, and soon began toying with the idea of trying to heal them. She remembered that Riateh had mentioned something before about not squandering the gift on ordinary illnesses, but... Maybe, if she just focused on keeping herself well so she could care for them...?

Logan's head popped up as her headset crackled to life in her ear. She'd been sitting at the table folding laundry when she gave in to her fatigue. Intending only to rest her eyes for a few moments, she laid her head down on the table and instantly fell asleep.

"Logan? Sweetie, you there?"

Logan looked around, unsure at first where the voice was coming from.

"Logan?!"

"Huh? Cam?" she yawned.

"Yeah, sorry, did I wake you?" he asked.

"Oh...uh...yeah, but that's okay...What's wrong?"

"Nothing, just checking on you guys, everyone okay?"

"Yeah...we're...Well..."

"Logan, sweetie...Are YOU okay?" he asked, concerned.

"Sure...I don't have it...yet..."

"So you're taking care of EVERYONE, right? By yourself?"

"Well, yeah...Cam, we talked about this."

"You need help, Lo."

"I need for you to stay healthy, Cam."

"I'll be fine."

"No...Really Cam...Everything is under control..." she yawned.

Cadence chose that moment to break out in angry tears. Logan vaulted from her seat and charged into the bedroom to scoop her up before she disturbed the others.

"Is that Cadence?" Mitchell asked.

"Yeah...Cam, I need to..."

Scott suddenly chimed in, along with his sister, prompting Logan to go back to the bedroom and retrieve him as well.

"Scotty, too?"

"I'm afraid so," she sighed deeply.

"I'm coming over!"

"You can't!"

"Logan, you can't take care of all of them alone! What happens when YOU get sick?"

"I...won't!"

"I'm coming so don't argue!"

She heard the radio click off, but she didn't have time to worry about it right now. She had two screaming babies to deal with. She hurriedly changed diapers and sleepers, then sat in the rocker and tried to calm them down. Tears slipped down her own cheeks as she rocked and cooed to the miserable pair. Right now, she didn't really care that it might be better for the twins to ride out their illness, and strengthen their immune system function. That was one of the reasons Riateh had given her for not utilizing her healing abilities on minor illnesses or boo-boos. It was tearing her apart that they were so miserable.

Cameron was right: She did need help. She couldn't allow him to come into their suite and risk getting infected, but she knew trying to stop him would be like trying to stop a force of nature. She could, however, make it possible for him to take the twins with him.

"What do you say sweeties?" she murmured. "Should Mommy try and make you better so you can go with Daddy?"

They didn't even grunt, but continued resting motionlessly cradled against her. Before she could talk herself out of it, she closed her eyes and focused on the twins breathing. She concentrated on removing the congestion and easing their aching muscles. As the sound of their breathing became clearer and less labored, she concentrated on reducing their fevers. For good measure, she tried to picture removing the virus *bug* from their little bodies, rendering them whole and healthy in the process.

A moment later, she heard Mitchell pounding on the door. Her eyes popped open and she suddenly felt a wave of fatigue wash over her. She'd forgotten how much it took out of her to heal someone. Nevertheless, she rose from the rocking chair and made her way over to the door.

"Logan, open the door!" Mitchell ordered.

He was surprised when she did so without a fight. "Hey...Hi..." he stammered.

The twins looked up at him from her arms and stretched their arms out to him, babbling happily.

"Well...That's quite a turnaround..." he hugged them close to him.

"Don't scold me, but..."

"Scold you...Logan..." he paused as it hit him. "You healed them!" he said.

"Yeah..."

"Logan!"

"I couldn't let you take them if I didn't and you were...right...I needed help."

He knew how hard that had to be for her to admit. "Okay."

"You have clothes and diapers, right?" she asked wearily.

"Yeah."

"I can't let you in..."

"You're not going to try and heal everyone else, are you?" he asked.

"No...I just...It helps a lot that you're taking the twins."

"Will you be able to sleep now?"

"Very likely," she yawned.

"Why don't you let me come in and take over for a while?"

"No Cam...Really, it's okay. Take the twins to see Beckett and make sure they're okay. That will help me more than anything else right now."

"Alright sweetie...You know I hate leaving you like this..."

"I'll be fine..."

He stepped forward and kissed her lightly on the head.

"Call me if you need ANYTHING?" he pleaded.

"I promise."

"And get some sleep!" he ordered.

"I will..."

She closed the door behind him and weaved her way unsteadily over to the sofa. She flopped down on it and was asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Logan awoke to the sound of someone vomiting...violently, from the sound of it. Sheppard! She launched herself off the sofa and ran to the bedroom. It was a good thing she had placed a few basins in there, just in case one of them couldn't make it to the bathroom. Sheppard was sitting on the edge of the bed with his face practically inside the basin as his body heaved.

Logan went into the bathroom and wet a couple of washcloths; one for his forehead and the other to clean him up. Fortunately his aim was true, so she had only to mop up his face. He was burning up though, so as soon as she wiped his face and mouth, she removed his t-shirt and pj bottoms before pushing him back onto the bed. He shivered, from the fever as he looked up at her apologetically.

"Sssorry..." he shivered.

"It's okay baby..." she murmured, placing the cold, wet cloth on his forehead. "Shhhhh," she cooed.

"Kids?" he croaked.

She looked over at the three of them. None of them had woken up. She took the basin to the bathroom and dumped the contents into the toilet.

"They're fine," she assured him, and waited for him to drift back to sleep.

But she soon found out that they weren't really fine. All three of them had fevers spiking again. Logan buried her face in her hands and began to cry. She couldn't allow this to continue. Why should she allow her family to suffer when she had the power to stop it? Her mind made up, she wiped her tears and went over to the bed. Chelsea was closest, so she started with her. Placing one hand on her forehead and another on her abdomen, Logan concentrated on drawing the offending bug, or virus, from her childs' body. She immediately felt Chelsea respond as her breathing became easier and the heat cooled. Before moving on to Tommy, she willed Chelsea to continue sleeping, in order to regain full health. Then she took a deep breath and did the same to Tommy and then Nic.

All three children were sleeping peacefully when she stood up to come around to Sheppards' side of the bed. Her limbs felt like stone, and she felt incredibly weak. But she wasn't about to let Sheppard suffer any longer. Sitting by his side, she willed her own fatigue away as she reached out to place her hands on Sheppard. Repeating the same procedure she had used on the children, she exerted her control and drew the illness from his body. She didn't have the strength to make him sleep, though, so he immediately came to and looked up at her. She smiled down at him.

"Better?" she asked.

"Yeah...What the hell...?"

Logan slumped forward, unconscious, across his lap.

"Logan!" he cried, turning her over and cradling her on his lap.

It took him a moment to realize what she had done. He was...fine. The fever and body aches were completely gone. She'd done what Beckett advised her not to. If he'd been coherent, he would have known that she'd do it; that she couldn't stand to see her family suffer. He reached over and checked each of the children. Sure enough, they too had no more fever.

"Logan, sweetie, wake up for me," he pleaded.

She was completely limp in his arms. Easing out from under her, so he could get to his feet, Sheppard then scooped her up into his arms and carried her to Chelsea's bedroom. He laid her on the bed and tried to rouse her again, without success. Worse still, her skin was starting to feel increasingly warm.

"Dammit!" he muttered under his breath and ran to find a headset.

"Sheppard to Beckett!" he cried into the mike.

"Beckett come in!" he pleaded.

A moment later, he heard the raspy voice of Beckett. "I'm here John, what's wrong?"

"It's Logan...Can you get here NOW?!"

"On my way," he assured him.

Beckett shook the sleep from his body and hurriedly dressed. He didn't even have to ask. Logan had pushed it by healing the twins already. He understood why she'd done it, and he had to admit, he'd agreed with her decision to heal the twins. She needed help and it was the only way to make sure the virus didn't spread to Mitchell and Riateh, only to circle back to the Sheppard family again. He hadn't thought she'd be able to heal the others after that, or that she'd even try, though he supposed he should have, given who Logan was.

He arrived within minutes to find Sheppard frantically trying to rouse the unconscious Logan. He shooed Sheppard out of his way and began examining her. She was now spiking a fever of 102 degrees, no, make that 103 degrees now. Her body had become so depleted by healing the others that she'd been incapable of fighting off the bug herself; something he suspected she'd been doing all along in order to care for her family.

"The children?" he asked.

Sheppard motioned to the other room. "She healed all of them... They're sleeping..."

"We've got to get her to the infirmary, John," Beckett said, his tone serious.

"She's...She's gonna be okay...Doc...Tell me she's gonna be okay!"

"I don't know lad... I don't know what she's done to herself by healing all of you... I'll do everything I can..."

A med team suddenly appeared, Beckett having called them before he left his quarters. Sheppard gingerly placed Logan on the gurney and covered her with a blanket.

"I've already called Riateh to come stay with the children, you can follow us to the infirmary as soon as she gets here."

Sheppard forced himself to stay put as he watched them wheel his wife out the door. "Dammit Logan..." he muttered, then went to check on the kids. "Where the hell are the twins?!" he gasped.

He thought maybe she had put them back in their own room, but the crib was empty and he couldn't find them anywhere. Just as he was about to call Mitchell, Riateh showed up. She could see that he was frantic, from more than just his concern for Logan.

"The twins! I can't find them!"

"John, John, it's okay! They're with Cameron, they're fine."

He froze and looked at her in terror until her words finally sank in. "With Cam..."

"Yes... He insisted on helping you, so she healed the twins and let him take them back to our quarters. I promise you, they are fine."

"Oh... good... Okay... I... The kids are sleeping, I think Logan... made them...somehow..."

"She healed all of you, didn't she?"

"Yeah... I gotta..." he trailed off, heading for the door. "I'll call you..."

"Don't worry. The children will be fine. Go see to Logan."

Sheppard nodded, thanked her and sprinted to the infirmary.

"I don't know what to tell you, John," Beckett sadly shook his head.

"The human body can only take so much, John Sheppard. Even with her abilities and her strength..."

Sheppard listened as Lyset explained why she couldn't use her own healing ability to help Logan. What he and the children had might have been a relatively benign and simple virus, it had still taken a lot of energy to heal the six of them - and Logan was only one person. The ratio was way off there.

He fought the fear and guilt he was feeling, so he could concentrate on being there for Logan. He couldn't even question why she had done it; he already knew. He knew she could never stand by and watch her family suffer. She had to act, even if it meant putting herself in danger. She would always put her family first.

"She's a fighter, John, you know that. She won't give up. She'll fight her way out of this coma and come back to us," Caldwell said.

"She would... but if what they say is true... She doesn't have the strength to fight..."

Caldwell could see the agony in his eyes. The two of them had endured so much over the years and it seemed like they could never catch a break. For his own part, he adored Logan. He cherished her and would do anything to protect her and keep her happy. For her, happiness meant life with Sheppard and her children. He would not even entertain the notion that she might not recover. She HAD to.

"We have to believe, John. You know she has more strength than ten women..."

Sheppard nodded. "She does..."

"Then trust that she'll come back to you, to all of us. We need her, and she knows that."

Sheppard nodded again. Caldwell was right. Logan wouldn't leave them. Not if she could help it.

"The General's right, John. It may even be that this comatose state could help her regain the strength she needs. No one is giving up on her."

"Damn right we're not," Sheppard said.

"Talk to her lad. Let her know how much we all need her," Beckett said.

He nodded and took a seat by her bedside. Taking her hand in both of his, he began whispering words of love and encouragement only she could hear... IF she could hear.

Mitchell had come by earlier, to see how she was doing, but he didn't stay long. He knew Logan would appreciate it more if he took care of the children while she was.. .ill... Sheppard, too. He and Riateh were alternating with Mike and Janet in caring for the kids until Logan and Sheppard were able to do so on their own. Like Caldwell and Sheppard, Mitchell refused to consider the possibility that Logan would not recover. He let Sheppard know that the kids were fine and told him not to worry, as they would be well-cared for around the clock. Sheppard thanked him, then went back to talking to Logan.

Logan fought her way through the hazy, grey fog that surrounded her. She could hear voices around her, but she couldn't make out what they were saying. They were at once familiar to her and strange. The only thing she knew for sure was that Sheppard's comforting presence surrounded her. She could feel his love wrap around her like a blanket, making her feel warm and safe.

"Hello?" she called out.

She continued walking and gradually the fog surrounding her began to fade. As she finally cleared the fog, she stepped into a pool of brilliant, almost blinding, white light.

"Uh-oh..." she murmured to herself.

"Greetings, Logan Sheppard," a male voice called out from behind her.

She froze and then slowly turned toward the voice. "Hello."

"You look lost," he smiled warmly.

"Lost? Me? No..." she stammered nervously.

"You needn't be afraid, child."

"Afraid? No... Not afraid... Just... Hey... Walking around in a fog and then suddenly stepping out into a really bright... place... You calling me 'child'...This can't be good."

"No?"

"Where I come from, that usually means... you know..." she was unable to say the word "dead".

"I suppose that would depend on ones interpretation of... you know..." he winked, teasing her mercilessly.

"Well at least you have a sense of humor. Um...Can I ask you something?"

"Of course, child."

She cringed at the term "child". "Where am I? Exactly?"

"You are..." he paused, looking for the right word. "Between..."

She stared at him uncomprehendingly. "Between... what? A rock and a hard place, frying pan and a fire, what?"

"You are in a place that is what you might consider to be... life and death..."

She cringed again. "I had a feeling you might say that."

"Do you fully understand what that means?" he asked.

"Well, I'm not dead, so..." she paused and looked up at him. "I'm NOT... right?"

"No, but you are very... near..."

"Oh... Well then..." she trailed off, not sure of what to say next.

"You are between the planes..."

Logan snorted, trying to ease her tension with humor. "If this is an airport, it's the quietest I've ever been to..." she quipped.

"Planes of existence, child," he bit back an amused grin.

"Right... I knew that. So, does that mean you're an Ancient... Excuse me, Ascended being?"

"I am."

Logan felt something heavy in the pit of her stomach. "Oh."

"We are not all as those you may have encountered before."

"Good to know... And you're here with me... why?"

"You were lost."

"Uh-huh... That can be said of a lot of humans, I suppose. But I thought you had a strict no-fraternization policy regarding lower beings."

"This is true. As a rule, we do not interfere in the lives of those on the lower planes."

"I'm aware... So why show yourself to ME?" she asked.

"You called to us, dear."

She stared at him open-mouthed for a moment. "I what?"

"You are of our bloodline, child. You are on the verge of..."

She held up a hand to stop him. "DON'T say it!" she hissed.

"I am aware of your feelings regarding the Ascended, Logan, but I assure you, one day, you will understand the reasons why we..."

"Turned your collective backs on the human race?" she finished for him.

"Yes."

"At least you didn't deny it. Okay... So I called you, right? To do WHAT?"

"For help... Guidance... As I said, you were lost."

"So, you'll help me to what?"

"To understand the choices you now have to make."

"Choices? What choices?"

"You are between planes, Logan."

"So you said...And?"

"There are three journeys you can take."

"Three?"

"Three. You may choose to continue on the path to enlightenment, by ascending to a higher plane..." he paused at the sour look on her face. "You may choose not to, and end your existence altogether," the sour look remained on her face.

"Or?" she demanded.

"You may try to return to the plane of existence you came from."

"I take door number three!" she said without hesitation.

"There is something you should know first, Logan."

"And that is?"

"Trying does not guarantee success."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He smiled kindly down at her and took her hand in his. "As I told you earlier, you, or rather your body, is very near spent, which is why you are able to be here with me right now. You have weakened your body greatly, by sacrificing your... life force... to heal your family."

She gasped. "I couldn't just let them... suffer... I love them so much..."

"There is no disputing that, Logan, but you were told that there were limits to what a human body could do. The energy, or life force, required to perform healing on another... it is... significant. I must confess that I was surprised you were able to heal all of them."

"I've always been accused of being an over-achiever..." she said dryly.

"Indeed. That is a trait you share with your mate."

She smiled at the mention of John, then grew serious again. "I can't leave him... and the children..."

"You may not have a choice... soon. Your body grows weaker as we speak."

"Then send me back now!" she cried.

"I cannot."

"What? You said you would help..."

"Going back... YOU must do this, no one else can do it for you."

"How?"

"The answers are within you, child."

Logan looked up into the kind green eyes of the human form Ascended being and thought she recognized something familiar.

"Do I... know you?" she asked, suddenly quite sure that she did.

"Indeed. Or rather you know _of_ me."

"Who...?"

"I am your great-great-great grandfather, Logan."

Her jaw dropped. "Oh... I was told that I descended from a long line of..."

"Ancients?"

She nodded.

"It is so."

"I want to go home, Gramps."

"Search your mind, Logan...What you seek is all there..."


	79. Chapter 79

TWO DAYS LATER

Hope kept a close eye on Nic and Chelsea during school hours. Nic seemed to be okay, aside from missing his parents, but Chelsea seemed deeply troubled. Hope knew why, as she'd heard her parents discussing Colonel Devane's condition, but she also knew that Chelsea didn't know the full extent of her mother's illness. She and Sam had always made a special effort to look after the younger kids and today was no exception. David, Chelsea and Riley were all sitting at a table by themselves, looking subdued and worried, while Nic was keeping himself occupied by building things with Lincoln Logs. It looked to Hope like Chelsea had chosen to share her fears with her two closest friends, who now seemed as frightened as she.

She whispered to Sam that they should try and distract the three at the table to keep them from dwelling on their fears. Logan Devane was well-known and loved by all the Atlantis children and if anything happened to her, it would leave a great void in their lives. She comforted herself with the knowledge that the Colonel had had several brushes with death before and survived, sometimes against incredible odds; there was no reason why this time it should be any different.

She and Sam made their way over to the three children and engaged them in conversation. Hope offered to read them a story from one of her favorite books, in the "The Chronicles of Narnia" series. They agreed readily enough, but there were several times throughout the story that Hope caught Chelsea staring out the window, sadness in her eyes, and she would have to find a way to bring her back into the story, usually by asking her questions about the characters in the book.

Riateh watched from the doorway, clearly impressed with Hope's efforts to distract the children. It had taken her some time to learn to trust the young Wraith girl, who continued to look less and less like a wraith with each passing day. She wasn't sure if that was because she had begun to see her as a child, rather than a wraith, or if Hope really was losing her wraith characteristics as she grew. In any case, it was clear that she adored the other children and that she was very protective of them.

As much as she hoped that the girl could distract Chelsea, she could see that she was fighting a losing battle. Borrowing a headset from one of the teachers, Riateh placed a call to Mitchell and asked him to come to the school wing, assuring him that it was not an emergency, but that he was needed. He got Rylin to stay with Tommy and the twins and hurried down to the school wing to join her.

"What's wrong?" he asked, deeply concerned.

"The bond you share with Chelsea is very special."

"Yes, it is. Why?" he blinked at her curiously.

"I dared not pull John away from Logan's side, but..." she pointed across the room at Chelsea.

Even from here, he could see the furrowed brow and fear in her eyes. "Ah, baby girl..." he moaned. "She's so sad..." It tore at his gut to see her that way. She hid it well at home, but she couldn't hide it all the time.

"She needs you, Cameron. Nic seems to be dealing alright, but..."

"Chelsea knows," he finished for her.

"Or suspects, at least. I do not believe she heard us talking, but I am fairly certain that she can sense what's happening."

"If I go in there, it'll scare her half to death, thinking I'm coming to deliver bad news. It'll scare the other kids, too."

"I will get her and bring her to you."

Mitchell nodded and kissed her lightly on the lips to thank her. Riateh squeezed his hand and smiled lovingly up at him before going in to the classroom.

"Excuse me, Hope. May I borrow..." she paused, pretending to scan the table for a suitable volunteer. "...Chelsea, for a little bit? I need some help with something."

"Yes, Miss Riateh," Hope smiled.

"Thank you," She held out a hand. "Chelsea, do you mind?"

Chelsea shook her head and reached out to take Riateh's hand. She meekly followed Riateh out into the hall where she saw Mitchell. Her little heart caught in her throat and she was sure that he had come to tell her that her mother was gone.

"It's okay, baby, I promise, nothing has happened to Mommy, I swear."

"Then..."

"Why am I here? I just thought we could spend a little time together, you know, away from the crowd. We don't get to do that very much, just you and I."

Chelsea eyed him speculatively. "Mommy's okay?"

"Your Daddy would have told us if anything happened, or if she got worse."

"Okay."

"You wanna take a walk with me? We can go down to the pier."

"Okay," she nodded, slipping her tiny hand into his.

Mitchell and Chelsea spent an hour walking around the piers before Chelsea confronted him again. "Are you sure nothing happened to Mommy?" she asked.

"Come on sweet-pea... You know I'd never lie to you."

"Yeah...but..."

"I know you're worried, cadet, but your mommy is the strongest person I've known... EVER. She isn't going to give in without a fight. She's got too much to live for."

"I'm scared, Uncle Cam..." her iron-will broke and she dissolved into tears.

Mitchell sat down at the edge of the pier and pulled her down onto his lap, cuddling her close and stroking her dark, silken hair. "I know baby, it's okay...You just let it all out now... I'm here."

She cried until she couldn't cry anymore. Then she simply clung to him while he rocked her in his arms. Next to her parents, Mitchell was the one she felt most safe with. He'd always been there for her, and she knew he always would be, no matter what. She loved her other "uncles" like Mike, Daniel, Rodney and Caldwell, but she always felt a special connection to Mitchell.

"Uncle Cam?"

"Yeah sweet-pea?"

"Will you take me to see my mom?"

Mitchell pulled back to look her in the eye. She had calmed completely now, but she had the same determined look he had come to know, and sometimes dread, in Logan's eyes.

"Don't you think that might be more upsetting for you, Sweet-pea?"

She shook her head negatively. "I know she's... sleeping... I just want to SEE her."

He looked at her skeptically.

"I NEED to see her, Uncle Cam. It'll make me feel better." She looked deep into his eyes, her own wide and sad. "Please?"

He could never refuse her anything, especially when she looked at him like that. He didn't think Sheppard and Logan would want her seeing Logan like that, but the child was determined. He knew, from experience, where that determination came from, and that there was no point in fighting it. She was the very image of Sheppard, but she had inherited much of her spunk and spirit from Logan, not to mention her stubborn streak.

"Tell you what... Let me talk to Daddy and Dr. Beckett to see what they say. Fair enough?"

"I guess..." her face fell.

"Come on, sweet-pea, give me a break here, okay? I promise, I'll do what I can to convince them."

"Convince who of what?"

They turned at the sound of Daniel's familiar voice.

"Uncle Daniel," Chelsea greeted him with a half-hearted smile.

"Well, sweet-pea, since when do I not get a hug?" he teased.

Chelsea reached out her arms to him and he picked her up easily, cradling her petite body against him, and hugging her fiercely.

"Daniel," Mitchell greeted.

"Cameron... What's up?"

"The cadet here is insisting on paying a visit to her mom," Mitchell informed him.

"Ah!" he pulled back to look at her face, recognizing the same signs as Mitchell had. "Yes, I recognize the look."

Chelsea grinned in spite of herself. She loved it when people compared her to her mom. Both parents, really, but she was more often compared to Sheppard because she looked so much like him. Every once in a while, though, she would do or say something that was pure Logan, and she loved getting called on it.

"It'll make me feel better."

"Are you sure about that?" he asked seriously.

She nodded vigorously. "I'm sure. And it'll make HER feel better, too... to have me there."

"So... What was Uncle Cameron promising to do?"

"To talk to Dr. Beckett and Daddy to make sure it's okay."

Daniel glanced over at Mitchell who winced. "Better you than me, brother!" he teased.

"You're supposed to be his wing-man, Uncle Daniel... If you BOTH ask, Daddy and Dr. Beckett are sure to say yes!" she chirped.

"Hear that?" Mitchell chuckled. "THAT was the sound of her steel-trap mind coming down on your... foot!"

"Yeah," Daniel grimaced. "I got that..."

Beckett quietly went about checking Logan's vital signs again, taking care not to wake an exhausted Sheppard, who had fallen asleep with his head on her bed and arm draped protectively across her abdomen. He sighed as he looked over the results, deeply concerned that she seemed to be weakening. He saw Mitchell waving to him from the window in the door and hurried out to the hall to speak with him.

"How is she?" Mitchell asked.

"Still in a coma..." he trailed off as he caught sight of Chelsea and Daniel standing at the end of the hall. "What is the child doing here?" he gasped.

"She wants to see her mother."

"Are you out your bloody mind?!" Beckett hissed.

"That's entirely likely, but not the point. She NEEDS to see her mom, Carson."

"What good would it do?"

"It might reassure her... I don't know... She said it would make her feel better, and she seems to think it'll make Logan feel better, too."

"I don't know..." Beckett shook his head.

"Let me go in and talk to John."

"I'd rather not wake him, if you don't mind. He finally fell asleep."

"Something you should consider, Carson... Chelsea isn't just her father's daughter, if you take my meaning."

Beckett rolled his eyes, clearly exasperated. "Yes, I get the point..." he looked through the window at Sheppard. "I really do hate to wake him, though. He was exhausted."

"How's this then... We just let her take a quick peek, for now, just through the window? We tell her we'll talk to her father about it when he wakes up?"

"Alright," Beckett finally relented. "Just a quick peek then, no arguments!" he warned.

"Thanks Doc!" Mitchell clapped him on the back and turned to motion to Chelsea.

She beamed up at Beckett as she came to stand beside Mitchell. "I can see Mommmy?"

"Listen to me darlin'" Beckett began. "Your Dad is sleeping right now, he was very tired, so all I'm going to let you do is take a quick peek through the window here, just to put your mind at ease. When your Dad wakes up, I promise you, we will talk to him about letting you spend a little time with your Mum, okay?"

She looked somewhat disappointed, but she knew well enough to be grateful for what she was given. "Yes sir," she murmured.

Mitchell picked her up in his arms and held her up to the window so she could see her parents inside. She appeared to be studying them intently and she didn't say a word.

"Okay honey?" Mitchell asked.

"So soon?" she asked.

"I promise, sweet-pea, we WILL come back..."

She reached out and patted his face. "I love you, Uncle Cam."

He melted into a puddle every time she told him that. "I love you, too, sweetheart," and planted a kiss on her forehead. "Shall we go get some ice-cream before I take you back to school?"

She nodded, throwing her arms around his neck. "Yes, Uncle Daniel, too, please!"

"You got it," he grinned and carried her back down the hall to where Daniel waited for them.

"Dr. Beckett?" the nurse called out.

"Shhhh, now. You'll wake the Colonel, dear," he lightly scolded.

"Dr. Beckett... The Colonel... He's not... asleep..."

"What are you talking about?" Beckett froze, suddenly very apprehensive.

"I was just checking on her and accidentally bumped him...hard... He didn't move, he didn't flinch..."

"He was VERY tired..." Beckett began.

"He's out cold, Doctor, I was concerned, so I checked him more carefully... He's totally unconscious!"

Beckett rushed over to check on Sheppard himself and discovered, to his horror, that he was indeed unconscious. Nothing he did would rouse him either.

"Oh my God! Get a gurney in here!" he called out.

THE PLACE BETWEEN

"What do you mean 'it's all there'?" Logan asked.

"Just as any of your other gifts were always there."

Logan stared at him, feeling her temper flare. "I don't understand."

"Logan!" cried a voice from very far away.

She turned and looked around. "John?" she called back.

"Logan!" It WAS John's voice she was hearing.

"John?! I'm here!" she called out. She looked over at her ancestor and smiled happily. "That's my...John..."

"Logan?"

As she turned, she saw him appear through the fog surrounding the circle of light.

"John!" she cried out and flung herself into his arms.

"Sparks...Baby..." he hugged her tightly against him. "I found you," he breathed into her ear.

"I... how?" she asked, looking up into his eyes, before turning to face her ancestor. "You?"

He shook his head somberly. "No child... I'm afraid this was all him," he replied, pointing at Sheppard.

"But, how...?" she asked.

"I dunno," Sheppard said. "I just... I couldn't reach you, and I wasn't about to let you go."

"John... I'm in some sort of... limbo...here apparently. Because my body's..." she gasped and looked sharply up at him. "John, I was... I AM sick, really sick, that's how I ended up here... What did you _do_?" she demanded.

"I just..."

"He's trying to take your place," her ancestor said.

"What?!" she cried. "No! John... ** _NO_**!"

"Look, I'm not sure WHAT I did, or how I really got here, but I found you," he grinned sheepishly.

"Is he... dying?" Logan asked.

The man nodded somberly.

"You have to go back!" she turned to the man again. "He CAN go back...right?"

"Of course,"

She turned back to Sheppard. "Go back! Right now!" she demanded.

"Not without you," he dug in his heels.

"You have to... before it's too late!"

"Not without **_you_**!" he shouted.

"I want to go home, too, but..."

"But what?"

"I don't know how!"

"What? Isn't it just something you can *think* into happening? Or can't he send us back together?" he paused and looked at the benign looking gentleman. "Who IS this guy anyway? He looks familiar, but..."

"Apparently this is my great-great-great grandfather..."

"Patrick Devane?" Sheppard finished for her.

"Very good, John," Patrick smiled.

"Yeah well, I saw it in the family bible... He kinda looks like your Dad, Sparks."

"Yeah, I noticed that... John, we're in a bit of a time crunch here."

"Right... So? Can you help us out here?" he asked, apparently non-plussed at running into one of her old relatives here, wherever HERE was.

"He's an Ascended one, babe, they DON'T help, remember?"

"I have explained to Logan that she has the power within herself to get back, if that is her choice."

"IF that's her choice? Logan would never choose to leave her family."

"So I understand. Nevertheless, she must get back without any interference or assistance from the Ascended."

"Why are you here then?" Sheppard asked, highly annoyed.

"I was lost," Logan deadpanned, rolling her eyes.

"Uh-huh... And?"

"I dunno..." Logan threw up her hands in frustration.

"Perhaps it was my own curiosity that got the better of me. Still, I have broken no rules, per se. I simply gave her a... nudge."

"A nudge?" Sheppard asked.

"He explained why I'm here and that I have... choices..."

"But he won't... like... point to the exit?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Nope."

"Nice!" Sheppard muttered. "Alright...let's see... We're two intelligent human beings, we can figure this thing out. We go home, and we go home TOGETHER."

ATLANTIS INFIRMARY

Beckett had placed a call to Riateh to come to the infirmary right away and then called for Janet as well. He was beginning to feel way in over his head in dealing with the situation. There was simply no medical reason for Sheppard to be unconscious.

"Doctor?"

He started, then turned to see Riateh and Mitchell come into the room.

"Good Lord, you don't have the wee one with you still?" he gasped.

"No, no... I was dropping her off in class when you called Riateh... What the hell is wrong with John?" Mitchell pointed to the bed now occupied by Sheppard.

"I wish I could tell you," Beckett shook his head. "I was hoping Riateh could help us out with that."

"I am not a doctor," she said uncertainly.

"I can't find anything medically wrong with him," Beckett informed them.

"Ri... Can you...tell...anything?" Mitchell asked.

"I will try," she nodded.

Placing a hand on Sheppard's forehead, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She didn't move for several minutes and Beckett was beginning to fear that she was falling victim to whatever happened to Sheppard. Suddenly, she took another deep breath and opened her eyes.

"Ri? Honey, what is it?" Mitchell asked.

"He is... not...here..." she murmured.

"What?!" Beckett and Mitchell said in unison.

"What do you mean? Not here?" Mitchell asked.

"He has gone after Logan."

"Gone after her? Luv, Logan is in a coma!" Beckett shook his head.

"I believe he tried to heal her himself, but he does not possess the power. I believe he has gone to... take her place..."

Chelsea knelt outside the door, struggling to hold back tears. She'd known something was wrong. She could feel it. As soon as she saw Riateh and Mitchell hurry out of the classroom, she had known she couldn't wait any longer. She went to her teacher and asked to be excused to go to the restroom, and then she'd bolted for the infirmary. Her parents had always taught her better than to lie and disobey the rules, but she also knew that they wouldn't listen to her when she told them that she could help.

She waited for the three of them to leave the room and walk down the hall before creeping quietly into the room. She stood between the beds her parents rested in for a moment, then pulled Sheppard's bed closer to Logan's. Taking their closest hands in hers, she clasped them together and held them fast in her fist. She wasn't really sure what she was doing, or how to do what she had to do, but she had to try. She closed her eyes and focused her mind on the combined image of her parents. When she had a clear image of their smiling faces locked in her mind, she called out to them with her mind.

THE PLACE BETWEEN

Lost in the grey fog once more, Logan and Sheppard held fast to one another's hands. They felt as though they were making progress, but they really had no idea where they were. They could barely make out the other's face, right in front of them, so they weren't sure how they were going to find their way home.

"Mommy? Daddy?"

They froze in place and turned to look at each other. It couldn't be.

"Mommy? Daddy?" came the call again.

The fog dissipated somewhat.

"That can't be...Chels?" Sheppard looked puzzled.

" ** _Mommy_**! _**Daddy**_!" her voice sounded more frantic now.

"Chelsea? Baby, is that you?" Logan called out.

"Mommy!"

"Chelsea? Where are you, sweet-pea?" Sheppard called out.

"Daddy!"

"Yeah..." he looked down at Logan questioningly.

The fog had dissipated even more now.

"Keep talking sweet-pea... We'll find you," Sheppard said.

"Okay Daddy," she replied.

Chelsea continued to chatter away, about nothing in particular while they stumbled through the fog, following the sound of her voice. After a few minutes, Logan gasped and stopped in her tracks.

"Mommy?"

"Logan?" Sheppard took her in his arms. "What's wrong?"

"I... think we must be getting close..."

"Why? What's wrong?"

"I don't...feel...so good..." she gasped, suddenly out of breath.

"I can help!" Chelsea cried out.

Logan felt a sudden surge of energy course through her body, but it did little to comfort her.

"No!" she cried out.

"What?"

"John... She's trying to...Oh my God!"

"What?" he asked frantically.

"John you have to go... stop her!"

"Stop her... What is she doing?" he asked, suddenly afraid.

"She's trying to heal me...John...It could kill her!"

"NO!" he cried. "Chelsea?" he called out, but she didn't answer.

Logan could feel herself, and Chelsea now, growing steadily weaker. "Johnny please... You have to stop her...Go!"

"I can't leave you here!" he argued.

"There's no time... I can find my way back now, but you have to go NOW and stop her..." she pleaded.

Sheppard looked at her dubiously. "Sparks..."

"She'll die..."

Sheppard's eyes were full of agony. He couldn't bear to lose either one of them.

"Please Johnny... You have to save our baby!"

ATLANTIS INFIRMARY

Mitchell and Beckett, followed by Janet, came back into the room to find Chelsea seated between the two beds holding her parents hands in hers. Mitchell immediately moved toward her to pick her up, but Riateh warned him away. She could sense what Chelsea was trying to do, and she was scared. Scared for Chelsea and her parents.

"What?"

"She is connected to them... You cannot break it, or..."

"Or what?" Mitchell gasped.

"They could all be lost," Riateh replied solemnly.

Although Logan knew it was only her consciousness here in this place, she still felt her limbs growing heavier, weaker and achy. She felt the fever that continued to rage in her body. She wasn't about to give up, but it was getting more and more difficult to "move."

"We can't just do nothing!" Mitchell groaned, longing to tear the child away.

Chelsea's skin was getting paler the longer she sat there holding onto her parents' hands. Suddenly they saw Sheppard's body twitch and his hand tightened on Chelsea's. She appeared to be fighting him at first but then Sheppard managed to break her hold on Logan. He gasped for air and his eyes popped open as he pulled Chelsea toward him.

"Daddy...Nooo!" she cried, reaching back for her mother.

Sheppard sat up unsteadily, and pulled her into his arms, cradling her against him. His eyes were still slightly unfocused but he had an iron grip on Chelsea.

"Shhhhh, sweet-pea..." he murmured soothingly.

"But Mommy...I have to..."

Sheppard turned her face to his and looked her in the eye. "No baby, Mommy said no."

Too weakened by her effort to save her parents, Chelsea began to cry softly and sagged against him as he held her close.

"Come on, Sparks...You promised..." he murmured, watching her still, pale form lying on the gurney.

"John? What the hell...?" Mitchell stepped forward.

"She's coming back... She promised me..." he said, gritting his teeth.

It had nearly killed him to leave her there, but he agreed that he had to stop Chelsea from sacrificing herself to bring them back. They all anxiously watched Logan for signs indicating she might emerge from her coma, but no one really understood what was happening.

"I don't understand... What happened to you, John?" Mitchell asked.

"I'm not sure I understand it myself..." he murmured. "I just know...I was THERE with her..."

"In her mind?" Beckett asked.

"Sort of... Not really... I can't explain it..." he stammered.

Logan continued to struggle through the ever-darkening haze. Her entire being ached and it was all she could do to keep "moving." The voices surrounding her were getting louder, but all that did was compound the pain in her head. Just as she felt her body about to give out, she summoned every last ounce of will and determination, closed her eyes and took a huge "leap." The astounded people surrounding her bed gasped in shock as Logan coughed and gasped for air. Her eyelids fluttered open.

"Logan?" Sheppard called out, getting to his feet, still cradling Chelsea in his arms.

He shuffled over to her bed and took her hand in his, gratified when she weakly squeezed his hand. She smiled faintly as his handsome face came into focus.

"Chels?" she croaked.

"Mommy," she murmured weakly.

"She's okay, Sparks..."

"Good," she croaked hoarsely.

Beckett and Janet shooed them aside and began examining Logan. She was incredibly weak, but at least she'd regained consciousness. Her fever was still high, at 102F, but she had fight and determination in her eyes. Janet spooned some ice-shavings into her mouth, to help ease the raw soreness in her dry throat. Sheppard handed Chelsea over to Mitchell, who cradled the suddenly very sleepy child against him, while he went and sat next to Logan's bed and took her hand in his.

"Thanks," she croaked.

"I love you, baby," he murmured softly in her ear.

"Love you," she whispered back.

"Doc?" Mitchell prodded.

"Well, she may not feel like it, but this is better than being in a coma..."

"What do you mean?" Sheppard asked.

"Well...She can FEEL all her symptoms now, which we can ease somewhat, but at least she can TELL us how she feels."

"You may come to regret that," Logan croaked.

"And look! She even has her sense of humor intact!" Janet teased.

Logan snorted, then winced in pain. Her eyelids were beginning to flutter sleepily. "Can I hold my baby please?" she asked.

They all looked to Beckett. "Just for a few moments, Luv, you still need to rest," he warned.

Mitchell stepped forward and gently laid Chelsea on the bed next to Logan. The child yawned and curled up against her mother's side. "Mommy," she breathed.

Logan kissed her forehead and wrapped her arm around Chelsea's slight frame. Within moments, Chelsea was fast asleep. Beckett ushered the others out into the hall and admonished them against tiring out Logan with too many visits. By the time he went back inside to check on them, Sheppard, Logan and Chelsea were all cuddled together, fast asleep on her bed. He quietly checked Logan's monitors then left them there to sleep.

ONE WEEK LATER

"How did you know how to find me?" Logan asked.

She was feeling much stronger now, barely a week after emerging from the coma. She was still in the infirmary, but Sheppard was lying on the bed next to her, stroking her soft, silky hair as they talked.

"I dunno," Sheppard replied, shaking his head. "I just... Remember when I told you about that mission where we all thought we'd gone back to earth? That first year we were here?"

"I remember. The illusory worlds created for you by the... mist?"

"Right... And how I was able to manipulate everything just by thinking about it?"

"Uh-huh..."

"I figured maybe I could just use the same principle to try to reach you."

"And it worked," she smiled.

"Apparently," he lightly brushed her lips with his own.

"John... You never did tell me..."

"What?"

"You could move these people around any way you wanted to..."

"Uh-huh...?"

"So... What did you have ME doing? We weren't a couple back then, but did you ever..." she blushed slightly.

Sheppard wasn't smiling, though. In fact he grimaced, as if in pain.

"John?"

"I...uh...Sorry..." he looked away for a moment.

"What's wrong?"

"I just... That was at a time when I thought you were dead."

"Yes...?"

"I couldn't... I mean, I figured things out pretty quickly, you know that I could make things happen, or people appear with just a thought, but..."

"You couldn't bear to see a fake me?" she guessed.

He cuddled her close to him and held her tightly in his arms. "You're the first person that came to mind, but I...fought it... It hurt too much..."

"I'd feel the same way, John, if the situations were reversed."

"I know... I just..."

"It's okay, Johnny..." she murmured, pressing her lips against the pulse beating in his neck.

"You are the one person I wanted to see... to TOUCH, and I couldn't bring myself to...GO there..." he paused.

"I understand, BELIEVE me."

"I did crack at the end of it all though..." he admitted.

"What do you mean?"

"Elizabeth and I were finally getting through to this guy, the mist guy, and I knew it. I knew he was gonna send us back and so, right before..."

"What?" she prodded.

"We were *standing* in the gateroom back at the SGC and I looked up at the control room..."

"And I was there?"

He smiled wistfully. "AS much as I fought it, and as much as it hurt, I couldn't go without *seeing* you - one last time."

Logan softly caressed his cheek and smiled up at him. "So, there I stood, in all my uniformed glory?"

He suddenly grinned wickedly. "Actually, no..."

"No what?" she asked, puzzled.

"You weren't in uniform..."

She arched her eyebrow at him. "No? Was I wearing ANYTHING?"

"Well, yeah... You remember that sexy little black number you wore after we graduated from the Academy? That night we went out to celebrate?"

"The one you said would cause a riot?" she teased.

"It nearly did, but yeah, that one."

"Kind of out of place at the SGC," she teased.

"What can I say, my deluded mind worked in mysterious ways," he winked.

"So...What you're telling me," she sat up and climbed on top of him, holding his hands down at his sides. "Even back then, you kinda had... designs... on me?"

"Subconsciously, I guess I did..."

She sobered, somewhat as she looked down at him. "Even that brief glimpse... That must've hurt."

"It did... It just made me miss you more."

"I'm sorry..."

"For what?" he asked, puzzled.

"That you ever had to go through that."

"I'm sorry you had to, too," he untangled her hand from his and reached up to pull her face down to his. "I love you so much, Sparks..."

"I love you, too," she breathed.

His mouth closed over hers and she melted against him. For a while, both of them forgot that they were in the infirmary. They were completely oblivious to the possibility that anyone could walk into her room at any moment. Fortunately, the radio crackled to life and reminded them that they were not alone in the world just seconds before Beckett came into the room.


	80. Chapter 80

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"Dead?" Logan and Sheppard gasped together. "How?"

"As I told you, this strain of virus was more serious than we initially thought."

"Busek died from the bug?" Logan asked.

"I'm afraid he did. Once you were able to tell me who the only other person young Tommy had been around that day," he paused, shaking his head. "It took them this long just to find him."

"Where was he?" Sheppard asked.

"He was on the Genii homeworld, which, as near as I can tell, is where this particular virus originated from."

"Figures!" Sheppard muttered.

"Then *I* could have been the one to infect him..." Logan murmured sadly.

"I don't think so, Luv. It looks like this thing is pretty much isolated in an area far from the village where you were held. Busek and about a dozen other men were the only ones there, evacuating the villagers. We've checked the other men and they haven't been infected, but many of the villagers were. They were quarantined, as a matter of course, but roughly 3/4 of those villagers are either dead or dying already."

"Wait, did he KNOW this before he came back here and spent time with our son?" Sheppard asked angrily.

"I don't think so. The outbreak didn't really become apparent until a day or two later. Busek, for some reason, went back to the village he and the others had evacuated - alone - That's where they finally located his body."

"That's...awful," Logan choked back tears.

"Does his wife - Niresa - know?" Sheppard asked.

"Riateh is breaking the news now."

"Do we have an outbreak here, Carson?" Logan asked, reverting back to Head of Security mode.

"No Luv. You were isolated, remember? The soldiers back on the planet were quarantined and monitored, and so far none of them have contracted it. We dodged a bullet on this one."

"Busek didn't infect Niresa?" Logan asked incredulously.

"Fortunately for her, she was away when he made his brief trip back here. Young Tommy was the only person he really had any contact with - he wasn't here that long."

"It could have been much worse then."

"Much," Beckett agreed.

"And you're sure all the children are fine?" Logan pressed.

"We've triple and quadruple-checked all of them. I have to say, Luv, as much as I was against you healing the children, and John... It's a bloody good thing you didn't listen to me... In spite of what happened to you."

"They would have died, wouldn't they?" she asked, her face white with fear.

"Very likely."

"Oh my God," she gasped, shaking her head.

"But they didn't, WE didn't... And neither did _you_ , so don't even go there, Sparks." Sheppard admonished.

"Mommy!" she heard the chorus of children as they burst through the door.

Mitchell brought up the rear, carrying the twins, who were babbling incessantly and reaching their arms out for her. Logan choked back her tears and flashed them a brilliant smile. "Hey munchkins!" she greeted.

"I couldn't hold back the tide any longer," Mitchell groaned.

"Want Mama!" Tommy said, trying to climb up the side of the bed.

"Okay easy now monkeys!" Sheppard hissed, quietly but authoritatively. "Mommy is still recuperating and there are sick people here, so you need to use your indoor voices and be gentle with Mommy."

The children quieted down and tried to patiently wait their turn for a hug and cuddle from Logan. The twins were getting unruly, though, so she motioned Mitchell over to put them in the bed beside her. Both of them cuddled up against her as she hugged and kissed and talked softly to them. Then one by one, Sheppard let each of the kids get up on the bed and give Logan a kiss and a hug. Soon enough, though, all five kids were sitting atop the bed and chattering happily with their mother. Sheppard and Mitchell backed off a little, as it seemed she had all of them under control for the time being.

"You heard about Busek?" Mitchell asked.

He nodded. "Beckett just told us. How's Nerisa?"

"I think part of her knew already, since she hadn't heard from him in so long, so she was prepared. Riateh is going to stay with her for a while, just to make sure she's okay."

"That's good."

"I was going to ask how Logan's doing but..." pointing at Logan and the kids. "It looks like she's doing just fine."

Sheppard smiled warmly over at his wife. "She's amazing."

Like he needed anyone to tell him that. "Someday you're going to have to tell me how you did... what you did."

Sheppard looked over at Mitchell and grinned sheepishly. "If I ever figure it out, you'll be one of the first I tell," he assured him.

The children stayed with Logan until lunch time, then she insisted that both Sheppard and Mitchell take them to the mess hall to feed them together. When Sheppard balked at leaving her alone, she insisted, pointing out that all five of them were too much of a handful for one person to deal with.

"But... YOU do it," Sheppard countered.

"Not alone... very often... I usually have you around."

"Not when I'm on a mission," he reminded her.

"I have plenty of help when you're not around. Now stop fighting me and go help Cam with the kids," she scolded gently.

Sheppard reluctantly followed Mitchell, who was carrying the twins. He took Chelsea and Nic by the hand, while Chelsea held firmly to Tommy's little hand and they all waved goodbye to Logan. After they had gone, Logan took a deep breath, sighed and leaned back against her pillows.

"It's good to be the Queen," she snarked to herself.

LATER THAT NIGHT

Logan awoke to find Mitchell and the twins fast asleep in a chair by her bedside. The twins were cuddled snugly against him on either side. She smiled as she studied each of them carefully. Scott looked so much like Mitchell, as much as the other kids resembled Sheppard. Cadence looked more like her with each passing day; the only exception being that she had her father's crystal blue eyes instead of her own emerald green.

A quick glance at the clock in her room told her that it was barely past 9 pm, far too early for Mitchell to be so exhausted. Poor guy, Logan thought. He really had taken on a lot since she fell ill. The twins were enough to wear anyone out, but all five of the kids? Even with Riateh helping him, it was still a lot to handle. She shook her head and smiled gratefully. She was so lucky to have him in her life, to have _them_. Riateh was an amazing woman and she was so glad she and Cameron had found each other.

Unable to resist the pull of her youngest children, she quietly got out of bed and tiptoed over to the chair they were sleeping in. She tenderly kissed each child, softly stroking their silken hair and breathing in their familiar scent. She longed to hold them, but she didn't want to risk waking them. She did, however, unintentionally wake Mitchell up.

"Hey," he croaked hoarsely.

"Hey sleepyhead," she whispered.

"Sorry, didn't mean to fall asleep on you," he grinned sheepishly.

"It's understandable," she smiled.

"The twins were a little restless, so I took them for a walk and we just ended up here... I thought you might like to see them."

"I do... Thanks for bringing them."

"Sorry they fell asleep on you, too," he apologized around a yawn.

"That's okay. I've always enjoyed just watching them sleep."

"I remember," he smiled warmly up at her.

"You've been really great... helping with the kids and... everything."

"I love being with them, you know that. And you know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you."

She bent down and kissed him gently on the forehead. "Yes, I do know that, and I'm very grateful."

"You know... You really had me scared there for a while..." he arched an eyebrow at her.

"I'm sorry, Cam."

"Then when John went and... you know..." he trailed off with a slight shrug.

"Kinda made you mad, didn't it?"

He hadn't wanted to say, but he knew she could tell anyway. "Yeah... I just...I didn't want the kids to lose both their parents, and the twins to lose their mother..."

"I understand."

"I'm not saying I wouldn't have done the same thing as John, if I could, I just..." he trailed off with a shrug.

"It's scary being the one who's left behind."

"Yeah, it is..." he nodded.

"I know you would have taken on all five of the kids if anything had happened to us," she told him.

"I would have... I love those kids, every last one of them, but... I love you guys, too."

"I know, Cam, and we love you."

"I don't want to lose you... Either of you. Been there, done that with John, damn near so with you, too."

"We don't want to lose you either," she smiled.

"Please... Don't scare me like that again?" he pleaded.

"I'll try not to, okay?"

"Fair enough..."

"You okay?" she asked. "Kids wearing you out too much?"

"Riateh helps a lot," he smiled.

"When are you going to make an honest woman out of her, Cam?" she asked casually.

Mitchell froze, gaping at her. "Excuse me?"

"You love her, she loves you, so...?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

"I...uh..."

"You...uh... _What_?" Logan teased. "Don't you WANT to get married?"

"I...uh...sure...yeah, but..." he stammered uncomfortably.

"But what? It's not like you need to get anyone's permission or anything. The twins love her, WE love her, more importantly YOU love her, so... what's holding you back?"

"I...don't know..." he admitted.

"Cam...You deserve to be happy. Riateh makes you happy. I know the thought of more kids might make you feel queasy right now, given what you've been going through lately, but... The two of you fit together so well. You told me you always wanted a big family. Marrying her and maybe having another kid or three will fulfill that dream."

Mitchell stifled the sudden urge to bolt. "So, what? Eight, ten kids between us?" his face reddened, but he couldn't hold back a smile.

"One big happy family," she grinned.

"You _do_ like her, don't you?" It was more a statement than a question.

"I love her to death, AND I trust her. You know I don't have that kind of trust in many people."

"Yes, I do..."

"Don't put it off, Cam, if that's what you're doing. You and I both know how easily, and how FAST things can go wrong."

"I'll think about what you said, how's that?"

"Fair enough."

TWO DAYS LATER

Logan looked around the quiet, empty living room and sighed happily. God, it was so good to be home...FINALLY! Sheppard had already told her that the kids wouldn't be there when they got back to their quarters, but she was still unprepared for the peaceful silence that greeted her when she walked through the door. She was pleased to see that the place was immaculate. Clearly someone, probably Riateh, had been keeping everyone on their toes as far as keeping up with the chores.

"Feel good?" Sheppard asked knowingly.

"Very," she sighed.

"Maybe you should go take a nap before the munchkins invade?" he suggested.

Logan eyed him thoughtfully. "And what would you do to keep yourself occupied if I took a nap?" she asked.

"Oh... I dunno...Read or... something," he shrugged.

"Suppose I have a better idea," she smiled seductively as she ran a fingertip over his shoulder and down his chest.

His nether regions immediately sprang to life. "Uh... Like what?" he asked hoarsely.

"Well, you know... I never did have the chance to welcome YOU home properly...Before everyone got sick and all..."

"Yes... I seem to recall you promising me something like that..." he smiled.

"And I ALWAAAAYS keep my promises... don't I, flyboy?"

He could barely hold a coherent thought as her hands began to roam over his chest, around his waist and settled on his rear.

"Uh...Yes...Yes, you do," he croaked.

He gasped as her mouth began trailing soft kisses along his neck. She wasn't making it easy for him to resist, but he'd promised himself that he would allow her to rest and resist the urge to jump her the moment they got home.

"You know, come to think of it..."

She suddenly grabbed the front of his button-down shirt and tore the two sides apart, sending buttons flying all over the room and leaving his bare chest exposed. Sheppard gasped as her hands traced over his chest and up to his shoulders, pushing his shirt down his back.

"...You now owe ME a proper welcome home, too, so... why don't we take care of all that right now?" she whispered seductively.

"Uh...Sparks...Are you...Didn't Beckett say you were supposed to...Oooohhhhh, God..." he groaned as her mouth clamped down on the pulse point on his throat and began to suck.

"We can rest later," she murmured.

"I... Are you sure?" he croaked, his voice hoarse.

"I've missed you... so much..." she said, taking a step back.

The sundress she was wearing suddenly slipped off and over her head, leaving her standing there in only her panties. Sheppard groaned and took a step towards her. With a playful glint in her eye, Logan took a step backward, remaining just out of his reach.

"Course... if you'd rather NOT..." she grinned wickedly. "If you'd rather read a book..." she taunted.

He lunged forward and captured her in his arms. "You know I'd rather read YOU!" he groaned before crushing his mouth to hers.

LATER THAT DAY

"Niresa...What are you saying?" Logan gasped.

"It was Busek..." she murmured sadly.

"No... Yehra killed _herself_..." Sheppard shook his head.

"No, John... She was on her way to kill _you_ , and your children... but Busek... stopped her."

"Did he tell you this?" Sheppard asked.

"He left behind a personal account of what happened... He was full of remorse, but he knew he did the right thing."

Busek had come upon Yehra as she was making her way to the Sheppard family quarters. If she could not have him, she certainly wouldn't allow Logan to have him, or his children. She would take all of them with her and then they would be together forever, as it always should have been. He had desperately tried to reason with her, to talk her out of the madness that had come over her, but to no avail.

All of her history with Busek seemed to fade away and all she could see was her desperate obsession for Sheppard. When it became clear that Busek would not allow her to carry out her plan, she turned on him and tried to kill him. They struggled for the weapon for some time before Busek finally managed to gain the upper hand. Yehra stumbled backwards toward the railing as he pushed her off of him. Her eyes were full of hate; they were not the eyes of his lifelong friend.

Knowing what she was capable of, and that she would never again be the Yehra he had known and loved his entire life, he did the only thing he could do in order to save Sheppard, his family and to spare Yehra the torment of living as she was now. Before she could regain her balance, he fired the weapon, striking her in the head. Her body flew backwards over the railing and fell to the ocean below.

Grief and anger over what she had forced him to do made him flee, for a time. He needed to process what it was he'd just done. Yehra was his dearest friend, and he had killed her. True, she'd been about to do the same to him, and to Sheppard and his children, but still... He had eventually come to terms with what had happened, and he accepted that his actions had spared many people, Yehra herself included, more of the grief she surely would have inflicted upon them. Tommy was now free to call Logan "mother" and to enjoy all the love and care she had to offer him. He would have a real mother now. Sheppard was now free to enjoy his wife and family without fear that Yehra would somehow do something to destroy their happiness. Logan, too, was free to enjoy her family. As for Yehra? She was simply free of the pain and agony of her mental deterioration.

He had considered, many times before, coming forward to tell the truth about how Yehra had really died. Busek had never considered himself a coward, and he was not afraid to live with any punishment the Earthlings saw fit to bestow upon him, according to their laws. But he was the only one who could truly give Tommy a sense of who his mother had been before the madness had taken her. They all wanted Tommy to know about his birth mother, and Busek was the best person to teach him about the real Yehra. For this reason, and this reason alone, he kept silent. He left the record of what had really happened, in the event of his death, so that the others would know what he had done.

Sheppard and Logan reeled with the revelation, but neither of them condemned Busek. Having been lifelong friends themselves, they each knew what it must have cost him to take the life of his dearest friend, madness or no. While it was somewhat comforting to know that Yehra had not taken her own life by her own hand, they both knew that she might as well have, as she'd given Busek no choice but to kill her.

"I leave it up to you, now, to decide what to do about this information," Niresa sniffled.

Logan and Sheppard exchanged a brief glance. "This stays with us, Niresa."

"I... I beg your pardon?" she asked incredulously.

"As far as we're concerned, Busek had no choice but to do what he did. And he is gone now, too. There is no point in bringing this out in the open. We know the truth, that's all that matters." Logan said.

"You are...most kind..."

"Kindness has nothing to do with it," Sheppard patted her hand consolingly. "That's just the way it is. Let him rest in peace."


	81. Chapter 81

TWO WEEKS LATER

Life in Atlantis quickly resumed as it had before the virus had invaded the Sheppard clan and nearly claimed Logan's life. With normality, came responsibility. Logan took back the mantle of Head of Security and the unfinished business of dealing with the former leader of Genii had finally come to pass.

The turnover of Cowan and Turfa took place aboard the Daedalus. Cowan and Turfa were beamed aboard first and then the Daedalus travelled to the Genii homeworld to pick up Roth and the members of his new cabinet. It had been a surprisingly smooth transition for the new government. Apparently most of the Genii population was as sick of Cowan and his ways as the rebels who brought about the coup.

Steadfast hardliners had quickly been singled out and removed from the general population. Those who still refused to support the new government were turned over to Roth, for him to decide their fate. It hadn't taken long at all for the earthlings to help train and organize a new military force, as well as a system of laws to help the new government function efficiently. Sora, the real one, had accepted a post on Roth's new cabinet, and she was quickly establishing herself as a valuable asset to him.

On board the Daedalus for the prisoner transfer were Caldwell, O'Neill, Weir, Daniel, Sheppard, Logan, Mitchell, Riateh, Teal'c and Teyla. Though she tried not to, Logan was hard pressed to stifle a smirk when Cowan was brought before the new ruling cabinet of Genii. He was as arrogant and pompous as ever, which, under the circumstances, was extremely amusing.

He turned and glared at Logan and Sheppard as he passed by them, though they both flashed him a dazzling smile. A sharp glance from Caldwell quickly sobered them, though, and they resumed a stoic stance. Roth stood as Cowan was brought before him and looked Cowan right in the eye.

"I warned you that this day would come," Roth said.

"You are a FOOL if you believe that my people will recognize your authority," Cowan hissed.

"You are the fool Cowan," Sora stood. "The Genii have not only recognized the new government, but support it, whole-heartedly."

"You lie!" he accused.

"I do not. Too many of our people have been lost to the Wraith, and to your ridiculous need to best those who offered us nothing but help and friendship, the same ones who could have helped protect our people from the cullings. No more, Cowan...Never again!"

Logan eyed her carefully. She certainly did sound like the Sora Weir had told her about. She hoped that Sora really was as honest and sincere as she sounded, for the sake of her people. Neither Logan or Sheppard were given to trust where the Genii were concerned, but they knew that they had to start somewhere.

They were not about to reveal the truth about Atlantis, alliance or no. Roth had proven to be true to his word, so far, but there were too many others who could turn against them at any time. They couldn't afford to risk exposing the truth to anyone who might use it against them.

"Former Chief Cowan, you are hereby released into the custody and mercy of the new Genii government." Caldwell said. "You will be transported back down to the planet, directly into a holding cell, to await the judgement of your people."

Before he could speak, a bright light flared and both Cowan and Turfa vanished, along with Roth and several of his guards.

"Thank you... For all you have done for my people," Sora said.

"We look forward to better relations between our two people from here on out, Sora." Weir smiled.

"So do we."

"The installation of your new shield should be complete within the week. After that, we'll take things one day at a time," Caldwell said.

"Thank you again," Sora smiled.

"Good luck," Sheppard smiled.

"We no longer need luck, John Sheppard, we have good friends now."

Caldwell signaled to the deck officer and the rest of Sora's people were beamed down, along with her. Once they were gone and the Daedalus was, once again, underway, Sheppard surveyed the assembled staff. "So...Now we party?" he asked.

O'Neill grinned as everyone turned to look at him. "Oh yeah... We party!"

SIX MONTHS LATER

"Come on Elizabeth! You NEVER get out to do stuff like this!"

Weir smiled at her. "Neither do you," she pointed out.

Logan paused for a moment. "All the more reason why we should do it now! Come on, Tarek can handle all the parental responsibilities for one day."

"Sure he can, but does he want to?"

"Not the point...You deserve this and we won't take no for an answer!" Logan insisted.

"Who else is going?"

"Riateh, myself, Janet, Teyla, Kitah, Lyta - Carter can't make it though - and the girls: Chelsea, Hope, and Riley. Strictly girls day out."

"It does sound tempting..." Weir admitted.

"Are you kidding? Teyla's description alone was all I needed to convince me. Back on Earth people pay a fortune for the same kind of spa day...Sort of..."

"I know."

"Say you'll come."

"Alright... But hey, didn't John object when you first brought it up?" Weir asked.

"Object? No... He wanted to go... just the two of us, but..."

"Another time?"

"Of course!" Logan winked.

LATER THAT NIGHT

As Logan packed a small duffel for herself and Chelsea, Sheppard again questioned her on the wisdom of such an outing.

"You're not insinuating that we women can't take care of ourselves, are you?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

"Absolutely not," he deadpanned. "I happen to want to live..."

"Funny!" She quipped as she flung a shoe at him. "Come on sweetheart, I told you...Chelsea and I never get to do anything girly together. It'll be good for us to have this time to bond and... stuff..."

"And stuff? Besides, you're already bonded," he argued.

"Bond with other _girls_. The poor thing is surrounded by males all the time..."

"She has a sister..." he muttered feebly.

"Who is a _baby_ ," she reminded him.

"And she has Hope and Riley..." he ventured.

She stopped what she was doing and turned around to look him in the eye. "Do you really _not_ want us to go?" she asked.

"No...Yeah...Wait...Look, of course I want you to have fun..." he stammered.

"Just not without you?" she asked.

"Yeah..."

"Uh-huh...I thought so. Look at it this way, you'll have a chance for all kinds of male bonding while we're away. You all can help each other when the kids get to be too much for you!" she smiled serenely.

"Too much...Wait, you think we can't handle watching our own children for a day?"

"Doesn't appear that way, what with all the fuss you guys are raising..." she teased.

"Hey...I can handle anything these kids can dish out!"

She patted him gently on the cheek. "Of COURSE you can, babe..." she said condescendingly.

"I _can_!" he protested.

"I know..."

"Alright, alright, I'll _show_ you. You girls go ahead on your little day trip. You'll see...We're gonna be _just_ fine."

"Of course you are."

"You'll see!" he repeated.

"I'm sure I will dear," she replied.

They heard giggling coming from Chelsea's room and deduced that she had been listening in on their conversation. Chelsea knew well the tone of voice her mother was using to humor Sheppard and found it inordinately humorous.

"Et tu, Brute?" he hollered down the hall, eliciting shrieks of laughter from her.

"I love you Daddy," she said in a perfect imitation of Logan's tone.

"I love you too, Sweet-pea!" he hollered back, looking at Logan. "I don't really think you need any more bonding, she's already getting to be more like you every day!"

"Thank you, dear, but I think we both know who she takes after the most."

Sheppard shook his head and walked over to wrap his arms around Logan from behind. He nuzzled her neck and whispered in her ear.

"You know...Since you're leaving so early in the morning, it should be an early bedtime for...all...of us..." he murmured.

"Trust me, Flyboy, I don't intend on going anywhere without a... proper... sendoff," she smiled up at him.

The following morning, Logan and her party gathered together in the gateroom. Logan, Riateh, Weir, Kitah, Lyta, Janet, Chelsea, Riley and Hope. Out of all of them only Logan, Janet and Weir had any real idea of the treat they had in store for them. Teyla had a bit of an idea, but she had never actually set foot in the mineral springs they had found on R95-003. The men had gamely bid them farewell, but only Tarek and Mitchell accompanied them to the gateroom. Mitchell would be heading to the Sheppard quarters soon, to help Sheppard with the children, as was only fair, since two of them were his, but the other men were totally on their own.

"Please explain to me this "girls day out" Elizabeth spoke of?" Tarek asked Mitchell.

He shrugged, unsure as to how to explain to him the need for women to sometimes band together and...well...make fun of their men. "Sometimes women just need the company of other women - away from men."

Tarek nodded. "For what purpose?" he asked, clearly intrigued.

"It gives them a chance to make fun of us," he explained with a shrug.

"Us?"

" _Men_ , in general, and us (indicating himself and Tarek) specifically."

Tarek was still confused. "But why?" he asked.

Mitchell shrugged again. "I dunno... Maybe it makes them feel better about the choices they made...in mates."

"I do not understand."

"Join the club, brother. Once they get together and compare all the stupid things we men do... And they get a good laugh out of it..."

"Ah...I think I see now."

"Really? Mind explaining it to me?" he smiled.

Riateh came over and kissed Mitchell deeply. "Never you mind, Cameron Mitchell... It is not something men will ever understand. You should not try so hard...You might hurt something."

The women burst out laughing when she turned around and winked at them.

"And so it begins!" Mitchell smiled good-naturedly. "Hey! Come here sweet-pea!" he called to Chelsea.

"Yes sir?" she smiled up at him.

He picked her up and gave her a fierce hug. "Don't you let them turn you against us, you hear?" he whispered in her ear.

"Don't worry, Uncle Cam, I'll still love you."

"Music to my ears," he winked. "Have fun, ladies!" he called out as the wormhole engaged.

They called out their goodbyes and hurried through the gate.

TWO HOURS LATER - 003

The women were happily immersed in the largest mineral spring pool together, content merely to relax and soak up the ambiance surrounding them. This planet had been a real find and would undoubtedly become THE most requested destination for R & R for the base personnel. Not only were the mineral springs absolutely divine, the entire area just oozed peace and relaxation.

The children, too, were calm and tranquil as they soaked alongside the other women in the springs. So tranquil was the place that everyone automatically spoke in quieter, almost hushed tones, so as not to disturb the peacefulness.

"I'm really surprised they didn't insist on coming along," Janet pointed out.

"As am I," Teyla agreed. "Colonel Sheppard's eyes lit up when he first saw this place...It was as if it took a great deal of will for him not to jump right into the waters."

"Fully dressed," Logan murmured knowingly.

"Precisely. It was difficult to pull him away. Dr. McKay as well."

"Now you know why," Weir observed.

"Indeed," she smiled. "I have never bathed in such waters as this before. It is clear to me now why you three were so excited about spending the day here."

"Back on Earth, people pay BIG money to go to places like this," Logan informed her.

"I can see why," Riateh chimed in.

"It is...wonderful..." Kitah purred.

Logan looked down at the contented smile on Chelsea's face, it was mirrored by Hope and Riley, who were sitting next to her. She was looking forward to spending some time alone here with Sheppard, and SOON, but she was happy they had made this outing a girls only event.

"Do we really have to go back today?" Lyta asked.

"I vote we stay the night," Kitah murmured softly.

"I think the men would hunt us down and drag us back forcibly," Janet replied.

"Buncha sissies!" Chelsea chirped.

"Chelsea!" Logan choked back a bark of laughter.

"Geez mom, they can't even get by for one day and night without us?!" she rolled her eyes.

The other women laughed.

"Looks like she's catching on early," Weir noted.

"Yes. But look who her male role models are!" Riateh giggled.

That set all of them off into fits of giggles. Even the three youngest ones knew that, although greatly respected, Sheppard and Mitchell, in particular, were often times also thought of as great big kids. It was one of the qualities that endeared them to all of the children of Atlantis.

ATLANTIS

Back on Atlantis, the men weren't having nearly as much fun. Even between the two of them, Mitchell and Sheppard were having a hard time keeping up with four rambunctious kids. It never seemed this hard when Logan was the only other adult around, why were they having such a hard time now?

"They don't pull this stuff when Logan's around," Mitchell deduced.

Sheppard shot him a dubious look. "Are you sure?"

Mitchell nodded as he watched Tommy jumping up and down on the sofa. "Yeah..."

"Why not?" Sheppard asked, clearly mystified.

Mitchell shook his head wearily. "Because... She never lets them eat their body weight in ice-cream and candy."

Sheppard winced. He knew he'd have to answer to Logan for that. "Oh. Right."

"We gotta do something to burn off some of their energy!" Mitchell exclaimed.

"I could go get a tranq gun," Sheppard said, only half-joking.

Mitchell shook his head vehemently. "Logan and Riateh BOTH would kick our asses if we did that!"

"Right... Maybe Beckett has some little kiddy-sedatives or something?" Sheppard ventured half-heartedly.

"Do you really think he'd give it to us?" Mitchell asked, almost hopeful.

"No... But he'd sure as hell tell Logan that we asked for some," Sheppard sighed.

"Scratch that idea then," Mitchell groaned.

"We're gonna have to PHYSICALLY tire them out," Sheppard sighed.

"I don't have the energy to physically tire them out," Mitchell complained.

"Me either." Sheppard groaned.

"Let's get Lorne!" Mitchell suggested.

Sheppard shook his head negatively. "Caldwell already commandeered him."

"Ronan?"

"He's helping Daniel."

"That sissy! He's only got TWO kids to take care of!" Mitchell sneered.

"Yeah..."

"We never should have let them have that cake... or the cookies... or the candy..." Mitchell moaned.

"The ice-cream was okay though... right?" Sheppard looked over at him dubiously.

"Oh yeah, sure...We HAD to let them have ice-cream..." Mitchell nodded.

R95-003

"So there's Daniel, up on the stage...ONE beer mind you...and he's singing at the top of his lungs, shaking his hips...I still, to this day, don't know what that song was!" Janet finished as all the women cackled gleefully at the image she'd presented.

"It was Blue Suede Shoes, Janet," Logan giggled.

Janet was right. Daniel never could hold his liquor and his rendition of the Elvis version of that song was indelibly etched in her memory. That had been right before Daniel *died* and Ascended, and it was still one of her happiest memories of him. Logan glanced over and saw Kitah looking at her curiously. There was no malicious gleam in her eye or anything, but Logan suddenly became quite uncomfortable. Looking around the circle of women, it suddenly hit her, hard and fast, that she *knew* their men intimately - with the exception of Weir, Lyta and Janet. She blushed self-consciously. Sheppard, Daniel, Mitchell... Of the four men she had been with in her life, three now resided in Atlantis, two of them now belonged to other women - her closest female friends - and two of them had fathered her children. Talk about awkward. She didn't have time to dwell on it any further, as the children diverted her attention away with calls for stories about Sheppard. She shook off her unease, for now, and gladly began regaling them all with stories from her childhood, stories about growing up with the man who would one day become her husband.

"It is easy to picture him as a child," Lyta smiled. "One has only to look at young Nicolas or Tommy to see Sheppard at the same age."

"Or Chelsea," Logan added with a smile. "She may be a girl, but she is sooooo much like him, in so many ways."

Chelsea looked up at her mother. "Daddy says that I'm just like you."

"In some ways," she hugged her close. "But you have much of your Daddy in you, my love."

"Is that a bad thing?" she asked tentatively.

"Not at all, sweetie. I happen to love your Daddy very, very much."

Chelsea beamed up at her happily. "Yeah... He loves you bunches, too."

Hours later, Logan began feeling the same sense of discomfort when she found herself alone with Kitah. The others had gone back in the springs, while she and Kitah cleaned up around their temporary encampment.

"May I ask you something?" Kitah asked.

"Sure," Logan replied breezily.

"Does it make you uncomfortable to be around Daniel or myself?"

"I...What do you mean? Kitah...We've been friends for years."

"Yes. We have, and I am happy about that."

"As am I."

"But...I saw your face earlier...and..." she trailed off, apparently unable to find the words to convey her thought.

"And...what?" Logan asked.

"You have quite a long history with Daniel..."

Logan nodded. Crap, she thought. This had been what she was afraid of. "Yes, I do. You knew that when the two of you first became friends."

"Yes...I have to confess, your history with Daniel concerned me...at first..."

"How so?"

"I...noticed Daniel long before he noticed me. I...watched him...whenever I could."

"Daniel and I were not together then..."

"Perhaps YOU were not, but Daniel was still very much... attached... to you."

Logan thought back to that time. It was true. they had both still had some unresolved feelings when she'd first come to Atlantis. Hell, when she'd first returned from Afghanistan. They knew in their heads that their relationship was over, but their hearts were a little slow on the uptake.

"Daniel has told me some of what transpired between you...Why you could not be together."

"I see," was all Logan could say.

"It had nothing to do with a lack of love between you."

"No, it didn't."

"It must have been hard...for you to let go of one you loved so much."

"At times. I don't know how much Daniel has told you, but it was the best decision for both of us. You know what happened to his first wife, Sha're?"

"Yes."

"Daniel never really got over that, no matter what he says. Now, I don't mean to say he never got over HER, specifically. There is a part of Daniel that will always love her, as it should be, but he did manage to move on."

"To you."

"Yes. The absolutely wrongest person for him in the world."

"What do you mean?" Kitah gasped.

"One of the things Daniel could never let go of, was wanting to protect the people he loved. I'm not saying that's a bad quality, it's something we all share, of course, but Daniel...He feels things so deeply, as you know. He..." she trailed off, trying to find the right words. "For his own sake, the last thing Daniel needed was to fall in love with a woman who was out there doing the same thing he was doing."

"You are speaking of off-world missions?" Kitah asked.

"Yes. Being out there himself, he knew EXACTLY what I was facing on a daily basis. He couldn't take it. He wasn't wrong for wanting me to be safe, but..."

"You could not change who you are."

"Right. What Daniel wanted wasn't wrong, for him, but it was wrong for me."

"He wanted you to remain on Earth, safe from harm."

"Yes."

"And you did not want to remain safe on Earth."

"Oh, I wanted to be safe, but I also wanted to do my part to keep everyone on Earth safe."

"I see."

"Why are you bringing all of this up now? You aren't still concerned that we..."

"Oh...no!" she paused. "Not really..."

"Not really? You know, there was a time, when Daniel and I first got together that I felt...insecure..."

"YOU?!" she chuckled.

"Yes, me! Of course, me! I was afraid that I wouldn't and couldn't ever measure up to Sha're."

"But Logan...You are so beautiful."

"Sha're was beautiful."

"Yes...I have seen images of her...But you... You are strong and brave and funny... I have seen the way men look at you, but you are not even aware...You can do things that I could never do... I could never hope to be all that you are."

"Trust me, it's not all that you make it out to be, not even close," Logan blushed. "And Daniel LOVES you."

"He loved you."

"Once," Logan nodded and shrugged. "A very long time ago. Daniel could never live with who I was and what I did. Listen, I got over my insecurities about Sha're because I finally realized that I didn't have to compete with her. Daniel had plenty of women just dying to be with him, but he chose me. Stupidly, of course, but he did."

"Yes."

"The point is, Kitah, he chose YOU. Not only that, but he MARRIED you, built a family with YOU."

"Yes. I am ashamed to admit that I have often wondered if that was only because he could not have you," she admitted.

"What?!" Logan gasped.

"I know how deeply you love your husband. We all saw you grieve when we thought he was dead. We see it every day, every time you look at him."

"Then why would you..." she trailed off in confusion.

"I am not as sure that Daniel would have turned to me if you had still been an option," she sighed.

"I can answer that for you... _YES_!" Logan said emphatically.

"You seem quite sure of that," she smiled.

"I am, and with good reason... Do you remember when I had amnesia... years ago?"

"Indeed. Daniel and I had just begun to..." she trailed off, blushing furiously.

"Right. I... when I first woke up, I couldn't remember anything after a certain point in my life. That point was when Daniel and I were still together."

"I remember."

"It was, for me, as if I were still living in that time. My feelings for Daniel were as strong and real as they had been before. For me, no time had passed."

"It must have been very difficult and confusing for you."

"Yes, it was. Point is, if Daniel had been looking for any excuse to get back together with me, THAT would have been the time. He had the perfect opportunity. There I was, madly in love with him...If he'd wanted me at all, he would have...you know...seized the chance. But, it wasn't me he wanted, Kitah...It was YOU."

"How do you know this?"

"Simple... He TOLD me. In his gentle, sensitive, Daniel way, but in no uncertain terms. He wanted you, he LOVED you."

"I did not know this..." she smiled.

"Have you told him how you're feeling? He would have told you this himself."

"I...no..." she shook her head and looked downward.

"Wait, if you're so sure that *I* don't harbor any feelings for Daniel, why are you so... Has Daniel..."

"He has been...restless...of late."

"Restless?" Logan arched an eyebrow at her.

"He has been dreaming... strange, disturbing dreams... He won't talk about it."

"Dreams of what?"

"He has been speaking...in his sleep...I have heard him call out your name. And Oma's...Some of his dreams seem to be of a time when he was Ascended, but..."

"And he refuses to talk about it?"

"Sometimes he says he doesn't remember what he dreamed."

"That may be true. His memories were blurred by Oma when she sent him back to us. He will remember isolated things from time to time, but..."

"I know Daniel loves me... And our children..."

"He most certainly does. Never doubt that," Logan assured her.

"I suppose his dreams have brought up old feelings of insecurity."

"I'm sorry about that...I...I've always been very proud that Daniel and I were able to remain friends after we broke up, but if that bothers you..."

"No! Please, I do not mean to imply that I wish you to end your friendship with him, or with me!" she said frantically.

"I...Kitah, I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable."

Kitah chuckled good-naturedly at that. "Dear, dear Logan... You really have no idea, do you?"

"About what?"

"I say this to you as your friend... You have but to walk into a room for any woman to see you as a threat."

"What?!"

"Seriously. You are so completely unaware of the effect you have on a man - even without opening your mouth to speak."

"You give me far too much credit," Logan blushed again.

"And you give yourself far too little."

Logan gasped as she turned to find Lyta standing behind them. "Lyta!"

"Kitah is right."

"She is not... And I know YOU don't see me as a threat!"

"There are times when I have... Although briefly."

"Why?" Logan was crushed.

"Your relationship with Steven was not the same as with Daniel, but the two of you have known one another for a very long time."

"Well...Yeah...We worked together long before we came here..." she fidgeted.

"He cares for you... Moreso than the others he commands..." Lyta pointed out.

"No... He cares about _all_ of his people."

"Yes, he does. But there are very few he trusts enough to be... himself... with."

Lyta had her there. "Don't confuse trust with...something more..." Logan said.

"Please understand, Logan. I am not accusing you of anything. I would likely be more insecure had you been... intimate... with Steven, the way you were with Daniel. I just... You are the one person, besides myself, that Steven trusts that deeply. We named our daughter for you."

Logan felt her stomach churn. It served no one, least of all Lyta, to tell her the whole truth, but it burned in her gut nonetheless. "I..."

"I am sorry, you must feel as though we are attacking you!"

"No! I just... I never realized that I had caused you any pain..."

"Not you, dear one... You have never intentionally hurt either one of us, nor Riateh."

"Riateh?!" Logan gasped, looking over at her newest friend sitting in the spring with her daughter.

"Rest easy, she has expressed none of the...fears...either one of us has wrestled with."

"I'm so sorry..." Logan shook her head.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. It is not your fault that you are... everything you are. You have never once given us reason to believe that you would try and... take our husbands from us."

"Never! I love John with my whole heart and soul... And even if I didn't..."

"We know this. Let us leave it at our own insecurities - about our own failings," Lyta took Logan's hands in hers.

"What failings? You both are completely loved and adored by your husbands."

"Perhaps it is simply a matter of feeling that you know them better than we do."

"I may have known them _longer_ , ladies, that doesn't mean I know them _better_."

"Perhaps not. But you have worked with them, both of them. You have shared with them what they will not share with us, out of concern or protection. You have seen the side of them that comes out only when they are working..."

"You have seen them defend Atlantis," Logan reminded them.

"Yes... It is not the same, and not to the degree that you have."

"But..."

"But, that is not your fault. And we are sorry if we have made you feel that it is," Kitah told her.

"They love you... More than you realize, I guess."

"We know they love us. But, it is the nature of women to feel... territorial...when another, more beautiful and exciting woman is nearby."

"I would never..."

"We know, Logan."

"I wish we could have talked about this sooner. I had no idea you were feeling this way."

"We both consider you to be a friend, a true friend. You have protected us and our children countless times and in countless ways. You have proven yourself to be a true friend more times than we can count. Forgive us for being so..." Lyta trailed off.

"Childish," Kitah finished for Lyta.

"If you forgive me for being so dense," Logan sighed.

Both of them laughed. "The fact that you are so unaware of your own beauty merely adds to it."

"No more worries about your men, please? Not from me?"

"Agreed," they said together, enveloping Logan in a big bear hug.

"Good...Now let's hit those springs again, before we run out of daylight!"


	82. Chapter 82

ATLANTIS

Sheppard and Mitchell walked into the mess hall with all four children in tow. One look at Caldwell and Daniel told them that they were having as easy a time of it as they were. Child care really did seem much easier when the women were around, for some reason, though they all still steadfastly refused to admit that perhaps the women did carry the bulk of the load.

"What are you complaining about, sir? Your kids are all past the baby stage!" Daniel complained to Caldwell.

"Have you MET my son, Dr. Jackson?!" Caldwell arched an eyebrow at him.

The other men laughed.

"Torus helps, but Sam... He just... He gets into... He's... He reminds me of SHEPPARD!" he pointed an accusing finger at Sheppard.

Sheppard blinked innocently. "Don't look at me, sir, all of mine are accounted for!"

"Har-har! I mean he just reminds me of that special knack you have for always finding trouble."

"Trouble finds me, sir, I don't go looking for it!" Sheppard protested.

"Yeah well... It's the same for him then!"

"That's great, John... Now your qualities are rubbing off on _other_ people's kids!" Mitchell ribbed him.

Alyssia took that very moment to let out a huge expulsion of gas, sending the other children into fits of laughter, while the men simply scrunched up their faces as they caught a whiff of her rapidly filling diaper.

"Ohhhh! Geez Daniel! What the hell you been feeding her?!" Sheppard teased, waving a hand in front of his face.

"You're not going to change her HERE, are you?" Mitchell eyed him warily.

"No," Daniel sulked. "Can you guys keep an eye on David for me?"

"Thought you had Ronan to help you," Mitchell teased.

"He got... tired."

"Ronan?!" they all gasped in unison.

"Yeah... Even I don't believe that one."

They all roared with laughter as Daniel excused himself to go and change Alyssia's diaper in privacy.

"Want cake!" Tommy piped up.

"Yeah!" said Nic excitedly.

Sheppard and Mitchell exchanged horrified glances before replying: "Oh HELL no!" before sending Tommy and Nic off to get a real dinner from the cook, while Mitchell bounced the twins on his lap.

Caldwell chuckled, having seen them both trying to wear the kids out earlier.

"Hey, you fed Sam some junk earlier too!" Sheppard pointed out.

"Yeah, then I sent him on a run with Lorne. I ain't no dummy!" Caldwell grinned.

"We tried to get McKay to help out but he kept making excuses about having some experiments he had to keep an eye on," Mitchell groused.

"Yeah, delicate stuff, he said," Sheppard agreed.

"Uh-huh... Just like Ronan was TIRED!" Caldwell laughed.

"I don't get it... We have GOOD kids... Why wouldn't anyone want to spend time with them?" Sheppard asked.

"They ARE good kids," Mitchell agreed.

Caldwell nodded. "I agree."

"You think the women told them not to?" Mitchell ventured.

"They wouldn't! Would they?" Caldwell asked, suddenly uncertain.

"Logan would," Sheppard replied flatly. He knew his wife all too well.

Caldwell and Mitchell looked at him for a moment. "Yeah, she would," Mitchell said.

"You're right, she _definitely_ would AND she'd get the others to go along with it."

Tarek came in just then, looking exhausted and in desperate need of adult conversation. They waved him over and made room for he and his daughter at the table they were occupying.

"I think the Elizabeth may have told everyone not to help me today," he announced grumpily.

"You THINK?!" Sheppard chuckled, slapping him on the back.

 **003**

The women in question were sitting around the fire talking. The sun was still out, but it was getting colder as evening fell.

"Do you think they have caught on yet?" Riateh asked.

"By now? Probably," Weir nodded, a wicked grin on her face.

They giggled madly, imagining the expressions on the faces of their men as it slowly dawned on them that they had been set up.

"I almost feel guilty," Kitah admitted.

"Hey! They helped MAKE those kids, it isn't going to kill them to take care of them on their own once in a while!" Logan reminded her.

Kitah laughed. "I did say ALMOST, did I not?"

Though joining in on the laughter, Hope looked around at all of them. "Are you not concerned that they might resort to some form of retribution?" she asked.

They stopped laughing and looked at her, then at each other and started laughing again.

"Believe me, my darling, the men could never carry off such a plan," Teyla assured her.

"Nothing they could actually keep up for very long anyway!" Logan laughed.

"Because you have ways of putting them at your mercy?" she asked.

"Oh yes..." Weir chuckled, blushing furiously.

Suddenly, a creepy feeling stole over Logan. Looking around, she could see that none of the others had noticed it, but...Wait! Teyla suddenly straightened as well. Logan stood up, motioning to Teyla with a slight nod. The two of them walked over to where they had the packs piled together.

"You feel it as well?" Teyla whispered.

"I do," Logan whispered back, careful not to alert the others. "It's not... Wraith...?"

"No," Teyla assured her. "But there is definitely another presence here."

"I agree. We need to get them back to the gate, but I don't want to start a panic, for them or for whoever is watching us."

"Agreed."

They rejoined the others around the campfire. Logan whispered alternately to Riateh and then to Janet that they were being watched, but to continue to behave as if they were unaware of it and to follow along with whatever she and Teyla suggested. Teyla conveyed this message to Weir and to Lyta and Kitah. The group continued laughing and talking as if nothing were amiss. The children sensed that something was up, but all three dutifully followed the example of their mothers without question. Suddenly Logan stood up again and suggested that they all take the girls on a little "nature walk" before it got too dark to see where they were going. They made a big production out of showing the young ones certain plants, rocks and trees as though they had no cares in the world.

They left all of their packs and supplies behind, so as not to arouse the suspicion of whoever was watching them, but both Teyla and Logan were armed, with zats and 9 mil. sidearms, secreted under their jackets. Kitah and Lyta were accomplished enough stick-fighters to be able to hold their own for a little while if they had to. Hope and Chelsea, though small, were also quite adept with the sticks, and there were branches aplenty that they could use as fighting sticks if they needed them.

No one moved to intercept them as they made their way casually in the direction of the stargate, and they thought they were home free when they could see the gate outlined against the setting sun just a few hundred yards away now. But, suddenly, Logan saw movement out of the corner of her eye, off to her right. Someone, or something was definitely watching them. She didn't turn in that direction, though, because she didn't want to alert anyone that she'd seen him, or it. Looking pointedly at Teyla, until she turned and caught her eye, Teyla nodded slightly to acknowledge that she understood. They quickened their pace, ever so slightly, still pointing out interesting objects along the way.

When they were only fifty yards away, the men who'd been watching them suddenly made their presence known, loudly and aggressively. Logan shouted for everyone to run for the gate. Placing Chelsea's hand in Riateh's, she ordered them to run as fast as they could, dial home and not to look back. Weir took hold of Hope's hand, and Kitah already hand Riley by the hand as they all raced at breakneck speed for the gate. Logan and Teyla drew their weapons and dropped back to cover their escape and fight off anyone who came too close to the fleeing party. Kitah was five yards from the DHD when a sudden burst of light and energy exploded up all around them.

ATLANTIS

The men were still commiserating together in the mess hall, including Simmons and Teal'c now, when Sheppard felt a sudden stab of mind-numbing dread course through his body. Mitchell heard him gasp and turned to see him turn as white as a sheet.

"John? What is it?" he asked.

"I... something's wrong..." he whispered.

"Wrong? One of the kids?" Mitchell looked around the table. All the children seemed to be fine. The twins and Alyssia were fast asleep together in a travel crib they'd had brought to the mess hall.

"No... The girls..."

"What?" Caldwell turned to stare at him questioningly.

"I just got a really bad feeling, sir...They're in trouble..."

Caldwell knew the connection he shared with Logan, and their uncanny ability to know instinctively when the other was in danger. He didn't question Sheppard's assertion at all. "Lorne!" he bellowed across the room as he saw him enter with McKay.

"Sir?" Lorne sprinted over immediately, recognizing the tone of his voice and the look in his eye.

"You and McKay, stay with the kids until you can get someone to come and take them to the nursery."

"But..." McKay started to object until he saw the look in Sheppard's eyes.

"Daddy?" Sheppard looked down at Nic and Tommy, who had also sensed something wrong.

"It's okay boys... I want you to stay with Uncle Evan and Uncle Rodney, okay? You follow their orders, alright?"

"Mama?" Tommy asked.

"Mama is fine, son, don't you worry. We just have some work to do right now."

Before they left, Sheppard admonished Lorne and McKay to join them in the control room as soon as the children were taken care of.

UNKNOWN PLANET

"These are strange weapons," Pel said, examining Logans zat gun closely.

"Have a care, Pel. You do not know how it discharges or what it will do," admonished Gin.

Pel placed the zat back on the table with the other things they had taken from the unconscious females. Each of the women wore round metal bands on the fingers of their left hands, each band contained a differing number of bright, clear stones, except for one. There was a strange lettering etched on the underside of that band which neither of them could read. That band had come from the hand of the one who appeared to be the leader of their little group.

They had been delighted to find the women together, and what intrigued them even more, were the three younger females. Offspring, no doubt. These women were fertile. They had produced more females; something their people so desperately needed. Gin realized that, if they had produced offspring, they were no doubt already mated to someone, somewhere, but he didn't care. These women belonged to them now, just like the others they had kidnapped over the past few weeks. Their survival depended upon it.

He surveyed the still unconscious females before him. They were indeed quite lovely - all of them. At this point, it really mattered little to them what the women looked like, as long as they could produce children. The fact that these were all pleasing to the eye? That was merely a happy bonus. The younger ones would not be ready to mate for some time, but once they ripened, they would serve just as well as their mothers.

"I worry about these two," Pel said, pointing to Logan and Teyla.

"They do seem different than the others."

"They carried themselves like warriors out there, Gin. They did not hesitate to protect the others when we made our presence known."

"It matters not, my friend. Even if they are warriors, they cannot fight us, we are too many for them to resist."

"I suppose you are right."

"They will serve us, just like the others, one way or another."

"And this one, this child, she is...I am not sure..." he said, looking down at Hope.

"Her coloring is slightly different, her features. Perhaps she takes after her sire more?" he speculated, looking once again at Teyla. They were pretty sure, based on what they had observed, that she was the mother to her.

"She is older than the other two children, but she is still a ways from becoming ripe yet." Pel said. "Tell me, are you concerned that their men might come looking for them?"

"No more than I was with the others, why?"

"We have never before taken children. Their sires may not take the loss of their offspring so lightly, especially if their world has few women of their own."

Gin studied Pel for a moment. "I had not considered that, I admit, but should they come looking, they will not know where we have taken them. They will spend their time searching the planet where we found them before they realize they are no longer there. They have no way to determine who we are or where the females have been taken. They may even come to believe that the women ran off on their own."

"I hope you are right, my friend."

Gin smiled over at Pel knowingly. "You have already chosen one for yourself, haven't you?" he asked.

"This one," he said, indicating Lyta.

"Really? I would have thought you would choose this one," he said, pointing at Logan.

"She is the one who first caught my eye, this is true. She is breathtaking to behold, but there is a _fire_ in her. I haven't the time or the inclination to tame her, as much as that sounds like... fun. I require someone...softer...more pliant. I am not getting any younger, Gin."

"Hmmm...You do have a point. I, however, wouldn't mind a bit of a challenge. Perhaps I will take this one for myself. She will make comely offspring, from the looks of her."

 **003**

"Anything?" Caldwell barked into his headset.

Sheppard banked the jumper and began searching a new grid. "Nothing," he said through clenched teeth.

"Nothing here, either," Mitchell replied from his seat in the second jumper.

All six jumpers reported the same thing. No sign of any of the women. Their packs and supplies had been found near the springs, but there was no sign of anything beyond that. There weren't even any indications of some sort of struggle. None of them even wanted to consider the possibility of the girls being taken by the Wraith, but it sure looked that way. They could have easily been beamed aboard a dart without any detectable trace left behind. They all knew it, but none of them would make that fear come to life by giving voice to it.

McKay was working on the gate, trying to determine the last address dialed from 003, but he hadn't finished taking apart the components yet, to get to the crystal he needed. In the meantime, the men gathered up the things left behind and loaded them into one of the jumpers.

"We'll find them, sir, no matter how long it takes," Lorne promised Caldwell.

"Thank you Lorne. I know you won't give up."

UNKNOWN PLANET

Logan waited for the two called Gin and Pel to leave before she dared to open her eyes. She'd been conscious the whole time they were discussing the women's fate and what she'd heard had been enough to make her blood boil. What the hell was it with people who thought they could simply TAKE people any time they wanted to?! She had to wonder if these jerks had ever considered ASKING the women they encountered if they were available and willing to take up with them.

When she was absolutely sure they had moved out of earshot, she lifted her head and looked around. Teyla was lying on the ground, next to her. On her other side were Riateh, Weir, Janet, Kitah and Lyta. Panic gripped her as she realized that the children were not there. She sat up, white hot rage washing over her at the thought of anyone, much less these men, putting their hands on the children, especially Chelsea. Teyla suddenly stirred and bolted upright as well.

"Logan?" she whispered.

"Shhhh. They haven't gone far."

"Who are THEY?" she asked.

"Near as I can tell, they're men in desperate need of some women. And I do mean DESPERATE NEED," she emphasized the last two words emphatically.

"Where are the children?" she asked, looking around frantically.

"I don't know..." Logan seethed through clenched teeth. "But you better brace yourself... They plan on allowing the girls to 'ripen' before they use them the way they plan to use us."

Teyla's eyes narrowed and her face hardened with rage. "Never."

"Right there with ya, Teyla. Now we just have to figure out a way to free ourselves and find out where they're hiding the children," Logan nodded.

Teyla shrugged violently and Logan heard something metal fall to the ground beside her. Looking down, she saw the glint of metal and realized they hadn't found all the weapons.

"Excellent," she grinned, leaning over to grab the knife Teyla always had concealed when she went off-world. "Can you rouse the others?"

Teyla began nudging Riateh, who woke with a start. She was quickly hushed and then Teyla whispered for her to wake Weir and so on down the line. By the time Logan had cut her own bonds and then Teyla's all the women had awoken. Logan and Teyla quickly explained the situation and all the women agreed that they had to try and escape.

"I wonder how long we've been out," Weir said.

"Hard to tell. An hour? A day?" Logan shrugged.

"They would have sent out a search party the minute we were late returning home," Weir assured them.

"Yeah... But we aren't on 003 anymore. They moved us after they knocked us out," Logan informed her.

"Rodney will just trace us through the DHD."

"I hope you are right, Elizabeth." Teyla began. "But we cannot wait for a rescue that may come too late."

"Too late?" asked Kitah.

Logan hadn't wanted to scare them, but she knew they had to be prepared to fight, if need be. "They won't wait for us to warm to their advances, ladies. They want 'offspring' and they want them yesterday, if you take my meaning."

"They would... _force_... themselves on us?" Lyta gasped in horror.

"I'm afraid so. Apparently they've been out kidnapping any women they happen to run into for several weeks now, to meet their... needs. There is nothing we can do to change what must have already happened to them, but we can damn well make sure they don't have to endure that anymore!" Logan said grimly.

"What do you want us to do?" Riateh asked.

Logan looked over at her. She could see that Riateh was terrified, but she was doing her best to stay calm. "First order of business... What do we have and what do we need?"

"We have one short-knife," Teyla said.

"We have plenty of wood for sais," said Kitah, pointing at a wood pile in the corner.

"We have you and Teyla. You two are the best weapons we have right now," Weir said.

"She's right. You two have more training than all of us combined," agreed Janet.

"And we'll use it. Listen to me, all of you... I swear to you that I will not let them USE you - ANY of you - not while I'm still breathing."

"You have my promise as well," Teyla assured them.

"Now... what we NEED is to find the children and then find the stargate," Logan began.

Suddenly the tent flap opened and a frightened young woman stepped through. Logan instinctively grabbed and subdued her.

"Please! Do not hurt me!" she pleaded.

Her eyes were full of terror and unspeakable pain. She couldn't have been more than seventeen years old. From her behavior, it was clear to them that she'd already been violated, likely more than once.

"Who are you?" Logan asked.

"I am Dherna. I was brought here a few weeks ago and made to... serve..." she trailed off as tears rolled down her face.

"Janet," Logan called her over.

"Did they hurt you?" Janet asked, checking her over.

"Very much. They will hurt you too...and soon... they are already deciding who is to belong to whom..." she gasped in pain as Janet palpated her lower abdomen.

Lifting the young woman's shirt, Janet was horrified to see the bruises on her body. She had made the mistake of resisting her attacker; someone who clearly didn't like to hear the word 'no.'

"Do you have bruises anywhere else?" Janet asked.

She nodded and raised her skirt just above her thighs. Her thighs were black and blue all the way down to her knees. Her shoulders and back were also heavily bruised.

"You must not fight when they come for you...The others...they will hold you down if..."

"BARBARIANS!" Logan hissed. "Oh we're gonna fight, Dherna. We're gonna fight and we WILL kill them if we have to."

"There are too many," she protested.

"I don't know about your people, sweetie, but WE are warriors. We already have mates, all of us, and we are not about to let those pigs out there have their way with any of us," She took Dherna's face in her hands and made the girl look into her eyes. "And we're not gonna let them hurt you anymore," she promised.

"I...I...wish you COULD fight them," she sobbed.

"We can...and we WILL, I swear it. There were three children, three young girls with us, do you know where they are?" Logan asked.

"They... They are being cared for by the other women, on the other side of the village."

"Are they safe?"

"Yes. the men will not...touch them ... until they are... older..."

"Why are you here? Did they send you here?" Teyla asked.

"Yes. I was to tend to you until you awakened."

"Then what?"

"I was to call them."

"Let's not do that just yet. How many men are there?" Logan asked.

"Many."

"Hundreds? Thousands? What?"

"Oh... No, perhaps one hundred or less."

Weir looked at Logan and shook her head. "Not great odds, but better than hundreds."

"We'll just have to go about this very quietly then. Dherna, where would they have put our weapons? Do you know?"

"I do not, I am sorry."

"Okay... We'll need to at least find the zats. They're quiet and they'll put them down fast."

"Agreed." said Teyla.

Logan pulled Dherna aside once more and looked her right in the eye. "Do you trust me, Dherna?"

The frightened young woman blinked several times before answering. "I'd like to," she admitted.

"What can I say to convince you? No matter what plans we make, they won't work unless you give us your full trust and cooperation. Now, I know they hurt you - in the most God-awful way imaginable, but I swear to you, we **can** fight them and we can set you free."

"How? They are so many, and so strong. We have no weapons and, even if we did... They are just too many...I do not want to be... _punished_...again."

Fresh tears streamed down her face. Logan pulled her close and held her tight, willing strength and comfort to her. "We can do more than you think we can, if we stick together and believe in ourselves. And you...Dherna...YOU are stronger than you know. Look at what you have already survived."

"I...didn't want to..."

"I understand. Dherna, please, you have my word...I WILL get you out of here," Logan swore.

"You speak with such conviction."

"I have four other children and a husband waiting for me to come home to them. I have EVERY reason in the universe to get back to them. Now, we ALL go, or none of us do. Can we count on you?"

The other women watched quietly as Dherna waged an internal struggle between fear and the desire to be free. "I am with you," she said shakily.

"Good girl. You needn't even DO anything to draw attention to yourself. Just tell me exactly where they are holding the children and promise not to give our plans away to the enemy."

"I promise..." she assured her.

Dherna then sketched out a crude layout on the ground of the village and showed her approximately where the children were being held. When Logan had committed the layout to memory, they obliterated the drawing so no one would know what they were up to.

"Okay, so what were you to do when we woke up? What were your instructions?"

"I was to keep you calm and make sure none of you tried to leave."

"And if we did?" Teyla asked.

"I was supposed to scream for help."

"What are they doing right now? I'm really surprised they've left us here alone for so long."

"They have the ring heavily guarded. They are confident that no one will be able to escape from the village, but if they do, they will never make it through the ring."

"How far is the ring from here?" Weir asked.

"The walk is great."

"Great. Stealth is the way to go then. Get the girls and get out before anyone knows we're gone. We have a better chance of making it if we don't have to outrun any pursuers," Logan mused.

"The punishment would be severe, if you..."

"Ah, Dherna, I see you are educating our newest citizens!"

They all turned to find Gin and Pel standing at the tent opening. Logan and Teyla instinctively took up protective positions in front of Weir and the others, careful not to give away their newly formed alliance with Dherna.

"Y...yes, sir..." Dherna squeaked, head down.

"I trust none of them gave you a hard time?" he asked.

"They... have only just awakened, sir... They are still... confused."

Logan silently congratulated Dherna on her quick thinking and willed continued strength her way.

"Who are you?" Logan demanded.

"I..." he leered down at her. "...am your new mate and master..."

Logan inwardly shuddered. "Oh... I don't think so..." she countered.

"You will come to see reason. ALL of you will. Whatever your lives were before, you should forget about that. You belong here now, and you will stay here for the rest of your lives."

"Ne-ver go-ing to hap-pennnn..." Logan drawled out slowly.

"You are a feisty one, aren't you?" he leered again.

"My husband thinks so," she shrugged.

"*I* am your mate now, and the sooner you get used to the idea, the easier it'll be on you."

"Not even when I'm dead," Logan said icily.

Something in her eyes gave him pause and he started looking at the other women standing behind her and the darker woman next to her.

"You speak for all of these women?" he asked.

"I do. Not that I HAVE to, mind you, they are all women who know their own minds. And all of them are already mated, so you're just flat outta luck, Skippy."

"Is that so?"

"It is," Teyla replied.

"Something else you should know, whoever you are... Our mates will not rest until they have found us, and our children," Weir told them.

"They will never find you. They have no way of knowing who we are, where we come from, or where we have taken you."

"Our people are not like others you have encountered," Teyla informed them.

"No? Funny, you look like humans..." he said sarcastically.

"Indeed. But these women... their people are not from around here," Teyla informed him.

"Not from around here? But YOU are?"

"I hail from Athos, as do two others with me. These others, they come from a galaxy very far from here, and they are strong warriors."

"As are our mates," Logan added. "And where we come from, we don't leave our people behind. So you can do the smart thing, and just let us go freely - ALL of us - or... You can wait until our people find us, and they WILL find us, and have them wipe you off the face of this planet."

"Bold words for one so...tiny..." he leered again.

Logan's skin was crawling, but she didn't let it show.

"Dherna!"

"Sssssir?"

"You may go home now, but check on the children first," Pel ordered.

"I...yes...sir..." she kept her head down and left the tent.

"I wouldn't judge me by my size, if I were you...Gin, is it?"

"Oh, I can see the fierceness in your eyes, little one, but I am twice your size and you are no match for my strength."

"Don't bet on it."

"Trust me, little one... When the time comes for me to claim you, I will have no trouble doing so."

"I think I may vomit," Logan hissed.

"For now, though, Pel has come to claim his mate... You there," pointing at Lyta. "What are you called?"

Lyta's eyes flashed angrily and defiantly at him, but she did not speak.

"No one touches any of these women, Gin. No one." Logan said through clenched teeth.

"She is his now. Accept it," he replied dismissively.

"Never!" Lyta yelled. "My mate is the commander of her people. He will lead an armada against your people, the likes of which you have never seen before!"

"Hush!" Janet admonished her, placing an arm around her shoulders to calm her down. It wasn't a good idea to give away information like that.

"The _commander_ , is he? Interesting..."

"Isn't it, though? But if you try taking one step toward her, or any of them, HE will be the last thing you'll have to worry about," Logan warned.

Gin laughed uproariously. He simply could not envision Logan or Teyla as any kind of a threat, no matter how fiercely their eyes spoke.


	83. Chapter 83

"Enough! Pel, claim your mate and be on your way. It seems we are going to have to do things the hard way...which, personally, I find much more satisfying...Send the others in when you leave..."

Pel took one step forward and landed directly in the path of a solid kick turn from Teyla. He gasped in pain as her foot connected with his chest and they all heard the crunch of bones as his ribs cracked with the force of her blow. Pel went down on his back and did not move.

"Pel!"

He turned his head to call out, but Riateh tossed Logan a piece of wood from the pile near her and Logan belted him from behind. He sank to his knees and Logan pushed him all the way to the ground.

"Teyla, get them out of here!"

"What about you?"

"I'll be right behind you. Now take them and GO! Find the children!"

"You will never get away," Gin gasped from the ground.

"Wrong again, Skippy," Logan glared down at him.

He watched helplessly as Teyla reluctantly led the other women out of the tent and Logan stood over him with her block of wood aimed squarely at his greasy head.

"Just you and me now, little one. What say we have a little fun?" he leered.

The creep was actually turned on! Logan made a sour face and felt like vomiting again. "Never!"

Suddenly he lunged at her and knocked her backwards, giving himself time to get to his feet. Logan rolled in a backwards somersault and snapped to her feet. Gin kicked out and knocked the wood from her hand.

"No more weapons, little one."

"Don't be too sure, Skippy!" she snarled.

Before he could even blink, a flash of metal was flying through the air, straight toward his chest. At the last second he put up an arm to deflect it and the blade buried itself deep in the flesh inside of his left arm. He yelped in pain and staggered back a few steps.

Pulling the blade from his flesh, he glared over at her. "Bad idea, little one. I am not adverse to drawing a little blood myself..."

Teyla led the women down through the outer perimeter of the village to the place where Dherna had told them the children were being held. A quick search of the tents soon yielded success. The girls were huddled together at a table in a rear corner of the tent. Two women were watching them, but they didn't seem to be paying much attention to them. Teyla whistled softly, a pre-arranged signal she and Hope had agreed on long ago, should they ever become separated for any reason. Hope's head turned sharply in the direction of the whistle, but she didn't say anything to alert the others.

"What if they scream?" Janet asked.

"We must hope that they will want to be free as much as we do," Teyla shrugged. "Wait here, in the brush, and do not make a sound," she instructed them.

Teyla then cautiously moved forward and managed to wriggle under the edge of the tent, to gain access inside. She was already inside before one of the women noticed her and gasped in shock. Hope immediately jumped up and sprinted toward the two women. She flipped the nearest one onto her back while Teyla approached the other. With Hope's foot on the first woman's throat, the second woman was reluctant to call for help. Chelsea and Riley clung together, but with smiles now on their faces.

"This is my mother, Teyla Emmagen," Hope said.

"I am here to free the children," Teyla whispered. "But we are willing to take you with us, if that is your wish."

"How? You cannot hope to fight those men! They are too many and the ring is too far!"

"If we are stealthy enough, we will not have to fight our way out until we reach the ring. But we must move quickly."

"Just us three? And the children?" she asked, looking down at her friend.

"We are more, and we are determined. If you wish to be free, you must come with us now," Teyla hissed.

"I...WE want to come with you, but..."

"I know you are frightened, but there is no time to argue."

"We will come."

"Very well," she motioned to Hope, who released her prisoner from the ground. "What are your names?"

"I am Kiyana, and this is Revell."

"There are other women being held here against their will, are there not?" Teyla asked.

"Yes, several...You...plan to take them all?"

"We will take any who wish to leave, but we must not alert the men of this village. Do you know where the other women are?"

"Yes..."

The tent flap opened and Dherna walked in, giving all of them a start.

"Dherna!" Teyla hissed.

Dherna blinked in surprise to find her there. "Teyla...You...How did you get away?"

"It was easier than even we believed. Are you ready to go?"

"I...yes..." she looked around. "Where is Logan?"

Chelsea stood up and walked over to them. "Where IS my mother, Teyla?"

"She will join us shortly, she is taking care of another matter. Right now, we must get out of here before we are discovered."

The three women followed Teyla and the children out through the back of the tent where she had come in, and soon joined the other women hiding in the brush. Riley flew into Lyta's arms and hugged her fiercely.

"I was soooo scared, Mama, but I didn't let them see!" she whispered shakily.

"You are so brave, my love. Your father will be very proud of you."

Chelsea looked around, but still didn't see Logan, so she went to Janet and Riateh, allowing both women to hug and comfort her. Hope stuck close to Teyla's side, her eyes darting around looking for any sign of movement.

"Now what?" Weir asked.

"We must head to the far side of the village and wait for Logan," Teyla instructed them.

"We don't leave without her," Riateh reminded her.

"No we don't," Teyla assured her.

"What about the other women?" Revell asked. "You said you would help everyone."

"And we will. We may have to return with reinforcements, if all else fails, but you have our promise that we will free them too."

+++++ GIN'S TENT

Gin lunged again, slashing savagely out at Logan. The tip of the knife caught her in the side and, when she knocked his hand down, her left outer thigh. She hissed as the blade cut into her skin, but she managed to drop down and throw him over her shoulder, using his own momentum against him. Her wounds were not deep, but they were painful. His snide smile as he watched the blood ooze from her and drip down her side only served to heighten her rage. Gathering that rage around her like a cloak, she focused all of it on the sneering, leering barbarian before her.

Suddenly, she drew her hands apart and then swiftly pushed them together in a loud clap. Gin grabbed his head at the exact moment her hands met, though she was a good five feet away from him, he went down as though his head had been caught in a vice - out cold. Logan stood there for a moment, partly to make sure he stayed down, and partly to catch her breath. She was shocked by what she had done, but didn't want to stand there and dwell on it. She noticed, as she looked down at him, that he had something, roughly the size of a zat, tucked into the waistband of his pants. Fighting down a sense of revulsion, she walked over to him and lifted his shirt. The revulsion she felt was well worth it when she saw that it WAS a zat. She quickly retrieved it and cautiously made her way out of the tent and went to find the others.

So far, their luck seemed to be holding, though she wasn't sure how long it would last. As she passed a tent in the center of the village she heard the sound of impatient male voices. They seemed to be arguing over who would get which female, and the discussion was growing more heated by the moment. They were bound to tire of waiting for Gin and Pel and would undoubtedly soon make their way to the tent she had just left on their own.

As she rounded the second to the last tent, she ran smack into two women who were in the middle of a whispered discussion about the men who were arguing over the new arrivals. Logan instinctively raised her weapon at them and hissed for them to be silent. They were so shocked by her sudden appearance, they didn't even question her.

"Listen to me very carefully," she whispered sharply. "My friends and I are getting out of here, and we're more than happy to take you with us. If you want to leave, then you come with me, quickly and quietly. If not, tell me now!"

They exchanged glances and hurriedly nodded their heads. Tears sprang to their eyes as they looked at her. They had the same terrified, pained look in their eyes that Dherna had when she'd seen her.

"My name is Logan. Are there any other women nearby who might want to leave."

"Yes... This tent over here, but she is not alone..." the older of the two sobbed quietly.

"A friend of yours?" Logan asked.

"My daughter. She is only sixteen..."

"Pigs!" Logan spat. "Just one man?"

"Yes..."

"Alright... Stay here, out of sight. I'll get her and I'll be right back. What's her name?"

"Jilea," the woman replied.

The women sank back into the shadows, as they were told, and Logan cautiously approached the flap opening into the tent. Her zat at the ready, she burst through the flap and shot the man standing at the foot of a sleeping pallet on the floor. His shirt was off and he was just in the process of removing his pants when she'd burst in, but the terrified young girl was laying, bruised and naked, on the sleeping pallet. Her bottom lip was bleeding and her right eye was swelling. Her eyes had been closed, so she hadn't seen what suddenly caused her tormentor to fall to the ground next to her. She opened her eyes and looked up at Logan in shock and fear.

"Don't be afraid, Jilea, I've come to get you out of here. Your mother is waiting outside for us... Can you walk?"

The girl nodded, confused and still afraid.

"Don't worry about him... He'll be out for a while. Come... get some clothes on, quickly!"

She helped Jilea to her feet and the girl hastily threw on a robe to cover herself, and stepped into a pair of shoes.

"My mother sent you?" she asked.

"I sort of ran into her. My friends and I are escaping and we're taking you with us. Ready?"

The girl nodded and put her hand in Logan's, squeezing tightly. Logan checked to make sure no one was coming and she led Jilea over to where her mother and the other woman were waiting. Her mother began to sob when she saw her daughter's face, so Logan had to remind them to be quiet, assuring them that there would be plenty of time to express their feelings as soon as they were safe. The four of them hurriedly made their way through the village and soon met up with the others.

Chelsea threw herself into Logan's arms as soon as she saw her, silent tears streaming down her face.

"You okay baby? They didn't hurt you?" Logan quickly checked her over.

"I'm okay... Hope looked out for us."

"Good girl..." she flashed Hope a brilliant smile. "Thank you sweetheart," she whispered. "I see our party has grown some more..."

"And you have brought us more friends as well," Teyla observed.

Logan nodded and put Chelsea's hand in Riateh's, looking pointedly at her friend. Riateh nodded, knowing exactly what Logan wanted.

"Janet? A word, please?" she motioned Janet away from the others and began tearing strips of fabric from her shirt.

"What is it?" Janet asked.

Logan nonchalantly lifted her shirt and showed Janet the angry, bloody wound trailing down her side and leg. Janet gasped, but recovered quickly.

"What happened?"

"He got in one lucky strike... It's not deep and I could try and heal it myself, but..."

"You wouldn't have the strength to fight if we need to fight our way out of here," Janet finished for her.

"Right. Can you just bind it up for me real quick?"

Janet took the fabric strips from her and quickly bound her wounds. When she finished, Logan and Teyla began to lead the others away from the village and towards freedom. She assured the women they had rescued that they would return for anyone left behind as soon as they could muster reinforcements.

It took them forty minutes to reach the clearing where the stargate was located, and they were all tired from the quick pace they had used to put as much distance between themselves and the village as possible. They had been able to keep to the brush and foliage, shielding themselves from detection, should anyone happen to get near. But, the gate was in a large clearing, devoid of any form of cover. It was still dark, but Logan and Teyla had managed to pick out the forms of at least twenty sentries placed around the clearing to guard the gate against any possible escape, or intruders.

"Now what?" Kitah asked breathlessly.

"We have no choice, we're gonna have to take them down if we want to get to the gate."

"There are at least twenty of them, Logan," Riateh reminded her.

Logan glanced over at her and noticed that she looked extremely pale. Something was wrong.

"Yes, but I did manage to get my hands on a zat. Any I miss, Teyla can cover for me. Hopefully we can do this quickly and relatively quietly... Are you alright, Ri?"

Riateh nodded, looking down and smiling reassuringly at an exhausted Chelsea. "I am fine."

"Com'ere..." Logan motioned her away from the others.

Riateh sighed and placed Chelsea's hand in Janet's before following Logan.

"What's wrong?" Logan asked.

"I am fine, I told you..."

"Uh-uh... You're white as a sheet and you look...sick..." Logan informed her.

"We can discuss this when we are safely back home."

"Ri, I know something is wrong, now spill it!"

"I did not want to tell you like this..."

"Did one of those animals hurt you?!" Logan hissed.

"No! No, I promise you, that is not...it..."

"Well?"

"I am...with child..." she murmured quietly.

Logan was torn between glee and concern. "What? You ARE?" she whispered quietly.

"I have not been checked by Doctor Beckett, but, yes... I can tell."

"Does Cam know?" she asked.

"He does not. I wanted to be certain before I told him."

"Okay... Are you cramping or anything? We've come a long way fast..." Logan asked, deeply concerned.

"No...I am just...tired. I...am sorry, Logan."

"For what?" Logan looked at her quizzically.

"I did not want you to find out this way...I knew it might be... awkward..."

"For you or for me? Cause, personally, I'm thrilled for you!" she smiled.

"You...are?"

"Of course! I think it's wonderful. You'll be a fabulous mother, and you already know that Cam is an amazing father. I'm ecstatic for you!"

"That is good to know."

"Now we just have to get you safely back home so Cam can pamper and care for you!" she hugged Riateh fiercely before leading her back to the others.

Within moments, Logan and Teyla had coordinated a plan of action to take the gate area. Janet, Kitah, Lyta or Riateh were to dial the gate as soon as one of them could reach it, but since they didn't have their IDC's with them, they would have to dial the Alpha-site rather than Atlantis. Logan and Teyla would make their way around the outskirts of the clearing, with Logan zatting as many of the sentries as she could to clear a path to the DHD and the gate. Anyone that Logan missed, Teyla would take on hand-to-hand. Their instructions clear, the women gathered together and prepared to make a run for freedom.

 **003**

"I've got it!" McKay called out joyfully.

Caldwell hurried over to his side and radioed the jumpers to return to the gate.

"Get this thing back together, then, and let's move out!" Caldwell ordered him.

Sheppard, Mitchell and Daniel were the first to arrive back at the gate, each of them grim and determined. It was almost more than they could bear, having to wait for McKay to put the DHD components back together so they could dial the address.

 **UNKNOWN PLANET**

Ten down without any of the others being any the wiser. This might just be easier than they had first thought after all, Logan thought. Suddenly, a large, burly man appeared seemingly out of nowhere, directly in her path. How had she missed him? As he made a startled sound, Logan fired her zat and the man went down with a strangled cry.

Dammit! She and Teyla looked around to see if any of the sentries had been close enough to hear him. Two of them had and one sent up a cry of warning before Logan could stop him. No help for it now, they realized. Teyla searched the big man at their feet and found two firearms. Tossing one to Logan she turned and fired at the sentry closest to them. Men began running toward them, all crying out in warning now. Logan was firing with both hands now, the zat in one hand and the firearm in the other.

When it appeared that they had gotten all of the sentries, Teyla signaled to the other women who were still hiding in the brush. They all broke from cover and ran at full speed toward the gate. Hope wanted to stay with her mother, but Teyla shouted at her to take care of the others. Chelsea, too, paused to look back at Logan, but a sharp command in Ancient sent her on her way.

In the distance they could hear more men running in their direction, so Logan called for the women to move faster. She and Teyla covered their six and waited to take out any pursuers who drew near. Logan drew in a sigh of relief as she heard the wormhole engage and called out for them to go.

 **003**

The men were getting frustrated when they couldn't manage to get a lock on the location McKay had retrieved from the DHD.

"Are you SURE you have the right address?!" Sheppard barked.

"Yes!"

"Absolutely sure, or pretty sure?" Caldwell asked.

"I'm positive! It's the only address besides ours that's recently been used."

"Then why can't we get a lock?!" Mitchell shouted.

"I don't know!" McKay hollared in frustration.

"Maybe the gate is already open on the other side. Let's just keep dialing until we get a lock!" Daniel suggested.

"He's right...That could be why," McKay quickly agreed.

Alarms were blaring at the Alpha-Site as Weir and the others sped through the gate. The force-field surrounding the gate area was on, having been activated by the incoming wormhole, so she warned the others as they came through, not to proceed any further until they were cleared by the Alpha-site security.

They had constructed the force-field here because there was no shield device on this particular stargate. The force-field also gave them the opportunity to trap and see who it was that was trying to gain access to this planet, and large enough to trap a Wraith dart, should any come through. They had already trapped two darts, fully intact, which had allowed them to study the craft and gain a fuller understanding of how Wraith technology worked. The darts would also come in handy if they ever needed to mount a mission to a Wraith controlled planet or something.

"Identify yourselves!" ordered Major Addison, the officer in charge.

"Dr. Elizabeth Weir, Major. I'm here with Dr. Simmons, General Caldwell's wife and daughter, Dr. Jackson's wife and daughter, Teal'c and Teyla's daughter, and Colonel Mitchell's... friend. These others are refugees..."

He cut her off at that point, having been fully apprised of their "missing" status. He ordered the force-field turned off and weapons lowered.

"Dr. Weir, what's your situation?"

"We were kidnapped. Colonel Devane and Teyla are still back on the planet where we were being held. I don't know the address, but we need to get word to General Caldwell and have a rescue team sent there immediately."

 **UNKNOWN PLANET**

Logan arched an eyebrow at Teyla as men began streaming out of the brush, running toward their position. "Looks like the whole population of the village," she said grimly.

"Indeed," Teyla took a few calming breaths.

"We can do this," Logan shrugged, trying to sound more confident than she felt.

"Of course," Teyla smiled gamely.

The two women stood back to back and waited for the pursuing men to come into range of their weapons. One by one they were felled, either by zat or firearm as they came into range. Neither Teyla nor Logan spoke as they continued to fire at the determined men. When the firearms ran out of ammunition, Logan continued to fire her zat, while Teyla guarded her six, holding her wooden sticks at the ready.

Some distance away, Logan caught sight of a man... Pel... setting up what looked to be a more sophisticated weapon than the firearms they'd seen thus far. It had to be that thing, whatever it was, that had stunned them all unconscious back on 003, when they were first taken. She couldn't allow them to be taken, so she concentrated her fire on Pel, hoping to incapacitate him before he could use that weapon on herself and Teyla. Just as the device seemed to begin to power up, Logan finally managed to hit him and he went down, sending the device crashing to the ground with him.

 **003**

"FINALLY!" Sheppard shouted as the wormhole finally engaged.

Caldwell ordered the jumpers through first, to cover the men who would be going in on foot. Sheppard and Mitchell accelerated theirs through the event horizon, followed immediately by Caldwell leading the ground personnel. None of them were prepared for what they saw on the other side.

Sheppard gasped as he flew over the clearing and looked down to see Logan and Teyla, sitting back to back on the ground, surrounded by the still forms of at least fifty men lying on the ground. Logan waved weakly as the jumpers flew past and then returned to circle over them. From her vantage point, Teyla saw Caldwell, Daniel and the other members of the rescue team come pouring through the gate.

"The cavalry, I presume?" Logan asked breathlessly.

"Indeed," Teyla replied.

"Not a moment too soon," she snarked.

Still back to back, the women used each other for leverage to get to their feet. They were utterly exhausted, but there was still work to do. They knew there were still men in the village, and they were still holding several women against their will.

"Colonel?" Caldwell approached her at a run.

"Sir," she replied dryly.

"What the hell?!" he began, incredulously looking at all the fallen men. "SITREP, please?"

"Where are the others?" Daniel ran up beside Caldwell.

"They are safe," Teyla replied.

"They're at the Alpha-site, sir, along with some other women we rescued. But there are more being held against their will, back in the village."

They had a million questions, but Caldwell knew it would have to wait until they had full control of the planet.

"How many combatants?" he asked.

"Unsure, sir. It was dark and we weren't able to get a real count. According to one of the girls we rescued there were at least a hundred."

Daniel looked around at all the bodies lying on the ground. "There are at least fifty men here," he estimated.

Logan looked over at him wryly. "Is that all?" she quipped.

Caldwell stifled the urge to laugh out loud. "You two should get back to Atlantis, we'll take over from here."

"Negative, sir. Please. We can show you the way, and we have some unfinished business back there."

Caldwell studied her for a moment, then looked over at the jumpers that were landing about fifteen yards away. Sheppard and Mitchell. He knew they'd want to see Logan for themselves, to know she was really okay. He reached for his radio and keyed the mic. "Get those jumpers back in the air, Colonels, we have some business to attend to."

There was a slight hesitation, then Sheppard replied. "Yes sir," followed by Mitchell.

"The zat all you have?" Caldwell eyed her.

"Yeah."

"Teyla?"

She held up the sticks to show him. Caldwell and Daniel both shook their heads, as the other men's faces lit up with respect and admiration.

"Let's get some weapons over here for the Colonel and Teyla!" Caldwell shouted to Bates.

Bates appeared out of the crowd a moment later, beaming, and presented Logan and Teyla with both a P-90 and a 9 mil. sidearm. Logan winked at him and fell into step with Caldwell.

"Tell me what you can, Colonel."

Logan explained what had happened and why the men had taken them from 003. She filled him in on the other women taken throughout the galaxy and assured him that the men were indeed barbaric, vicious monsters.

"So they'll just do it again if we take the women and leave?" Daniel asked.

"They will, no question."

Caldwell thought for a moment, then keyed his mic again. "Okay people, no zats, no stunners. If they fight, we shoot to kill."


	84. Chapter 84

It was killing Sheppard to see Logan, down on the ground with the others, and not be able to touch or hold her. He couldn't imagine what she had been through, but from the looks of things, all those bodies lying on the ground, he knew it couldn't be good. He was only marginally comforted by the fact that she was on her feet and walking with the others, but he'd feel a lot better if he could hear her voice.

"Colonel Sheppard, Colonel Mitchell, this is Devane," her voice floated through their respective headsets.

'How does she DO that?' Sheppard thought, grinning and shaking his head. Then again, she had always known what he needed and how to ease his fears.

"Sheppard," he replied.

"Mitchell," came his relieved reply.

"Just wanted to let you know that the others are safe at the Alpha-site. Teyla and I are fine too."

"Good to know," Sheppard smiled to himself.

"Thanks for the update," Mitchell replied.

"Any of ours... hurt...?" asked Caldwell as they walked.

"No sir. Those barbarians never had a chance to do anything," she assured him. "The kids were held separately, Sir, with only women watching them."

"Well, that much is good," he grunted, jaw clenched.

"The other women were not so lucky, General," Teyla began. "They had been taken weeks before us and already subjected to... unspeakable things."

"I'm sorry we couldn't do anything to spare them that," Caldwell replied. "But we can keep it from happening again."

"Agreed," Teyla and Logan said in unison.

The jumpers were operating in stealth mode, so the men left in the village did not see them coming, but they had seen the number of troops who had gathered in the clearing. They had come running back to the village to warn the others and gather the remaining women into one defensible position.

Telkor had warned Gin and Pel that there was something different about these women, something that spoke of trouble to him. He'd heard the one woman warn them about her mate, a military commander, and he believed her when she'd said they would come after their women and children. It had been bad enough, had they just taken the women, but to take the children as well? Men who would not fight for their women would most certainly fight for their progeny. But Gin had insisted that they take the children, to ensure the bloodline for future generations.

Now they were paying the price. He had not agreed with Gin and Pel, but he was not about to give up their remaining women without a fight. He was certain that his own, taken more than a month previously, was already with child. It had not been verified yet, but he felt very strongly, given the number of times he had mated with her, or rather FORCED himself on her, that she MUST certainly be with child by now. He would never allow these people to take her from him, not while he still drew breath.

There were still some sixty or so men in the village, and every one of them would fight for their survival, and to hold on to the women they had stolen from their various worlds. They no longer had the incapacitator weapon they'd used in procuring their women, but they had plenty of firearms, and he had figured out how to use one of the ray guns they'd taken off the women who had prompted this invasion. Like Gin, he hadn't thought their people would be able to track them to this planet, at least not so soon, but he knew something bad would be coming eventually. Eventually was here now.

Contact was made with the Alpha-site, to let Weir and the others know that Logan and Teyla were safe. Weir also received orders, through Caldwell, to get everyone back to Atlantis. They were assured that they had plenty of personnel to deal with any remaining combatants.

Between the jumpers and the ground troops, they managed to make quick work of cleaning up all pockets of resistance, with the exception of the twenty or so men guarding the women they were holding prisoner. They could easily blow them sky high, but not without hurting the women inside, and that was not an option.

Every fiber of his being was screaming at him to kill every last one of the pigs hiding behind the women, but Caldwell forced himself to push those feelings down and begin negotiations with the one called Telkor. Neither Logan or Teyla could tell him anything about the man, as they had only dealt with Gin and Pel.

"There will be no negotiations on that point, General Caldwell," Telkor insisted. "We will not fight you if you take your people and leave. But these others, they are not your concern."

Caldwell shook his head and muttered to Logan, out of hearing of Telkor. "I was afraid of that."

"They stole those women because they didn't have any of their own and they wanted to...you know...Preserve their line," Logan rolled her eyes.

"You're not excusing them..." Daniel gasped.

"No! Of course not, Daniel. I'm just explaining why they won't give them up without a fight!"

"Then we have no other choice but to go in with a tactical strike team, but that could mean collateral damage."

"Understood sir," Logan nodded her head sadly.

"Telkor, what you don't seem to understand is that ANYONE held against their will is of concern to us. If you think we're going to turn around and leave those women to your less than tender mercies...You're gravely mistaken," Caldwell called out.

"Then we have a problem, General."

"So it would seem," Caldwell agreed, signaling Bates, Lorne and Ronan to begin leading their strike teams in for the attack.

With surgical precision, Bates, Lorne, Ronan and their teams surrounded, then infiltrated the stronghold. The others watched, listening anxiously as firearms were discharged. They could hear the sound of women screaming between gunfire, and then silence.

"General Caldwell, we have the situation under control," Bates called over the radio.

They all moved in, guns still at the ready. They were relieved to see that all the women, though clearly frightened, remained uninjured. At least by the exchange of gunfire. Logan and Teyla went over to the women, about twelve in all, and began gently comforting them; assuring them that they were all safe now, and that they would receive medical care and then be allowed to return to their homeworlds, if that was what they wanted. Caldwell asked them to lead the women to the jumpers, so they wouldn't have to walk back to the gate for transport back to Atlantis.

Logan took six of them to Sheppard's jumper, stopping to give Sheppard a quick peck before heading back to join Caldwell. Telkor had survived his wounds and was now being interrogated by Caldwell and Daniel. Teyla settled the six women with her into Mitchell's jumper and remained with them for the trip to Atlantis. Sheppard gave one last, longing look at the retreating form of his wife and reluctantly lifted off. He dialed Atlantis and informed them that he was bringing the women through in the jumper and to have Beckett standing by in the jumper bay.

Telkor looked up as Logan took up a position next to Caldwell and glared at him hatefully. This had been _her_ doing. He was sure of it. The moment he saw her, he knew she was trouble. He'd seen the steely determination in her eyes, and the air of authority she exuded was unmistakable. There had been fifteen men arguing over which one of them would get her for a mate. They wanted her for her incredible beauty, totally disregarding the fire in her eyes. He'd known better.

"You take orders from this woman?" he snarked at Caldwell.

Caldwell smirked, recognizing that the man felt completely emasculated by the fact that he and his friends had been bested by a handful of women. True, they were no ordinary women, but still, it had to smart for someone like him to face that. "Actually, she works for me," he grinned in amusement.

He looked down at Logan and winked. "Anything you'd like to say to this...animal...Colonel?"

Logan smiled sweetly up at her commanding officer. "Just one thing..." she admitted.

She stepped forward, looked down at Telkor for a moment, and then hauled off and decked him with one punch. "THAT was for all the women you stole and violated."

Caldwell's men broke out in barely subdued grins as Logan turned smartly on her heel and walked back to stand beside Caldwell again.

"Well said, Colonel."

"Thank you sir. I was going for succinct."

Of the more than one hundred men who had populated the village, only six remained still alive. But the final insult of Logan decking Telkor was too much for them to bear, especially for Telkor. He got back to his knees and then suddenly lunged for Logan, followed quickly by his remaining men. Bates, Ronan and Lorne all fired without hesitation and killed them all. Logan looked dispassionately at the now dead men who had caused so much pain. She felt nothing but contempt for them. They'd had no compassion for their innocent, helpless victims. She had no compassion for them.

"Ready to go home?" Caldwell whispered in her ear.

"Ready, sir."

Caldwell left a contingent in charge of cleaning up and burying the dead and sent everyone else home. He and Logan were the last ones to stand before the gate after the others left. He could feel how tenuous her control was over her emotions, but only because he knew her so well. She had given nothing away while the others were there. He knew she'd need a moment to gather her wits before stepping through the gate and facing her children. As they stood before the open wormhole, Logan suddenly turned and stared back in the direction they had come from.

She took a few deep breaths and fought to keep the tears that were threatening from spilling down her face. She was losing the battle though, and Caldwell knew it. He stepped up behind her and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her back against his chest. At first she startled but then she relaxed against him and gave up the fight. Caldwell held her as her body convulsed with violent sobs. It tore his heart out, knowing what she had gone through. Aside from being threatened herself, she had taken on the responsibility for every single one of the other women who'd been taken. She would have fought to the death to protect them.

"I'm ssssooorry, Sssteve," she choked.

"Shhhhh, sweetheart" he whispered in her ear. "You have nothing to be sorry for. Just let it all go...You're safe here with me..."

It didn't take her long to regain control, so within a matter of minutes, she had dried her tears and readied herself to go home. Caldwell looked her in the eye, knowing she wasn't done yet, but he let it go for now. She was anxious to get back to her family, and they both knew if she didn't get back there soon, Sheppard would come looking for her. Giving her another quick squeeze, he took her by the hand and led her back to the still open wormhole.

"If you need more time..." he began.

But she shook her head vehemently. "No...thanks, Steve. I'm okay now."

He dropped her hand and stepped back. With a sweeping motion, he gallantly motioned her on ahead. "After you," he smiled warmly.

Logan returned his smile and stepped through the gate. A moment later she found herself back home in Atlantis. The first face she saw was Chelsea's, her little body wrapped in Sheppard's arms. She ran toward them, and took her daughter in her arms.

"We were getting worried, Mommy!" Chelsea scolded, her little arms wrapped firmly around Logan's neck.

"Sorry, just had to tie up some loose ends," she pulled back to look at her daughter. "Are you okay? Did Dr. Beckett have a look at you?"

Sheppard took them both in his arms and buried his face in her hair. "Yeah, she's been cleared, but YOU haven't!"

"I'm fine," she protested.

"Uh-huh..." he murmured.

"S.O.P. Mommy, you have to be checked out before you can go home," Chelsea reminded her.

"Smart kid," Sheppard shrugged innocently.

"Alright, alright," she chuckled. "You sure you're okay?"

"Nobody hurt me, Mommy. Hope wouldn't let anything happen to me or Riley. We were just scared."

"I bet you were, but you were so brave, too. Wasn't she Daddy?" she looked up at Sheppard as they walked down the hall.

"Yes, she was, just like her Mommy! I'm so proud of both of you," he beamed.

"John, where are Riateh and the others?" she asked.

"Some are probably still in the infirmary, being checked out."

"Uncle Cam took Riateh to the infirmary," Chelsea informed her.

"Okay...good..." Logan nodded, a slight smile on her face.

There was something about her voice that made Sheppard look at her questioningly. He wouldn't say anything in front of Chelsea, but he could tell Logan was... what? Worried?

Cheers met Logan as she entered the infirmary with Sheppard and Chelsea. Janet, Kitah, Daniel, Riateh, Mitchell and Lyta were all there. Logan blushed and shook her head at them.

"Alright, you crazy lot. You've all had your turn, now let me examine this one. We all know she won't sit still for long!" Beckett teased.

Janet held out her hand and Chelsea ran to her. "You stay with me while Dr. Beckett checks out your Mommy, okay?"

"Okay. I'll be with Aunt Janet, Daddy," she called out.

"Okay sweet-pea," he kissed her and then followed Logan and Beckett to a private exam room.

On the way, they passed several rooms where the women they had rescued were being cared for by Beckett's staff. They all still had that scared, haunted (or hunted?) look in their eyes, but they seemed much calmer. Many flashed Logan a tentative smile as she walked past their rooms. Beckett stopped at the last room at the end of the hall and ushered them inside.

"Go ahead and change into a gown, I'll be back in a few minutes," Beckett told her.

For once, Logan didn't argue with him. She was tired. Exhausted, actually. Her body felt like lead as she tried slipping her shirt over her head. Sheppard gasped as he saw the blood soaked "bandage" Janet had hastily applied.

"Logan... What the _hell_?!"

"Lucky strike... Really babe, it's not as bad as it looks," she yawned.

"If you don't mind, I'll let Beckett tell me that!"

He pulled her shirt all the way off, then her bra, before undoing her pants and pushing them down her legs. He gasped again when he saw the slice on her outer thigh. Logan just looked at him and shrugged silently.

"I thought you said they didn't hurt you?"

"It's nothing compared to what they did to those other women, John. Try to keep that in mind, okay?"

He nodded grimly, then helped her into a gown and lifted her onto the gurney. When she would have sat up, Sheppard insisted she lay back and try to rest. She did so without argument, so Sheppard knew she was more exhausted than she'd been letting on. Beckett soon came back and began to examine and clean her wound. He assured them that her wounds weren't serious enough to warrant stitches, but he did prescribe antibiotics. He gave her a shot and a bottle of oral antibiotics she was to take over the next ten days, just to be sure.

He knew better than to suggest that she remain in the infirmary overnight, but he did request that she remain for a few hours, just to rest, before going back to her quarters and her children. She opened her mouth to protest, but one look at Sheppard made her close her mouth and nod her acquiescence.

Logan finally nodded off for a little while, but woke in time to see Mitchell tiptoe into her room. Sheppard was fast asleep in a chair next to her bed, so Mitchell came around to the other side. He hugged her fiercely and gently kissed the top of her head.

"How're you feeling?"

She smiled warmly up at him. "I'm just a little tired... Maybe a little sore."

"I...uh...Had a nice long talk with Riateh..."

"How's she doing?"

"She's fine, she's fine, thanks to you, and...so is the baby..." he grinned, somewhat bemused.

Logan broke into a brilliant smile. "I'm really happy for you," she whispered.

"She said you were."

"You must be ecstatic," she grinned.

"I am, I am... Once I got past the initial shock, and then worry..." he trailed off and then reached out to take both of her hands in his. "Logan... I really can't thank you enough, you know... For keeping her safe..."

"It's not like it was something I had to THINK about, Cam. I love her, too. Plus... She is a civilian, technically, like Kitah and Lyta."

"I know, I know...I just...I hate to imagine what might have happened to her if you hadn't been there to..."

"Don't think about it, Cam. Teyla and I, we WERE there... I just wish we'd been able to keep everyone from being taken in the first place."

"No one could have done that, sweetie. Speaking of that...Rodney's been analyzing that thing they used to incapacitate you. He's very excited about it."

"I'll bet," she rolled her eyes.

"Who's excited...about what?" Sheppard croaked hoarsely as he stretched.

"It's a Rodney thing, babe," Logan replied.

"Oh... Hey Cam, how's Riateh?"

"She's fine, she's sleeping now," he looked down at Logan questioningly.

Sheppard caught the look they exchanged and was immediately curious. "What?" he asked.

"I haven't had a chance to tell him yet," Logan assured Mitchell.

"Tell me what? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, man, I swear. It's just...Riateh's pregnant!" he beamed.

"What?! That's great!" Sheppard caught Mitchell in a huge bear hug.

"Yeah, I think so," Mitchell agreed.

"So...?" Sheppard arched an eyebrow at him.

"So what?" Mitchell gave him a puzzled stare.

"So...Isn't it about time you made an honest woman out of her?" Sheppard teased.

"You're getting to be as bad as her!" he pointed to Logan.

Logan simply shrugged and looked up at him expectantly. "You know you want to marry her, Cam, why put it off any longer?"

"We're discussing it, alright?" he shook his head.

"Good man," Sheppard said, clapping him on the back.

"Cam... Do you know where the kids are?" Logan asked.

"Janet and Mike have Chelsea, Nic and Tommy and Carter is watching the twins for me until I get back."

"Carter, huh? I'm sure she'd chomping at the bit to have a look at that device Rodney's analyzing."

"Yeah, I better get going. I just wanted to make sure you were okay and give you a kiss for the kids."

"Thanks Cam. Kiss them for me, and Riateh, too."

"You bet!"

Logan looked over at Sheppard when Mitchell left and smiled. "Can we go home now?" she asked plaintively.

"Not until Beckett says it's okay. Why don't you try to sleep some more?"

"Will you go check on the kids?" she asked.

"Only because you'll worry if I don't," he kissed her tenderly. "Promise to stay in bed and behave yourself?" he asked.

She leered seductively up at him. "Come on now, flyboy...You know I RARELY behave myself in bed," she fluttered her eyelashes coquettishly.

Sheppard burst into laughter and had to compose himself before he could leave the room. "Just hold that thought for when you're feeling better, Sparks!" he admonished before kissing her soundly and leaving the room.

SOMETIME LATER

It was dark. Too dark to see where she was going. She could hear Lyta, Kitah and Riateh screaming, but she couldn't figure out where the screams were coming from. She felt as though she'd been running in circles the entire time, but she had no way of knowing for sure, no point of reference. So she ran. She ran at full speed, desperately calling out to her friends, but they never answered; just continued to scream in pain and terror.

Suddenly, she tripped and fell over something lying in the middle of the path before her. A body? She felt around on the ground until she felt hair, and then a face. The hair was long and soft, as was the skin on the unseen face. A woman! She held her breath and explored further. As she dreaded, the woman was wearing a necklace; no... tags! Only one other woman besides herself would be wearing tags.

"Janet?!" she croaked, feeling around desperately for a pulse.

She had none. Logan shook her violently. "Janet! Janet! Come on!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Lyta!" Logan called out and jumped up to continue running. Her heart sank as Lyta's scream faded then died. "Lyta! No, please! LYTA!"

Logan bolted upright in her bed, drenched in sweat and gasping for breath. Someone was holding her wrists, to keep her from hitting out. "No!" she shouted.

"Logan! Logan! Wake up!"

Caldwell's familiar voice brought her back to herself. She stopped struggling with him and looked up into his eyes. He was sitting on the edge of her bed, her wrists still clasped in his large, powerful hands. "Steve?"

"Yeah... It's okay, honey, it was just a dream."

She blinked again and looked around the room. Beckett burst through the door at a full sprint, looking around in confusion.

"What happened? What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," Caldwell replied. "It was just a nightmare," he explained.

"Oh...Okay...You alright now, luv?" he looked at Logan compassionately.

She nodded, unable to speak.

"I'll stay with her Doctor, and I'll call you if she needs anything."

As soon as Beckett left the room, Logan dissolved into tears and collapsed against Caldwell. Clinging to his right arm, and her head resting on his shoulder, the tears poured down her face as she sobbed inconsolably. Caldwell held her silently, knowing there was nothing he could do or say other than what he was doing: Helping her to ride out the storm. He had some idea of what her dream was about, having heard her calling out to Lyta. Despite their earlier conversation, she was still feeling guilty and responsible for what had happened to them. He'd had a feeling she would be. This ordeal had likely stirred up all kinds of bad memories about what had happened to Shannon after their jumper was shot down. She _still_ carried that guilt. When she finally began to calm, he continued to hold her until she was ready to speak.

"I seem to keep falling apart in front of you, don't I?" she sniffed.

"Not a problem. You wanna tell me about it?" he asked, gently stroking her hair.

"I just...I'd never forgive myself if anything happened to them..."

He nodded his understanding. "I heard you call out Lyta's name."

"I would have protected her, I swear to you, Steve..."

He took her face in his hands and looked her right in the eye. "I have no doubt about that whatsoever. And you DID protect her, Lo."

There's something else we need to discuss," she told him, and went on to explain the conversation she'd had with Lyta and Kitah before all hell broke loose.

"Look, I don't know the particulars of your marriage or anything, only you know what... opportunities you have. I just... I think I'm guilty of sometimes forgetting or taking for granted what I have in John and the kids. It's so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day routine and all."

"I see what you're saying," he winced. "And I'll try to be better about picking up on what I might be doing to make her feel insecure."

"Of course you will... You're a wonderful man."

He grinned and made a face. "Oh yeah, I'm a real prince!"

She smiled warmly and leaned forward to kiss him on the cheek. "You are, Steve."

"I appreciate you telling me what was going on."

"I owed it to you, and to Lyta. I want you to be happy."

"Thank you. And thank you again for protecting my wife and daughter through your whole ordeal. I will forever be grateful."

Logan brushed him off. "Thank Teyla, Steve. She protected them as much, or more than I did."

"We HAVE thanked her, Logan," said a soft voice from the doorway. Lyta had just opened the door and was standing in the doorway holding Riley.

"Aunt Logan!" Riley cried, stretching her arms out for Logan.

"Hi Princess!" Logan smiled.

"Easy now," Caldwell warned, taking Riley from Lyta's arms and gently placing her on the bed next to Logan.

"Thank you for saving us, Aunt Logan," Riley beamed up at her and gave her a soft kiss on the cheek.

"Yes. Thank you, Logan. I'm not sure what would have happened if you and Teyla had not protected us."

"You were very brave, Lyta. You should have seen the way she stood up to the leader of those...men..."

"Oh?" Caldwell arched an eyebrow at his wife, who blushed coyly.

"She was incredible."

"Oh stop! Everyone knows that you and Teyla are the real heroes."

"You're too kind," Logan shrugged.

"Not at all. For now, we will leave it at 'thank you' and allow you to get some well-deserved rest."

"See you later, Princess," Logan kissed her namesake affectionately.

"Get some sleep," Caldwell ordered.

"Yes sir," Logan scowled.

"Good night, Logan."

"Good night, Lyta."


	85. Chapter 85

ONE HOUR LATER

Logan woke again, to find Daniel sitting by her side, on her bed, holding her hand. His beautiful blue eyes shone as he smiled down at her in greeting.

"Daniel," she yawned.

"Hey gorgeous," he whispered, leaning down to kiss her on the forehead.

"What... Is something wrong?" she asked, her brows furrowed in sudden concern.

"No, everything's fine... now," he assured her.

"Oh...Okay..." she yawned again.

"I didn't mean to wake you. I just wanted to see for myself that you were okay."

"I'm fine," she assured him.

"I also wanted to thank you..." he began.

"Daniel, you don't have to do that, I was just doing..."

"Don't give me that 'just doing your JOB' spiel, okay? I know you better than that."

"Well it WAS part of my job," she countered.

"Yes... PART. But everyone who knows you, particularly those of us who know you VERY well, knows that you have a tendency to go above and beyond the call of duty," he grinned.

"Are you saying that's a bad thing?" she narrowed her eyes at him.

"Whoa...no way I'm getting drawn back into that argument again, sweetheart. What I AM saying is...Thank you...For protecting my wife."

"Teyla did..."

"I know what Teyla did, and I've already thanked _her_ ; now I'm thanking _you_ , so be gracious and just accept our gratitude," he scolded mildly.

"I...You're welcome..."

"Kitah told me what happened. Both on 003 and after you were all taken."

"What about 003?" She asked.

"She told me about...approaching you...with her...concerns."

"Oh." Logan looked down at her hands.

"I guess I never really thought about how our past relationship might affect her - or even you - down the line."

"You're not alone there, Daniel."

"I'm sorry if she made you uncomfortable."

"It wasn't Kitah, Daniel, it was just...the situation. I'd never really given any thought to it, you know, since you and I had been over for a while before you even met Kitah."

"Still...I guess it's something I should have reassured her about...before...and I'm sorry."

"Really, Daniel, it's okay. We're all still friends."

Yeah," he smiled incredulously. "Go figure..."

"I've always been...proud...of the fact that I could remain friends with you... you know... after we split up. That we could actually behave like..."

"Grown ups?" he finished for her.

"Yeah...I just...You mean the world to me, Daniel. Your family, too. I'm really glad we were able to stay in each other's lives."

"I feel the same way."

"So, you talked, and now Kitah is...okay...?"

"She was actually okay after talking to you, but she just wanted to fill me in on what had happened. She was still feeling a little guilty for coming at you like that."

Logan shrugged. "No harm done. Really."

"She wanted to come and see you, too, but she couldn't tear herself away from the kids."

"Nor should she," Logan said firmly.

"I told her you'd say that," he chuckled.

"Can I offer you one piece of advice?" she asked.

"Sure. I need all the help I can get!"

"Maybe, in the future, we shouldn't be so...demonstrative...about how well we know one another?" she said gingerly.

He thought about it for a moment and then slowly nodded his head. "Becuase that only serves to reinforce any insecurities she might have... I see your point."

"Just a suggestion," she shrugged.

"As long as you don't try to suggest that we end our friendship..."

"Never," she smiled and squeezed his hand.

Sheppard came in, carrying Chelsea in his arms. She was sleepy, but anxious to see her mother. Logan openeed her arms to take her from him and Chelsea quickly climbed under the covers and burrowed against Logan's side.

"Hi Uncle Daniel," she yawned.

"Hi sweet-pea. You come to convince your Mom to get some sleep?"

"Yeah-huh,"

"Good girl..." he went around to the other side of the bed and gently kissed Chelsea on the forhead. "Good night, you two."

"Thanks for stopping by," Logan called out to him.

"Everything okay?" Sheppard whispered to Daniel.

"Oh yeah, everything's fine...Just had to come say thank you."

"Ah...Okay...Give the family our best."

"Will do," Daniel smiled and walked out the door.

Logan looked down at Chelsea and smiled. "Why aren't you sleeping, Cadet?"

"I was...But I had a bad dream..." her eyes clouded over.

"Oh...I see...Those can be pretty scary, huh?"

"Yeah...I..."

"Shhhh, now honey... You can stay with Mommy and Daddy tonight."

Her eyes lit up. "Yeah?"

"Just for tonight, sweet-pea... You had quite a scare, and even though you are absolutely, positively 100 percent safe again, we know it takes a little while to get past a scare like that," Sheppard gave her little hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Are we going home now?" she asked.

"You bet. Dr. Beckett cleared Mommy, so here..." he stretched out his arms to her. "Let Daddy give you a ride, and together we'll walk Mommy back to our quarters."

Chelsea quickly jumped into Sheppard's outstretched arms. "Come on Mommy!" she called.

ONE WEEK LATER

Of the eighteen women they had saved from the kidnappers, nine of them were pregnant, including the youngest, Jilea. All of them were having nightmares and were afraid of being touched, and none of them had requested to go back to their own homeworlds. Out of shame, Dr. Heightmeyer guessed. It hadn't been their fault that they were kidnapped and brutalized, but that wouldn't stop them from feeling shamed.

Logan's heart ached for what they had been through, and what they still had to go through, especially the ones who found themselves pregnant with the children of their rapists. The very young, like Dherna and Jilea would find it hard to deal with. the other seven women were all over the age of twenty five, some were married and had already had a child, or children. Still, what came next would not be easy for any of them.

Sheppard and the other men were outraged over what had been done to these women, and she truly believed that, were they not already all dead, Caldwell would join them in happily beating the living daylights out of every last one of those monsters.

Logan and Teyla spent several days visiting with the refugees in the infirmary, and then in the temporary quarters that had been assigned to them. They assured the women, over and over again that they were indeed safe here, and that no man in their city would ever lay a hand on them. They were less subdued during the time Logan and Teyla visited, but the rest of the time, they pretty much kept to themselves and each other.

The guards assigned to look after them were all female, at Heightmeyer's request, feeling that they might be more at ease around other women during this difficult time in their recovery. Soon enough though, they would have to begin interacting, at least a little, with more of the male personnel, or they might never learn to trust another man again.

Jilea, in particular, developed a strong attachment to Logan, which was easy to understand, given that she had literally saved her in the midst of being brutalized again. Heightmeyer encouraged Logan to form a friendship with the young girl, in the hopes of helping her to heal. Having a mentor like Logan could only be beneficial, as far as she was concerned. Also, Jilea was having a terribly difficult time grasping the reality of her pregnancy, in fact, she refused to believe that she was even pregnant.

Today, Logan brought the twins along with her, when she went to visit Jilea and the others. Of course, the women were enchanted by the precocious twins. Even those who were normally so reserved managed to smile and laugh at their antics. Jilea studied them intently, but did not say much. Logan caught her smiling a few times, when she thought no one was looking.

"They do not look like your other child?" she commented when the other women left.

"You mean Chelsea?"

"Yes."

"Chelsea is the very image of her father. So are Nic and Tommy."

"Little Cadence looks very much like you... But Scott...He does not look like Chelsea or you..."

"He looks like his father," she replied before she really thought about it.

Jilea looked at her strangely. "But..."

"Oh...Sorry...THAT is a very long story. Scotty and Cadence have a different father than Chelsea, Nic and Tommy."

"How is that?"

"Well... The short version is that for a while, it looked like my husband, John, had been killed. We were misled, but we didn't know that for several years..."

"It must have been very...strange...when John came back."

Logan chuckled. "VERY. But it all worked out for the best. We're together again, Cameron - that's the twins' father - has found someone new to love and we're all one big happy family now."

"I wish..."

"What Jilea?"

"I wish I could be happy one day."

"I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but you WILL be, I promise. One day, everything bad that happened to you will seem like a distant, bad dream."

"I wish I could believe that."

"You will...In time," Logan assured her.

"They keep telling me that I am going to have a baby."

"Um-hmmm..."

"I...do not understand...why they keep saying that."

"It's because it's the truth, Jilea. As much as you don't want to hear that, it's the truth."

"I can't have a baby..."

"I know you're scared."

"It would be...a monster..." she began to cry.

Logan took her in her arms. "No sweetie, it wouldn't. It would just be a baby. An innocent little child, like you. A child who had no say in who its father was, one who didn't ask to be born as a result of what that animal did to you. A child who is just as much a victim as you are."

"I don't know how to..."

"Listen to me, Jilea. Whatever happens, you still have time to deal with it. What you don't already know, can be taught."

"I don't _want_ to have a baby."

"I can understand that."

"Can't I make it... go away?" she sobbed.

Logan blinked and looked away. It was not something she would ever do herself, but she was not in the same position as Jilea and the others. Choice was something she believed in wholeheartedly. As much as it gutted her to even think about it, she knew she had to talk to Beckett and Heightmeyer about what Jilea had asked.

"I don't know, sweetie. But right now, I don't want you to worry about it, okay?"

LATER

"I understand where they're coming from, but abortion..." Beckett trailed off sadly.

"I'm not saying we advocate one option over another, Carson, but we have to give THEM the choice, just as we would back on Earth."

"She's right," Heightmeyer said. "They would automatically receive counseling and have all their options laid out to them if this happened back home."

"Doctor Beckett, Doctor Simmons to refugee quarters immediately," the frantic call came blasting over the city-wide.

Janet and Beckett jumped up and sprinted out the door, followed by Logan, Weir and Caldwell. None of them were prepared for the sight that met them when they entered the room. Two of the women were lying on the floor, each in a pool of their own blood. They were deathly pale. Janet went to the first one while Beckett worked on the second one. Over in the far corner, Logan caught sight of a near hysterical Jilea. She had been the one to find them and call for help. Logan went to her and quietly pulled her out of the room.

She knew, long before she heard Beckett call it, that both women were dead. From the looks of it, they had taken their own lives. Driven by grief, shame, or pain - perhaps all three. Jilea confirmed that they had both said they would rather be dead than to give life to the children of the monsters who had violated them. They were too ashamed to go home to their homeworlds, after what happened to them. Both women had husbands and children already, but felt that their families would be better off if they never returned, rather than face the shame of having to deal with what had happened to the women.

They had taken extreme measures to ensure that their families never found out what had happened to them. Logan was, at once, angry and deeply saddened, that these women felt they had no other options. Even the women who were not pregnant, though, had expressed the same feelings of guilt and shame. Logan hoped she would never know the kind of horror that would drive someone to take their own life rather than face what happened and try to move on.

"Is that what I am to face, too?" Jilea cried.

"No!" Logan said firmly. "No! You don't have to resort to that!"

"I do not want to have a baby!" she wailed.

"You don't have to!" Logan assured her.

"What do you mean?"

"Come with me and I'll explain. Let's get the others and I'll explain it to all of you. I don't want any of you feeling like you have no other options."

Together, Logan and Weir gathered the remaining pregnant women, along with Jilea's mother, and explained all of the options open to them. About adoption, about keeping their babies and finally about abortion. They were very careful not to espouse one option over another, but to explain fully what each option entailed. They made sure each of them understood that it was their choice, and their choice alone, which option they wanted to pursue. No one would judge them, or try to convince them otherwise. Making that choice was the first step for all of them in regaining a semblance of independence, of taking back their own lives.

Rather than making any rash decisions, they left the women to think, long and hard, about what it was they wanted to do. Logan and Weir were both shaken by the time they took their leave and went back to work. They ordered security to keep a more careful watch on the remaining women, to ensure that none of the others resorted to drastic measures to end the pain they were going through. They were somewhat certain that none of them would, given the new options that had been laid out for them, but they didn't want to take any more chances.

When Logan went off duty and finally made it back to her quarters, she made sure to cuddle and kiss each one of her children even more than she usually did. She was so grateful for all of them, grateful that her children, surprises though they had been, all of her children were desperately wanted and greatly loved. She was grateful, too, that their fathers were the kind of men they were. Good men, strong, brave, loving and caring. Big, tough, military men who didn't care if their commanders, subordinates or peers saw them acting goofy with their children. Logan knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that she and the childen were lucky to have them - both of them.

Later that night, she lay in Sheppard's arms and cried for the women who had been brutalized and left scarred by the monsters who kidnapped them. She cried for Jilea, who'd had to grow up way too fast because of this. She cried for her own children, and hoped the girls would never, ever have to endure what those women had. She also cried because she felt *bruised* down to her soul over the drastic measures Ordell and Jubah had taken to end their pain. Sheppard just held her, knowing that there were no words he could say that would make her feel better. All he could do, was simply BE there for her, which was, Logan thought, the best thing he could do for her.

Of the remaining seven pregnant women, five of them chose to terminate their pregnancies. Logan was grieved by the prospect, but she understood their feelings on the matter and never said a word to discourage them. Jilea had been the first to undergo the procedure, and she'd requested that Logan remain by her side through the whole thing. Pushing aside her own feelings, Logan dutifully sat by her side, holding her hand throughout the procedure, though Jilea had been completely sedated and asleep.

Over the next few months, and with intensive therapy, all the women began to show signs of recovery. Their nightmares became less frequent, and they gradually began to lose their fear of men. At least the men they regularly came in proximity to. Jilea, most of all, became a totally different person. She began to smile more frequently and more openly, and even to laugh. And, although it completely surprised Logan, she even began to help out in the nursery and daycare facility. She was wonderful with the children. Heightmeyer had been concerned initially, that she was feeling guilty or remorseful about terminating her pregnancy, but even she relaxed after watching Jilea with the children.

One thing they hadn't counted on, however, was Dherna and Jilea developing crushes on two of the men they were frequently coming in contact with as a result of their work with the children: Sheppard and Mitchell. Janet had been the first to notice the way their eyes always lit up whenever one or both of them sauntered into the daycare facility. She pointed it out to Logan and Riateh, but neither of them were terribly concerned. They found it perfectly natural that two young women would find Sheppard and Mitchell attractive - they WERE! - and the girls would never get the slightest bit out of line. In fact, about all they would do when the men came around, was blush a lot and giggle. That, and gaze adoringly at the two handome men. Perfectly harmless. Healthy, too, Logan mused. At least it meant that they COULD feel that way about a man, despite what they had gone through before.

Time moved on. Wounds began to heal. Weir was pregnant again. Mitchell married Riateh in a small, private ceremony, attended by Sheppard, Logan, the children, his parents, and his team: Teal'c, Daniel and Carter, along with their spouses or in Carter's case, McKay. Life was beginning to return to normal, if one could ever call life in the Pegasus galaxy normal.


	86. Chapter 86

SEVEN MONTHS LATER

Atlantis was jubilant, if stunned, as Mitchell and Riateh welcomed twin baby girls to the world. They hadn't told anyone but Logan and Sheppard that they were, again in Mitchell's case, expecting twins. They had declined to know the gender of the babies, so they were as surprised as everyone else. The first thing Logan did, after they were born, was to needle Mitchell a little.

"Now THAT'S karma, baby!" she teased.

"What?" he tried to look innocent, failing miserably.

"That, my dear, is the universe getting back at you for all those hearts you've broken over the years!"

"Me?" he deadpanned.

"Now YOU have to be the father, staying up late and worrying about his daughters..." she taunted him.

"Hey! It's not like I didn't already have Chelsea and Cadence to worry about..."

"Uh-huh...And...HOW many hearts have you left trailing behind you?"

Mitchell thought for a moment then decided to turn the tables on her. "Not anywhere near HALF as many as YOU have!"

"Yeah, right!" she slapped at him playfully.

Sheppard smiled at their good-natured exchange, but his attention was riveted on the two tiny pink bundles asleep in their bassinet. The twins were a perfect even blending of Mitchell and Riateh, and absolutely as beautiful and perfect as his own children. He was struck by a sudden longing for yet another child to add to his brood, though he hadn't really given it much thought before. They already had five children, where had the sudden urge for more come from?

He gazed lovingly over at Logan and wondered if she might deck him for even suggesting they have another child. She already had her hands so full as it was. Normally he would know, without asking, how she felt about...anything...But they hadn't even broached the subject of having any more children, and for the first time in his life, he had no idea how she would feel about something. He was pretty sure he knew, but not absolutely sure, as he'd always been before. The thought sobered him.

He needn't have worried though. Logan looked over at him as he gently reached out and touched the downy soft hair of the twin nearest to him. His crooked smile and look of longing told her exactly what was on his mind. And though it startled her at first, she understood where he was coming from. She wasn't totally opposed to the idea, but it was something they definitely needed to discuss. Thinking about it, she even had to stifle a chuckle. The way they still went at it, she was actually amazed that they hadn't already created another happy accident. All of their children had been happy accidents, or surprises. Not a single one of them had been "planned".

Sheppard sighed and then looked over at Logan again, who caught his gaze and held it. At that moment, he realized that he had been wrong. The unspoken bond they shared, that connection they'd always had was still fully intact. HE knew that SHE knew he wanted another child, and that she wasn't violently opposed to the idea. The twins were only two years old, and they were still quite a handful, so it might be a while before she was ready to take on another infant, but at least she hadn't closed the door on the idea, and that was all he cared about. He had to laugh, inwardly, at himself. Who would have thought that John Sheppard would turn out to be such a family man?

TWO MONTHS LATER

"But... this is a phenomenon that occurs only once in every hundred years!" Carter said emphatically.

"Yeah!" McKay added petulantly.

Weir and Caldwell exchanged weary glances. There would be no dissuading them. The two of them had been like kids at Christmas time when they'd discovered the research in the ancient database. None of them would be around in a hundred years, so they would only get one chance to witness the phenomenon for themselves. They understood this, but what had Weir and Caldwell concerned was the fact that they didn't know EXACTLY what the supposed phenomenon really was, or what it would do. Even the Ancients hadn't managed to record anything concrete about what it "did."

"I'm still not sure it's a good idea for me to have boots on the ground when this...thing...hits," Caldwell sighed.

"I agree. What about just setting up cameras and recording devices?" Weir asked.

"But..." Carter began.

"But..." McKay added.

"Look," Caldwell said. "I understand the appeal...Check that, I understand why this appeals to YOU guys, but I don't think it's worth putting lives in jeopardy just to see, in person, some intergalactic version of the Northern Lights."

"It's more than just some light show, General. We may have stumbled onto a potential new energy source," Carter said.

Weir looked at her skeptically. "How can you know that, Sam? And what's wrong with the energy sources we have now?"

"Between the naquada generators and the ZPM technology, we're pretty much set, so unless you have another, more VALID argument...?" Caldwell looked at them questioningly.

They looked crestfallen, but they had to admit that they didn't have anything more concrete to bolster their argument for observing the phenomenon in person.

"I'm sorry, Doctors. You can set up whatever scientific equipment you want to, but your teams have to be out of there before this thing hits," Weir told them.

They nodded dejectedly and excused themselves from the conference room. They'd known it would be an uphill battle, but at least they'd tried. And, at least they'd be allowed to study the wave, and it's properties and effects via other means, which was, they admitted, better than nothing. They just hoped that, whatever the wave really was, it didn't destroy their equipment when it passed.

"Colonel?" Caldwell looked beyond McKay and Carter at Sheppard.

"Sir?"

"Sorry, but I want you to accompany those scientists and make SURE they get out of there before this phenomenon reaches the planet."

Sheppard winced, but he had a feeling that was what Caldwell would have him do. As brilliant as Carter and McKay were, they didn't always do the prudent thing when it came to scientific research.

"Yes, sir," he mumbled.

"Take Lorne and Ronan with you. They'd be less likely to argue with any of you three," Weir suggested.

"Good idea," Sheppard grinned, excusing himself to track down the men in question.

He bumped into Logan as he made his way down the hall and told her what was going on.

"He's right, John. You know they'd accidentally forget what time it was if they were left out there on their own," Logan nodded.

"I know, I know. But you know how much I hate these kinds of missions."

"You have a short attention span," she teased.

Sheppard leered down at her and winked. "You didn't think so last night," he leaned down and began nibbling on her ear.

She giggled girlishly and put her arms around his waist. "Yes, well... that's about the only thing you don't get bored with easily."

"And I never will," he promised.

"Same here," she winked up at him.

"I love you, Sparks."

"I love you, too, Flyboy."

TWO DAYS LATER - P3R-777

Sheppard checked his watch for what seemed like the millionth time since arriving on P3R-777. Once they'd determined that there were no other life signs detectable on the planet, Sheppard had landed the jumper and helped McKay's team unload what seemed like an entire laboratory of scientific equipment. McKay, Carter and their team were all running around like worker bees buzzing around, chatting excitedly about the mysterious phenomenon.

After about an hour of this, Sheppard and Ronan both felt like they could happily strangle the life out of said scientists. Lorne had been dispatched to continue patrolling the planet while they waited for the science team to finish their work. According to his watch, they were still well ahead of schedule, so Sheppard wasn't worried about that, he was just so incredibly bored. Give him a fire-fight any day of the week over THIS stuff, he thought. A quick glance at Ronan told him that he felt exactly the same way.

After a while, Lorne reported back in, assuring Sheppard that there were absolutely no signs of recent habitation, human or otherwise. With nothing else to do, the men hunkered down and had some lunch while they waited. Inevitably, the discussion turned to past military escapades, with the men all trying to one-up the others with their stories. Having lived with them for so long, Ronan could almost picture what military service had been like for them on Earth. He, himself, had only visited Earth a handful of times over the years, but his visits had been purely civilian in nature.

Ronan still marveled at the peaceful (compared to life with the Wraith) existence the people of Earth enjoyed. They were not as technologically advanced, as a whole, and they still had their petty bickering between certain nations, but at least they didn't live under the constant threat, and considerable shadow of the Wraith. He was convinced that the fact that they did not even know about the existence of such threats is what allowed them to live in such a manner.

They were discussing that very thing when Lorne suddenly looked up and to the right of where they were sitting. He cried out in warning and the others jumped to their feet. Moving fast and, according to his watch, arriving far too early, the distinct "wave" of light was bearing down on them - out of nowhere.

"McKay! Carter! Move!" Sheppard shouted.

Ronan and Lorne ran ahead to help the scientists into the jumper, while Sheppard followed to make sure no one got left behind.

"It wasn't supposed to be here for hours!" Carter shouted as she ran with McKay.

"We'll talk about it later, now MOVE!" Sheppard yelled.

Just as the others reached the first jumper, the wave began to move even more quickly, catching Lorne and Sheppard off-guard.

"Go! Now!" Sheppard ordered McKay, who hesitated lifting off while Sheppard and Lorne were still on the ground.

Ronan was already in the other jumper, but he could not fly it. He toyed with the idea of going back to help them, but there wasn't any point in doing so; they were already running as fast as they could. Unfortunately, it wasn't fast enough to outrun the wave of light. Ronan called out to them just as the wave overtook them and enveloped them in its strange greenish light.

From their vantage point above the planet, Carter and McKay watched in horror as Lorne and Sheppard were engulfed by the wave.

"NO!" they shouted in alarm.

Ronan shook his head and gritted his teeth. He'd followed orders, but he didn't want to have to report back to Atlantis, or to Logan Devane, that he'd lost his superior officer. Someone he respected and admired.

Ronan continued to call out to them the entire time the wave covered them. He couldn't see them, but he refused to believe that they were gone. His faith was rewarded a moment later when the wave passed on by, coming no where near the jumper, and then continued on. To his utter relief, he saw Sheppard and Lorne flung forward after the tail end of the wave went past.

Without hesitation, he sprang from the jumper and sprinted toward the two fallen men. McKay landed his jumper and he and Carter also jumped out and ran toward them. They were all relieved to find that they were still breathing and appeared to be physically unharmed. They were clearly stunned or in shock though, as neither of them moved for a few minutes.

"Sheppard?" McKay asked.

"John?" Carter called out.

"Are you alright?" Ronan chimed in.

Sheppard let out a low groan and rolled over on his side. "Well that sucked," he croaked weakly.

"Are you okay?" Carter asked.

"Peachy," he groaned, opening his eyes. His vision was blurred and unfocused for a moment and he looked like he wasn't quite sure where he was.

"Lorne! You okay, man?" Ronan patted him on the shoulder.

Lorne coughed a few times, then sat bolt upright, looking around suspiciously.

"What the hell was that?" he asked.

"Good question," Sheppard said. "McKay?"

"Uh...Not really sure...yet," McKay sputtered.

"All of our equipment is still intact, so I think we should just grab everything and head back," Carter said.

Sheppard looked at her like he'd never seen her before, but he nodded his head and shakily got to his feet.

"Whoa, there... Maybe you should just go sit in the jumper, both of you, while we pack everything up." Ronan suggested, placing a steadying hand on Sheppard's shoulders.

Sheppard exchanged a confused glance with Lorne and then nodded his acquiescence. Lorne followed suit and sat with Sheppard in the jumper while the others retrieved their equipment. None of the others saw the confused looks exchanged between Sheppard and Lorne whenever they brought back a piece of equipment or just looked in on them to make sure they were okay.

They broke everything down in record time and were soon ready to be on their way. Carter and the scientists went in one jumper, while McKay took over piloting for the still shaken Sheppard.

"Where to now?" he asked.

Ronan glanced at him with a concerned look on his face. "Home."

"Home," Sheppard murmured, arching an eyebrow at Lorne.

"And I have to get ready to answer to a certain Colonel for letting you get caught in that thing..." he winced.

"Better you than me," McKay chuckled, not wanting to face Logan's wrath any more than Ronan did.

HOURS LATER

A couple of hours later, Sheppard was following Ronan as he escorted him to his quarters. Beckett had cleared him, finding nothing physically wrong with him, aside from some slight confusion and possible memory loss. As he opened the door to Sheppard's quarters, Sheppard smiled graciously and thanked him for looking out for him.

"Are you sure you're okay? I can call Mike for you."

Sheppard looked at him oddly for a moment then shrugged. "Nah, really, I'm okay. Nothing a little sleep won't cure."

"Alright, if you're sure... I'd hate to have to answer to the Colonel if something happened to you," he joked.

Sheppard chuckled good naturedly. "Trust me, I'm fine."

"Goodnight Sheppard."

"G'night," he replied as the door slid shut.

Sheppard slowly walked around his quarters, examining everything in great detail. He wondered how much of his memory Beckett thought he'd lost. Couldn't be too much, he thought. He was pretty sure he remembered everything right up until the time he and Lorne got hit by that...whatever it was. He remembered enough to know that something very strange was happening.

A portrait on the wall caught his attention and he stood there, riveted to the image before him, his jaw dropping at the sight. Children. **_His_** children; they'd have to be, he thought, smiling at the wild dark brown hair on the older three. The younger ones, the babies, they had to be twins, but they didn't look like him the way the older ones did. The girl, though... She reminded him of someone... In fact, except for her eyes she looked just like...

He turned around and walked over to the desk. Another family portrait greeted him there. This one had him in the middle surrounded by the children and... he gasped in shock: LOGAN! Reeling, he stumbled over to the sofa, holding the portrait in his shaking hands. It WAS Logan! He blinked several times, thinking he must just be imagining it. The power of suggestion, because he was just thinking that the baby girl in the other portrait looked just like Logan as a baby.

Yet, there she was. In living color. What the hell had happened to him? He sat there, shaken to his very core. Maybe he was still on the planet, still unconscious. Maybe this was all part of some elaborate hallucination his mind had conjured up when he got hit by that wave of light. If he were going to conjure an imaginary world, an imaginary life, Logan would definitley be a part of it. Hell, who was he kidding, she would be at the center of it. He'd given up long ago on trying to pretend that he hadn't been in love with her for most of his life. He'd buried his feelings though. The day he stepped through the Earth stargate and came to this Godforsaken universe.

Oh well, he mused, might as well go and check out the rest of the place; see what else his mind had conjured up for him. He put the portrait back on the desk and walked into the hall. The first room he came to belonged to a little girl, the oldest from the look of it. It was pretty and comfortable and very, very feminine. He wondered where in the world his mind had managed to come up with this! On her bedside table was a portrait of herself and her parents. It looked like it had been taken at Disneyland some years before. Funny, he thought, if he were going to imagine a daughter for he and Logan, he was pretty sure he'd imagine her looking just like Logan, not himself.

He moved on to the next room. This one looked like it was shared by the two boys. Each bedside table had a portrait of themselves, alone with their parents. Made more sense to him that the boys would look like him. He smiled as he looked around the room. Neat quarters, for such little guys. They certainly shared his interests, though, catching sight of the skateboards in the closet and the surfboards stowed under the beds. Then again, he thought, that would be perfectly natural because his subconscious mind would want his boys to enjoy the same things as him.

He moved on to the third room; a nursery. The twins room. Again, he found a portrait of himself, Logan and each one of them separately. He wondered if that was to give the children each their own little piece of their parents, all to themselves. He studied the boys face intently, then glanced over at the girl's. No doubt about it, she looked just like Logan, but the boy... He shook his head. He didn't look at all like Logan, and he sure as hell didn't look like Sheppard. Where in the world would he have come up with that face, cute as it was?

He shrugged and moved on to the last bedroom. His and Logan's, he smiled. In here there were all kinds of pictures, portraits, children's art work. He walked over to a dresser and picked up a framed portrait of himself and Logan. Their wedding portrait. He could easily make out San Francisco in the backdrop. He never would have pictured them getting married there, but he just smiled and went with it. She looked so beautiful, so happy and so full of life in that portrait. He felt a stab of pain when he remembered the awful truth. Logan wasn't alive. She'd been killed in a terrorist attack in Afghanistan right before they were supposed to leave for Atlantis.

He had come anyway, in an effort to put as much distance between himself and the world she no longer inhabited. She'd have wanted him to go anyway, so he did. His final act of love for Logan Devane. Shutting his eyes against the pain, he lay on the bed and hugged the portrait to his chest. He could swear he could smell her scent on the pillow under his head. Even after all this time, he still remembered her scent, her laugh and her voice. He knew it was all an illusion, but he wondered why it hadn't faded once he acknowledged it to be an illusion. A few moments later, he was fast asleep, dreaming about a life he would never have with Logan and their children.

The following morning, Sheppard awoke to find himself still in the middle of his hallucination. As his senses began to awaken, he realized there was an arm draped across his chest, and the scent he recognized as Logan's was no longer coming from the pillow. He opened one eye and glanced beside him. Logan. She was fast asleep, curled up next to him. She had one leg draped over his and her head was nestled against his shoulder. Tempting fate, he dared to lift his hand and brush her hair from her face. God, she was so beautiful!

He stared incredulously at the face he thought he would never see again, save for in his dreams and allowed his hand to move down her arm from her shoulder and back up again. Her skin was as silken smooth as her hair. As he traced his fingertips up and down her arm, she began to stir and let out a long, soft sigh.

"Morning," she murmured softly.

He sucked in his breath as her leg moved down his and her toes wiggled against his. When did he lose his pants, he wondered.

"Morning," he croaked breathlessly, hoping the illusion wouldn't vanish now.

She turned her head and began trailing soft kisses across his bare chest. He closed his eyes and let the pleasing sensation of her lips on his skin carry him away. He groaned as her fingers skimmed over his belly and slowly, very slowly, began inching southward. As her mouth worked it's way up his chest, to his neck, the mood was suddenly shattered by the loud arrival of small children barreling through the door. Before he could open his eyes, two small bodies landed on top of him with a hoot of glee.

"Daddy!" Nic and Tommy called out in unison.

Sheppard whoofed as the younger one crawled across his stomach.

"Morning Mommy, morning Daddy!" Chelsea said, padding softly into their room.

"Nooooo," he groaned softly.

Logan chuckled, whispering in his ear that they could take up where they left off later.

"Promise?" he asked, staring at her as if he still couldn't believe she was real.

"Oh, I promise," she smiled seductively and kissed him lightly on the neck. When she pulled back to look at him, something in his eyes made her pause. "John?"

"Hmmm..." he murmured, unable to take his eyes off of her.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"I...nothing...I just..."

"You're looking at me like you haven't seen me in ages," she teased.

"I...sort of...feel...like I haven't."

"Aren't YOU sweet this morning?" she chuckled.

"I just...I love you, Sparks...I don't think I tell you that, you know, often enough."

"Johnny," she shook her head. "You tell me every day...in soooo many ways. Are you sure you're okay?"

He nodded, reaching out to gently caress her face. "I'm fine...now."

"Daddy, we go surfing?" Tommy asked.

"Surfing...Huh?" he replied, looking at the younger boy.

"You did promise them," Logan reminded him.

"I did?"

"You did..." she looked at him curiously again and reached out to feel his forehead.

"I'm okay," he whispered.

"Are you sure? Carson said you checked out alright, but..."

"No, really... I'm fine."

"You slept awful soundly last night," she eyed him speculatively. "You didn't even budge when we came home," she lowered her voice so the children couldn't hear. "And usually when you fall asleep before I come home, you ALWAYS wake up the minute I start undressing you."

He grinned wickedly at her. "I was wondering what happened to my clothes."

"Still...If you're not feeling up to it, we can always explain to the kids what happened."

"I...no...I don't want to disappoint them...I did promise."

"That you did."

The twins came toddling in and crawled up onto the bed with Chelsea's help.

"Looks like the whole gang is up..." Logan sighed.

"So it seems," Sheppard watched her as she wrangled the twins and hopped out of bed.

She was wearing what had to be one of his t-shirts, as it came down to her knees. How was it possible for her to look so damn sexy wrangling children, no makeup, and hair all sleep mussed? He wasn't sure, but she did.

"Daddy!" Nic called from the bathroom.

"Uh-oh..." Logan cringed. "They're going to have water all over the floor if you're not in there to supervise," she warned.

"I'm on it," he shook his head and threw the covers off.

He was wearing boxers, but for a moment, he was almost embarrassed to be standing there like that in front of the girl who was his oldest daughter. But, she didn't act like seeing him in his boxers was anything unusual, so he just shrugged and went with it.

"Chelsea, honey, would you please go and make sure Nic and Tommy haven't put their towels into the tub...again?"

"Sure mommy," she chirped and darted from the room.

Okay, he thought. Her name was Chelsea. For his grandmother, no doubt. Nice touch. Then there was Nic, short for Nicolas, he guessed, and Tommy. They had named him after his father? This surprised him, since the last time he'd seen his father, the two of them had stopped speaking. Subconsciously he'd always wished that he'd had the opportunity to reconcile with his father, so he guessed he shouldn't be surprised that his mind would conjure up a child with his father's name. He had to remember those names: Chelsea, Nic, Tommy... Now, what were the twins named?

He got his answer when the boy wriggled from his mother's grasp and she called out to him. "Scott, you wait your turn!" she ordered.

"Want bath Nic!" he said petulantly.

Not bad, Sheppard thought, guessing the twins age to be around two years old.

"You can wait and take a bath with Cadence," she said firmly. "Now come help Mommy get breakfast started.

"Okay," Sheppard whispered to himself. "Chelsea, Nic, Tommy, Scott and Cadence..." he repeated the names several times.

Five kids! What the hell was going on in his subconscious that he would conjure up FIVE kids! He thought back to when he first woke up in bed with Logan. Then again, if it had been so hard tearing himself away from her this morning... he grinned lasciviously.

"Atta boy, John... You're a legend in your own mind!" he said to himself.

"Daaaaddddyyyy!" came another cry from the boys.

Ah well, he thought. It was clear now that his hallucinations weren't going to vanish any time soon, so he might as well enjoy himself while he was...here...

After the kids were all dressed and had eaten breakfast, Sheppard heard a knock at the door.

"Uh... I'll get it," he called out.

Logan came out with Scott and Cadence in tow. "I'll get it on my way out," she said, kissing him on the cheek as she passed.

"Out?" he asked.

"Yes, out... I still have to work, you know. I'll drop the twins off at daycare on my way... Are you sure you can handle the three of them at once?"

"I... uh... sure, piece of cake!"

"Okay..." she opened the door to find Lorne standing there.

"Evan," she greeted him with a smile.

His eyes widened at the sight of her. "Ma'am?" he gasped, looking from her to Sheppard.

"Geez Ev, you look like you've seen a ghost or something!" she chuckled. "Don't worry, I wasn't going to ask you to watch the twins!"

"Oh...uh...Yes ma'am." he stammered.

"Looks like you're still feeling as fuzzy as my husband this morning," she noted.

"Uh...a little bit, ma'am."

"Well, I gotta run. Take it easy, and _you_ ," she said walking over to Sheppard. "Keep a close eye on the kids out there," she admonished.

"I will," he promised.

She kissed him lightly on the cheek and wished him a good day before sweeping out the door. Lorne stared at Sheppard, completely confused by now. "Sir?"

"Uh... yeah?"

"What the _hell_ is going on here?" he asked.

Sheppard studied him for a moment before replying. "I have no idea...now..."

"Sir?"

"I thought I might be, I dunno, dreaming or something, but... If you're feeling what I'm feeling, and I really have no reason to dream that, then maybe all this isn't really isn't a dream."

"But, sir...That was Logan Devane..."

"I'm aware of that," Sheppard winced.

"But...she's dead, sir," Lorne reminded him.

"I'm aware of that, too."

"Then how can she be _here_? Married to you? With KIDS?!" he asked. "For that matter, how can WE be here? Atlantis was destroyed years ago when the Wraith attacked."

"Well, Lieutenant, that's a VERY good question."


	87. Chapter 87

Sheppard returned from the mainland tired but happier than he could ever remember being in his entire life. What was happening to him still didn't make any sense, but he was finding himself increasingly more reluctant to question it. He had watched the children, HIS childen, surf like little champions, and beamed with pride the entire time. They were naturals in the water, something they'd inherited from both he and Logan. He knew it wasn't real, but it FELT real, and he wanted to hold onto it for as long as he could.

He'd marveled at how Atlantis had suddenly become a booming metropolis, complete with schools, hell, complete with CHILDREN and civilians. There were a race of people called "Athosians" living on the mainland, people they had apparently rescued from a culling by the Wraith. He had no idea who any of the people there were, aside from Weir, McKay, Zelenka and a handful of other scientists, oh, and Lorne, of course. They all seemed to know him, though, very well in fact.

He'd learned a great deal from the children that day, subtly pumping them for information on the residents inhabiting Atlantis, and he'd been stunned, almost beyond words, when Chelsea mentioned her Uncle Mike. Neither he nor Logan had any siblings, so he thought, at first, that she was talking about some kind of honorary Uncle. But she started reminiscing about meeting Mike and his two sons at Disneyland years earlier, and how weird it was for him to meet the brother he'd never known about. She then went on to tell him how happy she was to have known all of her siblings since birth.

He had a brother? This just kept getting weirder and weirder. He found himself intensely curious about this supposed brother and he'd planned on making it a point to go and look up this Mike Simmons as soon as he had a chance. But before he did that, he smiled to himself, he would make a point of getting Logan alone, and soon.

They stopped off in Logan's office before going back to their quarters, just to let her know they had returned safely. He'd been surprised to learn that she was the head of security for the base, but he supposed that, once the children came along, she'd had to stop going on off-world missions. He smiled to himself and shook his head.

"Look at yourself, John...None of this is real...You're gonna lose your mind completely if you start acting like it IS real!" he muttered to himself.

After dinner that evening, and after the kids were all settled in bed, he finally had a chance to have Logan all to himself. He walked up behind her on the balcony and wrapped his arms around her. She sighed as she let her head fall back against his chest. He held her close, suddenly unsure of what he wanted to say to her. He was still afraid that if he said or did the wrong thing, he'd open his eyes and the whole illusion would vanish. He wasn't ready to let go of the fantasy yet. In fact, he wasn't sure he'd ever be ready.

"What's wrong, John?" she murmured softly.

"Hmmmm?"

"You've been...a little off... What's on your mind, Flyboy?"

"I...was just thinking...I guess..." he stammered.

"About?"

"How fragile life is."

"Because of what happened on 777?"

He shrugged. "That's part of it."

"What's the rest?" she prodded.

"I was thinking about Afghanistan, actually."

She stiffened slightly in his arms, and he held his breath, hoping she wouldn't disappear.

"Your time there or mine?" she asked, though she already knew.

"Yours..."

"That was a long, long time ago, John."

"I'm sorry...I didn't mean to bring up..."

"Hey, it's okay, but I thought we had a deal?"

"Deal?" he blinked.

"Yeah... Remember? We don't dwell on my death or yours," she reminded him.

He nodded, but now he was REALLY confused. "Right."

"After all," she smiled wickedly up at him. "We have so much more fun right here, in the present."

He was instantly aroused as he looked deep into her eyes. With a wink and a smile, he turned her to face him and dipped his head to kiss her lips but was stopped by a sudden call over the radio.

"Colonel Devane to the control room!"

"No rest for the wicked," she sighed. "Raincheck?" she asked.

"I'm...uh...counting on it," he murmured.

Logan kissed him quickly, then ran for the door. Sheppard stood on the balcony and stared out to sea, though he couldn't see the ocean in the dark. No, he thought, he didn't care why he was here; he didn't even care if he had lost his mind and was caught in some never-ending fantasy his mind had created. He never wanted this to end. He'd completely fallen in love with his children and, though he'd have never imagined it possible, he'd come to love Logan more than he ever had before. This was the way his life was supposed to be.

Sheppard was, again, deeply asleep when Logan returned to their quarters. This time, however, he had shed his clothes prior to falling asleep in their bed, so she didn't have to wrestle his clothes and boots off of him. She gingerly tucked the covers around him and bent down to kiss him lightly on the forehead. Studying his handsome face for a few moments while she ran her fingers through his thick, dark hair.

Something was - off - about him. It was obvious that whatever the thing was that had engulfed he and Lorne back on 777, it had scrambled some of his circuits. She'd caught him, more than once, watching her, studying her, with almost a look of disbelief in his eyes. She wondered if that experience had given him more of a scare than he was willing to admit. After all, they'd gone through so much over the years; the supposed deaths, the separations. Perhaps he'd been reminded how close he'd come AGAIN to losing his family. They hadn't really had a chance to talk about it, since they'd been constantly interrupted any time they found themselves alone for more than sixty seconds straight.

More worrisome still, was his fatigue. For someone who was apparently physically uninjured, he sure was dead tired by the end of the day. That wasn't like him at all. She blushed at her own, well, selfishness, when she thought about how he'd always managed to have the strength and energy to make love to her, no matter how tired he was - before. They had never gone without making love, when they were both home in Atlantis. The only time they didn't was when he would be away on a mission. Otherwise, they always came up with some creative way to find the time and the privacy they needed.

She shook her head and kind of chuckled at her own depravity. What?! She couldn't go two days without ravaging the poor man?! After five kids, one might think she would have little, or at least less time, energy or interest in sex, for crying out loud! But, looking at John, she knew her hunger for him would never fade. There was nothing more irresistible than a man who knew you so well, inside and out, down to your very soul. A man who knew instinctively how to please you, and who never failed to deliver.

She was so tempted to wake him, but fought the urge, realizing that he needed to rest. She tiptoed out of the room and went to check on the children, making sure each was in their own bed and snuggly tucked in. She started a load of laundry and straightened up a little around their quarters, trying to burn off some of her own excess...energy...so that she could sleep, too.

The following morning brought new concerns for her though. Mitchell had come over while Sheppard was in the shower. He was to take the twins for a few hours, to visit with Riateh, himself and the new twins. He had spent some time playing with Chelsea, Nic and Tommy while she got the twins ready to go. He was standing in the living room, holding Scotty and talking to Logan when Sheppard emerged from the bedroom, dressed only in a pair of sweatpants.

He was caught off guard by the stranger in his living room, holding the boy he thought of as his, and looking awfully cozy with Logan. A jealousy he'd never known before, deep and raw, tore through his gut and his eyes burned with hostility. Seeing the man there, holding Scotty, he understood now why the boy didn't resemble either himself or Logan. Scotty looked just like the man holding him. Exactly like him. He felt like acid burned in his gut as she laughed at something the man said, as though they were sharing some private joke between them.

"Let me go see what's taking the girls so long," she said, taking Scott from his arms.

When she turned around, she saw Sheppard standing in the hallway, glaring at Mitchell. "There you are," she trailed off at the look in his eyes. "Uh, Scotty, honey, run to Chelsea's room and see what's keeping your sister, okay?"

"K," he dutifully ran off, shouting for Cadence.

"Hey John, how ya doing?" Mitchell greeted him.

Rage coursed through Sheppard's body and mind and he reacted without even thinking. "Peachy," he muttered striding forward and getting right in Mitchell's face. "What the hell are you doing with my wife?" he demanded.

Stunned, Mitchell took a step back and looked at Sheppard in confusion, then over at Logan, who was gaping, wide-eyed and slack-jawed at her husband.

"Don't look at her, look at me!" Sheppard ordered through clenched teeth.

"What the hell's wrong with you?" Mitchell asked incredulously.

"Maybe I don't like other men coming into my home and hitting on my wife!" Sheppard seethed.

"Hitting on... John...What the _hell_?"

Logan shook herself out of the shock and immediately moved to squeeze in between the two men.

"John! What are you DOING?!" she asked.

"Get out of the way, Logan," he ordered.

"I will NOT! Now you stop this - RIGHT NOW!" she pushed against his chest, trying to get him to step back. "What has gotten INTO you? Cameron is your best friend!"

"Best friend..." he muttered darkly.

"Yes! Where the hell do you get off coming at him like that all of a sudden? And HERE of all places, where the children can see and hear?"

That seemed to reach him. "The children..." he murmured.

"It would kill them to see you go after Cam like this!" she whispered harshly.

Sheppard took a few steps back and shook his head before turning away.

Logan turned to Mitchell. "I'm so sorry, Cam..."

"Don't apologize for me!" Sheppard snarled.

"Stop it, John!" she warned. "Cam... He hasn't exactly been himself since 777. I'm REALLY sorry..."

"It's alright, Logan..."

Sheppard whirled around, anger flashed in his eyes as he looked at them, but Logan held up her index finger and glared warningly at him. He glared at them for a moment longer then stalked off to their bedroom and closed the door.

"Whoa..." Mitchell exclaimed. "Maybe you ought to have Beckett check him over again."

"I will. Definitely."

"Has he been that way with you? He hasn't tried to..." Mitchell trailed off warily.

"No! God no, Cam. He...That's the first time I've ever seen him do anything like that. I'm REALLY sorry."

"Lorne's been a little weird, too, since 777. Maybe Beckett missed something."

"Maybe. I just..." she trailed off, at a complete loss.

"Listen, why don't I take all the kids with me while you get him to the good Doc?"

"Oh... Cam, that'd be a bit much for Ri to have to deal with," she shook her head vehemently.

"Then I'll take them to Janet's. Seriously, until you find out what's wrong with him, maybe they shouldn't be around him."

"You're not afraid that he would..." she bit back the rest of what she was going to say.

"No, I know he wouldn't hurt the kids, but if he gets angry again...You don't want them to see that!"

"I...no, I don't," she agreed.

She quickly got the children ready and sent them all off with Mitchell. Once they were gone, she took a deep breath and went to confront her husband.

"What the HELL was THAT?!" Logan growled at him.

Sheppard, though still seething, was a little calmer. When he didnt answer right away, Logan took a few steps toward him and fixed him with an icy stare.

"You know...If I didn't know better, I'd swear that you were... JEALOUS!"

Sheppard's eyes flashed angrily.

Logan gasped in shock. "You ARE jealous!" she cried. "Where the hell did THAT come from?"

He still wouldn't speak, but just stood there, clenching his jaw angrily.

"John... What the hell is WRONG with you? Cameron Mitchell is your best friend, for crying out loud. I thought we'd gotten past all of this garbage!"

Aha! Sheppard thought. Now they were getting somewhere. He merely shrugged.

"John..." she began, but angry tears sprang to her eyes and she paused to get control of herself.

Her tears, or even the threat of them were enough to cool the rage inside of him. The thought of anyone, especially him, causing her any amount of pain was more than he could bear.

"We worked so hard to get past everything that happened after we found out you were still alive. You swore to me that I had nothing to feel guilty about, and you KNOW how hard it was for me to accept that... Tell me it wasn't all a lie?"

"I...it wasn't," he stammered.

"Then why would you get so angry at him? After all this time? Everything has been so great, for us, for the kids, for Cam and Riateh...Please, tell me what's going on with you?"

"I'm sorry, Sparks...I didn't mean to...I guess I'm just really tired. More than I thought I was."

"It's more than that, Flyboy," she murmured softly, reaching up to stroke his hair. "You've been acting a little off ever since you got back. You've never hidden anything from me before... Please, please tell me what's going on with you."

"I don't know, baby... I'm sorry for scaring you."

"I love you, John. You know we can get through anything - together. We always have."

"I love you...so much it hurts sometimes..."

He took her face in his hands and covered her mouth with his own. Logan gasped as his tongue teasingly touched her own, but it wasn't a gasp of pleasure. Something was wrong. Very wrong. _Seriously_ wrong.

"John...Wait..." she whispered, pulling away from him.

He moaned and moved in to kiss her again.

"John...wait...look at me...please."

"Logan," he groaned hoarsely. "Baby, pleeeeease..." he pleaded, covering her mouth with his own.

Logan began to struggle in earnest now. She tore her mouth away from his, taking a deep breath. "John...don't..."

"Logan..."

"No...John...stop now..." she pleaded.

"Oh God...Sparky...baby, I'm sorry...Did I hurt you?" he was clearly mortified.

She stepped out of his reach and crossed the room to put some distance between them. He sat on the bed, staring wide-eyed and dejected at her as she went to her dresser and produced some sort of weapon from her top dresser drawer. Tears slid down her cheeks as she aimed the weapon at him.

"Logan...What are you doing?" he blinked at her.

"Who are you?" she asked tearfully.

"What?"

"Who ARE you?" she demanded again.

"Logan... it's me, it's John..."

"No..." she shook her head negatively.

"Sparky, look, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you..."

"STOP IT!" she screamed.

"I swear to you, Sparks, it's ME!" he protested.

"Then tell me what the HELL is wrong with you!" she demanded.

"What do you mean?"

"Who knows you better than I do?" she asked.

"No one. Look, Sparks... I know I've been a little off my game... And we haven't...you know...made love for...a while, but...I love you! And you KNOW I'd never intentionally hurt you. I'd just as soon cut out my own heart than ever hurt you."

She nodded. "Uh-huh...But I don't recall saying that you did hurt me."

"Then what's the problem? Cause I gotta tell you, you sure have a way of killing the mood when you want to," he said teasingly, pointing at the weapon in her hand.

"Cute," she shrugged.

"Logan, come on."

"Come with me to see Carson," she demanded.

"I don't need to see..."

"Let me make this perfectly clear, John. I'm not ASKING you, I'm TELLING you. We're going to see Carson right now."

He recognized the steely determination in her eyes and the unwavering tone in her voice. "Alright, fine. Whatever you say. But...uh...Are you planning to walk through the city like THAT?" he asked, indicating her robe.

"If I have to," she said evenly.

Sheppard plopped down on the bed and sat on his hands. "Please, Sparks. I'll go wherever you want, I'll do whatever you say, but will you please get some clothes on?"

Satisfied that he would keep his word, Logan quickly ducked behind the door and shrugged into a shirt and pair of jeans, all the while watching him through the partially open door. He sat patiently on the bed and waited for her. If he wasn't John Sheppard, he was certainly doing a first rate impersonation of him. Once she was dressed, she grabbed her headset and radioed Beckett, informing him that she was bringing Sheppard in for more tests.

Several hours later, she and Beckett sat down together to go over the test results he'd ordered. The room they were in was in the middle between Sheppard's exam room and Lorne's, who had been brought in earlier at Logan's request, since he, too had been affected by the light wave and was acting strangely.

"Are you SURE?" she asked.

"Aye, darlin', we ran them three times, just to be sure. There's no doubt about it, Luv. That man in there is definitely your husband, John Sheppard; and THAT man in there is Evan Lorne, no question."

Logan shook her head, then stood up and began to pace.

"What set you off, Luv? What made you think that he wasn't John?" he asked.

"I... can't quite put my finger on it, Carson. I just..." She trailed off when Mitchell came striding into the room.

Up to that point, Sheppard had been perfectly calm and cooperative, but the moment he caught sight of Mitchell in the same room with Logan, his eyes turned cold and hard. He stood up and came over to the window separating the two rooms. He was glaring hatefully at Mitchell, and even Beckett had to admit that it was strange.

"I'll...uh...go in and make sure he doesn't need to be sedated," Beckett said.

"What did he say?" Mitchell asked.

"He confirmed that he IS John..."

"Wait... When did you start thinking he WASN'T?" Mitchell shook his head in confusion

"I...Cam, I told you he hasn't exactly been himself, right?"

"Right."

"He... after you left..."

"He didn't hurt you?!" Mitchell gasped in horror.

"No! No, Cam, he didn't. He just...I don't know. I mean I was already worried that something was wrong and it got even worse when he was...kissing me..." she stammered.

"Well, this can't be the only time in two days that he's kissed you, Lo..."

"I mean REALLY kissed me...Long story, things have been hectic and he's been so tired, we just haven't had a chance to..." she trailed off meaningfully.

"Okay...Now THAT doesn't sound like John, I'll grant you that."

"Beg pardon?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

"Logan, come on..." he grinned wickedly.

"Right," she murmured.

"Anyway...?" he prodded.

"Oh, so anyway...I just got this awful feeling and it kept getting worse and worse. It just didn't *FEEL* like it was John kissing me, if that makes any sense."

"No, no, I understand what you mean. But Carson says it IS him," he shrugged.

"Without a doubt. Lorne, too. Blood tests, DNA tests, all of them."

"Then what does he think is wrong with him?" he asked.

"He doesn't know."

"So now what?"

"I don't know... But until we figure this out, I don't think it's a good idea for the kids to be around him."

Mitchell nodded. "I agree. You want us to take them?"

"Normally I would, but that would be grossly unfair to Riateh. She has enough on her plate right now."

"Well, I insist on taking the twins, at least. You want me to talk to Janet?"

She nodded, smiling gratefully up at him. "Please? Maybe she'll have some ideas about what's wrong with John."

"Okay. I'll be back soon."

Sheppard quickly became less agitated as soon as Mitchell left the room and Logan was alone. Beckett made note of this, and also to have Heightmeyer come in and talk to him. Perhaps some of his memory loss, the full extent was not apparent yet, but perhaps that was part of the reason for his hostility towards Mitchell. Perhaps he had forgotten how they had all gotten past what had happened while Sheppard was presumed dead, and he was reacting now as he had back then. In any case, he hadn't needed to be sedated, and he didn't appear to be a threat, to Logan or anyone else - with the possible exception of Colonel Mitchell, of course. He would not recommend having Sheppard locked up, but he would recommend some type of monitoring for now.

A moment later, Logan came into his room and Beckett excused himself.

"Feel better?" Sheppard teased lightly.

"Not really," Logan replied.

"What?! Come on Sparks, didn't Beckett tell you that I'm... _ME_?!"

"Yes, he did," she nodded, still keeping her distance.

"Then what's the problem?"

She studied his face carefully for a moment before responding. Everything was the same. His eyes, his nose, his mouth, his voice. All of it was Sheppard. "I wish I knew," she said sadly.

"Have I ever lied to you?" he asked.

"No."

"Then what makes you think I would start now?" he sounded hurt now, and it tore at her heart.

"It's more than that, and it isn't necessarily that you're lying, so much as...I dunno...holding something back?"

He nodded sadly and hung his head. "All I can tell you is that I *AM* John Sheppard. I'm the guy you grew up with, the guy who was always there for you, except for..." he trailed off and looked away.

"I told you to let go of what happened in Afghanistan," she reminded him.

"Yes...You did, but how can I? If I had been there..."

"Then you very likely WOULD be dead, just like those five guys who were blown up in that building when they took me. We've been through this, John. You haven't brought that up in years."

His head shot up and he looked at her questioningly. What she'd said didn't make any sense. If all of this weren't an elaborate hallucination on his part, then Logan really would be dead. Having been blown to bits just like the five men who'd been found with her body after that terrorist attack.

"See, now that's the second time you've looked at me like you've seen a ghost. Lorne did that, too."

"Is that why you... freaked out earlier?" he asked.

"Partly."

"What else?"

"When you kissed me," she murmured sadly.

"When I kissed you?" he blinked at her in confusion.

"It felt...different."

"Different... _bad_?"

"Well...Yeah, *I* thought so, or I wouldn't have...freaked out," she admitted.

"You're saying I'm a bad kisser now?!" he muttered, mildly offended.

It was true, he hadn't REALLY kissed her, other than on the cheek or forehead, since they were fourteen or so. When they'd both shared their very first kiss together. After that, no other girl, and then no other woman had made him feel the same way he'd felt when he'd kissed Logan Devane. But still, earlier, in their quarters, he'd sure given it everything he had, everything he felt, when he'd tried to take advantage of the privacy they had make love to her. Children aside, he thought to himself, he'd never actually made love to Logan before, except for in his wildest dreams.

"Hey... Where'd you go?" she asked, waving a hand in front of his face.

"Uh... desperately wishing that this morning's events had turned out drastically different," he grinned sheepishly.

"Uh-huh..."

"You're not going to let this go, are you?" he asked sadly.

"I can't help how I feel."

"What do we do now?" he asked.


	88. Chapter 88

**777 - TWO DAYS EARLIER**

"What do we do now?" Lorne asked.

Sheppard shook his head and took a deep breath as he gazed at their surroundings. "We've covered enough ground to know that we're alone."

"Why would they just leave us here, sir?"

"Maybe they think it isn't safe to return yet," Sheppard replied.

"So we're stranded here until someone decides to come back and check on us," Lorne said, shaking his head.

"Sure looks that way," Sheppard sighed.

"Okay then," Lorne walked away and sat on a rock.

They HAD been there for a long time now. Where the _hell_ was the cavalry? With the gate in orbit around the planet, they had no way of going anywhere, much less home. What was taking them so long to come back for them? Surely they didn't believe that light thing had killed them? No! Logan would never accept that. Not after everything they'd been through the past several years. Mitchell, too, would never accept that they were dead without seeing a body for himself. So...where the HELL were they?

The sudden, distinct sound of an uncloaked jumper sent a wave of relief washing through him. He looked up, trying to see where the jumper was coming from. He waved frantically as he saw it appear over a rise to his left. The jumper banked from side to side, letting him know that they'd been spotted. He whooped and called out to Lorne.

"Alright, Lorne, what say we get the hell outta here?"

Lorne was grinning broadly now. "Yes sir!" he replied enthusiastically.

They ran for the jumper as it set down about twenty yards from their position, but their relief was suddenly cut short, as were their steps when the hatch lowered and a lone figure stepped out to greet them.

"Colonel Sumner?!" Lorne asked incredulously.

"Who else did you think was gonna come pluck your asses off this Godforsaken planet?" Sumner replied.

"I don't understand?" Lorne looked uncertainly at Sheppard, who was staring at Sumner, his face as white as a sheet.

"Understand what? You two wanna come home or what?" Sumner asked impatiently.

Lorne looked questioningly at Sheppard, waiting for his lead, and saw Sheppard shake his head almost imperceptibly.

"Absolutely," Sheppard grinned and headed up the ramp towards him.

Lorne understood immediately what it was Sheppard wanted him to do. He followed Sheppard up the ramp and stood before Sumner waiting for instruction.

"Stackhouse, let's go!" Sumner hollered to the pilot up front.

Sheppard took a seat in back with Lorne, while Sumner went up front to sit in the co-pilot's seat. They had no idea what was going on, but Sheppard felt instinctively that he needed to go along with whatever was happening. Lorne caught his eye and pointed to the name patch on his shoulder, it indicated his name and rank, which might not be such a good idea. He surrepticiously reached up and tore the patch off his jacket and stuffed it into his pocket.

"Where're we headed, sir?" Sheppard asked.

"What the hell did that wave thing do to you guys, Sheppard? I told you, we're going home."

He nodded and looked over at Lorne. "Home would be... good," he murmured.

"Yes it would," Lorne agreed.

Sheppard's mind was racing as he pondered what had happened to them. Sumner... _alive_? How could that be? Between that Wraith Queen and himself, Sumner couldn't possibly be alive. And, even if he were, why would he be so blase about seeing them again? It had been YEARS since that awful day when he'd had to... He shook his head to chase that image from his mind. Still... _something_ weird was definitely going on here. He held his breath as they approached the gate, dialed and then accelerated through the event horizon.

He'd expected to see the Atlantis control room when they emerged from the other side, but this...This was definitely not Atlantis. He and Lorne exchanged another puzzled look, but didn't let on that anything was amiss. They kept their mouths shut and followed Sumner's lead. The jumper set down in cave, well hidden from view of anyone or anything that might be flying overhead. As soon as the hatch opened, Sumner was up, out of his seat and striding down the ramp. Sheppard followed him closely, and then Lorne. They looked around curiously, absolutely sure that they'd never been here before.

"Sheppard, Lorne?"

"Yes sir?" they replied in unison.

"Doc's expecting you... wants to check you over, to make sure that light thing didn't scramble your brains any more than they already were."

"Yes sir," they replied again.

Unsure as to where to go, they stood there for a beat too long.

"What the hell's wrong with you?" Sumner asked irritably. "You guys waiting for an escort or something? Get going!"

"Yes sir," Sheppard said, motioning for Lorne to follow him.

When they were far enough away, Lorne pulled Sheppard aside. "How are we supposed to find Beckett? We don't know our way around this place!"

"How hard could it be? We'll just wander around and hope we run into someone who'll tell us where to go...Or til we run into Beckett himself."

They resumed walking and began taking mental notes of the layout of the place, in case they needed to know in order to make a clean getaway. Before long, they bumped into Weir, who was sitting at a desk in the corner of a room off the main building.

"Dr. Weir," Sheppard greeted amiably.

Weir turned and looked at him curiously. "So, they found you."

"That they did."

"What are you doing in here?" she asked.

It wasn't hard for them to detect a note of hostility in her voice.

"Uh...we were looking for the doc...Have you seen him?"

"Him?"

"Dr. Beckett..."

Weir looked like she'd been slapped. Her eyes turned cold and her expression turned hard as stone. If she'd been slightly standoff-ish before, she was downright hostile now. "That's not funny."

Sheppard paused, unsure of what he'd said to make her so angry.

"Elizabeth..." Sheppard began.

"It's DOCTOR Weir, Major, and I don't appreciate you making jokes about Carson Beckett, to me or anyone else!"

"I wasn't..." he stammered.

"It may be five years since he was killed by the Wraith, but I still take it personally when one of my expedition team members loses their lives!" she shouted before running from the room.

Lorne looked at a stricken Sheppard. "The Doc? Dead?"

"Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore..." Sheppard muttered, shaking his head.

 **ATLANTIS**

"I can't believe you thought the children wouldn't be safe here, with me," Sheppard said dejectedly.

Logan felt a stab of pain shoot through her at the look on his face. "I'm sorry, John. But I don't want to take a chance on them being here if you start to lose it again. Do you?"

"Lose it?"

"If I hadn't stopped you, I'm pretty damn sure you would have started punching Cameron out. Am I wrong?" she asked.

"Oh, _him_..." Sheppard said, clenching his jaw.

"See that? He's not even here and you're hostile at the mere mention of his name. You wanna tell me what that's about?"

Sheppard shrugged and looked away.

"John?"

"I just... I didn't like seeing him, with you, and Scotty."

"Why?" she gasped, completely at a loss.

"Why?!" he gasped in return.

"Yes, WHY? It's not like he was... what did you say? HITTING on me?"

"It _felt_ like he was."

"John, he has a wife he adores and two new babies at home..."

"Then why doesn't he stay with THEM?!" he snarled.

"What? He has a right to see his kids... I can't believe we're even _talking_ about this. We settled this a long time ago. You love Cadence and Scotty every bit as much as I love Tommy!"

That shut him up. The way she'd said that sure made it sound like Tommy was HIS child, but not hers. How could that be? He would never, in a million years, under ANY circumstances cheat on Logan. Never.

"I...know you love Tommy...I just..."

"Just what?" she asked.

"Look, Sparks, I've been a little out of it, and maybe my brains did get a bit scrambled when we got hit by that wave thing...I just..."

"Just what?" she repeated.

"Sometimes it feels as if the past few years...well, as if I'm living it for the first time."

She blinked, studying his face for a moment. She was finally starting to grasp what it was that had first hit her as odd. "Are you saying you don't remember the last few years?"

"No...not really..." he said evasively.

"But you FEEL like you never lived it?"

"Something like that," he admitted.

"So that morning, after you guys were hit by that thing. You were looking at me like you couldn't believe your eyes. The last time you looked at me that way..." she paused, deep in thought.

"Sparks?"

"It was the day I arrived here. You had that same look in your eyes when you first walked in and saw me!"

He just stood there, not sure what to say.

"John... Please, tell me the truth. Do you remember that day?"

"That day?" he stalled.

"The day I arrived here from Earth. The day you learned that I didn't really die in Afghanistan."

His heart was racing. He was beginning to believe that this really wasn't a hallucination after all. He didn't know how or why, but he really was here, in Atlantis, with Logan, and they had a family.

"John?"

"I..."

He had to tell her. Everything. He'd never been able to lie to her before, he couldn't start now.

"John, _please_."

"Before I say anything, Sparks, you have to know - I AM John Sheppard. I swear it on my life, I am John Sheppard."

"Alright. I think Carson established that," she nodded.

"When I told you that it felt like I was living all these things... Mitchell, all that, for the first time...That's exactly how I'm feeling."

"So... You DON'T remember the last few years..." she prodded.

"No...sweetie, I DO remember, that's the problem."

"What do you mean?" she shook her head at him.

"The things I remember... They aren't the things YOU remember."

"What does that mean, John?"

"The things I rememeber, they're VASTLY different than what we're living right now."

"Different how?"

"Atlantis, Sumner, Beckett, you the kids...None of it is the way I remember."

"Spell it out for me, John."

"I don't know these Athosians, this Teyla. I never met them. Sumner is alive, Logan. And Atlantis? Atlantis was destroyed when the Wraith armada attacked. The Daedalus never arrived, at least not while WE were here."

Inwardly, Logan was freaking out. "I see... And me? The children?"

"Up until the other morning, when I woke up to find you sleeping beside me...I believed you were...dead."

She gasped and put a hand over her mouth. "Oh."

"I'm sorry, baby..."

"So, that thing, that wave, it somehow messed with your memories."

"I don't know. What I do know, is that I have never been happier than I was when I woke up next to you. I love our children and I love our life together; it's all I ever wanted."

She nodded. "Me too. "I don't know, John. I mean, is it simply a matter of you losing your memory, or having your memories manipulated by some outside force? We both know THAT can happen..." she trailed off as she realized what she'd just said. "Uh...Well...*I* know that can happen, anyway. Let me ask you something?"

"Of course."

"To your recollection, have you ever met anyone by the name of Athar?"

His face immediately turned red.

"Oh, so you remember HER?" she glared fiercely at him.

"Depends on what you mean when you ask if I met her?" he stammered.

"If I didn't know better, and often times I don't, I'd say she had something to do with this."

"What do you mean? Did you...Have you two met?"

"Yes, John, I've had the displeasure."

"Crap," he murmured to himself. "Okay, why do you think she didn't have something to do with what's happened to me?"

"Last we heard, or saw of Athar, she was being...reprimanded...by the Others - again - for interfering in the lives of humans."

"Which humans?"

"Us."

"Us - you and me, us?"

"Umm...hmmm..."

"What did she do?"

"Other than allowing a Wraith to almost suck the life out of me, or trying to help you Ascend, or futzing with MY memories...?"

Now his face flushed angrily. "She did WHAT?!"

Logan stared at him mutely, getting incresingly concerned about what had happened to him that would affect his memory in such a way. This might be something Athar would do but, she'd been changed back to human form...Hadn't she?

"Sparks?"

"I...uh...never mind. I think we need to have more tests run on you," she told him.

"I thought you believed me, that I am your husband?"

"Not THAT kind of test, Flyboy... We need to talk to Rodney and Sam."

Two hours later they still didn't have any answers for them. Both Sheppard and Lorne had undergone a myriad of tests, especially once it was confirmed that Lorne was suffering from the same type of memory loss as Sheppard. He and Sheppard both shared the same memories from the time they first came to Atlantis up to now, vastly different memories of their lives than the lives they had actually lived.

"It doesn't make any sense," McKay blurted out in frustration.

"You can't find anything?" Logan asked.

"No, nothing," Carter confirmed.

"Okay, maybe not with _them_ , but how much of the data from 777 have you been able to analyze? Maybe there are answers there."

"There's a lot of data, Logan, we haven't even gotten through a third of it yet," Carter informed her.

"Well drop whatever else you're doing and concentrate on analyzing that data. We need some answers!"

They turned to find Caldwell striding into the room.

"Yes sir," Carter replied.

"Can I talk to you?" Caldwell asked.

"Yes sir," Logan replied, folowing him out to the hallway.

Sheppard watched her go with a man he'd never seen before and it immediately set his teeth on edge.

"Lorne?"

"Sir?"

"Do you know who that is, talking to Logan?"

Lorne looked out the window and nodded. "His name is General Caldwell. He was apparently in command of the Daedalus before taking over as military commander here."

"Any idea what happened to Colonel Sumner?" he asked.

"I haven't heard anything."

"Any idea what happened to us?" he quipped.

"I was hoping YOU knew, sir."

"For a while there I thought this was all some elaborate hallucination, and you were part of it, but now..." Sheppard trailed off.

"Doesn't look that way anymore, sir."

"Nope. Lorne... Is it just me, or does that General look awfully friendly with my wife?"

Lorne looked again and shrugged. "Not inappropriately so, sir. But it looks like they know each other pretty well. She seems very relaxed in his company."

"Yes... I noticed that..."

"Didn't take you long to start calling her your *wife* did it, sir?" Lorne smiled.

"My mama didn't raise no fool, Lorne. Never look a gift horse in the mouth!"

"No sir," he chuckled.

Sheppard would have to be crazy not to accept Logan Devane as his wife, Lorne thought. He would never dare say so to his superior officer but, since first meeting her in Antarctica, he'd always thought she was a hot little number. More power to Sheppard if he'd found a way to marry her and STILL keep his commission and station.

 **UNKNOWN PLANET**

Over the next few days, Lorne and Sheppard managed not to alert anyone else that something was very, very wrong. Any lapses on their part could be easily explained away as residual wonkiness as a result of that light wave they'd been caught in. They had managed to ascertain that they were, indeed, still in the Pegasus galaxy, but everyone and everything was completely different than it had been when they left. It was all Sheppard could do to maintain his composure when he determined that Logan was not among the people there. His only consolation lay in the fact that he KNEW she was still alive. She was on Earth, but she was alive.

For a while there, they wondered if they'd been caught in some kind of weird time loop, but that didn't fully explain Sumner's presence. It also didn't explain Weir's open hostility towards him. She behaved as though she hated the sight of him. People were still addressing him as "Major" instead of Colonel. And worse still? Atlantis had apparently been destroyed!

In any case, they figured it might not be a good idea to let the others in on the fact that something was off. They wanted to wait, to see if they could figure out what had caused them to appear here - wherever or WHENEVER here was. When the time was right, he would go to McKay and see if he couldn't figure something out.

All too soon, though, his hopes of dodging Sumner and having to give answers were dashed when he received a summons to his office. He took a deep breath and then began making his way through the once abandoned building they had taken over after abandoning and destroying Atlantis years before. It was all so surreal to him, and it was all he could do to hold himself together. He took another deep breath as he reached Sumner's office, then knocked on the door.

"Come," ordered the familiar raspy voice.

"You wanted to see me, sir?"

"Yes. I was hoping your muddled mind has had a chance to sort everything out. Have you remembered anything yet?"

"No, sir...It's all still...fuzzy."

"Uh-huh...What about Lorne?"

"I just left him, sir. He's having the same problem I am."

"I need the both of you back on active duty. The Genii are acting up again, and we've already got our hands full with the damned Wraith."

"Understood, sir."

"Get in and see the Doc again. Have her give you a full once over, see what she can do about getting you and Lorne back to fighting form."

"Yes sir," Sheppard murmured. "Sir?"

"Yeah?"

"For what it's worth...I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

"For letting you down."

"That's not your fault Sheppard. Yours or Lorne's. Shit happens, especially here. Just do what you can to get back on track."

"Yes, sir."

Sheppard was shaken to his very core by his encounter with Sumner. He'd often wished that he'd had the chance to get to know him better, and he still lived with the guilt of not being able to save him that first day here in Pegasus. He knew, without a doubt, that he'd done the right thing by putting him out of his agony, he'd done what Sumner had silently begged him to, when their eyes met across that room on the hive ship. Whatever had happened, whatever it was that had sent he and Lorne there, it had given him the oportunity he'd always wished for. Problem was, he wasn't sure he could take advantage of it.

He was almost to his quarters when he heard the alert. Without hesitation, he raced back to Sumner's office, and was soon joined by Lorne. It didn't matter where they were right now, they both knew what that alert meant: TROUBLE! And they would be there to help.

"What is it?" Sheppard asked.

"We've detected a ship entering the quadrant."

"A ship? Wraith?"

"It doesn't appear to be."

"Then who?" Sumner asked.

"We're unable to determine, sir."

Sheppard bit his lip in frustration. If they'd had any of the Lantean sensors, they'd already know what kind of ship it was.

"What about radio frequency?"

"Radio? You think it's Genii?" Sumner looked at him questioningly.

"No, sir, the Genii have no ships."

"Right... so why would you think..."

He was cut off by the sudden whooping of McKay.

"Doctor?" Sumner asked.

"He was right!" McKay shouted.

"Who?" Sumner demanded.

"Major Sheppard. As soon as we started scanning radio frequencies we picked it up!"

"Picked WHAT up?" Sumner asked impatiently.

"It's the DAEDALUS, Colonel!" McKay shrieked.

"What?" Sumner gasped. "Open it up!" he ordered.

"This is Colonel Marshall Sumner of the United States Marine Corp, to whom am I speaking?"

"Colonel Sumner? It's good to hear your voice. This is Colonel Steven Caldwell, Commander of the Air Force Battle Cruiser, Daedalus. We've been looking for you for a long, long time."

The room erupted in applause and screams of joy.

"Likewise, Colonel."

"We have you on sensors and will rendezvous with you momentarily." Caldwell informed him.

Sheppard and Lorne exchanged curious glances. They were already treading on unfamiliar territory, now Caldwell had suddenly been thrown into the mix. Perhaps they would have to reveal themselves sooner rather than later anyway.

A moment later, there was a bright flash of light and Caldwell suddenly appeared, along with a contingent of about twenty. Military decorum flew out the window as the newcomers were greeted by the war-weary remaining expedition members. Even the normally staid Caldwell and Sumner managed a wide grin for one another. The two Colonel's greeted one another with a salute and then a quick, yet manly hug and slap on the back.

"Welcome to Pegasus, Colonel Caldwell."

"Thank you, Colonel Sumner, but we've been here before - several times."

"Have you established a base here somewhere?" Sumner asked incredulously.

"No. All of our trips have been strictly recon. We were unable to pinpoint the exact location of the planet Atlantis was on, for some reason, and when we didn't hear from you, we assumed that you must be lacking a power source strong enough to open a wormhole back to Earth."

"That would be an understatement," Sumner muttered.

"At any rate, we never gave up on you. We've been coming back and forth over the years, hoping one day to find you and Atlantis..." he paused and looked around. "This...is not Atlantis...is it?"

"No, it isn't," Sumner said, clenching his jaw.

"What is this place?"

"This is the base of our operations, Colonel, the one we had to establish when we were forced to set off the self-destruct to destroy Atlantis."

"What?!" Caldwell gasped.

"Long, long story...If you'd care to follow me?" he motioned toward where his office was located.

"Of course...Uh..." he looked around the room again. "Major Sheppard?" he called out.

"Here sir," he stepped in front of Caldwell.

"Oh. If you're free for a little while, I believe there is someone on board my ship who'd like to speak with you."

"Oh?"

Caldwell keyed his mic. "Hermiod, please beam Major Sheppard to the location we discussed earlier."

In the blink of an eye, Sheppard found himself in one of the guest quarters on board the Daedalus.

"Johnny?!" he heard the familiar voice call out to him.

"Sparks," he murmured, incredibly relieved that it was her. If there was anyone he could trust with the truth, it was Logan.

She flew into his arms, sobbing and shaking. It was just as if he were reliving her first day on Atlantis, on those years ago. He stood there, holding her against him and breathing in her familiar, intoxicating scent.

When Logan finally released him and took a step back to look up at him, she knew the odd vibe between them hadn't been her imagination.

"Why do I get the feeling that you're not at all surprised to see me?" she asked.

Sheppard reached out and wiped the tears from her face. "You know me too well," he smiled.

"How did you... How could you possibly know..."

"That you weren't killed by that warlord in Afghanistan? That he'd only taken you prisoner because of the medic insignia on your uniform?"

Logan gasped in shock. "Wow... I know we've always been able to read each other, but that's a whole lot of detail - even for us!"

"I need to talk to you, Sparks, and I don't think we have a lot of time."

"Okay," she motioned over to the small bed in the corner of the room.

"Too much has happened for me to tell you everything, so I'm just giving you the bullet."

"Alright, I'm listening."

"Let me start by saying everything that's happening right now...It's not supposed to happen this way," he began.

"You mean now, now?"

"Well, yeah, this... and everything else."

"What do you mean?"

"You've been with the SGC for a long time, so you've seen a lot of weird stuff, right?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Right."

"Anything along the lines of time travel or something weird like that?"

Logan paused thoughtfully. "Well, yeah. That and a lot of other weird stuff I could never tell you about."

"Okay...good. Then this won't sound so off the wall."

"Just tell me, John."

He took a deep breath and began to tell her what he and Lorne had gone through since being engulfed in that wave of light. She listened patiently and quietly, allowing him to get everything out without interruption.

"Tell me you don't think I'm crazy?" he pleaded when he'd finished.

She smiled warmly up at him and leaned over to kiss his cheek. "I believe you."

He breathed a huge sigh of relief and wrapped his arms around her, burying his face in her hair. She reached up and gently ran her hand through his unruly hair.

"So the reason you aren't surprised to see me is that I should have actually come to Pegasus years ago."

"Yep."

"And we've been living here happily all these years."

"Very happily."

"And that's the way it was, up until a couple of days ago."

"Right."

"So now, we both lead off-world teams exploring the galaxy."

"Yeah. Well, *I* do...You've got your hands full with heading up Atlantis security and the kids, of course."

"Whoa, Flyboy...Kids?!" she gawked at him.

"Well, yeah..." he paused hesitantly. He'd forgotten for a moment that she wouldn't remember what he did.

"What kids? Whose kids?"

"Um...Sparks...That might be a bit hard to explain..." he stammered.

"Why...I'm not some kind of intergalactic hoochie, am I?"

"No! No! God, no, Sparks, of course not," he chuckled.

"My husband will be relieved to hear that."

"Yeah, I... What? Husband?" he looked at her, shocked.

"This may sound strange to you, under the circumstances, but didn't you expect me to get married at some point in my life?"

"I...well...sure...Yeah, but...You didn't marry Daniel, did you?"

She chuckled softly and shook her head. "No, John, I didn't marry Daniel, but we are still friends."

"Oh..." Even though he knew the timeline had gone all wonky, it still hit him like a ton of bricks that Logan had married some other man. "Then...who?"

"He's a pilot, so you'll probably get along..."

Before she could say another word, the door slid open. "Hey!"

Sheppard turned and saw Mitchell enter the room. Without thinking he jumped up, grinning broadly. "Cam!" he called out.

Mitchell stopped dead in his tracks. From everything Logan had told him about John Sheppard, he had certainly never expected a warm greeting, much less for him to use his first name. "Hi," he looked to Logan for guidance.

Sensing the sudden tension in the air, Sheppard turned to Logan questioningly. "Sparks?"

"How did you know his name?" she asked.

"How did I...?" he trailed off uncertainly.

"Cam, honey, I have the dubious honor of introducing you to my lifelong friend, John Sheppard."

Mitchell stuck out his hand to shake Sheppard's, who took it numbly, staring at the two of them in shock. He supposed he shouldn't be that surprised, given the wonky timeline and all, but...He was.

"Johnny?" Logan prodded.

"Huh? Oh, right...Cameron Mitchell..."

"Nice to finally meet you. Lo, I just stopped by for a quick hello, Caldwell wants us all down on the planet ASAP."

"Okay, we'll see you down there," Logan gave him a quick kiss and watched him walk out the door.

"Well now, since you already seem to know him, I take it you've met before."

Sheppard nodded numbly. "Yeah...he...uh...He's my best friend."

Logan beamed happily at that news. "I was hoping that'd be the case, but are you telling me that he took MY place in that regard?"

"What? NO! Never."

"Good," she grinned. "So these kids you mentioned...They're mine and Cam's?"

"No..." he murmured without thinking.

"No?!" she gasped.

"Then how many kids are we talking about and WHO is their father?" she prodded curiously.

He looked away uncertainly.

"John?"

"They're uh...Well, there's five..."

"FIVE?!" she gasped.

"Yeah...Two girls and three boys."

"Wow," she blinked. "So? Whose are they?" she prodded.

He'd never been able to lie to her. He couldn't start now. "Uh... ours..." he whispered hoarsely.

"Ours...WHAT?!" her eyes widened as it dawned on her what he had said.

"Yeah," he nodded.

"Ours...as in...OURS? Yours and mine?" she asked.

He nodded.

"Oh...You HAVE to tell me how THAT happened?"

 **ATLANTIS**

"They'll figure it out, John. Between Sam and Rodney and Zelenka..."

He shrugged and looked away for a moment. "Yeah well, I'll have to take your word for that," he murmured.

"You don't sound very confident."

He shrugged again. "The Rodney I remember hasn't been able to do much for us, and I don't even know this Sam Carter. As for Zelenka? As far as I can recall, he was killed shortly after we arrived."

Logan gasped. "God, how awful!"

"What would be the point in scrambling our memories like this?" he asked.

"I don't know, John, but we'll get to the bottom of it. Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"Something I noticed earlier... When Elizabeth came in, you seemed to tense up and you were looking at her like...I dunno, it was as if you couldn't stand her."

He nodded. "You know me too well."

"Why? I mean, what is it you remember about her?" she asked.

"We don't get along."

"Why?"

"When everything went wrong and we had to take over leadership of the mission, she didn't take it well."

Logan stared at him, thoroughly confused. "Okay...Who's WE?"

"Sumner, Lorne, Bates, myself..."

"Sumner?!" she gasped.

"I...yeah...What's wrong?"

"Sumner's dead, John. He was...killed...when you guys first got here."

Sheppard felt like he'd been punched in the gut. "Dead?" he shook his head. "I was wondering what happened. Will you tell me how he died?"

"He was taken, along with Teyla and several others, by the Wraith when you were scouting for a safe place to evac to - when it looked like Atlantis was going to be destroyed by the shield collapsing."

"But, Atlantis rose off the bottom of the ocean when that happened, why would we need to abandon the city?"

"Uh, yes it did, but you didn't know that at the time."

"Oh...Wait a minute...If Teyla's here, why didn't Sumner make it?"

"John..."

"Please, Sparks, just tell me?"

"The Wraith caretaker... She was feeding on him; she was trying to learn the location of Earth."

"God," he shook his head sadly. "So she killed him."

"She took him to the brink, before you got there..." she trailed off.

"What do you mean?"

"She'd taken pretty much everything he had when you got there and started shooting the guards. It was bad, though. You couldn't save him, and he was suffering terribly."

He stood up and walked away. "No! Are you saying that *I* killed him?"

"You had no choice, John. You spared him those last few moments of agony. He begged you to do it."

"He ASKED me to kill him?"

"He couldn't speak, but the way he looked at you, when he nodded his head...John, he was in so much pain and he never would have survived. You did the kindest, most compassionate thing anyone could have done for him."

The pain in his eyes was as fresh and intense as it must have been when it first happened.

"I'm sorry...I shouldn't have..."

"No, don't be. I needed to know...Please," he came over to kneel before her. "Tell me the other stuff?"

"Other stuff?"

"Everything. I want to remember all of it, especially us and our family."

She filled him in on what had happened that first year he was here without her, about how he'd taken over as ranking military officer and how he'd saved Atlantis time and time again. It was as though she were talking about a complete stranger. She described her arrival and how she'd been permanently stationed in Atlantis with him. He asked about Caldwell and she explained that she'd known Caldwell at the SGC, long before they'd come to Pegasus, and that they were actually God-parents to Caldwell's kids.

She smiled broadly as she described for him the events leading up to their mutual declarations of love - romantic love - and how they'd been together, secretly, at first for some time before anyone found out about them. He wanted to know about Chelsea's birth, absolutely sure that he'd been the proudest first-time father in history, but when her eyes took on a brief flicker of a shadow, he knew something had happened to put a damper of some kind on their happiness.

"What? I know I had to be ecstatic when we found out you were pregnant."

"Well, yes and no...Mostly yes."

"What do you mean?"

She went on to explain about how she and Mitchell had been shot through a wormhole that had jumped to another planet as a result of a Genii explosive. A planet without a working gate. At the time, they hadn't known she was pregnant, and it was only after she had been stranded there for a while that she found out.

"I wasn't there when she was born," he knew from the look on her face.

"No. She was three weeks old when you found us."

"Oh God," he croaked.

"That's only one of the reasons you are forever grateful to Cameron Mitchell," she informed him.

He stiffened at the mention of Mitchell's name. "Is that so?"

"John," she said in a warning tone. "He saved our lives. The people on that planet, they had some very...biblical... notions, about everything. If he hadn't agreed to play along, and pretend to be the father of our baby, those people would have stoned me to death - and you would have lost me AND Chelsea."

That tempered the heat coursing through him somewhat. "I suppose I can be grateful for that," he looked over at a photograph of the twins.

"We talked about this, didn't we? How Cam is their father and I'm not Tommy's biological mother?"

He nodded. "Yeah, some..."

"Does it matter now? Cause it didn't before."

"I...It's just..."

"Like you're dealing with it for the first time?"

"Something like that," he buried his face on her lap and she instinctively reached out to stroke his hair, as she always had.

When he looked up, his eyes were filled with pain and it tore her heart out. She took his face in her hands and pulled him towards her. She kissed him gently, tentatively, trying to comfort him.

"I love you so much," he murmured against her mouth.

"John..."

He couldn't help himself. He covered her mouth with his and kissed her passionately. His arms came around her and he pulled her down onto his lap. She was swept away, at first, but then she got that same feeling she had previously. Something didn't feel right. It almost felt as though she were kissing a stranger. It hit her then, that as far as John was concerned, they had never been together before. They had never made love before or shared all the things they had over the years.

"John!" she pulled away from him. "I'm sorry, I...can't..." she disentangled herself from him and looked down at him apologetically.


	89. Chapter 89

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to push," Sheppard murmured.

"No you weren't...You didn't. I just..."

"Can't," he finished for her.

"I'm sorry."

"I know you love me, Sparks, I can see it in your eyes."

"It isn't that, John. It just feels..."

"Different?" he remembered her saying that before.

"You don't remember me, you don't remember US. It's all new to you and it makes me feel like I'm kissing..."

"A stranger," he finished for her again.

"Yes. I'm sorry."

"I get it. I'm not HAPPY about it, but I get it," he frowned.

Suddenly something dawned on Logan that she hadn't considered before. If that were the case, she would kick herself from here to Earth for not thinking of it sooner. Her eyes narrowed and she looked into Sheppard's eyes.

"Logan?"

"John... When you were on 777, did you happen to run across a kind of weird looking mirror?"

"A mirror?" he asked.

"Yes. With a sort of stone frame around it?"

"A mirror... No."

"Are you sure? Think back," she persisted.

"I don't need to think back, hon, my memory is intact from that point on. No mirror with a stone frame or gold leafing; no mirror period. Why?"

A sudden pounding on the door interrupted them and Logan went to answer it. Carter and McKay were practically bouncing off the wall.

"We know what happened!" They announced.

"I thought I did, too, for a minute there..."

"What?" McKay asked.

"Something about a mirror?" Sheppard explained.

Carter nodded excitedly. "Yes!"

Logan shook her head negatively. "He said they never saw one, Sam."

"No, not one of those mirrors - the wave!" she said.

"The wave?"

"Yes. That's what it does, or what it is!" She was so excited.

"And what's that?" Sheppard asked impatiently.

"It's a conduit." McKay said.

"A conduit?" he asked.

"Yes."

"For the purpose of...?" Sheppard prodded.

"Oh, right... Logan will understand this. It's a conduit between two dimensions," McKay shrugged.

"As in?"

"An alternate reality," Logan said.

"Beg pardon?" Sheppard asked.

Carter explained as quickly as she could about the infinite number of realities and timelines, how they worked, according to experiences they'd already had. She filled him in on what had happened to Daniel and how an alternate version of herself and a former Major named Kowalsky had come through to their own reality; and how O'Neill, Daniel and Teal'c had followed them back to theirs to help save *their* Earth from invasion by Apophis. Sheppard listened incredulously as she spoke. Were it not for the look on Logan's face, and the fact that she had asked him about the mirror before they ever got there, he sure as hell wouldn't have believed them.

"So, you're saying that I haven't had my brain scrambled or my memories futzed with?" he asked.

"That's what we're saying. All the blood and DNA tests confirmed that you were John Sheppard because you ARE, in fact, John Sheppard." Carter explained.

Logan sighed heavily and looked up at him. "You're just not _MY_ John Sheppard."

 **NEW LANTEA**

Caldwell stared across the table at Sheppard and Lorne. Sumner, too, was glaring at them.

"That's uh, quite a story, Major," Caldwell finally said.

"Yes it is. It also happens to be the truth," Sheppard replied.

"Well, he's telling the truth about that light wave that hit them anyway. Can't speak to the rest, except to say that they've both been acting strangely since it happened."

"Colonel Devane?" Caldwell arched an eyebrow at her.

"I believe him," she said emphatically.

"Because he's your friend?" Weir asked pointedly.

"That definitely plays a part in it. I've known John Sheppard all my life..."

"With the exception of the past several years and, with all due respect," Weir began, without the slightest hint of respect in her voice, "You have no idea what we've been subjected to during our time here. Especially the Major here."

"That may be true, but it still wouldn't change who he is, at his core. And you, Dr. Weir, know as well as I do that there are incidents of this very thing having happened before."

Weir stared at her, without answering.

"The Colonel is right. I was there when the same thing happened to Dr. Jackson, and when alternate versions of Colonel Carter and Major Kowalsky appeared in ours," Caldwell shrugged.

"Those incidents were facilitated by the use of those Quantum mirrors," Weir reminded them. "Major, did YOU see any mirrors on that planet?"

Sheppard leveled his gaze on her and whispered out of the side of his mouth. "You know, you're much more likeable in MY reality."

"Major?" Sumner prodded.

"No sir, no mirrors, quantum or otherwise. Oh, and sirs?"

"Yes?" they replied together.

"Where I come from it's actually Colonel Sheppard," he shrugged. "Just saying."

Logan bit her lip to keep from smiling. "Couldn't the jump have been caused by something else? Something in that wave?"

McKay shrugged. "It's possible."

"Is it likely?" Caldwell asked.

"If he's telling the truth, then, yes, it could be likely."

"So, if we go on the assumption that it is likely and it did happen, what do we do to fix it?" Caldwell asked.

"I don't know."

"You don't know?! Well _figure_ it out, Rodney! It's what you _do_!" Sheppard barked.

"First of all, we don't know anything about that wave, it took us completely by surprise. Secondly, if it WAS the wave, it's gone now, so we CAN'T send them back."

"Listen to me Rodney, none of this making dire predictions only to pull off a heroic solution at the last minute. Figure it out and send us back!" Sheppard growled.

McKay looked at him like he was crazy. "I'm not kidding, Major... Er...Colonel. We have no data on this thing whatsoever, we weren't there to study it, and even if we were, we don't have the equipment we would have needed in the first place!"

"But, you..." Sheppard trailed off.

"Most of our equipment went down with Atlantis, Sheppard," Sumner informed him.

"There has to be a way," Logan jumped in. "You have the Daedalus' equipment now. Can't you use that?"

"Did no one hear me say that the wave is GONE?!" McKay barked.

 **ATLANTIS**

"No offense, Dr. McKay, but, even if you could find a way to send us back to our own reality, what makes you think we'd even WANT to go back?"

McKay stared at him blankly. "Huh?"

"Seriously, Doc...From what I've seen so far, our lives are WAAAY better here than they were back there. Why would we want to leave all this?" Lorne asked.

"Lorne... _Because_!" McKay continued staring at him.

"Because," Carter broke in. "OUR Lorne and Sheppard have lives here. In Colonel Sheppard's case, he has a wife and family he treasures. Are you really suggesting that we leave them in YOUR reality?"

Lorne shrugged, only mildly ashamed. "I'm sorry about that, but... You don't understand how bad it's been. Cut off from Earth, losing Atlantis the way we did. We don't have the technology you do, or the supplies. We're using Genii weapons, cause we ran out of ammunition for our own, and...I had a look in the lab earlier today; you've got ZPM's coming out of your ears! Where did you FIND them?"

Carter looked at him sheepishly. She COULD understand his point of view, just as she had her own alternate self's view when she met her.

"We...uh...made them."

"You MADE them?" Lorne gasped. "How?"

"Well that's very complicated and highly technical. Suffice it to say, with everything we had in the Ancient database, and a lot of help from the Asgard..."

"The Asgard?" Lorne asked incredulously. "They're helping us now?"

"Yes, Lieutenant, they are."

"Now SEE? That's what I'm talking about! Why would we want to go back there, when we have all of this HERE?"

"Because this isn't where you belong. It might be different, if our Sheppard and Lorne were no longer here, as was the case for Daniel Jackson when he traveled to an alternate reality himself. The lives you assumed when you were sent here don't belong to you," Carter said.

"And what about Colonel Devane and her children? Don't you think they deserve to have THEIR John Sheppard back? Your Sheppard doesn't know them, he doesn't..." McKay trailed off.

"He loves her, too, Doctor. Always has. It nearly killed him when our Logan Devane died in that bombing in Afghanistan."

"That's my point. SHE doesn't belong to him anymore than the life he assumed here. Besides, if OUR Logan didn't die in that explosion, what makes you so sure YOUR Logan did?"

"He's right, Lorne. Colonel Devane was held in Afghanistan for a long time before she was freed. Maybe yours was, too. With you stranded in Pegasus, and the Daedalus not reaching Atlantis before it was destroyed, you'd have no way of knowing, would you?" Carter added.

"So what good would that do him, if we went back? We'd still be cut off, with no way to get back home."

Carter's eyes lit up. "Wait...You said you lost most of the Ancient technology when you had to destroy Atlantis?"

"Yes."

"Were you able to take anything with you?"

"Like what?"

"The control crystal in the DHD. The one that allowed only the Atlantis gate to dial Earth."

"Oh that, yeah. Our McKay insisted. But we still didn't have a strong enough power source to power the gate."

"Lieutenant, do you really think we'd send you back empty handed?" Carter grinned.

"You...you would do that? Help us?" Lorne looked at her wide-eyed.

"We would do that. And more," she smiled.

"What do you mean?"

"I take it you haven't found, and are not aware that there are other Ancient cities lying dormant in Pegasus?"

Lorne's eyes widened even more. "There...Are you serious?"

"Very. Along with a few ZPM's, we'll also give you the coordinates to those Ancient cities. Some are still intact, just like Atlantis was, and some were destroyed. Between those, the control crystal, and the ZPM's, you could find your way back to Earth in no time." Carter assured him.

"Still feel like staying here?" McKay asked.

"I'm convinced. The Major might not be so easy to convince. Everything he ever wanted is right here."

 **NEW LANTEA**

"Are you serious?!" Logan gasped, her eyes alive with excitement.

"Completely."

"Then this is less a search and rescue and more of what it was intended to be after all!" she said.

"I will gladly show you exactly where these other cities are, I'll give you all the intel WE have, but..."

"You wanna go home," she finished for him.

He shrugged and smiled down at her. "Even in an alternate reality, you know me too well."

She winced and tried to smile. "Well that particular thing isn't so hard to figure out. Why would you want to stay here when you have so much back there?"

"I keep having to remind myself that you're not her," he murmured sadly.

"Same here," she smiled wistfully. "I've missed you...HIM...so much."

"I think I can say, unequivocally, that he feels the same way."

She looked up at him and studied his face thoughtfully. "It was miserable for you, wasn't it? That time when you thought I'd... um... SHE'D been killed in Afghanistan?"

"It was nothing short of excruciating," he nodded, pain washing across his face.

"The whole time I was there, I kept thinking about how devastated... John...must be, thinking I was dead. That hurt more than being held captive."

Sheppard smiled. "She told me exactly the same thing."

"We're that much alike, eh?"

"It's eery," he shook his head.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Why didn't you ever tell her how you felt about her? Before Afghanistan, I mean."

He shrugged and let out a deep breath. "Honestly, we just weren't THERE yet, not back then. I think a part of me always knew that I was in love with her, which is probably why, any time she had a date or a boyfriend, I acted like..."

"A rabid guard dog?" she finished for him, her eyes twinkling with mirth.

"Yeah, pretty much."

"So, when she finally reached Atlantis, is that when you told her?"

"Nope."

"Stubborn much?"

"Hah! No, it's like I said, we weren't THERE yet. She was still dealing with Daniel stuff, then she had a brief...uh...crush on someone else for a little while..." he trailed off uncomfortably, when he saw her eyes light up.

"Really? Who?"

"No, no, no, you don't really want to know..."

"If you think about it, I might already know, given that we're the same person," she grinned.

"I don't think so. You weren't living in Atlantis, so the opportunity probably never presented itself in your reality."

"It was Colonel Caldwell, wasn't it?" she blushed furiously.

"Oh God, you didn't..."

"No," she chuckled. "No, never. I just...We got very close, working at the SGC. After his wife died, we got closer, but I never so much as told him that I had a massive crush on him."

"Good."

"I take it your Logan did?"

He nodded and looked away. "Very briefly."

"That must have hurt," she acknowledged.

"I was more worried for her, about what it could do to her career. I was mad at him for even putting her in that position."

"Ah..."

"What?"

"Nothing! It was all just concern for her, I get it."

"You're a real laugh riot, you know that?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Yes. Yes, I do," she teased.

"Anything else you want to know?"

"We're still on THIS subject, Flyboy. So how long did you wait before you finally told her?"

"Heh! Actually SHE was the one who finally admitted to having the hots for ME!" he smiled his patented cocky grin.

"Oh really?"

"Yes really. She saw some other women who SHE says were hitting on me and she blew a gasket."

"Nuh-uh!" she gasped.

"It's true. She didn't make a scene there, in front of everybody, but we got into an argument and she went tearing off in one of the jumpers."

"So you went after her..."

"I did. We fought some more, argued a little and she finally admitted that she loved me."

"And you...?"

"I told her I'd loved her all my life," he grinned happily, remembering everything that had happened afterwards.

"Aren't you sweet?" she murmured. "I never could have imagined..." she trailed off thoughtfully.

He decided to turn the tables on her. "Oh no...? That's not what she told me."

"What?!" she yelped.

"She told me that there were many times over the years when she would... wonder about the possibility of us hooking up," he informed her.

" _Did_ she now?" It was her turn to blush. "Your Logan has a bit of a big mouth, I'm afraid."

"So, you never once even considered the idea?" he asked knowingly.

"We're not talking about me, we're talking about you."

He smiled down at her and decided to let her off the hook. He knew the answer anyway, he could see it in her eyes, even if he hadn't already heard it from HIS Logan.

"Okay, shall we call Caldwell and Sumner in here and let them in on the information I have?"

"Good idea. They'll be thrilled."

"As long as they don't try to keep me here against my will just to pump me for information."

"I really can't see them doing that, John. The only reason they would is if they can't figure out a way to send you home and get back OUR Sheppard and Lorne."

"Yeah, well, here's a little added incentive. If I know them, and I mean MY them, they're working on the problem AND they're planning on sending the same intel I just told you about, along with a couple of ZPM's for good measure."

"ZPM's...How did you find ZPM's?"

 **ATLANTIS**

"The Quantum mirror wouldn't work, Rodney, we don't have the remote control device to dial between realities." Carter reminded him.

"Right, I forgot."

"Doesn't the Ancient database contain any information about that thing? Maybe how to construct one, or tell how to control it?" Logan asked desperately.

"Not that I've seen, but then again, I never really looked for it before," McKay replied.

"We've had no reason to, before. We can check, but the database is..." Carter trailed off, her arms waving in the air.

"Ginormous, I know..." she sighed.

"I know you miss him," McKay began.

"I do, but I'm more worried that we won't be able to retrieve him, and I couldn't take that..." she admitted. Not again.

"We won't give up, Logan," McKay promised.

"I know. Thank you, Rodney," she hugged him fiercely.

"So...How MUCH like him is this guy?" he asked curiously.

"It's eery. Although, he's a lot more...bitter...maybe...or cynical, because of how things turned out in their reality. Being cut off and all, and being stranded there all this time, with no hope..."

"I'd be bitter, too." Carter admitted.

"Yeah...Or hardened, might be the right word," Logan added.

"Losing Atlantis had to be a tough blow," McKay ventured.

Logan nodded. "Yeah, he said it was awful. It crushed their spirit, at best."

"Have you told him about the other Ancient cities yet?"

She shook her head. "Not yet, but I plan on it. That, and the ZPM's. It may help..."

"The other Lorne said this Sheppard might not be so willing to go back," McKay told her.

"Why? With everything we're giving them, they'd be crazy not to..." she trailed off.

"Because of YOU," Carter informed her.

"Me?"

"Think about it, Logan, he's got everything he ever wanted, right here in front of him. Back there, he has...nothing..."

"Not nothing. With the ZPM's and everything else, he can go back to Earth and find HIS Logan, if that's what he wants, and..." she trailed off at the look on their faces.

"All true," McKay said. "But why should he when he already has that and the kids HERE."

"Because we don't belong to HIM, we belong to...OUR John Sheppard."

"WE know that...I have a feeling you might have to explain that to him," Carter warned her.

LATER

Logan thought about what they'd said, and when she returned to her quarters she decided to confront him about it. She sat him down and explained everything they were planning to give him, when they found a way to send him back. She emphasized how important it was for him to return to his own reality, to save the remaining members of his team and to help them all return to Earth. When she was finished, he sat there for a moment, thinking long and hard about what he wanted to say.

"What if I suggested that Lorne go back, alone, provided you find a way to open another conduit?"

She blinked. They were right. He didn't want to go back. "John, you HAVE to go back."

"Why should I?" he hissed. "Why can't *I* keep the little bit of happiness I found after all those years of misery?"

"It's not yours to keep, you KNOW that!" she scolded.

"I finally have the life I have always dreamed of, everything I have EVER wanted and I'm expected to give that up?!"

"It isn't YOURS," she reminded him.

"It is NOW," he argued.

"No, John, it isn't. Even if you stayed, you would not be Colonel John Sheppard, second in military command to General Caldwell. You would not have the things that HE worked so hard for."

"I'd have YOU, and the kids...That's all I really care about."

Her heart ached for him. He was so clearly in pain. "No, you wouldn't. You would be shipped back to Earth as soon as it was determined that we had no way to send you back."

"As long as you and the kids..."

"We wouldn't go with you."

"But..."

"I'm not your wife, and those are not your children."

"But if he can never come back to you..." he sputtered.

"Then I would stay alone for the rest of my life!" she said vehemently.

"Logan..."

"Please, John, listen to me. HEAR me. HE is the man I love. HE is my husband. HE is the father of my children - children who did NOT spring forth from YOUR loins, by the way, no matter how much you may wish that they did. You are NOT my John Sheppard, and you never will be."

"We're the same..."

"No, you aren't. You're a lot alike, yes, but there are differences. Differences that definitely set you apart. I don't want to hurt you, honestly, but you have to know... What you're saying...What you _think_ you want..."

"You," he said simply.

"You have your OWN Logan, and now you have the means to actually get to her. Why wouldn't you jump at the chance to have the real thing? The Logan YOU have known and loved all your life?"

He looked away for a moment before answering. "Chances are, even if she got out of Afghanistan, she's not MY Logan anymore."

"That may be true, and you should prepare yourself, if that turns out to be the case. I mean, what would you want for her, if the world considered you dead? Would you want her to be alone?"

"No," he shook his head sadly. "Which is why, after all this time, it only makes sense for her to have built a life for herself without me in it."

"And imagine what she would do if she looked up one day and saw you standing there. Do you really believe she would shut you out of her life?"

"I...I..." he shook his head blankly.

"Cause if she's ANYTHING at all like me, there's no way in hell that would happen."

A FEW DAYS LATER

While Carter, McKay and Zelenka worked feverishly on a way to send the alternate Sheppard and Lorne back, Logan took the time to show Sheppard all the possibilities that lay before him, provided he went back and embraced those possibilities. She could not say whether THAT Logan would still be an option for him, romantically speaking, she could say, with a reasonable degree of certainty that she would welcome him back into her life with open arms. They had always been as close as she and John had been over the years. The main thing that had caused the difference in their realities had been the failure of the Daedalus to arrive in time to save Atlantis. Everything changed after that, but now, with their help, Sheppard would have a chance to turn things around.

Logan had decided it would be alright, after all, for the children to spend some time with this Sheppard. She very carefully explained that this man had come from another time and place - almost identical to their own. It had taken some time, but Nic and Chelsea were able to understand the differences between this Sheppard and their own father. Tommy sort of understood that this man only looked like his father, and the twins didn't care as long as he played and cuddled with them.

On a whim, Logan dug out some of John's old football videos, popped up some popcorn and settled down with Sheppard to enjoy montages of his favorite football moments. She also invited Mike, Janet and the boys to come over to meet and spend some time with him. She wanted Sheppard to see that he would never be alone when he went back to his own reality. He'd been stunned and then ecstatic to learn he had a brother.

There was a part of him that had begun to look forward to returning to his own world, especially with the promise of the new *toys* they were sending along with him, but he'd gotten so attached to her and the children, the life they had built in Atlantis. The John Sheppard of this reality had it all. He wondered if he knew how good he really had it, but one look at Logan and he was sure that he knew. As much as he looked forward to being able to help his own people, he wasn't at all looking forward to walking away from the life he saw here.

Oh, he believed that Logan would have nothing to do with him, if they couldn't send him back, or if he refused to go, but...He just wished he could take it all with him. He knew now that he wanted a family, children - THESE children - as in his own realities version of the same kids. He shook his head as he thought about how he was going to make this dream a reality.

"Are we making it harder for you to leave?" Simmons asked.

He shrugged. "Yes and no. I see the possibilities for my own life, but..."

"You're not sure you can make it a reality?" he finished for him.

"Right."

"If your Logan is anything like ours, I'd say that part should be easy."

"Not if she's already married and has a family with someone else."

"You know what? I'm not an advocate for busting up marriages or anything, but I have seen her and John together for years. I was here when we thought John was dead, and how hard it was for her to move on and build a new life for herself and the kids. It took her two years before she let anyone get close, even Cameron," he noticed him stiffen at the mention of Mitchell's name, but he continued on. "And when John returned, there was no keeping the two of them apart. Everyone knew they belonged together, that they were - ARE - soulmates, even Cameron, but she felt guilty and rotten, and, and, and..." he trailed off with a sigh. "

"So, you're saying that even if MY Logan is married and has a family... She'll leave them for me?" he gaped at Simmons.

"Hey, I don't know anything for sure, except that Logan loves John, with her whole entire being. Your life seems to parallel theirs, up to a certain point. So... You never know."

"I don't want to wreck anything she has..." Sheppard murmured.

"There's something else you have to consider," Simmons pointed out.

"What's that?"

"OUR John Sheppard has been over there, in your reality. And he is going to be working on a way to get back here, for reasons you already know."

"I'm sure," Sheppard smiled.

"It's likely he's already telling them about the other Ancient cities and all the stuff we've told you. Now we're still sending you back with their locations, just in case, but, with any luck, they might have already been able to contact Earth, and if they have..."

"Logan might already know about me," he smiled.

"Yeah. The thing I've been wondering about is, even though the Daedalus didn't reach you before Atlantis was destroyed, I can't see them giving up on the possibility of ever finding you guys, or that their might be other Ancient cities waiting to be found in Pegasus."

"Makes sense," Sheppard shrugged.

"So, with John's help, they could be sending out an SOS on the Air Force frequency and, if the Daedalus happens to be cruising nearby..."

"I see what you mean," Sheppard grinned.

"My brother is a very determined and capable man," Simmons smiled. "Just think what you could accomplish if you were anywhere near as determined as he?"


	90. Chapter 90

**NEW LANTEA**

"I still can't believe the two of us...uh...you... got married," Logan said, shaking her head.

"Is the idea so revolting to you?" he teased.

"NO! No, of course not. I just..."

"It's not like you've never thought about being with him, after all," he tried not to smile.

"Sure, yeah, I might have entertained the idea, occasionally," she admitted.

"And?" he prodded.

"I think you already know the answer to that, so I'm not gonna play along with you!"

He laughed, good-naturedly and decided to let it drop.

"He's gonna wig-out when he comes back and finds me married, isn't he?" she asked, suddenly serious.

"Oh, I'd say there's an excellent chance of that. But, if he loves you as much as I love MY Logan, he's going to care more about you being happy than himself."

She looked up at him, nodding slowly and thoughtfully. "I know."

"Are you sorry you married Cameron?" he asked, studying her carefully.

"No! Cam's a good man. He's been wonderful to me."

"I'm sure," Sheppard agreed.

She looked him in the eye, as if to judge his sincerity, but he didn't appear to be teasing or patronizing her.

"I told you, MY Cameron Mitchell turned out to be one of the best friends I've ever had. There was a time when I was lost, presumed dead, for three years. He took care of my family, helped Logan to heal and..."

"He married her?!" she finished for him.

He shook his head. "Wasn't too happy about it at first, and they were only... uh... intimate the one time - and the twins were the result, but time and distance tends to give one perspective. My youngest son was conceived with another woman..." he trailed off as she gasped in shock. "The woman who found and healed me, she took it upon herself to take my memory, too. She made me believe that she was my wife the whole time. Tommy was the result of that."

"How... _sad_ ," she stammered, at a loss for words.

"Yes, it was," he nodded. "Logan, of course, welcomed Tommy with open arms, and she's been more of a true mother to him than his biological mom ever was."

"I should hope so!" Logan muttered.

He nodded, smiling broadly. "She took me back, completely understanding about what had happened..."

"Wait, so she did just DUMP Cameron then..."

"It wasn't like that. I mean, Cam knew the morning after they... um.. yeah... that it was not gonna happen for them - not that anyone asked him to - he stepped aside. I mean, he was there for her during her pregnancy and then with the twins. It took Logan a bit longer to come to terms with everything - get over the guilt she shouldn't have been feeling... But hey! We're soulmates, so it was inevitable."

"And you think it's inevitable that Cam and I split up to make room for MY John Sheppard?" she asked.

"Not for me to say. There are alot of things that turned out way different in this reality as opposed to my own. I can't say what effect all that would have on how the two of you feel about each other."

"Fair enough," she agreed.

"Look, I'm really not trying to influence you either way, okay? You DO know that, don't you?" he asked.

"I know," she smiled, patting him on the shoulder. "I never thought you were."

"Okay...Good."

"So, I hear you've been haranguing Dr. McKay a lot," she changed the subject.

"He works well under pressure," Sheppard quipped.

"Uh-huh... Not from what I've heard!" she laughed.

"He's the single best chance I have of getting home," he reminded her.

"I can see how much you miss... your family."

"They are _EVERYTHING_ to me," he admitted.

"It's nice... Kind of comforting, actually, to see how much you love her - and your family. I always knew you... uh, John... would be a wonderful father someday," she told him.

"Thanks. But they make it easy," he grinned, his eyes shining with love.

"I'm really glad we've had a chance to talk, while you've been here. You're everything I always imagined John would turn out to be, given the chance," she sighed happily. "Not that mine wasn't... before..."

"Thanks again, but Logan deserves a lot of the credit for that."

"I think she'd disagree," she smiled.

"Probably. But it'd be one of the very FEW things she's ever been wrong about."

Logan studied his face carefully, took notice of the love shining in his eyes every time he spoke of (or thought of) Logan. HIS Logan. She was a lucky woman. A sudden knock at the door broke her out of her reverie, and she hurried to answer it. McKay burst into the room and started rambling a mile a minute.

"Rodney!" Sheppard barked.

"Huh?" McKay blinked at him.

"Slow down and don't ramble. Now, have you figured out how to get me back?" Sheppard asked.

"Uh, no... Not yet. But I can tell you that it WAS the light wave that caused you to jump realities, no question."

"Great! But, isn't that what we were assuming anyway?" Sheppard asked.

"Well, yeah, but... Knowing for sure goes a long way toward helping us reverse the process. I just wanted to let you know, before you come knocking down the door in the lab again."

"Fine. Good. Thanks for the update," he grunted.

 **ATLANTIS**

Sheppard continued to watch Logan and the children intently, even longingly. Christmas was a mere two weeks away and, though they didn't have a whole lot of Christmas decor on display, they were definitely caught up in the Spirit - even without THEIR Sheppard, though he suspected that was Logan attempting to keep things on an even keel for the kids. She completely trusted Carter and McKay to return her husband to her and the children in plenty of time for Christmas.

He'd already resigned himself to returning to his own reality, but it still tugged at his heart when he thought about leaving all of this - despite the fact that he knew none of it belonged to him, and never would, as Logan had brutally and honestly pointed out to him. She'd been generous enough to allow him to share in their lives, for however long he would be there, and he reminded himself to be grateful for the tiny glimpse they had given him of his own possible future.

He wasn't the only one listening to Logan and the children as they sat around the modest Christmas tree in the living room singing Christmas Carols. Simmons was there, Janet, their sons, Daniel Jackson and his family, and Caldwell with his family. All the kids were sitting with Logan, with the exception of the tiny baby in Kitah's arms. Even the twins were trying to sing along with the others, while Logan sang and played the guitar. He'd almost forgotten what an incredible voice she had, and hearing her sing again made him both happy and sad at the same time. Chelsea seemed to be following in her mother's footsteps, vocally. Her voice was as clear and strong and perfect as Logan's, and he found himself smiling proudly, despite the fact that she wasn't truly HIS daughter.

Another knock at the door brought him face-to-face with Cameron Mitchell and his family. He instinctively tensed up, but he forced himself to relax and remember that THIS Logan did not belong to him. He'd also started to try and take to heart everything that Logan had told him about Mitchell. Seeing him there, with his wife and new daughters, made it a little easier for him to be civil, at least, to the man. When he motioned them inside, he offered his hand to Mitchell, and he shook it graciously.

"John, I'd like you to meet my wife, Riateh. This is her first real social outing since the twins were born," he explained.

"It is very nice to meet you, John, and a little surreal," she smiled.

Her eyes twinkled and her tone was warm and inviting. She, too was very beautiful, and he could easily see why Mitchell might fall for her.

"It's nice to meet you, too. Who do we have here?" he asked, smiling down at the tiny twin girls bundled up in soft, pink blankets.

"These are our daughters, Elexa and Serena," she replied proudly.

"They are beautiful, just like their mother," he pronounced sincerely.

"Thank you. And YOU, sir, are every bit as charming as OUR John Sheppard," she smiled.

He grinned broadly and helped Mitchell get her settled into a comfortable chair. There was no shortage of volunteers to hold the twins for her after that. Mitchell took the opportunity to stand back and watch the others with Sheppard.

"It must be hard for you to leave all of this," Mitchell ventured.

Sheppard nodded. "It is. And I guess it's fair to say you know that from experience, huh?"

Mitchell arched an eyebrow at him, but his tone wasn't accusatory as it had been before. "Yes, I do. But John and Logan have been extremely generous...with themselves and the kids. I haven't lost them completely."

"Them...The kids, or..." he trailed off, looking at Logan.

"John and Logan, as well as the kids. John and I were the best of friends before, and we managed to find our way back to that friendship and trust again when he came back. Logan aside, he and I have always had a lot in common, and that's what we bonded over, well before he and Logan became a couple."

"That's what she said," Sheppard admitted.

"Things are great now, they're happy, Riateh and I are happy, most importantly, the children are happy. And with seven kids between us now, that's a damned good thing, cause they have us all outnumbered!" he laughed.

"I have to admit, it is nice to see the way you've all made it work, you know, the way you share the load," Sheppard murmured.

"Thanks. It wasn't always easy, but it's sooooo worth it." Mitchell smiled.

"So I gather."

"Are you worried that Logan won't be there for you, when you get back?" Mitchell asked.

"It's been a long time. You know our history, it's virtually the same as theirs, up to the time I came to Pegasus. We were friends, with no hint of anything more... I thought she was dead, so I never even considered the notion of her getting married - to me or anyone else."

"And now, knowing that she's probably alive and MAY be married to someone else?"

"It's killing me, but had I known she was alive all this time...I would have wanted her to go on with her life, I would have wanted her to be happy. I *DO* want her to be happy."

"Even if that means letting go of your own desire to build a life with her?" Mitchell asked.

He paused thoughtfully then nodded. "Even so," he admitted.

"Then you're a lot more like OUR Sheppard than you realize." Mitchell smiled.

 **NEW LANTEA**

Sheppard stood at the mirror and stared blankly at the image before him. He wasn't seeing himself, he was seeing Logan; HIS Logan, and the children. It was almost Christmas, and he wanted to make it back home in time to celebrate with his family. It may have been less than a week since he'd seen them, but it felt more like a year. It always did when he was forced to be away from them. He'd been trying not to think about how upset Logan would be, knowing that they were once again forced apart by circumstances beyond their control. He also knew that she would be badgering THEIR McKay as relentlessly as he was badgering THIS McKay to find a way to get him home.

He turned as Logan entered the quarters assigned to him, without knocking. She stopped in her tracks and tried desperately not to stare at the sight of him, clad only in a pair of boxers. He'd clearly just woken up and hadn't had time to shower or dress. She blushed slightly as her eyes were drawn to his bare chest and the liberal sprinkling of hair angling down to his navel and...

"Sorry," she murmured, turning around to give him some privacy.

Though a little self-conscious himself, he managed to brush off the discomfort. "Nothing you haven't seen before," he quipped, reaching for his pants and pulling them on.

Feeling just the slightest bit mischievious, he decided to leave his shirt off. Just to give her a glimpse of what it was she'd be missing when her own Sheppard returned. It was mean, sure, and childish, but hey, why NOT give his counterpart a bit of help?

"What's up?" he asked, not the least bit self-conscious now.

"Um...Colonel Caldwell and Colonel Sumner wanted to see you," she replied nervously.

"Oh, great," he said.

He grabbed his shirt and made a point of slowly putting it on, just to prolong the moment. He smiled to himself when he caught her watching his every move as his fingers slowly and methodically buttoned each one of the buttons, starting with the bottom button and working his way up. He was no Schwarzenegger, to be sure, but he was fit, strong and toned enough. His own Logan was happy with his body, so he knew he had nothing to be ashamed of. Well except, of course, the way he was blatantly taunting and teasing her now.

"Coming with?" he asked.

"Huh?" she shook her head and looked up at his face.

"Are you coming with me?" he asked, a smile dancing in his eyes.

"Oh, no...I have some other things to take care of. I'll catch up to you later," she replied absently.

"Okey-dokey," he left the room whistling softly to himself.

He knew he should be ashamed of himself, but he wasn't. THAT part shamed him, but not enough to feel bad about what he'd done. Logan, HIS Logan would probably scold him when he admitted what he'd done, but he still felt it was worth it.

After he left, Logan sat on the bed and took a few deep breaths. She knew what he was doing, of course, but she'd reacted precisely the way he'd hoped she would. Now, what did that say about _her_? She loved her husband. Cameron Mitchell was a wonderful man, a great husband... So why had she reacted so strongly to the sight of a half-naked Sheppard? Why had she felt the almost irresistible urge to run her fingers across his naked flesh and... _NO_! she was not going to go THERE! She really did love Cam; truly and deeply. They had even been talking about starting a family soon.

She closed her eyes and recalled in vivid detail the lines of Sheppard's body. Sure, she'd seen him in nothing but swim trunks before, many, many times, and THEY didn't cover anything more than his boxers did, so why was it like she was seeing him for the first time?

"I'll tell you why?" she said to herself. "It's because you know that in some realities out there you're actually married to the guy - AND you LIKE the idea!" she shook her head. "But you love your husband, Logan Devane, so stop beahving like some overly hormonal teenager!" she scolded herself harshly.

By the time he found Sumner, Caldwell had been called away to handle a dispute between McKay and another scientist. Sheppard decided to take the opportunity to have a real talk with Sumner, somehow needing to explain what had happened to the Sumner in his reality.

"Can we talk, sir, about something that happened to us in MY reality?" Sheppard asked.

"Lemme guess," Sumner began. "I'm dead in your reality?"

Sheppard winced and then nodded.

"I had a feeling. Something about the look in your eyes whenever you see me. So, what happened?"

Sheppard took a deep breath and then launched into a detailed report of everything that had happened to them that day. It all sounded familiar, right up until the point that THIS Sheppard accompanied Sumner and a team to the planet Athos, to look for a suitable refuge for their expedition. After that, it was like Sheppard was describing someone else. Of course, the things that HIS Sumner did and said were the same type of things he, himself, would do or say.

When Sheppard finally reached the point where the Wraith caretaker had literally drained almost every ounce of life from his body, Sumner finally winced and looked at Sheppard with a deep compassion Sheppard had never hoped he'd be able to see, for the choice that had been forced upon him. When he finished, the pain in his eyes was as real and raw as if it had just happened.

"Well, Sheppard, all I can tell you is... You did the right thing."

Sheppard looked at him with disbelieving eyes.

"I know that if it had been ME, and I mean THIS me, I know for a fact that I would have wanted you to do the same thing," he told him.

"Thank you, sir."

"I mean it, Sheppard. I'm not a coward, by any means, and I've always known that I might have to lay down my life in service to my Country, I accepted that. But if I were put in a position like that, where I was virtually dead already, suffering, and with no hope of recovery...? I'd be glad to know you were there to put an end to it."

"That means a lot to me, sir," Sheppard murmured gratefully.

"You've been carrying that around for a long time, haven't you, son?"

"Yes, sir, I have."

Sumner put a comforting hand on his shoulder and squeezed it lightly. "No more doubts, Sheppard. It's time to let it go now."

Sheppard swallowed hard and looked at Sumner with admiration and gratitude. A huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. "Yes, sir."

 **ATLANTIS**

It was Christmas Eve day. Not her first without Sheppard, but it was just as difficult and painful as the other ones he'd missed. She'd been harranguing McKay gently but relentlessly for a way to get her husband home, but they hadn't come up with any answers so far. She'd been struggling to hold herself together for the sake of the children, but it was getting progressively more difficult to keep up the brave front.

She'd been allowing the other Sheppard to spend as much time with the children as they wanted, for him and for them, so they wouldn't miss their father so much. Even though they knew this man was not their real father, he was a living, breathing personification of him, and it was helping...THEM.

"Logan!" McKay burst through her front door without knocking.

Startled, Logan whirled on him, poised to strike until she realized who it was.

"Rodney! What the hell...?"

"Sorry...Uh...Not alot of time..."

"For what?"

"Where's uh, Sheppard 2.0?" he asked.

"He's down at the docks with the Chelsea, Nic and Tommy."

"We need to get him...Now!" McKay said urgently.

"Rodney...Did you figure out a way to..."

He held up a hand to cut her off. "Yes, but we have to move and move FAST. We already have the supplies together that we're sending back with he and Lorne 2.0, but we have very little time to get where we need to be."

"Where?" she asked.

"Clear on the other side of the galaxy. That light wave hits just a few more planets before it disappears for the next hundred years."

Logan keyed her mic. "Sheppard, this is Devane..."

Within ten minutes the team was assembled and ready to move out. Fortunately for them, the planet they were traveling to was within the gate network, so they wouldn't have to travel via the Daedalus, though it was also being dispatched as a safety measure. Ford was actually looking forward to going back, something he wouldn't have been able to say before. Sheppard was a little less enthusiastic, but he didn't put up a fight, though he wished he could have spent a little more time with Logan and the kids before going back to his own world. He also wished he'd had more time to say goodbye to them, rather than being ripped away on a moment's notice.

What he didn't know was that among the things he'd be taking back to his own reality, Logan had tucked a few personal momentos into his tactical vest for him to find once he returned home. She had selected a few photographs of the children, and one of herself with the children. He already had a photo of himself with the children, taken when they were on the mainland for a surfing trip. The children had made little drawings and craftwork for him to keep as well. He would be pleased and, she hoped, touched by what the children had done for him.

From everything Sheppard and Lorne had told them about their reality, she knew the odds were against them that their own Sheppard and Lorne would know how to get back on their own, but Rodney had given them the locations and gate addresses of the remaining planets that would be hit with the strange light wave before it disappeared from the galaxy for a hundred years. It was their hope that they could make it to one of those planets in time, once this Sheppard gave them that information.

Logan held her breath as she followed McKay, Mitchell, Caldwell, Carter, Daniel, and the alternate Lorne and Sheppard through the gate. A moment after setting foot on PJ5-008, the light wave phenomenon appeared in the distance. With no more time for goodbyes or well wishes, Lorne and Sheppard, loaded down with the supplies given to them, took off straight for the wave at a dead run.

Caldwell wrapped an arm around Logan's shoulders, offering his quiet strength and comfort to her as the rest of them held their breath and hoped for the best. Mitchell reached out and took her opposite hand in his and squeezed it reassuringly. If their Sheppard and Logan didn't materialize immediately after the wave passed, they would turn around and head to the next planet in line after this one and resume their waiting and watching.

Just before the wave reached them, Logan saw Sheppard turn his head and look back in her direction. Their eyes met over the distance separating them, and after one last, longing look, Sheppard plunged forward into the light.

 **NEW LANTEA**

"You're serious?" Sheppard stared at McKay.

"We don't have time to debate, either you trust me and take the chance or live out the rest of your life in THIS reality," McKay sneered haughtily.

"Let's go!" Sheppard bolted for the door.

Caldwell, Sumner, McKay and Weir watched him go, exchanging stunned glances.

"Well?" McKay asked the rest of them.

"It's his choice," Sumner replied. "I say we back him up."

Caldwell shrugged and stood up to follow Sheppard out the door. He hoped that this reality's version of Sheppard was made of the same metal as that one was. As much as he'd been prepared not to like Sheppard, he did, and he respected him. At least this one anyway.

They caught up to Sheppard and Lorne as they were about to be beamed down to the planet to take the Stargate to the planet due to be hit by the odd light phenomenon. Sheppard glanced up, hoping to see Logan before they left, and was rewarded by the sight of her running down the hall towards them. She said nothing, but took her place beside Caldwell to beam down to the planet with them. Five minutes later, they emerged on the other planet in time to see the light wave sweep ahead of them and out of range. Sheppard and Lorne were crestfallen, realizing that they had missed their last, best chance of getting home.

"Oh...God..." Logan gasped as the light quickly faded, then turned to face a downcast Sheppard.

"Is this the last planet that thing is going to pass?" Sumner asked.

All eyes turned to McKay, who fidgeted nervously. "I...don't know...As soon as I figured out that it was coming here I let Sheppard know."

"So it's possible it might go to another planet?" Sheppard asked hopefully.

"Well, sure, I suppose," McKay nodded.

"Wait!" Lorne cried out, pointing at two figures lying on the ground in the distance.

Caldwell pulled the mini-binoculars from Sheppard's tactical vest and took a closer look. "Well," he began, "It appears we've picked up ANOTHER Sheppard and Lorne."

"What?!" Sheppard took the binoculars back and looked for himself.

The surreality of watching himself from a distance was not lost on him. He watched in disbelief as his other self struggled to get to his knees and then to his feet.

"Maybe that's YOUR Sheppard and Lorne," he suggested.

"One way to find out," Caldwell replied, stepping forward to greet the newcomers.

The other Sheppard had managed to get to his feet, on shaky legs, and was helping Lorne get up by the time they reached him. When he looked up, he saw Sumner first, then Caldwell. He wondered if they'd made it back to the right reality, but then he came face to face with his other self.

"Sheppard?" Sumner asked.

Sheppard jumped and tore his eyes away from his alternate self. "Sir?"

"Report."

"Uh...I have to wonder if we made it back to the right place, sir. The Colonel there wasn't here when I left..." he indicated Caldwell.

"A lot's happened while you were gone," Sumner replied.

"That's for sure, sir. And I...uh...we brought back gifts," he smiled.

"ZPM's?" Sheppard asked himself.

"Yeah...And other stuff...I take it you didn't make it here before the wave passed?"

"No," Sheppard shook his head sadly.

The other Sheppard reached into his tactical vest and pulled out a piece of paper with three gate addresses, handing it to himself.

"I believe your family is waiting for you, so you better get going."

"What is this?" Sheppard asked himself.

"The last three planets that wave is going to hit. I wish I had more time to explain, but..."

"Understood..." Sheppard motioned to Lorne and took a few steps back before stopping and turning to face his other self again. "They're...okay...?"

"They're fine."

Sheppard nodded and looked over at Logan, who had thus far gone unnoticed by his other self. "There's uh...someone else who wasn't here when you left, too." He pointed behind the other Sheppard and smiled as his other self gaped in disbelief at the sight of Logan standing there.

"Good luck... All of you," Sheppard called out.

He and Lorne broke into a run toward the Stargate and immediately dialed the first address on the list provided by his other self. Before stepping through the gate, he turned back to see himself embracing Logan in a fierce bear hug.

Sumner and Caldwell motioned McKay, Weir and Lorne aside, allowing Logan and Sheppard a few moments of privacy. They spoke with Lorne while Sheppard and Logan caught up on everything. Lorne happily informed them about all the "gifts" they had received from the team in the alternate reality, including the addresses of Ancient cities still within the Pegasus galaxy, thereby giving them hope of establishing a strong foothold there, a real chance at fighting back against the Wraith, and the power to be able to travel back and forth, via Stargate between Earth and Pegasus.

"So, I guess you know now how I survived what happened in Afghanistan?" Logan asked.

Sheppard smiled. "I should have known you weren't really gone," he admitted.

"No recriminations now. We're alive, we're together...That's all I care about right now."

"I assume the other me told you about life in his reality?" he asked.

She blushed prettily. "Yes, he did. Five kids, huh? Really?" she asked.

Sheppard nodded. "Yup."

From an inside pocket of his tactical vest, he pulled out the photograph he knew about already. A photo of himself with all five kids at the beach on the Lantean mainland. Logan took it from him and studied it closely, an awestruck smile lighting her beautiful face.

"Wow..." she breathed. "Those Sheppard genes run pretty strong, don't they?" she teased.

"Cadence here," he pointed. "She looks like you."

"Yeah, she does," she admitted.

She looked up at his handsome face and saw all the love there she had been told by his alternate self to expect. It nearly broke her heart knowing she would have to tell him about Cameron before they left to go back to the Daedalus.


	91. Chapter 91

They waited on 008 until the Daedalus arrived to confirm no other life signs on the planet. Logan held her head as high as she could, having gone into this knowing that her Sheppard wouldn't have the same access as their Rodney and Carter to the information in the ancient database. That had been the reason behind sending the other gate addresses with Sheppard and Lorne. She knew that her Sheppard would be fighting with everything he had to get back to her and the children. As soon as the Daedalus sent confirmation, they immediately dialed the next planet to be visited by the light wave, J59-853. Logan stepped resolutely through the event horizon, determined to hold onto hope and to the belief that Sheppard would emerge unscathed on one of the remaining planets.

It took about an hour for the light wave to finally reach 853. Logan and the others watched and waited expectantly as the wave crashed into the planet and began creeping across the barren ground about a hundred yards from where they waited. Everyone had their eyes glued to their binoculars as soon as the wave appeared and were intently scanning the horizon as the wave moved forward. Finally, after ten agonizing minutes of watching and waiting, Caldwell shouted out that he'd seen something.

Sheppard and Lorne were flung forward as the wave overtook and passed them, just as before. They hit the ground hard; the wind getting knocked out of them in the process. It took a while for either of them to shake it off and try to get to their feet. But before either of them could see anything, they heard the hoots and hollers of familiar voices in the distance. Sheppard raised his head and scanned the desolate ground surrounding him for the source of the noise. In the distance, he saw several people waving to him from a rise about a hundred yards away. After pointing them out to Lorne, he saw one figure racing towards him at breakneck speed.

"Logan!" he called.

Lorne ran on ahead of him, knowing Sheppard would appreciate a few moments alone with the wife he hadn't seen in weeks. Logan and Sheppard collided together and wrapped around one another as they fell to the ground with the force of their impact. Instantly, their lips fused together, clinging desperately to one another as tears streamed down both their faces. There was no doubt about it: This man was the genuine article!

"God, baby I missed you so much!" Sheppard said breathlessly in her ear.

"I missed you, too!" she cried.

He pulled back and took her face in his hands. "The kids, they're okay?"

She nodded, reaching up to caress his face. "Everyone's fine, except for missing you," she assured him.

"I'm so glad you guys thought to send back those gate coordinates," he murmured.

"Yeah, well, I wasn't about to take any chances," she grinned. "I understand things were a lot tougher there than here."

"Yeah, it was pretty bad," he admitted.

"Am I... Was I..."

"Alive?" he finished for her. She nodded. "Yeah... In fact you, the other you, showed up in Pegasus not too long after we got there."

"Really?" she brightened considerably. "So he DOES have a chance with... her."

Sheppard shrugged and threw his hands up. "There are a few obstacles to overcome," he began.

"Since when has that ever stopped us?" she teased.

"Never..."

"What?" she asked, sobering somewhat.

"I'm sure he already filled you in on how our respective paths diverged when the Wraith attacked Atlantis?"

She nodded. "Yes. He never knew that I survived Afghanistan."

"She wasn't exactly..."

"Exactly what?"

"Alone... When she came to Pegasus."

"Not alone... What, through the Stargate or on the Daedalus?"

"The Daedalus."

"So? A whole ship full of people...Wait...Are you saying that she was with, WITH someone...?"

He nodded, an ironic smile on his face.

"Who?"

"Cam."

"Oh, Cameron. Well, he didn't much like him when he first arrived here..." she cringed at the memory.

"Then he'll like him even less now," Sheppard grimaced.

Logan paused and looked him in the eye. "Are you saying she was...That Cam and her were..."

"Married." Sheppard confirmed with a nod.

She drew back in shock. "Oh crap... That's not going to go over very well..."

"Yeah, well... I also kind of maybe futzed things up there..."

Logan eyed him suspiciously. "What did you..." she trailed off at the twinkle in his eye. "You flirted with her, didn't you? Made her see what she'd be missing or something?"

She knew him so well. "I did not flirt with her! I knew she wasn't you..."

"You did SOMETHING!" she accused sternly.

"I think we'll have to talk about that later, it looks like the troops are moving in," he motioned at the approaching figures who had hung back for a while to give them some privacy.

"I won't forget this, you know?" she warned, hugging him fiercely.

"I know, Sparks."

"Fine, then give us another kiss before they get here," she demanded.

ATLANTIS - LATER

"So, you weren't really flirting with her, you were just parading around in front of her without your shirt?"

Sheppard shrugged, grinning sheepishly. "Just, you know, letting her see what she might be missing..." he admitted.

"Uh huh...And since you know that *I* can't resist ravishing you at the mere glimpse of a bit of skin..." she arched an eyebrow at him.

He shrugged again. "Hey, _that's_ completely mutual - although, you can be completely covered up and get me going just by saying my name... or smiling at me... or breathing..." he trailed off, leering at her suggestively.

"John Sheppard!" she hissed.

"What?!" he tried his best to assume an innocent expression.

"You know that poor woman doesn't stand a chance now - not in the face of your...your...your..." she trailed off in exasperation.

"My...?" he winked.

She slapped at him playfully. "You KNOW what I'm talking about. I'm just saying, it's not like you to...I mean, she WAS married, John."

"Uh huh."

"And you deliberately tried to come between her and her husband. You wouldn't do that to ME."

"Sparks, honey, that's exactly what I did, remember? When I came back from the dead?"

"No you didn't... Not really."

"Of course I did."

"That was a completely different situation."

"Not that different."

"Sure it is. WE were married, and had a family before you... And THEY weren't! They didn't build a life together, have it torn apart and have to rebuild. She married Cam and built a life with him, never having known what a life with you could be."

"So, what's your point?" he asked uncomfortably.

"If that had been us, if I were married to someone else and you suddenly came back into the picture...I know you love me enough to let me continue being happy."

"*IF* I believed you were really happy," he clarified.

"Of course."

"Well, yeah. But I know you're the happiest with ME!" he grinned boyishly.

"Yes, my love, I am. Don't you think she was happy with Cam? Before you muddied the water, I mean."

"Sure, up to a point," he shrugged.

Logan stared up at him in vexation.

"Look, Sparks... Suppose that _had_ been us, and when you made it back from Afghanistan, you found out that the entire Atlantis expedition, myself included, had just vanished without a trace. No one could contact us, no one could find Atlantis, so you never really knew what happened to me - whether I lived or died. You moved on with your life, met someone - like Cam - and built a life with him. How happy would you be, REALLY?"

She blinked and looked up into his eyes. He was right. If that had been them, and it happened before they came to their senses and realized that they were madly in love and destined to be together? Yes, she could have gone on, maybe even loved someone else, like Cam, but she would never really know the kind of happiness, the sense of being totally complete, as long as she never knew what had become of him. That point had already been proven after Sheppard's supposed death.

"Sparks?" he prodded.

"I would have been...incomplete," she admitted.

"So really, is what I did so terrible? It's not like I TOLD her that she had to dump Cameron and take up with me - the OTHER me. Everything I told her was the truth. She even admitted some of the same things you've told me before."

"About?"

"About how you did, once in a while, consider the idea of us being together - before."

"I see."

"Still mad?" he reached out, took her in his arms and pulled her against him.

"I'm not mad, John, I just...She...It's going to be ridiculously hard for her to deal with...everything... I feel bad for her."

"Bad?" he asked.

"Well, yeah...You know what a hard time I had - the guilt and everything - when you came back. Even before you came back."

"You know, as well as I do, that there's no way we could ever NOT be together and be happy."

"Yes, but..."

"I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to be mean, I'm just making a point."

"I know, and you're right. No matter how much she loves Cam, and it would have to be alot for her to have married him, there's no way she'll be able to fight her feelings for...the other you. She'll try, I know she will, but..."

"It's still going to hurt," he finished for her.

"Yeah. A LOT. But in the end..."

"They're going to be together."

Logan nodded then rested her face against his chest. "I have a confession to make."

"What's that?" he asked softly.

"I probably have no right to scold you the way I did," she admitted.

"No? Did a little encouraging of your own, huh?" he grinned wickedly.

"Maybe. I um...before he left, the kids and I sent along a few momentos for him to keep..."

"And share?" Sheppard asked knowingly.

"Um-hmm," she admitted.

"You wanted her to see the kids."

"I'd have been curious, in her shoes," she shrugged.

"You're right," he looked down at her with a gleam in his eye. "You had no right to scold me!"

"Forgive me?" she smiled sweetly up at him.

"Always, Sparky," he murmured before capturing her mouth with his own.

They'd already put the children to bed, with some difficulty since they were so excited about having Sheppard back with them, but they were all still snugly tucked into their beds and likely dreaming about the gifts they'd have waiting for them under the tree in the morning. With that in mind, it was easy enough to give in to the passion that was always simmering just below the surface between them. Sheppard carried her quickly into their bedroom and locked the door behind them, intent on demonstrating to Logan just how MUCH he had missed her.

TWO WEEKS LATER

Sheppard gawked, open-mouthed, at what he was seeing. He'd been dying for something just like this, but he never dared hope that they'd ever approve it. Not inside the city anyway. Unable to contain themselves any longer, Chelsea, Nic and Tommy squeezed past them, helmets and safety gear already on, and hit the ramp leading down into the newly built skateboard "park."

While it hadn't been built exclusively for Sheppard, everyone had wanted to keep it a surprise, knowing how much and how long he'd wanted one. The area where the kids were now skating was strictly for the children of Atlantis. The adult facility had been constructed the other side of the gymnasium-sized room. Each had everything they could ever possibly want, and a full-time staff to monitor the children.

"How?" he asked, his eyes wide as saucers.

"They started on it before you got sucked into that wave thing," she beamed.

"Wow... How did I miss that?" he asked.

"You thought the construction crew were here to expand the library, remember?"

He thought back for a moment. "Oh yeah, right..."

"So?" she prodded.

"I... you mind if I go get my board?" his eyes shone with anticipation.

"It's already in your locker over there," she held up a shiny, silver key. "Along with your helmet and safety gear."

"Cool!" he grinned boyishly, planted a quick kiss on her lips and then jogged over to his locker.

Logan, along with the twins, watched the four of them skate for the better part of an hour, before the twins had enough and wanted to *do* something, too. She took each of them by the hand and went to tell Sheppard that she was taking them with her, admonishing him to remember that the other three were still there. She knew they were being carefully watched by the staff, allowing Sheppard to have a little fun on his own, without worrying about them, but she didn't want him to forget they were there.

After a quick snack of fruit and yogurt, Logan took the twins down to the marine research facility to let them "visit" with the dolphins for a little while. On their way, they ran into Mitchell and the twins immediately ran into his waiting arms.

"Hey!" he grinned, hugging them both close.

"Daddy see doffins?" they asked in unison.

"You're going to see the dolphins?" he asked.

They nodded vigorously, clearly excited. "Daddy come!" they insisted.

"Daddy might have to go back home and help Riateh with the babies, you two," Logan warned.

They looked up at him expectantly.

"Actually, Riateh is with Dr. Weir and Teyla right now, so she has all the help she needs, which means I think I can spare some time to go swim with the fish..." he trailed off, looking at Logan questioningly, along with the twins.

"We'd love to have you," she smiled.

"Yay!" the twins cried, clinging to him as they walked.

Mitchell carried one in each arm, chatting with them about the new skateboard park and wondering when they would be allowed to learn to ride, too. Mitchell rolled his eyes and looked over at Logan. He'd never been much of a rider himself, but he knew the Sheppard's had it in their blood.

Logan shrugged. "Chels was three, remember?"

He nodded. "I do. And I thought he was nuts for letting her ride that thing then."

Logan laughed. "I did, too. But he was very careful with her. And then..." she looked up at him accusingly. "I seem to remember another big lug who kept her on that board after John was gone..." she reminded him.

"She was already addicted to it, what was I supposed to do?" he asked defensively.

"Uh-huh...and now YOUR children are wanting to skate."

"Can we talk about it when they're three?"

"Deal," she agreed.

"Doffins!" the twins cried, pointing and waving excitedly.

Mitchell set them on their feet and they ran over to the observation window, immediately chattering away to the dolphins inside. Logan and Mitchell hung back to watch them for a few moments, smiling and shaking their heads.

"So...I hear that you and I are married in that other reality," Mitchell said bluntly.

"Apparently so," she smiled up at him.

"How about that?" he murmured absently.

"Interesting turn of events," she admitted.

"It's not going to last," he stated.

"What makes you so sure?" she asked.

"I don't know all the particulars, of course, but I think I can say with some authority that it only happened because John wasn't in the picture."

"You really think so?"

"Oh yeah," he nodded. "And judging by what I saw of THAT John Sheppard, how he looked at you - and the kids..."

"Cam..."

"She won't be able to resist," his tone was only slightly melancholy.

"You seem awfully sure about that."

He smiled warmly down at her, then bent to kiss her forehead. "The voice of experience, sweetheart. I'm sure he'll see it, too, when they're all together."

"You really believe that she'll just dump him like yesterday's garbage?" she asked sadly.

"No, no, hell no... But sooner or later, that pull is going to be too much for her. I'm sure they're as much a force of nature as you and John are together. THAT Cam Mitchell will see it, just like I did, and he'll do the right thing."

"Like you did?" she arched an eyebrow at him.

"Yep. I don't suppose that one of the gate addresses you gave them was for Riateh's homeworld?"

She blushed furiously. "Actually, John gave it to them while he was there."

Mitchell laughed out loud. "Of course he did."

"We both want you to be happy, Cam, in every reality."

He hugged her close. "And I am, very happy, thank you."

"Come swim!" the twins called to them.

"Okay, okay, you little sea-monkeys, keep your shirts on!" Mitchell replied.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

"So what was it like?" McKay asked curiously.

Sheppard put his fork down and looked wearily up at McKay. He'd known the questions would inevitably come, but he hadn't really had a chance to rest properly since returning home. Of course, much of that was due to the fact that he couldn't seem to get enough of his wife, but that was another story altogether.

"Well, I can honestly say, and I mean this from the bottom of my heart, I really missed you, Rodney."

McKay's face brightened for a moment before a shadow fell across his features. "Wait...Wasn't I...The other Sheppard said I was there..."

"Oh, you were...sort of."

"What does that mean?" he asked defensively.

"Let's just say that he was a pale imitation of the Rodney McKay WE all know and love," Sheppard flashed him one of his patented half-grins.

"Thank you. I think. What do you mean?"

"Well, I mean, think about the circumstances. Once they lost Atlantis, that McKay didn't have all the resources you do. He didn't have the supplies and equipment or the caliber of people at his disposal that you do here. Don't get me wrong, he was still brilliant and everything, but..."

"But what?" McKay still sounded defensive.

"Come on, Rodney, take a compliment when one is offered," Sheppard shook his head.

"A compliment? How is that a compliment?" McKay huffed.

"I'm telling you that YOU are a much better Rodney McKay than the one in that other reality."

Apparently the idea that ANY McKay was less than a paragon of ingenuity and brilliance in every reality didn't sit well with him.

"Oh," was all he could manage in response.

"You ARE the one who came up with the way to get us home, aren't you?"

McKay shrugged. "Well, yes."

"Okay. And you figured out that if we missed that first planet we could catch up to it on one of the other ones and sent that information back with them?"

"Yes."

"Well, the other McKay didn't."

"Are you saying he couldn't?"

"No...Well, yeah. He didn't have the Ancient database to work with. Nor did he have your razor sharp wit," he added. "He wasn't nearly as much fun as you are."

McKay studied him for a moment, unsure as to whether or not Sheppard was being completely sincere.

"Seriously Rodney. I'm REALLY glad that YOU'RE the one on my team instead of him."

"Oh. Then...thank you. We missed you, too."

"Good to know. Thank YOU, Rodney, AGAIN, for finding a way to save the day...AGAIN."

"You're welcome," McKay finally managed to smile. "So, uh...I understand they have a Sumner there still."

"Yes, they do."

"That must have been...weird...for you."

"It was a little surreal, yes. It was also my first clue that we weren't in Kansas anymore."

"Then you caught on a lot quicker than we did," McKay smiled.

"So I hear. I gather THAT Sheppard didn't let on right away that he didn't belong here?"

"No. But from what I hear, he didn't really know what was going on, at first. He thought it was all some elaborate hallucination or something, he and Lorne both. You know, kind of like what we went through when we thought we went back to Earth but it was all a figment of our own imaginations?"

"Right. That's what Logan said," Sheppard winced.

"You know that she knew something was off right away. I mean, she could sense it."

Sheppard nodded. He'd expected nothing less.

"I'll never forget the sight of her marching him to the infirmary at gunpoint, er, zat-point actually...Anyway, we all thought she'd lost her mind, or that you'd done something monumentally stupid..."

"She thought he was an imposter," Sheppard stated.

"Yeah. But when all the test results showed that he WAS, in fact, John Sheppard...She didn't know what to think."

"I'm just sorry she had to go through that," Sheppard said sadly.

"Yeah. It was hard, but Logan's a rock, you know that. She was on me ALL THE TIME about finding a way to get you back. She really held it together - for the kids, for the rest of us...You know, I've always been a little envious of the bond you two share. How well you really do know each other."

"Don't you and Carter have that kind of bond?" he asked.

McKay laughed out loud at that. "Hardly. I mean, don't get me wrong, I think we have a pretty tight relationship, but you and Logan...It's like you're actually a part of each other, physically. Anyone else, they never would have been able to tell that HE wasn't YOU...I mean the RIGHT you, of course.

"Of course."

"I just...I think it's great, that's all. I wish that was the kind of relationship I had with Samantha."

"Thanks, Rodney. It DOES help that we've known each other literally all our lives, of course."

"I'm sure that's part of it, but I think, we ALL think it's something much deeper than that."

"Seriously?" Sheppard seemed pleased by that.

"It's like you were made, specifically, for each other. Like... destiny or something. It's nice. Now how many couples can you say that about?"

"Not many, I suppose," Sheppard admitted.

He knew exactly what McKay was saying. It was something he and Logan had known for a long time. They WERE made for each other, and neither one of them would ever be completely happy without the other. For some reason, he actually found it nice that other people recognized it, too, and even envied it. Of course, he never thought Rodney McKay would be one who would recognize it, but then again, thinking back, McKay had done a lot of growing in the time since he'd come to Atlantis. There had been a time, for a while there, when he could never have imagined McKay as a close friend, and now their relationship was almost brotherly. He wasn't nearly as close to him as he was to Mitchell, but he did count McKay as one of his most trusted friends.

ONE MONTH LATER - ATLANTIS

She watched covertly from the observation room above the classroom wing in Atlantis. It hadn't taken her long to pick out the three children she'd come to see. Three perfect, miniature versions of John Sheppard. Even though Chelsea, the oldest, so closely resembled him, it was the two boys, Nic and Tommy, who were exact replicas of Sheppard at their respective ages. Logan sighed, remembering perfectly the little boy John Sheppard had been back then. The photographs she had seen of Chelsea didn't quite do her justice. She was a stunningly beautiful, feminine version of her father. Sheppard's masculine features were softened in her, more delicate. She instantly fell in love with all three of them. She wanted to stay and watch them all day, but she was under a time limit, and she still had more to see.

Slipping cautiously out, she made her way down the hall, managing to avoid being seen by anyone, and made her way to the nursery/daycare section. Again, luck was with her as she found no one in the observation room. She would be able to observe the twins without anyone knowing she was there. And again, it didn't take long for her to pick them out among the other toddlers in the room. Scotty was, like the other children, a perfect smaller version of his father, Cameron Mitchell. Little Cadence was also easy to spot, as she looked exactly like herself at that age. As with the older three children, Logan instantly fell in love with the twins.

She stayed for as long as she dared, then reluctantly slipped out and began making her way stealthily through the halls. She was nearly clear of the nursery wing, when two small bodies appeared from a restroom doorway directly in her path, followed by the attendant she'd seen watching over them.

"Mama!" they cried in unison, launching themselves into her arms.

"Oh, Colonel Devane, we weren't expecting you," Juna said.

Logan hugged the two small bodies against her and knelt down to their level. "I was...just passing through," she explained.

"We'll be reading a story soon, you're more than welcome to join us."

"I'd love to, but unfortunately, duty calls," she sighed. "I'm very happy I ran into you though," she said to the twins. "Can you give Mama a hug to get me through the day?" she asked.

Her heart melted as the twins hugged her fiercely, then placed a wet sloppy kiss on either side of her cheeks. She held on, breathing in their scent, reluctant ever to let them go, but she knew she had to.

"Love you Mama," they chorused together.

She smiled as she remembered how she and John had developed the habit, early on in their lives of talking in stereo, and finishing each others sentences and thoughts.

"Mama loves you, too, sooooo much," she murmured softly, planting a kiss on each downy-soft head of hair. "You guys have a good day."

She held back the tears as she watched them obediantly follow their caretaker back to the daycare. It wasn't that she hadn't believed Sheppard when he told her how he'd instantly fallen in love with the children, even the twins who were not biologically his own but, hearing about it and experiencing it for oneself were two entirely different things. That was just one of the reasons she was so determined to come and see all of them for herself.

After they'd gone and the hallway was clear again, she made directly for the wing where Logan, Sheppard and the children were quartered. She had to stop and hide several times, to avoid being seen again, but she managed to make it almost all the way there without incident until she heard a familiar voice. Cam! She jumped quickly behind a large potted plant in the hallway and crouched down to hide. He was walking slowly up the hallway, accompanied by a lovely woman. Each of them were carrying a baby in their arms, and were gazing adoringly at one another and at the infants. She felt a small pang of not-quite-jealousy as Mitchell lowered his face to hers and gave her a lingering kiss. They appeared to be very much in love which, at once, made her both sad and hopeful at the same time.

When she was sure they had gone, Logan hurried down the hall and found the quarters she'd been looking for. She entered without hesitation, as it didn't matter now if either Sheppard or Logan were inside. Both would understand her need to come here. She was dismayed to discover that no one was home, however. She took a few minutes to study the photographs on the walls and layout of the home her counterpart shared with Sheppard. Everything she saw definitely had her stamp on it, nicely inter-mixed with Sheppard's taste. It all blended perfectly together - as she should have expected.

She explored each of the bedrooms, alternately smiling or laughing at what she found. They had a good life here. Not because it was Atlantis, but because it was so clear that everything fit. Kismet. Destiny. All of it was meant to be. How had they gotten to this place, though? Her last stop was Logan and Sheppard's bedroom. The decor was warm and inviting and, again, a perfect blending of their individual tastes. Her eyes stopped on the king-sized bed, and her imagination went, unbidden, to the pleasures they had to have shared in that bed. It was so easy, now, for her imagination to take her there, since she'd met up with this John Sheppard and learned about the course their life had taken since coming here. Before that, she had barely ever entertained the notion of she and Sheppard as a couple - though it had crossed her mind over the years.

The sudden, unmistakable sound of a zat being activated snapped her out of her reverie. She froze and raised her hands over her head.

"Turn around," she heard a familiar voice order.

She immediately complied, keeping her hands in the air, and came face to face with the person she had come to speak to.

Logan gasped and took a step backward, still keeping her zat aimed at...well...herself.


	92. Chapter 92

"Hello Logan," the newcomer said.

"Hello yourself. Er, uh, _myself_..." she looked at her in confusion.

"I didn't come to hurt anyone," the newcomer began.

Logan couldn't shake the surreal feeling surrounding her as she looked at her own face and heard her own voice talking back to her. It was...odd...to say the least.

"Okay... Explain," she prodded.

"I came from the same reality your husband traveled to a few months ago..."

"Not by choice," Logan muttered.

"Right."

She studied the alternate version of herself for a moment. "Kinda mucked things up for you, did he?" Logan asked knowingly.

"Bit of an understatement, that. Can we talk without the zat?" her double asked, eyes glued to the zat in Logan's hand.

Logan looked at it, as though she'd forgotten she was holding it. "Oh, sure," she said absently, holstering it and motioning to her double to put her hands down.

"Thanks," smiled Logan 2.0 in relief.

"You bet. So, you came to see for yourself that everything they told you is true," it wasn't a question.

Her double smiled at her good-naturedly. "You know me too well," she quipped.

"Good one," Logan admitted, a smile of amusement lighting her face.

"If you do say so yourself?"

Both of them burst out laughing. It broke some of the tension and absurdity they felt at talking to their own mirror image.

"Okay, seriously, I know you're running on a time limit here, so what do you want to know?" Logan asked.

"I wanted to see the children, for myself, for one thing."

"And did you?" Logan arched an eyebrow at her.

Her double smiled and her expression softened. "Yes, I did. I'm sorry, I kind of ran into the twins by accident. They're fine, they didn't know anything was off and it was just for a minute."

Logan nodded.

"They're all so beautiful, the pictures don't really do them justice," her counterpart beamed.

Logan cringed at her mention of the pictures.

"That was your idea, wasn't it? The pictures?"

Logan nodded again. "Sorry about that, but I knew you'd want to... see them."

Her double nodded, too. "Thank you for that."

"Even though it helped you to question everything you thought you knew about yourself?" Logan winced again.

"Yep."

"So, how's all of that going?" Logan asked.

"Do you really need to ask?" her double groaned.

"Well, there are some differences between what I went through and what you're going through. John told me he filled you in on the time he was presumed dead."

Her counterpart nodded. "That had to be excruciating for you."

Logan shrugged, a frown forming on her face. "It was."

"But when he came back...How did you...What were you... Cameron..."

Logan held up a hand. "Actually, it wasn't an issue. Cam stepped back long before John returned. I was so mortified about... what happened between us. I felt just... so awful about using Cam that way - even after all that time, I couldn't let go of John. Add a whole lot of booze and my inner-floozy came out..." she trailed off, a pained expression on her face. "He was hurt, but he was still so great to me, and the kids; always so supportive... Anyhoo, he knew that we could never be. That I would always belong to John, dead or alive. He steadfastly remained my friend and Uncle to the kids, but he started to put any romantic feelings aside from that day forward; even when I turned up pregnant with the twins..." she trailed off and looked over at her counterpart. "But John and I had already built a life together, and a family, YOU hadn't. YOU built a life with Cam before you knew any of this, so..."

"So how can I be so completely miserable and confused about what to do? How can I suddenly miss and want something I never even had?" her double finished for her.

Logan nodded sympathetically. If anyone could understand, she could.

"I don't know. Maybe just having my eyes opened to what it is YOU and John have - seeing the possibilities - I don't know. I saw the look in YOUR John's eyes when he talked about you, and I see it in MY John's eyes every time he looks at me..." she trailed off sadly.

"And your heart begins to pound, your blood heats up..." Logan added.

"Just thinking about it..." her double finished for her.

"You've wondered before, about you and he maybe getting together," Logan noted. She'd know that even if Sheppard hadn't told her.

She nodded.

"Look, I can't tell you what to do, or who to love..." Logan shrugged.

"No? And here I was hoping you'd make it easy for me," she quipped.

"HAH!" Logan snorted.

"There is something else I wanted to ask you about," her double began, her demeanor completely changed. "Afghanistan..."

Logan felt her stomach drop. She knew what was coming and she dreaded it. There were certain things about that whole experience that she had shared only with Sheppard. She hadn't even told the shrinks, or O'Neill, or even...

"Daniel, he... we... I was... when..." her double sighed, a pained expression on her face that matched Logan's.

Logan held up a hand to stop her double. "I'm pretty sure I know where you're trying to go, so let me make it easier for you," she began. "As you've probably guessed, there's only one person I've ever told about everything I went through during that year..."

Her double listened and sympathized as Logan went through her own experiences as a prisoner in Afghanistan. As it happened, like with everything else up to that pivotal moment in Atlantis, their experiences had been virtually identical - every detail. It was hard to go through it all again, but made easier by the fact that she was pretty much recounting it all to someone who'd been through the exact same thing. Painful still, but not as hard as it could have been.

"I'm sorry to dredge all this up again for you, I just.. I had no one else to talk to. I haven't told anyone all of it - not even John or Cam."

"No need to be sorry..." she trailed off as she heard Sheppard come in the front door. "But, about the other stuff? Cam and John? Maybe a demonstration will help. You game?"

She nodded, allowing Logan to take her by the hand and sit her on the end of the bed before taking a seat right by her side. A moment later, Sheppard came into the room, her name dying on his lips.

"Lo..." he called, trailing off as he saw the two of them seated side-by-side. "And I haven't even had anything to drink," he quipped, rubbing his eyes.

They smiled up at him without saying a word.

"Who gets to go first?" he asked, hoping for an explanation.

When neither of them spoke, he shrugged and then came over to stand before them. Looking them both up and down, he studied them carefully, first her double and then her. As his eyes met and locked on Logan's, a small smile crept over his lips.

"There you are," he murmured, taking her hands in his and pulling her to her feet.

His arms came around and engulfed her, pulling her against him. Tilting her head up, her lips met his in a searing kiss.

"Okay, so what have we learned here?" Sheppard asked, somewhat breathless.

He and Logan turned to look down at a now red-faced Logan-double. "Uh... What I came here to learn."

"Which was?" he prodded, though he already knew.

"That Logan Devane and John Sheppard belong together. In every reality," she admitted sadly but resolutely.

They looked at her sympathetically, each understanding the pain she was in.

"No arguments here," Sheppard said. "How...uh...did HE take it when he found out about you and Cameron?"

She winced, pausing before answering. "YOU should know."

"That bad, huh?" Sheppard cringed.

"He was... disappointed, but he tried to hide it. He didn't try to make any demands, or lay claim..." she replied.

"And Cam?" he asked.

"He, uh, actually, he did exactly what your Cameron did. He stepped aside. He's letting me work through my feelings. No pressure, no judgment..."

"I kinda figured he would," they replied in unison.

"And now you feel like the most selfish creature in two universes for wanting to be with John, but not wanting to hurt Cam," Logan added.

"Yep."

"So you came to see for yourself what it is the two of you could have if you allowed it." Sheppard guessed.

"Yep."

"And?" they again said in unison.

"I want what you two have," she replied simply and honestly.

"Then you know what you have to do," Logan said bluntly.

She nodded. "Yes, I do."

"Wait a minute, exactly how DID you get here?" Sheppard asked.

She smiled sheepishly. "The Quantum mirror."

"The mirror? But how did you find the right alternate reality?" Logan asked.

"We've, uh, become quite adept at using it. Sam studied it extensively and she showed me how to use it, how to find a specific reality..."

"But without the controller..."

"OUR Daniel brought it back with him, didn't yours...?"

"No, he couldn't."

"Oh. Well, anyway, my John told me you guys had yours brought here, hoping to find a way to send him back and retrieve, uh, YOUR John, and where you'd stored it. It was easier to find than I thought it would be. I have the controller, but Colonel Caldwell is keeping the door open for me, so to speak."

Logan smiled. "He didn't give you a hard time about doing this?"

"Course he did, but he knows how stubborn I can be."

Logan chuckled. "He's a good man."

"Yes he is."

"Alright, alright you two, knock it off," Sheppard grumbled.

"How long have you been here?" Logan asked.

"A few hours, I need to get back before the tremors start."

"Tremors?" Sheppard asked, confused.

"Entropic cascade tremors," Logan explained. "Something to do with the same matter occupying the same space, Rodney can explain it to you."

"Pass," Sheppard rolled his eyes. "Are you ready to go? That tremor thing sounds pretty bad."

"It is," both Logan's replied in unison.

"Hey, stereo!" he quipped.

"Funny," they murmured together.

"Yeah, well, we better get you back before something goes wrong.

They escorted her to the storage room where their Quantum Mirror was kept and wished her well. She was surprised to see an S.O. standing watch where she had left Caldwell before, but a quick check of the controller confirmed that it was still on and set to the correct reality.

"He must have been called away," she murmured.

"Probably. Say hi to John for us," Logan smiled warmly at her double.

"I will," she said, returning the smile.

"Be happy," Sheppard gave her a quick hug before stepping back to let her touch the mirror.

TWO WEEKS LATER

A very tipsy Logan was escorted to her quarters by O'Neill and Caldwell. Sheppard gaped at them as they put Logan into his capable hands.

"Hope you don't mind that we borrowed your wife wishout permishion, shon!" O'Neill said unapologetically.

"Uh, as long as you brought her back, sir..." he stammered, completely taken aback.

"I think that woman could drink ush both unner the table, given the schance."

"She might, sir," Sheppard grinned. "Sorry I missed the party."

"Private party, son. Jush ush three," he informed him while holding up five fingers. "Maybe nexsht time."

"I look forward to that, sir. Where you headed now?" Sheppard asked, unsure that the two of them would make it across the hall, let alone to either of their quarters.

"Cadwell here needsh to get back to hish wife...Sho do I for that matter, but she's in a whole 'nother galaxy," he slurred.

"Need an escort, sir?"

"Nah!" O'Neill tried to wink at him. "I know the way. I'm taking Cadwell back to his quartersh and then he'sh takin me to mine."

"Okay then, sir, if you're sure..." Sheppard said uncertainly.

"Coursh he'sh shure," Logan hiccupped. "He's Genra Jack O'Neill - Goa'uld-bushter exshtraordinaire!" she giggled.

"Shee ya kidsh," O'Neill waved as he and Caldwell began weaving their way down the hall.

Mitchell happened to be passing by as they left and he looked at Sheppard, holding a very unsteady Logan, curiously.

"I'll explain later, you wanna follow them and make sure they get back to their quarters without incident?" Sheppard asked.

"Sure," Mitchell smiled in amusement, stopping long enough to give Logan a quick peck on the cheek.

"Get 'em, get 'em, get'em, Shpace Cowboy!" she taunted Mitchell.

"When I come back, I want whatever she had," Mitchell told Sheppard.

Sheppard smiled and replied, "Me, too."

"Nononono," Logan giggled. "Shomeone hash to be deshinated pilot," she reminded him.

"Uh-huh..." he closed the door and guided her into the living room. "Sparks, we're already home."

"Oh!" she looked around. "That wash fasht!"

Sheppard shook his head, grinning in spite of himself. It wasn't often she could cut loose like this. And after what she'd been through in the last 48 hours, she _needed_ to blow off some steam.

"So...Drinking with the Generals... How did that happen?" he asked.

"We wersh shelebrating!" she announced.

"Really? Okay...What?" he blinked at her.

"What, what?" she asked.

"What were you celebrating?" he chuckled.

"Oh...Pophish...ish...dead!" she announced gleefully. "Again."

"Sounds like as good a reason as any to have a few," he nodded. More than a few, it would seem.

"An when Genra Jack is buyin, you can't shay no!" she explained.

"That's true. So what were you drinking?"

"Shampagne...mostly...But Shteve had this great big bottle of Danels he was shavin for a shpeshal 'ccasion..."

"Oh, that's a nice combination," he cringed. Not really.

"Know whut else?" she grinned sloppily at him.

"What?" he smiled down at her.

"I wuv you, fy-boy..."

"Know what?" he winked at her.

"Hmmm?" she grinned happily.

"I love you, too."

"Good! Now, give ush a big, soppy kish, fy-boy," she demanded, puckering up as she closed her eyes.

"A soppy one, eh?" he arched an eyebrow at her upturned face.

"Yesh! And hurry up! I mished you today..."

Sheppard did as commanded, getting a taste of the Jack Daniels she'd been drinking as he did so. She was going to hate herself in the morning.

"Lesh get nekkid," she said abruptly, reaching for the zipper on her uniform shirt.

"But, Cam's coming back, sweetie," he reminded her.

Logan pulled her shirt off, then started on her pants. "But..." she blinked, confused. "He can't be here when we're having sexsh," she protested.

"Is that what we're doing?" he chuckled as she kicked her pants off.

"Yesh...I told you, I wuv you... an I mished you."

"Yes, you did..." he nodded.

"So off wish the jeansh, shtud!" she ordered.

At that moment, there was a brisk knock at the door. Mitchell, no doubt.

"Oh, POOP!" she said, two octives higher than her normal tone.

"Come're," Sheppard said, scooping her into his arms and carrying her to their room.

He set her gently on the bed. "Wait right here, okay?"

"Okey-dokey-pokey," she murmured, falling backwards onto the bed with a giggle.

Sheppard grinned and closed the door behind him. When he opened the front door, he saw Mitchell standing there, shaking his head and grinning fron ear-to-ear.

"Man, if we ever need blackmail ammo, we got some today!" he chuckled.

"That bad?" Sheppard asked.

"I'll tell you about it tomorrow. How's Logan?" he asked.

"Toasted. Completely wasted. And she'll be hating herself in the morning."

"Poor thing. Listen, I just came by to check on her, I gotta get back to Ri and the girls. Call me if you need anything?"

"You bet. Logan'll probably be passed out by the time I get back in there."

They said their goodnights, and Sheppard made his way through their quarters, turning off lights as he went.

THE FOLLOWING MORNING - SHEPPARD QUARTERS

Mitchell was filling Sheppard in on everything he'd missed while walking Caldwell and O'Neill to their respective quarters the night before. The sight of O'Neill and Caldwell weaving (or rather stumbling) their way through the hallways of Atlantis was forever etched in Mitchell's memory. The two men, who were obviously very good friends outside of work, just as he and Sheppard were, were cracking on one another as they played an impromptu game of one-upsmanship the likes of which he'd never seen before in all his years of military service.

Once it got down to actually showing one another their battle scars, however, Mitchell had to step in. Both men had discarded their shirts and were busily pointing out various scars and O'Neill was about to drop his pants to show Caldwell the scars on his knees, from the surgeries he'd had to have, when Mitchell amiably strolled up and interrupted them.

"Hey there, Generalissimos!"

"Mishhell!" they chorused together.

"Getting ready to take a swim?" he asked non-chalantly.

"Schwim?!" O'Neill gave him a disgusted look. "It'sh freeshing out there, are you nutsh?"

"Possibly, sir," he smiled, handing O'Neill his shirt.

"Where'd you get that?" O'Neill looked at him fuzzily.

"Found it on the floor, sir."

O'Neill arched an eyebrow at Caldwell. "You did that, didn't you Cadwell?"

"No...no...no...YOU did that, tryin to prove you have more shcarsh than me...Whish you don't."

Mitchell was struggling to keep a straight face, unsure just how much the two men would remember in the morning. He waited while they both shrugged back into their shirts, Caldwell putting his on inside-out.

"Any chance I can escort you two back to your quarters? I have a message for Lyta from Riateh," he lied.

"Eshcort HIM," O'Neill said. "Thash hish wife."

"Well, I need to escort you, too, sir. They reassigned you to better quarters," he lied again.

"Why?" O'Neill blinked.

"Cause we want only the best for our favorite visiting General," Mitchell smiled broadly.

O'Neill snorted. "HAH! You shee that Cadwell? *I* am the favrit Genra here!"

Caldwell rolled his eyes, almost falling over backwards in the process. "He shaid _VISHITING_ Genra, you egotishtical shon-of-a-peach!"

"ME egotishtical? What 'bout you?!" O'Neill countered.

"Generals, please. You know we love and respect you both," Mitchell interceded.

"Damn right you do!" they said in unison.

O'Neill paused, looking oddly at Caldwell and Mitchell.

"Sir?" Mitchell asked.

"Ish thish plash... Sheppard and hish wife... Now they hash _ME_ talking in chorush!" he started laughing, which made Caldwell start laughing.

"They do have an effect on everyone, sir," Mitchell acknowledged as he began steering them down the hall toward the transporter.

"Hey Mitchell... Did you know that thish guy, Cadwell... He almosht joined the Marinesh? I mean, come ON! _Marinesh_?!"

Mitchell looked over at Caldwell. "Say it isn't so, sir," he deadpanned.

"Ish true!" O'Neill insisted.

"My granfather wash a Marinesh!" Caldwell protested.

"Glad to see you overcame that tradition, sir," Mitchell said, maneuvering them both into the transporter.

By the time they reached the wing where Caldwell was quartered, both O'Neill and Caldwell were singing, loud and strong, a stirring rendition of "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall." Fortunately, They reached Caldwell's quarters without running into anyone. Lyta could hear them approaching and quickly answered the door to find them stumbling toward her.

"Lyta, good evening," Mitchell greeted. "Just delivering your husband, safe and sound," he explained sheepishly at the look on her face.

"What has happened to them?" she asked, having never seen Caldwell in such a state before.

"They were, uh..."

"Shelebrating!" O'Neill and Caldwell replied in unison.

"Celebrating?" she asked, looking at Mitchell.

He shrugged, unsure of what to say.

"To the death of the shnake!" they announced together.

"I see..." she managed a kind of half-smile. "Colonel Mitchell, I thank you for bringing my husband home."

"My pleasure, ma'am. If you'll excuse us, I need to show General O'Neill to his quarters, too."

"Of course."

"Good to shee you again, Mishush Cadwell. Yer lookin perty as ever!" O'Neill said.

"Thank you, General. Goodnight."

"G'night!" he replied.

Mitchell led him down to the end of the hall, to where his guest quarters were located.

"She's a perty lil thing, thash Mishush Cadwell... Not ash perty ash MY wife, of coursh, but Cadwell did a'right fer himshelf."

"Yes, he did, sir."

"An you, too Mishell! Married yershelf a right perty wommin, dint'cha?"

"I'm a lucky man, sir."

"Thash you are, son. Damn lucky," O'Neill agreed.

"Yes, sir."

"Sheppard, too...Thash boy's charmed, I tell ya!"

"Yes, he is, sir."

**Sheppard was laughing almost as hard as Mitchell by the time he was done telling the story.. They were trying to keep the noise level down, to avoid waking Logan. She, however, was already beginning to wake up.

She moaned softly and put her hands to her head. "Oh God," she muttered to herself. "Who parked a semi on my head?"

It took her a few minutes to get up the courage to try and open her eyes, and she was instantly sorry that she had. Sheppard had drawn the drapes, to keep out as much light as possible, but it was still too bright for her sensitive eyes to handle. After another moment or two, she managed to focus on the nightstand next to her side of the bed. Sheppard had thoughtfully put out some water and some aspirin for her to find. Gingerly lifting her head from the pillow, swearing inwardly at the pounding in her head, she quickly downed the aspirin and laid her head back down on the pillow.

She could hear muffled voices coming from the other room, and correctly assumed it was Sheppard and Mitchell. Their laughter was what finally spurred her into forcing herself from bed. They were, no doubt, laughing at her, she thought. From the way she was feeling right now, she must have done something really stupid after drinking so much. Cursing herself inwardly for even thinking that a tiny, compact woman, such as herself could hold her own in a drinking contest with two over-six-footers, like Caldwell and O'Neill.

Well, she wasn't about to give them the satisfaction of holding this over her head. Forcing herself to stand and walk across the room, she made her way into their private bathroom and turned on the shower. Every movement, every noise was torture, but Logan was determined to put on an unaffected front to the two laughing apes in the other room.

Freshly showered, and slightly less blinded from pain, Logan put on a smile and bravely emerged from the bedroom. Sheppard and Mitchell instantly quieted when they saw her. She waved in greeting and headed straight for the kitchen and a cup of steaming, hot coffee. They watched her as she gingerly retrieved a mug from the cupboard and poured herself some of the steaming brew. She winced slightly as the coffee hit her protesting stomach and threatened to come back up again. She fought down a momentary wave of nausea, all the while managing to keep a smile on her face. Sheppard and Mitchell exchanged a knowing glance, and kept their expressions as neutral as they could.

"Morning sweetheart," Sheppard ventured.

"Morning," she managed to make that sound halfway human.

"Whatcha up to?" he asked breezily.

"Things to do, darlin," she came over to kiss him lightly on the head. "Morning, Cam," she said, kissing him as well.

"Good morning," he smiled, trying to keep his voice low.

"See you guys later," she said, taking her coffee and heading for the door.

"Uh, Sparks?" Sheppard called out tentatively, getting up off the sofa.

She winced once, composed herself and turned toward him. "Yes?"

"Hon, where are you going?" Sheppard asked incredulously.

"I told you, I have things to do."

"But...Are you sure...?" he stammered.

"Sure that I have things to do? Yes."

"No, I mean... Are you sure you want to go out?" he clarified for her.

"I'm sure I _need_ to. Why?" she asked sweetly.

"Why? Sparks...Uh, you sure you're up to it?" he asked, his eyes wide in wonder.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I be?" she asked, her face a mask of bewildered ignorance.

Sheppard quickly stole a glance at Mitchell who was shaking his head vehemently.

"Uh, just thought you might be feeling a little..." Mitchell shook his head harder. "Tired..." Sheppard finished for him.

"Nope. See ya!" she said breezily and kissed him again before sashaying out of the room.

Both men stared at the door after she left for a long moment before saying anything. Concern warred with admiration, but admiration won out.

"Damn," Mitchell murmured.

"Yeah," Sheppard agreed.

"I swear, that woman can accomplish more through sheer force of will than anyone can with anything else," Mitchell stated.

"Yeah," Sheppard repeated.

"I'm not gonna laugh at HER..." Mitchell looked askance at Sheppard. "You?"

"Hell no!" Sheppard quickly replied.

Logan steadied herself in the transporter, bracing herself for the lurch her stomach would experience as soon as the thing began to move. She was determined, however, not to let the effects of her overindulgence last night show, to ANYONE.

Her first stop was the infirmary. She'd gone there intending to see Caldwell 2.0, but since she was there, she decided to help herself to a dose of Compazine, to help settle her increasingly rebellious stomach. Beckett saw her down the dosage but, fully aware of what had gone on the night before (having been called in the middle of the night to Caldwell's quarters) he decided not to say anything to her about it.

He smiled and began filling her in on the alternate Caldwell's medical condition, expressing deep concern that he didn't have long to live, unless someone came to retrieve him soon. Logan sat by the head of his bed, and took his large hand in hers. Seeing him like this was difficult for her, but she didn't want him to be alone - HER Caldwell or not. She reached out and began gently caressing his forehead and face, whispering words of encouragement as she willed him the strength to hold on.

Caldwell 2.0... It was no wonder he wasn't waiting at the mirror when Logan 2.0 had gone back. He'd come through at some point while she'd been visiting - and he hadn't been alone. Within him, he'd carried the Goa'uld known as Apophis.


	93. Chapter 93

Logan sat with Caldwell 2.0 for the better part of an hour before he finally began to stir. She quickly checked all the monitors attached to him, as well as his vitals, to make sure he was still stable, then softly called to him.

"Hey there, can you hear me, Colonel?" she asked.

He let out a soft groan.

"Come on, Steve, open your eyes for me," she gently encouraged him.

He groaned again, but this time he moved his head from side to side.

"Atta boy, come back to us now," she cooed.

"Logan," he croaked hoarsely.

"That's right, I'm here. Open your eyes."

"Dream," he croaked again.

"No, Steve, you're not dreaming, and everything's okay now," she murmured, wishing she could be as certain of that as she sounded.

"Logan...?"

"Hi there handsome," she smiled down at him as his eyelids fluttered open.

She was squeezing his hand, all the while whispering words of encouragement. He stared up at her, unable to focus clearly for a moment. "Logan?" he asked, still somewhat confused.

"Yes."

"What happened?" he asked, squeezing her hand in return.

"Well, THAT'S a very long story. What do you remember?" she asked, her smile firmly in place.

"Waiting for you by that..." his eyes widened and he gasped, looking around wildly and trying to sit up..

"I take it that it's all coming back to you?" she asked.

"Oh God!" he gasped. "Logan...I...I..."

"Shhhhhh," she whispered, pressing him back down against the pillow. "It's over now. Everything is alright, I promise." she assured him.

"But, he...he tried to..."

"Yes, he TRIED to do a lot of things, but he didn't succeed, and now he's gone."

"I'm...sorry..." his eyes were filled with pain and guilt.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," she said soothingly. "It was Apophis, not YOU."

"I never should have let..."

"You didn't. In fact, if it hadn't been for you fighting so hard for control, he very may well have succeeded in what he was trying to do."

He studied her face carefully. "Not my Logan..."

She shook her head negatively. "No. You're still in MY reality, Steve, I'm sorry."

"Sorry?"

"For what it's doing to your body. Being here, with OUR Steven Caldwell is exacting quite a toll."

"Oh."

"I wish we could send you back ourselves, but we don't have one of those controllers for the mirror. Rodney is trying to rig something, but he hasn't had much luck so far."

"I'm not surprised," Caldwell snorted.

She stifled a chuckle. "No, OUR Rodney McKay has had several advantages over yours, so he's actually a bit more... advanced... shall we say?"

"Okay..." he grunted, not fully convinced.

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

"Like I've been run over by a truck," he replied grimly.

"Hmmm...Me, too, though not for the same reasons."

He looked horrified. "Did I...hurt..."

"No, no, no...I uh, that is WE, the Generals O'Neill and Caldwell and I, did a little too much celebrating last night."

He looked at her in disbelief.

"Don't look so surprised!" she admonished. "I'm sure you are as close to your Logan as I am to OUR Caldwell."

He shook his head. "I wouldn't be too sure about that. What were you celebrating?"

"The death of Apophis," she said simply.

"How?"

"Champagne, to start with, then we moved on to the hard stuff."

He couldn't hold back a chuckle. "No! I mean how did he... die?"

"Oh, THAT," she blushed prettily. "The same way he killed Farrell, one of my S.O.'s."

Caldwell searched his memory for the man she called Farrell, recoiling in horror as he saw himself point the zat at him and squeeze the trigger three times.

"That wasn't you, Steve."

He shook his head, jaw clenching tightly. "Right."

"Anyway, he's dead, we partied, and now we have to find a way to get you back home before..." she trailed off, unable to say the words.

"Before these tremors kill me."

"Right."

He paused to study her face again. "It's hard to tell the two of you apart."

"Not really. I'm a Colonel, she's a Lt. Colonel," she quipped.

"Other than that," he rolled his eyes.

"I'm a mother of five, she doesn't have any kids," Logan added.

"You don't look like the mother of five kids," he said appraisingly.

"Thank you. But, tell that to my kids when I'm harranguing them to clean their rooms."

He chuckled softly. "I don't imagine they give you much trouble."

"That, my dear, would be a huge failure of imagination on your part," she chuckled.

"Oh really?" he grinned.

"They're too much like their father...s...fatherS. You know them both, so I'm sure you know what I'm talking about."

He nodded. "I don't know Sheppard all that well, but I can see what you mean about Mitchell."

"But YOUR kids," she began, her eyes sparkling. "They are extremely well-behaved."

His eyes softened and turned wistful. "I always wanted to have kids."

"You still can..."

At that moment, there was a knock at the door and Lyta meekly poked her head inside.

"Am I interrupting?" she asked.

"Not at all. In fact, your timing couldn't have been better," Logan assured her.

"Lyta Caldwell, allow me to introduce COLONEL Steven Caldwell, from the other reality. Steve, this is Lyta, of Athos."

"It is a pleasure to meet you, though I feel as though I already have," Lyta blushed. It was a very odd feeling talking to a man who was and was not her husband at the same time.

"The pleasure's all mine," he smiled warmly at her.

"My husband wanted to come and check on you himself but, (looking pointedly at Logan) he is feeling a bit indisposed this morning."

Logan blushed, but kept an innocent smile plastered on her face. Caldwell forced himself not to burst into laughter at the way Lyta silently scolded Logan for her part in her husband's indisposition.

"I am relieved to see that you are recovering from your ordeal," Lyta continued.

"Thank you," he smiled warmly.

"I will leave you to rest now. It was very nice to meet you."

As she turned to go, Logan called out to her. "Lyta?"

"Yes?"

"Do you happen to have any pictures of the children with you?"

Lyta looked down at the small bag she was carrying. "I do indeed."

"I thought the Colonel here might want to see them," she suggested.

Caldwell looked surprised but eager to accept the thoughtful suggestion. "Yes...Please?"

Lyta fished through her bag and came up with a handful of photographs. "This is Torus, our oldest. My husband is not his father by birth, but by deed. And this is Samuel, named for..."

"My brother," Caldwell gasped.

"Yes. I did not give birth to him, but I have raised him since he was a tiny baby."

They both noticed Logan look quickly away, at the mention of Sam's birth mother, in an effort to hide the flash of pain in her eyes. Caldwell wondered about that, but didn't say anything.

"And this, is Riley," she said handing him the last photograph.

Caldwell looked surrepticiously at Logan, knowing that Riley was her middle name and wondering at the coincidence. He could see the resemblance to his side of the family in the younger children, but they mainly appeared to take after their respective mothers.

"They're...amazing," he said, awe-stricken.

"We think so," Lyta beamed proudly.

"Thank you, for showing them to me."

"You are welcome. I must go now. I hope you are feeling better soon."

He smiled warmly and watched her walk out the door. "She is... very lovely."

"Yes, she is. So...any plans to go to Athos when you get back?" she teased.

"Was that your plan by having her show me pictures of the children?"

She blushed again. "Did it work?"

"I'll let you know!" he grunted non-committally. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"How did he end up being married three times?"

A brief flash of pain came across her eyes again. "Well...Where to start...Uh, your brother, Sam...After he passed away, you promised, or rather HE promised to look after Shannon."

"As did I," Caldwell interjected.

"Right. Well, you, uh...Ended up marrying Shannon."

"What?!"

"I take it you didn't follow the same road?"

"No! She's married to some pharmaceutical salesman in Des Moines now."

"Ah...Well, since you didn't come to Pegasus and stay here, I guess there was no reason..." she shrugged. "Anyway, Shannon was Sam's birth mother."

"Was?"

"Yes. She uh...She died just after giving birth to him, following a crash in one of the jumpers...Long story."

"You were friends."

"I...Yes."

"I can see the pain in your eyes, still."

"I miss her very much. Sometime after that, you and Lyta got together and you adopted Torus."

"I see. And little Riley..." he began. "It's just a coincidence she has your middle name?"

"Not really. They did that when I was missing and presumed...lost."

"I hope you have time to tell me about THAT," he said.

Logan left the infirmary long enough to check on the new security measures she'd ordered put in place for the Quantum Mirror. In light of what had happened, they'd considered sending it back to Earth or simply destroying it, as Hammond suggested years earlier, but Logan had come up with another alternative. Shielding or "trapping" the storage room where it was kept.

This was something they'd seen done, in various ways, on other worlds over the years. She'd asked McKay and Carter to find a way to completely shield the storage room, thereby making it a trap for anyone or anything who came through that mirror. Once inside, an alarm would sound in the control room, alerting them to the new arrival and they'd be able to choose whether or not to allow the newcomer out of the room. This would secure Atlantis against any further foothold situations, and still allow them to keep the mirror.

Rodney had assured her that the shield/trap would be in place and fully functional by that evening. Sufficiently reassured, Logan returned to the infirmary to check on Caldwell 2.0's condition. She'd witnessed him endure two of those cascade tremors earlier, each one leaving him weaker and more debilitated. Now that Apophis was gone, and it was truly only Caldwell who was suffering, it tore her up to see him have to endure such agony.

Caldwell lay in bed, thinking about everything Logan had told him - and she HAD told him everything - at least about her relationship with this Caldwell. The parallels to his own reality had been virtually identical, right up to the time things went wrong (in his reality) for the Atlantis expedition. He and Logan had remained close, of course, but they had never gotten as close as they had in this reality.

The image of Caldwell's wife, Lyta flashed through his mind. She was very beautiful. Kind, shy, but he sensed a strength in her, hidden below the surface. His counterpart must have seen something in her, to have WANTED to marry her, rather than NEED to, as he had with Shannon. This Logan was practically begging him to go to Athos and find her in his reality, when he got back, and he found himself actually toying with the idea of doing that - IF - he got back. His Logan and Mitchell had broken up, but she was still not an option for him. Even if she never got together with Sheppard (something he highly doubted) she wouldn't be an option for him.

Logan returned to the infirmary just as Caldwell was thrown into another cascade tremor. This was a bad one, the worst yet. Beckett solemnly informed her that the next one might just kill him. He'd been left unconscious and his vital signs were extremely weak. She sat at the head of his bed, holding his hand and stroking his face, heartbroken over her inability to help him. Why hadn't they come for him? Why hadn't the other Logan figured out where he'd gone by now. He was almost out of time.

"I'm so sorry, Steve," she murmured to him. "I'm sorry I'm letting you down."

"Logan, darlin' you cannot take the blame upon yourself," Beckett told her.

"I feel like I should be DOING something for him, but there's nothing I can..." she trailed off suddenly. "Aaaarrrgh!" she growled.

"What is it, luv?" he asked, alarmed.

"There IS something I can do for him, Carson! Why didn't I think of it sooner?!" she mentally kicked herself in disgust.

As it dawned on him what she was talking about, his eyes widened in alarm. "No! Logan, darlin' you cannot stop the tremors, this is physics, not medicine!"

"I can't stop the tremors, but I can heal the effects of them!" she said resolutely.

"You don't know that!" he countered.

"I have to TRY!" she insisted.

Before he could even try to stop her, she placed one hand on his head and the other on his chest, Logan closed her eyes, took a few deep breaths, and mentally searched for the power she needed. A faint light began to glow beneath her hands and, almost instantly, Caldwell began to breathe easier. His vitals rapidly changed and improved. A few moments later, the light faded, then died, and Logan slumped forward, unconscious, across his chest.

"Holy crap," Beckett muttered.

He took a quick look at Caldwell's vitals, then picked Logan up and placed her on the bed next to his. He checked her breathing and vitals, to make sure she was just unconscious and not...worse. Then keyed his mic.

"Colonel Sheppard to the infirmary, please," he called out.

Caldwell stirred, then his eyes popped open. "Doctor Beckett?" he asked.

"Right here, Colonel, how are you feeling?" he asked.

"I feel... _fine_ ," he said, his eyes widening in surprise. "why do I feel fine?"

His eyes fell on Logan, lying in the next bed, and gasped, trying to get up.

"No. No. No, Colonel. You cannot be getting out of bed," Beckett pushed him back against the pillow.

"What happened to her?" he demanded.

"Logan is...special," Beckett stammered.

"Yes, Doctor, everyone knows that!" he said.

"No, I mean she's very S-P-E-C-I-A-L... Logan has the Ancient healing ability."

Caldwell looked at him in disbelief. "What?"

"She healed you, Colonel. At least as much as she's able to, given the toll those tremors have taken on your body."

"But... What did that do to her?" he asked, deeply troubled.

"Well, I won't lie to you, it takes a lot out of her to use that gift. She damn near killed herself, once, when she healed her whole family after they were infected by some space-virus."

"No! How could she do this...How could she risk..." Caldwell sputtered.

"You know what a deeply compassionate person she is, Colonel. She couldn't stand to watch you suffer. I might have suggested it earlier, myself, but I didn't think it would work."

They were interrupted by Sheppard bursting into the room at full speed. His eyes immediately drawn to Logan.

"What happened?" he demanded, going to her side and softly stroking her hair. "I knew she was too hungover to do anything today."

"It wasn't the hangover, son."

"What WAS it?" he asked, gritting his teeth.

Beckett pointed to an apparently more healthy-than-he-should-be-looking Colonel Caldwell.

Sheppard closed his eyes and silently cursed. "She did it again, didn't she?"

"Yep."

"And you didn't stop her?"

Beckett gave him a look. "You know your wife, John. There's no stopping her when she sets her mind to do something."

"That's for sure," Sheppard and Caldwell said in unison.

Sheppard looked down at him sheepishly. "Don't get me wrong, sir, it's not that I'd like to see you at death's door or anything."

"You just don't want HER there. I get it," Caldwell replied.

"How long has she been out?" Sheppard asked.

"A few minutes. I called you as soon as it happened. And, if you'll allow me, I don't want you to try and wake her up just yet..." Beckett said, fumbling through a nearby cabinet for something.

"Why?" Sheppard asked.

"Well, as you mentioned, she was suffering from a hangover already and, if she was as inebriated as the Generals were, I can't imagine how she was even able to function today - let alone have the strength she needed to heal the Colonel here. I want to try and ease her discomfort some before we try and wake her. You do realize she didn't want anyone to know how badly she was feeling, right?"

Sheppard nodded. "Yeah...I got that; when she got up and left this morning."

"Well then, this'll be our little secret. A little something to ease the pain and some vitamin supplements. I'll start an IV on her, to help with hydration, that's all. She never needs to know that WE know how bad off she really was."

Twenty minutes later, Logan's eyes fluttered open at the gentle, yet insistent call of her husband. "Come on baby, come back to me," he prodded.

"John?" she croaked.

"Very good. Now tell me how many fingers I'm holding up," he teased, displaying a peace-sign in front of her face.

"Two," she said rolling her eyes.

Funny, she thought, she was feeling better than she'd expected to after healing Caldwell. She gasped suddenly and bolted upright. She HAD managed to heal him, hadn't she? Panic and grief collided in her when she looked around and didn't see him. Then she realized she was in a private room.

"He's fine...Thanks to you," Sheppard scolded gently. "At least until the next tremor hits him anyway."

"Oh...Good!" She looked up at him meekly. "So, how mad ARE you?"

"I'm not mad, Sparks. I'm CONCERNED, but not mad. Why didn't you talk to me about this before you did that?"

She shrugged. "I just thought of it - I SHOULD have thought of it sooner but... I couldn't just let him die, John."

"I know, sweetheart, I know. But, you know that he'll keep experiencing those tremors over and over until they kill him or he's able to leave."

She nodded sadly. "I know. At least now he'll have the strength he needs to hold on a little longer. SOMEONE over there has GOT to figure it out soon and come looking for him."

"Uh-huh, and by someone you mean the other YOU, right?"

"Well, yeah...I mean, he was supposed to be there waiting for her when she got back, right? How hard can it be for her to put two and two together?"

"Well, yeah, but we don't know what Apophis did back there to cover his tracks."

"Steve knows."

"What?" Sheppard gasped.

"He remembers everything Apophis did after he took over his body."

Sheppard cringed. "Well _that_ can't be fun."

"Nope."

"So, what did he do, to cover his tracks, I mean?" Sheppard asked.

"He made it look like he was suddenly called back to Earth, so no one in Pegasus would be missing him."

"Someone should be missing him by now," Sheppard murmured.

"I'm saying!" she slapped him playfully on the arm.

"In any case, McKay and Carter are still working on rigging a controller for that mirror, so we may yet find a way to send him back ourselves."

"Um, Johnny?"

"Yes?"

"How long have I been out?"

"About twenty minutes. How are you feeling?" he asked tentatively.

"I feel fine, considering. A little tired."

He arched an eyebrow at her. "Considering...what? The energy you used up healing Caldwell, or your horrendous hangover?"

She glared at him menacingly. "The healing, flyboy. That usually takes a lot out of me."

"Uh-huh...And the hangover?"

"Shut up," she muttered.

"I'm not making fun of you, Sparks, honest. I don't know what you think you had to prove..."

Her eyes flashed angrily at him. "I HEARD you and Cam this morning, laughing it up. Do you really think I was going to give you two MORE ammunition?"

He paused, looking away a little guiltily. "Hey now, that's not fair, Sparks, we weren't even laughing at YOU!"

She looked in his eyes and saw that he was telling the truth. "No?"

"We were laughing at Caldwell and O'Neill."

"Why?" she thought back, trying to remember if either man had been sloppy drunk.

"They were pretty gone when they brought you back to our quarters, babe. I couldn't leave you and Cameron was there, so he made sure they got to their quarters. You know, neither one of them has shown their faces all day, so the fact that you even got out of bed is pretty amazing in itself."

She nodded. "Lyta did seem a little peeved at me earlier."

"What? Like it's YOUR fault her husband can't hold his liquor?" Sheppard grinned.

Logan shrugged. "I think she expects me to know better than to let them get toasted like that."

"And you were designated pilot?" he teased.

"What?" she asked.

"Designated pilot. That's what you called it last night."

Logan closed her eyes and shook her head slightly. "What else did I do?"

A wicked grin came over his face. "You mean before you started stripping off your clothes?"

Her face reddened. "Oh God," she muttered.

"We were alone, babe, no need to be embarrassed," he assured her.

"What else?" she groaned.

"Oh...something about wanting to play with my...joystick..." he taunted mercilessly.

That earned him a hard smack on the arm. "You're making that UP!" she yelped.

"Ow! Easy, Sparks, you were hard enough on me last night," he took a step back to avoid another smack.

"Keep it up, flyboy, and it'll be a while before I play with your joystick again!" she warned.

He tried to look suitably chastised, but failed miserably. "Yes, dear."


	94. Chapter 94

LATER THAT DAY

"So it's working?" Logan asked again.

McKay exhaled in exasperation. "It's working. I promise."

"Good. Thank you, Rodney. Good job," she patted him on the shoulder, turned and walked away.

McKay stared at her retreating back. The woman was exhausting. She'd been pestering him all afternoon to finish up, insisting that she couldn't bring her children home until Atlantis was secured. He understood where she was coming from, of course, but he loathed being the one in her line of fire.

Logan returned to the infirmary to find a chipper and smiling Caldwell 2.0 sitting up in bed. "Well, well, you look strong enough to wrestle a bear, Colonel," she beamed.

"Thanks to you, and what happened to calling me Steve?" he asked.

"Proper military form and all that," she replied with a wave of her hand.

"Technically, we're the same rank here," he reminded her.

"You're right, we ARE," she winked. "So, feel like getting out of here?"

He instantly perked up even more. "Seriously?"

"I talked to Carson, he said it would be alright, as long as you didn't overexert yourself."

"What about the tremors?" he asked.

"It's up to you, whether or not to risk one in public. I just wanted to give you the choice - whether to stay here, safe and sound, or take a REAL tour of Atlantis - as yourself."

He beamed brightly at her. "What do you think?" he asked.

She shrugged. "Lyta was kind enough to send a change of clothes for you. For some reason, I think they'll be a perfect fit."

He changed in record time and returned to her side. "Ready," he announced.

Logan smiled and led him out the door. Their first stop was the control room, where he chatted amiably with Weir for a few minutes, in between being shown the wonders of some of the Ancient technology they'd discovered over the years. Seeing it all, he felt the loss of the great city in his own reality even more.

The ZPM's and the two Ancient cities they'd found so far, thanks to these good people, had gone a long way toward convincing the powers that be on Earth that all was not lost in the Pegasus Galaxy. But neither of those cities compared to the splendor of Atlantis.

After the control room, Logan took him for a quick spin around the planet in one of the jumpers, so he could see, from the air at least, all the progress they'd made on the mainland. Where once there was a fledgling village on the mainland, a modern city had come to be. Gone were all the crude huts and tents that once housed the Athosians. Now there were solid, modern houses, farms and even a resort-type facility, mainly used for vacations and R & R, on one coast. Logan showed him her and Sheppard's favorite beach, still private, thanks to Caldwell and O'Neill.

She explained about the shield technology they had, and how they'd ensured the safety and security of everyone on the mainland by keeping them as shielded as Atlantis was. Any time a Wraith ship, hive or otherwise, was detected anywhere near their planet, the shields came up and everything was locked down until the potential threat passed. He was as amazed as they all were that they'd been able to remain completely undetected by the Wraith for so long. That, as much as their skill and cunning, contributed to the slow, steady decline of the Wraith dominance over the Pegasus galaxy in this reality.

When they returned to Atlantis, Logan invited him to join her family for dinner, explaining that they would be dining with Mitchell, and his family, and Daniel Jackson and his family, as well as McKay and Carter. He graciously accepted and followed Logan to the mess.

Upon arriving in the mess hall, Logan was practically bowled over by a gaggle of miniature Sheppards hurtling themselves at her.

"Mama!" they all cried in unison.

The two youngest weren't as fast on their feet, so it took them a while to make their way toward her. Logan made sure to kiss, hug and cuddle each one of them, assuring them that she'd missed them all terribly. Caldwell stood back and watched as Logan transformed from Colonel Devane to just plain Mom - not that there was anything plain about her, of course. He was instantly charmed by all the children, something very rare for him, and found himself enjoying his interaction with them.

"Where's Sam?" Nic asked him.

Logan intervened, explaining that _this_ Caldwell was not _their_ Caldwell, and that he was visiting, just like the other Sheppard had a few months before. Caldwell was surprised that they would come right out and tell the children, thinking it might confuse them, but they seemed to take it in stride, as though it were nothing out of the ordinary. Then again, they'd been raised in Atlantis, so they were very likely used to things being unusual here. for them, it was merely another day in the Pegasus Galaxy.

He also got along well with Colonel Simmons, Sheppard's brother, who decided to stay and share the meal with them after all. He learned that they had, in fact, served at several of the same duty stations back on Earth, though not at the same time, nor in the same branch. Simmons was a Marine, a breed he normally didn't care for. But, he found himself liking Simmons in spite of his military affiliation.

Logan and Sheppard had done a wonderful job with their children, Mitchell, too. He'd been watching them interact with the kids, totally incredulous that Sheppard and Mitchell were not only NOT at each others throats, but that they were the closest of friends, brothers, almost. In his reality, the two men were civil to one another, but they were most definitely not what one could call friends. Perhaps, given enough time, that could change.

It helped that Mitchell appeared to be completely besotted with his wife, Riateh, and that they now had children of their own. He admired the way the two men looked out for each others' children. It was obvious to anyone who saw them together that Mitchell adored all of Sheppard's children, and Sheppard adored his - both sets of twins.

What he really hadn't been prepared for, was Daniel Jackson. He'd known that he was coming, along with his family, but he wasn't prepared for how well all of them got along together. One big, happy family - the lot of them. The Daniel Jackson he knew had never married, and to this day, he still carried a torch for Logan, despite the fact that he'd been the first one to recognize that they would never have a future together. He'd been happy, sort of, for her when Logan married Mitchell, but there were a few people, himself included, who knew how much he still cared for her. This Daniel Jackson, on the other hand, was a completely different person than him. He was happy. Deep down happy. He wondered how much of that was the realization of his dream - of finding and living in Atlantis, and how much was due to the love of his family.

By the end of the evening, the children were worn out and each of them had either found a lap to curl up in, or were already asleep under the table. Cadence had found her way into Caldwell's lap and settled in. She chattered with him animatedly for a bit, then snuggled against him and promptly fell asleep. Logan offered to take her from him, but he declined, insisting that he was fine with her where she was. The young toddler was the very image of Logan, unlike her other children who so strongly resembled Sheppard, or in Scott's case, Mitchell, so it was easy for him to get attached to the girl.

The biggest surprise for him came in the form of Rodney McKay, who not only appeared to be romantically involved with Colonel Carter, but who was as comfortable and confident with the children as the other men. Sheppard had been right when he told them that HIS McKay was vastly different than theirs was. It was actually quite amusing to watch McKay interacting with the children, and hearing them call him Uncle Rodney. He was absolutely sure that his McKay would have broken out into hives at even the thought of being around children.

As the party broke up, he was almost reluctant to relinquish the sleeping child in his arms. He offered to carry her back to their quarters, which Logan graciously accepted, having her own hands full with Scott. Sheppard had Nic and Tommy each slung over a shoulder, dead-out, and Simmons carried Chelsea. He'd wondered, at first, how Logan and Sheppard managed to keep all of them corralled on a daily basis, but it had quickly become clear that it was definitely a group effort. Mitchell kissed the twins goodnight as they prepared to leave, juggling his other set in both arms, then followed his wife out the door ahead of them.

When Logan and Sheppard had all the kids put down for the night, she escorted him back to the infirmary. Ordinarily, they would have given him his own guest quarters, but with the constant threat of cascade tremors present, Beckett thought it best for him to bunk in the infirmary, so he wouldn't be alone. He hadn't suffered one all day, so far, but Logan agreed that it was better to be safe than sorry.

"I hope we didn't bore you too much," she smiled sheepishly at him.

"Not at all," he assured her. "It was quite...illuminating."

"Oh?"

"You're a wonderful mother, Logan. I knew you would be, but it was still nice to see."

"Thank you."

"And your kids are...amazing."

"We think so, but thank you, again," she beamed proudly.

"You have a great life here," he sighed.

"Yes, we do. And we try never to take it for granted."

"I just hope we can build something like this in my reality," he said wistfully.

"You can. All of you. Especially if you go out and explore those worlds we gave you the addresses for..." she trailed off meaningfully.

"That was subtle," he deadpanned.

"It's a gift," she quipped.

"Thanks for including me in your dinner party, Logan. I really enjoyed myself."

"I'm glad. And, you're welcome. I'm sorry you have to stay here instead of in a guest quarters, but I, for one, will sleep a lot better knowing that you're being looked after."

"I'll be fine, and thanks for caring."

She smiled warmly up at him. "Always, Steve... And I know my doppleganger feels the same way."

"Goodnight," he whispered.

She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him tenderly on the cheek. "Goodnight, Steve. I'll see you in the morning."

A few days and several cascade tremors later, Logan found herself in the infirmary again, healing the damage Caldwell had suffered from the cascade tremors, again. It was a little easier for her this time, as she wasn't as depleted, physically, as she'd been the first time she healed him. This time, she was passed out for no more than five minutes, though she was extremely tired for an hour or so afterwards. Caldwell had protested her putting herself at risk for him, but in the end, Sheppard and Beckett convinced him that there would be no arguing with her. If he didn't acquiesce, she would simply do it when he was asleep, or unconscious.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

It was Mitchell's birthday, and Riateh had planned a celebration for him, in honor of the occasion. She'd wanted to invite everyone in Atlantis, but she realized it would be better to keep it more modest. They had exclusive use of the gym, as they would need the room for dancing. The children were to be cared for by a team of six sitters, all of whom were above reproach and completely trustworthy, so the adults could let their hair down and have a good time without worrying about the children. That would be this evening, though. Right now, Mitchell was enjoying being spoiled by all the children.

They had helped to prepare a lunch feast for him, complete with many of his favorites. Riateh stared at him and shook her head as he looked ready to faint with happiness when he saw that they (along with Sheppard) had barbequed hamburgers and hot dogs on the balcony. Riateh was usually quite strict about his diet, insisting that he eat only healthy, strength-building foods. She thought this necessary because of the stresses and demands of his job. That, and she planned on keeping him around for many years to come. And, while she had to agree that things like pizza, beer and hot dogs were very tasty, they would do little in the way of proper nourishment and nutrition. Since it was his birthday, however, she decided to let him cut loose and eat whatever he wanted - TODAY.

Both Caldwell's made an appearance at lunch, and seemed to be enjoying the opportunity to get to know each other - or rather, themselves. They'd discussed their service records, the possibilities open to them in the Pegasus Galaxy - in both realities - and inevitably, the subject turned to Logan. Caldwell 2.0 informed him that Logan had shared with him the details about their friendship.

They were interrupted a moment later, by Logan, who came over and plopped a twin in each of their laps.

"Look kids, it's the Doublemint Twins," she quipped, smiling mischievously and pointing at the Caldwell's. "A little help, here, gentlemen?"

Caldwell 2.0 affectionately cuddled Cadence on his lap, while his counterpart engaged in an earnest "conversation" with Scott about military decorum. A moment later, Logan's earpiece crackled to life and she was summoned to the control room. Kissing Sheppard and making her apologies to everyone, she hurried out the door to attend to whatever it was Bates couldn't handle.

Upon reaching the control room, Bates motioned her aside and began leading her down the hall. "What's up?" she asked.

"See for yourself, ma'am," he smiled, pointing into the storage room where the Quantum Mirror was kept.

The doorway was brightly illuminated in blueish light, indicating that the shield/trap had been activated and someone was inside. She looked in and smiled broadly as she came eye to eye with Cameron Mitchell 2.0. Behind him, she could see McKay, Dr. Lam, Sheppard and her other self.

"About time," she snarked.

Mitchell smiled, genuinely amused to see two Logan's at the same time. "Gonna let us in?" he asked.

"Depends. Do you have a password for me?" she asked.

Oh yeah. They were in the right place. It was only between this reality and their own that they'd come up with the idea for a password. They'd mistakenly gone to two other realities, where there was no password in place, before they found the right one.

"Schizzelcritz," he muttered.

Logan signaled for Bates to turn off the shield and smiled warmly up at Mitchell. "Welcome to Atlantis," she greeted.

"Thank you. I suppose you know why we've come, but I'm sure, from what McKay tells us, that it's probably too late by now to save him," Mitchell said, a hint of pain in his eyes.

"Actually, if you're referring to your Colonel Caldwell, he's very much alive, mostly well, and currently scarfing down hot dogs with my children," she announced happily.

They stared at her, dumbfounded. "How can that be? He's been here too long!" Lam said.

"That, my good doctor, is a very long story, one which I'm sure he'll enjoy sharing with all of you. It's, uh...probably not a good idea for all of you to come marching through the city, but if one of you wants to come with me to retrieve him...?"

"Won't he need a wheelchair, or a gurney?" Lam asked.

"Oh no, he's perfectly capable of walking here on his own two feet..."

"I'll go," Mitchell cut her off.

"Good. Logan, John? Nice to see you again."

"Likewise," they replied in unison. Mitchell rolled his eyes, though he kept a genial smile on his face.

"Cam, if you'll follow me?"

"We'll, uh... see you on the other side, Mitchell," Sheppard 2.0 informed him, herding the others back through the mirror.

Mitchell nodded and turned back to face Logan. "After you, Colonel?"

Logan waved to the others, now standing on the other side of the mirror and led Mitchell down the hall.

"By the way, Happy Birthday," she smiled up at him.

"Thank you," he replied graciously, touched that she would mention it to him. "I'm, uh, sure you caught the look," he said sheepishly.

"I did."

"They do that all the time," he said, mildly annoyed.

"I know," she replied neutrally.

"You, too, huh?" he cringed.

"All the time. General O'Neill likes to pretend that it bugs him, but I know he finds it….. endearing."

"I'm sure," Mitchell rolled his eyes again.

Logan slowed her pace, wanting a few more moments alone with him. "I take it they're together?" she guessed.

"Yeah. She told me after she came back from visiting you here," he murmured, pain etched across his handsome features.

"And you're wondering if I'm to thank for that?" she asked.

"No!" he replied too quickly. "No. I knew it was over…."

"When they met up again?" she asked.

"Yeah. I could just….tell."

"She never wanted to hurt you, Cam, you know that, right?"

Mitchell nodded sadly, stopping to look out a nearby window. "I know. I also know she would have stayed in our marriage just to…." He shrugged, trailing off absently.

"I'm sorry," she said sincerely, knowing there was nothing else she could say to ease his pain.

"I WANT you…HER…. to be happy…..Even if it's not with me," he said unequivocally.

"She knows that, and she wants the same for you."

"I realize that. Look…I'm sorry I'm dumping all of this on you…." He said sheepishly.

"Don't be. I'm sorry you don't have the benefit of having known John for all these years, of having that foundation of friendship that your double has had here. I think it made a huge difference for all of us."

"How so?"

"Ooohh….How long have you got?" she laughed. "Let's just say they were able to see past their own issues and rebuild the friendship they'd always shared."

"In spite of the fact that they were both madly, passionately in love with you," he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Maybe _because_ of that," she countered. "Come on, Cam... I want to show you what we've all managed to build... _together_."

Logan went inside and checked to make sure that all the others were out on the balcony before she brought Mitchell 2.0 in. She hurriedly led him through the gym and opened the balcony door, but kept the drapes closed. She then went on to explain that he could see everything from here without being seen himself. He took a quick glance through the drapes before starting to ask her questions.

"Caldwell does look okay," he noted.

It hadn't been hard to figure out which Caldwell was which, since only one of them was in uniform and wearing a General's insignia.

"I'll let him explain that to you. Do you see... erm... yourself?"

He nodded. And that must be...Riateh?" he looked to her for confirmation.

"Logan told you."

"Yeah. Haven't met her yet. And those..." he drew in a quick breath as he saw his double, now sitting with Scott and Cadence in his lap.

"Those two are mine...His and mine... The smaller bundles over there (pointing) are Riateh's," she explained.

"Wow," he breathed, awe-stricken.

"Beautiful, aren't they?" she beamed with pride.

"They're... amazing. And she... she looks just like you."

Logan shrugged. "Well I had to have at least ONE who looked like me, Chelsea and the boys look so much like you or John..."

Mitchell's eyes went to the other children, easily picking out Sheppard's offspring. He had to admit, they were all beautiful children. He was intrigued when her oldest, (Chelsea, was her name?) came over to embrace his counterpart. The deep affection between them was obvious to anyone who looked at them. He could sense the bond, even from afar, and he looked at Logan curiously.

"Didn't she also tell you that you - that HE - was the one who delivered her?" she asked.

Mitchell shook his head. "How did that happen?" he asked.

She gave him the short version of the story, but it was enough to make him understand her Mitchell's attachment to Sheppard's eldest. He knew how he would feel had it been he in that situation. Then he turned his attention to the woman named, Riateh.

"She is quite the stunner," he said, studying her from afar.

"And more than that, Cam... Do you think I would trust my children to just anyone, much less some bimbo who attached herself to you?"

"No, I know you wouldn't," he admitted.

"She is one of the best and closest friends I've ever had. I trust her completely. You know that means a lot, coming from me."

He nodded. It was the same with his Logan. Trust didn't come easy for her. It would be less so once she had children. "I do."

"You can have this, too," she prodded.

"Not quite," he chuckled. "I will never be the father of her children."

Logan put a hand on his shoulder and pointed to Riateh. "No. But you can be to hers. It didn't take him long at all to recognize what a remarkable woman she is, Cam. I have a feeling you'll see the same thing when you meet her. In YOUR reality."

"Subtle, aren't you?"

"Subtlety doesn't work on SOME people," she teased.

He laughed as he looked into her eyes. It was eery, how like his own Logan she was. It was almost surreal talking to her. Knowing her, but not really knowing HER. He was about to ask why she was being so kind to him, why she cared whether he was happy or not but, he realized he already knew the answer. She was Logan.

"Thank you."

She looked up at him curiously. "For what?"

"For all of this. For telling me... everything."

"You say that as if this was hard for me - being nice to you - I mean, when it's the most natural thing in the world."

He was about to reply when a small body hurled into the room. "Mama! I peeped in potty when you were gone!" Scott announced.

He stopped and looked up in confusion at Mitchell. "Dadda..."

Mitchell froze, unsure what to do. Logan shook her head slightly and pursed her lips. "That's great, sweetie," turning to Mitchell. "Isn't it, Daddy?"

Mitchell nodded, plastering a smile on his handsome face. "Yeah, it sure is...You do all the Mitchell men proud...son." he stammered.

Scott raised his hands to Mitchell, wanting to be picked up. "Hug," he demanded.

Without any further thought, Mitchell scooped him into his arms and gave him a fierce hug. Logan could see how much it meant to him to have this moment with her son. A boy who was the very image of him. He closed his eyes and breathed in Scott's scent, forever engraving it in his memory. He and Logan had been toying with the idea of starting a family, prior to coming to Pegasus, but he'd never been so completely sure he was ready to have children until that very moment.

"Scotty, honey, why don't you run across the room and get Uncle John's guitar? Maybe he or Daddy will play some music for you." Logan suggested.

"Kay!" he said, wriggling out of Mitchell's arms.

"Take it out to the balcony, okay?" she called after him.

"Kay!" he repeated.

"Isn't that going to confuse him?" Mitchell asked.

"He's still very young. He'll just think you went back outside before he got there... Watch."

A moment later, Scott appeared on the balcony and walked over to Sheppard and Mitchell, who were standing apart from the others, talking. He was carrying a guitar that was slightly larger than he was.

"Whoa, space cowboy!" Mitchell exclaimed.

"Mama say play!" he held the guitar up by the neck for Mitchell.

"Mama?" Sheppard looked around. "Mama's back?"

"Inside," he pointed inside.

"Go ahead, Cam. I'll be right back," Sheppard clapped him on the back and headed inside to find Logan.


	95. Chapter 95

Mitchell began to strum on the guitar, getting a feel for the tuning, while Sheppard excused himself to go find Logan. He was stunned to see her standing by the balcony door with... Mitchell. He shook his head and flashed him one of his half-grins.

"I see we have another visitor," Sheppard acknowledged.

"They finally came for the Colonel," Logan confirmed.

"So... Just taking a peek at your other self?" he asked Mitchell.

"Something like that."

"And Scotty saw you," Sheppard deduced.

"My doing, John. I thought it might be nice for him to see...you know..." she trailed off.

"Great kid, isn't he?" Sheppard smiled openly.

"Yeah...They all are," Mitchell replied. "You're a very lucky man."

Sheppard nodded, pointing outside. "So is he? In case you couldn't tell."

"I can tell," Mitchell admitted grudgingly.

The strong, clear sound of singing came wafting through the open doorway. Chelsea. Mitchell had convinced her to sing along as he played the guitar. The three of them were as riveted to her as those outside. Sheppard had always said that she could sing like an angel, just like Logan, but it never ceased to amaze him every time he heard her sing. Mitchell 2.0 stared at her, open-mouthed, and again felt the strange pull he'd felt earlier upon seeing the beautiful little girl.

When Chelsea finished her song, applause filled the air. Sheppard wiped away the single tear that had rolled down his face as she sang. He was beaming with such pride, and the love he felt for her shone in his eyes. Someone fired up the boombox and soon enough, everyone was dancing and laughing and having a great time. Mitchell picked up Elexa and began dancing around the balcony, while Riateh held her twin. Mitchell 2.0 watched closely, the interaction between his other self and the woman he'd married. They did appear to be very much in love, and very happy.

"You can have it, too, Cam. All you have to do is reach out and grab it." Logan said.

He nodded, deep in thought.

"You're welcome to stay. Meet everyone," Sheppard offered.

"I..." he looked searchingly at Sheppard. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" he asked.

"Sure," Sheppard agreed.

"I'm just going to go check on the Colonel," Logan said, excusing herself.

They watched as she appeared on the balcony and made her way over to where both Caldwells were sitting. Lyta had come in, while she'd been with the other Mitchell, and she brought Sam and Riley with her. They'd been shocked, at first, to see the two men side-by-side, but like the Sheppard/Mitchell clan, they seemed to take it in stride. Sam greeted Logan with a hug and a kiss, then ran off to play with Chelsea. Riley had taken a seat in Caldwell 2.0's lap and was happily chatting with him about what his reality was like. She could see that Caldwell was completely smitten with her, and he kept looking over at Sam, with loving, incredulous eyes.

"Riley, honey, mind if I speak with the Colonel here for a few minutes?" Logan asked.

"No, ma'am." Riley chirped. She kissed Caldwell on the cheek and patted his face gently. "You're just like Daddy," she announced, before sliding off his lap, giving Logan a quick kiss and then skipping off to play with Sam and Chelsea.

Caldwell looked after her, completely thunderstruck.

"The love of a child..." Logan smiled knowingly. "It's a very powerful thing."

"Yes..." he trailed off, then forced himself to drag his eyes off the children. "You...uh, get your emergency handled?"

"I did."

"What was it?" General Caldwell asked.

"Actually, your people have finally come for you," Logan said gingerly.

Mitchell 2.0 and Sheppard still watched from the gym, as Logan spoke with the Caldwells.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Sheppard asked.

"Uh, you and me...er, HIM," he clarified, pointing at his counterpart.

"Okay," Sheppard shrugged. "You want to know how we got past our mutual love for the same woman." It was not a question, but a statement.

"Logan explained a lot to me, but..."

"You want to know more."

"I...guess what I want to know, mainly, is how you and he came to be such good friends."

"Well... Logan aside, we have a lot in common. Logan and I weren't even together when he came to Pegasus. Our friendship was formed because of those commonalities. It helped that we were both pilots, but we also have a lot of the same values and stuff."

"I see," Mitchell murmured.

"You know, the one you REALLY should be talking to is yourself...Er, Cameron. The OTHER Cameron."

"What about me?" the man in question stepped inside and joined them. Sheppard introduced them and then left to give them a few moments to talk.

"So, you were really able to let go - ALL the way - and never look back."

Mitchell stared at himself for a moment before replying. "I'm not saying it was easy, mind you, and I wouldn't exactly say I let go completely. We're still very much wrapped up in one anothers' lives."

"But, you're happy."

"Ridiculously happy," Mitchell confirmed.

"And you love this woman, Riateh."

"More than I ever thought possible."

Mitchell 2.0 turned and looked away, deep in thought.

"If you ever want to have even the hope at the same kind of happiness, you have to reach out and take it," Mitchell informed his double.

He smiled. "Logan said the same thing."

"Don't ya just HATE it when she's right?!" Mitchell quipped.

His double laughed in spite of himself. "More than I can say."

"Well, you two seem to be enjoying yourselves," they turned to find Logan entering the room again with a wide smile on her face, and Cadence in her arms.

Cadence looked at the two of them, confusion lighting her eyes. "Two Dadda?" she asked Logan.

"Just for a little bit, sweet-pea," Logan assured her then looked up at the Mitchells. "Thought you might like to meet Scott's twin."

He already couldn't take his eyes off her. She smiled sweetly up at both men. "Dadda?" she asked.

"Right here, Princess," Mitchell reached out and took her in his arms.

"She's even more beautiful up close," Mitchell 2.0 murmured in awe.

Mitchell looked down at Logan. "Just like her mother."

"Stop," Logan blushed.

Mitchell 2.0 came over to stand beside his double and held his hand out to the tiny girl. "Hello Cadence," he smiled.

"Dadda?" she looked from one to the other.

"Uncle Cam," Mitchell told her.

"Oh," she murmured, holding her arms out for 'Uncle Cam' to take her.

Mitchell thought his heart would melt right then and there as he took the beautiful child in his arms and cuddled her close.

"One or both of you had better put in an appearance out there," Logan said. "It IS your birthday, after all."

"Right," they said in unison.

"Come on," she shook her head and herded the two men out the door.

LATER

Later that evening, after the children had been given into the care of their sitters, the adults, Mitchell and Caldwell 2.0 included, proceeded to party long into the night with a select group of their closest friends.

Both 2.0 versions had to admit, by the end of the party, that they were more than a little intrigued by the women their counterparts had married. The glimpse into their possible futures Logan had given them had done precisely what she'd hoped it would: Open their eyes to what they could have.

The thought of a family, such as their counterparts had here, was an enticing one for both men. A possibility that, up until coming here, neither one of them thought was open to them anymore. They wanted this. More than they wanted to admit. Mitchell now understood why his Logan had suddenly been so resolved to forge a life with Sheppard when she returned from her brief visit here. She'd seen what he had.

While they watched the others, dancing and having fun, Caldwell explained to him everything that had happened, and how he'd come to be here in the first place. Mitchell had been suitably horrified by his experience with Apophis and then amazed to discover that Logan and Sheppard, as well as their children, were actually discovered to not only have the Ancient gene, but to BE Ancients themselves. It changed everything they believed they'd understood about the Ancients up to know. And the fact that Logan had, not once but twice, healed Caldwell of the damage he suffered as a result of the cascade tremors, was nothing short of miraculous, to him.

He asked Logan about it and he called Riateh over to explain to him what it meant, or rather how it was, that she and Sheppard had descended through a direct line from the Ancients. By the time they were ready to leave, they had a wealth of information to share with the others back in their own reality. Mitchell hugged and kissed her goodbye, after having one last, quick peek at the sleeping children. He thanked her for showing him what she had, and for helping him to understand his Logan better, who Sheppard was, and giving him the kick in the pants he needed.

Caldwell had a more difficult time saying goodbye. He'd been there longer; had formed attachments that were difficult to let go of. He was somewhat eager, now, to seek out the Athosian homeworld and meet the Lyta there, but he was deeply saddened to have to let go of Logan. They'd grown very close and, though he had his own Logan, he would miss this one terribly.

"You know this isn't goodbye forever, Steve," she murmured as he held her. "I fully expect you to keep me apprised of how you're all doing."

"Good to know."

"Take care of yourself, Steve. Take care of all of them."

"I will," he promised.

"Check in soon?" she asked.

"Soon," he agreed.

THREE MONTHS LATER

"Well why can't your father or I take you?" Logan asked.

Chelsea was definitely behaving squirrely.

"Because, I need Uncle Cam to take me."

"Why?" Logan tried to pin her down again.

"Because it's a surprise, and you trust me implicitly with your daughter," Mitchell said, walking up behind Logan.

"Oh. Well why didn't you say so?" Logan chirped.

Chelsea rolled her eyes. "I did, Mommy!"

"So you did," she patted her on the head. "Okay, sweetie. You know the rules. You obey Uncle Cam just like you do Mommy and Daddy..." she paused, looking from Chelsea to Mitchell and back. "Check that, obey him BETTER than you do Mommy and Daddy."

Chelsea smiled. "Yes, ma'am."

"And you!" she poked Mitchell in the chest. "Don't let her fly that jumper all over the galaxy!"

"Me?" he feigned innocence.

"YOU let me fly, so does Daddy," Chelsea whined.

"Yes. SHORT hops, sweetpea. That's it. Clear?" Logan said firmly.

"Yes ma'am," Chelsea replied.

"Yes ma'am," Mitchell echoed.

"Good. When can we expect you home?" she asked.

"By dinner time, I promised Riateh," Mitchell replied.

"Have fun, you two. Can't wait to see what this surprise of yours is," Logan grinned.

"You have to wait!" Chelsea smiled mischievously.

"Yeah, you'll have to wait!" Mitchell made a face at her.

"Uh-huh...Take off you two, I have work to do!"

They kissed her goodbye and Mitchell took Chelsea's hand in his to lead her to the jumper bay. Logan watched them go, happily chattering as they walked away. It had been two months since Teller was taken into custody and there had been no further threats, from him or anyone else in the NID. Cowell had stayed true to his word, so far. Logan and Sheppard gradually began to relax a little and breathe a little more easily while the kids were out of their sight for a little while.

"So how did you find out about this place?" Mitchell asked as they walked along the path on R58-992.

"Teyla told me about it," she replied, stopping to pick a handful of flowers along the way. "Mommy will like these," she noted.

"They're very pretty," he smiled down at her.

"You should take some to Aunt Riateh, too," she suggested.

"Good idea," he agreed.

"I'm full of good ideas," she informed him.

"Yes you are. You have always been a very bright girl," he hugged her closely to him.

"Uncle Rodney says that's HIS influence," she said, stifling a grin.

"Is that right?" he winked at her.

"Uncle Rodney doesn't know how smart Mommy and Daddy really are."

"I think a lot of people don't know that, until it's too late," he grinned.

"Part of their strategy?" she asked.

"What do you know about strategy, young lady?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Uncle Rodney's teaching me to play chess, you know. He says strategy is very important in chess... and other things."

"He's right. It's very important in battle, too."

"So Mommy and Daddy play dumb to fool their enemies?"

He laughed. "Well, I wouldn't go right to 'dumb' sweetpea, but they sure don't let on to people about how smart they really are. And yes, that's strategy."

"I thought so."

As they emerged from the trees and into a clearing, a sudden burst of blue light illuminated the surrounding area. Both Mitchell and Chelsea were hit and collapsed to the ground. A moment later, their still forms were surrounded by six people, who checked them for weapons and then quickly bound their hands and feet.

"Get them back to the jumper," the leader ordered.

"Right away," a second man replied.

Two men picked up Mitchell, while another slung Chelsea over his shoulder and headed back in the direction they had come from.

"How are we to fly it?" the third asked.

"We will use his hands to activate the controls. It should be easy to pilot once it is turned on," the leader informed him.

ATLANTIS

Nic was sitting at his little desk, ostensibly doing his homework for the day, but he kept staring off out the window, his little brow furrowed, lost in thought. Logan watched him for a few moments, then tiptoed off to get Sheppard. She brought him back and pointed out what Nic was doing, a questioning look on her face. He pulled her aside and, with a sheepish grin, he shrugged.

"I used to do the same thing when I was supposed to be doing my homework. So did you, as I recall," he reminded her.

She nodded slowly. "Yeah, I just...I dunno, John, I'm kind of getting this weird..."

"MOM, DAD!" Nic suddenly called out, startling them both.

"Chels!" Logan gasped, turning white as a sheet.

Nic ran out into the hall, a look of panic on his face.

"What's wrong, son?" Sheppard asked, getting down on one knee to face him.

"I don't know..." he fretted. "Where's Chels? Shouldn't she be home by now?"

Sheppard looked at his watch. "No, son, not for a couple of hours," glancing up at Logan's (still) pale face.

"Can we call Uncle Cam?" he asked.

"Sure...sure son, no problem. I'll head up to the control room right now and give him a call, okay? No need to worry. Now," he patted him on the butt. "Head back in and get that homework done, alright?" he said nonchalantly.

Nic hesitated a moment, looking from Sheppard to Logan, who'd managed to paste a reassuring smile on her face for his benefit. "Yes sir."

After he'd gone, Sheppard took Logan by the hand and pulled her into the living room. "You think something's wrong?"

She nodded. "Can't you feel it?" she searched his eyes.

He took a deep breath and tried concentrating on his eldest daughter. He could picture Nic, in his room, seated at his desk, Tommy he could *see* playing with his toys. The twins were...sleeping. He couldn't *find* Chelsea though. He couldn't *feel* her.

"Oh God," he croaked.

"John..." she bit her lip.

"On my way," he kissed her quickly and sped out the door. She was surprised to see Lyta out in the hall as Sheppard left.

"Logan? What's wrong?" she asked, deeply concerned by the look on her face.

"I...We're not sure...We just got a really bad feeling...about Cameron and Chelsea."

"Go," she took Logan's hands in hers and gave them a squeeze.

Logan looked at her and then back at the hallway. "I..."

"Go, Logan. I will watch the children for you," she insisted.

"I..Nic already suspects... I think he feels what we felt."

Lyta smiled reassuringly. "I will have Torus come down. He will distract Nic and Tommy both. We will be fine, now go."

Logan hugged her and sped out the door after Sheppard. When she reached the control room and saw Sheppard's face, she knew they were right. Something was terribly wrong. Caldwell was pacing back and forth, as was Weir, both also wore a worried expression.

"John?" she asked.

"They're not responding," he told her grimly.

"Oh my God," she gasped.

Within moments they had a team put together comprised of Sheppard, Logan, Teyla, Teal'c, Carter, Daniel, Ronan, Lorne, Bates, and about ten others. Sheppard and Logan were assured that their other children would be watched over and guarded in their absence, as well as Mitchell's twin girls. Riateh would be free to remain with them, if she chose, or she could come and wait with them in the control room. Caldwell and Weir watched as one by one, three jumpers were lowered through the hatch into the gateroom and sped through the Stargate to search for Mitchell and Chelsea.

"I had a feeling something was wrong," Riateh said, after Caldwell informed her what was going on. She'd left the girls in the capable hands of Lyta and Kitah, who along with two other Athosian women, were watching the Sheppard children as well as their own.

They'd all been taken to the *theater* that had been built so that Atlantis families could enjoy movies together, Earth-style. Nic knew something was off, but David, Torus and Sam were keeping him occupied. The other children seemed oblivious and happy to have been given this special treat.

"We're going to find them," Caldwell promised her.

"Of course we will," Riateh smiled up at him. "John and Logan alone are tenacious enough, but with so many out searching...I have no doubt they will be found."

Riateh's mind went exactly to the same place Caldwell and Weir's minds had gone.

"You do not think it was this...Trust... you have spoken of, do you?" she asked. "Those you were so concerned about a few months ago?"

"That thought did cross my mind," he admitted truthfully.

She appreciated his honesty.

"Look, this is still the only gate capable of travel back to Earth. If it is the Trust, there's no way they can get past us here."

"And if it IS the Trust, and they have another way of getting back to Earth?" she asked.

He stared at her for a moment, uncomprehending at first.

"They have been known to be in possession of the Goa'uld motherships before, have they not?"

Caldwell nodded. "Yes, but our long range sensors haven't picked up any ships..."

"Mightn't they be cloaked vessels?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yes, they very well could be," he admitted. "But they would have to de-cloak before jumping into hyperspace, and we'll be watching for that. "I've also alerted the SGC and General O'Neill to be on their toes, too."

"Thank you, General Caldwell. I appreciate everything you are doing to find them."

UNKNOWN PLANET

On a faraway planet, the leader of the strike force that had captured Mitchell and Chelsea was explaining the situation to _his_ leader.

"What were they doing there?" she asked.

He shrugged. "Looks like it was a random trip. The child looked to be gathering flowers, for some reason. The man is not dressed in a uniform at all, but he was carrying weapons, and a communication device."

"Where are the weapons and the device?" she asked.

"Inside, ma'am."

"And the two you captured?"

"Also inside. We have not separated them, yet. They are both still unconscious. I thought it best to leave it up to you whether or not to separate them from one another. There is one other thing you should know, ma'am."

"What is it?"

"They are..."

"They are...what?" she asked impatiently.

"They are Lantean. Their ship is one of the jumpers we have seen before."

She gasped. "Lantean? This is bad, Denil. They were not to know of our plans!"

"They stumbled upon our camp, ma'am. There was nothing else we could do."

She ran ahead of him and burst through the door of the prison facility. Her worst fears were realized as she saw Mitchell lying on the floor, unconscious. Of course she recognized him. And the child? She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. There was no doubt about WHO the child belonged to. It wasn't this man, she cringed. The child was a Sheppard, through and through. A perfect female version of the one and only Colonel John Sheppard. Were they at war with the Lanteans, the child might prove a valuable bargaining chip, but now? This was NOT what they wanted or needed right now. All of their plans hinged on absolute secrecy. If the Lanteans knew what they were trying to do, she knew they would put a stop to it. She had no desire to go up against them. At least not now, and not unless it was absolutely necessary to ensure the success of their goals.

"We have an even bigger problem than you think, Denil."


	96. Chapter 96

She spoke urgently with Denil about ways to minimize the risk to their operation. They were agreed that the best course of action now would be to place the two unconscious Lanteans on some neutral planet and allow them to find their way home once they awakened. That way, they could not be implicated in their abduction, or the theft of one of the Lantean jumpers, which she fully intended to keep. It was far too valuable an asset for her to let go of, now that she had one in her possession. Surely some of her people would possess that gene needed to activate the thing, and they could learn to operate it. Either way, there was bound to be valuable information stored in the ships' computer system.

Unbeknownst to them, however, Chelsea began to awaken while they spoke. She also, unfortunately, opened her eyes and lifted her head to get a look around at her surroundings. She was somewhat groggy, but it seemed to her that there was something familiar about the woman who was issuing orders to the man outside the cell she was placed in. She glanced over and saw Mitchell lying unconscious on the floor next to her. She gasped and reached out to grab his hand. That caught their attention.

Chelsea's eyes met those of her female captor's and she knew that her initial thought had been right. She DID recognize the woman. What was worse, the woman recognized her, too. Not because they had ever met, but because of who she resembled so strongly.

"Well, my dear," the woman sighed. "It looks like your waking up so soon has spoiled our plans for your release. That is unfortunate. For you."

Chelsea gulped once, her mind working overtime. What would her parents do? "I could just...go back to sleep, if that'd help..." she suggested.

The woman smiled in spite of the gravity of the situation. She was indeed her fathers' daughter. "I am afraid not, little one, and for that I am truly sorry. I really had planned to let the both of you go, before you woke up. Care to tell me your name?"

"Wilma Flintstone," Chelsea said with a smile.

The woman smiled in return. "Or Wilma SHEPPARD?"

Chelsea gulped again. Yep. No question. The woman knew exactly who she was. She said nothing but shrugged in response.

"You're not going to try to deny it?" the woman asked.

"I look too much like my father to try and do that, ma'am," Chelsea admitted truthfully.

She nodded, very impressed with the child's composure. Most children would be curled up, crying in the corner, had they woken locked in a cell, in a strange place. But not THIS child. No. She was a Sheppard. A young one, to be sure, but she was a testament to her parents efforts to raise strong, capable children.

"So, Wilma..." she paused, looking closely at the child. Or is it..." she struggled to recall. "Chelsea?"

Chelsea flinched, but it was barely detectable.

"Yes, that's right. Chelsea Sheppard. Your parents are quite proud of you, aren't they?"

She nodded, defiance in her eyes. "Yes ma'am. They're proud of all their children."

The woman chuckled. "Of that I am sure. Tell me, young miss, what were you and Colonel Mitchell doing on that planet earlier?"

Chelsea clammed up completely. What they were doing wasn't exactly a top secret military mission, but she still knew better than to say anything to an enemy combatant, as her parents had taught her.

"Surely your folks would not send one so young out to SPY for them, would they?" the woman teased.

Mitchell suddenly bolted upright and grabbed onto Chelsea, pulling her close against his side. His head was pounding and he couldn't really make out anything clearly yet, but he knew that wherever they were, they hadn't gotten there by choice.

"Uncle Cam?" Chelsea whispered in his ear as she clung to his neck. "We have a problem."

The woman smiled again, waiting for Mitchell to get his bearings. She found the child utterly charming. It was a shame they had come to meet under these circumstances. She was sure that the two of them could have become great friends, if the child hadn't inadvertantly stumbled upon their secret camp the way she had, and if they'd been allowed to meet under friendlier terms.

Mitchell rubbed his eyes with one hand, while he held onto Chelsea with the other. His eyesight began to clear and he looked up at the faces of their captors. "Crap," he muttered.

"That's what *I* thought," Chelsea whispered.

"I wish I could say it was good to see you again, Colonel Mitchell. I really do," the woman said.

Chelsea looked up at Mitchell and smiled wryly. "She wants us to believe that she's sorry they caught us," Chelsea informed him.

"I'll bet," he muttered back.

"I am. You are the last people I wanted to have stumble upon our plans," she said.

"I'll bet," he repeated.

"I have no wish to antagonize your people, Colonel Mitchell."

"I should hope not, especially since we're the ones who put you in power to begin with. And since we're the ones who are going to kick your...(looking down at Chelsea) TAILS... from one end of the galaxy to the other for doing this."

"That may not be as easy for you as it once would have been, Colonel Mitchell, but still, I have no wish to stir up old...arguments."

"Then why take us?" he asked.

"You stumbled across one of our training camps, Colonel, or you were about to. We could not afford to let you see what we were doing."

He nodded. "I see."

"She said she was going to let us go, but then I woke up," Chelsea looked up at him apologetically.

"Not your fault, sweetpea, don't worry about it," he hugged her close.

"What the child says is true, Colonel. I was going to have you placed on some other planet and allow you to find your own way home again."

"You can still do that, you know. We'll give you a head-start so you can try and run," he grinned.

"Nice try," she grinned back.

"It was worth a shot," Chelsea agreed.

"She is very much like her father, isn't she?" Sora asked.

"You have noooo idea," Mitchell informed her.

"We'll take the necessary precautions then," she chuckled softly.

"You realize they will tear this galaxy apart to retrieve her, don't you? You'd be better off if you took us up on that offer for a head-start."

"They have no reason to suspect they we were involved in your disappearance. And they will find no evidence to suggest it on the planet you were taken from," she shook her head.

"Trust me, Sora, you're making a HUUUGE mistake. They don't have to know it was you... they will search and search until they find her. You know what happened last time one of the Genii took her."

Chelsea gave an involuntary shudder. She didn't remember much about the time one of the Kolya's had stolen, not just her, but several Lantean children. She remembered the fear and the uncertainty, but not any details. She also remembered when her parents had come to rescue them. That image - the faces of her parents, and Uncle Cameron - when they had confronted the kidnappers.

PLANET

Logan stood on a rise overlooking the Stargate, squeezing her hands into fists and releasing them, again and again and again. They hadn't found a single sign of Mitchell and Chelsea on the planet. Both had locater chips implanted in the back of their necks, but they had picked up no beacons when they arrived. The jumpers had criss-crossed the planet, while Rodney set about working on the DHD to try and trace the last address dialed.

Both Logan and Sheppard were wound tight; too tight. Everyone understood where they were coming from, however. This wasn't the first time one of their children had been stolen. Though there hadn't been any sign of hyperspace travel, they still believed it was possible that members of the NID were laying low, just waiting for their chance to escape from the Pegasus galaxy with their precious, stolen cargo in tow.

"Cam will protect her, Sparks, you know he will," Sheppard came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I know, John. He'll guard her with his life, but..." she bit her lip to keep from finishing that thought.

"Once he's done that, she won't have any protection?" he asked, already knowing the answer. He'd been thinking the same thing.

She nodded. "He'll only do that as a last resort, but... John, if its the NID that has them, they may not even waste their time with Cam, and that would leave Chels..." she bit back a sob.

"No, no, no... You know Cam... He'll find a way to stay with her, no matter what. He'll do whatever it takes to keep her safe until we can find them."

She nodded. "Riateh must be frantic," she sniffed.

"She's a strong woman."

"Yes, she is. But she also knows the bond that he and Chels share. She knows what he will sacrifice to keep her safe. He's the father of her children, John. That has to be tearing her up inside."

"He's father of two of our children, too, Sparks, and our best friend. I don't want to lose him either."

She looked up at him, reaching out to cup his face in her hands. "We WILL find them. And God HELP the ones who've taken them!" she said coldly.

"I'm with you, babe."

Lorne appeared behind them and they turned to face him. The grim look on his face confirmed what they already knew. "There's no sign, ma'am, sir. Nothing," he informed them.

"Okay then," he looked down at the Stargate again. "We wait for McKay to find the last address dialed and we follow."

"What if they just used that gate to hopscotch to another planet?" Lorne asked.

"Then we do what we've done before, Major. We hunt them down like rabid dogs until we find them and then we..." he trailed off meaningfully.

They'd done it before. He remembered the last time someone had taken their children. And the time before that. In either case, it hadn't ended well for the kidnappers. Not well at all.

"Colonel Sheppard, Colonel Devane, this is Ferguson on board the Daedalus," a voice went off in their headsets.

"Sheppard," he replied.

"Devane," she followed suit. "Do you have something for us?" she asked hopefully.

"I'm afraid not ma'am."

Sheppard cursed to himself. "What are you doing here?"

"General Caldwell sent me to extract one or both of you back to Atlantis, sir."

They exchanged a horrified look. "Why?" they asked in unison.

"I regret to inform you that one of your sons has taken ill."

They both gasped and instinctively clung to one another. "One... which one?" Not that it mattered.

"Uh... That would be young Nicolas, sir, ma'am. Shall I beam you aboard?"

Neither of them wanted to leave the search, but they also wanted to go back and check on what was wrong with Nic. It had to be serious for them to send the Daedalus after them. The others heard the conversation and Daniel sped over to where they stood, followed closely by Teal'c, then Teyla.

"Go," Daniel said. "I promise we won't let up on the search."

"You have my word, as well," Teal'c assured them.

"We will keep you informed every step of the way," Teyla added.

They knew they would all search well past the time when others might give up. And Logan could always go back to Atlantis, heal Nic and then rejoin the search.

"Thank you," they said in unison.

"Ferguson, two to beam up," Sheppard informed him.

An instant later, they disappeared in a flash of bright light. Logan got on the radio as soon as they appeared on the bridge and made contact with Atlantis. Ferguson took the Daedalus into hyperspace, intent on getting them back to Atlantis as soon as possible.

ATLANTIS

"Bottom line it for me, Doc?" Sheppard said, his brow furrowed with concern.

"I'm sorry, John. But the bottom line is that there's not a whole lot she can do for him, as far as healing him," Beckett said grimly.

"What are you saying?!" Sheppard gasped. "He's not..."

Beckett held up a hand. "No, he's not...not yet. I'm afraid though, that the only thing that will cure him - completely - is a bone marrow transplant."

"Take mine," Sheppard said without blinking.

"We'll test both you and Logan. We'll then test his siblings, with your permission, of course."

He looked across the infirmary, where Logan was sitting next to Nic, stroking his unruly hair and speaking to him in soft, soothing tones.

"Whatever it takes, Doc. I know I speak for Logan, too."

Beckett nodded. "Sit down, lad. We'll start with a blood sample from you..."

Logan looked over Nic to where Beckett was drawing blood from Sheppard. Even without asking, she knew that she wouldn't be able to heal her son completely. She would be able to slow the progression of the disease, but she could not replace the marrow he desperately needed. How had he gotten so sick, so quickly? She wondered for the hundredth time. He had been fighting off colds and such for several weeks now, but other than that, there had been no sign of such a serious illness.

When Beckett finished with Sheppard, he came over and changed places with Logan, so she could give a blood sample. Neither of them was as likely to be as perfect a match as Nic needed for the transplant, but they had to try. Janet had already gone to take blood samples from Tommy, Cadence and Scott, who, unfortunately, were as less likely as their parents to be a good enough match. What no one wanted to put into words, however, was that out of all of them, Chelsea, his FULL-sister, was the one most likely to be the perfect match he needed, given that she, too, had equal parts of both Sheppards and Logans DNA as Nic did. She was the only one who had that in common with him. The other children had only Logan or Sheppards DNA to offer.

GENII REBEL PLANET

Mitchell noticed that Chelsea seemed to be behaving increasingly distracted and upset. She wasn't scared, at least not yet, but it was as though she had other things on her mind besides their current situation. He waited for her to say something, but when it looked like she wouldn't, he called her on it.

"Okay, Cadet, out with it," he ordered gently.

She startled and looked up at him sheepishly. "Sir?"

"I want you to tell me what's bothering you," he said.

"Well..." she stalled. "For one thing, Uncle Cam, we're being held prisoner by the Genii..."

"Don't even try it, Cadet. I KNOW that's not what's bothering you. You haven't shown the slightest hint of fear since we woke up. Now, spill it."

She paused, trying to think of some way to get out of this, but he knew her far too well. And she'd never been able to lie to him any better than she could her parents.

"Chels?" he prodded.

"I've... been doing... something you guys wouldn't like..." she stammered nervously.

"And that is...?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Nic... he hasn't been feeling too good lately..." she murmured.

"Okay. I know he's been having a hard time fighting off a bug or something, so what does that have to do with..." he trailed off, his eyes widening in horror. "Chels, sweetpea, you haven't been..."

"Healing him? Yes, sir..." she admitted, her eyes downcast.

"Honey...Why? You know you're not supposed to... How dangerous that can be for you. Why didn't you tell your parents? Or ME?" he asked.

"We didn't want to worry you guys. You've been so busy and so worried about that guy..." she shrugged.

"The NID guy?" he asked.

She nodded. "Yeah, him."

"Sweetpea, that's OUR job. I thought we went over this with you. WE take care of YOU kids. Your job is just to be a kid, have fun, go to school... How long have you been secretly healing your brother?"

"A couple of months... When we were staying with Uncle Mike and Aunt Janet," she replied.

"Uh-huh... And you didn't think to tell Aunt Janet... _why_?" he demanded.

"She would have told you and Mommy and Daddy," she shrugged.

"Right... So honey, when the first healing didn't...take...Why didn't you say anything then?" he asked.

"He always felt better after I healed him," she shrugged.

"But he kept getting sick," he pointed out.

"Right."

"And now you're worried that he's getting sick again?" he prodded.

She nodded miserably. "I know he is...I can...tell..."

"How?" he asked.

"The same way Mommy can tell when one of us needs her," she replied.

"Well, sweetpea, they're WITH him, so you don't need to worry, okay?" he assured her.

"Uncle Cam..." she shook her head at his attempt to placate her.

"Hmmm?"

"You know they're out looking for US," she scolded him.

"Sure, yeah...right...But if he gets sick, you know they're going to go back to Atlantis to help him," he clarified.

She nodded, still somewhat unsure. "Okay."

ATLANTIS

"I'm sorry, John," Beckett said sadly.

"It's Chelsea, isn't it? She's his best chance for a good enough match," Sheppard asked.

Beckett nodded. "Aye lad, she is. We haven't given up though. Occasionally we do get lucky. General O'Neill has been conducting voluntary drives back on Earth to search for a match. We're leaving no stone unturned. And of course, young Chelsea may be found any moment now."

Sheppard tried to smile. He wasn't holding his breath. Whoever took her and Mitchell had certainly covered their tracks well. He looked over at his wife and son, cuddled up together and sleeping off the effects of her latest attempt to heal him as thoroughly as possible. The problem with those healing powers, or rather the limitations, he corrected himself, was that healing was accomplished by use of the bodies existing tissue and fluids. If that tissue, or blood were tainted, there was little that could be done.

From what she had been able to learn from Nic, during his more lucid periods, Chelsea had been trying her own hand at healing him, in secret, for months. That was why neither of them had noticed that Nic was so ill. He knew _why_ they did it, and in a certain way, he admired their spunk and ingenuity. But, like Logan, he was increasingly worried at their insistence to take on more and more adult problems at their tender, young ages. They wanted their children to be... well... _children_!

Feeling utterly helpless around, he felt like he needed to get back out there and search for his daughter and best friend. But he was loathe to leave Logan here to face this struggle alone. Yes, he knew she wasn't completely alone, but much of her support system was out looking for their eldest child, as she wanted them to be, of course. Riateh was here, but he wasn't sure how much comfort she would be, since she was worried about her missing husband. Caldwell was here, as well, but he was coordinating the search from the control room, and communicating with Earth on any leads or progress they might be making toward finding out if the NID did have Chelsea and Mitchell.

"John?" he heard the soft call from across the room.

He went to her side, taking her in his arms, careful not to awaken Nic.

"Any news?" she asked.

"No, Sparks..." he said, hanging his head.

"You have to go back out there," she informed him.

"I...know. But, I don't want to leave you..."

She smiled weakly. "I'd be out there right now, if I could...I hate having to choose between my children..."

"You're NOT," he assured her.

"It feels like I am. I stay here, I feel like I'm putting Nic first, if I go, I'd feel like I'm abandoning him..."

"And if we split up, they each have one parent watching out for them," he guessed.

She nodded. "You have to find them, John."

"I will, Sparks, I promise," he swore.

"We'll be waiting here for you all to get back. I'll keep our son safe, and alive..."

GENII REBEL PLANET

"You seem to have a lot of respect for my parents," Chelsea observed.

"I do, little one. If it weren't for them, we never would have been able to seize power from the corrupt men who governed my people before. Do you know what that means? Corrupt?"

"It means they were bad guys," Chelsea replied.

"Correct."

"So...what does that make _you_?" Chelsea asked.

Sora looked at her. "What do you mean?"

"How is what you're doing right now, any different from what THEY did?" she asked boldly.

Mitchell smiled. He was laying on a cot, with his back turned to the bars, pretending to be asleep. Sora hadn't counted on a mere child being so smart.

"What I do, what WE do, is all for my people, to make them strong again," Sora said.

Chelsea thought about that for a moment and then shook her head negatively. "That doesn't make any sense. My people, my PARENTS, gave you back...what is that called...? Self-determination?"

Mitchell smiled again. He wondered who had been tutoring her in such matters. Daniel, probably.

"What does a seven year old know of self-determination?" Sora stared at her dumbfounded.

"Simple. It means that choice belongs to the people. All the people of your world, not just a few of you. That's why leaders should be voted on by everyone. You want to have power over all of Pegasus, but what about those other people? What if they don't want you to have that power? What if they want to have their own rules and their own leaders? If you take over their worlds, and make them follow your rules, you take self-determination away from them - and that's not fair."

Sora stared at her, unblinking for a few moments. "I wonder at your teachers, little one. The things they teach you at such a young age."

Mitchell had to agree. She sounded far too wise for her age.

"I learn from my teachers, but I also learn from my parents, and Uncle Cameron, Uncle Daniel, Uncle Rodney and General Caldwell...They all set good examples for us kids," she informed her proudly.

"I see," Sora nodded slowly. "But you have not lived in the shadow of the Wraith for countless centuries. You were not around when the Genii WERE the largest power base in this galaxy. The Genii coalition..."

"Is dead," Chelsea finished for her. "Probably with good reason."

"How would you like to go for a walk, little one?" Sora asked with a smile.

The child had been cooped up in that cell for three days with Mitchell, and Sora thought she might appreciate some fresh air for a change.

"No way!" Mitchell barked, launching himself off the cot and placing himself between Chelsea and the cell door.

"The child needs exercise and fresh air, Colonel. Even her parents wouldn't argue against that," Sora reminded him.

"I wouldn't either, as long as I go with her," he said firmly.

"I'm afraid I couldn't trust you to behave, Colonel. A warrior of your skill and cunning...No, I think not."

Mitchell smiled humorlessly. "Then she's not going anywhere."

"Why punish her?" Sora asked.

"I'm not punishing her, I'm protecting her," he corrected her.

"I have no intention of harming her, Mitchell. I'm actually growing quite fond of her."

"Be that as it may, I am not letting her out of my sight," he told her.

"What do you have to say about the matter, little one?" Sora asked her directly.

Mitchell arched an eyebrow at her.

Chelsea took Mitchell's hand and jutted her chin out stubbornly. "If Uncle Cameron can't go, then I won't go."

"You do understand why I cannot let him walk around outside?" Sora asked.

"You're afraid we'll escape," Chelsea replied.

"I think you and I both know that he'll TRY," she smiled.

"Be that as it may," she began in a perfect imitation of Mitchell's tone. "I'm not going anywhere without Uncle Cameron."

Sora did her best to conceal her amusement. "Very well, have it your way." She then looked directly at Mitchell. "You behave in a very fatherly manner towards her, Mitchell. Tell me, is it because you love her that much, or is it that you fear Sheppard that much?"

"Both, actually. But the fear part...? That is something YOU should be thinking about, Sora. The last time someone took a member of his family, it didn't end well for them, as you well know."

"Indeed," she agreed. "And what of the child's mother? I never knew her well, but I have heard of her reputation. Do you fear her as much as you do Sheppard?"

"More. As should you," Mitchell replied gravely.

ATLANTIS

"Are you absolutely sure?" Logan asked O'Neill.

"Beyond a shadow of a doubt," he assured her. "The net around Atlantis, the SGC, the Pegasus galaxy...it's tight. No one has gotten in or out of there at all. The NID don't have her."

Logan nodded. She wasn't sure whether or not to be relieved. At least they knew who DIDN'T have her. But who DID?

"How's Nic?" he asked.

"He's holding on, sir. It helps to have me near by to counteract...you know..."

He nodded. "Mind if I see him, just for a bit? I brought him a little something."

She grinned thankfully up at him. "I think he'd love it, sir."


	97. Chapter 97

ATLANTIS

"Logan?" Riateh came up behind her as she stared out the window.

"Ri!" she threw her arms around her friend and hugged her tightly. "How are you holding up?"

Riateh shrugged and offered her a weak smile. "I am fine. And you?"

"Don't worry about me," she tried to brush off her concern. She had no intention of accepting comfort from a woman who was as scared witless about her missing husband as she was her missing child and friend.

"But I do, Logan. We are friends, are we not?"

"Of course..I just...You have enough on your mind right now without adding me to the list."

"And that prevents you from worrying about me? Your eldest child and one of your dearest friends - the father of your twins - are missing. Your son is ill. Yet you still have time to worry about me and my feelings."

Logan shrugged. "I love you, Ri... I know how difficult it must be for you, not knowing where they are..."

"Yes, it is. It would be moreso were I not surrounded by people who love and care for us."

Logan smiled. "Yes, it would."

"You know he would trade his life for hers, if it came to that," Riateh reminded her.

"That can hardly be any comfort to you, Ri," Logan cringed.

"On the contrary, it is strangely comforting. That is the man I fell in love with. The man I gave my heart to. He was generous enough to give his heart to me, as well. Your children were already in his heart when we met. They were a part of him. When I fell in love with him, I fell in love with them - all of them."

Logan burst into tears at her generosity. Riateh hugged her and held her through the cascade of tears that poured out of her. It helped her to be able to offer what comfort she could to Logan. It made her feel a little less helpless. She knew Cameron was alive, she could still *feel* him. She knew he had far too much to live for NOT to come back to them. He was so strong. His strength would see himself and Chelsea through whatever they were going through - and it would bring them both home.

GENII REBEL PLANET

"Listen to me, Cadet, and I'm serious here... If and when we get the chance you are to _run_ , not walk, to either the jumper or the gate and dial home."

"I can't go without you, Uncle Cam!" she protested.

"You CAN and you WILL sweetpea. If I have to stay behind and draw them away from you, that's what I'll do. YOU are the leverage they will use against your parents, not me. We have got to get you back home!" he whispered urgently.

"But, they'll... kill you!" she whispered back.

"No they won't. Besides, I thought you were worried about your brother?" he reminded her.

He felt bad as her eyes clouded over with concern. "I am..."

"No hesitation, no more questions, no arguments. We go together if we can, but if not, you go _alone_ , is that clear?" he looked her right in the eye.

She nodded sadly, reaching up to touch his cheek. "Yes sir," she hugged him.

"Now, now, sweetpea, none of that... Your parents need to know that you're safe, and if you have to go through without me, you can still tell them exactly where I am," he pointed out.

"But I don't KNOW where we are!"

Mitchell pointed to the gate, which they could clearly see from their vantage point in their cell. "All we have to do is memorize that last symbol anyone dials when they leave. That's..."

"The point of origin," she finished for him.

"Right. Good girl. You already know the adress for home, so that last symbol is all you need to get out of here."

"All WE need, Uncle Cam," she corrected him.

"Yes, darlin' but promise me you won't fight me on this. We won't have time to argue if the opportunity arises. I tell you to run, you RUN, don't look back, just run, and then you tell your parents where to find the people who took us. Right?"

"Yes sir," she reluctantly agreed.

"You'll be helping me MORE by doing as I say, than anything else you could do, Chels."

"Okay."

"Good girl," he squeezed her tighter as he rocked her from side to side on his lap.

"Uncle Cam?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you," she said softly.

He pulled back to look her in the eye again. "I love you, too, sweetpea. Always and forever."

"How are we going to get a look at the DHD? We can't see it from here."

Mitchell paused for a moment. "Well, I kind of get the impression that Sora likes you... A lot. I can tell that it's really bugging her to have you locked up in here for days on end. Sooner or later, she's going to cave and let both of us out of here to stretch our legs."

"Why won't you just let me go, just for a little while, then we won't have to wait so long..." she trailed off at the expression on his face.

"Not a chance, baby girl. There is no way I am letting you out of my sight until you step through that gate," he said vehemently.

She bit her lip to keep from smiling.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing, nothing..." she grinned openly now.

"Spill it!" he ordered with mock gruffness.

"It's just... You're not REALLY afraid of my parents, are you?" she asked. They were the best of friends, closer than close. And he was every bit as big and brave as her father; as brave as her mother, too.

"Darn right I am! Especially your mom! Have you never SEEN her when she's angry? And I mean ANGRY?!"

Chelsea nodded. Her mother could be quite formidable for such a tiny woman. Chelsea had no doubts that many an enemy had underestimated her mother's ability to fight - and had paid the price for it. "Sure, but they love you," she reminded him.

"And I love them. But, the thing that would scare me, is having to tell them that I couldn't keep you safe...If I let anything happen to you..." he looked away and took a deep breath. "I could never forgive myself - and I know THEY could never forgive me."

She threw her arms around his neck. "They wouldn't... hurt... you, Uncle Cam."

"Not physically, no, although they'd have every right to...But THEY'D be hurting, right down to their souls, if anything happened to you - so would I, by the way - and I'd be the one responsible for causing that pain."

"But you wouldn't be...The Genii would be...THEY took us!" she reminded him.

"Yes baby, they did, and ultimately they would be held accountable, but you are MY responsibility, at least while you're in my care. That makes me the one to blame if I let them - or anyone - hurt you."

"You love me very much, don't you?" she asked, a serene smile on her face.

"More than I can say. And I have since before you were born," he kissed her on the forehead.

ATLANTIS

Logan left Nic (in Riateh's capable, loving hands) long enough to go and check in on her other children. All three were fine, if not missing their parents. She cuddled with each of them, separately for a little while, assuring them that Nic would be feeling better soon, and that Daddy was safe and would be bringing Chelsea and Mitchell home soon. She just hoped she sounded more convincing than she felt.

After she left them, she wandered out to the pier to compose herself and do a lot of thinking. Caldwell found her there, quite literally looking like she was hanging on to her last nerve by a thread. Even though he took heavy steps, to alert her to his presence, she still jumped about a foot in the air when he reached out and touched her shoulder.

"Easy, Lo, it's just me," he cooed.

She took a few deep breaths to calm her breathing. "Steve."

"I'd ask how you're holding up, but I can see for myself how tightly you're wound."

"That obvious?" she tried to make light of it.

"Only to those who know you very well," he smiled.

"Any news?" she asked, as always.

"No sweetheart, I'm sorry."

She nodded and looked back out to sea. She hadn't found the calm here that she normally did.

"Logan?"

"Hmmm?"

"We're all alone out here, you're safe...Why don't you unload some of it onto me?" he asked.

"You've got enough on your shoulders..." she shrugged.

"I've got broad shoulders," he reminded her.

She looked up at him and smiled wryly. "That you do," she agreed.

"So why don't you cry on one of them, or both, if you need to?" he prodded.

"I'm afraid I might not stop... And if I can't stop, I can't help my son. I already can't help my daughter...and...and..."

That did it. The floodgates opened once again and she began to sob uncontrollably. Caldwell took her in his arms and ducked behind a piling, to shield them from any onlookers who might happen to be passing by a window. Cradling Logan on his lap, he simply held her, rocked her, and occasionally whispered comforting words. She was the strongest person he knew, that he'd ever known, but even she needed a release once in a while. And since Sheppard couldn't be there for her right now, or Mitchell, or Daniel or...the list went on...At least he could be there for her to lean on.

After she had calmed somewhat, and her tears began to subside, she pulled back to look up apologetically into his rich, chocolate brown eyes. "I'm sorry Steve...You must think I'm a total cream puff..." she joked.

"Never," he assured her.

"You have more important things to do than to sit and coddle one of your officers, who SHOULD know better than to fall apart in front of her superior."

He leaned back and took her face in his massive hands. "And I do... But if that officer also happens to be a dear friend...Then it is my pleasure, and my honor to offer whatever comfort I can in her time of need."

A few more tears fell as she leaned forward and, ever so gently, brushed his cheek with her lips. "Thank you," she whispered softly.

"You're welcome," he murmured.

Then it was over, as quickly as it had begun. The storm passed and she was back in control again. "But, I'm not the only one hurting right now, and I need to keep that in mind," she brushed herself off and climbed off his lap.

"You've never forgotten that, Logan. Not ever. You are always the last person whose needs you think about," he countered her.

"If only that were true," she said wistfully.

"It IS true. Even now, I'm betting that what all that was about had very little to do with your own needs," he flashed her a challenging look.

"You'd lose that bet, Steve. I NEED to help my son, I NEED to find my daughter and Cameron, I NEED for my family and my loved ones to be safe and secure, and I NEED to do SOMETHING to make all of that happen...And I'm not... I can't..."

"But you ARE, Logan. You _are_. Look at the bigger picture. You sent him out there to find your daughter. That doesn't just help her, it helps both her and Nic. You staying here, to keep your son alive and strong enough to fight, does the same thing. Do you know how responsible she'd feel if anything happened to her brother, after she'd been secretly trying to keep him healthy all this time?"

She gasped. "Oh my God..."

"And don't you believe for one moment that you aren't giving Riateh the same comfort she's been giving you," he admonished her.

She laughed at that. "I seem to be the only one crying, " she pointed out.

"Maybe, for now. She may be worried, but she's also comforted by the knowledge that her husband is a warrior - and a damned good one. YOU, on the other hand, have two very vulnerable children to be concerned about. I don't claim to understand female perspectives all that well, but I'm pretty sure that it's a little different - adults versus kids - am I right?" he asked.

She nodded. "Yeah, I guess you are."

"Then cut yourself some slack, sweetheart. A little meltdown or two will do you some good, once in a while. You don't have to be so strong and brave ALL the time, you know. Let us help you through it," he said.

She nodded again. "I don't know what I'd do without you... All of you."

"Then we'll see to it you never have to," he smiled.

"Steve?"

"Yes?"

"Were we wrong to have children?" she asked out of the blue.

"NO! God, Lo, why would you even think that?" he asked.

She shrugged. "I just... Look at our lives, Steve. Look at how many times their lives have been put at risk because of what John and I do. Look how many times they've had to be separated from us. Sure, they're USED to it, since that's all they've ever known, but why should they HAVE to be? Why should they have to settle for anything less than normal parents, who are home with their kids every day, and who aren't in constant peril? How is what we've done to them...fair?"

"Logan... What you've given them..." he shook his head. "You gave them life, you GIVE them love, a home with two loving parents - insanely in love and devoted to one another - you give them a wonderful home and you've surrounded them with so many people who love and care about them...Your children never feel unloved or unwanted - even when you have to be away from them. They have Janet and Simmons and cousins... They have a second father in Mitchell... Adopted Aunts and Uncles all around them. They are seeing things and learning things and DOING things that no other child could possibly imagine, and they will be stronger, wiser adults for it when they've grown up. As for normal?" he shrugged. "What IS normal, Lo?"

She shrugged, completely at a loss.

"Normal is all about perception, isn't it? What is normal for your kids, my kids, Daniel's, Elizabeth's, Cameron's...THIS is normal. This is familiar, this is safe, this is home. These are the children who will one day, in some form or another, be responsible for the protection of Earth and Pegasus and who knows how many other galaxies?! They are the ones who will be able to lead or to guide future leaders, because they know what's out here, and how important it is. Never doubt that. "

GENII REBEL PLANET

"I'm only agreeing to this because of the child," Sora explained to Mitchell as they walked along.

He was bound, with his hands behind him and escorted by four armed men at all times while out of the cell. Chelsea had not been bound, as she was a child. Despite Mitchell's (and her own) warnings to the contrary, they could not believe that such a small child could pose any threat to them. She had steadfastly and stubbornly refused to go anywhere without Mitchell by her side, though. It pained Sora to see that the child actually thought she would harm her. In point of fact, Sora was completely enchanted by the young girl.

"Whatever the reason, so long as you know, she stays with me," Mitchell arched an eyebrow at her.

Sora smiled. "You say that as if I don't have the power to change that, Mitchell."

"Not without killing me, you don't. And even then, I'd come back and haunt you till the day you die."

"Haunt me?" she looked at him curiously.

"As a ghost... You know... A spirit that hasn't moved on?" he explained.

"Oh, I see. What if I simply had my men shoot you with a stunner?" she asked, almost playfully.

"All hell would still break loose. And not just at my hands. Chelsea is a a sweet and loving child, but you have no idea the hellion you'd awaken in her if you tried to take her away from me," he warned.

"I have a bit of a temper," Chelsea added dryly.

Sora chuckled as she walked beside them. "I will consider myself warned, little one."

"As you should," she replied, trying to sound like Mitchell.

"Oh! Here, come with me Chelsea, these are the flowers I wanted to show you," Sora said excitedly.

Chelsea stopped walking and snaked her arm through Mitchell's. With a stubborn expression on her face, she refused to budge.

"What's wrong, little one?" she asked.

"Not without Uncle Cam," she said firmly.

"He can come as close as the walkway there, I promise I am not going to harm either one of you."

Chelsea looked from her to the area where she'd pointed. She could tell that, from that angle, she'd have a perfect and unobstructed view of the DHD. She looked up at Mitchell and winked. Pleading with him, with only her eyes, she tried to convey that message to him. He looked over at the flower beds, just catching sight of the DHD out of the corner of his eye and understood what she was trying to tell him. He pretended to think about it, then slowly nodded affirmatively.

"Good," Sora reached out a hand for hers. "Come."

Chelsea feigned interest in the different species of flowers Sora pointed out, but her attention was focused primarily on the DHD. Not her eyes, but her attention. There was a group of soldiers preparing to leave, so she knew this to be the perfect time to get what they'd been hoping for - the last symbol - the point of origin. Chelsea picked up a flower that had fallen to the path, and positioning herself so that Sora was between her and the DHD, so no one would think twice about her looking in that direction, she began asking her questions about the flower, holding it up to Sora so she could smell it. She watched as one by one, the symbols were illuminated on the DHD. Finally, the last symbol lit up and the wormhole engaged. Chelsea burned that symbol's shape into her mind, so that she'd never forget it.

"There's something else I want to show you, little one, come along," Sora said, taking her hand and leading her down the path.

Chelsea looked back at Mitchell, who followed about three paces behind them. Far enough so that Sora would feel comfortable talking to the girl, but not so far that he couldn't protect her, if the need arose. He caught Chelsea's triumphant smile and winked back at her, his face beaming with pride. She was a natural. Although it pained him to even consider the thought, it sure looked as though Chelsea were born to follow in her parents footsteps. That she would, one day, be leading teams through the stargate and protecting Earth and Pegasus from bad guys - like the Genii. Although, come to think about it, he really didn't hold out much hope for the survival of the Genii once Sheppard and Logan found out who had taken their daughter.

The fragile truce erected between their two peoples would be dismantled for what Sora was doing now. Not only were they plotting galactic domination of Pegasus, but they had kidnapped two Lanteans, one of them a child, no less. Not to mention WHOSE child. He knew, without question, that authorized or not, Logan and Sheppard would slowly, but surely and methodically wipe the Genii military from existence, and he, Mitchell, would be right there beside them.

The guards kept a close watch over him, though he behaved as a model prisoner. He pretended to be focused solely on the child a few paces ahead of him, but he was taking in all of his surroundings with a keen soldier's eye. He was mentally marking the placement of troops, and weapons, and he was also gauging the distance from the cell they were kept in to the DHD, the gate and the jumper.

He smiled to himself when he saw the jumper. None of her people had, so far been able to activate it. They had barely been able to fly it here, he'd heard. Were it not for he jumpers automated pilot mode when nearing a gate, they may never have gotten the jumper there to begin with. Sora had questioned him several times about the controls and the power source, but he always refused to answer. She knew that until and unless she could find one of her own people who possessed the Ancient gene, that jumper would be totally useless to them.

"Would it be so bad for you to have to stay here, with me?" Sora was asking when he turned his attention back to them.

His back stiffened and his eyes turned cold.

"Yes ma'am, it would."

He had to admit it. Sora looked saddened by her response. "Have I not treated you well?"

Chelsea gazed up at her. "You mean besides locking us up in that musty old cell?"

Sora smiled. "I thought you understood my reasons for that."

Chelsea nodded. "I do, but that doesn't mean I LIKE it. Besides, I have a family back home, who love me. And I love them, and I miss them very much. So does Uncle Cam. We want to go home, ma'am. And nothing you say will ever make me want to stay," she ran back and threw her arms around Mitchell's waist, burying her face against him.

SEVERAL HOURS LATER

Mitchell held Chelsea securely in his arms as she slept. She'd been a real trooper over the past few days. He knew her parents would be so proud of how well she'd handled herself - and how upset they'd be with him that he'd allowed her to be taken in the first place. Guilt gnawed at him every single day. Guilt that he hadn't seen the attack coming, that he hadn't been able to stop her from being taken and that he hadn't found a way to get her out of this cell and through the Stargate.

There were far too many of them for him to take on alone, and he would never risk Chelsea getting caught in the crossfire. There was also the problem of how to get back to Atlantis, even if - make that WHEN - they escaped from their cell. Sora's men had confiscated all their belongings, including the IDC remotes. They'd have no way to let Atlantis know that THEY were the ones knocking at the door without those remotes. It was looking more and more like they would HAVE TO use the jumper for their escape. If Sora's men hadn't dismantled the thing by now, he might be able to contact Atlantis via radio once the wormhole connected. IF it was still intact.

OUTSIDE

"Sora, this is madness! We must dispose of them!" Denil said harshly.

"No!"

"Do you know what the Lanteans will do if they catch us with them?" he asked.

"I am more concerned, as you should be, about what they would do if they found us WITHOUT them. The Lanteans would be less inclined to seek retribution if their people were unharmed. If we kill them, especially the child..." she paused, unnerved by even the thought. "They would not hesitate to wipe us out."

"We are stronger now," Denil argued.

"Yes, but we are not strong enough. Our weapons do not compare with theirs, you saw this during the coup. Something which could not have happened without them, Denil."

He nodded. "Agreed. But that does not change the fact that their mere presence here puts our plans at risk - not to mention our lives."

"There is no help for that now. We must keep them safe, in the unlikely event that their disappearance is traced to us. All we can hope for is that they assume they were taken by the Wraith."

"You WANT to keep them here, or the child at least," his tone was accusing.

"She is a delightful child, Denil. Smart and brave..." she trailed off with a smile.

"You are far too enamored of her, Sora. Remember her parentage," he warned.

"She is young, still. Perhaps..."

"Perhaps _what_? Perhaps she will forget where she came from? Who her parents are?"

"Why not? With the proper grooming, she could be a fine warrior for the Genii."

Denil gasped. "Are you mad?!"

"She is a Sheppard, Denil, which means she possesses the gene needed to operate that jumper out there - and who knows what else? We will have to separate her from Mitchell, of course, he would never allow us to..."

"Manipulate her?" he cut her off.

"Re-train her," Sora countered. "She could be instrumental in helping us to achieve our goals."

"I have seen the child with Mitchell. She is far too devoted to him to turn so easily. She looks to him as she would a father."

Sora nodded. "Which is why we need to separate them. She may fight it, at first, but if she perceives a threat to his safety or his life..." she trailed off meaningfully.

"Then she will be more cooperative," he finished for her. He was beginning to see the merit in keeping their captives alive now. "She will resent you, though. I do not think that is what you want from her," he surmised correctly.

"Perhaps. At first. But, she will eventually learn to see me as her..."

"Mother?" he asked.

"Why not?" Sora shrugged.

He shook his head but said nothing further to dissuade her. Her reasoning, if a little flawed, had its merits. "Shall we take the child tonight then?" he asked.

She nodded. "I'm betting he won't give her up without a fight, so you should go in with stunners. But before you do, I want your men to outfit one of the rooms in my dwelling with bars on the window and make sure the door can be secured from the outside. She will, at least at first, try to get away."

"Consider it done," he saluted, then turned on his heel and walked out the door.

Sora took a few deep breaths. "I am sorry little one, but I'm afraid you will have to get used to living as a Genii from now on. I cannot let you go..." she said to herself.

Chelsea awoke with a start. She'd been dreaming about the symbols she'd seen the Genii soldiers punch in to the DHD. She hadn't just memorized the last symbol, she'd memorized them all. She was also dreaming about her parents and her siblings. It almost felt like she could reach out and touch her mothers face when...

"Uncle Cam?" she whispered urgently.

He woke immediately. "What is it sweetpea?" he asked, looking around the deserted room.

"They're coming to take me away from you," she said, panic in her voice.

"Were you dreaming, baby?" he asked.

"Yeah, no... I just know they're coming - they want to use me to start the jumper or something, and...and...if I don't they will hurt you!" she gasped.

"Okay, baby, okay, I believe you. But we're not going to let that happen..." he began looking around frantically for anything they might use for a weapon.

There was nothing. At least not in the room. His eyes fell on the cell door and, more specifically, the lock. "Chels, honey, how many other things have you tried to do? You know, with your mind?" he asked.

She shrugged. "What do you mean?"

"If you focused, concentrated REAL hard on that lock, do you think you could...force it open...with your mind?" he asked.

She looked at the door, then back at him and shrugged. "I can try."

"Good girl," he sat her up next to him while he pulled on his boots. "Just close your eyes and try to picture the lock. then picture it opening..." he trailed off at the telltale click of the lock mechanism opening.

"Like that?" she smiled up at him.

"EXACTLY like that. You're a genius!" he kissed her on the top of the head and quietly led her out of the cell.

He peeked out the window, trying to get a count of how many guards were nearby and how many there were around the jumper.

"Okay baby, listen to me very carefully, this is gonna be real tricky..."

ATLANTIS

Logan's eyes popped open and she sat up with a start. She'd been dreaming about Chelsea until, all of a sudden, gate symbols kept popping into her mind; one right after the other. Seven of them. Over and over again until they were seared into her memory.

"Chelsea?" she whispered to the darkness.


	98. Chapter 98

GENII REBEL PLANET

"If I can just get one of their stunners, we'll have a better chance to..." he froze in mid-sentence.

He saw the nearest guard's stunner detach from his belt and come flying through the air toward them. More specifically towards Chelsea's outstretched hand. It had happend so quickly and so smoothly that the guard didn't even realize his stunner had been taken. Mitchell looked down at Chelsea in awe, smiling wickedly.

"Nice," he told her.

She beamed up at him and handed him the weapon.

"You know, we're going to HAVE to talk when we get back home," he warned her.

"I had a feeling," she sighed.

"Stay right beside me, sweetpea. Do exactly as I say, alright?"

She nodded. "Yes sir."

Mitchell aimed the stunner at the nearest guard and fired, taking him down without a sound, before moving on to the next guard and the next and the next. They'd almost made it al the way to the jumper when another guard came running around the corner and barrelled into Mitchell, sending both he and Chelsea flying. Mitchell and the guard ended up in a tangled heap, each fighting for control of the stunner, while Chelsea was thrown several feet away by the force of the impact. The commotion had caught the attention of several other guards, who came running to their comrade's defense. These guards now stood between her and Mitchell.

"Ah FRELL!" she muttered as she saw this, looking around desperately for a way to get to her Uncle.

Three of the guards began advancing on her. In a blind panic, she closed her eyes and pushed out with her arms, as if to keep them away. What she missed by closing her eyes, was the sight of the three guards suddenly knocked off their feet and sent flying through the air. Unfortunately, they all landed right on top of Mitchell and the guard he'd been fighting with.

"Crap!" she yelped after opening her eyes.

Mitchell wasn't as up on his Ancient as Logan or Sheppard, but he knew a few key phrases and he used some of that knowledge to order Chelsea to run for the jumper. She paused only for a heartbeat before obeying him, her heart breaking with the knowledge that he would not be able to make it there himself, as he was now struggling with four Genii soldiers.

"Stop her!" Sora shouted as she came out and saw Chelsea running full-tilt toward the jumper.

Sora and three more guards ran after the child while another two joined the struggle against Mitchell.

"Run, Chels, run!" Mitchell hollered, spurring her on.

That earned him a well-placed punch across the jaw, sending him crashing to the ground. He fought off two of the guards and regained his feet, only to be driven back down to the ground by four others.

"Go, baby, GO!" he hollered again before one of the guards punched him in the gut hard enough to knock the wind out of him.

Chelsea reached the jumper and ran up the ramp, stopping at the top to look back for Mitchell when she heard him hollering at her to go. With a sob, she ran toward the cockpit and hit the controls to close and lock the door between the cockpit and the rear of the jumper. However, Sora had also gained the ramp and hurled herself forward before Chelsea could close the ramp hatch. Chelsea was now in the cockpit and Sora, along with one other guard, were in the rear compartment. Fighting back tears, Chelsea began to dial the gate address for Atlantis.

The guards began working Mitchell over good and hard, bloodying and bruising his face as they went, until Denil ordered them to stop. Gasping for breath, Mitchell was forced to his knees before Denil, a knife to his throat. Sora pounded on the cockpit door, calling to Chelsea.

"Open this door at once, young lady!" she yelled.

"I'm a little... _busy_..." Chelsea shouted back insolently.

"Listen to me, little one! Take a look outside...NOW! Look at your Uncle Cam... Do you see him?"

Chelsea paused in her dialing and peered out the window. Sora used her radio to order Denil to bring Mitchell in front of the jumper, so Chelsea could see him better. The guards marched him over and forced him back to his knees. Chelsea gasped as she saw the blood running down his face and the way he was gasping for air.

"Uncle Cam," she whimpered.

"I do not wish to harm him, little one, but I _will_ order my men to shoot him if you do not open this door immediately!" Sora told her.

Chelsea gasped in horror. She knew they were capable of doing just that.

Sora ordered Denil to put his radio to Mitchell's mouth so he could tell her to surrender himself. Mitchell never took his eyes from Chelsea's frightened, tear-stained face. He spoke to her, again in Ancient.

"They will not kill me... Go! Now!" he said.

"What did you say to her?!" Denil demanded to know.

"I told her you guys wear womens underwear," he quipped, earning him another swift punch to the face.

"Do you want to be responsible for the death of your beloved Uncle?" Sora prodded.

Chelsea sobbed, pressing a hand against the windshield of the jumper, as if she could reach out and touch Mitchell. He nodded at her and she resumed dialing.

UNKNOWN PLANET

"Honey are you sure?" Sheppard's voice crackled over the radio.

"Yes... No, but... what other leads do we have?" she asked.

"Good point. How's Nic?" his voice was tinged with concern.

"He's holding his own, John, but..." she trailed off.

"We're on our way. I'll call you as soon as we know anything," he said softly.

She smiled wanly and nodded. "I'm counting on it," she murmured. "Devane out."

Sheppard turned to the others and took a deep breath to compose his thoughts. "Alright. We go in and we go in hot. Stunners only, for now. We want people alive who can TELL us where they've taken Colonel Mitchell and... my daughter."

"Jumpers first?" asked Ronan.

"Yes. Quick recon, make sure the immediate area is secure then the rest of us go through on foot."

Martin and Simmons each approached Sheppard as the others made preparations to leave.

"We'll find them John," Simmons clapped his brother on the shoulder.

Sheppard nodded. "We're getting close," he murmured.

"Chelsea is a strong, resourceful kid, John. She can handle herself, and with Mitchell looking out for her? Hell, *I* wouldn't want to be the enemy!" he flashed Sheppard a brilliant smile.

Sheppard nodded again. "Yeah...She is...And Cameron WILL protect her, no matter what."

"We'll get them back. And when we do, we'll make whoever took them pay," Simmons said grimly.

Within minutes, the large strike force was ready to move. McKay dialed the gate address given to them by Logan and... nothing.

"McKay?" Sheppard growled impatiently.

"I don't know," he huffed in frustration. "We can't get a lock."

"Why?!" Sheppard demanded.

"I don't know!" McKay whined. "Either the gate is already open on the other side, or there's something wrong with the address."

"Try it again!" Sheppard barked.

"I am, I am!"

GENII REBEL PLANET

Everyone jumped when the wormhole engaged and the jumper lifted off from the ground. Sora pounded even harder on the door, yelling frantically for her to stop. Chelsea ignored her and flipped the radio on.

"Atlantis base this is jumper twelve," she called out through her tears.

Caldwell was in the control room when the gate activated and ran over to Heller to see who had dialed in. The shield was already firmly in place. "Who is it?" Caldwell asked.

"No IDC yet, sir..."

He was cut off by the sound of a very frightened, very determined young female voice.

"Atlantis base, this is jumper twelve, come in please?" she pleaded.

Caldwell gaped, open-mouthed as he recognized the young voice and he quickly signalled Heller to send for Logan.

"This is Atlantis base, jumper twelve. What's your situation?" he asked, keeping his tone businesslike so as not to frighten her even more.

"General Caldwell?" she croaked. "Sir, this is Chelsea Sheppard. I'm in jumper twelve and...and...Colonel Mitchell has ordered me to come home...without him.

"It's good to hear your voice, young lady, we've been worried about you," he said warmly.

"Thank...thank you sir," she gulped back tears of relief. "I'm sorry but our IDC transmitters were taken from us, could you please...lower the shield...please?" she pleaded.

"Security teams, tighten the perimeter around the gate!" he hollered. "Lower the shield," he ordered Heller.

"Chelsea, honey, I know you can fly that jumper but how are you at controlling it in tight spaces?" he asked.

"I can do it, sir."

"Are you sure? Don't come through too fast, if you can help it," he told her.

"Okay... And Sir?"

"Yes sweetheart?"

"Um...There are...hostiles... on board."

He gasped, shaking his head. "Are you safe?"

"Yes sir, they're locked in the rear compartment'" she replied.

"Good girl," he smiled proudly. "How many?"

"At least two, maybe more."

"We'll be ready, sweetheart, now do what Colonel Mitchell said and come on home," he ordered, gently but firmly.

Sora could hear this conversation and she screamed at Chelsea through the door. "We will KILL him, Chelsea! Do you hear me?"

Chelsea flinched and her hands on the controls began to shake. "General Caldwell, sir?" she called out.

"Yes sweetheart?"

"Permission to fire on the hostiles holding Uncle Cam?" she asked timidly.

Caldwell looked over at Heller in surprise. "Do you know HOW?" he asked.

"Pretty sure, sir."

At that moment, the weapons panel on both sides of the jumper spontaneously opened.

"Can you do it without hitting the Colonel?" he asked, shaking his head in wonder.

She grinned through her tears as she saw that the men were already starting to scatter. "Yes, I can," she replied confidently.

"Permission granted," he shrugged.

"Kill him!" Sora screamed into her radio. "Kill him now!"

"NO!" Chelsea shouted and a drone was instantly launched toward the men holding Mitchell.

Sora screamed as she felt the drone launch and the men outside scattered wildly, including one very surprised Mitchell. Chelsea fired two more drones, hitting the building where she and Mitchell had been held and the main building where the Genii soldiers were housed. Then, without looking back, she did as Mitchell had told her to do: she headed straight for the gate and vanished into the event horizon.

An instant later, she appeared in the Atlantis gateroom, hovering just above the floor. Caldwell and everyone in the control room cheered the moment she appeared, and Chelsea smiled through her tears at seeing all the familiar faces. Caldwell waved, a big grin on his face as he keyed his mic.

"Set down right there, sweetheart," he said.

Chelsea turned the jumper around in a perfect circle, so that the front was now faced toward the Stargate and gently set it down on the floor. The security teams moved in, surrounding the jumper, weapons drawn and ready to fire.

"Okay, good girl. Now just stay put until we have the hostiles," he advised her.

"Yes sir."

GENII REBEL PLANET

Sheppard stood, with one booted foot pressed against the man's neck and the tip of his P-90 in the man's mouth and asked again.

"Where ARE they?"

The man was white as a sheet. His eyes were full of fear but still held a touch of defiance.

"We will not tell you anything," the other man, under Simmon's boot shouted.

"You know," Sheppard glanced over at Bates. "These two don't conduct themselves much like farmers or traders," he observed.

"I was just thinking the same thing, sir," Bates replied.

"No, no... They behave more like... _soldiers_ , don't they?" Sheppard continued.

"That'd be MY assessment," Simmons agreed.

"And the last time we ran into trouble with soldiers who tried to pass themselves off as simple farmers, they were..."

"Genii!" Bates finished for him.

"Exactly," Sheppard's eyes gleamed with hatred.

Both men cringed at that look, even though it was directed at only one of them.

"So you're Genii?" Sheppard asked, pressing his foot down a little harder. "And you're all getting a bit uppity again...?"

Neither man spoke, but they were both very frightened.

Sheppard suddenly dropped down, his knee replacing his foot as he applied even more pressure to the man's neck. He looked the soldier right in the eye and hissed venomously at him.

"That's alright, you don't have to bother trying to deny it. I can smell the Genii stench all over you. So let me make my intentions perfectly clear. Either you tell me where they have taken the two Lanteans, or my people will take that DHD apart and find each and every world you have visited from here. Once they do, we will then go to those worlds and tear them apart piece by piece until we find our people, and we will leave NOTHING behind when we're done. No buildings, no people. Are you starting to get the picture here? Do I have to destroy every Genii city, village or outpost one by one, or are you going to give me what I want?"

He meant what he said. There was no doubt in their minds.

"What if...What if we don't KNOW where your people are?" the man Simmons was stepping on asked.

"Then point me to someone who DOES know!" Sheppard bellowed, digging his knee even deeper into the man's neck.

Lorne's voice came over the radio. "Colonel Sheppard?"

"Sheppard."

"Looks like we missed one hell of a fight, sir. I'm talking drone-fire, sir."

Sheppard froze and glanced over at Simmons. "Where?"

Lorne directed him to the site of charred and still smoldering remains of a building not a hundred yards east of Sheppard's current location. He'd seen several impact craters as well as the destroyed building, but no sign of any people nearby.

"Let's try this again..." Sheppard hissed at his captive, pressing his knee down on the man's neck again.

ATLANTIS

Logan came flying into the gateroom, gaping incredulously at the jumper as she called for a weapon. Inside the rear compartment, Sora and the one guard who made it on board with her waited with dread, knowing that they would soon be exposed to the enemy when the rear hatch opened.

Logan signalled for Heller to remotely lower the ramp and prepared herself for the fight. Fortunately, there were only two of them, so she met with no resistance, initially. Her eyes met and instantly recognized the woman they had helped put into power. For a moment, the two women faced one another without speaking. Then, without a word, Sora raised her gun and pointed it at Logan.

"You know I will fire," Logan warned her.

"Of that I am certain," Sora nodded.

Logan pulled the trigger of her 9-mil and fired, hitting the woman just once, in her right shoulder. Sora couldn't help but drop her gun as her entire arm went numb.

"No," she gasped.

It was clear that her intent was to die, right there, a martyr to her cause, only it appeared that Logan Devane wasn't going to allow her to escape so easily.

After kicking Sora's gun away, Logan then pointed her weapon at the other Genii, while her team dragged Sora out of the jumper and took her to the infirmary. Her eyes were blazing with hatred as she stared up at him. He was more terrified than he'd ever been in his life. Even of the Wraith. He quickly raised his hands to signal surrender. Logan approached, then used the butt of her gun to hit him across the face, knocking him to the ground. "Where...is...Colonel...Mitchell?" she demanded.

He was too frightened to speak. He knew she wouldn't hesitate to kill him, but even more, he knew if he gave her the address, she would lead her people through the Stargate and slaughter every last one of his comrades.

"Tell me!" she shouted, causing him to jump.

"I...I..."

She pulled out the clip, checked it, then popped it back into the 9-mil, slowly and deliberately, her eyes never leaving his.

"You will kill me anyway!" he wailed.

"Not if you tell me where he is!" she yelled.

"I don't believe you!"

"We are not the Genii!" she hissed. "If I tell you I will spare you, then take me at my word. But if you don't tell me where he is..." she cocked the firing mechanism back and pointed the tip right between his eyes.

Something in her eyes, something dark and cold told him that he'd better do as she said. "I'll give you the symbols! I'll give them to you...PLEASE, please, please!" he begged.

Her security team grabbed the man and marched him up to the control room while Logan went to check on Chelsea.

"Chels?" she called through the closed door. "Chelsea, honey, it's Mommy, you can open the door now!"

The door slid open and Chelsea launched herself into her mothers arms, sobbing inconsolably as she wrapped her arms and legs around Logan and refused to let go. Logan cooed and murmured soothingly as she sat on the bench in the rear compartment rocking her daughter on her lap.

"Mommy, Mommy..." she sobbed. "They tried to kill Uncle Cam!" she wailed.

"Tried?" she asked, cold fear gripping her heart.

"I shot at them, to make them let go, but he's still back there! We have to save him!" she cried.

"We will, baby girl, we will. As soon as that man tells us the gate address, I promise to go and get him myself."

Chelsea looked up at her mother. "Yeah?"

"Yeah... And YOU, my brave little cadet, you must go down to the infirmary to be checked out."

"But, I can show you..."

"Absolutely _not_! Besides, your brother needs you right now," she said sternly.

"Nic? Is he..." she trailed off, blushing fiercely, knowing she'd been found out.

"He is very sick, sweetheart, but Dr. Beckett can fix him. In order to do that, Dr. Beckett needs to take some blood samples from you..."

"Anything! I'll do anything!"

Logan smiled and took her face in her hands. "I know sweetie, thank you. Now, I want you to go with Gaines and Foreman here, they'll get you to Dr. Beckett..."

"We've got it!" Caldwell called down to her, as the gate began to dial. "It's the same address you sent Sheppard to check out."

"I love you, sweetpea," Logan kissed her fiercely.

"I love you, too. Go save Uncle Cam!"

Chelsea ran down the ramp to Gaines and Foreman and turned to watch her mother seat herself in the pilot's chair. She keyed her mic and called out to Caldwell as the ramp closed and the jumper rose slightly off the floor.

"I'll clear the road and send you a signal when it's safe to send anyone else through, sir."

"Alright," he agreed as the wormhole engaged.

"Thank you, sir," she said and accelerated through the event horizon.

There was pandemonium on the other side as she came through. Apparently Sheppard and his teams had gotten there ahead of her after all, she realized with a smile. They had cleared most of the hostiles away from the gate area, and Logan quickly informed Caldwell that he could let more ground troops through.

Sheppard heard her voice on the radio and called out to her. "Logan?"

"Aye, Colonel, I couldn't let you have all the fun!" she chuckled.

She sounded much more chipper than she had earlier.

"I haven't found them yet. I caught Cameron's peronal locator beacon for a second, but he's obviously on the move. Are you picking up anything on Chelsea?"

Logan grinned. "Chelsea is safe and at home, John!" she announced. "She's the one who sent me back here for Cam."

Sheppard let out a hoot and laughed happily. "Alrighty then, let's find him!"

The ground troops were rounding up the Genii who had surrendered without a fight. There were still pockets of resistance, however, and it took some time to quell that resistance. Logan scanned the area as she flew in an ever widening search grid until she finally got a lock on the locator chip implanted in his neck. She flew directly toward a stand of dense trees and brush, radioing her position to Sheppard as she went.

Denil dragged the nearly unconscious Mitchell with him as he fled. Mitchell was bleeding profusely from a gunshot wound to his side, and was not in any shape to fight the man off. He heard the jumper swoop in for a landing just behind them as he dragged Mitchell into the forrest. The Lanteans had gotten there far too quickly for the child to have sent them, or for them to have beaten the location out of Sora and the soldier who followed her onto the jumper. How had they learned where the Genii secret base was? For that matter, how had they learned of the Genii's involvement in the capture of their people?

"Hold it!" he heard a female voice behind him and he froze, jamming his gun into Mitchells side as he turned.

He gasped as he came face to face with Logan Devane. He recognized her immediately from when Cowan had, had her kidnapped and held in the Genii prison on his homeworld. His blood turned cold as he looked into her eyes. Logan Devane. Sheppard's wife and, worse... Chelsea Sheppard's mother!

Mitchell began to chuckle between gasps for air. "Oh boy... are YOU screwed!"

"Hey there, Space Cowboy," she greeted Mitchell warmly. "Doesn't look like these folks have been treating you very kindly."

"You can say that again," he agreed.

"Let. Him. Go." Logan fixed Denil with a glare.

"I'd do what she says... She has a bit of a temper," Mitchell advised.

Denil looked from one to the other. "And if I don't?" he sneered.

Logan shot him right between the eyes. "Then I'll kill you," she replied as he fell to the ground.

Mitchell dropped to his knees, still gasping for air. "Nice of you to drop by," he quipped.

"You could have left directions, Cowboy," she muttered dryly, running towards him.

"Oh. Right. Sorry," he coughed and fell backwards onto the ground. "Ow."

"Logan!" she heard Sheppard call out.

"Over here!" she hollered, dropping to her knees to examine Mitchell's wound.

Sheppard barely glanced at the dead Genii officer next to them as he ran up to them. "Hey buddy, long time no see," he chirped brightly.

"I meant to send a postcard," he coughed.

"Okay, okay, enough you two," Logan muttered. "He's been shot, John," she looked back at him.

"It stings a bit, too," Mitchell snarked.

"Let's get him home," Sheppard called to the men following him.

"John... He's bleeding...too much..." she whispered in his ear.

"Sh*t!" Sheppard swore.

"I heard that," Mitchell said weakly.

"Then you know we can't move you like this. That creep did a real number on you, draggin you around like that!" she muttered, casting a hateful glare at the dead man next to them.

"Kale, Bates, get that trash out of here," Sheppard ordered, pointing at the dead soldier.

"Yes sir," they replied, each grabbing a leg and dragging him away from them.

"I have no choice," Logan looked up into Sheppard's eyes.

He was hesitant to agree, not that he really could have stopped her, but he was worried about what healing Mitchell would do to her.

"I know," he whispered back.

"What...?" Mitchell looked from one to the other.

"Chelsea's with Dr. Beckett right now and..."

"NOOOO!" Mitchell cried out, misunderstanding what they meant.

"Cam... What?" Logan looked down at him quizzically as he struggled.

"They hurt... No, no, no... How could they hurt the baby...?!"

"What?" Logan and Sheppard asked.

"God, I'm so sorry you guys... I tried to keep her safe... I swear... I would have died to save her..." tears flowed freely down his cheeks.

"But..."

"NO! Leave me! Go help Chels!" he demanded.

Logan took his face in her hands and forced him to look at her. "Cam! Chelsea is fine. A little scared, but she's fine. They didn't hurt her."

He began to calm, a little. "She... is?"

"Yes, I promise," she said, stroking his face as she wiped his tears.

"Then why is she with Beckett?" he asked, still somewhat unsure.

Logans brow furrowed with concern. "Nic..."

"What's wrong with Nic?" he asked.

"He's very sick, Cam."

"Then you should be healing HIM, not me!" he said vehemently.

"I...can't..." she admitted sadly. "He needs a bone marrow transplant."

"Oh God," he winced.

"Chelsea is likely a perfect match for him and now that she's home..." she trailed off, forcing a brave smile across her mouth.

"You still need to go," he insisted.

"We'll ALL go," Sheppard said. "As soon as you're able."

"But..."

Logan put her hand over his mouth. "Shhh... I need to concentrate."

She placed one hand on his forehead and another on his chest, closed her eyes and focused on repairing the damage done to his body by the Genii bullet. She could feel the bullet "backing" out of his body and then the tissue repairing itself as it did. Mitchell's breathing became a little easier and the pain began to fade. Logan gasped and started to fall forward over him, but Sheppard dropped to his knees and caught her, pulling her back into his arms and holding her tightly against him as he looked down at a wide-eyed Mitchell.

"Wow...THAT was...weird," he said.

"Better?" Logan asked wearily.

"Much," he smiled, taking one of her hands in his. "Thank you."

She shrugged and smiled back. "Anything for you."

"No walking just yet, Cam," she said when he tried to get up.

"But..."

"Your body is still weak from blood loss... Mike, help him to the jumper?" she asked.

"Yes ma'am." he took an arm and helped Mitchell to his feet.

"How about you, Sparks? You okay?" Sheppard asked.

"Yeah..." she smiled as he helped her to her feet.

She felt a little wobbly, though, and knew she might not make it to the jumper on her own.

"Maybe a piggyback ride would be in order?" she looked up at him.

He grinned and turned his back to her. "Hop on."

She climbed onto his back, wrapping her legs around his waist as she held onto his shoulders.

As he made his way through the trees he couldn't resist teasing her a bit.

"You know..." he began. "THIS is a lot more fun when you're in FRONT!"

"Yeah? Well, maybe we can do that LATER, when everything has calmed down," she murmured in his ear and then kissed the side of his neck.

Simmons had Mitchell safely secured in her jumper when they got there. Sheppard helped Logan into the pilot's chair and paused to look into her eyes.

"You sure you can fly this?" he asked.

She nodded. "Yes, I'm okay. We'll meet you back in Atlantis," she assured him.

"Okay, hon. I'll be right on your six."

She grinned wickedly. "Promises, promises..."

She took off as soon as Sheppard and Simmons went back to the other jumper. Bates stayed with her, to keep an eye on Mitchell, who was protesting that he was fine. Carter, Daniel, Teal'c, Teyla and Ronan were left in charge of rounding up enemy combatants for further interrogation later.

ATLANTIS THE FOLLOWING DAY

Sheppard, Logan and Mitchell watched Nic and Chelsea as they slept in beds pulled side by side. Nic was responding well to the treatment and Chelsea had been a trooper throughout the painful extraction process. Logan remained by her side, easing her pain as the doctors, who'd been brought in from St. Jude's Hospital back on Earth, worked on her and then on Nic. The specialists hadn't been told WHERE they were going, only that it was a top-secret military facility. They' d been blindfolded, of course, and taken directly from the gateroom down to the infirmary upon their arrival.

They were, all of them, surprised that such a top-secret medical facility would be housing children, but they asked very few questions, aside from those medically necessary to their young patient. They were also pleasantly surprised, and encouraged, to find their young patient as strong as he was, for one so young and having such a grave illness. They assured Logan and Sheppard that, based on his condition and the fact that the donor was a perfect five-point match, Nic had an excellent chance for a full recovery.

Mitchell had brought Tommy and the twins to visit their elder brother and sister, and they'd fallen asleep, each in one adult lap. Logan snuggled Scott against her as she rested her head on Sheppard's shoulder. Mitchell held Cadence and Sheppard held Tommy. None of them were quite ready to breathe a sigh of relief, yet, but they were just happy to be together, and safe. They hadn't really had a chance to talk to Mitchell, yet, about all that had happened to he and Chelsea, but they knew he'd been debriefed by Caldwell and Weir.

"Cam?" Logan whispered.

He dipped his head and looked over at her. "Yeah?"

"Thank you," she and Sheppard said in unison.

"For what?" he asked.

"For keeping her safe," Logan replied.

"For getting her out of there," Sheppard chimed in.

"You don't owe me any thanks, guys," he shook his head.

"Yes, we do," they countered.

"Cam, you kept our baby safe...You didn't allow them to hurt her."

"By allowing them to capture us in the first place, it hurt her!" he whispered, still angry with himself.

"Did you see it coming?" Sheppard asked.

"No. But I should have!"

Logan shook her head. "How did they get you?"

"Stunners."

"Any warning?" Sheppard asked.

"No. I didn't even see them before we got hit," he gritted his teeth.

"Then how do you think you could have prevented it?" Logan asked, arching an eyebrow at him.

"I should have been more alert!" he hissed.

"If this is anyone's fault, it's mine," Sheppard said. "I was just there with my team. We're the ones who deemed it a safe place."

"Oh come ON you two!" Logan scolded. "How were any of us to know that the Genii would suddenly set up camp there, a day after we left? We all know that if there's one thing the Genii are good at, it's avoiding detection - especially if one isn't lookig for or expecting them to be there! Neither one of you are to blame. And Cam... You kept her safe, she told us as much. And when it looked like they were going to separate the two of you, you found a way to get her out of harm's way. You took a bullet to protect her, for crying out loud!"

Sheppard and Mitchell exchanged sheepish glances.

"I love her, you know?" Mitchell said.

"We know," they replied together.

"She was amazing out there," he grinned proudly.

"Yeah?" Sheppard tried to hide a proud smile.

"The things she can do...The abilities she has..." he shook his head. "We...uh...we're gonna have our hands full with that one," he warned.

"So it appears," Logan nodded.

"She knew that Nic was sick...Well, SICKER..." he told them. "It was like she could feel it, or something."

"Well, she had been healing him for months in secret, I'm not surprised there'd be some kind of connection between them," Logan replied.

"Yeah, I gave her an earful about that," Mitchell chuckled.

"Good!" Sheppard and Logan said.

"That gate address we went to, the one Logan told us about..." Sheppard began.

"What address?"

"I was sleeping and all of a sudden these gate symbols started flashing through my head. I kind of got the feeling that Chelsea was trying to tell me something, so I sent John there to check it out."

Sheppard nodded. "That's where we found you."

Mitchell nodded, thinking back. "I had her look at the DHD when a group of soldiers were going through one time, I told her to memorize the point of origin symbol, so she'd know what to dial to get back here...Maybe she memorized the whole thing and somehow... reached out to you?" Mitchell suggested.

"Maybe," they agreed.

"See, that's what I'm talking about with our girl there! She even managed to unlock the door to our cell, with just a thought. AND..." he said excitedly. "I saw her push a bunch of guys away without even touching them!"

"You're right, we definitely have our hands full," Sheppard said.

"Just imagine what she could do when she wants to start dating and you two try to tell her NO?!" she teased them.

Both men's faces turned to stone at the thought. "Never!"


	99. Chapter 99

Caldwell and Sheppard were interrogating the Genii soldier brought to Atlantis by Chelsea the week before. Although Caldwell seemed very gruff and cold, to him, Kolet was much more intimidated by his junior officer, Sheppard. He knew the man's reputation, and that of his wife, whom he was sure would also be paying him a visit, to confront him about his people taking their daughter.

He'd been staunchly in favor of returning both the child and her adult companion as soon as he learned that they were Lantean, let alone so closely associated with the infamous Sheppards. He knew nothing good would come from them holding onto the Lanteans, and he'd been right. He thought Sora would agree with him, but she seemed so taken with the child. Almost as if she were using her to replace the child she'd recently lost prior to its birth, just after the loss of her husband, at the hands of the Wraith.

He'd warned Sora against sending their men to THAT planet as well. There was no doubt that the Wraith were fewer in number, since the Lanteans had come, but there were still a great many Wraith out there. No planet, unprotected by the Lanteans, could really be considered safe. He'd told her as much, but she'd argued that they would never regain the leadership over the galaxy the Genii had once enjoyed if they depended solely on the Lanteans for protection and deliverance. They needed to be as strong, or stronger, than the Lanteans to be able to regain their rightful place as the dominant power in the galaxy. Their once strong and proud coalition of planets had been destroyed by the Wraith, but Sora wanted to be the one to rebuild and restore that power base her ancestors once enjoyed.

And so they had begun to rebuild their armies, in secret. They had no intention or desire to tell the Lanteans of their plans, for fear that they would stop them. Sora had established base camps on ten different worlds by the time they came to the world where they'd found Mitchell and the child. That had been their undoing. If she had followed his suggestion and simply left them there, stunned and unconscious, and then cleared out their base camp, which they HAD to do anyway, then they never would have been discovered in the first place. The Lanteans would never be the wiser. Mitchell and the child would have woken up exactly where they fell and simply wondered what had happened. There would have been nothing there to tie them to that planet.

Why hadn't Sora listened to him?! There were still eight worlds out there, with small Genii armies training for the day when they would be big enough, and powerful enough, to seize power throughout the galaxy. Unfortunately, for him, he knew the location of every single one. It was unfortunate for him because he knew they would eventually get the information from him - one way or another. It was not a prospect he relished. He had seen the Lanteans fairness and generosity in action, despite how badly the previous regime had treated them before. At the time of the coup, they could have simply wiped every single Genii from existence, military and civilian alike, but they didn't. He wanted to believe that they wouldn't now. He WANTED to, but he was afraid. The Genii did not trust easily.

If he gave them the locations to the remaining secret bases, they would go out and destroy them all, he knew this for a fact. Would they, then, turn their attention to the Genii homeworld and obliterate, as they had the capability to do, every last person on the planet? Sora believed that they would. She'd spent more time with them than any other Genii. Others on the ruling council believed her simply because of that fact. And none on the council wished to govern their planet(s) based on rules set forth by the Lanteans. Though, to be fair to the Lanteans, they had done exactly as they'd said they would. Once the ruling council was established, they'd withdrawn their own forces and left the Genii to their own devices. They'd even installed a Lantean shield and cloaking device to protect them from invasion by the Wraith. To him, they had fulfilled their word and were the most powerful ally they could ever hope to have.

But the Genii did not WANT allies. They wanted power. Subjects to rule over. For that to happen, they needed to supplant the Lanteans as the growing power in the galaxy. They needed weapons and ships and armies to subdue the peoples of other worlds. And they needed to accomplish this all without alerting the Lanteans to what they were doing. They had failed. He'd predicted this, but he was loyal to his own kind and, once the decision was made, he was duty bound to follow the edicts of the ruling council.

The Lanteans were holding all the remaining Genii soldiers on Fontinen and Galdir, and they captured anyone else who was unlucky enough to step through the gate on either world. He wondered how many, if any, would give them the location of the other worlds where their armies trained. Very few people knew ALL the locations, but if enough people talked, they would eventually gather all the addresses they needed. Even though he knew this, he still resisted - out of loyalty - telling the Lanteans the information they wanted. That resistance was somewhat lessened when he saw Sheppard walk into the room and fix him with an icy glare.

"You kow we're going to find out anyway." Sheppard said.

Kolet nodded. "I am afraid so."

"Then why not just tell us what we want to know?" Caldwell asked.

"I...I...do not want to be the one who..."

"You don't want to be considered a traitor?" Sheppard asked.

"That is correct."

"You wouldn't be."

He looked up at Sheppard, disbelieving. "But..."

"No, the REAL traitors of your people are the ones who decided to break the treaty between Lantea and Genii. The ones your people trusted to lead them in a new direction following the ouster of Cowan and his band of merry bad guys," Sheppard informed him.

"Clearly, that trust was misplaced. By them and by us," Caldwell added.

"Then you are going to destroy Genii along with our military outposts and training camps."

"If you'd asked me that while my daughter, and friend, were still missing, the answer might be different. As it stands right now? No. It has never been our desire or intent to destroy any culture - aside from the Wraith of course. I'd even be willing to bet that the majority of your people disagree with their leaders plans for galactic domination, too. As would, I'm sure, the countless other people who inhabit this galaxy."

"You seem to have the same plans," he pointed out.

"We don't want to rule the galaxy, Kolet. We never have. We would like to keep it safe, for all humans. We're big believers in self-determination. If the Genii wish to behave a certain way TOWARDS THEIR OWN PEOPLE, that's just fine. It's when they try to take over and run other civilizations that we have a problem."

Kolet studied his face intently. He did seem sincere. Of course he'd always thought so before, but...

"We are not going to go in there and start killing civilians, Kolet. We could have done that before and been done with you. We're not about to punish thousands of people over the actions of a select few."

"I WANT to believe that."

"Well I can't force you to, but I CAN force you to give me the location of all your secret military installations. I'd rather NOT, but I can and I will - if you force me to."

Before he could respond, Logan walked in. He turned white as a sheet, remembering how she'd dispatched Sora without a second thought. Her eyes were fixed on him the moment she came into the room, and they never left him.

"Okay, I'll tell you!" he said, visibly trembling at the sight of her.

She looked up at Sheppard and then at Caldwell and smiled warmly. "Was it something I said?" she asked sweetly.

Once they had the location of the eight remaining secret Genii bases, their first item of business was to confront the Genii Ruling Council. They did this while simultaneously dispatching troops to the first two planets on their list. Stealth and surprise were there greatest weapons, initially. They didn't want anyone, on any of those planets to know that the Lanteans were coming to quash their plans for galactic domination.

The members of the council were slightly wary when a large contingent of Lanteans, led by General Caldwell requested permission to meet with them. More disconcerting than their arrival, however, was the fact that the shield device, set in place by the Lanteans following the Coup, seemed to malfunction when the Lanteans dialed in. Had they wanted to keep them out, there was no way they could have. McKay assured the Genii engineer he would "take a look at it" to see what went wrong.

Scores of troops were waiting on board the Daedalus, to be transported down to the planet as soon as Caldwell gave the signal. It had been decided that neither Sheppard or Mitchell would accompany him to the Genii homeworld, in the event that someone there might realize that Mitchell, along with Sheppard's daughter, had been rescued and then sound the alarm before the Lanteans were ready. Both Sheppard and Mitchell were each leading troops on the strike against the secret Genii bases instead.

Caldwell, Lorne, Teyla, Daniel and Carter led their contingent into the council chambers, while McKay and a small contingent of "scientists" remained in the Genii control center, ostensibly to try and determine why the shield mechanism malfunctioned. In truth, McKay was using his back-door access to the Genii computer system to reset control codes throughout the city, which would allow the Lanteans complete control over everything. Even if some Genii managed to slip through their carefully placed net, they would have no way of contacting their comrades on any other worlds.

The twelve member council seated on a raised dais (probably to make them appear more important or powerful than they really were, Caldwell thought) were only eleven right now, due to Sora's absence. Caldwell asked for Sora, knowing full well exactly where she was, and was given some story about her visiting with a sick friend.

"I see," Caldwell nodded.

"Tell us, General Caldwell, what has brought you and your people to Genii?" Tuvic asked.

"Oddly enough, Councilor Tuvic, it's you - all of you - who have brought me here."

The eleven of them exchanged puzzled glances. "How so?" asked Revina.

"I have precious little time, so let me get right down to it," Caldwell began.

"Please," encouraged Revina.

"It has come to our attention that you have decided to take it upon yourselves to be rulers of the galaxy, instead of rulers of your own world," he stated bluntly.

Guilty, surrepticious glances swept between the members of the council. Tuvic cleared his throat dramatically. "I am afraid we have no idea what you mean, General. Please explain."

"I think you are the ones who owe explanations, Councillor Tuvic," Caldwell countered.

"Of all the..."

"You DARE to come into these council chambers and make unfounded accusations against..."

Caldwell held up a hand to stop Revina's rant of mock-indignation.

"Unfounded, Councillors? Tell me, how long HAS it been since you've heard from Sora?"

That silenced them.

"You do know what Sora has been up to this past week..." he trailed off as many of them swallowed and looked around the room.

"As I told you, Sora has been visiting with a sick friend..." Tuvic said.

"On Tergo?" Caldwell asked.

All eleven paled as he named the exact planet Sora had been staying on. They all knew this, as they knew what she'd been doing and who she'd been holding. Kolet's warnings echoed in their minds as it slowly dawned on them that there would be no escaping Caldwell's allegations.

"What business is it of yours what we do? Where we train our military?" Tuvic asked haughtily.

"What business?" Daniel asked. "Aside from the fact that you kidnapped TWO Lanteans and held them captive? One of them a small child?!"

They blanched guiltily.

"Did you really think we wouldn't turn the galaxy upside down looking for them?" Caldwell asked.

"Especially given that the child is one of John Sheppard's?" Carter added, knowing that the name alone was enough to make them cringe.

"So, you have Sora," Tuvic deduced.

"Well, define HAVE..." Caldwell asked.

"She is captive...again...?" Revina asked.

"Sora refused to relinquish the Sheppard's daughter," Teyla explained. "To her mother..." she trailed off dramatically. "I am sure I do not need to tell you what measures the childs mother took to reclaim her."

They again blanched. "She is...dead...?" Tuvic asked.

"Not merely dead, but really most sincerely dead," Daniel quipped. "Or so she would prefer. But... no. Thanks to the skilled marksmanship of Colonel Devane, Sora was merely wounded, rather than killed, much to her chagrin. She's recuperating in one of our prison cells." It was unlike him to appear so cold-blooded, but he'd had more than enough of the Genii.

"I see," Tuvic grimaced. "And this is the fate you have planned for US as well?"

Caldwell smiled grimly. "What do you think?" he asked.

Before anyone could answer, a bright light illuminated the room and the eleven council members suddenly vanished.

"General Caldwell, this is Novak. We have all eleven in the brig," they heard over the radio.

"Good. Keep them on ice. We'll finish up down here. I want the first squadron transported here, to the council chambers. I'll let you know when we're ready for the rest."

"Aye, sir," Novak replied.

Within a matter of hours, the Lanteans had taken complete control of Genii, as well as the two other planets they'd infiltrated that day.

ATLANTIS

"How long before Sora and the others started planning to take over the galaxy?" Logan asked.

Roth grimaced. "Not long, actually. They didn't have the numbers they needed, right away, but it didn't take them long to rally supporters to their cause. I should have known that eliminating Cowan and his men wouldn't be enough. By the time I realized the power Sora had garnered with the council, it was too late for me to stop her."

"And here we thought she'd be grateful to us for freeing her," O'Neill said.

"She was, actually. Grateful, I mean. She had no intention of taking you on - at least not until and unless it became absolutely necessary. She figured that once she had an army behind her, one at least as big as yours, you wouldn't want to risk open war with the Genii and would leave her to her plans."

"Then she really didn't know us as well as she thought, did she?" Logan snorted in disgust.

"You speak of her in the past tense, Colonel...Has something happened to her?" asked Roth.

"She's in one of our prison cells," Logan replied coldly.

"I...see..." he gasped.

"You have no idea what she did, do you, Roth?" O'Neill asked.

"I had not spoken to her directly in some time. What DID she do?"

"She kidnapped Colonel Mitchell and young Chelsea Sheppard," O'Neill informed him.

Roth gasped again and paled. "But, that makes no sense! She wanted nothing more than to maintain good relations with you for as long as possible. Why would she do something so stupid as to kidnap Colonel Mitchell and YOUR daughter, of all people?"

They shrugged. "Apparently, she was setting up camp on the same planet where our people were exploring. Her men scooped them up and took them back to Sora before they knew WHO they had. Sora initially had planned to free them, before they woke up and saw who had them, but she didn't move fast enough."

"I see."

"Do you GRIEVE for her, Roth?" Logan asked icily.

"I grieve for her lost potential, Colonel. Had she not been so... ambitious... she could have been a great leader among the Genii. But I am familiar with how you deal with those who threaten your people... Especially anyone who threatens your family," he grinned weakly. "I think I can safely assume that she refused to give up the child when she was found out?"

"You assume correctly," Logan nodded.

"And you are the one who..."

"Shot her? Yes, I am."

"Has justice been done then?" he asked.

Logan looked at him oddly. "Justice?"

"Are you looking to destroy my people, as a whole, for what Sora and the council have done?" he asked.

"I should think that you, of all people, would know better," Logan replied.

"Even a people as generous and forgiving as yours have their limits."

"That we do." O'Neill agreed. "Still we aren't about to wipe out your whole population because of their leaders. No more than we were when we helped you to oust Cowan."

"I am grateful for that," he inclined his head graciously.

"What we ARE going to do, however, remains to be seen," O'Neill added.

It took a full month before O'Neill and Hammond were satisfied that they had sorted the wheat from the chaff, as far as the Genii were concerned. With a lot of help from Earth, they had managed to weed out, separate and imprison Sora's loyalists. Those who were held in the Genii penal colony, who were NOT Genii, were soon sent back to their own homeworlds. The penal colony was vast in size, capable of handling many hundreds of prisoners, if needed.

The Lanteans took possession of the colony, reinforced much of the structures, installed Lantean shielding and security features and assigned a battalion of troops there to act as prison guards. It was there that they had placed Sora and her loyalists, including the former ruling council. Once the "bad seeds" had been weeded out and dealt with, the only living people who knew the gate address to the planet where the penal colony was, were the Lanteans and the imprisoned loyalists. No one from Genii was permitted to have the gate address, and Roth agreed that was for the best.

Diplomatic representatives had been sent, from Earth, as well, to explain the policies of Earth-style democracy to Roth and his people. They were not there to force the Genii into establishing the same system of government, but merely to act as advisors - to explain options and the pros and cons of various forms of government. They all hoped the Genii WOULD adapt a democratic system of government, one by which the people, as a whole, would decide who would lead and what laws were just.

By this time, Nic was pretty well fully recovered from his illness and back to running around like his old self. The other children were thriving and their parents had never been happier or more content. Also, by this time, it seemed a massive fertility wave swept over Atlantis as first Riateh, then Weir, Lyta, Teyla, Kitah and, finally, Carter all announced that they were expecting within a week of each other. Eyes then turned expectantly toward Logan, in anticipation of an announcement from her, as well. As they sat around the table, at their weekly girls poker night, she just laughed and held up her hands, shaking her head.

"Nope, not me!" Logan chuckled.

"Not yet, you mean," Lyta corrected her.

"No, no, we haven't been trying to..." she began.

"But you haven't exactly been trying NOT to!" Carter accused.

"What?" Logan asked.

"Come on, Logan...You think we all don't see the way you and John look at each other?" Weir asked.

"Wha..."

"She's right," Kitah added. "It is as if the two of you have only just been married."

"Come ON!" Logan blushed.

"No, really," Carter laughed at her discomfort. "And I'm not talking about PDA's here, the way you two look at each other, even from across a room..."

"The temperature rises ten degrees whenever you're in the same room together!" Weir finished for her.

"PDA's?" Lyta asked.

"Oh, sorry... It stands for Public Display of Affection," Carter explained.

"Okay, I admit it, I'm in love with my husband," Logan blushed.

"Of course, but it's more than that, and you know it!" Carter stated.

"You are also very much in LUST with him," Riateh said.

"RIATEH!" Logan gasped as they all looked at her in surprise and started giggling.

"MY husband explained the meaning of that to me," she explained unashamedly.

"And that's a BAD thing?" Logan teased.

"Not from where I am sitting," Riateh smiled shyly.

"Not from where any of us are sitting!" Weir admitted.

Something suddenly dawned on Logan as they sat there giggling like schoolgirls. "Wait, Sam...How is Rodney dealing with this?" she asked curiously.

"Actually, he doesn't know yet," she admitted.

"What?!" they asked in unison.

"He's been off with Hermiod for two weeks conducting tests and it wasn't something I wanted to tell him over the radio," she shrugged. "I've been dying to tell someone, and I knew I could trust all of you to be...discreet."

"We WILL!" they all assured her.

"And we won't say anything to the guys until you have a chance to tell Rodney. He'll probably want to share that news himself," Logan added.

"Thanks. You know, I've waited so long for this but, I have to admit, I'm a little...scared...now." Carter admitted.

"I think it's safe to say that we all were," Lyta assured her.

"And Rodney is probably going to freak out!" Weir said.

That sent them all into peals of laughter, even Carter. They all knew that, while Rodney had actually turned out to be quite wonderful with the Atlantis children, he never quite saw himself as a father.

THE FOLLOWING DAY - PK3-909

"We are here to escort you home," Logan repeated herself.

McKay stared at her, then blinked a few times. "I heard you... Why?"

It was Logan's turn to stare. "Because it's time for all good little boys to come home now, Rodney. You can't stay out here and play forever," she snarked.

McKay smirked. "Funny...Yes, yes, very amusing. I MEANT why did YOU come to take me home? You're not an off-worlder... anymore."

"I need to get out once in a while, too, Rodney. Take a little joyride now and then. Even a place as wonderful as Atlantis can feel sort of like a gilded cage after a while, you know?" There was just a hint of sadness or melancholy in her voice and eyes.

"Oh. Right. Well..." he trailed off awkwardly.

"It's okay, Rodney. I still love my job. I don't regret trading off-world missions for marriage and motherhood," she smiled and looked down at the young boy gripping her hand tightly as he looked around in wonder.

"Wassat?" Scott pointed at something behind him.

McKay and Logan followed his line of vision.

"That is a MALP, Cadet Mitchell," McKay explained, squatting down to the child's eye level. "You never saw a MALP back in Atlantis?"

"No MAP in 'lantis...Wassat?" he asked again.

McKay took the boy by the hand and led him over to the MALP and patiently explained to him what a MALP was and why they used it. Logan watched them together and smiled indulgently. McKay had always been wonderful with her children. He was patient and understanding and he really seemed to enjoy their company. He always got a kick out of watching them play with the cats Logan and Sheppard had gifted him with years before. It was a complete mystery to her why he felt he wasn't cut out for fatherhood.

"Okay boys!" she called out. "Time to go!"

"Awwww!" they both exclaimed, trudging resignedly back to where she was standing.

She helped McKay pack up the rest of his gear, what hadn't already gone with Hermiod earlier, into the jumper and instructed them to get buckled into their seats.

"I fy!" Scott proclaimed.

"You fly?" Logan arched an eyebrow at her. "Since when?" she asked.

"Me fy Dadda," he announced proudly.

"Uh-oh," McKay cringed.

"Is that right?" Logan kept a neutral smile plastered on her face.

"I show?" he asked hopefully.

"Oh yes, son, please show Mama what Daddy lets you do," she encouraged him.

Scott crawled onto her lap and waved one tiny hand over the console, instantly bringing the jumper to life, then wrapped his hands around the controls. "Pwee-fight check!" he said seriously, causing both her and McKay to smile.

Logan patiently went through the pre-flight, secretly impressed that he knew each and every item to check prior to taking off.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Slowly now," Logan warned.

"Aye," he murmured, concentrating intently as the jumper immediately lifted from the ground. He turned to beam proudly up at her for only a moment before turning his full attention back to what he was doing. "I fy!" he announced happily.

"Great! Even a two-year old is a better pilot than I am," McKay threw up his hands in mock dismay.

"Daddy doesn't let you fly in space, does he?" she asked.

His lower lip protruded. "No. Only in bu sky," he pouted.

"Uh-huh. Well, Space-Cowboy, we're about to go into the dark space, so you better hop down and let Uncle Rodney strap you into your seat, okay?"

He nodded, reluctantly releasing the controls before hopping down and stretching his arms out to McKay. McKay picked him up and carried him back to the seat directly behind the co-pilot chair, strapping him in securely before ruffling his hair and planting a kiss on his forehead.

"All set?" Logan asked, looking back at him.

He flashed her a double thumbs-up along with his fathers smile.

"Next stop, Atlantis!" she announced.

"Yay!" Scott cheered.

"Not so much for his father," McKay whispered to her.

"You've got that right," she murmured back.

"Come on, Chelsea and Nic have been flying for a while now, even Tommy. You can't really expect Mitchell's kids not to. Piloting is in their blood, too," he chided.

"I'd prefer they were a little older than TWO, Rodney!" she argued.

"Yes, well, I'd prefer that a two year old, ANY two year old not be better at anything than me, but we can't always have everything we want, can we?" he huffed.

"Gate!" Scott pointed as soon as he caught sight of the orbiting stargate.

"Yep," she smiled back at him as she began dialing Atlantis.

Suddenly a proximity alarm began blaring and the HUD lit up just as the jumper was rocked by several small impacts, knocking it violently off-course.

"Mamma!" Scott cried out in sudden fear.

"It's okay, baby," she assured him. "Rodney?"

"Meteors?!" he gasped in shock. What the..."

The jumper was rocked by yet another impact, bigger than the last. Their shields were useless, having been damaged by the first meteor hits.

"This shouldn't be happening!" McKay said, confused and somewhat panicked.

"I couldn't agree more, Rodney... I'm losing control on the left..."

Another impact sent them spinning around wildly. Logan was able to regain some control almost instantly, but the jumper was too damaged now and they were rapidly losing altitude as well as power.

"Crap," she muttered under her breath.

"I'm on it," McKay jumped up and went back to try and re-route the circuits in the rear control panel.

"Mama?" Scott asked, still afraid, but not panicking or crying.

"We're okay baby, we're just going to have to set down and let Uncle Rodney fix the jumper before we go home."

"Okay," he nodded.

Logan steered them back down to the planet, but she was barely able to maintain even a modicom of control over their descent. Neither she nor McKay wanted to scare him, but the situation was dire. She wasn't sure if she could safely land the jumper before they lost all power and control, and from the sound of his muttering, neither was McKay. There was a sudden loud grating noise, a bang, shudder and then the jumper went completely dark.

"Crap! Rodney, strap in!" she called out.

"Mama!" Scott popped open his seatbelt and hopped out of his seat, in a blind panic, to get to his mother.

"Scotty, nooooo!" she called out, reaching for the clasp on her own belt.

"Scotty!" McKay shouted, running forward and grabbing the boy, shielding him with his body as the jumper slammed into a stand of trees on the ground.


End file.
